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They started the show with a Christmas version of ''The Great American Nightmare.'' Howard started the show talking about how beautiful that song was. He said that was very nice. He asked if Fred can play the normal Rob Zombie version. He said he's in a real foul mood today. He said he got tons of sleep but he's really on the rag today. He said everything is aggravating him and he's not sure why. He said he's just aggravated.
Howard said he has to get it out or he'll poison the whole show. He said he really is angry and he's not sure why. He said he thinks it has something to do with his vision. He said he got a new prescription and he can't read his screen. He said it's upsetting him. He asked if Robin's changes too. Robin said it does constantly. Howard said he has to get out. He said he's going with Ronnie to Vegas. He said it's enough.
Howard said every once in a while he thinks about doing a new contract there but then he thinks it's enough already. Robin said it's up to him. She said she feels that way too sometimes. She said she does wonder what she's doing. She said she has fun when she's there. Howard said maybe he'll have fun there too today.
Robin said she was thinking about how she was taking care of babies and how they wake up cranky. Howard asked who is a bigger baby than him. He said he even went to bed angry. He said he was watching DC Universe Titans. He said it's really good. He said it's some of the best TV out there. Robin said she can't get into the TV shows where they talk about their TV shows. Robin said she doesn't like Talking Dead and shows like that. She said they have that for the Titans. Howard said he does watch The Talking Dead to find out what happened on the show if he can't figure it out. He said sometimes it's so dark he can't see anything.
Howard said he was reading something this morning and he wasn't able to read it. He said it freaked him out. He said he doesn't like getting older. He said it's freaking him out.
Howard said he was depressed that they ran a clip on Twitter and Instagram of the Stone Temple Pilots and it bummed him out that Scott Weiland is dead.
Howard said tomorrow they'll be playing Hollyweird Squares tomorrow. He said Brent and Katelyn are back in for that. Robin asked if he really wants to deal with a couple that indecisive. Howard said he'll deal with it. He said they'll be there and he understands that Katelyn will be braless. He said that's the big news he got. He said that means Alex Jones is out. Robin said they've changed their minds a few times. Howard said they have and Alex got pushed out. Robin said poor Alex.
Howard said Alex Jones wants to talk to them because he's upset he won't be on tomorrow. Howard had fake Alex live from his studio. Alex said he was going to give him a copy of his book tomorrow if he had been there. He said that his book is number 1 on Roger Stones reading list. Howard said hew's sorry about the screw up. Alex said he has his own Christmas special coming up tomorrow. He had a promo that he played for Howard. He had special appearances by George Soros and Obama coming in for that.
Fake Alex got in some live commercial reads for his products for Infowars.com. He was going nuts with those ads.
Howard said he will have Alex on for another show sometime. He said he's sorry they won't be able to have him on tomorrow. Robin said that's Brent and Katelyn's fault that he got thrown off. Howard said they came to him and said they didn't want to be on with Jackhammer. He said he thinks they thought he'd get rid of Jackhammer but he's not going to do that.
Howard said they will have 2 contestants on the show tomorrow to play. He said Nikki Glaser, Sour Shoes, Ross Mathews, Lenny Dykstra, High Register Sean, Wendy the Slow Adult and the Jackhammer will be on. Howard said Wendy will be the center square.
Howard said it was supposed to make you feel bad. Robin said she thought about Cosby with that. She said he had a cane and a guy walking him in. Howard said Harvey also sent out a picture from a hospital showing he was under medical care. He said he did look lighter. He said he must have lost some weight. He said with the walker it looked like pretty good acting. He said he should have lost control of his bowels there to show how bad things are.
Howard said shitting yourself was how guys got out of going into the draft for the Vietnam war. He said some guys would use peanut butter. He said he would have shit his pants for real. He said he likes how Trump got out of it with the bone spurs thing. He said you have to be rich to have a doctor sign off on that kind of thing.
Howard said his mom told hi he should have just gone to Canada. He said that was without the draft. He said he just wanted him to go.
