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Today's show was over around 11:00am.
Howard said his mother was asking when this pandemic is going to be over. He said she was asking what Dr. Agus says. He said he doesn't bother the guy so he just told her to sit tight and everything will be fine. He said she asked when he thinks they can leave the house. He said he told her that they can leave soon. He said she thinks that he's inventing the vaccine. He said he was trying to brag that he knows the guy who is inventing the vaccine. He said his family thinks he can get in touch with people like that. He said they think he's at the center of everything. Robin said she did too. She said it's a shame he's not.
Howard said he told his mother that even talking on the phone is dangerous now. He said his mother asks him how his kids are doing. He said he told her that they see each other on the computer. He said he has explained to her how it works but they refuse to get a computer. He said his daughters even ask if they can get her one so they can Zoom with her. He said they can't get her one. He said she refuses to take one.
Howard said he has a person who checks on his parents and she has a computer. He said she sees what she has going on and she still doesn't want it. He said he has to send her pictures to show his mother. He said one of his daughters said they're going to send her something but he told them not to tell her that it's on the way. Robin said there is something that can be used just as a phone. Howard said his kids are getting her something that shows pictures.
Howard said he has told his parents about all of this technology that he can get them and they want nothing to do with it. Robin said they are going to fall apart during all of this. Howard said his parents can go outside and avoid all people. He said they can schedule it. He said they have to go to the doctor so that's how they get out. He said they go to the doctor just about every day. He did an impression of his mother talking about all of this.
Howard said he can see that his vision is fucked up and things are happening for him getting older. He said he can't see things on the TV screen when they have text up there. He said he has to ask his wife what it says. He said he's not sure what's going on. He said he went to he eye doctor and he was told it's basically the same. He said he doesn't get that.
Howard said the whole thing is absurd. He said it's absurd that Ralph Macchio got to be with the hot chick. He said Netflix got the series from YouTube and now they're going to do a third season. He said the whole thing is horribly done. He said it's done on the cheap. He said he hopes Netflix puts some money into it.
Howard said that the whole idea for the show is ridiculous. He said he's thinking time is running out in his life and he's watching Cobra Kai on Netflix.
Howard said he Googled the original The Lone Ranger with Clayton Moore. He said he started watching that. He said it was the first episode where he meets Tonto. He said it's fantastic. He said you have to watch ''Away'' too. He said the show is really good. He said you feel like you're on a trip to Mars.
Robin said that's as close as he's going to get to going to Mars. Howard said that's as close as he's going to get to going to a supermarket.
Howard said that Cobra Kai is really bad. Robin said it is and she wasn't recommending it. She just watched it. Howard said you'd think that Ralph Macchio would have kept up with Karate but you can tell he hasn't kept up with it. He said he likes Ralph is a car dealer and all of his commercials are about Karate and he gives away a Bonsai tree with every car he sells. He said the writers of the show should have to tell people how they got into the Writer's Guild.
Robin said Ralph is always looking for Mr. Miagi and he becomes other people. She said a guy was giving him advice like he was Mr. Miagi. Howard said the guy who wrote that mess also wrote Hot Tub Time Machine.
Howard said he was worse than them. He said he was the original social distancer. He said people stayed at least 6 feet away. He said if a woman walked up to him and said she was Osama bin Laden's niece and it's 9/12. He said if someone attractive walks up to him he's banging her. He said he doesn't care who she is. He said he'll go out with her because he wants a girlfriend. He said he would go out with her. Howard said in high school he dated Hitler's cousin. He said she was considerably older. He said he introduced her to his parents. He said he told them not to blame her. Robin said this is Sarah Hitler.
Howard said he realized many years ago that he is too ugly to have standards. Pocket asked about using the N-word. Howard said he dated a model who used that word as they were leaving a club. He said she called the bouncer the N-word and then got in his car. He said he threw her out. Howard said he was famous by then so he had some options.
Howard said if he was with a girl who used the N-word constantly he'd hope that he'd get out of that. Robin said she thinks he'd bang her and then never bang her again. Howard said he'd hear the word and think she didn't say it.
Howard said he had a strange relationship with sex in high school. He said there were months were he had sex but it was with ugly human beings. He said then out of the blue his luck would change and he'd be dating the hottest girls. He said it never lasted long though. He said he'd get an incredibly hot girl and it was weird. He said it was either the ugliest girl or the hottest girl. He said he wanted something in the middle. He said then he'd surprise himself and break up with the good looking person. He said he does have some standards.
Robin said maybe he wouldn't date the niece. Howard said he thinks he might. He said maybe he wouldn't though.
Howard asked what the plan is for him. He said he thinks he's safe to stay down there until January or February at least. He asked if he's renting down there. Shuli said they never owned a place in New York. He said they rented for 9 years. He said it was a great neighborhood. He said they have two kids and in the matter of 3 months everything went to shit around them. He said they have a Citizen's app that shows what's going on around you. He said it's been like a tote board of shit going on around them.
Howard asked if there was anything in between there and Alabama to live in. He asked how old the kids are. He said they have some of the worst schools down there. Shuli asked according to who. Howard said the stats show it. He said it's not like sending the kids to Harvard.
Howard asked if he knows anyone down there. Shuli said he has a friend down there who lives there. He said they looked at about 20 houses there and they're all selling. Howard said he's sure based on his salary that he has a nice spread down there. He said he gets all of that. He said but now they're in Alabama. Shuli said they're still doing comedy indoors down there and the comedy scene is great down there too.
Howard asked what he's going to do if they go back to work. Shuli said that as long as they're working from home then he's fine. He said his issue was that his family didn't feel safe and he made the decision to move. He said he wanted them to feel safe. Howard said it's Alabama though. Shuli said he had to go see what was going on down there. He said when they went down there it was the opposite of what you think it is. Howard said he's not saying he's wrong. He said JD is in Siberia now. He said he has a 10 bedroom house that he paid $10 for.
Shuli asked Howard if there is a vaccine in November when does Howard go back to work. Howard said he's asking a question that's difficult to answer. Howard said if he has to go back to work he is closer than Shuli is. Shuli said if they get to that point where they have to go back to the building then they'll figure something out. Shuli said no one knows what the fuck they're doing with this thing. Howard asked why he's so angry. Shuli said he just thinks it's silly. Howard said he sounds defensive. He said he's just asking how he came to Alabama because if they do go back his commute would be 3 days. Shuli said it's a 14 hour drive. Howard said the move was supposed to relax him. Shuli said he was fine until this conversation.
Howard asked what time zone he's in. Shuli said he's an hour earlier than they are. Howard laughed. He said he's now broadcasting from Alabama.
Howard took a call from Shuli's neighbor who was talking about the big old house he lives in. He said that's driving up the prices of the houses down there. He said he's going to visit him with his dog later. He said it's going to be a blast for him down there. He got on his horse and rode off.
Howard said in 2018 the New York Times listed Alabama as the 18th most dangerous state to live in. Shuli said it's been great down there so far. He said he hasn't heard a horn honk the whole time he's been there. Howard read some more details about Alabama. Shuli asked where the stats for the crime in New York is. He said crime and shootings are up there. Howard said he chose Alabama though. Shuli said he feels safe there. Robin asked if there's anywhere else he could have felt safe. Shuli said he looked in Jersey. Howard said Gary is moving to Maine or something. Gary said he would if they were never going back to work.
Howard said everyone is looking to him if they're coming back. He said he has no idea because he's in his basement. Gary said Howard may never come back but that doesn't mean that they wont go back to the office. He said Howard could stay at home and they will go back to the office. He said that could happen.
Shuli said this is the best case scenario for stress in their lives. Howard asked if this is a big plan to ditch the family and move back to New York. Shuli said he can barely keep one family. He said he can't juggle 2.
Howard said Shuli's move didn't slow him down. He said he had something with Tan Mom. Shuli said she had her Tan Talk thing. Howard said it's a Pay-Per-View thing she does. Shuli said it's her and Adam Barta. Howard said this was supposed to be a fun talk about tanning. He said she wasn't in a good mood though. He said that Adam and Tan Mom did their broadcast from home and in their pre-show meeting Tan Mom told Adam not to make her look bad.
Howard said this is before they hit their air. He played a clip where Tan Mom was talking to Adam about not making her look bad. She was yelling at him about that.
Howard talked to Tan Mom Puppet being controlled by Shuli. He did his Tan Mom impression for Howard for a few minutes.
Howard said Tan Mom was talking to the fans about the dangers of tanning. He played another clip where she was talking about that. Adam Barta got her into that discussion. Tan Mom said her ex-husband has cancer and it's awful for you to tan outside.
Howard said he figured it would be pro-tanning but it was anti-tanning. Robin said it's as downer too. Howard said the show was supposed to happen in June but her hip popped out so she had to delay it. Tan Mom Puppet was talking about Adam and getting his name wrong while talking about him.
Howard said Tan Mom's husband had a stroke and he got cancer so she's taking care of him now. Howard said Tan Mom was ready to end the broadcast after just 5 minutes. He said people pay for this thing so it was supposed to go longer. Howard played a clip of Tan Mom talking about tanning outside again and getting frustrated. She said she got distracted and it's not relevant for everyone. She said she just can't do this video right now. Adam told her to take a breath. Tan Mom said she was having a great time before. She said she's sorry she ever got married. She said they're talking about cancer and UV rays.
Howard said Adam is her Robin. He said Adam keeps her grounded. Robin said this is amazing. She said she has never heard a show like this in her life. Howard said Adam was watching 10s of dollars disappear. Tan Mom puppet said that she just got distracted too. She said the sun revolves around the earth.
Howard said Tan Mom really takes you on a journey in these specials. He said Adam got her back on track when he asked her about indoor tanning. Howard played another clip where she talked about what to do with indoor tanning. She talked about drinking water when you're doing that. She said you can get sexually frustrated in a tanning booth too. She said you get so hot down below that you want to fool around. She said she's sorry that her ex-husband got her upset.
Howard said she was on a great roll there. Tan Mom puppet talked about how sexually excited she gets in the tanning booth.
Howard said poor JD had to watch every minute of the special. He said they're just playing the highlights. He said maybe they should play the whole special on their channel. He said you can see how long you can last. Robin said she thinks she could listen to the whole thing. Howard asked JD if she could get through it. JD said it is a bit of a train wreck so you like seeing that sometimes. He said a lot of stuff that was cut was her showing off her creams and stuff like that. JD said it is great when she talks about tanning and then talks about cancer and hating marriage.
Howard said JD is broadcasting from Botswana. He said he moved and found a cheap house there.
Howard said they're just hearing the highlights. He said if Amy Winehouse had lived this might be what she would sound like.
Howard said Adam kept trying to keep things light but Tan Mom kept getting serious. Howard played a clip where Tan Mom talked about people getting cancer and how her ex-husband got it. She said don't hang around to comfort someone forever. She said you have to live your own life. She said that every man just wants to have sex. Adam said having a tan makes you feel sexy.
Howard said this is the hardest Adam ever had to work. Tan Mom puppet made a statement and said as Americans we are in a place we have never been before. She threw in random words in the middle of her speech.
Howard asked JD if there was anything redeeming during this special. JD said some of the graphics that Adam created were good. He said they were professional looking to him. He said if you're looking for tanning tips then no.
Howard asked JD what he thinks about Shuli living in Alabama. JD said he has to do what he has to do. He said it makes sense to him in a way. He said he's staying in the tri-state area for now himself. He said he's not questioning someone else's move. Howard said he should find similar people down there and he's a trend setter.
Howard said JD doesn't like swimming but they went away to a lake. Howard had some notes and they said he went on a hike and fell into the mud 3 times. He said he fell on his ass the first time. JD said it was all three times he fell on his ass. JD said his wife was fine. He said he didn't have his hiking boots with him.
Howard said JD went to McDonald's after the hike. He said he claims he hadn't had it in 5 years and he had violet diarrhea after he ate it. JD said it was 45 minutes later.
Howard said JD is looking to move out of New York. Robin said it would be funny if everyone moved to Alabama. Howard said JD's internet is messed up. He said he's frozen up on Zoom. JD said he's sorry.
Howard said two days later he was having his happy hump day celebration. Howard said when she called Ronnie he told him he was crying over the cat dying. Howard said he has done that too. He said Ronnie likes to go out yelling out ''Cunt'' and stuff like that.
Howard got Ronnie on and asked when he went out yelling like that. Ronnie said he doesn't know. Howard said Ronnie and Stephanie didn't have sex the night the cat died. He said it's shocking that it didn't happen. Ronnie said there are other ways of pleasing your lady.
Howard asked how he's feeling. Ronnie said that this whole year has just been such shit. Howard said he understands his dilemma. He said he was going to move to Vegas and all of that. Ronnie said he was going to retire. Howard said he's the first one to cheer someone up. He said he knows he had this whole thing set up. He said he worked his ass off his whole life and he was going to retire. He said he's a hard working guy. Howard said he gets to his 70th year and wonders how much more time he has left. He said then he's thinking about what bullshit this is.
