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-- 5 More Years Of --

  • Business As Usual For Now. (Updated January 1, 2021)
    Please read this to find out the latest about the status of

-- Where's Today's Full Rundown? --

  • One Week Delayed Posts Started November 4, 2019
    Beginning on November 4, 2019 my daily rundowns are posted one week delayed unless you're a Patreon supporter. Patreon supporters get a link to my daily rundowns about a week early. For more details please see above ''5 More Years of''

    Here's what you can look forward to reading next week:

    • George Takei Turning Down Song Parodies. 05/05/21. 7:00am
    • Jeopardy Hosts, JD's Spelling Bee And More. 05/05/21. 7:35am
    • Fleetwood Mac Discussions. 05/05/21. 8:25am
    • Fan Feedback, Calls And Ass Napkin Ed. 05/05/21. 8:30am
    • George Takei Visits. 05/05/21. 9:00am
    • Coming Soon And More Fan Feedback. 05/05/21. 10:35am

    Last week's rundowns are now available. See below...

-- Wednesday, April 28, 2021 --

  • Demi Lovato, Karens And Gary's Mom. 04/28/21. 7:00am
    Show opening bits and songs included: An announcement about Triumph The Insult Comic Dog being on the show today to roast the show.

    Howard started the show talking about Triumph the Insult Comic Dog and one of the jokes they played in the intro. He mentioned taking a dump and how that's from taking Metamucil. He said he turned Jimmy Kimmel on to that. He said he told Jimmy to get a Toto toilet too. He said he told him how incredible it is. He said he told him he was using baby wipes before that and he thinks he went too far with that.

    Howard said he was just talking to Gary about ''Karens'' before the show. He asked Gary to define what that is. Gary said it's a white, middle aged woman who thinks her opinion is the most important in the room. He said they think they don't have to wear masks and they are just entitled people who think they don't have to hear what other people have to say.

    Howard said that's what he was thinking this Demi Lovato is. He said she went to a frozen yogurt store and got on one of the social media platforms and went on a rant about them having sugar free yogurt there. He said she was an anorexic and she went off on the shop and had to apologize for that. He said this place was family run and you have to sell a lot to pay your mortgage. He said she was on there talking about this sugar free option.

    Howard said he doesn't get what she was so upset about. Robin said she thinks that everything has to be fixed for her. Howard read an article about Demi's rant and what it was that set her off. Howard said the world isn't set up for just you. He asked what kind of parenting it was that led to that. Robin said it's like people who think you should known their pronoun before you even meet them.

    Howard said he was working in Detroit and he'd be in like 12 feet of snow and getting to work at 6. He said he had no time to think about sugar free yogurt.

    Howard played a clip of Demi Lovato's rant about the yogurt. She was going on about how it didn't sit right with her and she stood up for what she thought she should.

    Howard said it's like the right wing media going after Biden for trying to take away your red meat. He said they were making this stuff up about him because he's trying to clean up the climate. Howard had a clip of one of these guys talking about this fake story. They were making it seem like you won't be able to have a burger on the 4th of July.

    Howard said it came out that it was a totally made up story and it had nothing to do with this. He said they had to retract the story. He said it gets lost. Howard played a clip where they retracted that story. The newscaster blamed the script.

    Howard said this world has gone nuts. He did an impression of that newscaster making up stories. He said they just write lies and bullshit and people believe it. Robin said these people go to work every day and it doesn't even phase them. Howard said there's some initiative to clean up the planet and it seems pretty great to him.

    Howard said this Demi Lovato thing is out there too. He asked if she really cares about sugar in her yogurt. Howard asked Gary if she is a Karen. Gary said she is. He said Karens will go on social media to tell people what's wrong with something they're not even involved with. He said she had this thought and then she told the whole world. He said sometimes you have to wait to put it out there.

    Howard said Demi claims she will work with FroYo shop to get the messaging right. He had a clip of her talking about that on a social media post.

    Howard said he just wishes this girl grew up where he grew up. He said she'd never feel safe. He played more of the clip where she was talking about people with eating disorders feeling safe wherever they go.

    Robin said she's sure this is at the top of the list in Afghanistan. She said they don't even have frozen yogurt there. Howard said you hear stories about going there and he can understand why things over there might trigger you.

    Howard asked if every restaurant should stop serving alcohol because there are alcoholics out there. Howard said he knew a guy who was an alcoholic and he asked his family not to drink around him. Howard said he told this person that it seems to him that there's going to be a lot of alcohol out there and you're going to have to learn to deal with it. He said the person said to him that he was right. He said he had to toughen up.

    Howard said he's not sure what's so triggering about sugar free yogurt. Robin said she thinks that the messaging for her is that there's something wrong with eating frozen yogurt if you have body issues. Howard said no offense but how about not eating frozen yogurt. Robin said now Howard is going to get in trouble. Howard said he doesn't eat that shit. Gary said they invented it to cut back on the calories. Howard said it's actually the same calories. Gary said they put candy on top of it after saving the calories on the yogurt.

    Howard asked if she's the definition of a Karen. Gary said she is. He said he's obsessed with Karens. He said he scours the internet for this stuff.

    Howard read the definition for a Karen from He had Gary play some clips of some Karens that he found on the internet. Gary said this woman was at a dock and she was freaking out about a boat being in the wrong slot. She was screaming at the guy for being in the wrong slot even though the slot wasn't taken.

    Gary said he's not sure why she cares what's going on next to her. Howard said he loves how she goes into that screaming with no warning. He said in a way they must be so used to getting their way. Robin said it's like a 2 year old tantruming. Howard said he doesn't remember his daughters doing that. He said they would whine a little but not screech.

    Howard said that was a good one. He asked Gary what he has next. Gary said this is at a Lakers game and this 25 year old model gave Lebron James shit and she got thrown out. He said this is her explaining how she was the victim. Howard said this woman was super hot. He said he saw this. Howard played the clip of the woman screaming at Lebron and then getting kicked out. Then she said that Lebron looked at her husband and cussed him out so she screamed at him. She said she paid for those tickets so this isn't fair. Then she was explaining why she's not a gold digger.

    Howard said his dick shriveled up when he saw that video. He said just keep quiet and watch the game. Robin said you're supposed to watch the game and not get into it. Howard said she thinks because she's hot she should be involved. Gary said she got a lot of backlash and deleted her Instagram account and went private.

    Howard asked Gary what else he has. Gary said this woman was a driver for DoorDash and she gets to this guy's house and she's not happy with her tip. He said this is the exchange they had. Howard played the clip and the woman was complaining about the tip and saying a 12 mile trip was a 40 minute drive. She said she was taking the food back. Gary said the bill was like 30 bucks and the tip was $8. Howard said he thought you never had to deal with the driver with a service like that.

