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-- Tuesday, June 27, 2017 --

  • High Pitch Erik And His Friend Jolie Visit. 06/27/17. 7:00am
    Show opening bits and songs included: Frank Sinatra Jr. performing ''Stink Finger'' from the TV show Son of the Beach, Don Felder performing ''Hotel California'' in the Howard Stern Show studio.

    Howard stated the show talking about the fake Joan Rivers opening theme song they had playing. He had a clip of fake Joan announcing they have New Kids on the Block coming in today. Howard said they've reformed and they're on tour. Howard said they're playing in Brooklyn somewhere. They're playing at the Barclay center. Howard said Donnie Wahlberg will be in. He said Jenny McCarthy has a show there and the two of them are still making out in the halls up there. Howard said they love it. Howard said he has to ask Donnie about that. Howard said they're way into each other. Robin said you don't have to make out in public. Howard said if he was with Jenny he'd make out in public. Howard said Donnie accidentally came on Cousin Brucie the other day. Howard did his Cousin Brucie voice after that. He said Human Newman got some shrapnel from that too. He said he loves that name and Hollywood Hamilton too. Howard said he heard that Donnie and Jenny still facetime all the time when they're apart.

    Howard said he's going to make High Pitch Erik's day. He said he's been there all morning. Howard said he's trying to get his stomach stapled but he has to lose a few pounds on his own first.

    Erik came in and said he has some news for Howard too. Howard said he has some news for him. He asked if he wanted to go first. Erik told Howard to go first. Howard said he's going to let him sit in there and watch New Kids perform in there today. Erik said he loves New Kids on the Block. Howard said he went to a concert and then went home and jerked off. Erik said he got to announce them on stage last year. He gets to do it again this year. Howard asked him not to jerk off this time.

    Erik thanked Howard for that. Howard said he's a fan of the show and he's a good sport so he deserves something. Robin said Erik is wearing a belt and she'd like to know where he found that. Howard said Erik looks good today. Erik said he looks like John Stamos. Howard said yeah, if he was a blimp.

    Howard asked why he's dressed nice today. Erik said he had a surprise so he dressed nice. Howard said this is a good look for him. Robin asked why he has to lose weight. Howard said they'll get to that.

    Howard asked Erik how many New Kids songs he knows. Erik said when he went to Atlanta to meet his friend Jolie they were doing Karaoke to New Kids songs. Howard played a song for Erik and asked him to name it. Erik didn't know the name of the song. It was called ''Please Don't Go Girl.'' Howard played a few more and Erik knew some of the songs. Howard said he didn't think he'd be able to do it. Howard said they're going to perform ''The Right stuff'' acoustically today.

    Erik said he was home yesterday and he was so bored out of his mind. He said he opened a jar of Honey Roasted Peanuts and turned on Netflix. He said he had to watch season 6 of Blue Bloods. He said he ate half the jar of nuts. Howard said that's very fattening. Howard said he has the life. He gets to sit home doing that. Robin said he could go out and get a job. Erik said he can come over and play video games. Howard said he doesn't like video games. Howard said maybe he'll come over to see where he lives. He said he's not going to do that.

    Howard said he has to get to this diet thing. Howard said Erik lost like 100 pounds and he was doing good. He gained it all back. Erik said he saw a nutritionist. He said he 3 slices of pizza the other day.

    Howard said if Erik gets this Gastric Sleeve he has to lose some weight on his own. Erik said the doctor says he's a candidate. Howard said they have to see if he has some will power so he has to lose a few pounds. Robin said he's already failed. Howard said he has to prove he can eat on his own. Erik said he has yogurt in the morning and he has turkey burgers for lunch with no roll. He said he doesn't have any sides. Robin asked where he gets the burgers from. Erik said he gets them from the grocery store.

    Howard asked what his pants size is. Erik said it's 62. Gary said he's back on soda big time too. Erik said it's diet soda and diet Snapple. Howard said they say that's worse than regular. He said they say you gain more weight doing that.

    Erik said he had to go for blood work yesterday. He has to go in for an endoscopy in August. Howard asked what he weighs. Erik said he thinks he's in the 370s. Howard said he has to lose a few pounds and get his endoscopy. He asked when the operation would happen. Erik said in November or December. Howard said he wants to see skinny Erik. Erik said Jolie wants to see him when he gets the surgery.

    Howard said that's the other thing going on. He said Erik has a friend named Jolie. He said he's like Erik Clooney. Howard said he met her on Twitter and she took mercy on him. Howard said she lives in Atlanta and as soon as she started talking to him Erik wanted to go down and live with her. Howard said he went down and visited with Gonzo Shitcock and he cried when he had to leave. Howard said Erik is in love with her. Erik said she's a wonderful friend. Howard said she's a woman he hasn't scared away yet.

    Howard had the guys bring Jolie in. Howard said he has to meet her. Howard said he heard she's normal looking. Jolie came in and Howard asked how she got to know Erik. Jolie said that she started following him on Twitter. Howard asked how she met him because she must know she's flirting with disaster. Howard said everyone he meets ends up getting threatened. Jolie said that she followed him on Twitter and he was on her inbox and DM right away. She said he asked to come down to visit right away.

    Howard asked Erik why he does that. Erik said he just wants to go visit. Howard asked how long she waited to let him come down. Jolie said about 6 months or so. Erik said he did a birthday party in February. He said Joey Boots hired him to do a thing with him. Howard asked how he's doing with Joey Boots being gone. Erik said that he misses him. He said it's hard without him. Howard said he used to tour with him. Howard asked if food eases the pain. Erik said maybe. He said Jolie sounds like Joey a bit. He asked Erik if he has tried to contact Joey at all through a psychic. Erik said he hasn't.

    Jolie said that Erik wants to put cameras in his apartment and his lawyer wants him to do this. She said he thinks all of the money he gets from people watching it will go to the lawyer and he'll trust him with the money. Erik said he has a YouTube channel called Real High Pitch Erik. He said they're going to have the cameras up and he wants to get 1000 subscribers. Howard asked what they're going to see him doing. Erik said they can see him eat and sleep. Howard asked if he beats off in there. Erik said he doesn't. He said he does that in the bathroom. Jolie said he had to change floors because of that. Erik said he needs 1000 subscribers before Friday.

    Howard said Jolie is afraid because she doesn't think he knows what he's doing business wise. Jolie said she thinks she's the only person he'll listen to. Howard asked if he comes on to her. Jolie said he has. She said he'll say that he hopes he gets a special kiss from someone. She said she won't do that. She said she'll kiss on the cheek but not really. She said he goes straight for the mouth. Jolie said he was told not to kiss when his lips are wet so he dries them before he goes in for a kiss. He said he'll use a towel. Howard asked if she knows then that he's coming in for a kiss. Jolie said she does.

    Howard said Erik is into guys and attractive women. Howard asked what she thinks about his sexuality. Jolie said she has asked about it between her and Donnie and he picked her. She said she thinks he's very lonely and any type of contact would be acceptable. Howard asked if Erik has any extra blood coming out of his gums today. He said his teeth are very yellow. Erik said he brushed them.