Robin said Ronnie talked about how this COVID is taking up his good time. She said he's not sure how long he'll have that and this is taking up that time. Howard said he didn't get to meet hot chicks or anything this year. Ronnie said he had to cancel a trip 4 times already.
Howard said he has a song called ''Sad Ronnie'' that he hasn't heard yet. He played the song about Ronnie getting bummed out. Howard said that is a sad song. He said maybe he should move to Alabama. Ronnie said he's happy for the guy. He said he spoke to him a few times before the move. He said he was really excited about it. He said he must have figured to take the shot. Robin asked if he made sense to him. Ronnie said not really if the show moves back to the studio. He said he's not sure that he can work over Zoom. Howard said he can work on there but they won't be there for him.
Howard said Ronnie was upset too because this is when he throws his block party. He said this year he was all alone. Ronnie said there was no big party this year. He said he sat there all alone this year. He said he can see Long Island Sound from there so he sat and looked at the water.
Howard said Ronnie went to a restaurant with Stephanie. Ronnie said he went just once. He said it's his buddy's place and they have a tent outside. He said everything is spaced out right and all of that. He said they wear masks and gloves and it was gorgeous out. He said the place was packed when grey got there. He said he was looking at everyone not wearing a mask. He said he walked up and he was like holy shit. He said his buddy put them at a table near the building so they had no one by them. He said after a couple of drinks he was realized. He said they were there until 2:30 in the morning. He said he was excited to be out. He said he talked to Mike and sat with him. He said he saw some people he hadn't seen in a long time. He said he had a great time and then they next day he was flipping out wondering what the fuck he did last night. He said he wondered if he was going to get sick or not. He said it was 3 weeks ago so he's fine but he was freaking out. He said it's such a head game.
Robin said you wonder if you're coughing because you're sick or not. Ronnie said the night is fine when you drink but then the next day you get paranoid. Robin said he's like a teenager. Howard said you have to think about that stuff. Ronnie said they got in a major fight about it. He said Stephanie wants to get out. He said that they can sit in the back yard but she wants to go out. Ronnie said he had a few drinks in him and he started fighting with her about going out. He said she called Mike and set things up. He said they went out after that. He said he had a good time.
Howard asked if he has a feeling that she's trying to get rid of him. Ronnie said he thinks she just wants to get him out and make him feel better. Howard said Gary gave him reports and said that Ronnie was depressed during their Happy Hour Zoom meeting.
Gary said that Ronnie is a regular there and he stopped in to ask how he was doing and he was really bummed out. He said it was a heavy depression and he felt bad for him. Ronnie said the cat dying thing was really heavy. He said they had it for 5 years and it was a rescue. He said it was 10 when they got him and he had never had a cat before. He said he got very close to the cat. He said he had a stroke last year and he wasn't able to jump anymore. He said he managed to get around though. He said he made due with what he had. He said then he had a stroke 2 weeks ago and he was just laying there. He said it was really depressing. He said he knew something was really wrong with him. It turns out he had pancreatic cancer and they had to put him down. He said he didn't go to the place Stephanie works so she had him put down. He said he had to clean up his shit from the room he was staying in. He said it was horrible.
Robin said she's sorry this is happening to him. Howard said he was so depressed they didn't have sex that night. Ronnie said they didn't have it all weekend. He said Stephanie was upset too though. He said she sees it every day. He said she works in Oncology and she sees that happen every day. He said she has a thicker skin for it. He said he can't deal with it.
Howard said he has Ronnie's mom on the phone. Ronnie said he hasn't talked to her in a while. Howard took the call from Ronnie's mom who told him not to feel bad because things are going to be okay. She said he has a lot to look forward to... in his balls. She said that he's got a lot more loads in there. Howard asked if she's proud of his loads. Ronnie's mom said ''Oh yeah!'' Howard said Ronnie is sad because he didn't expect his elderly years to look like this.
Howard said Ronnie still seems sad. He said this isn't cheering him up. Ronnie did laugh at some of the stuff his fake mom was saying. Howard said he sees where Ronnie gets his speech pattern. He asked if she's social distancing and wearing a mask. Ronnie said she does but she keeps a cut out so she can blow guys. She said if Dr. Fauci has a problem with that then she'll blow him too.
Howard said he wants her to stay safe during this time. Ronnie's mom said she has a good son. She said she's staying safe by swallowing Hydrochlorojizz. She puked after that. Howard said he thought that she'd make Ronnie feel better. Ronnie said she did make him feel better.
Beth brought in some stuff for Howard. Howard thanked her and let her know that he was talking to Ronnie and his mom. Howard said a lot of people blame his mother for his depression. Ronnie's mom said look at that face. She said that Howard is kind of gross and not handsome like her Ronnie.
Howard said Robin is handling this quarantine just fine. Robin said she's not depressed. Ronnie's mom said they turned her pussy into a Halloween store. That got a big laugh from everyone. Howard said he's not depressed and Robin isn't depressed. He said even Fred isn't depressed. Ronnie's mom said that Fred looks like he has never had a dildo up his ass. She said he has never done any of that. Howard said it's been great talking to her. He said Ronnie is sad and even Sal isn't that depressed. Ronnie's mom said that he can shove his foreskin up his ass but she can shove her tits up her own ass.
Howard said even Richard feels pretty good. Ronnie's mom said good because he's a drunk. She said his liver is so black that it's fucking a Kardashian. Howard said that's not nice.
Howard said JD is less depressed than Ronnie. Ronnie's mom said that JD lives on fast food and there's nothing fast about him.
Howard said it's been good catching up with her. Ronnie's mom said this call has dragged on too long like his contract negotiations. She sang a song about getting horny. She asked Ronnie to sing along with her. Ronnie sang ''Don't worry be horny'' with her.
Howard said he has to take a break and get to more stuff. He said they have to get an update about Gary urinating on his toe nails. He said forget the break and asked Gary what's going on there. Gary said that he has a feeling that it's going to work but he's going to change the way he's been doing it. He said he has been peeing on them for 2 weeks but he's going to start peeing in a pee bucket an then put his toes in that. He said he figured washing it off isn't going to work. Howard played a song parody about him peeing on his feet and then went to break.
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Howard came back and talked about how good this band Hole was. He said they had a good album and then one that wasn't quite as good. He said the story is that Billy Corgan produced the first one. Robin said she thought Curt Cobain helped with the first one. Howard said he's not sure what happened but that wasn't a good move for Courtney to split from Billy. He said her band was good though.
Howard said he watched the MTV Video Music Awards over vacation. He said they don't even play music on that channel anymore. He said he watched it to see what the kids are up to and they're up to a lot of shitty music. He said he admires them for trying to do an award show during the pandemic. He said people recorded great performances but the music wasn't that good. He said the show was a bore fest overall. He said Mel Karmazin used to tell him about why they had the awards show because they can get a great amount of money from doing that. He said he's not sure they can do that so much these days.
Howard said this guy Machine Gun Kelly was on the red carpet and he had heard about him for a while now. He said he wondered what he's doing calling himself Machine Gun Kelly. He said he came out and got his award before the show. He said he must not be big enough to get one on the show. He said he didn't like the guy's name or his attitude. He said that he wondered who he thinks he is calling himself Machine Gun Kelly. He said he talked to Pete Davidson about him and wondered what was up with this guy.
Howard said this guy Machine Gun Kelly was so good on the show. He said his whole attitude changed. He said he debates the name but he is really talented. He said he hated himself for liking him. He said he's a good looking guy who is banging Megan Fox now so he's jealous of that. He said his music is really good though.
Howard said he has some of his performance to play. He said he was there with Travis Barker on drums. He said it was a great performance. He said just listen to this guy. He played a song that the two of them performed. He said he was the only one who was good. He said his song was good. He said he watched the whole performance. He said he was excited about the Black Eyed Peas were on too and they showed up without Fergie. He said they have to get her back in there. He said no offense to them but the other chick they got wasn't like Fergie. He said they need her. He said the other girl was fine but it wasn't fun. Howard said he heard Fergie moved to Alabama.
>Howard said he's a Machine Gun Kelly fan now. He said check out the visual on MTV and you'll see that he can sing and play guitar. He said it was good.
Howard said the Black Eyed Peas without Fergie isn't good. Robin said that song reminded her of Green Day. Howard said it was very 90s rock like. He said they say Fergie is concentrating on being a mom. Howard said his mom did that and it was a disaster. He said just look at how he turned out. He said they need Fergie so bad.
Howard had a clip of Eddie talking about the interview he was going to do with him. He said he was going to have a few drinks after the show and then talk to Howard Stern the next day. He said he's heard some of the interviews he's done with musicians and he appreciates him.
Howard said that really bummed him out. He said this Coronavirus is messing things up. Howard said he's thinking back to right before Coronavirus. He said he sent Richard and his wife to the Super Bowl. He said Richard's dad warned them about the Coronavirus. He said they were thinking it was a big joke but it wasn't. Howard said check this out. Howard played a clip where they were talking about that on the show. Richard said his parents are wearing masks when they go out. This was back in February.
Howard said this is like hearing about a gay guy not wearing a condom back in the 80s. Howard said he was thinking about right before Coronavirus hit and how they had weird things like King of All Blacks talking about how black people can't get Coronavirus. He played a clip of that too. Robin said that now black people are dying from it and King of All Blacks hasn't called in. Howard said they are being affected the most now.
Howard said he was sad to see that a 49 year old guy in the Temptations died. He said they're not the same Temptations but this guy was just 49. Robin said he was not an original.
hoar said he was really bummed that they didn't get Eddie Vedder in there. He said they had to cancel that concert too. He said he loves that Eddie hears his interviews. He said he would have loved to have had him in there.
Howard said they had a bit where Sal and Richard rolled Jason in a carpet and tried to roll him. Howard said he's not sure when they can get back to things like that in the studio. He said he has a feeling they'll never be able to do that again.
Howard said he went back and listened to their first broadcast when grey were on Zoom. He said you have to hear this. He played a clip where he was on Zoom and sounding really bad. Everyone had echo on their voices.
Howard said they sounded like they were on Eric the Actor's show. He said they may not get back to things like that any time soon where they can have Benjy jerking off Sal and Richard.
Howard said he doesn't know but the stock for Zoom is up to $370 a share. Robin said it was like a 300 percent jump before COVID hit. Howard said he relies on Zoom so much now. He said he was trying to have a meeting over vacation and he didn't know what to do when it wasn't working. He said they need it now. Robin said it's like a utility now.
Howard said they tried to use something similar to Zoom and it wasn't working. He said Zoom is doing it right. Robin said they were trying to expand before COVID and they were ready for this influx of business. She said they were able to get people on when this started happening.
Howard said they're using Zoom as a verb now. Robin said they are. She said that's like what you call this now.
Howard said he was thinking that Zoom started COVID to get business. Robin said it was perfect for their platform. Howard jokingly said this guy Bob Zoom created it. Howard said their stock is $370 and Sirius is at $5.70.
Howard said he's going to have to go to get his teeth cleaned at some point. He said he would imagine that the dentist and the people working there are protected. Gary said he went to the dentist before his surgery. He said it was a required appointment. Howard said he has such big teeth that he has to go. He said he can't skip his dental appointment. Gary said it has something to do with you not having an infection in your mouth.
Gary said he went and felt very comfortable and that was pretty early on. Howard said he's not sure he can wait. He said with his luck his teeth will fall out of his head. Howard said they were afraid that Gary's teeth would grow too much and had to file them down. Robin said she had a horse and they continue to grow so they have to be filed down every so often. Howard said Gary has started urinating in his own mouth to try to keep them from growing.
Gary asked if he listens to Pop Rocks. Howard said they play two songs on Spectrum so much that they must be getting paid to play them. He said he doesn't even know the songs that well. He said that he's not sure why grey play them so often. He said one is ''Strong Enough'' by Ray LaMontagne. He played some of the song. Howard said he has no idea who the guy is. He said the song is good though. He said the other song is ''Giants'' by Dermot Kennedy. He played some of that song for Robin too. He said the songs are good but they should play them like once every 2 days. Gary said they have another song by that guy that's a ballad that they play a lot too. Howard said they play a lot of good stuff on that channel.
Howard said on Deep Tracks they play some good stuff. He said they have some Beatles songs that he's never heard. He said that they had a song that John Lennon did. He said he changed the lyrics on a song. He said he thought this was great. He played a version of John Lennon singing ''Child of Nature.'' He said that changed to ''I'm Just a Jealous Guy.''