    Howard asked what else Gary has. Gary said this woman was removed from her kid's school and she explained why. Howard played the clip and this woman said she got a no trespass order from the school. Howard said stop right there. He said she's somehow going to justify this. He asked what these people do. Gary said this was on Facebook so you can go live. The woman went off on the principal and said she just broke her fucking bracelet because she's so angry. She was raging about this thing and saying she was going to sue for serving it in front of her son. She said that there was a sheriff there putting his hands on her in front of her baby. She said this woman has to get off of her fucking Facebook.

    Howard said he was talking to a guy who was a school shooter who thought that she was too crazy. Gary said she later said she wasn't on her meds when she made this video. He said she didn't say she was wrong but she said she wasn't on her meds.

    Howard asked why she was at school and the sheriff had to take her away. Gary said he didn't know the whole story.

    Howard said in 2019 that woman appeared on Dr. Phil after leading police on a chase in South Dakota. He asked what's wrong with people. Robin said he did say yesterday that we have rampant mental illness in this country.

    Gary said his mother used to go on rants like that. He said she once hit a woman in the head with a Converse sneaker in a store. He said they had to drag her out of the store. Howard asked if this is why Gary is obsessed with Karens. Gary said maybe it is.

    Howard said Gary's mom called his mom once to complain about him making fun of her son. He said that Gary told her she didn't need to do that for him. Howard said Gary's mother would be huge on social media today if she was around. He said she would have been fucking huge. He said she'd be bigger than Joe Rogan.

    Gary said that this woman had called security and was curled in a corner hiding from his mother. He said that before they came to get her his mother said they were done and leaving. Howard asked what she was upset about. Gar said it was the credit card not working. He said it was in his father's name so they said they can't use it. He said that made her nuts.

    Howard said she could have had 20 million followers. Gary said she would have wanted that too so it wouldn't have been good.

    Gary said he got some audio of his mother freaking out and she was very dismissive of it when he played it back for her. Howard asked if he still has the tape. Gar said he wishes he did but no. Howard said he would make tapes in his room when he was a kid. He said he should have taped his parents instead. He said that if Gary had taped it he could have had some bat shit crazy stuff on tape. He said he's not saying anything out of place. Gary said he was so sure that when he replayed that tape for his mom that she would hear it and say she had to get help.

    Howard said Beth tapes him when he snores. He said they read that if you play it back for a person they will never snore again. He said he still snores though.

    Howard said Gary's mom was ahead of her time. He said if she was alive now she'd have a show on FOX News. Gary said all of the trauma in his life was from when his mom was off her meds. He said you never knew when things were going to go bad. He said when she went off he hoped she'd stay in the box they lived in. He said they did a school trip once and she offered to be the parent on the trip. He said two things happened that day that scarred him for life. He said they had 7 busses going into the city. He said they were all waiting to go and they were waiting for his mom to show up. He said she held up the whole thing for 20 minutes. He said the other thing that happened was his mother chasing misbehaving kids with her shoe. He said when he went back to school the kids were asking what was wrong with her. He said this was in 5th grade and that's the last thing you want at that age.

    Gary said the biggest thing was issues they had with their neighbor and his mother would fight with her. He said this woman gave her the finger and his mother got so enraged that she ended up pulling out the woman's plants. He said the woman came out and his mother started hitting her with the roots of the plants. He said the police were called and she ended up in the back of a police cruiser. He said the entire neighborhood came out and saw her in the police car.

    Howard asked why mentally ill people refuse to take their medication. Gary said this wasn't her problem. He said she self medicated. He said that she'd take medication if she felt certain ways. He said that she would take the amounts she thought she should. Robin said that's what people were doing. She said she was the first person to do a lot of things. Howard said she'd be a huge star on Real Housewives.

    Howard said Gary lived with the ultimate Karen. He said it's no wonder he's obsessed with them. He said he thinks that his dad saved Gary and his brothers from her by telling them that she was sick in the head and it wasn't their fault. He said Gary's dad left her a few times. Gary said he tried to keep his mom hidden from Mary for a long time. He said that he ended up getting to the phone first and all of that. He said one day he came home from work and Mary was white as a ghost. He said that his mom ended up getting a hold of her one day and went off on her. He said that it could have been any number of things that they didn't know they were doing.

    Howard said some women will look at the mother and think the son is nuts too. He said he's not going to goof on Gary for listening to vinyl anymore. He said that's his escape. Robin said take a nap at work any time he wants. Howard said go to sleep right now. Gary said he's exhausted from telling those stories all at once on the air. He said he's never done that before.

    Howard said Gary's mother became really pleasant late in life. Gary said she had a brain injury from a car accident. He said she was so nice. He said the last 10 years of her life were completely different. He said his wife wondered where this woman was all that time. He said he remembers that it was the first year she was in the nursing home and he went to see her. He said she asked where he was and he said he went to a parade. He said she said she likes parades and hoped he had a nice time. He said that should have led to a fight.

    Howard said it's too bad she didn't just get into an accident 40 years ago. He said that seems like a Marvel story. Robins said there is a phenomenon when people have a hit on their head and have a brain injury that another personality can emerge. She said that once when she was a nurse this guy was recovering from a brain injury and he would pull up a stool and give a stand up comedy routine that was brilliant. She said when he recovered he had no recollection of it and he was very shy and never would be in front of an audience. She said it was crazy.

    Howard said he remembers watching that show ''That's Incredible'' and they had a guy on the show who had a brain tumor and he was able to do things that he wasn't able to do before like speak different languages.

    Gary said the most twisted thing was that he got the mom he wanted but he kind of missed the old mom. He said it just wasn't her anymore. He said he didn't miss the old mom all the time but it really took away a lot of her personality.

    Howard said it's like the Kennedy's getting Rosemary Kennedy that lobotomy. He went into his Kennedy voice talking about how they went too far with that. Howard said the Kennedy's tried to do a Mrs. Dell'Abate on her.

    Gary said there were stretches of time when his mom wasn't so bad. He said that you never knew when it was going to change though. Howard said it's like a Jack in the Box. He said you never knew when that fucker was going to pop up. Gary said she had a run of 5 years where she was great. He said he thinks she had a chemical imbalance and the meds didn't help.

    Howard said if his mother did what Gary's did with the shoe, he'd freak out. He said that would be a curse. He said poor Gary.