    Howard asked Erik if he would choose taking a kiss from Jolie on the lips or watch the New Kids on the Block perform live. Erik said he's rather see acoustic Donnie Wahlberg. Erik said he can always kiss Jolie later. Howard said he gave him a choice and he made it.

    Howard took a call from a guy who said he had the gastric sleeve in 2014. He said he eats protein, veggies and water. Erik said he was told he has to drink protein shakes. The caller said he was on a month long diet before and after the surgery. Howard said it sounds like Erik is going to need to do a lot. The caller said he's lost 120 pounds already. He said if he sticks to it he can do it. Howard said Erik's going to eat shitty food. Howard said it's not going to make a difference. Jolie said she asked Erik how he's doing because he has to keep a log. Howard asked if he lies in his log. Erik said he'll tell him off the air. Howard asked what he's going to tell him. Erik said he has to save it for off the air.

    Jolie said Erik told her that he had some peanuts and pizza. She said he told her it's all about honesty. She said they want to see if he can do it.

    Howard asked Jolie what's up with her. He said Erik wanted to move in with her. Jolie said he's visited her twice now. She said it's always Erik and someone else. Howard said it must be like a care taker. Erik said he doesn't need a caretaker. Erik said he did the dishes for her at her house. He said he did all of them in the dishwashers. Howard asked if he clogged the toilet at her house. Jolie said she doesn't think so. She said he uses the bathroom on the other side of the house.

    Jolie said that Erik had to use a bathroom when he visited recently and they were out at this little place. She said that she was worried that they were going to be in trouble if he shit in there. Erik said he did but it wasn't big and smelly.

    Jolie said that she works with brain damaged people so she knows how to work with people. She said she has to redirect Erik at times. She said Erik feels they need to text and talk every morning and throughout the day. Jolie said it's insane how much he texts her. She said sometimes she writes him back and she has to ask him to stop. Howard asked if he keeps going. Jolie said he'll say he's doing better but then he texts and tells her that he's doing better. Howard asked Erik why he texts her when she tells him not to. Erik said he thinks he's doing better. Jolie said she'll shut him down when she says she's not going to talk to him. That scares him.

    Howard asked if it's true that Erik threatens to kill himself if she won't talk to him. Erik said he doesn't mean it when he says it. Jolie said she had a friend who killed herself years ago and she does worry about him when he says that.

    Howard asked Jolie if Erik is going to be able to handle it if some guy wants to date her. Jolie said Erik does cock block her often. Erik said he thinks he does. Erik said he does that.

    Howard asked what he does. Jolie said that Erik wants to know any guy who is in contact with her. She said that he reached out to her ex-husband. She said that she had to apologize for that. Howard asked why he would do that. Erik said that he said to Jolie that he saw he works in radio and he does a sports show. He said he was going to call in and talk about sports. Howard asked why her ex-husband though. Howard asked if he's attracted to him too. Erik said no.

    Howard asked what Erik has learned today. Erik said he has to ease up on his texts. Howard said he has learned. Howard asked Jolie if she thinks he's going to cut back. Jolie said maybe for a day. Howard asked if she thinks he'll back off. Jolie said she's not sure about that. She said Erik wants to have a baby with her. Howard said he can barely take care of a dog.

    Erik said they went to a baseball game in Pittsburgh and they saw a cute baby. Erik said Jolie said she wishes she had a baby and he told her they should adopt a baby. Howard asked if he thinks he could pass the adoption test. Erik said absolutely. He said he'd be a great dad. Howard asked if he's ever changed a diaper. Erik said he has. He said give him a test.

    Howard said he has a doctor on the phone and he wants to perform the surgery on Erik. Howard picked up and Steve Nowicki was playing the part of the doctor who said they should staple his mouth shut with a nail gun. Erik said no thank you to that. Jolie said she thinks it could work. The doctor asked if Jolie is free tonight for dinner. Jolie said she would like to go out. Howard asked Erik if he'd be okay with that. Erik said he would.

    Erik said he was going to get his nipple pierced in Atlanta when he was there. Howard said he has to lose a couple hundred pounds before he does something like that. Howard asked if she's seen him with his shirt off. Jolie said she has seen him with his shirt off. She said he hasn't really seen her yet. She said that she did put her foot on him down in Atlanta and his nipples got hard. She said she was on the other end of the couch and she put her foot on him. She said she was drinking so that might have been why.

    Erik said Gonzo was supposed to come to Atlanta and he missed his flight so he was alone with Jolie. Howard said it's fascinating. He asked Erik why he has Gonzo go with him because he's a good looking guy. Erik said that he thinks Gonzo and Jolie look good together.

    Jolie said Erik had some gift cards and they went driving around to find an Applebees so he could use the card. She said they had to drive pretty far to find one. Howard asked what he had to eat. Erik had bacon mac and cheese. Jolie said that he double dips and she can't do that. Howard said that means he dips into stuff after taking bites. Erik said he has a habit of doing that.

    Howard said this doesn't sound like it's going to last forever. Erik said he's not going to ruin it. Howard said he has chased away other girls. Jolie said she thinks that he's afraid of her and he doesn't threaten her. Erik said that Elephant Boy has started in with him again and the girl who was with him last time is pregnant and he asked her if it's his baby. Howard said maybe it was his baby. Erik said it wasn't. He said that girl threatened him and his other friend too. Howard said this is very complex. Robin said she loves that he has all of this going on.

    Howard said Elephant Boy and High Pitch Erik will be in tomorrow for the Bobo Walk of Shame. Howard said Elephant Boy and Erik will be out ringing the bell and saying ''shame'' on the street. Howard said it's going to be interesting to have them out there in front of the FOX News building.

    Howard said Jolie seems like a nice person. He asked if Erik scares her at all. She said she could take him in a fight. she said she'd fuck him up if he ever tried something. She said she knows good ol' fashioned punching and stuff. She said she's not afraid of him. She said she'll do whatever it takes. She said she'll use a frying pan. Erik said never fuck with a chick. Jolie said he's fucked with a lot and he hasn't learned his lesson. Erik said that's because half of them have used him to come on the show. Howard said she might end up being Mrs. High Pitch Erik. Jolie said sometimes it's right in front of you and you never know. Howard asked if she'd ever have pity sex with him. Jolie said no. She said she has a friend who offered to do it and he turned her down. Jolie said she's very pretty and young and she was drunk. She said that Erik reaches out to every one of her friends and she came in with her dress off with her boobs out and sat on him. She said she tried to kiss him and she wanted to give him some love. Howard asked what happened. Erik said she had a guy with her. Jolie said they weren't together. She said she was a hot 27 year old. Erik said it was Jolie's friend. Howard said she's like Mother Theresa. Howard said he should have done it. Erik said it was at her house and he had to respect her. Howard said if all of the New Kids on the Block were in the house and Donnie sat on his lap wouldn't something happen. Erik said he loves Donnie. Howard said he wouldn't care how many guys were in the room.

    Howard asked if the friend was going to have sex with Erik. Jolie said she thinks she was going to ride him like a stripper would. She said she thinks that Erik came in his pants once at a strip club. Howard asked if Erik is insane. Howard asked if he wasn't attracted to her. Erik said he was nervous to do it there. Howard said she must have felt like a loser after that. Jolie said she hasn't seen her in a while so she has to check on her.