Howard said he went to see his mom on Thursday. He said she was very negative. He said more negative than usual. He said his dad is still happy though. He said he asked if he was happy and he said ''Yeah.'' He said he reads the paper. He said his mom thinks he has her watching out for him so that's why he's happy. She said she has to stay alive to take care of him. Howard said he's been hearing that since high school.
Howard said he went to see them for like 25 minutes and he was woozy after he was done. He said it was only like 25 minutes. He said he has a wave of unhappiness wash over him with them. He said he has to see Robin to get happy again.
Howard said he was unprepared for his parents. He said you should wake up in the morning knowing what's going to upset you.
Howard said getting back to Harvey Weinstein he's not sure why walkers are made with tennis balls not on them. He said it seems like it might be a multi billion dollar industry. He said they could simulate a tennis ball. He said people could have them built in. Robin said she doesn't understand the tennis balls. Fred said you can't have wheels on them. Howard said he tried to convince his dad to use a walker. He said he won't hear of it.
Howard said his dad is a little shaky when he walks. He said he walks though. He said he can walk but every once in a while he'll hang on to a piece of furniture. He said his knee was bothering him the other day too. He said he sat him down and asked what was going on. He did an impression of his dad talking to him about his knee hurting and getting dizzy. He had his parents going on and on about not being able to hear him and things like that.
Howard said he asked his dad if he would use a walker to get around so he won't fall. He said his mother wants him to use one. He said he tried to talk to his dad about that but he won't use one. Howard said he told him if he falls he's going to end up in a bed in a hospital and he'll be miserable. Howard had his mom lecturing him about what has happened in the past and how miserable he was in the hospital with pneumonia.
Howard said he told his dad to keep the walker there just in case. He said his mother got one and she uses it to get around when she goes shopping. He said his dad won't use it because he has vanity. He said his mother says that he has her to help him out. Howard said he won't be mobile if he falls and breaks a leg or something.
Howard said he asked his dad what his day was like. He said they were going to Dunkin Donuts and Ellen's house. He said he told them to use the walker. He said they won't listen to him. Robin asked what happened after that. Howard said he checked in again and he talked to his mom. He did an impression of that conversation. He said she goes into depression when she hears it's him. He said his father refused to use the walker. He said his mother told him he won't use it. Robin said they have to let him be then. Howard said he told them that he'll fall. He said it'll end up being his headache.
Howard said his dad is so feisty and he's alive and doing well because of that. He refuses to give in to that. Robin said half the time he must be in a chair. Howard said half the time? Robin asked if he can see himself being this way and wanting to stay here. Howard said he doesn't know what she's asking. Robin asked if he would want to stay at home like that. Howard said yes. He said he can see that. He said his mom says she's ready to go. He said she wants to be taken. He said she says she has to stick around to take care of his father.
Howard said his parents look good to him. He said his mom says she doesn't look good. He said his dad likes getting compliments like that. He said he can take it.
Howard played the clip of Lara Spencer talking about his book and how much she enjoyed it. George said some nice things about the book too. Howard said that was better than sex for him. He said he hates making TV appearances and getting free promotion was great. He said he blew out a load. Robin said she had hip replacement surgery. Howard asked if it can make your hip like new. Robin said it can.
Howard said Benjy knew Lara in college. He asked how he knew her. Benjy said he thinks that she graduated earlier than he did. He said they both went to Penn State. Howard asked if she was well known then. Benjy said she was. He said she was very well known because of the diving thing. Howard asked if he hit on her at all. Benjy said no. Howard said he knew girls who were super popular but he knew not to hit on them.
Howard asked Benjy about why he didn't go to some classes when he paid for college. Benjy had mentioned he skipped some classes. He said he did buckle down later in school. He said he was in there for like 6 years. Howard said he's like that Van Wilder character. He said he was in school for like 12 years. He said that was the greatest. Enjoy said Lara really stood out.
Howard asked Benjy what schools he went to because he got kicked out of a few. Benjy said he went to Oxford and Tri County Tech.