    Gary said he has another story. He said they got a baby sitter for their son who was about a year old. He said they had a 15 year old neighbor babysitting. He said they got a call from the babysitter's dad who called to let him know that his mom called and threatened to kill herself. He said they get there and the babysitter is white as a ghost. He said it turns out she left a message on the machine and the girl heard the message. Gary said they let the babysitter go home and listened to the message. He said she was screaming crying but this was something they were used to. He said the kid didn't know that this was a regular thing.

    Howard said his mom used to do the ''I'm going to kill myself'' thing too. He said it was an empty threat.

    Howard said Gary's dad got the divorce and then he went back to the mom and lived with her. Gary said it was a couple of years. Howard said Gary's dad was living with 3 other guys in the basement of a house with 3 other guys. He said he figured going home was better than staying there. Gary said his dad was in a house on Long Island and there was this one room available. He said the house was completely empty other than one chair and a snack tray. He said that guy's wife took it all and that's all he had left. Gary said his dad asked for a hot plate for Christmas that year. He said it was so sad.

    Howard asked how they got along at the end. Gary said he tried to get an answer from his dad but he never really said. He said he went down to Florida and they lived together for a couple of years. He said he asked if they were a couple and his dad didn't know. He said they had different rooms in their own trailer down there in Florida. He said it looked like a pretty decent place but they had separate bedrooms.

    Gary said at the end he would go there and his mother would make food that his dad didn't like. He said they were always bickering. He said his dad wanted to come home to die at home. He said his mom held his hand and said it was time to go. She said it was time to be with Steven. She leaned into him and he told her to shut up.

    Gary said they got divorced after 43 years of marriage. He said that he figured they were going to ride it out. He said then his dad moved out.

    Howard said they should get back to Karens before Gary starts to cry. Gary got back to that and had a clip of a racist Karen. He said she was yelling at a worker whose truck was blocking her driveway. Howard played the clip and the woman was throwing the N-word around like crazy.

    Howard said they tantrum so much. He said they go from zero to sixty. Robin said she likes how they know the law about using the N-word.

    Gary said this goes viral and the local news asks her about it and she doubles down. Howard played that clip next. The woman said there's nothing illegal about saying it and she had reasons to be racist. She didn't care if people were upset and she doesn't care if she's called racist. Robin said she is racist so she doesn't care about that.

    Howard asked if he has more. Gary said he does. He said this is the SoHo Karen who stayed in a hotel in SoHo and she couldn't find her phone so she blamed it on a 14 year old black kid she saw. Howard said he saw this. He played the clip and the woman was freaking out about her phone going missing and they told her to us Find My iPhone to find it. Howard said they could have just called the number to see if it rang. Gary said if they had done that they would have found out it was in the back of an Uber she took. Howard said she got a bunch of felony charges for this whole thing.

    Gary said this woman was all over the news so she went to talk to Gayle King and that didn't go very well. Howard played that clip and the woman said that she wanted a real interview after being asked the same question twice.

    Robin mentioned that the show A Current Affair is still on and its hosted by Deborah Norville. Howard said he saw her at Joan Rivers' funeral. He said that Cindy Adams was killing at that funeral. He said it was really something. He said that he wanted to open at the funeral and went to Melissa Rivers to ask if he could go first. He said it was like a roast. He said he thought he had some funny stuff to do. He said it was kind of moving and he thought his shit was pretty good. He said he knew he was going to get some laughs. He said Deborah Norville was really good there too. He said then Cindy gets up and she looked like she was half out of it but she was doing a full blown monologue. Howard said they had stories and anecdotes.

    Howard said Joan used to be on the show all the time. He said he would get hate mail about it but he loved her on the show. He said Jimmy Kimmel came up with a good name for his fans. He said they should be called ''Sterncoats.'' He said he thought that was pretty good.

    Howard said he got crushed at the funeral. He said he was good too but those two came out of nowhere. Howard said it's Inside Edition that she hosts not a Current Affair.

    Howard asked Gary if he has more. Gary said he has some anti-mask Karens. Howard said those are his favorites. Gary said this woman was removed from a Starbucks for not wearing a mask. Howard played the clip and the woman told the guy to take his hand off of her. She said she has her first amendment right and this is kidnapping.

    Howard said he could never be a cop. He said you have to have too many skills to deal with people. Gary said this was just to get her to leave the store. He said they had to take her into custody after that. He had another clip of this woman freaking out about being arrested. She was screaming when they put the cuffs on her. She claimed she was not under arrest and just leave her alone. She said she can't breathe as she's screaming. Then she starts saying ''In the name of Jesus...'' over and over.

    Howard said he's shocked she didn't start speaking in tongues. He said Jesus wants nothing to do with her. Robin said he's hiding in a corner somewhere from her.

    Gary said he has just a couple more. He said this is a woman arguing with a manager of a Trader Joes. He said the guy was just explaining that he doesn't make the rules but they have to follow them. Howard played the clip and the woman was arguing that they can't keep her out because of their rules because they're not laws. She went on and on about how they have to let her in even though she had no mask on.

    Howard said he hates that. He said she thinks she's a lawyer. He said when you apply for a job at Trader Joes you don't want to deal with that. Gary said there are a lot of things like that he didn't use because they were more visual. He said that one guy body slammed a guy at Home Depot over the mask thing. Howard said that guy should be in jail.

    Gary said this is the last clip. He said men can be Karens too. He said this guy is yelling at people for wearing masks. He said his friends had to drag him out of the store. Howard played the clip and the guy was saying that they're a bunch of idiots for wearing masks and this isn't real. He said they look like idiots. Howard said he hopes he got COVID and died. Howard wondered if his mother paid attention to him. He said he's going to beat up a person for wearing a mask.

    Gary said he has a song to wrap this up. Howard played a song about Karens. They had a bunch of the clips from the stuff Gary had Howard play.

    Howard said usually the Karens aren't that hot but that one who was at the Lakers game was. He said he's not sure if he could fuck her after that though.

    Howard took a call from Fake Arnold Schwarzenegger who was saying that these women turn him on. He said he looks for women like this when he's out driving around. He said it makes him so hot. He was cumming as he was talking about that. Howard said that would have been good if they could have heard it.

    Howard took a call from a guy who said poor Gary had to deal with so much. He said he's had to deal with a lot of shit. He said Howard should be forbidden from busting his balls. Howard said his heart isn't in it when he hears that stuff. He said he has had a difficult life. The caller said forget the therapist and just go to Gary. He said if he can be happy then anyone can be happy.

    Gary asked if he has ever calculated how much he's spent on therapy. Howard said he could never do that. He said that would be a bad idea. He said he was thinking about Gary and how he should just eat as many plantain chips as he wants. Gary said he's just telling some of the worst stories. He said his son, Lucas, had a lot of questions about grandma when his book came out. He said he remembered her taking a bunch of garlic knots at a restaurant they went to once. He said he tries to give him all the details about her.