    Howard said he heard that this woman Debbie the Cum Lady wants to do Erik. Erik said her name sounds gross. He said that he'll let her do it but only if Donnie watches. Howard said he'll show Erik a picture of her later. Howard said Jolie's friend wanted to straddle him and he turned her down. Howard said that's very gay. Erik said he's not gay. Howard said Erik wants to blow Donnie though. Howard said that's gay. Erik said he's not gay. Howard said he is because he wants Donnie in his mouth. Erik said he's straight. Howard said he wants to fuck Donnie but not a naked girl on his lap. Jolie said her friend was going to French kiss him and he didn't want to do it. Howard asked what that tells you. Erik said maybe he was tired that night. Howard said that's fair enough. He said he hasn't gotten laid in 25 years and he was too tired.

    Howard said Erik only wants cock in his mouth. Erik said he only wants Donnie or John Stamos... or Drew Carrey or Wayne Brady. Howard said he's in love with Mike the weatherman. Erik said Mike Wood is great. Robin asked where all of the women are. Erik said he saw Megyn Kelly on TV on the way over this morning. He said he likes her.

    Gary said Erik goes to visit Mike Wood all the time. Erik said he likes Megyn Kelly too. He said he loves the woman on the Today show with Matt Lauer too.

    Howard took a call from a guy who said they have to put a picture of Jolie up on the web site. He asked if she's hot. Howard said she is. The caller said Erik is a fat bastard and he's disgusting. Howard said he has to let Erik and Jolie go for now. He said they'll be in later during the New Kids segment. Erik said he'll be 150 pounds lighter after the surgery. Howard said not if he keeps up with this. He said he has to cut back on eating even after the surgery. Howard said he's going to bust open that sleeve. Erik said he won't. Howard said he knew someone who ate through one. Erik said he won't.

    Howard took a call from the guys in the back who had a guy doing a Megyn Kelly impression. He broke into his male voice from the woman's voice. Howard said he questions if this is really Megyn Kelly. Erik said he doesn't think so. Erik asked what she thinks of Alex Jones. She kept going from female to male voice. Howard wished her luck over at NBC.

    Howard said he loves Erik but he has to take a break. He said he has to talk about Jeff the Vomit Guy. Erik said that guy is nuts, right? Howard laughed and said he is. Howard said he has a lot more to get to.

    Erik said he might have to talk to Debbie the Cum Lady. Howard said maybe they can get her on tomorrow. Howard asked Gary if they can get her on now. Gary said he doesn't think that would be difficult. Howard said this woman visits like 20 guys a day and swallows their cum. He said she's pretty attractive too. Gary said Erik acts like he has choices. Erik said he'd like to talk to her. Howard said it's getting late and he may have to save it for tomorrow.

    Jolie said she's a guaranteed blow job so Erik should do it. Erik said he did a porno and it took him forever to cum. Howard said he thinks he'd cum in a second if it was Donnie blowing him. Jolie said that Erik is on a lot of medication and that may slow things down. Howard said Debbie the Cum Lady is like a vampire so she'd be able to get it out of him. Erik said there's a stripper who rubbed some oil on his balls at a strip club and it made them tingle. Howard said he has to got to that strip club. Jolie said she has to go to that club too.

    Howard had Debbie the Cum Lady on the phone. Howard said they call her the cum queen. Debbie said she blows 4 guys a day and 2 loads each. She said she gets 8 loads a day. She said she has one guy who stays with her so she does him a few times a day. She said she has to do it and she needs it like a food supplement. Howard said she was on the show in 2011 and she goes to a lot of guys to blow them at their office. Debbie said she'll do them at work or after work. Howard asked what Erik likes about this. Erik just said ''Wow!'' Howard asked if Debbie has the right Erik. She said she does. Howard said this is High Pitch Erik. Debbie said he has very strong sex appeal. She said she has seen his picture and heard his voice.

    Erik asked what she does when she thinks about him. Debbie said she lays Erik down and kisses his inner thighs and she works up to his cock. She said she rubs her tits on him and then kisses him on her way down to his ass. She said that she'll tickle his prostate and work her way back up to his cock and she'll have him fuck her face really hard. She said she'll make him do that until he cums. Howard had to explain to Erik what he'd be doing to her. He didn't understand ''fuck her face.''

    Erik was wondering if they could do it at her house. He said his place is too small. Howard said maybe he can do it in the Access-a-Ride car. Erik said they won't let that happen. Howard said he thinks that Debbie is going to be in New York in December and she'd let Shuli cover it. Howard said they won't film it but they will cover it. Howard had a picture of Debbie that he showed to Erik. Erik said she looks like Farrah Fawcett a little bit.

    Howard asked Debbie a question but she was gone. Howard said it says she's still on the line. Howard said maybe she lost her connection. Howard asked Erik what he thinks. Erik said they should set it up.

    Howard said he has someone on the phone who says he'll blow Erik too. He had Sour Shoes doing his George Takei impression saying he was going to come down right now. He said he'd lay him on the bed just like Debbie. He said he'd drain him dry. He said he'd give him a nice prostate exam too. Howard said he's very gracious. George did a New Kids song for Erik with his laugh. He said he loves Erik ''you rascal you.'' Howard let Sour George go a short time later. Howard asked him to leave them with a song. Sour broke into a song and Howard let him go.

    Howard had Debbie back on the phone. Erik said he was getting hard hearing Debbie talking earlier. Howard said he has to save his load for her. Howard said his pants size is 62. Debbie said she loves a big man. Howard said his IQ and waist size are almost the same. He said if he got to 66 they'd be the same. Howard said they're almost there. Debbie said Erik is perfect. She said she needs to have him. She said she'll make him feel like he's never felt before.

    Howard asked Debbie how many guys she's going to blow today. She said one guy just left and she'll have more at lunch and tonight. She said she needs to get 8 a day. She said one guy was there this morning. Howard asked how fast she makes him cum. Debbie said she likes a one minute man. Howard said Erik takes time because of his medication.

    Howard said it really is a man's world. Robin said Debbie is into Erik. She said it's not a forced thing. She's seeking Erik. Howard asked if she'd ever blow a horse. Debbie said she hasn't gotten into that. She said it's only men.

    Howard said they'll see if they can line this up with Debbie and Erik. Howard asked if she worries about sexually transmitted diseases. Debbie said not at all. Howard asked Erik if he's worried. Erik said no. Howard let Debbie go. He said he's worried about Erik and diseases. Erik said she needs it and wants it. Howard said he doesn't want Erik to get anything. Erik said his mouth isn't going on any dick. Howard said he has to explain it off the air. He said there's always a chance. Erik said he can clean himself off after. Howard said that doesn't help with herpes.

    Howard said that Erik has to think this through. Robin said Erik takes a chance every day. Howard said he has to consider that stuff. Erik said ''right.'' Howard said Debbie has blown other guys under the table at restaurants. Erik said she's blown guys at their office on Wall Street.

    Jolie said that Erik said he would never go down on a girl so she could never be with him. Howard said he has warned him about that. He said he'd be getting laid every day if he wasn't for him. Howard said he thinks condoms are a good thing. Howard said maybe Erik can cum in a condom and she can drink it out of that. Howard said he's like a dad with a very troubled son.