Gary came in and showed a picture of Lara from 2 years ago. He said that's how good she looked at 48. Gary said that Benjy must be like 56 if Lara is 50. Benjy said he graduated after her. Howard asked if he ever asked her out. Benjy said no. He said she was the homecoming queen and cheerleader.
Benjy said she had notes and he asked to borrow them. Howard asked why she would lend him her notes in class. He said that his daughter takes great notes and they have people they hire to take notes like that. Benjy said it must be hard to say no if someone asks in class. Howard said he can see why he'd be intimidated by her. He said she's really hot.
Howard asked if he jerked off to her. Benjy said when a girl is really sexy her handwriting is sexy too. Howard said he thinks if you have a crush on a girl everything about her is hot. He thanked him again and let him go.
Howard said Benjy knew her in college and has no stories. Robin said that's what she was hinting at. Howard said she knew there would be no story. Howard said Benjy went to school with her and had zero stories about her. Howard and Fred did their impressions of Benjy talking about her.
Howard said that night the NY Post had pictures of Harvey walking around in a club without a walker. He said he was also shopping in Target. He said if you see him there you think he's getting punished enough. He said it gave him some sympathy. The caller said there must be something that's getting to him when he's fighting for his life. She said its possible that things are going bad for him.
Howard said there was this story about penis fish that washed up on shore in California. He said it's been around forever but this is the first he's ever hearing of it. He said it looks more like a penis than Sal's penis looks like a penis. He said it looks like it smells better than Richard's dick. He said it's called a fat innkeeper worm. He said it's just disgusting. He said it looks like a raw penis.
Howard said he wishes he had rowed in high school or something. He said he could have had abs. Robin said it doesn't work that way. She said you have to have those physical qualities. Howard said he could have developed them. He said now he's angry about it. Robin said he looks for things to get angry about. Howard said he could have had abs and he could have gotten girls at Boston University. Robin said he wouldn't be on radio then. She said he might be transitioning.
Howard asked what Robin did over the weekend. Robin said she saw Simone Dinnerstein again. She said she went there and also saw David Byrne in American Utopia. She said that's just wonderful. Howard said she has such a nightmare life. He said they're so opposites. Robin said Howard said angry today and she's not so she must not be having a bad time. Howard said he likes David. Robin said David Byrne is the rock and roll version of Mr. Rogers. She said he makes such a joyful noise. She said it was so fun to watch. Howard said he had someone water board him because that's more enjoyable.
Howard said he found a series to watch with his wife. He said he found it on Netflix. He said it's called Virgin River. He said he told his wife he was going to watch some Star Wars thing. He said he told his wife he found something to watch and they loved it. He said this his their new show they're going to watch together. He explained the story to Robin quickly. He said they found a bunch of shows they watch together. He said they don't go out to Broadway shows. He said they just watch that stuff. He said he has to take a break so they can get to more stuff.
Howard took a call from Bill Clinton audio book who wanted to talk about how much he likes his book. Howard took the call and the guys had edited together a bunch of things for Bill to talk about Howard's book. Howard went to break after that.
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Howard said he really does love that they work at stations and when they leave they fall apart. Robin said that's what happens when they work at toilet bowls. Howard said it's such an accomplishment. He said they took their shitty product and made it successful. He said every station acted like they didn't need him. He said they were dead last and he made them number 1. Robin said every other show is sold based on getting Howard. Howard said they get full of themselves and forget that. Howard said that's just to remind everyone how great they are.
Howard said Will the Farter was in last week and he gave a 21 Fart salute. He said they have those clips up on Instagram and Twitter. He said he loves the look on Will's face. He said he has this dead eyed look. He said he gets why he has blood coming out of his ass. He said he's so exhausted after he farts. He said he's probably got hemorrhoids. He said he hopes that's all it is. He said he might have some kind of fissure down there. He said these farts are the best he's ever heard. Robin said it seemed to be more effort for him this tie. Howard said it might be the pain from the bleeding.