Howard said he loves the process of song writing. He said that he loves interviewing song writers. He said he has talked to guys who have said they can hear a song like it's playing in their head and then someone like John Lennon changes from ''Child of Nature'' to ''I'm Just a Jealous Guy.'' He said he's not sure how that happens.
Robin said they had a special this weekend on the Beatles channel and they played every song in order of their recording. Howard said Jealous Guy was a John Lennon solo that was changed. He said they cut that song and released it. He said that's why he loves SiriusXM. He said they have a lot of information.
Gary said they have a channel called Pop Rocks and it's pop songs but they also have Blink 182 and bands like that. Robin said they can have a clunker there too. Gary said that's true. Gary said he thinks Howard might like it. Howard said he likes some pop tunes too so he'll listen to that too.
Gary said he got a comment that's about 15 years old now. He said he said he hopes that Jackson and Lucas get AIDS from your gay, fag brother. He said that rocked him. Howard said imagine how shitty your life has to be to do that kind of thing. He said imagine how shitty your life has to be to set that whole thing up.
Gary said he was so upset about that. He said that guy wrote into the show saying that he just wrote that because he was trying to get his attention. Howard said think about the logistics of that. Howard said the brother is dead and he can't give the kids AIDS. Howard said he should have written back to him about that.
Howard said he would love to follow a guy like that around in his daily life. He said he'd love to know what their life is like. Gary said he and Jason were very close to calling a guy's boss to tell him what his worker was saying. He said it was something so vile that Jason wanted to do that too. Gary said Jason thought the same thing once. Howard asked if you're shocked about what the guy is up to. Gary said there are guys who will talk about how ugly his family is and you look at their family and they have a fat wife and you just don't comment. He said he was close to dialing the number of this guy's boss and telling him what this one guy was up to.
Howard said he would watch a show where you confront the trolls. He said he bets 90 percent of the time they would say they're just big fans. Gary said there is an amazing video of a boxer in England where the guy goes to meet this troll. Howard said it's really smart to pick on a boxer. Gary said the guy never came down. He said he wanted no part of that. Howard said he would watch a show like that if someone wants to produce it.
Howard said he does love this company. He said he loves working for these guys. He said he has only met one of the two main guys there. He said the one guy is busy buying up everything. He said Jim Meyer is the guy he deals with and he loves that guy. He said if he leaves he's not sure he wants to be there. Mariann said she loves Howard and 24/7 she listens to him. She said that the Wrap Up Show did a special about her and she was crying over that. Howard hung up on her after she started to sing ''All I need is Howard in my life.''
Howard said you can't pick a better company to work for. He said it's been great working there. Robin said they've been there for 15 years now.
Howard said he has friends who ask him how to get hired there and he has no pull. Robin said she saw that Chris Booker is working there now. Howard said he is. He said he was talking to him over vacation. He said Chris was telling him about how shitty real radio is to work in now.
Howard said he left radio and they started this whole ''free radio'' campaign. He said that was just a dumb thing to do. Howard said they have no commercials on the music channels there. He said they do on their channel though. He did a commercial for Gardein since they sponsored the show today.
Howard took a call from a guy who said Madison was talking about him today on Lithium. Howard said he hears her talk about him all the time. He said it freaks him out. He said she will talk about him and it's like she's talking to him. He said he's sure that he could get her. He said no offense to her husband but he's sure he could get her.
Howard read about what this guy was up to according to this article. He said think about it before you name your kid a Jr. He said you never know how they're going to turn out and ruin your name. Howard said this guy was finally free of his father and then he blows it.
Howard said the quote that goes through his mind is the Martin Luther King Jr. ''Free at last'' thing. He said this guy was free at last and then this stuff blows up.
Howard said fucking the pool boy is so cliché. He said she was literally fucking the pool boy. Robin said she heard someone interviewed the pool boy. Howard wondered if the guy is fucking like crazy now or is that over because the money is gone. Howard said you can't be into your wife if you want her to fuck some other dude.
Howard said at Liberty University they will fine you if you go visit someone of the opposite sex off campus. He said this guy was having his wife fuck the pool boy.
Howard said they fine you $20 for attending a dance at Liberty University. Robin said Jerry says he takes after his grandfather and not his father. She said he claims he was a gambler and a womanizer. Howard said he's sure Jerry Fallwell wasn't that religious. He said he thinks that was all just to make money.
Howard said he saw that they had to cancel shooting the new Batman movie because Rob Pattinson got COVID. He said he doesn't understand the whole thing. He said he knows people who are in hiding and won't go out unless they have to. He said he has other friends who are having parties. He said he can't wrap his head around why they're doing it. He said some of them are older and doing pretty much what they were doing before the pandemic. Howard said it makes him feel like he's the bizarre one. Robin said he's the one not getting COVID.
Robin said she has a friend who was in the ICU and just getting over COVID. Robin said after that he said no one should have to endure this. Howard said he hasn't had a hair cut in over 6 months. He said they're going to do something with a mask and rubber gloves and all of that. He said that they're going to do it outside. He said he hasn't had contact with anyone in 6 months. He said he has to get a flu shot too. Robin said she's not sure where to do that. Howard said he knows where to go for that. Robin said she has to decide where to go. She said her doctor doesn't have it.
Howard said Ronnie is 70 and he can't believe he went out to a restaurant. Robin said one of her friends asked if she misses seeing people. She said she seems them on Zoom all the time. She said her friend wants to hug people. Robin said you can't do that.
Mike said he was in a used book store over the weekend and bought a Disney book called The Wonderful Tar Baby. He said it's shocking how long we found that acceptable. Howard said it's really out of touch and people love to look at that stuff. Mike said he found that for $25 up in Maine. Howard said he loves that they charge $25 for that.
Mike told Howard and Robin about what the book was about and how racist the whole thing was. Mike said as soon as he read that he had to buy it.
Howard let Mike go and talked about the Uncle Remus story that Mike was talking about in the book. Howard said Disney built a whole ride with Uncle Remus. Robin said they replaced him with a pirate. Howard said they had all of the characters singing ''Zipity Do Dah.''
Howard said he has to get to a lot of stuff. He said that Brad Pitt is 56 years old and dating a 27 year old model. He said she's in an open marriage with a 68 year old man. Howard said he's not sure why Brad needs that aggravation. He said he can get any girl he wants and he's getting involved with that. He said you know the 68 year old is going to have an issue with it. Howard said if he was in an open marriage with a woman like that he'd have a ''No Brad Pitt'' clause in it.
Howard took a call from a woman who said that she thinks Howard looks really good now. Howard said he has never been good looking. He asked the caller, Brooke, who she thinks is hot. Brooke said Brad Pitt. Howard said there are like 7 billion people on this planet and half of them would probably bang Brad Pitt. Howard said he thinks out of all of the people he finds he could find someone who isn't in an open marriage. Howard said he has to come on the show and explain that to him.
Brooke said that Howard has great hair and he has great eyes too. She said she doesn't have dreams about Brad but she does have them about Howard. Howard asked what they're about. Brooke said she had one where she was married to him. She said she must sound like a weirdo. Howard said not at all. Brooke said in her dream she's trying to get his attention and get him not to leave her. Howard said they have a real connection in her dream. Brooke said he seems like he's just a really good guy. Howard said he told his wife that the other day. He said he really is a good guy.
Howard said Brooke is the first one to say that she's into Brad Pitt and Howard Stern. He said usually a woman who is into him is into Herman Munster and Lyle Lovett. Howard asked how old she is. Brooke said she's 32. Howard asked who she looks like. Brooke asked who the girl is on Sex and the City. Howard asked if it was Sarah Jessica Parker. She said that's it. She said her nose isn't the same but her hair is similar. Howard said he's into that.
Howard asked if she's wild in bed. Brooke said she thinks she's wild at first. She said she has two kids now and her husband may think different. She said that they had the kids and it's not so wild now. Howard asked what she was doing that was so wild. Brooke said she was open to whatever her husband wanted. Howard asked if she ever had a threesome with her husband. Brooke said not with her husband. She said she has never had a threesome because any time she has tried the guy isn't able to perform. She said she has been in that situation and it never plays out.
Howard asked Brooke what happened with the guys who haven't been able to perform. Brooke said that she's not sure but they can't get it up when they have to get the job done. She told Howard that she was with a guy and a woman who looked like a model. She said the guy went into the bathroom and tried to get it to work by watching porn. She said that was the end of that.
Howard asked if she was into the girl too. Brooke said they may not have been doing enough. She said that they assumed that just being in bed it would work. Howard asked if they were trying to blow him and stuff. Brooke said she was trying to but not the other woman. She said this was with a boyfriend she had back before her husband.
Howard said if he had two naked girls in his bed that would be enough for him. He said he's not sure what the issue was. Brooke said she felt for him. She said it really bothered the guy for days after.
Howard asked how often you can negotiate that to happen and you can't get it up. He said this guy must have jumped out a window. He sake if she's still in touch with him. Brooke said she's not.
Howard asked Brooke to walk him through this. Brooke told Howard she was working with this woman at the time. She said she had a boyfriend and she kind of approached the other woman when she and her boyfriend talked about possibly doing it. Howard asked how she approached the woman. Brooke said it was a long time ago so she's not sure how that all came about. Howard said they were set to have a threesome and they started fucking around in front of the guy. Brooke said kind of yeah.
Howard asked if they were drinking. Brooke said they weren't. Howard said if he had two women looking the way she says they looked he would have to jerk off twice before the threesome to get his shit together. He said even then he would blow his load early. Brooke said that's not the first time it happened to her. She said she was wild in her early 20s and that was the second time. Howard asked how tall she is and how much she weighs. She said she's 5'4'' and 115 pounds. She said she has a full B cup. Howard said she sounds good to him. He said he doesn't even care how big her boobs are. He said he'd play with those flapjacks no matter the size. He said he's finished 4 times since he took her call.
Howard said if he was single he'd have sex with her. Brooke thanked him for that. Howard said he's very generous with his bone. He said it's ready for activity. Howard asked how often she's having sex. He asked if it's at least once a week. Brooke said they have to work on that. She said she has a 5 and 2 year old so they have to work on that. She said her body doesn't seem to want it that much anymore.
Howard asked if Brooke thinks her husband is cheating on her. Brooke said she doesn't think so but he does have a very attractive assistant. She said they have some friends who have split because of things like that. She said she has had those thoughts about him but she's not sure. Howard asked if she's dry down there. Brooke said no. Howard said sometimes that closes up. Brooke said she heard him say that once. Howard said it can close up. He said they can get that thing open.
Howard said he would think that he could get it going pretty quick with her. Brooke said yeah. Howard asked what her favorite position is. Brooke said laying on the bed. She said she just got embarrassed all of a sudden. She said she likes it from behind too. She said bent over the bed and taking it from behind. Howard said she should tell her husband to give it to her like that. She said she doesn't think he'd shy away from that. Robin said that's her assignment tonight.
Howard wondered if Ronnie has any thoughts on this. He got him on and Ronnie said she's only 32 an dried up already. Brooke said she's not dried up. Ronnie asked what's wrong with the husband and why he's not grabbing her and throwing her on the bed and giving her what she wants. He said he has some issue too.
Brooke mentioned she has a thyroid thing going on so that might have something to do with her issues. Ronnie said he's going through something like that too. Ronnie asked what her doctor says about it. Brooke said she has to take medication every day and then she has to get a bone density scan every 3 months.
Howard asked Ronnie Puppet what he has to say. Ronnie Puppet gave her some advice on doing a Fireman trick where you light your partner's pubes on fire and put it out with your jizz.
Brooke said that what she has is Graves disease. She described what can happen to you if you don't take care of it. Ronnie said he'd pack his bags if he was her husband.
Howard said this woman should be fucking like crazy. Ronnie asked how old the husband is. She said he's 38. Ronnie said she should be fucking every 10 minutes. Howard said she has to test the guy tonight. He said see what he does if she comes on to him. He said if he doesn't jump on it then she has a problem. Brooke said she's sure he'd jump on it. Howard told her to tell him to fuck her so hard that her eyes bulge. He said then the Graves disease will make them bulge and he'll think he did something.
Ronnie asked what the assistant looks like. Brooke described her and said she likes to get attention from guys. She said she really doesn't think he's doing anything with her though. Howard asked what he said when she asked him about that. She said he laughed and said of course not. Howard said he thinks she has to start the sex life up again and see what happens.
Brooke said they haven't been getting along very well and they argue a lot. She said she's sure that he doesn't feel great about it. She said she doesn't have the feeling anymore. Howard said maybe if you jump into it then you'll get the feeling back. He said some women don't want to have sex. He said you have to do something or they'll turn that thing into a Halloween store.
Brooke said she thinks she has to do something. Howard said guys who cheat are guys who are rejected by their wife. He said he's not saying that her husband is cheating though.