    Howard took a call from Mariann from Brooklyn who said that she's been friends with Erik for 18 years now. She said she's worried about the surgery. she said Erik needed this today. She said she did a live Baba Booey on WPIX yesterday. She said she did it for him. She screamed that last part out so Howard hung up on her.

    Howard took a call from a guy who did a bong hit and started to say something but Howard cut him off and went to break a short time later.


  • Jeff The Vomit Guy Update. 06/27/17. 8:20am
    After the break they played a High Pitch Erik song parody and Howard came back while that was playing. Howard said they've fallen far behind with the Erik stories. Howard said everyone loves Erik.

    Howard said he has to get to Jeff the Vomit Guy. He said Jeff was down there complaining he doesn't get air time anymore. Howard said he likes to hear him but they've heard him over and over again over the years. He said Jeff wanted to do a solicit on the air and they had this thing recorded and it slipped his mind. Howard said he was going to play it at some point and Jeff got very upset he didn't play it. Howard played the solicit where Jeff asked to be a human toilet at a party if anyone is looking for that.

    Howard said Jeff got very upset that it never aired. He said he must have figured he'd get contacted if they played it. Howard said they got an angry voicemail from Jeff about that. Howard played the voicemail where Jeff asked if there's anything going on that he can get involved with. Jeff said he thought he was going to have something going on a few weeks before. Jeff asked if it's him and if he's not wanted or appreciated on the show. Jeff said maybe nothing is wrong and they're just busy. He said he has a lot of time and he's not getting any positive feedback. Howard said Jeff got upset and he's not getting any activity.

    Howard said that's the grossest solicit yet. Howard said he guarantees no one will be in touch with them over this. Howard said Shuli called him back and explained that they're very busy and Howard isn't a ''vomit agent'' so he isn't responsible for finding women to vomit on him.

    Howard said Jeff told Shuli about some guy he knows who had a vomit web site and they go and jerk off together but not in a gay way. Howard played the clip where Jeff talked about going to this guy's house and they go to a motel room together and watch women throwing up. Shuli asked if they pleasure themselves. Jeff said that's the whole point. He said they may do it at different times.

    Howard said he knows guys who golf but these guys go to a room and jerk off while watching vomit porn. He said that's the same type of thing.

    Howard said he's now played the solicit and the voicemail. He wished him luck finding someone. Howard said those two guys are two disgusting peas in a pod. Howard went to break after that.


  • Howard Takes Some Calls And Reads Some Email. 06/27/17. 8:35am
    After the break they played a phony phone call the guys made to a guy using clips of Ben Stiller, Ron Howard, John Goodman, Kirstie Alley, Kenny Loggins, Kevin Cronin, Raquel Welch, Lady Gaga, Sharon Osbourne and Tony Orlando to wish the guy a happy birthday. They also played Joe Cocker's ''With a Little Help From My Friends'' and a Rang Richardson bit that the guys did on the street asking people to help with a fake news report.

    Howard came back and said he loves that Rang Richardson. He took a call from a guy who asked if JD would be willing to auction off 2 tickets to his wedding for fans who want to go. Howard asked JD if he'd do that. Robin said it might pay for the whole wedding. Howard asked JD if he's there. JD didn't hear what was going on. JD said that's not happening after he heard the offer.

    Howard said the fans gave a lot of fabulous feedback about Jimmy Iovine yesterday. He read through some of that email.

    Howard said he's thinking of bringing his FOX News musical to Broadway and people are excited about that. Howard read through some of that email too. He had people who hate musicals saying they'd go see it. Howard also had people who love musicals saying they'd go. Robin said that has to be what they're looking for. Howard made up a song to the tune of a song from Rent.

    Howard said he said he wasn't going to talk about this musical anymore. He said he's giving away too much. Howard said Robin was supposed to stop him.

    Howard said he has gotten a lot of condolences from people about Dr. Sarno. Howard said Dr. Sarno was his hero. He read a few emails about Sarno passing away.

    Howard said people still love when Fred plays Jackie's laugh in Robin's news about tragedies. Howard said they got some email about that. Howard also had some email about his lack of traveling and other things they talked about yesterday.

    Howard said everyone loves the Ronnie having sex with his mom prank call. Howard read some of that mail and some about King of All Blacks and Mariann from Brooklyn. Howard said that's just a smattering of email they receive daily.

  • Flat Chested Robin. 06/27/17. 8:50am
    Howard said over the years people have commented on Robin's breasts and she's so womanly. Howard said they wonder if Robin would be a different woman if she was flat chested. Howard asked what she would have been like if she was flat chested. Howard said on the phone he has flat chested Robin. He picked up the guys had clips of Robin when she's been angry. They had Robin getting upset and saying she's angry because she has no breasts. Howard asked Flat Chested Robin to sing. They had a professional singer singing so it sounded like Flat Robin was really talented. Howard asked if she's ever tried Ayahuasca. She said she hasn't because her tits are small, not her brain. She said she is into Lenny Dykstra but he thinks she's gross with her tiny tits.

    Howard said there has to be someone who wants to bang her. Flat Robin said she has one guy. It was Ronnie.

    Howard spent a little more time talking to Flat Chested Robin. Howard said he hooked up with regular Robin. He said that he hasn't hooked up with Flat Chested Robin. She said she doesn't hook up with guys with small dicks. Flat Robin was also cutting down Robin's wind chimes. They had Robin yelling at Robin about her stupid wind chimes and how people are trying to sleep.

    Howard said next week they'll have flat chested Jon Hein on the phone. Howard said Robin's life would have been very different if she was flat chested. Howard went to break a short time later. - As Seen on Howard Stern

  • New Kids On The Block Perform Live. 06/27/17. 9:00am
    After the break they played a phony phone call the guys made to an internet radio show using clips of Ronnie the Limo Driver talking about wanting to bang his mom. They also played Don Henley performing ''The Boys of Summer'' in the Howard Stern Show studio. They played a Scott the Engineer song parody and a JD Harmeyer sex tip as they were coming back.

    Howard came back and said he has New Kids on the Block in the studio. Howard asked if they're best friends. One of the guys said they're lovers from time to time. Howard said he didn't know they were at the Barclay Center tonight. He asked if that's going to be a lot of work. They said they were off yesterday. Howard asked if the tour is big. They said it's 49 cities and it's big.

    Howard said when the band was formed they had this guy Maurice Star come up with it. He started New Edition and produced their album. Joey told Howard about Maurice and how he came up with the idea.

    Howard said when they first started out they thought they were a black group. Donnie said they were marketed at a black audience but they didn't respond to them. He said that they became a big pop act when the white kids found out they were white.

    Howard said he can't imagine someone approaching him at 14 and asking him to be in a band. Donnie said he Maurice wasn't doing that much at the time so he was less rich than he was. Donnie said they were all bussed to school at the time and they were going to a predominantly black neighborhood. He said he had no problem going to Maurice's house. He said that being bussed saved his life. Robin asked if he was performing somewhere. Donnie said he was. Howard said Boston is so racially confused. He said you have black people living in Roxbury and white people screaming about them. He said it's confusing. Joey said it sticks out sometimes. He said that his parents grew up in Roxbury and all of that sticks out more when something bad happens. Robin said it's not just Boston. Howard said he thinks it is weird because Boston seems so liberal.