    Howard said he feels bad. He said that when he threw out that pitch he loved it. He said it wasn't so bad. He said lets see someone else do better. Gary said don't' be patronizing. He said he can be himself. Howard said there it is. Robin said that Sal should stop goofing on Gary too. Gary said they both have some messed up stories. Howard did a live commercial read and went to break after that.


  • More Ass Napkin Ed And Ass Napkin Chris Clips. 04/28/21. 8:25am
    After the break they played an ''Ask Ronnie'' bit where he was asked a bunch of questions about Jon Benet Ramsey and Bryan Adams ''Summer of '69.''

    Howard came back and had Ronnie singing with the Summer of 69. Howard said he has Ass Napkin Ed on the phone. He took Ed's call but he was asleep and snoring. Howard said Ed called in at like 6 this morning to get on the show. He said he has a colony of worms in his ass so that must make him tired.

    Howard took a call from a guy who said he thinks Ass Napkin Ed is the grossest Wack Packer ever. Howard said for him Jeff the Vomit Guy is the worst. The caller said that's a fetish though. Howard said he can't even pick up on him sometimes when he calls. He said it's just so gross to hear about him wanting women to vomit on him. He said he'd rather hear about Ass Napkin Ed's worms.

    Howard said he thinks Ed is waking up. He said maybe not. Ed was still snoring. Howard said he has to read some fan feedback. He said they played a prank call where Chris Wilding made a call to Ed as Ass Napkin Chris. He said the fans loved that. He read some feedback about that. Howard said the whole conversation was about an hour and he said he might do a special for the fans. He said it's really intense. He said the fans are calling for more of that. He read some feedback from fans who were asking for them to run it without any edits.

    Howard said America may have Ass Napkin fever. He said he's back to being popular on the show. Howard told Chris he did a good job with that impression. Chris was snoring like Ass Napkin Ed. Chris said he feels good about what he did. He said it's nice to bring him back into the fray.

    Ward asked what's wrong with his microphone. He said it sounds like the ocean. Chris did something that fixed it but he said he didn't do anything.

    Howard said he has a few more clips from the conversation that Ass Napkin Ed and Ass Napkin Chris had. Howard said Ed was talking about how to get rid of his worms and he was going to burn them out with a hair dryer. Chris said that he asked Ed about the toothbrush he uses to scratch his ass and he said he doesn't think he uses the same one to brush his teeth. He said he only has like 5 teeth anyway. He said it's better that way because you don't get toothaches.

    Howard said he has a cat named Walter who doesn't have any teeth now. He said he has great breath now too. He said Ed is like that. He said Walter had been abused and no one took care of his teeth. He said he's fine now.

    Howard played the conversation that Ass Napkin Ed and Ass Napkin Chris had about heating the worms out of Ed's ass. Ed turned the blow dryer on and tired to burn them out. He said it burns. He farted after trying to burn them out.

    Howard said we live in 2021 and there are so many medications to get rid of pinworms. He said meanwhile this guy is trying to burn them out. He said it's like a cartoon. He said he could shove a stick of dynamite up there to blow them out of there.

    Howard and Chris did their Ass Napkin Ed impressions and talked about the pinworms and different ways to get them out of there. Howard had him talking about burning them out with gasoline. Howard said there's already a cure for this stuff.

    Howard said he likes when he tells Ed that his worms are worse than his and Ed goes ''Oh man...'' Chris said he told him they were grabbing food from the refrigerator and Ed said he must have tape worms.

    Howard said he has a couple more clips. He said people are demanding it. He said he has to play them for the Sterncoats. Howard said Chris told Ed that he feeds his worms flies. Ed told Chris that he has had flies on his crotch. Ed said it turned him on because they tickled. He said they're attracted to the smell of assholes. He said maybe Ass Napkin Chris has maggots in his butt.

    Ass Napkin Howard and Ass Napkin Chris were talking about their maggots and flies in their asses. They were making up stuff that Ed could talk about. Howard wondered how Ed is from this area with that accent he has. Chris wondered how he's from this planet.

    Howard said they weren't going to play this part but this is gold. He played a clip of Ed talking about having his ass eaten before by a broad. He said that he doesn't think he had the worms at the time. He said this broad was from PlentyOfFish. Chris said he goes on PlentyOfWorms to get women. He said that he had a woman eat out his ass and she had a mouth full of worms like a bird.

    Howard said Ed has no idea that Chris is doing an impression of him. Chris said they're just a couple of guys talking about their asses. Howard did his Ass Napkin Ed voice and talked about these ''broads'' and how they like to eat worms out of his ass.

    Howard said this is bonus material. He said the boys got into a long discussion about jerking off and Ed said his cum tastes like mushroom soup. Howard played the clip where Ed and Chris talked about that. Chris asked what his cum tastes like. Ed said it tastes like Mushroom soup and Chris said his is like cream of broccoli soup. Chris said maybe they could get together and taste each other's to see if they taste the same. He said that's not gay. Ed said he's not sure about that. Chris said he was just testing him.

    Howard said that was kind of gay complimenting Chris on his jizz. He said he likes that Ed is on medication but not medication for his worms. Howard said he'd think that if you were scrubbing your asshole with a toothbrush that you'd do something about it. He said he has nothing going on in his life. Chris said the worms might be like friends. Ass Napkin Howard and Ass Napkin Chris were talking more about the jizz stuff together.

    Howard said he has one more clip. He said Ed told Wolfie about a rubber torso he uses to pleasure himself. Howard played that clip and Ed told Wolfie about this thing that's kind of like Jell-O and he calls it Amanda. He told Wolfie that sometimes he doesn't clean it out. He said you might want to hold your breath around it when you don't clean it out.

    Howard said he guarantees that's how COVID-19 got started. He said it was probably in some cheap ass love doll. Chris said he loved the question about how he cleans it. He said it was such a loaded question. He said he doesn't even clean himself.

    Howard said he thinks that their next guest has worms too. He wondered if Ed's parents wonder what they did wrong with him. Howard did his impression of what his parents might sound like and they sounded like Ass Napkin Ed.

    Howard took a call from a guy who said this is the funniest fucking thing he's ever heard. He said he wants to throw up but he couldn't.

    Howard said the worst part of this is that Chris can't call Ed again because he's on to him. Chris said he's not sure about that.

    Howard said it's funny that Ed never said anything about how similar their lives are. Chris said that's what's great about a Wack Packer.

    Howard said he loves that Ed's ass smells so much that he's like a Venus Fly Trap. He said the flies go to his dick and he cums from it. He said any guy who blow dries his asshole might take a call from anyone named Ass Napkin.