Howard had Brooke play along with him and practice for tonight. Brooke played along with him and talked about what she'd be wearing when her husband gets home. She said she'll put on some Yoga pants and a t-shirt. Ronnie said Yoga pants but not the t-shirt. He asked if she has a nice round ass. Brooke said she does. She said she has a nice bubble butt according to what people have told her.
Ronnie asked if she has a white tank top. She said she does. He told her not to wear a bra. He told her to wear high heels too. Brooke asked why that is. Ronnie told her to just wear them. Brooke said okay. He told her not to wear a bra.
Howard asked Brooke to tell him what she'd say to him if he were her husband. Howard had the husband talking about how he fucked his assistant today. Brooke asked her husband to go to the bedroom as soon as he gets home and then tells him to lock the door before the kids know what they're up to. Ronnie asked if he has someone who can take care of the kids for a few hours. Brooke said if they plan it then she can find someone. She said they don't have someone to do it spur of the moment.
Howard said with COVID-19 the kids are around all the time. Brooke said she was with them for like 5 months straight but things are getting better.
Howard asked if Ronnie can believe that she was with a guy who wasn't able to get it up in a threesome. Ronnie said there's something wrong with that guy. Howard asked if she and the girl fucked around at all. Brooke said yes. She said it wasn't much but they were kissing and feeling. Ronnie said that's enough for him. He said there's something wrong with that guy.
Howard took a call from Ralph who said that Ronnie is giving bad advice. He said it was weird that he was asking about the thyroid thing. Ralph told her to do something fun and make a date. He said come up with something. Howard said Ronnie gave her good advice. He said all a man needs is a hot outfit and the woman saying ''do me.'' He said you don't need a fantasy night. Ralph said she's not into it and that isn't hot. He said you have to do something fun.
Howard said he did something that turned Beth on. He said he wasn't trying to be Howard Stern and did some house work or something. He said that turned her on. Brooke said work around the house turns her on. She said that might do it for her.
Howard asked Ralph about the guy not being able to get it up for her. Ralph said there's something else going on there. Howard said there's something up with that dude.
Howard asked Ralph if he and Chris Wilding watched Aaron Carter jerk off on Friday night. Ralph said it was the most bizarre thing. He said Chris paid $5 to watch Aaron Carter jerk off on a web cam. Wilding got on and said that Nick Carter is his brother and Aaron Carter was the one jerking off. Chris said he found out in Page Six and he bought it to see what was going on. He said Aaron started out nude right away. He said he has a huge cock and he took a screen shot and sent it to Ralph. He said he was singing some of his big hits and then he charges you more if you want to watch him jerk off. Chris said he paid the $5 again to see it. He said Aaron said he had just a minute left and he wasn't sure if he could cum. He said he blew a huge load though.
Chris said Ralph said ''At least he had a big load.'' Howard asked if Ralph found this uncomfortable at all. Ralph said he didn't log in and pay for it. He said Chris sent him screen shots. He said Chris was on the couch with his mother the whole time. Chris said she was on the couch but not next to him. Howard asked why he was doing it with his mom in the room. Chris said he went to visit his mom in Canada and he found out this was happening so he tuned in. He said he wasn't playing with himself. He said he had it on his phone and he turned it up and Aaron was saying he wasn't going to show his hole. He said his mom asked what that was about. He said it was just something for work.
Howard asked if it's a big deal for a gay guy to see a big load. Chris said it was for him. He said it was for Ralph too.
Chris said after the guy came he shaved his pubes on camera. He said he only paid $10 Canadian so it was less than you'd pay here in the States.
Chris said that Carter came on his keyboard. He said he thinks he was desperate. Howard said it sounds like any heterosexual Friday night for Ralph.
Howard took a call from a guy who said Ralph is gay. Howard said based on this conversation he's going to call him gay? Howard asked why he's so close minded. The caller said that his wife would divorce him if he did what Ralph did. Ralph said he wasn't watching it, he was getting screen shots.
Howard asked if Ralph jerked off to it. Ralph said not at all. He said he had a bit of a flat ass too. Howard asked if he was bummed that he didn't show his hole. Ralph laughed and said yes. Chris said his feet were all dirty too. Howard told Chris to text that stuff to him. Chris said he can't find it. He asked Ralph to send it to Howard.
Howard said he will get back to Brooke in a minute. He said that he has to see this picture. Ralph sent it to him. Howard asked what the fuck this is. He said he's going to throw up. He said he sees a load on a mirror or something. He said he can't handle this. Ralph said this is a good looking guy and Howard is always saying if he was good looking he'd have it made. He said this is what this good looking guy is up to.
Howard said he's so grossed out. Ralph send him another shot of Carter's dick. Howard asked where the cock picture is. Ralph said he's sending it. Chris said it's funny that he doesn't have those pictures anymore but Ralph does. Ralph told him to calm down.
Howard said he has to talk to Brooke again to clear his palate. He said he wishes he had a cock that big. He said if he had one that big he would jerk off for $10 too. He said he'd even show his hole.
Howard asked Brooke how her husband's load is. Ralph asked if he's ever done it on a mirror. She said he hasn't. Howard said Brooke has to get things going with her husband. He asked if Ronnie has anymore advice for her. Ronnie said no. He said he has a feeling that when the guy sees her in the outfit that he'll know what's going on and things will happen. He said she should call back and let them know what happens. Ronnie gave her some advice on what to wear for makeup and shoes and things like that.
Howard said if Brooke remembers take a photo of his load for Chris and Ralph. Chris asked if he has a big cock. Brooke said it is big. Ronnie Puppet gave her some advice too.
Howard took a call from a woman who said that she has kids too and they will lock themselves in a closet or something to do it so the kids aren't in there. She said she's not sure about the heels either. Howard thanked her for the call and let her go.
Howard asked if Ralph is done with Aaron Carter's dick. Ralph said he's done. Chris said he was on there like an hour. He said he saw that hunk of meat and it was really exciting.
Howard took a call from a guy who was upset about Ralph calling in and changing the subject to huge cocks after talking to that woman. Howard said that's true. He said somehow they ended up talking about Aaron Carter's huge cock.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked how they let Ralph call in with the subject he called in about. Ralph said that he didn't bring it up. He said this is like a guy on Twitter who has no comprehension. He said he was talking to Howard about the woman. The caller said he's talking about it though. Ralph said Howard asked him about it.
Howard asked when Aaron is going to be on again. Ralph said that's a good question. Chris said he'll send Ralph a reminder when she finds out. Chris said he enjoyed the concert because he grew up with the guy. He said he knows his music. Howard said he's not sure why he'd want to see him nude though. Robin said Chris is into cock if he didn't know that.
Ralph asked if Aaron went from 0 to 60 and just went into jerking off. Chris said he doesn't know because he had to keep logging in to see what was going on.
Howard said whenever he jerks off on cam he makes sure he has a big load. He said he's older now and he barely has a load anymore.
Howard said Aaron carter's song peaked on the charts in 2000. He said for anyone who is gay they had some gay talk and some straight talk for the straight people out there.
Howard took a call from a guy who said they have to stop with the gay talk. He said he tunes in for Howard and the Ronnie stuff. Howard said they have to mix it up for everyone.
The caller had some advice for Brooke too. He told her to wear heels with no pants and no panties on so she can bend over and have her cookie wink at the guy. Howard thanked the guy for the call and wrapped up the show. Howard said they're going to talk to Jane Fonda tomorrow. He said she wrote a book about the environment. He said it's a great book. He got in another plug for Gardein before ending the show. He did his impression of his mom talking about eating meat during that commercial. Howard ended the show around 10:50am.
Howard started the show talking about how confused he is about what he's reading about the United States Postal Service this morning. He said he's very freaked out by it. He said he's reading that out in California they caught some dude who was dumping a bunch of mail in a garbage dump. He said he was a contractor for the Postal Service. He said that's really weird. He said he's not sure what's going on but this country is feeling more and more third world to him. He said then he saw the president was yelling at a reporter for wearing a mask. He said he's living in a bizzaro land. He said he's losing his mind being locked up in his house. He said his blood is boiling over all of this.
Howard said yesterday he was chatting with his psychiatrist and the time flew by. He said his therapist says he talks too much and doesn't think about things enough. He said he thought being on the phone with your therapist that you have to talk. He said he's doing it wrong apparently. He said no other patient does that. He said he'd imagine that Gary would though. He said he talks a lot.
Robin said Gary has been in therapy. Howard asked Gary if he talks too much. Gary said of course not. He said his therapist would never tell him he talks too much. Gary said he should fire his therapist. He said he's paying this guy to listen to him and he's telling him he talks too much? He said that's insane. Howard said that was very strange. Gary asked if he has ever thought that he pays the guy too much. Howard said he knows he's helping him so he doesn't think about the money. Gary said he's supposed to be there to talk so he doesn't understand. Howard said he's supposed to think about what he's talking about so now he stays quiet.
Howard said all of this has to be over at some point. He said it has to end. Gary asked if he thinks that he'll ever be cured. Howard said he's not sure there is a cure. He said it's a way of changing your patterns and becoming more comfortable in your own skin. He said that way you can cope better. Robin said it teaches you coping skills. Howard said he can be a better husband and father through therapy.
Howard said when he was sitting there thinking about the mail being fucked with. He said they used to attack the postal service and how it should be privatized. He said the postal service here used to be amazing. He said you judge a country by the postal service. He said you can't trust it now. He said he ordered a protein drink a few weeks ago and he hasn't seen it. He said it's been 3 weeks. He said it used to take 2 days. He said something is definitely up. Robin said it used to be that if it was in your city it would get there the next day.
Howard said Gary pays his bills through the mail. He said he does too. He said Gary said that he's been late because bills aren't coming in the mail. He said he's really concerned about this. He said he knows exactly what's going on but he's not going to get political.
Howard said he said 3 and a half years ago that this country would turn into a third world country and that's what's happening. He said he told you that the whole thing was going to fall apart. He said that the mail was purposely shut down. He said they don't allow overtime and they aren't delivering mail every day. He said he knows what's going on and it doesn't take brain power to see what's going on. He said the country is devolving into a nut job country.
Howard said if life was real and this was a company you'd have top management brought out and locked up in a straight jacket. He said that he knows what's going on and he sees what has happened in 4 years. He said there is racial unrest like they've never seen. He said there are people losing their jobs and environmentally we're fucked. He said your grandchildren won't see the light of day. He said somehow people are blaming Biden for this even though it's happening now. He said it's crazy.
Howard said he can't tell you how to vote or how to live but he's worried about his kids and their future. He said he is a patriot and loves this country so much. He said he used to be a beacon and a shining light. He said a lot of shit went down in the world's history and this country stepped up and helped to save the world. He said now we need saving.
Howard said the mail thing should bother you because people are going to have to vote through the mail. Robin said she's thinking of going in person no matter what she has to do. She said she may have to get into a HazMat suit. Howard said he may have to do the same.
Robin said she's happy that he's not watching Housewives or something. Howard said if he has two things to watch it's Beverly Hills Housewives on Wednesday night. He said he puts everything on hold when that's on. He said they're on Wednesday nights. He told Robin what's going on with that show. He went over what happened with Brandy and Denise Richards. Howard said it was very nice of Denise to take Brandy and eat her. He said then Brandy talks about her on the show and calls her out and now Denise has to try to explain that to her husband. Howard said he feels bad for Denise because she's married. He said she fucked up and Brandy should have kept her mouth shut.
Howard said Denise's husband seems like a hot head. He said he may not take that news well. Robin asked if he won't just sit and have a conversation about it. Howard said he's a good looking dude and he has a big penis according to her. He said imagine you cheat on your husband and the Yentas on that show are talking about it. He said they think she's lying when she denies it. He said she's on TV so of course she's lying about it. He said they should put all of them on a spaceship to Mars. He said that way he'd have the best of both worlds.
Howard said the women on that show are disgusting human beings. He said you wouldn't want to be friends with any of them. He said he loves watching them though. He said he loves them showing off their wealth and all of that. He said they go out and spend money on meaningless junk in Italy. He said they're obnoxious human beings. He said Denise lying about that affair is about the nicest thing they've done on that show. He said he can't stand them but he can't miss an episode.
Howard said he decided to take care of his own business for a few days to give Beth a break. He said he took a dump and then he decided to get everything out of himself. He said he doesn't get these religious people who are so against masturbating. He said that he was watching a porno with a step mom and step daughter. He said this girl was studying for a test and she's in panties and a t-shirt. He said the mom was telling the daughter to take a break and the mom kept interrupting her studies. He said the mom is in heels with her titties sticking out of her negligee. He said the mom is rubbing her shoulders and the daughter tells her it's inappropriate. He said they start making out and then they end up eating each other out. He said he likes this kind of porn. He said the embarrassing thing is that he came before they even stopped talking. He said he likes the setup. He said he won't watch a porn if they don't have a setup. He said they do some really disgusting things in these movies so he likes the story. Robin said these are all topics for his therapist. Howard said maybe he's talking about the wrong shit.