    Howard asked Donnie was the first one to meet Maurice. Howard said he was the guy who put them together. They said he wasn't even a manager. He was a creator. Howard asked how he found them. Donnie said he had a friend who lived near Maurice who was looking to find people for a band. Donnie said they told this woman about him and she took him to see Maurice. He said he lived in a Brownstone and it was all decrepit. He said it was like the Munsters house. He said he wasn't scared but he thought it was bullshit that he thought they were going to be big stars. He said about a week later Maurice played bass for Peter Wolf on Saturday Night Live. He said that he was legit when he saw that. Joey said that Maurice is very talented. Howard asked if he's still around. Donnie said he's around but he had a stroke recently. Howard asked if they're still friendly. Joey said they love him like a brother. He said his ego was a bit much to handle but they like the guy.

    Howard asked if Maurice gave up on them. Donnie said he wants to debunk some things. He said that his brother Mark wanted to steal cars so he dropped out of the band. He said he was in it for about a month. Donnie said he really wanted to just go steal cars and hang with his friends.

    Howard asked if Donnie told him that Mark should stick with it. Donnie said he did. He said he remembers the day he quit and how he didn't want to go anymore. He said he told him he had to go in and tell them he quit. He said Mark was probably 13 at the time.

    Howard said that they were having a tremendous career so did Mark think he made a mistake. Donnie said not at all. He said they'd all go buy cars and stuff and he'd just give it to Mark. He said that Mark loved that he was famous. Howard said he didn't have a brother so he's glad about that. He said if he was the younger brother he'd think he was an idiot for not sticking with it. Donnie said Mark was happy about it.

    Howard said that Donnie can rap, sing and dance. Donnie said he brought Jordan and Danny into it. He said Jordan brought Jonathan in. Howard asked if the parents were worried about it. They said it was good that they were just doing something and staying out of trouble.

    Howard said their first album didn't do much. Howard asked if Maurice almost bailed on them. Donnie said the record company almost did but not Maurice. Howard said they used to go to prisons to perform. They said they did.

    Howard asked why they would stick young boys in a prison. He asked whose idea that was. Donnie said his older brother was in some of those prisons. He said all of his buddies told them they'd be okay. Howard asked what his brother did. Donnie said he had jacked everything in the world. He said he was at their third prison appearance. He said the first one they did was a local radio station. He said they smuggled in a carton of cigarettes and they went crazy when they threw them out to them. The guards were pissed though. Donnie said every show they did they had to figure out how to win over the audience. Howard asked how long it took for the second album to come out. Donnie said it was like 2 and a half years.

    Howard asked if Mark was good at stealing cars. Donnie said he always got caught. He said that he learned from that. He said they always got caught. He said he learned from that. Donnie said he never did it because he didn't want to get busted.

    Joey said when he was 14 he went to see a movie and the next thing they knew they were all leaving. He said some people who had stolen a car were driving around and they were stripping it down. He said Jordan told him to just be cool while it was happening. Howard said he stole a tie tack once but that's it.

    Howard said they're really seasoned guys and they are out performing and working this thing out. Then their second album takes off. Donnie said they were marketing them to urban radio. He said they called it Black Radio at the time. He said that one pop station played their first single. He said if that didn't hit then they'd be plumbers and all of that. Howard played some of their first big hit ''Go Girl'' and Donnie said they got to be on Tiffany's tour after that.

    Joey said they would walk the streets of New York trying to get people to let them play. Joey said they were nervous to play in front of all white audiences because they had never done that.

    Howard said they go from prisons to doing these performances. Howard said he's seeing that they all have their hair. Donnie said it's the miracle of Propecia. Joey said that one of them is married to Jenny McCarthy too. Howard said he heard that Donnie and Jenny are still making out in the halls there. Donnie said that he loves her to death. Howard said he hears about them making out all the time. Donnie said he's higher in his 40s than she is. He said they have both been married and they have been through a lot and they're trying to get it right. He said they keep it hot at all times.

    Howard said it's amazing that they're still face timing all the time too. Donnie said the kids think it's enough already too. Howard asked if they have sex in the building. Donnie said he has a nice trailer on his day job for having sex. He works on Blue Bloods so he has a trailer for that.

    Howard said Donnie is really busy. Donnie said he loves music and there's nothing like it. He said they do it all on their own now. He said they make all of the decisions so they're doing fine. He said they're doing it right and it's way better than the first time.

    Howard said they have a camera watching them change during their show. Howard asked if they get nude. They said they get partially nude. Howard said the fans go nuts for that.

    Howard said they had a lot of hits. Howard played some of their hit songs. They talked about how things got nutso after some of those songs. Joey said that there was so much going on and they were so busy. Howard said he can't imagine what was tough about it. Joey said it was the schedule. He said they went from trying to get on stage to playing Giant Stadium. Howard asked if it all came at once. Joey said it did. He said he was 15-17 when it was all coming at him. He said there was in fighting going on and it didn't have the same magic that it used to.

    Howard played ''Hanging' Tough'' and said that was like an anthem song. Howard said they were all big hits. Donnie said he thinks that sold 15 million world wide. He said they wanted that to be the Celtics theme song so they could perform at games.

    Howard said they recorded their album at Maurice's house. Joey said the house was just 2x4s. They said if you singled out the vocals you'd hear dogs barking and sirens going in the background.

    Howard said the guys are going to perform ''You Got It (The Right Stuff)'' acoustically. He asked if they've ever done that before. They haven't. Howard said they should give it a try. Howard had them perform the song.

    After the song Howard asked if Erik is singing. High Pitch Erik was sitting in and said he wasn't singing. Howard asked if that freaked the guys out. They said no. Howard said Erik wanted to see them perform. Erik said he announced them last year. Donnie said he did introduce Donnie Wahlberg and New Kids on the Block. Howard said you don't do that. Joey said he's just giving him a hard time.

    Howard said Jordan looked pissed about him coming in. Jordan said he was perplexed. Howard said Erik and Jolie can leave now. Donnie said he sees him all the time and he's an official background on Blue Bloods.

    Howard said Erik is in love with Donnie and he once came in his pants after hugging him. Donnie said that Erik walked up to him in the bathroom and said he wanted to be on Blue Bloods. He didn't know at the time he was masturbating to it. Jordan didn't know that's what he was doing. Howard said he does jerk off to the show. Erik said he likes when he chases the bad guys and sits at the desk and interrogates people. He said he's tough with those guys. Donnie said Erik is in those scenes now. He said Erik may be masturbating on state. He said he actually does good on the show.

    Howard said Donnie says that people ask him about Erik all the time. Donnie said for the last year and a half people ask how High Pitch is. He said even at the concerts the wives bring their husbands and every one of them asks where High Pitch is. Howard said he's really linked to Donnie now.

    Erik said if he announces them this year he'd just introduce them as New Kids on the Block. Howard said now he gets it.

    Howard said he's going to let Erik go now. Erik asked if he can watch from there. Howard said he's seeing Jordan's face and he's freaked out by that. Donnie said he's fine with Erik but he's freaking out some of his band mates.