    Howard said Ed is probably just happy to have someone who doesn't run away from him immediately. Chris said he was trying to figure out how to end the call and started to fall asleep. He said Ed asked if he was sleeping.

    Howard took a call from a woman who said that she's about to vomit. Howard asked her if she's ever had worms from an asshole. She said something about a meal she had one time that wasn't so good and that was the last time she ever ate chili.

    Howard said he has to get Triumph on. He said it's not that easy to get him on the show. He said that he has things to promote. He said everyone loves him. He did a live commercial read and went to break.


  • Triumph The Insult Comic Dog (Robert Smigel) Visits. 04/28/21. 9:05am
    After the break they played a Dr. Phil with Gary bit, a song parody about fat Benjy and Meat Puppets ''Lake of Fire.''

    Howard came back and said they had the Meat Puppets on the show a long time ago. He said everyone loves Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. He said he's there to promote the show ''Let's Be Real'' which is on FOX Thursday night. He said he's got more to promote and he'll talk about that later.

    Howard said it's funny that he got big so fast that they weren't able to get him on the show. Triumph said he's turned down many invitations. He said he's just a baby. He said he's not even performing in show business anymore.

    Howard said he didn't know what his room would look like on Zoom. He said he has some paintings of flowers on his wall. Triumph said he has books on the floor for urinary purposes. Howard said he figured that he made millions of dollars doing what he does. He said the room is kind of barren. Triumph said he likes to be understated. He said the door is very narrow in there. Triumph said that the bathroom is very shitty.

    Howard said he wants to talk to Bob for a second. He said the room looks like a penitentiary. Triumph said he doesn't want to break character. He said when you break character the act is fucked.

    Howard said he used to think he was rolling in dough but maybe not. Triumph showed him the Venetian blinds he had and said they're real wood.

    Howard said that things are kind of falling apart. He said he sees the human head on the side of the screen. Triumph said that's a Jewman being.

    Howard said he said this to a friend that Michael Vick's dogs live better than he does. Triumph said that's not true. He said Michael Vick's dogs actually settled in a civil suit. Howard said that must be big in the dog world. Triumph said they're rolling in it now. He said they get all of his money now.

    Howard said it's so funny how bad that room is he's in. He said it looks like he finally got that big cigar to stick in his mouth. Triumph said he's only got the one so he's not opening his mouth.

    Howard asked if he can share his great thoughts with them. Triumph said it's great to see Howard and Robin in their home offices. He asked when they last saw each other. Howard said it was over a year ago. Robin said it was March of 2020. Triumph said they wont be in the same room until Ronnie's funeral. He said who are they kidding, Howard won't go to his funeral.

    Howard asked if there's a line he won't cross. Triumph said he won't joke about Prince Philip's death. He said he actually went to the funeral. He said it was whiter than Ronnie's pubic hair. He said that's nothing to joke about. He said he knows how Queen Elizabeth must feel.

    Triumph said Howard's staff wrote jokes for him but he hasn't read one yet. He said it's been too long since they spoke. Howard said it must be tough to be an insult comic dog. Howard said he used to be on Conan's show. Triumph said that Sally Jesse Raphael was on the show in 1994 so there were two dogs. He said he's just joking.

    Howard said Triumph is kind of the new Don Rickles. Triumph said there's also Jeff Ross. He said he is the Roastmaster General. Triumph said he just does his thing and he just wants to hurt people's hearts. Howard asked where the bitterness comes from. He said he must have had a horrible upbringing.

    Triumph said he had a horrible upbringing. He said his mother was a Rottweiler. Howard asked what he makes of Conan retiring from late night. Triumph said he's not sure what he'll do. He said the only other thing he can do is pull things down from high shelves. He said he does have a podcast now though. He said it's as big as that Marc Maron guy. He said they all came around to realize they don't need the audience.

    Triumph said he did a podcast last year but he got pandemic'd and it's gone now.

    Howard asked Triumph to do some jokes for them. Triumph said in April 2019 they caught a black what? Howard said what. Triumph said it was a black... person shaking hands with Sal. He had one about Richard that he quickly told.

    Triumph asked if he should break into his insult comedy. Howard said he should. Triumph said fasten your seat belts. Howard said this is a bitter dog who is very funny. Triumph said he is filled with hatred and you're the beneficiary.

    Triumph said that Howard has signed on for 5 more years. He said Rush Limbaugh knew when to leave them wanting more.

    Triumph said he was happy for Howard to sign on for more because he didn't want Benjy out on the streets. Triumph asked Fred to give him a rim shot. Fred said he thought he was going to do the move. Triumph told him when to do it.

    Triumph said Howard is keeping more fat old men alive than Remdesivir. He said people call in and say Howard talks about COVID too much. He said he asks if people would rather hear more about kitten adoption.

    Triumph asked if Beth is double vaccinated. Howard said yes she is. Triumph said that she must always feel sick from a little prick inside her. Howard said he's so mean.

    Triumph said that you can't expect bang o'clock when you have a face that can stop a clock. He goofed on Howard's looks and had Howard cracking up. Triumph said he heard that Beth is really turned on by his fountain pens. He said especially the one that he used to sign his will.

    Howard said he has gotten even more biting than usual. He said he's laughing and crying over all of this.

    Triumph said Howard's interests get more and more bland by the day, kind of like Jon Hein's diet. He said he'll probably be crocheting dildo cozies for Ronnie some day. He said Ronnie will probably be long dead by that time though.

    Triumph said he really is starting to worry people. He said he hasn't left the house in 14 months and he's like an unfuckable Howard Hughes. Triumph said the only cure for this virus is to stay home. He said that's great for Howard. He had a joke about Gary and what that would be like for him.

    Howard said he has never seen Triumph like this. Triumph said he's usually on the couch in there. He said how about Gary Dell'Abate. He said he looks great. He said he abuses Gary more than JD abuses the English language. Triumph said Gary takes more abuse than Jon Hein's toilet after an Arby's bender.

    Triumph said that Gary gets much better sleep at the office than he does at home. He said he has to work on the computer after all these years of phoning it in.

    Triumph said Howard speaks the truth. He said the right wingers go after Howard but they really hate Gary because one look at him proves that we evolved from apes.

    Triumph asked why Gary isn't showing his face. Howard asked Gary to get on. Triumph said he misses him. Gary got on and Triumph asked why he isn't in more moves like the one where he fucks Godzilla. He said he misses Gary. He said he dreamed he was kissing him. He said he has to remember to stop going to sleep with his face so close to his ass.

    Triumph said he's not going to tell jokes about Robin unless she wants him to. Robin said he should express himself. Triumph said Robin and Fred are such loyal people. He said one always has his hand up a puppet's ass and one has her head up Howard's ass.