Howard read some of the feedback they got about his amazing farting. Howard had Fred play some of his farts from last week.
Howard read more feedback and talked about how they have this app to show video. He said he'd like a budget to make a movie about Will the Farter. He said he'd have real actors to play the part of Will. He said he'd like to have a child actor play him as a young man. He said he'd tell the story about having no ass when he was born and things like that. Howard said he'd have Daniel Day Lewis playing the doctor who gives him an asshole. He said Meryl Streep would play his mother. He said it would be fucking awesome. Robin said she's never seen his ass. Howard said they've seen it. He said it does look different. He said his asshole is really different. Robin said they have the unveiling of his ass.
Howard said one fan is worried about his bleeding asshole. He said they were wondering if he's able to have insurance for that ass. Howard said he has to name that Christmas tune game the guys played with him. He said they went back to have him play Christmas songs but it only lasted one song. He said they did get this one song. He said he has it there to play. He played it and Robin recognized it as Jingle Bells. Howard said that's the greatest. He said you actually recognize it. He said it's amazing that he can do that. Robin said everything is amazing about it.
Howard said Will had trouble recording more after that. He said they did it in a bathroom and it didn't work out all that well. Howard played some out takes from the bathroom. Richard was in there with Will when he was recording. Will was unable to play a second song after Jingle Bells. Howard said that's the same bathroom that Robin does her makeup in every morning. Robin thanked him for that. Howard said what went wrong was that Will had a turd in his ass that was stopping his farting abilities. He said Richard wasn't able to take the smell. He said he has another clip where Will gives Richard a taste of his own medicine. Howard played that clip where Will was trying to fart and Richard was dry heaving. Will was blasting away and Richard was gagging.
Howard said the two professionals were trying to work in there. He played more of Will trying to fart and Will was unable to get past that turd. Will said he doesn't think he can do it. He told Richard it's not going to work. Then he blasted out another big fart. Richard asked if he can leave now. Will said if he wants to he can. Howard said this is the strangest work place in America. He said Richard was like a fart doula. He said Richard was apologizing to him for gagging. Robin said that sound that Will makes is so funny. It was Will letting out a grunt. Howard said he thinks the bathroom has been condemned. Robin said it was fine today when she went in there. Howard said he has to thank Will for the great rendition of Jingle Bells. He played it again.
Howard said they're moments away from playing What's in Sal's Pouch. He said he'll play a phony phone call before they do that. Howard said they have Rusty calling an internet spiritual show. He said they must not get a lot of calls because they keep Richard on the line. Howard said this is Rusty calling into this show saying he's being chased by a ghost.
Howard played the call and Richard called in as Rusty Dickens saying he's calling from London and he listens to this show every day. He said he gets visited by ghosts every Christmas and they tell him what a loser he is. He had sound effects playing. The ghosts were telling him that he's wasting his time calling into ridiculous internet radio shows that no one is listening to. They continued to insult the radio show but the host kept Richard on. The host thanked him for calling and then took a call from a ghost who cursed and she hung up on him. Howard went to break after that.
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Howard asked Robin if David Byrne does Talking Head songs. Robin said he does. Howard asked if he did a certain song and Robin said no. Howard said he was going to go until he heard Psycho Killer won't be in it. He said someone did a parody of that song called Psycho Chicken. Robin told Howard some of the songs he did do. Howard asked if he would recognize them. Robin said yes. She said the music is really good. Howard said he'd go see that. Howard asked who did this parody. Fred said it was The Fools. He played the song ''Psycho Chicken.'' Howard let that play for a short time.
Howard asked when that song came out. Fred said it was 1980 and they actually have a video for it. Howard said this is great. He asked if he did this one in concert. Robin said no. Howard said she already said that.
Howard said he has to get down with this What's in Sal's Pouch game. They had a theme song for the game. Howard said it's time to play What's in Sal's Pouch. He said it's the most disgusting game show in history. He said Richard is going to guess what's in Sal's penis pouch.