    Donnie said he met Joe Buck recently and Joe said to him that Erik jerks off to him too. He said he can't go on Full House because Erik jerks off to John Stamos too. Howard said Jordan almost ran out of the room when Erik came in. Jordan didn't know much about Erik and wondered if that voice is real. Howard said it is. Donnie said he asked one of the writers to write a part for Erik and he had him do his low voice and he was able to put that on.

    Howard said that Erik clams he's not gay but only for Donnie. He said he wants to put on a Jenny wig and get it on with him. Howard said he's into some dark stuff. Donnie said he's blushing from this. He said it's all great.

    Howard said that they did that song acoustically and it sounded good. Howard said that he wants to give a shout out to the band too. Joey introduced the guys who were playing for them.

    Howard said he noticed they had a shaker they were using. Howard said Jimmy Iovine was on the show yesterday telling him about using the shaker on the Tom Petty song and it made the song.

    Howard said that he wants to know about the band being no more and if it sent shock waves through their lives. Howard said they had some other hit songs like ''Step by Step.'' Howard asked what happened. Jonathan said that he left the group by his own choice. Joey said he flew the coup when times got tough. Jon said that things were crazy for a while and he was ready to live his life. Howard asked if that was a mistake. Jon said no. He said he knew things were winding down. He said he feels bad for jumping ship. He said he was just ready to go do his own thing. He had some internal struggles that he had to figure out. He said it all worked out and they're all back together. Jon said he was building houses after that. Danny said he had a son and he stayed home and raised him. Howard said they must have made a lot of money from the band. They said they got a fake check for like a billion and they wondered where all the money was really at. Jordan said there were a lot of hands in the pot so all of that money was gone. Donnie said that they may have made 100 million but then they had to split it and take taxes out so when they made 100 million it ended up being maybe 5 million for each guy.

    Howard asked about the merchandise they put out and what the weirdest thing was. They were on marbles and the guys said that was weird. Joey said the fans will bring that stuff to the shows and show it to them. He said they have to be nice about it because they really don't want to see it. Howard said High Pitch Erik puts those marbles up his ass every night. He said he knows that's hard to think about.

    Howard asked Jordan what he was up to when the band broke up. He did some solo stuff. Howard said he went off and tried to do his solo thing. Jordan said it wasn't just a try, it worked. Howard said he knows what Donnie did. He asked what Joey did. Joey said he fucked off and hung out with his friends. He said that it was like arrested development for him. He said that he was going out and partying and goofing off. He said he was super famous but luckily he had 7 older sisters so they didn't let him fall too far. Joey said he grew up in theater and he had a solo album and a top 10 hit. He said in 1999 he and Jordan had top 10 hits. He said he's done some theater and films too.

    Howard said the guys have a new album. He asked if it's more fun now. One of the guys said they were swept from one thing to the next back then. He said they had the higher powers telling them what to do and they just wanted to be themselves. He said it's been amazing.

    Howard asked how the tour works and if they travel together. Donnie said they learned to travel in separate busses. Donnie and one of the guys ride together. Jordan and Jon ride together. They need some separation. Howard said he understands that.

    Howard asked if they stay in the same hotel. They said they usually do stay in the same hotels but they don't stay in them much. They stay in their busses.

    Howard said they're on the road with Paula Abdul and Boys 2 Men. Howard asked if Paula is behaving herself. The guys said she's fine. Howard asked how many songs she does. They said she does about 7. She does sound checks every day according to the guys.

    Howard said it sounds about right to do 7 songs. Howard said Boys 2 Men do their thing too. Howard said they're great guys too.

    Joey said they came back in 2008 after 15 years of being gone. He said they were able to look back in the past and their audience has all grown up. He said they get to play arenas still and that's great.

    Howard asked about having superstar kind of hits and they must have been fucking their brains out. One of the guys said ''Yes.'' Howard said they can almost have anyone they want. The guys said it does mess you up in a lot of ways. Howard said he was happy when he finally got a woman. The guys must have had a lot. The guys said they had to be careful out there because there was so much going on with AIDS and Magic Johnson and all of that.

    Howard said it was pretty crazy. Joey said the mind fuck for him was coming back 25 years later and selling out arenas over and over and over. He said that they have great fans who are dedicated so they get to do it again. Donnie said they self financed it and they've figured it all out so it's working out.

    Howard said when they put out an album do they write their own song ''One More Night.'' Donnie said they didn't write that one but they have written some songs like back in 2008 when they put one out. Howard said the guys did it and beat the odds. Howard asked what the odds are that they get in a band and get to play these tours. Donnie said they're humbled by it every day.

    Howard said everyone is nuts. He said you do whatever you have to do to keep it going. Howard said they have a good thing going. He said they're making money doing something fun at least. Howard said building houses isn't fun. Howard said that's not fun at all. Jon said it is fun and he still does it.

    Howard asked about the New Kids on the Block cruise that they do. They said they've done it for 9 years and it's mayhem. Joey said they're not locked in their rooms or anything. Howard said they also meet the fans at Waffle Houses. They've performed at the Waffle House. They go to eat and the fans will show up by the hundreds. Donnie said they will sing and perform there for fun. Howard said they're out of their minds. Donnie said they love their fans. He said it's game on if they see the fans at the Waffle House.

    Howard you can go to for ticket information. He said they have their songs on 80s on 8 and 90s on 9. Howard said they sounded great and they're doing really well. Howard said they've beaten all of the other bands from back then. Howard thanked them for coming in and played a song from their new album Thankful. They went to break after a minute of the song.


  • New Kids And High Pitch Wrap Up. 06/27/17. 10:05am
    After the break Howard came right back and said it's amazing listening to the guys talking about their career. Howard said he did try as a kid. He said he put a band together. He said he took piano lessons too. Robin said he hated the piano lessons. Robin said they were out there performing on their own. Howard said he wrote a letter to Sixteen magazine and tried to get noticed that way. He said he figured it all out and wrote to them asking them to come to Roosevelt High School to take pictures. He said they had no talent and no songs. Howard said it was all about someone accepting them. Howard said that's what he needed though, a boy band.

    Howard said he was so not talented that his piano teacher committed suicide. Howard said he's not joking about that.

    Howard said he figured he'd let High Pitch Erik come in to watch them perform live. Howard said he forgot and someone threw him a note saying he wanted to come in. Howard said it threw Jordan off. Howard said he was lost in the song. Howard said he felt awful and guilty. He said he let Erik come in and it wasn't the right thing to do. Howard said he came in during the song. Howard said they have video of Jordan when Erik walked in. Howard said he just felt bad because he had promised Erik he'd let him in. He said he wasn't thinking of Erik.

    Howard said Erik actually was singing with them. He had him isolated. Erik was sort of singing along. Howard said they were professional and they stuck with it. Robin said they had to perform in front of a monster.

    Howard said he saw that Wendy the Slow Adult was trying to get on with them too. Howard said he wasn't able to get to her. Howard had her on the phone but she wasn't there. Howard asked if she's there. Wendy was talking to someone else. Howard said that she must be up to no good. Robin said she's not even listening to the phone. Howard said he wasn't going to put her on with the guys.