Howard asked how he can talk to his therapist about what he likes watching. He said in one he saw a mom teaching her daughter how to blow her boyfriend.
Howard said this motorcycle racer is a good looking guy. He said he's marrying his step sister. He said they look kind of like movie stars.
Howard read a story about a guy who was fucking his mother. He asked Robin what she would do if she walked in on something like that and you were married to the guy. Robin said she would walk out and leave. Howard said the wife actually called the police. He said he'd love to hear that 911 call. He said the last thing he'd do is call the cops over that. Howard talked about what that call might sound like. He said he'd pay good money to hear that.
Howard said the police came and the mom and son are facing incest charges. He said they face 20 years in prison for that. Howard said it's apparently an epidemic if they have laws on the books for that.
Howard said they asked the son why he had sex with his mom and he said ''It just happened.'' Howard said he can't believe that's a crime. He said he fucking his mom would be punishment enough. He did his impression of his mom talking to him if they were having sex.
Howard said in this picture of this guy who fucked his mom the guy is holding up a trophy. He said he'd love to know what that trophy was for.
Howard said he was wondering what the wife looked like. He said they say it started when they were watching videos of Aaron Carter jerking off.
Howard said his favorite story right now is a white Jewish woman has been pretending to be a black woman most of her life. He said the woman is a professor of African History at George Washington University. Howard said that's a good school. He said it's weird when people pretend to be black because they're going all out. He said it turns out this is a white, Jewish woman. He said there isn't anything black about her. He said they're tracing it now. He said her name is Jessica Krug. He said she's from Kansas and Jewish. He said he has tape of this woman.
Howard said this is from a virtual city council meeting in June. Howard played the clip and the woman had a Caribbean accent at first and that changed and kind of went away and changed to something sort of southern.
Howard said she's speaking Cardi B. Robin said don't even say that. She said Cardi is authentic. Howard said if someone called her out on that it would have been bad. He said she would have called them racist.
Howard said he would talk with a blackcent when he was growing up but he had to do that to survive. He said he had to plead for his life. He said he was bad at it too. He said he's not sure what's up with this white women. He said they're really into this role playing though. He said they become the heads of the things they go for. He said she's like Sacha Baron Cohen doing that accent. Robin said no one ever called her out on it and said she wasn't black.
Howard said these people are never just having a normal life. He said they have to be the top of their field. He wondered how she got that job. Robin said she'd like to know who hired her. Howard played the clip again and said he has no idea what she even said. He said she even starts cursing in the clip. Howard played the clip and tried to interpret what she was saying. He said he might be able to write a song to this. He said she might be saying her name at the start there. Robin said that might be her made up name. He said her real name is Jessica.
Robin asked where her family is. Howard said she missed her mom's funeral in 2013 because she didn't want people to know what she was up to. Robin said she wasn't able to do an African accent so she tried another.
Howard played the clip again and tried to interpret again. He said that has to be her name. He said it's like Justaba Malera. He said he can't even get past this first sentence. He said that department must be a joke over at George Washington. He said the other professors must be talking about her and how they can't understand a word she's saying. Howard said African people are asking what the fuck she's saying. Howard did an impression of her speaking with that weird accent.
Howard said she used the name Jess LaBombera. He said that's her fake name. He said in 2019 she was nominated for a Harriet Tubman award for a book she wrote. Howard said imagine that. Robin said they haven't interviewed any of them. She asked if any men are doing this. Howard said maybe they are but they're not getting jobs.
Howard played more of the clip and went through it trying to interpret what she was talking about. When he did figure it out he got a laugh out of what she was talking about. He said she's complaining about gentrification but she's a white woman complaining about it.
Howard said someone at George Washington University has to be embarrassed by hiring this woman. He played more of the clip and laughed when he heard Jessica cursing and complaining about her neighborhood being sold. He said they have a bad ass professor there.
Howard said she threw in a ''Y'all'' in there. He said now she's southern. He said she was from the Caribbean a minute ago. He laughed as she was complaining about her neighborhood and what's happening to it.
Robin asked if Howard thinks she's ever talked like this. Howard said when she gets worked up. He said he's not sure she's even black. Robin laughed. Howard said he's wise to her. He said he sees what's going on now. Robin said they have to be suspicious of everyone now.
Howard said Daniel Carver never believed Robin was black. He said he thought she was a racist white woman. Howard said the world is nuts. Robin said she wants to get off. She said she thinks they made a mistake when they dropped her there.
Robin said one of her friends was online and she found a date online. She said they're going out on dates now. She said she was wondering if Howard would be able to do that. Howard said he would if he was single. He said he'd have to. He said he told his wife he has no idea what he'd do without her. He said he needs someone to be there with him.
Howard said he would have an accelerated dating life. He said he'd go from a date to being married. He said he was single for a brief period.
Howard said this Lingua Franca shows that men can really look like women. He said that it's like the plant based food tasting like meat. Howard said someone said you have to turn on subtitles manually on Netflix to get them. Howard asked why he'd have to do that. Robin said sometimes you do see that. Howard said that's bullshit. He said tell him how to do it if he has to.
Howard asked Jason to find out what she said at the end of Lingua Franca. Jason said he has it up now if he wants to know. Howard said he'll find out later because people probably didn't watch it.
Howard took a call from a woman who said she has been listening overnight and she loves the show. She said she has to tell him that she tells everyone that she learns things from him. She said the most important is the Metamucil wafers. Howard said Dr. Agus told him about that. He said he had something going on when he had his colonoscopy and Dr. Agus told him to try this to prevent Diverticulitis. He said he was told to try Metamucil and he thought that was just for old people. He said that he loves the wafers. He said he used to squeeze out pellets but now he has a nice doody. He said it just slides right out with no effort.
Howard said he has a beautiful experience every day when he goes to the bathroom now. He said there's not even a lot of clean up. He said Metamucil is a great product. He said he even has a song about it. He played that for the caller.
Howard said there are two types of this stuff. He said he likes cinnamon spice and apple crisp. He said he can't eat the chocolate ones. He said he has the cinnamon every day even though he likes apple. He said the person who ordered it last had two choices and they got the wrong one. He said he doesn't believe in wasting money so he eats the cinnamon spice. He said he wants his apple crisp. Robin asked why he leaves this stuff to other people. Howard said that's a good question.
Gary said he started on the cinnamon spice wafers. He asked how long before he sees results because he just started yesterday. Howard said Gary eats a lot of shitty food so he might be different. He said it should be in a few days. He said he'll see a big difference soon. Robin said he had better drink a lot of water. Gary said he always does. Howard said Gary doesn't eat a lot of vegetables. He said he will advise him on what to take. Gary said that things weren't moving when he was on medication for his knee operation.
Howard said Gary will be in great shape after using Metamucil. He said he thinks it will help him. He said he's like a raccoon eating from the trash but it will help you.
Robin asked if Gary is backed up. Gary said about 10 days after the operation he was in the bathroom straining. He said his heart was pumping and it was really rough.
Howard asked how his new knee is. Gary said he has trouble walking up stairs and down. He said he has to go up one at a time. He said the left knee is healing and the right is getting worse. He said he can't exercise until November. He said he is getting better every day though. He said the operation was needed and it's phenomenal.
Robin said she saw a picture of Gary on a rock with his legs hanging over it and he had his knees hanging there. Gary said they went up to Maine and stayed at an Inn. Howard said he had no idea. Gary said he felt very comfortable up there. He said they were overboard with everything. He said they were distanced and the place wasn't full. He said he felt weird about taking the trip but it was fine when they got there.
Howard said Gary is considering moving to Maine. Gary said that Mary wants to go up there. He said they are thinking about moving up there. Robin said it gets cold up there. Gary said he knows. Howard said his cousins lasted a couple of years up there. He said they were hippies. He said he loves Maine too but it's not good in the winter. He said he's not going to want to be there in the winter. Gary said they probably wouldn't. He said they might have a place in Florida and one in Maine. He said they won't live in New York anymore. He said the kids will be wherever they are and they will move out of New York.
Howard said he saw Gary on Instagram telling people where he was and he spelled Maine ''Main.'' Gary said he did fix it. He said they were in an area that was like a 6.5 hour drive.
Howard took a call from a woman who said she has a story she thought he'd like. She said that she was out running and she had a gurgle in her stomach. She said she had no idea where to go and there were no bushes around. She said she had shorts on and this stuff was moving out. She said that it was dripping down her leg. Howard asked why she's thinking about him. The caller said she figured she could go to the dentist where she had just gone. Howard interrupted her and asked what this has to do with him. She said she's getting to that. The caller went on to talk about how she called her husband to come get her. She said he came and got her and he said he can't stay with a woman who shits her shorts. She said she blamed Howard Stern for it because she ate a bunch of Metamucil cookies. Howard asked how many she ate. She said they're really good. Howard said they're really powerful. He said be careful and talk to your doctor about it. He said that she might want to stick to a treadmill.
Howard said maybe eat your Metamucil after a run. He said he's getting nervous with that call so he has to go. He let her go after that.
Beth came back in and said she has to confess something. She said after they watched ''Away'' they went into his studio and she asked how he knew everything was working okay. She said she was deep cleaning in the studio and she was trying to be really careful and she knocked this whole thing over. She said she started scrubbing it the sign says do not use cleaner on it. She said she didn't sleep a whole night. She said she wasn't sure if she should tell him about it or not. She said she was so freaked out. Howard said she should have told him. He asked if she doesn't tell him things. Beth said of course she doesn't.
Howard said she's doing him a huge favor by cleaning that stuff. Beth said she's not sure she would confess to that if it didn't work. Howard said she has to tell him things like that. Beth said she doesn't want to talk about this off the air. Howard said that's ridiculous that she wouldn't tell him. He said he wouldn't be mad at her. Beth said she wasn't being careful. She said her friend told her to call Gary about it. Howard said she has to tell him things like that. Beth ran off again.
Howard asked Beth to come back. He said she sounds like a hostage there. He said he wants to say something. Howard asked Beth what was going on with that. Beth said she's mad at herself for not telling him. Howard said he's not looking to sit there all day. He asked how their friends think that she's being held hostage. He said that their friends think that he's holding her back from going out. He said he wants her to tell people that it's not him. Beth said they made a pact that they aren't going to go out until there is a vaccine. Beth said she is going to get her hair cut and colored on Sunday. Howard said he is too. Beth said she thinks if they're careful they'll be okay. She said that Howard is nervous about it and she's not. Howard said he doesn't want to go out because of COVID-19. Beth said they are being safe and they think they're doing the right thing. Robin said that sounded very well rehearsed. Beth said that's funny.
Howard said he's not sure why she's getting her hair colored anyway. He said he likes it the way it is. Beth said she likes it blonde. Howard said he's afraid that she's going to get COVID and he'll get it from her. Robin said there's nothing to worry about. She was about to say something else but stopped herself.
The caller asked what part of Maine he'd want to live. Gary said Camden. He said he doesn't need this house he's in now. He said the kids are grown and they're going to be okay with the college stuff. He said they can get two small houses and live between them. He said there's no way he's spending winter up in Maine. He said he's too old for that. He said Mary wants to get a fixer upper but he's too old for that too. He said he just wants to move into a turnkey house and it's over. He said he's not going to live in an apartment either.
Howard said how about move to Alabama with Shuli. Gary said his wife wont even consider Florida. Howard said he understands that. He said we'll see what happens. Howard said everyone is moving out. He said we'll see how it all goes.
Howard said a lot of people are writing him about Shuli's move. He read some of that feedback about him moving to Alabama and people were happy for him. Howard said it's fine but he has a job there in New York. He said he thinks his plan is to just come to New York and leave the family in Alabama. He said he'll have a bachelor pad in New York.
Howard said Steve Nowicki just said he's moving to Iraq. He said you can get 300 acres for like 11 bucks.
Howard said he knows what Shuli is up to. He said he can't move everyone back. Shuli said if it comes to that they'll see. He said he's not keen on ditching them necessarily. Howard read more fan feedback about Shuli. Howard said someone wrote in about his calls to Underdog. Shuli said he's supposed to talk to her today actually. Howard said this news is going to freak her out. Shuli did his impression of her for a short time. They played a song parody about his move too.
Howard read more about the move and people were asking about why he'd move there if they're weed unfriendly. Shuli said he didn't base the move on weed laws. He said it's all good.
Howard said that SiriusXM may do a regional adjustment to his salary. Shuli said that's not happening. Howard said they could pay him like he lives there. Shuli said there are people making good money out there. Howard said Shuli loves it down there. He said he's like a white person who decides to become black. He said he's all in. Shuli said next week he'll have spurs and boots on.