Howard said they have Christina on the line to play the game. He picked up on her and asked where Sal and Richard are. They came in a second later. Richard had his penis out with Sal's too. Howard said this is the last time of the year they'll see their penises. Richard said he painted Sal's penis himself. Howard asked why his penis is out. Richard said it's just for the fuck of it.
Howard said they have 5 holiday items that Sal will put in his pouch and Richard will feel it from the outside and try to figure out what it is. Sal was putting on a Santa voice for the game. Robin said he's probably trying to disguise his voice. Howard said Sal has some lube for his penis pouch. Sal said you know what happens with a woman when it dries out down there. He said that happens with him a lot. Howard said he has to dip his cock in water and lube. Sal said sometimes it does dry out and he has to use lube sometimes. Richard said he didn't know the penis had a membrane.
Howard asked Sal to explain what he's doing. Sal said he has an extension on his penis that's a lot of skin. Richard said the skin is longer than his dick. Sal said he has like 4 inches of skin he can stretch over things. He said it's pretty elastic so he can tuck it in there and clamp it. He said Richard will feel what's in there. Christina was laughing already.
Howard said they asked listeners to send in their worst holiday stories and Christina sent one in. He said she can win $500 today if she wins the game. Howard said Christina married her husband in 2005 and her story starts there. Howard said her marriage started to fall apart right away. Christina said they started out at her mother in law's house and her husband was drinking whatever he could. She said he was drinking a lot of Corona and champagne. She said they left there and got to her parent's house. She said they didn't know how much he had consumed already. She said they walked in and her mom gave her a big glass of scotch. She said it went downhill from there. Howard said she says that her husband was hitting on everyone there and poked her sister in the crotch with a pool cue. Howard said then he was rubbing her mother's thighs and talking about how great she looked. He said he was hitting on her mother.
Christina said her father was watching all of this and said she doesn't want alcohol in her marriage. Christina said she had never seen him like this before. Howard said he would never get so drunk that he'd fuck around with his mother in law. Christina said that he was telling her how great she looked. Howard said then he threw up and their dog ate the puke.
Robin asked if they're still married. Howard said they are. Howard asked how she stays married to this guy. Christina said he didn't remember anything. Christina said he just passed out after all of that. She said he woke up and he knew something was wrong when he woke up and saw the clothes that were on the side of the bed that weren't his. Howard said it sounds like she's married to Sal. Howard asked if her mother is hot. Christina said she is beautiful. She said they weathered a big storm that night.
Howard asked how long they've been married. Christina said 14 years now. Howard said Sal does stupid stuff like that too. Sal said he went out drinking over the weekend and he took his shirt off and he was dancing shirtless. Howard asked if his wife freaked out. Sal said he passed out at the diner after. He said he woke up the next morning and his wife told him to get away from her. He said he was gyrating and stuff at the bar. He said she was having fun from what he can tell. Howard asked if this sounds like her husband. Christina said that he did a repeat of that night a few years later and embarrassed her in front of co-workers. She said that had to do with Scotch too so he's no longer allowed to drink scotch.
Howard said Sal is in a Santa outfit with his penis painted like a candy cane. Richard said Sal has been pulling on his penis this whole time. Howard said Sal has his penis out and he's going to keep stretching it until they're ready to play. Howard said Richard is naked too showing off his penis for no reason.
Howard said he's going to name the items that could be in there. He said that they'll do them one at a time. He said there's a toy truck, chestnut, ornaments, a Hershey's kiss and many more. Howard said this is the first time Sal put up a fight about not putting a baby Jesus up there. Sal said he thought it was kind of blasphemous to him. Robin said his thoughts are usually wrong. Howard said they were going to slip it in there and fool him. Robin said maybe they can tell Sal all of the stuff he's putting in there is Jesus' stuff.