    Triumph said Robin is the only one who truly understands him. He said he's another one whose career has been carried by an ugly Jew. Robin said how dare you.

    Triumph said that Robin is getting up there in years. He said he understands that she masturbated with a cucumber and it came back out a pickle. He said that she's still beautiful. He said she's still in the game. He said she likes to double up on birth control so she uses the pill and the sound of her voice. He said he's joking of course. He said he's not sure who wrote that joke but they have no taste in voices. He said he really does kid. He said he double kids.

    Triumph said next time Robin gets eaten out is when her cats eat her after she dies. He said he won't say who wrote that on the writing staff.

    Triumph said Robin went into nursing but no one told her tits. He said that's a joke about her big boobs. Howard said he's as brutal as he's ever been. Triumph said he's sorry. He said you have to be careful about what you say about women these days. He said he wants to perform a segment of comedy about her enormous vagina. Robin laughed and told him to go ahead. Triumph said that he didn't know it was enormous until he read the joke. He said he Googled some information and her last lover was Mr. X who was very large. He said the next guy she fucks is going to have some big holes to fill.

    Triumph said he loves Robin and his whole staff there. He asked if everyone is getting vaccinated. Howard said they are. Triumph said he heard that Ronnie refused to take the Johnson and Johnson vaccine until they make the needle the size of Sal and Richard's penises.

    Triumph said he wants to know how they got their mouths off of each other's penises to make a mould. Howard said he's not sure.

    Howard said this is some roast today. Triumph said that the Jew's arm is very tired. Howard said he will talk to the Jew when he's too tired to hold it. Triumph said he has a lot of jokes so he can go on. Howard asked how he really wants to roast. Triumph said he is so angry at Ronnie. He said not really. He said he will hit the highlights. He said you have to admire Ronnie because he won't tell you who he voted for but he will tell you how much his girlfriend stuffed inside him the night before.

    Triumph said it's tough to make fun of these guys. He said you're not supposed to punch down but to make fun of Sal what other direction is there? He said he's lower than Prince Philip's nut sack. He said Sal was caught masturbating at work but it was time for Richard's lunch after all. Triumph said that he wanted to say congratulations on Richard's new son but his poor wife has 3 diapers to change now.

    Howard asked if he can talk to the Jew whose arm controls Triumph. Triumph said that's fine but prepare to be bored. Howard said this is Robert Smigel. He said he's the genius behind Triumph. Bob popped on screen. Howard said people don't know how talented he really is. Bob said that's okay. Howard asked if he's a Bob or a Robert. Bob said he likes when Howard calls him Bob. He said what he likes about Howard is that it's very endearing. His microphone was all fucked up so Howard asked if he should take a break. Bob said he can fix it. He said he's not good at this at all. He did something to fix it but he knocked himself off. Bob said he can hear him now. Howard said he sounds good now.

    Howard said Triumph pissed on Bob's microphone. Bob said he doesn't like conceding the camera. Howard said it's hard to get Bob on camera. He said he doesn't do him a lot so he appreciates him coming on. Bob said he's doing other things because he has to make a living. Howard asked why the podcast didn't work out. Bob said it worked out really well but he was doing it in Brooklyn with an audience. He said he can't just interview people as Triumph. He said they did it in front of audiences but then the pandemic came and he had to shut it down.

    Bob mentioned the Adam Sandler movie he directed that Ronnie was in. Howard said Bob didn't want to direct it. Bob said he never wanted to direct movies. He said he's the first guy on set and the last one to leave. He said he'd rather write it and just produce. He said that way he can just tell Sandler what he likes and doesn't like.

    Howard said Sandler asks him to write something and then direct it. He said Sandler pushed him to do it. Bob said that he and Adam are like cheerleaders or each other and he's always supported him. He said it ended up being a movie he wanted to direct. He did his impression of Adam telling him what he wanted with that movie.

    Howard said Bob was hired at 25 years old to work on Saturday Night Live. He said he wrote some of the best sketches over there. He said that he and Sandler got to know each other over there. Howard said Lorne Michaels asked him to be a talent scout and he brought in Sandler. Bob said he didn't bring him in but he thought he was very funny when he saw his audition. He said what is true is that he was a big champion of him. He said Greg Daniels, Conan O'Brien and Bob Odenkirk were also writers there. He said Adam would write stuff that would bomb in the room other than the four writers. He said they were all cracking up. He said that they let Adam do one or two of those things and young people connected with it. He said he hung out with Farley's brothers and he got to be in one of those sketches. He said they were doing it with George Wendt and Chris Farley and his brothers were telling him that their brother wasn't the break out star, it was Sandler.

    Howard said Bob was like the gate keeper there. Bob said he was like the fourth in charge. He said he had an influence on the show and he helped get Rachel Dratch get hired. Howard said she's very funny. Bob said she was 34 at the time and they were afraid she was too old. He said it was a weird time for that.

    Bob said he got to see Chris Rock and Chris Farley audition as well as Sandler. Howard asked if Lorne Michaels ever said that he didn't get someone like those guys. Bob said he got Chris Rock.

    Howard said sometimes they hire people and don't know what to do with them. He said Chris Rock was like that. Bob said that Damon Wayans was like that 10 years before. He said it was dry humor that was dominating comedy. Howard said he knows what he means. He said that Jewish comics have a certain sensibility. Bob said it's like that Richard Belzer kind of comedy. He said it wasn't ironic like Steve Martin.

    Howard said when Bob was working on Conan he was almost like anti-Letterman. He said he had to do something different. Bob said they did it because they did love Dave. Howard asked what it was to be anti-David Letterman. Bob said that Dave was moving to CBS and they wanted to do something different. He said he wanted to do sketch comedy in late night. He said kind of like what Steve Allen did in the 50s. He said that's what he wanted to do with Dana Carvey. He said Jimmy Fallon did that many years later. He said they did some of that on Conan. He said when Conan got the gig he had those ideas in his head and he and Conan did that kind if thing.

    Howard said Bob met Conan at Saturday Night Live and he thought he was the funniest guy in the room. Bob said he and Jim Downey were the two guys who could make everyone in the room laugh. Howard asked if that makes you a great sketch writer. Bob said not really but Conan was a great sketch writer. He said he was super fun to write with. He said his greatest strength was that he could make any scene better. He said if he had an idea and Conan wanted to write it with him it was going to be better.

    Howard asked if he ever got envious of the main people eon the show. Bob said he loves performing but he was hired in 1985 and it was a very rocky year. He said it was with Robert Downey and Anthony Michael Hall and Randy Quaid. He said they weren't really sketch performers. He said there was a part of him that thought he could have done better but then they brought in Dana Carvey and people like that the next year. He said then he saw how good you really had to be.