Howard said people were going off on him for the way he treated Shuli. He said all he did was ask questions. He said he's sure it's nice down there. He said he wishes Shuli luck there. He said he's not his father. He said sometimes he feels like he is though.
Howard said Shuli probably just went alphabetically to find a place to live. He said that the kids probably have their own bedrooms now. He said there in New York they had to share. Shuli said they have two kids and two kittens and a dog. Howard said he would love to see how he chose Alabama. Shuli said his wife was very quiet at first. He said now she's fine. Howard said it must be warm down there. Shuli said the kids are having a blast in the yard and riding bikes around. Howard said they'll have to see how it goes. He said that they may come up with a cure for COVID. Shuli said they'll see what happens then. Howard said Shuli's thinking is always rational. He said he trusts it.
Shuli said he didn't tell High Pitch Erik that he was moving. He said he thinks he's upset with him. He said he won't return his calls now. Howard said when people are left behind grey have a strange reaction. He said even they're having a hard time with it.
Shuli said Erik called him during the break and said he can't believe he moved. He said eventually Erik will drive up there. Howard said of course he will.
Howard said he's closer to Bobo now. He said he might not be that well off the closer he gets to Bobo.
Howard said they got a lot of fan feedback about the Chris Wilding and Ralph story yesterday. He said that people think that this is more evidence that Ralph is a homosexual.
Howard said while they were on vacation grey had their 4th annual phony phone a thon. He said it was great. He said they have so many phony phone calls that grey played over 150 phony calls over Labor Day weekend. He said they were very proud of that. He said a high percentage of them were from the Jack and Rod Show series. He said that's Sal and Richard's fake radio show. Howard played some examples of their phony calls to guests on the Jack and Rod Show.
Howard said he has a new Jack and Rod call. He said grey boys booked a nutritionist and told him that the show was about home fitness during quarantine. He said they had Arnold Schwarzenegger as a guest. He said they knew he likes wild animals so they had them go nuts during the interview. Howard played a clip from that call. Howard said later in the call he says he drinks donkey piss. He said this guy would not get off the phone with the Jack and Rod Show. He said that's why he's playing it in clips. He played the part where Arnold talks about drinking the piss. The nutritionist stays on and keeps talking to Fake Arnold.
Howard said this thing was a saga. He said the idea is to do something so stupid that the person hangs up. He said this guy would not hang up. Howard said Fake Arnold said he drinks his own urine and that didn't bother the guy either. He played a clip. Howard said you'd think the guy would be suspicious when things happen as Arnold is saying it.
Howard said this guy would not hang up. He said they had to end this somehow so they had Arnold getting raped by his donkey. He said the guy stayed on and that was 40 minutes into the call. Howard said some people don't get upset. Robin said a celebrity can get away with anything.
Howard said Sal and Richard say that sometimes they go weeks without doing a long phony phone call because people hang up so quickly. He said they went an hour into this call. He said eventually Fake Arnold jerked off a possum and the guy finally said he was going to hang up. Howard played a clip from that moment. The guy was still talking to Arnold but he eventually hung up. Howard said that was an hour in.
Robin said that guy gave them permission to play that. Howard said yeah. He said the guy who was doing the Arnold impression was working overtime. He said Richard and Sal will stay on with you as long as it takes. He said they have nothing better to do.
Howard said he thinks Ronnie is still voting for Trump. He said he hasn't indicated anything else. Howard asked Ronnie is if he is. Ronnie said he doesn't know what he's doing anymore. Howard asked if he knows how he's voting. Ronnie said as far as he's concerned they all suck. He said he hasn't decided yet. Robin said you can't believe that they don't know. Howard said ''I don't know'' means he doesn't want to say. Howard asked how you don't know at this point. He said if you're a trump person you know it. He said if you can't stand him then you know what you're going to do. Ronnie said he's disappointed in a lot of shit that's happened. Howard asked who he's voting for. Ronnie said he doesn't know yet. Howard said that's bullshit. He said he knows who he's voting for. Ronnie said he doesn't know yet.
Howard asked Ronnie puppet who he's voting for. He said he's going to flip for it. Howard said he has to know. Ronnie said he doesn't know who to vote for. Ronnie said that Biden isn't going to be president. He said his Vice President is going to be President. Howard said if he thinks Biden is senile then he is voting for Trump. Ronnie said he may not vote. Howard said just admit he's voting for Trump. Ronnie said he's not sure yet. He said he's being totally honest. Howard asked why he wouldn't vote for Trump. Ronnie said look at what's going on around there. Howard asked if he would rather have a senile guy or a guy who can't run the country as President. Ronnie said he has no idea. Howard asked if he has heard Biden speak rationally. Ronnie said he has but sometimes he has no idea where he even is.
Howard said Shuli thinks he's not voting for Trump. Shuli said he gets Ronnie's argument. He said both sides are extreme. He said that they both have a part in the way this country is right now. Howard said he's just trying to get his finger on the pulse of the country. He said now he knows what they're thinking. Robin said the country needs CPR. She said we need to be reawakened. Howard said he has to take a break. Ronnie Puppet said if Kamala Harris dresses sexy then he'll vote for her. Howard said people were talking about Ronnie being so honest yesterday about what he's going through during the pandemic. He said that he thinks Ronnie isn't being honest today. Ronnie said he is being honest. He said he doesn't know who he's voting for. He said he's afraid to vote for anyone at this point. Howard said they have to take a break and get to Jane Fonda. They went to break after that.
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Howard came back and said he thinks he saw his dad getting a boner during the movie Barberella. He said that really messed with his head. He said his dad as fantasizing about Jane Fonda. He said that was his fantasy too. He said that he should go back and watch that movie. Robin said he might have a different experience now. Howard said that he was about 14 years old when that movie came out.
Howard said Jane looks fantastic today. Jane said that's what quarantine can do for you. Howard said he was watching Jane on TikTok. He said he was thinking about her and how the last time she was there a few days later she announce she's done with men. He said that's a waste. Jane said she really is. Howard said he would think that things would work out with them if they dated.
Howard asked how she's doing with this COVID thing. Jane said she's staying in. She said she has a concrete bunker where she lives and she turned it into a studio. Howard asked if she's a survivalist. Jane said she's not. She said she had a safe room in two other houses. She said that when she was married to Tom Hayden they had a safe room. She said they were fire proof and bullet proof. Howard said they were targets. Howard asked if they ever had to use them. Jane said they didn't. She said they were the size of small closets so grey weren't going to last long. She said that it was Tom's idea to have them. She said it never would have occurred to her to have one.
Howard asked if it would be hard for a man to be married to her. He said he'd want her with him all the time if they were married. Jane said he's too late. She said before it would have been fine. She said that if she was married to him before she would become whoever he wanted her to. Howard said that doesn't fit her M.O. He said that he didn't think she was like that. Jane said she was good at it. She said she suffered from a disease to please as Oprah calls it. Jane said when you're sexually abused a girl feels that the only thing that matters is her sexuality and she has to please. She said the concept of ''no'' is gone. She said that there's a lot of self hatred and you fit in with who the person wants you to be. She said there's a lot of trauma related to that.
Howard said he fears for every young woman out there. He said he doesn't know any woman who wasn't abused. Jane said every one of her friends was. She said it's also incest. Howard asked if that's what she had. Jane said no. Howard said her mom died early and if you don't have a mom you're basically an orphan. Jane said you become your own parent. She said if you're smart and resilient then you are. Howard asked if she hates her father for not protecting her. Jane said no. She said he was overseas in the Navy. Howard asked who was watching her then. Jane said in her class they were called Governesses. She said they were nannies. Howard asked if she was someone she could turn to. Jane said not at all. She said some can be someone like that but she had many over her life. She said they had a lot of nannies and they didn't get close to them.
Howard asked about her father and Jane told him that he went to fight in the war because he had great values. She said this was the second world war. Howard asked how old he was when he enlisted. Jane said she was 4 or so and he must have been in his 30s. Howard said that's why he admires her. He said she could have been in any film but she protested the Vietnam war. He said she is her father's daughter. Jane said millions of people protested that war. Howard said that she could have avoided it. He said that most people don't take a stand. He said there are tons of people who won't take a stand. Jane said there are many who do. She said that we only need 11.5 million to take the stand. She said we can do that.
Howard asked Jane why she still cares so much when she's gone through so much. Jane said that she spent the first third of her life not really caring. She said she was kind of cynical and she wasn't paying attention. She said she didn't really care. Howard asked if she just wanted to be an actress. Jane said she didn't know. She said she was married to Roger and she just fit into his life. She said when she found out about the Vietnam war she came back and became part of the anti-war movement. She said she was working with the soldiers and she met people who she didn't know and they saw the world differently.
Howard said that Jane was arrested for carrying vitamins with her when she came back into the country and she was arrested because of Nixon. Jane said when she became an activist it was like sinking into a warm bath. She said these people were living their values and she knew why she was alive. She said it gave her a reason to be. She said there is nothing more beautiful in life than knowing you have a purpose.
Howard asked if her past life as an actress was meaningless when she came to that realization. Jane said there was a point when she had been an activist for a couple of years and she was working with soldiers and auto workers and this friend of her's named Ken Cockril told her that they didn't have movie stars as activists so she had to make her career matter to the movement. She said that's when she started producing her own movies like ''Coming Home'' and ''China Syndrome.'' She said that made a lot of difference to her.
Howard asked what movie she worked with Jon Voight in. It was Coming Home. Howard asked if she's in touch with him now. She said she's not and it's very sad what happened to him. She said he was her best friend for a time. She said they were close and she's not sure what happened to him. Jane said that Jon changed into an extreme right winger. Howard said that guy fascinates him. He said he's a huge talent. Jane said he is but something changed. Howard said he's got a lot of right wing views. Howard asked if she could be friends with a guy like that. Jane said no and not with anyone who was part of the birther movement. She said she's not sure how people who are so far apart politically can even live together. Howard said just look at Kellyanne Conway. Jane said they must have really good sex.
Howard asked if sex can keep a couple together. Jane said it can. She said she read somewhere that being good in the feathers can keep you together. Howard said that can be true.
Howard said he was reading her new book (What Can I Do?: My Path from Climate Despair to Action) and it made him so sad. He said he's happy that she's still around and still cares. He said that he imagines that she's going to give up at some point but she cares so much. He said he thinks that we are killing the planet and there is no bigger issue. He said he has a friend that has a 2 month old and he has the feeling that this kid won't be around because of the way we're treating the planet.
Howard said Jane talks about the oceans and how they give us breathable air. He said we're trolling the oceans and pull everything up with these giant ships. He said that she talks about how there are no more male sea turtles because the sea temperatures are rising. Howard said she describes in detail how screwed this planet is. He said he read this and lost hope. He said we have to do something and that's what she says in this book.
Jane said the scientists are telling us these terrible things that are happening and we can make the changes in time but we have to start right now. Jane said that's why she wrote this book and why she does her Firedrill Fridays. Howard asked if she sees any evidence that there are any initiatives. Jane said here are some. Howard said it looks like it's Doomsday if you ask him. Jane said it looks that way but there are changes happening around the world. She said in Germany they have retrained 20,000 coal workers to work in other jobs. He said there are things happening. Howard asked if she has spoken to Biden. Jane said she has not. Howard said he thinks that he will take things seriously. Jane said he has taken the environment very seriously over the past year. She said that he is a moderate and we have to make that happen. She said we need millions of people to push him to do more. She said that he is hesitant to say we have to stop with fossil fuels. Jane said 40 years ago they were studying the atmosphere and they told the fuel makers that the atmosphere is warming up because of the burning of fossil fuels. She said they didn't stop and it gets worse and worse. Jane said we have very little time to cut the emissions in half before it's too late. She said there are other problems too like chopping down the forests to raise cattle and things like that. She said it's primarily the fossil fuel thing that we have to cut back on. She said if they continue to drill for oil we're not going to make it.
Howard asked Jane to talk about the military and how we have to take some of the money that goes to them and use it to fight to clean up this mess we're in. Jane said the economists say that it would cost in the trillions to do it but it would pay itself back quickly. She said it makes a lot of sense to cut the budget. She said that even if we cut billions out we'd be on a level of other countries combined. She said stop paying the fossil fuel companies billions a year. She said if we stop shoring them up and put money toward them then we can start moving to solar energy and things like that. She said we can do it and make it work. Jane said we need someone who isn't afraid to make changes. She said we can shore up our health care and do all of this.
Howard asked why so many people in this country think people like her are kooks. He said they have this attitude that she's full of shit. He asked why so many people are anti-science. Jane said there are some people they're never going to convince. She said when you canvass and knock on doors you know when you're not going to get through to someone. She said there are some people who have drunk the Kool-Aid. She said then you try to tell them something they don't know and you can make a difference. She said you have to make people care about it.