Richard put on a blindfold and Sal put in the first item. Howard said Richard is going to have to feel his penis. Richard said this is nothing for him. Sal had to guide Richard's hand down there. Richard felt it and said it was little and hard. Howard said he has to identify the item and not the penis. Richard guessed it was a jingle bell. Sal pulled it out and that's what it was. Howard said what a game.
Howard said they just need two more to get this over with. Sal put in another item and then had Richard feel his pouch. Howard had Richard feel his pouch. Richard said that is a big item. Howard said Sal might be getting hard over there. Richard said he doesn't want to push too hard and hurt Sal. He said he feels some edges. He said he's going to guess it's a Dreidel. Sal pulled it out and said it's actually a chestnut. He got that one wrong.
Sal put another item in his penis pouch and then had Richard feel it. Sal had to lube up his penis this time. Richard felt the item and said he thinks it's the Dreidel. He was right this time.
Howard had Sal do his thing again. Sal put another item in his pouch. Sal said this is quite an undertaking this time. It was something big. Richard felt it and had a hard time feeling where the pouch was. He said he thinks it's huge. Howard asked what it could be. Richard said he thinks it's a nut cracker. Sal took it out and showed Richard it was the nutcracker. Richard was shocked. Howard laughed. Richard was cracking up too. Christina won and said she wishes she was there to see it.
Howard said Christina has won $500. He thanked her for calling in and let her go a short time later. Robin said she wasn't sure how Sal was able to put that thing it there. Richard said they have more things to put in there. Sal said the one item that's left is hard. Howard asked if anyone else wants to play. Gary said he's not going to do it. Howard said he figured Jon Hein would want to play. Jon said he will pass on this one. Howard said maybe Shuli or Brent. He said they love air time. No one was coming in.
Howard asked if Ronnie wants to play. Gary said Ronnie spent the whole time looking at the monitor and shaking his head. Richard said Ronnie was in a mood this morning.
Howard told Ronnie to come in and play the game. Gary said no one wants to do it other than Chris Wilding who wants to wear gloves. He said he wants to see Richard and Sal dock cocks together. Howard said they'll save that for their last show. Howard tanked the guys for coming in and wrapped up What's in Sal's Pouch. They went to break a short time later.
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Howard took a call from Jeff the Drunk who said he's just got to tell him a thing. He said he's boycotting tomorrow's show. He said he's been on the last 3 episodes of Hollyweird Squares. Robin asked why Howard doesn't just hang up. Jeff asked what her problem is with him. Robin said he has not performed the last couple of times he was on. Jeff said he wanted to be on this one. He said he should have given him the benefit of the doubt.
Howard said he will give him the benefit of the doubt. He asked who he should bump for him to get on. He said he has Nikki Glaser coming in and she's hot. He said he's not bumping her. Jeff said she is awesome.
Howard said he has Sour Shoes. Jeff said he should be in. Howard said Ross Mathews will be there. Jeff said right there is the guy you get rid of. Howard said they need real celebrities mixed in with Wack Packers. Howard said Ross has a great voice and he's funny. He said there's no way he's taking him out and putting Jeff in. Jeff said how about the Jackhammer. Howard said he's getting to that.
Howard said Mark the Bagger will be in. He said Wendy the Slow Adult is one of the greatest Wack Packers of all time. He said High Register Sean is great. He said he has real content. Jeff said he doesn't get that. He said Sean isn't any good. Howard said they have Lenny Dykstra and Brent and Katelyn too. Jeff said they could change their minds at any moment. Howard said that's true. He said they were against the Jackhammer but he'll be great. Robin said Alex Jones is the first replacement because he got bumped.
Howard asked who he should take out. Jeff said they can take out Jackhammer and Brent and Katelyn. Howard said he's a porn star who fucked Katelyn.
Howard said if he takes someone out Jeff will come in there and fall asleep. Jeff said he was good in there last time he was there. Howard said he has no idea what he's talking about. He said even if all 9 people cancel he's not calling Jeff. Howard said Jeff ruined things for himself. He said he had nothing to do with that.