    Howard asked if he got pissed off when he didn't get on air. Bob said he wouldn't get pissed but he'd go to the performers and ask them to do a line a certain way and he could see the look in their eye.

    Howard asked if Bob is kind of unassuming in a room usually. He asked if he's on all the time or what. Bob said he's serious when he's working on a show. He said he is a big worrier. He said that people think that it's a workaholic thing but it's more of a worry-holic. He said he saw a video years ago that was from Saturday Night Live on a Thursday night and someone had taken a ball apart and they were all taking this goo inside the ball was being thrown against the wall. He said the person taking the video took a shot of him and he was the only one reading a script while everyone else was having fun.

    Bob said that he knew he was good because he cares about details. He said that Jim Downey asked him to look over other sketches because he was so detail oriented.

    Howard said it seems that Bob wanted to be head writer. Bob said he didn't wanted to be head writer. He said that he was a brat and he was very opinionated. He said he wore his honesty on his sleeve. He said that he was intimidated but he was also the nerdiest person ever to be hired there. He said he grew up in New York and he knew a lot about Saturday Night Live. He said it really changed New York in a lot of ways. He said Lorne doesn't get a lot of credit for that. He said that so many people abandoned the city while Lorne stuck it out. He said they should rename the whole block after him. Howard said he's right about that. Bob said he's not just kissing his ass. He said there are a lot of people who have streets named after them. He said Lorne isn't one of them.

    Howard said that he's right because they celebrated New York. He said they would say ''Live, from New York.'' Bob said that Lorne even brought the Tonight Show back to New York. Howard said it was a big time for New York when they had Saturday Night Live starting out.

    Howard asked Bob how at 25 years old he got that job. He asked how he knew he could write. Bob said he didn't. He said he thought he was going to be a dentist. He said he didn't know he could make people laugh other than his friends.

    Howard said he saw the video of his father doing dental bonding on TV. He said he was the one who came up with the whole idea of bonding. Bob said that they were meant to resemble teeth instead of being silver. He said he was doing a lot of different things and he ended up going on That's Incredible to show it off. Howard said he was on to a good thing. He said he wanted his son to be a dentist. Bob said he didn't force him into it and he thought he had that as an option. He said he was good with his hands and he could draw really well.

    Howard said Bob has a very biting humor. He said you have to sit down and find the things that annoy you most to write that stuff. Bob said it's stuff that annoys you or makes you uncomfortable.

    Howard asked if he remembers what he got on air for the first time. Bob said he does. He said he was writing stuff like Andy Kaufman would do. He said he did a sketch where it was practical jokes on animals like a Candid Camera kind of show.

    Howard said Bob loves doing animal humor. He said one of the best sketches he ever wrote was this Clucky the chicken sketch. Bob said that may be his favorite he ever wrote for Saturday Night Live. Howard explained the bit and how funny it was. Bob explained it too and went through the whole process of making fried chicken. Howard said they end up chopping up the chicken and it was so sadistic. He said it's such a great sketch.

    Howard asked how he got that gig at 25. Bob said he was just so lucky. He said it's so much more competitive now. He said what happened was that he was performing in Chicago and he sucked at science in college so he gave up. He said he did some stand up and won a contest and that gave him some confidence. He said he was okay at stand up but he didn't want to keep doing it. He said he won a contest and that wasn't it. He said then he had to do shows at 1:30 in the morning at comedy clubs. He said he didn't want to do that. He said he wanted to do weird shit instead. He said that he would do a bit where he was an orthodox Jew with a cotton candy beard. He said he'd come out and not say anything but then he'd turn the page with his wet finger. He said once they started laughing then he'd start eating his beard. He said it was that kind of shit. He said you can't do that at 1:30 at night. He said they hate you for that. He said that late at night you want someone to talk to you.

    Howard asked Bob how he got the job. Bob said he did sketch comedy in Chicago and graduated college. He said he failed organic chemistry when he went to dental school. He said they still wanted to take him because of his father though. He said he wanted to defer for a year but they wanted him to go. He said this woman wanted him to go even though he had a C average. He said he failed Organic Chemistry. He said he got an F and she was stumped by it. He said she said that was going to be hard.

    Howard asked how he got the job at Saturday Night Live. Bob said he took these classes and met people and they formed a comedy group. He said it was a great place to form a group. He said there was no end game like there is in New York and L.A. Bob said that they were there to just do comedy. He said that people in the mid-west are more content with their lives. Howard said he's right about that. He said it's not the same as New York. Bob said he's very lucky because now you can start improv in New York. He said back then it didn't exist.

    Bob said this guy in his comedy group, Dave Reynolds, was cast in a movie that Al Franken and Tom Davis were making. He said they came to see their show and they took them out for beer after. He said that was great but then 2 weeks later he found out that Al and Tom were being hired on Saturday Night Live when Lorne was returning. He said that he now knew someone at Saturday Night Live and they gave him support. He said he and two other guys were hired and the one guy was beaten out by Jon Lovitz.

    Howard asked if he had to submit writing samples. Bob said he did. He said it still amazes him that he got hired.

    Howard said all of this was based on human interaction. He said imagine if a pandemic hit back then. He said he feels bad for young people now. Bob said it is kind of strange but everyone else is stalled just like they are.

    Howard asked if he's still close with Al Franken. Bob said he is. He said he was a great senator. Howard said he was. Bob said whatever he did he should have been able to have it evaluated by the Senate ethics committee. He said look at what Matt Gaetz is being accused of. He said Al was collateral damage. He said they were trying to win in Georgia and they had to do something. He said if the governor of Minnesota was a Republican Al wouldn't have been pressured to resign.

    Howard said Bob wrote the Star Trek convention bit where William Shatner told them to get a life. Bob said he had never heard that saying before but he's sure he didn't make it up. He said that became a big thing after that.

    Howard said Bob says that the best sketch he ever saw on Saturday Night Live was the Patrick Swayze and Chris Farley dance thing. Bob said that there was a book about Chris' life that came out and he was talking about how that was the first step in killing him. He said that it was like he had no respect for himself. Howard said the controversy was that Chris was overweight and the joke was that Farley was being made fun of because he's a fat guy. Bob said that's why the sketch was great. He said that Farley was incredibly nimble and an athlete. He said he danced very well in that sketch. He said he had fantastic energy and it was actually very empowering. He said that he was just going for it. He said he's an amazing physical comedian.

    Howard asked if Chris is the guy who was the funniest there. Bob said he was explosively funny and he thinks that people would agree with that.