  • Sexting Discussions With A Caller. 06/27/17. 10:15am
    Howard took a call from a woman who said she wanted to talk about the guy who called in last week about the sexting wife. Howard said that woman is going to continue doing that and his marriage is in big trouble. The caller said that's not right. She had the same situation with someone. She said she started it with this person who was very flirty. She said she felt very feminine after many years of being married. She said it was just playful and after a year nothing had happened. Howard asked if her husband ever found out. She said he did but he won't admit it. she said that she was playing around in her phone and it asked if she wanted her messages going to another device and it turns out they were going to his email. She said he never said a word. The caller said she asked a friend if she should come clean. She said nothing happened but it could look like it did.

    Howard said sexting with someone when you're married can never work out. Howard asked what she was sexting. She said she was kind of like using double entendre type things. She said he was her physician so she did get to see him.

    Howard asked how old she was when she was doing this. She said she's 59 now and she was 58 when she was doing this. She said that she's told she used to look like Cher. Howard asked if she still gets wet. The caller said there's been no reason to. Howard asked if her husband doesn't enter her anymore. She said not really. She said that it's really bad. She said the last time was maybe 5 years ago. She said that she doesn't masturbate either. Howard said he's touching himself right now. He said he just touched the head.

    Howard asked the caller if she used to play with herself. She said at times. Howard asked if she touched her clitoris. She said no but Howard said she must. She said she doesn't need to go that deeply. Howard asked if she pressed on that area. She said yes. Howard kept asking and she kept saying ''Oh my god...'' Howard said we're all sexual animals. Howard said especially Fred.

    Howard asked when she last had an orgasm. She said it's been months. Howard wanted to get her off but she said she's gardening so she can't do it.

    Howard said she's so uptight. He said it's odd that she was the one sexting with her doctor. Howard said she can't calm down. The caller said she's been listening to the show for 30 years now. Howard wanted her to relax and he was trying to help her out. Howard had her take her gardening glove and shove it in her mouth. She said there's a lot of dirt on it. Howard said take the other one and rub it on her ass. She said that's not going to do it. Fred played clips of Ronnie telling her to do things but she wasn't into it. Howard said she's very nervous.

    The caller said she wanted to ask Howard for a favor. She said that her husband doesn't like the show. She said that she wants Howard to just play a song from her son's band. Howard said he can almost guarantee it that the band is no good. The caller said that it's rock and roll so he'd like it. Howard said everyone who sends songs in are bad. Howard told her to send it to him anyway. She said the name of the band is Monkey Bite. Howard told her to send the song after he puts her on hold. Howard said he's not going to listen to anyone else's tapes. Howard said he's doing it for her under protest.

    Howard said she should be having sex or her vagina is going to rust shut. The caller said that's sort of happened. She said that the gynecologist told her that it's starting to close up. Howard said what he wants her to do is get a shoe horn and see if she can't open that thing up. Howard had the caller hold on so he could have Gary to get her information. Howard said he's going to throw everyone else's band right in the garbage. Howard put her on hold after that.

    Robin said she's going to cross her fingers and hope it's the best band Howard's ever heard. Howard said Eddie Van Halen's mom never sent him tapes. Robin said she hopes it works out this time. Howard did a live commercial read after that.

  • Robin's News. 06/27/17. 10:30am
    Howard had Robin start her news after playing her into it with a song parody. Howard said someone knocked out that song after hearing them talking about period panties. Howard said Robin taught him about that recently.

    Robin read a story about people HIV and how people don't want to ask for a test to confirm or find out if you didn't have it. Robin said they have a National HIV testing day now and that's today. Robin had some audio of someone calling on all New Yorkers and people around the country to get tested.

    Howard took a call from a guy who said it just occurred to him that he's been listening since 1982. He said Howard has changed the face of radio in every aspect and beyond. He said Howard doesn't get the credit. He said he was typecast and not treated well. Howard said he was treated like an outcast. The caller said fans have spent so much time listening in the car. He said that he has never called before. Howard thanked him for the call.

    Howard said that he was getting embarrassed during that call but he's right. He said there were people who abandoned him during the FCC years and he's kept a list that he checks before each show. Howard said he puts their faces on marbles and shoves them up his ass every morning. Robin asked how they're being punished. Robin said he's doing that to himself. Howard said he should stop.

    Robin read a story about Kate Beckinsale turning 43. Robin asked how he let that happen. Robin said she looks great. Robin said she has a 21 year old boyfriend. Howard said that's not good. He said that guy is going to make her feel old. Howard said his wife is always his young, spring chicken. He said you go with a young guy you're going to look your age. Robin said this is Howard's psychological problem. Howard said he looks like a monster. He looks 150. Robin said if Kate wants a 21 year old she should have one. Howard said there were pictures of Charlize Theron in the paper and she looks great. He said you know their vaginas aren't closing up.

    Howard took a call from a guy who said he's a doctor and he can talk about the woman's vagina closing up. He said he has to treat that. Howard asked what he has to say. The caller said that when you go through menopause you have things that happen and you can treat that with creams. Howard said why bother if you're not getting fucked. Robin said it can be uncomfortable. Howard said maybe the jaws of life could be used. Howard said he's getting nauseated from all of this women and their dry vaginas talk. He let the caller go. He said people do get older and things happen. He did a live commercial read after that.

    Robin brought up JD and his destination wedding and wondered if he has thought of going outside the country. Howard and Fred did their JD impressions and goofed on him for a short time. Robin said she brought it up because there's certain etiquette that he should be observing. Howard asked if JD has decided on a location yet. JD said they are set on that but that's about it. Howard said he thought they hadn't settled on that yet. JD mumbled something. JD said it should be august of 2018. Howard said JD just celebrated his third year anniversary. He played a song parody about JD after that. Howard said JD and his girlfriend have been living together for a year now. Fred was doing his impression of JD saying ''Good morning pumpkin'' and things like that. Howard asked how things are going. JD said it's all going fine. Howard asked if he's doing sexting or webcam girls. JD said no. He said that she's around a lot more so... Howard asked if the sheets are getting changed. JD said they are.

    Howard asked JD what his favorite sexual position is. Howard said he sees him as a doggy man. JD said that does have a nice view. Robin said it's a nice view for her too. JD said alright. Howard let him off the hook after that.

    Robin said with destination weddings you may have to pay for some people to travel. JD said they're going to pay for their parents to come out.

    Howard said he heard that JD's fiancee is cooking healthy stuff for him but he's not losing with. JD said he doesn't move much. He said he has about a 45 minute walk to work. Robin got back to the etiquette thing and asked if JD is expecting a gift from these people. JD said he's not expecting anything. Howard said he's not going to go to Arizona for his wedding. He said August is his summer too. JD said that's the time he has too. He said her too. Howard said if he has his wedding in his building he'll come. He said JD said he won't invite him. He said he'll get him a gift anyway. He said he's not going on a destination wedding. Howard said he does not want to be bothered. Especially during the summer.