Howard said they have to get people to care about it now. He said things are changing with the oceans and the temperatures are changing. He said this pandemic came from someone eating a bat apparently. He asked what the world is going to look like in 30 or 40 years. Jane said he has described a lot of it. She said oxygen will be a problem. She said clean water will be more and more scarce around the world. She said by 2050 there will be 200 million climate refugees. Howard asked where they're going to go. Jane said there will be problems surviving hurricanes and extreme weather events that won't let you recover from the last. She said that people will get sick a lot more and the health care system won't be able to handle it. She said the economy won't be able to handle it and the economy will collapse. She said even the rich people who live on hills or on yachts will be affected.
Howard said he was impressed in her new book that she was talking about protesting and going to Washington DC to do that. He said she described a scene where the police officer had to push her into a van and pushed her on her ass. He said it's so degrading that she had to be pushed into the van. He said it's amazing to him that she still cares so much at her age. He said some people in their 80s wont even walk outside. Jane said there were so many old women there. She said they're leading the charge. She said that's true globally. Jane said that she's 82 an people see that she can do it so they want to do it too.
Jane said she loves her book because it's so joyful. Howard said he loved the book. Jane said she hopes that she can have few regrets when she dies. She said she wants to think that she had a meaningful life. She said that she would hate herself if she didn't do what she's doing. She said you have to plan for how you want to be and how you want to feel when you get to the end. Jane said her father had a lot of regrets. She said that she's being very selfish there. Howard asked what his regrets were. Jane said that he didn't resolve everything that he wanted to before he died. She said she could see it in his face. She said we have to live with the intention to make up everything and go out with as much peace and grace as possible. She said if you don't try to make things right you will have regrets and bad feelings when you get older.
Jane said she wasn't happy before going to Washington DC. She said she didn't feel like she was doing enough. Howard said she's right. He said when she does die she's definitely going to heaven. He said he read that she adopted a kid. He said he doesn't know what happened to the parents. Jane said that's Lulu. She said her parents were Black Panthers and they were not able to take care of her. She said that she and Tom Hayden took her in. She said that they had a lot of different kinds of kids at their camp and Lulu was one of them. She said that she didn't legally adopt her but she is part of her family. She said she's now working with the Red Cross and helping with the victims of the latest hurricane. She said she is an amazing human being. Howard said that's an amazing tribute to her as a mother. He said not everyone can take on a job like that. Jane said he's focusing on the kids who drop out and don't get involved. She said she focuses on the kids who don't. She said she thinks young people today are amazing. She said they're so brave, smart and organized.
Howard said in her book she talks a lot about Greta Thunberg. He said she says that she really woke her up. Howard said she is an amazing kid and he agrees with her on that. He said that she's screaming that the environment is caving in. He said Jane says that she woke her up. Jane said she has Aspergers and she focuses on things like a laser beam. She said she knows about it because of that. She calls that her superpower and she agrees. Jane said that she couldn't understand what was going on based on what she was finding out. She said when she heard about that she knew she had to get out there and do something.
Howard asked Jane about how she is such a good mother after she grew up the way she did. Howard said he doesn't understand how she got that information and figured it out. Jane said her dad did a lot of great movies and she loved him so she knew that was how you're supposed to be. She said she wasn't that way but she knew that's how she was supposed to be. She said she was born with resilience. She said she thinks you're born with that. She told Howard what she thinks a resilient person is. She said she was born that way and no matter what came at her she was able to bounce back. She said her problem was that she didn't pay much attention for the first 30 years of her life. She said she is the way she is now because for 30 years she didn't care that much about anything.
Howard said men would fawn all over her and she knows that. Howard said he read about how she wanted to be with Marvin Gaye. He asked where that was. Jane said it was Maureen Dowd who did that interview. Howard said he imagines that everyone must have kissed her ass in high school. He said she was famous and a beauty. Jane said it wasn't like that at all. She said the thing is that it doesn't matter what you look like or anything like that. She said if you were made to not feel good enough by being told that you're not beautiful or you're too fat then you're going to grow up that way. Howard asked if she looked in a mirror and saw an ugly girl. Jane said she did. Howard said his wife is like that. Jane said Marilyn Monroe was like that too. She said she recognized that in her and Marilyn recognized it in her too. She said Marilyn didn't have the resilience like she did.
Jane said Marilyn would sit in acting class with her and shake because she was so nervous. She said she never got up and acted in the class. She said Lee Strassberg was the teacher and she's not sure what he told her but he didn't make her act in class.
Jane said she would talk to Marilyn at times. She said that she came to a party at Lee's house once and men started to hyper ventilate and shake. She said she walked straight to her and started talking to her. She said she felt a kinship and felt safe with her. She said she was very touched by that. She said the reality is that it matters how you were made to feel when you were young. She said that the scars can stay with you unless you work to heal them.
Howard asked how Jane got to be who she is after being married to Roger Vadim who turned her into a sexual object. He asked how you make the move from that person to who she is today. He said it's an amazing leap. Jane said it's baby steps. She said the big leap was leaving France and coming back here to be part of the anti-war movement. Jane said she had some women she looked to. She said they were organizers. She said they're not even names you'd know.
Howard said she's had some life. He asked if she has any regrets. Jane said she tries to learn from her mistakes and move forward. She said she doesn't spend time thinking about regrets.
Jane said she wants to talk about her book (What Can I Do?: My Path from Climate Despair to Action). She said she moved to Washington to do something. She said she was going to move there and camp out in front of the White House for a year but she wasn't able to get a year off from Grace and Frankie on Netflix. She said she shortened that whole thing. Jane said she wasn't sure where she would poop if she had camped out.
Howard said we have to do something because all of these species are dying because of the environment. Howard said he was reading the book and it's a great call to arms. He said it's called ''What Can I Do?: My Path from Climate Despair to Action'' and he wants to know what she thinks we have to do. He asked what she would want people to do if she was in charge. Howard said most people have no nerve to go camp out in front of the White House. Jane said you can't camp out anymore. She said she would have gone to jail permanently if she had done it. She said some people suggested doing it just once a day and that's what she calls Firedrill Friday now.
Howard said he's impressed with the whole book and he was thinking about her yesterday. He said he has one of these Peloton bikes. He said he wasn't going to work out because he was tired. He said he thought about what Jane would do. He said she would get on that bike so that's what he did. Jane said she has a trainer and they work out with masks and gloves on. Howard asked if she has anyone at her house. Jane said she has an assistant during the week. She said she and her assistant sheltered there for a month and a half. She said someone they knew got sick but it wasn't COVID. She said that she has a home and a roof over her head so it's not as hard on her as it is for millions of others. Howard asked if she's lonely. Jane said not at all. She said she never gets lonely or bored.
Howard asked what she's doing to take up the time. Jane said getting ready for her Firedrill Fridays takes time. She said she has to do a lot of reading.
Howard asked how she's going to go back to work. Jane said she's going back in January for Grace and Frankie. Howard asked how they're going to do that. He said they had to shut down Batman because Robert Pattinson got sick. Jane said they will have to follow the protocols they have put in place. Howard said don't do it. He said she can't get COVID. He said he doesn't want her walking around on the set. He said he'll shoot her an email. Jane said she's glad he cares. She said Howard took her out to dinner and that was the best restaurant. She said she will come to visit him at home some day. Howard asked if she lets anyone in her home. Jane said she has. She said they wear masks and they eat at the opposite ends of the table. She said Darrell Hammond is one who came over. She said they did a podcast together. She said she saw the documentary about him called Cracked Up and she was so touched by him. She said he was stuck out there and she felt he was lonely so she had him over for dinner. She said they got along very well. Howard asked if she's in a romance with him. Jane said she's not in a romance with anyone.
Howard said he thinks they would have made a good couple. Jane said if he had said that to her before she had closed up shop she would have been right over. Howard said that's amazing. He said he had no idea. He knew that she liked him. He said imagine if Jane Fonda became Jane Stern.
Jane said that she could have said that Trump is all his fault. Howard asked how that is. Jane said she saw Rachel Maddow's interview with Michael Cohen and Michael was talking about how when Trump ran for president he never expected to win. He said it was to boost his brand. Howard said that's true. Jane said Howard gave him that bit of advice to run for president. Howard said he did. He said he was at Mar-A-Lago and he told him to do that. He said he knows the guy who told him to do that to promote his first book. He said the guy told him to pretend to run. He said the book became a best seller. He said it generated headlines and he sold books. He said the second time was when NBC was balking at giving him more money to do The Apprentice. He said Trump ran as a goof and it was never about caring about the country. He said it was a publicity stunt. He said everyone bought into it. He said Trump was his best radio guest. He said he was a good showman. He said he doesn't think putting him on the air caused him to be president. He said it's deeper than that. He said he won't accept blame for that.
Howard asked Jane about getting on the Hollywood walk of fame and how Jim Carrey showed up. Jane said she loves Jim so much. She said he touches her so much. Howard asked how they became friends. Jane said she has seen him for a long time. She said they became friends and her granddaughter would see him and it would make her very happy. She said she asked him over and he came so it was great for her. Howard said Jim is like that. He said there was a point when he and Jim wrote each other a lot. He said then he disappeared. Jane said he's so profound.
Howard asked what's going on with her and weed. Jane said her doctor told her to stop taking valium and start smoking weed to get sleep. She said there's a weed that will put you to sleep. Howard asked if she's in touch with her ex-husband Ted Turner. Jane said she is but he's suffering from Lewy Bodies disease. Howard said that's what Robin Williams had. Jane said it is but he's doing okay. Howard said he was such a vital guy. Jane said he's one of the most interesting human beings. She asked if he ever interviewed him. Howard said he never did. Jane said that would have been an amazing interview. She said next time they get together she'll have to tell him some Ted stories.
Howard asked if Ted is out of it. Jane said not at all. She said that what he can do has been diminished. Howard asked if she still loves him. Jane said she does. Howard asked how you have no bitterness from that. Jane said she has wonderful loving feelings for all the men she has been married to. Howard said she must hate someone. Jane said she has purged all hate. She said she learned from a man named Father Greg Boyle that bad deeds are the language of the traumatized and you can't hate the person. She said if you do hate the person then that person wins. She said she doesn't even hate Trump but she has had to fight that hard. Jane said she hates what he has done to this county and what she thinks he'll do to it if he's elected again. She said we're going to lose democracy if he gets elected again.
Howard asked what she thinks about the mail being dumped into the garbage heap. Jane said that those stories are being hyped. She said the republican party is doing that to give you doubt about mailing in your vote. She said the truth is you can mail in your vote but vote early and have someone who can take your ballot to a secure drop box. She said they feel confident about it but there are things being done to win the election.
Howard said she has him thinking about it. He said that if you look at it like these people are traumatized children then it changes your viewpoint. Jane said there are people who should be put on trial for crimes. She said Dick Cheney and people like that is who she's referring to.
Howard said Jane continues to inspire him. He said that she's doing these things on Fridays and Ted Danson is working with her. He said that she talked about how in certain parts of the ocean are to remain untouched but people go in there anyway. Jane said they have special satellites that show if they go to illegal places to fish and they can be arrested for that. Howard said that gave him a lot of hope. Howard said there's a lot to talk about with her. Howard asked if she's going to go back to sleep now. Jane said she is going to have breakfast and then she's doing the Today Show. Howard asked what she will have for breakfast. She said she'll probably have a peach smoothie.
Jane asked Howard what he eats. Howard told her and she said that's exactly what Ted eats. Howard said ''Uh oh.'' Howard said he eats the same thing every day. Jane said that's very healthy and that's fabulous. Howard said she is amazing. Jane said she'll see him when the pandemic is over. Howard said they'll talk about her ex-husbands when she comes over.
Jane thanked Howard for having her on the show. Howard said he's not done yet. He gave her a plug for her book and said she's trying to tell you to get off your fat ass and do something. Jane said start with voting.
Howard asked who the photos are on her wall. Jane went through some of them and she said one of them is Harvey Milk. She said that's one of them. Howard said he was an amazing guy. She had Gloria Steinem, Rosa Parks, Caesar Chavez, Jodi Foster, her dad and more. Howard said he will send her a photo of himself for that wall. Jane said she'll put that up on her hero wall. Howard said that would be great. Howard gave her more plugs for the book and wrapped up with her. He said they'll talk again sometime. Jane said they will. She thanked Howard and Robin again. Howard let her go after that.
Howard said Jane looks good. Robin said she looks great. She said she wouldn't camp out when she was a teen and Jane wanted to do it at 82. Howard said if you told him that Barberella would be into him some day he wouldn't have been able to leave the room. He said he'd be jerking off so much that he'd never leave the room. Howard said he wishes his dad was still with it so he could tell him this news.
Howard said he called his mother the other night. He reenacted the call where she was asking him if this is really Howard. Howard said he asked her to explain something to his dad. Howard got his dad on the line and told him that Jane Fonda is into him. He had his mom telling his dad the news.