    Howard said he loved a lot of the sketches he wrote. He said one that he wrote was the McLaughlin Group sketch. He said it was like a song the way it played out. Bob said he and Dana used to bond over finding the music in someone's vocal rhythms. He said that they would expand it from there. He said that they would fuse these impressions together.

    Howard said he must have been in heaven writing with Dana. He said he can do any voice and he has a rhythm to the voices. Bob said that he was very practical. He said he had a very practical approach to work. He said that he came in and asked the writers to write with him with the impressions he can do.

    Howard said no one ever knew what to do with Dana until he got to Saturday Night Live. Bob said he was a very unassuming person in real life. He said he was good in sketches as himself but in movies they didn't know what to do with him. He said they didn't figure out what that persona was. He said he would have been a great talk show host. He said that he's very funny and charming. Howard said he always thought he could have been as big as Jim Carrey. He said if he had just found something like Jim did that Dana could have been huge.

    Howard asked Bob why someone can't sustain a career on Saturday Night Live. He said that Dana could have stayed on. Bob said look at Kenan Thompson. He said he's been on for like 15 years. Howard asked why it's a stigma. Bob said it's not now. Howard asked if they don't pay enough money. Bob said he's sure Kenan gets some good money. He said he's got a Sitcom right now. He said that a lot of the cast don't get to do that. He said for every Adam Sandler there's 20 who don't have that success.

    Bob asked if Howard has seen Carvey do Biden yet. Howard said he thinks he did. Bob said it's hilarious. He said it's his funniest president since Bush. Howard said he could do 7 hours of this with him.

    Howard said Bob had something to do with the Chris Farley life coach bit. Bob said Bob Odenkirk had left the show and they put it on and put him in charge of it. He said Bob wrote the sketch. He said he helped with the table smash thing. He said that was the first time that Farley ever fell. He said that in the dance sketch he wasn't a clumsy guy. He said hew as a fat guy going for it in an amazing way.

    Howard said the best thing he ever saw Chris do was when he was on Letterman and he came in doing somersaults. He said he never got to meet him but he thought he was great.

    Howard said before they run out of time he wants to talk about some of the things he's working on. He said that he's got a son with Autism and he has devoted his life to raising money for Autism. He said that's tough. He said he knows people who have kids who are autistic. He said the toughest thing to wonder about is who is going to take care of your child when you're gone. Bob said that there are people who have severe autism and have high needs. He said his son is non verbal for the most part. He said what's complicated is that autism covers this enormous spectrum. He said what they're learning is that you just have to acknowledge that there are people with autism who are able to function and contribute and they have to live with a stigma of being though of as lesser and that's not right. He said we're all trying to be very vigilant of that now.

    Howard said he wants to talk about this fund raiser. Bob said it's called Color the Spectrum. He said he and his wife started this about 18 years ago. He said they wanted to start it and not have it about finding a cure. He said when they saw what was happening to their son their first thoughts were that they might want to find a cure. He said that there were a lot of people talking about a cure but he and his wife wanted to help their son get through it and communicate his needs. He said they wanted to know if he was okay. He said they had a lot of trouble getting him into school because there's such a shortage of that.

    Howard asked how expensive it is to prepare for the care of his son. Bob said he'll never stop working. He said he has to keep working because he knows that his son will need help all the way through his life. Howard asked how expensive that is. Bob said it's more than it should be. He said the services are lacking. He said they have very kind people working with his son. He said his son got COVID and the people are so dedicated that they stayed with him. He said they all asked to be a part of that care. He said a lot of people assume that Daniel can be talked about like he's not there but that drives him nuts. Bob said that they called it a disease when they started out but then they changed it to a disorder. He said now they call it a condition. He said that he wanted people to understand that Daniel is a whole person and not just someone who has a disorder and he's incapable of connecting with people. He said he knows that Daniel will have a job and he'll be happy. He said he wanted people to know that these people are whole individuals and they should be able to have the best life possible. He said they have feelings and needs and you have to remember that.

    Howard asked if Daniel was his first born. Bob said he was. He said that they didn't have children for 10 years after that. He said they were so focused on his needs that they didn't want to have other kids. He said they had so much work to do with him. He said it was something they had no interest in focusing on anyone else.

    Howard asked how hard it was on his marriage. Bob said it made his marriage stronger. He said he and his wife were in it together. He said that she helps moms who have kids who were diagnosed. He said that one of their twins has diabetes and they have to get up in the middle of the night to take care of that. He said she's his hero. He said his son is the greatest gift of his life. He said he has learned so much from him.

    Howard said his heard goes out to him. He said he knows other people with autism and the parents worry about what's going to happen when they're gone.

    Howard said the benefit is called Color the Spectrum. Bob said that the host is Jimmy Kimmel and Mark Rober who is a wonderful kid too. He said they have a lot of good people on the show. He said it'll be live streamed. Howard read the list of people who are involved with the benefit.

    Howard asked how you see this. Bob said it'll be on Mark Rober's channel on YouTube on Friday night at 8pm eastern time. He said it'll be live streamed and they'll be doing a lot of silly stuff. He said it will be a lot of fun.

    Howard said Bob also has a new TV show. He said that's on FOX Thursday night. He said the show is called ''Let's Be Real'' and it's on at 8:30. Howard said he saw some of the show and it's remarkably great. He said they have some great puppets. Bob said he has some great writers on the show. He said a lot of them came up with some great material. He said it's all in that silly humor. Bob said it's actually on at 9:30 as far as he knows.

    Howard said his heart goes out to him with the autistic child. He said he's been a great father and he knows how much he's put into that. He said he's a great guy and he wishes him luck with the FOX series. He said you want to appreciate him. He said he's the best. Howard wrapped up and let Bob go. Howard said he has a million stories but they could only get to a few. robins said they have so much more to talk about. Howard said he had a lot more to talk about with the Dana Carvey Show and all of that.

    Howard said that Bob is the writer and producer of this ''Let's Be Real'' show. He said the puppets are amazing. He said he can't even describe what they look like. He said it's very well done. He said the puppets look like the people they're supposed to be.

    Howard said they ran out of time but he wanted to talk to bob about all of this. He said they had controversy about the voice of Kamala Harris and it's so involved. Howard said he should have him back on to talk about this stuff. He said he got a note saying that Bob had to let Triumph out to pee during the interview.

    Howard said that the show is on at 9:30 but the FOX web site says 8:30. He said it's not good when the network doesn't even know when it's on. Howard said they're going to go since it's getting late. He said George Takei will be joining them next Wednesday. He said everyone loves George. Robin said that's great. Howard wrapped up and ended the show around 10:45am.

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