    Howard said weddings are a pain in the ass. He said he waits all year for a couple of weekends in the summer. He said that you have July and August and that's it. He said he's not going to interrupt his weekend for a wedding. He said that's what he'll tell people. He said he just wants to be with his wife. He said just leave him alone. Howard said you finally get a nice weekend and then there's a wedding. He said that's ridiculous. Howard said he's glad JD found a woman. He said he's still in shock over that. Howard said he loves him but he's not going to a wedding in August. Howard said that's the time he wants to be home. Howard said Fred had the best wedding. He didn't even invite him. Howard said Fred is still married to a lovely woman. He said he just spent time talking to her recently.

    Robin read a story about how if you're highly active that your biological age is younger than people who are sedentary or moderately active. Robin read the details of this study and what they say people should be doing. Howard said he doesn't think he's doing intense enough work outs. Howard said he took a good long look at his body last night. He said he got nude and it's so depressing. Howard said Robin wouldn't bang him under any circumstances. Robin said he probably has a very nice body. Howard said his ass is full of something. He said his belly isn't tight. He doesn't even have a 2 pack. He said he has a gunt and he has cellulite in his ass. Howard said it's really depressing. He said he tries to run and all of that but it's not working.

    Howard said even last night he ordered his Eggplant parm and spaghetti. He almost threw out some of the spaghetti but he ate it all. He said he's going to look like shit either way. Robin asked if it could be worse. Howard said it could. Howard said he got Chinese on Sunday night and he even took the sauce on it instead of having it on the side. Howard said it's crazy.

    Howard said he watched ''Logan'' on Sunday. He said he liked it. Robin said she thought it was good. Howard said he doesn't like Logan without his powers. Robin said it was a good movie. Howard said he liked Dr. Strange. He said he watched that on his iPad. He said Ralph got mad at him for doing that. Howard did a live commercial read after that.

    Howard said Benjy wants to come in and tell him he has nice legs. He let him come in. Benjy came in and said he likes Howard's face and hair. He said he thinks he has a great look. He said Howard has real long legs and he has what women love. He said he has the hair and the legs. Howard asked about the face. Benjy said if he got naked and bent over slightly he probably has a great ass. Howard said it's not good. Benjy said he'd like to see it. He said he'll give him his honest opinion. Howard said he's embarrassing him. Howard said he doesn't have a great ass.

    Howard thanked Benjy and took a call from a guy who said he wanted to compliment Benjy. He took the call from the guys in the back who were complimenting his balding head and blotchy skin among other things. Howard said it's better not to talk to Benjy. He said he likes the guy though.

    Robin read a story about Bill Cosby and his speaking tour where he'll talk about sexual assault accusations. Robin said that his spokesperson came on and said that's not what the tour is going to be about. Howard said good idea. Robin said they say that Cosby will have to be back in court again because a woman in California has accused him of doing stuff to her when she was just 15 years old at the Playboy Mansion. Robin said there are still a few cases out there. Howard had a fake commercial for the Bill Cosby restoring his legacy tour.

    Robin read a story about John McEnroe making some comments on NPR about Serena Williams. Robin had some audio of him talking about how she's the best female tennis player in the world. He said if she was a man she'd be like the 700th best in the world. Robin said that she could beat a man higher than 700th in the world. Robin said in John's world you can only be the greatest in the world if you're a man. Howard said he sees what she's saying. Howard said it sounds like he's in big trouble. Howard dropped a piece of melon on the floor so he was searching for that so he was off mic. Robin said Serena asked him to keep her name out of his statements that are not factually based. Howard said he gets that. Robin said she's the best player in the world because she doesn't play men. Howard said he wants to understand. Robin said you judge them by their sport. Howard asked if you're the best at chess you can beat everyone. He asked if she can beat everyone. Robin said on any given day when she's at her best no one can beat her in her sport. Howard said he sees what she's saying. Howard said he's having a hard time with this. Fred had Robin's news theme playing during that. Howard said he's still having a hard time with this. He said the best basketball player is Lebron James. Robin said they don't say that he should be able to beat every woman at everything. Robin said women always have that qualifier.

    Robin read a story about the White House briefings getting attention because they're only audio and not video anymore. Robin said things are getting tense over this. Robin said they called an off camera briefing yesterday and he was being called out about it. Robin had some audio of Jim Acosta asking why not turn them on. Howard asked what that is. He asked why they're not allowing cameras in the press briefing room. Howard said it's weird. Robin had some audio from that and Spicer said some days they'll be on and some they won't. Howard said it's just weird. He was still looking for his fruit piece on the floor. He said it's a piece of pineapple. Gary asked if he wants him to come in with a flashlight. Howard said he can do it after the show.

    Robin had some audio of Chuck Schumer calling the new health care plan ''nonsense.'' Howard was still thinking about the Sean Spicer no camera rule. Howard said he can't figure that out.

    Howard took a call from Sour Shoes who was doing his Mad Dog Russo impression. He wanted to comment on the Serena Williams thing. He told Howard and Robin about women taking on men and how you can't do that. Robin asked why they have to be compared. Sour Mad Dog said that's what you do. Robin was arguing with Sour Shoes like this was a real argument. Howard said he likes that she's arguing with Sour Mad Dog. Howard asked Sour if Spicer should turn the camera on. Sour Mad Dog said he thinks he should. Sour Mad Dog freaked yelling out so Howard let him go.

    Robin read more about the new health care bill and what's going on with that. She had some audio of Chuck Schumer talking about that.

    Robin read a story about how the Supreme Court is going to allow the travel ban that Trump put in place. Robin said the President was declaring a victory but the ACLU is saying that it's not lifted completely so it's still largely intact. Robin had some audio of someone commenting on that.

    Robin had some audio of President Trump talking about North Korea and how we have to deal with that regime quickly. Robin wondered what Kim Jong Un is going to think of that.

    Robin read about how Syria might be getting ready to carry out another chemical attack. Robin said that they appear to be getting ready for that.

    Robin read a story about Trump announcing who he wants in charge of the FBI.

    Robin read a story about how you should not scratch mosquito bites. Robin had audio of someone talking about how that makes it itch even more if you scratch it. Howard said he hates mosquitos. He said he doesn't get why they exist.

    Robin said Alec Baldwin will be back on Saturday Night Live next season. She wrapped up her news and Howard ended the show around 11:20am.

-- Monday --

  • The Rest Of This Week Is Archived.
    To keep the loading time of this page a little shorter I've filed the rest of this week's news in the archives. Click Here to view this week's archive.
    • Scott Impression, Phony Phone Call And More. 06/26/17. 7:00am
    • Remembering Dr. John Sarno. 06/26/17. 7:15am
    • Al Franken Discussions. 06/26/17. 7:25am
    • FOX News The Musical In The Works. 06/26/17. 7:35am
    • Howard's Time With Fred's Wife And Gary's Wife. 06/26/17. 7:40am
    • Howard's Loads, Cosby Trial, Radio Hall Of Fame And More. 06/26/17. 7:55am
    • Dennis Rodman Interview Clips. 06/26/17. 8:10am
    • Phone Calls And More FOX News Musical. 06/26/17. 8:25am
    • Jimmy Iovine Visits. 06/26/17. 8:50am
    • Robin's News. 06/26/17. 10:30am
    • To Be Archived Later This Friggin Week.
    • To Be Archived Later This Friggin Week.
    • To Be Archived Later This Friggin Week.

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