Howard said his dad is so old that he doesn't talk much. He said that it must be his hearing and all of that. Robin asked if it ever gets better. Howard said no.
Howard took a call from a guy who said what a revelation it was that Jane has a thing for him. Howard said she's just being kind. Robin said she doesn't think she was lying about that. She thinks she feels very warmly toward Howard. The caller said this is great that he picked up on him. The caller had some kind words for him but Howard had no idea what he said. Robin said she didn't either. She said it was confusing.
Howard got in a plug for Zip Recruiter who sponsored the show today. Robin said it was great to have Jane Fonda on today. Howard said that was very special. He said read that book. He said it's really good. He said it's really fucked up what's going on with the country right now.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he moved from New York and down south. He said he wanted to talk about Shuli. He said they moved in 2017 because of the cost of living. He said they found living in the Nashville area that they're not welcoming to people who come from New York or L.A. He said they think of it as a liberal invasion. He said they think you're bringing in your liberal values to their area. He said Shuli being Jewish in a Waspy area he's probably going to want to move back or to an area where they're more welcoming. Howard said that he did find that an odd move. He said the places to live are cheaper for a reason. Robin said he may take a Jon Voight turn and become really conservative.
Howard said Shuli did say that the comedy scene is something down there. The caller said he'll find pockets of that down there but Alabama is as red as you can get. He said no one wears fucking masks down there. He said we have to take this pandemic seriously.
Howard said maybe Shuli will find some Alabama Wack Packers for him. Robin said they one thing they didn't talk about today was the death of Chadwick Boseman. She said he played Black Panther and he was only 43. Howard asked what he died from. Robin said he had colon cancer and battled it for 4 years. She said he had stage 3 and progressed to stage 4. She said it took him out while they were on vacation. Robin said that he made 4 movies while he was being treated. Howard said with colonoscopies they can get in there and catch this stuff. He said most doctors will tell you to get checked. Robin said they start you at 50. Howard said if he was in his position he never would have known. He asked if you should start at 30. He asked at what point you start doing it. Robin said she thinks Katie Couric's husband wasn't that old either. Howard said right. He said why not start at 35 or 40. Robin said she doesn't know.
Howard said Ronnie is 70 and he hasn't had a colonoscopy yet. Howard said he won't get one no matter what. He was about to ask him about it but changed his mind. Robin said Chadwick did incredible work while he was going through treatments. She said one actor who worked with him on a set came forward and said they felt so bad about what they thought about him while grey were working with him because he was getting massages and foot rubs. She said the person thought stardom had gone to his head. Now he realizes that he was going through this whole thing.
Howard said Jon Hein's doctor told him that they should start getting colonoscopies at 40. He said he thinks the doctor just wanted to get into Jon's ass. Robin asked if he has scene that ass. Howard said he sure has.
Howard asked Ronnie if this changes his thoughts on colonoscopies. Ronnie said he sort of got one. He said he got that new test that they do. Robin asked if that's the shit in the box test. Ronnie said that's it. Howard said it's not the same thing. Ronnie said they say it's pretty accurate. He said he's as clear as can be. Howard asked if he shit in a box. Ronnie said he did and he brought it to the UPS store and sent it back.
Howard asked Ronnie Puppet if he shit in a box. The puppet said Stephanie stuck a Nest camera up his ass.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that interview with Jane really changed his perspective on the President's views on science. Howard said this woman has done a lot of research. He said if you have kids you have to think about it. He said we could save the planet if we start now. He said there really are steps we can take but there are people who are anti-science and don't believe it. Robin said they believe god will take care of everything for them. Howard said the book is worth reading. He said it's really a good book. The caller said she's awesome. Howard said she really is.
Howard took a call from a woman who asked him to please let people answer questions when he asks them something. She said he talks over them a lot. Howard said he's sorry if he did. He said sometimes it's difficult to read the situation on camera. He said you want to keep it moving. He said he apologizes if he did that. He said he tried to keep it moving along.
The caller asked if he has tried to get Joe Biden on Zoom. Howard said there may have been conversations. He said he would love to talk to Joe. The caller said that he changed a lot of people's minds on Hillary when he talked to her so that might be a good idea.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he wanted to switch to a serious topic. He asked if he's going to beat off thinking about Jane Fonda being into him. Howard said he can't beat off to thoughts. He said he has to beat off to something visual. He said the days of him sitting there with his eyes closed are gone. He said porn has destroyed his sense of imagination.
Howard said when she was 12 or 13 there was no porn. He said he had to think about Honey West or Ann Francis. He said he had to think about the girl from Gilligan's Island. He said he was into Tina Louise. He said he would beat off to her thinking about her being into him. He said he was young and had a lot of loads. He said now he can't create this time machine and think about them both in their 20s. He said he's not going to go through that trouble.
Howard said he would think about Tina Louise in a coconut bra like she wore on Gilligan's Island. He said he'd go to his bedroom and rub his tiny penis like it was firewood. He said he'd jackhammer away on it. Howard said she's 86 years old now. Robin said she's not sure how old Ann Francis is now. Howard said he's not sure if she's even alive. Howard said that's how men used to do it in his day.
Howard said one day he was jerking off to Tina Louise and Gilligan came on the screen just as he was finishing. Howard said kids don't know how good they have it today.
Howard said Mr. Howell was the voice of Mr. Magoo. He said that always fascinated him. He said he loved that show. He said he's watching the original Lone Ranger now. He asked if Robin knows how he got his horse. Robin said she doesn't know. Howard said the Lone Ranger was a ranger and didn't wear a mask. He was just a ranger. Robin said he wore a badge. Howard said the guy wore stretch pants so tight that you could see his asshole. He said the guy was kind of chubby. Robin said it was before spandex so she's not sure how they got it so tight.
Howard went through the story about how this guy Cavendish got a guy to lead the rangers into an ambush and they killed every ranger but one. Robin said he was in bad shape though. Howard said he was hurt and dying. He said then this Tonto guy came around and found him. He said he helped this guy and Tonto was such a good dude that he buried the rangers and the Lone Ranger comes around and finds Tonto. He said everyone calls Tonto a ''filthy Injun'' and the Lone Ranger ends up teaming up with him. He said he doesn't have a horse so they have to go find one. He said they see a white horse laying on the ground. He said it's all white. He said a buffalo is about to kill it and the Lone Ranger shoots the buffalo to save the horse. Howard said Tonto wanted to kill the horse but the Lone Ranger wanted to save it. He said he helps the horse out and then the horse gets up and runs off. He said the horse eventually comes back and it's trained by the Lone Ranger. He said he names it Silver. He said then the two of them go after the gang.
Robin said the two of them beat the gang somehow. Howard said the Lone Ranger's thing is that they think he's dead. He said Tonto digs a fake grave for him and all. He said then the Lone Ranger puts on a mask to hide his identity. He said they called him the Lone Ranger but he was with Tonto all the time. He said it's like he's not even there. He asked what the fuck. He said it's so fucked up.
Howard took a call from Jon Hein audio book who filled them in on the background of Gilligan's Island. The guys had audio of Jon talking about Gilligan's Island in one of his audio books. Howard asked Jon what kind of book this is. He said they kind of know the story. Howard said he could just read this on Wikipedia. Jon clips said ''yes sir.'' The guys kept playing clips and Howard asked if he sold more than 5 copies of that book. He said he's trying to one up him there.
Howard asked what that is. He asked if that answers Robin's question. Robin asked what their plan was to get the Cavendish gang. Howard went through that and tried to keep it short. Howard said Tonto got a posse to help but none of the white people wanted to help. Howard said the Lone Ranger is pretty awesome. He said the late, great Jay Thomas had a great story about the Lone Ranger. He said he'd go on Letterman every year and tell the same story. He said Jay told the story in a way that was brilliantly funny. He said that Letterman had him on every year to tell the same story. He said the truth is that he was so type cast that he never got work again after the Lone Ranger. He said Jay's story was about how the guy was forced to stop dressing up as the Lone Ranger.
Howard said Jay's story was about when he was like 21 or 22 and working in radio and Jay and his buddy go to this car dealership and this guy Clayton Moore is there. He said he's in the whole getup as the Lone Ranger. He said Jay was into weed back then and he and his buddy were smoking weed. He said they were wasted as they were doing their show. He said Clayton had no ride home so Jay and his buddy asked if he wanted a ride. He said the car was full of junk but they gave him a lift. He said Jay and his buddy load Clayton into the car. He said they're driving along and all of a sudden they're in traffic. He said someone backs into his car and runs off. He said they decide to chase the guy who just busted his light. He said they're driving like maniacs and they catch the guy and stop his car. He said Jay and his buddy get out of the car and confront him. He said the guy denies it. The guy tells them to call the police and no one will believe them because they're hippies. Then the Lone Ranger gets out and looks at the guy and says they'll believe him. Howard said that was the end of the story. Howard said that must have fucked that guy's head up.
Howard said that was the story that Jay told every year on Letterman. He said then he'd throw a football and knock a meatball off the tree on Letterman. Howard said he watches those clips once in a while.
Howard said he has to end the show. He said he's been there 12 hours. Howard took a call from King of All Blacks who said he was going to wait until the morning but he couldn't wait. He asked where he's going. Howard said he's tired. He said he only took one break. King said Ronnie is a pussy. He said if you're going to vote for Trump then just admit it. Howard said that was weird. King said Ronnie is just embarrassed. He said he's almost 80 so just vote for the guy and admit it.
Howard said he doesn't get that you don't know who you're voting for. King said he's not undecided. He said everyone knows who they're voting for. He said Ronnie is such a pussy. Howard said you'd have to be brain dead not to know who you're voting for.
King said Ronnie is scared of Howard. Robin said Ronnie is retiring so what does he care. Howard said he's not scared of him. King said he is. He said he's going to attack him now.
Howard asked Ronnie if he's scared of him. Ronnie said he's not. He said he's not scared of Howard because he has no reason to be. Howard said he really has to go. He said he already covered this with Ronnie. Ronnie said believe him or not, he doesn't give a fuck.
Howard said he already told King that he thinks Ronnie knows already who he's voting for. Ronnie said he doesn't though. Howard said there's no way he doesn't know. Howard asked what Ronnie is waiting for. Ronnie said he has other shit on his mind. He said he doesn't want to think about it right now. He said his vote isn't going to make a difference.
King and Ronnie went back and forth arguing. Howard said Chris Wilding thinks Ronnie is voting for Biden and he doesn't want to upset his conservative friends. Ronnie asked what he's talking about. Howard asked who he would vote for if he had to vote today. Ronnie said he wouldn't vote. Howard said people died for his right to vote. King said he's the type of guy who would stand out there with big ass flags in support of Trump.
Ronnie asked if he has to listen to this mother fucker. Howard said there are people who like Trump and who like Biden. Ronnie said he already talked about this earlier. He said there are things that Trump has done that he doesn't like. He said things aren't so great right now. He said if he votes the other way he might get a guy who will be in a nursing home. He said he knows nothing about ''the woman.'' King said see, there you go.
Howard let King and Ronnie go at each other for a little longer. Ronnie was yelling at King and King was calling Ronnie stupid for wanting to move to Las Vegas.
Howard said he thinks Ronnie knows who he's going to vote for deep down. Ronnie said that's fine. Howard said there are some people who say maybe a guy with a bunch of toy cars behind him shouldn't vote. He said he sees the toy cars all lined up behind him and he's thinking that. Ronnie showed him the cars. There was a lot of yelling going on between him and King trying to talk over everyone.
Howard was going to let King ask one more question. He took forever to get it out. He said Trump is telling people to vote twice and how can you support a guy like that. Ronnie said he never said he was voting for him. Howard said this wasn't about him being right or wrong politically. He said he thinks he just knows how he will vote for. He said that's the end of the conversation. King said he's dishonest. Ronnie said Howard can say whatever he wants to. He said he can say he voted for the Black Crowes if he wants to. King asked why he would use that band with him on the phone. Ronnie said maybe he likes that band. Howard asked if that's a racist thing. Robin asked if he can't even say the Black Crowes. Ronnie asked why Howard takes this guy's calls. Howard said he has the right to an opinion. Howard hung up on King and Ronnie said he's hanging up too. Howard said Ronnie is turning beet red.
Howard said this is the longest show by 4 minutes so far during quarantine. He said he has to wind up. He recapped again and said that Jimmy Kimmel and Adam Levine will be on next week. Howard said Jimmy went silent for a while so he has no idea what he's been up to. He said he did hear from Adam though. He said it was more so than Jimmy.
Howard said Jimmy says he has good stuff in store for the Emmys so he'll be talking about that next week. He said Jimmy was talking about how hard he's working on that. He said his wife is working with him on that too.
Howard got in another plug for Zip Recruiter and ended the show around 11:20am.