Robin said they won't be hearing from Jeff tomorrow. Jeff said he wants to turn the fucking radio off when it comes on. Howard said he likes Jeff but they had so many good people that they can't have him there. Robin said he can't be involved with everything. She said name all of the Wack Packers who aren't involved with this.
Jeff asked who has been in it the most. He said no other person has been in it as much as him. Howard asked Shuli if that's true. Shuli said it might be. Shuli asked if Jeff pays for his Sirius account. Jeff said no. Howard said they comp him that account. Gary said he's going to boycott what they give him for free. He said how about they cut him off. Howard said they're not going to dump anyone for Jeff. He said they're happy with what they have. Jeff gave Shuli a big fuck you before Howard let him go.
Shuli said Jeff is still mad at him for interrupting his karaoke performances from years ago. Howard said they put the video of him singing with Carley Simon years ago. He said she looks so gorgeous and she's freaking out being near him. He said he's not sure what he was thinking. He said Jeff was horrible. Shuli said Jeff thinks he can really sing. He said he's delusional.
Shuli told Howard that High Pitch Erik came to see him in Buffalo over the weekend. He said his car is in the shop again and he's claiming that someone sideswiped his car. Howard asked how his insurance company is going to keep him on. Shuli said it's in the shop again getting work done again. Howard said he must be making good money on Cameo to pay for all of this.
Shuli said Erik drove to Buffalo in 4 hours. He said it's like a 6 hour drive. He said Erik said he got pulled over twice and got 2 speeding tickets. He said Erik thinks that he can just throw money at it and it'll go away. Howard said he's going to lose his license to points. Shuli said he was doing 90 for one and over 100 for the second ticket. He said he asked if the PBA cards worked. He said Erik said no and the State Troopers don't care about those. Howard said he wants video of him talking to the cops. Shuli said they should have his car loaded with GoPro cameras.
Shuli said Erik had his badge with him. He said he claims that his lights are in the trunk now and not on the visor. He said he's doing this stuff like it doesn't matter. Howard asked what he's doing and how he's getting away with it all.
Howard took a call from a woman who said there is no way Erik isn't going to lose his license or his insurance will be so high he won't be able to afford it. The caller said she's not sure how they let him go if he was going that fast.
Howard took a call from Sour Shoes who was doing his Jackie the Joke Man voice. Howard said he might be on Hollyweird Square tomorrow. Sour Jackie did his Jackie jokes for Howard for a couple of minutes. He told one joke after another in the Jackie voice. He also did his George Takei voice a little bit.
Howard was cracking up at the Jackie impression. He let Sour go on and on with his Jackie Jokes. Shuli said it sounds like he's making it up as he goes along. Sour kept going with the jokes. Howard said he'll take one more for the road. Sour did one more and laughed like Jackie. He told more jokes even though Howard said he was done. Howard said he'll play Stump the Joke Man with him. He did that and Sour had a good come back for a joke. Howard said there's no way he's replacing him with Jeff the Drunk.
Howard took a call from Mariann from Brooklyn who said she did a book tour plugging his book for him. She said she did the Elvis Duran show. Howard said she called into a couple of shows. Sour said that she was upset that he didn't mention her when he did the book promotion recap last week. Howard said he loves her. They had hung up on her in the middle of that discussion.
Howard said Elvis Duran has like millions of listeners since he's syndicated all over the country. Gary said he's in 80 plus markets. Howard asked if they were ever on 80 stations. Gary said he thinks they were on like 60 something. Howard said they had to claw their way into every market. Shuli said they ended up being number one in every one.
Howard said he was on in Canada for like 3 days and they took him off. He said it was something he said that upset them and the station said he breached the contract so they weren't going to pay him. He said they knew what they were getting when they hired him. He said they told him to sue them. He said it's such a waste of money to sue. He said they became number one in one day. He said they had a ratings gun that they pointed at cars and they knew what station they were listening to. He said the day they were on they were number 1 in the market.
Shuli said the time Howard got taken off the air they had a protest at the station. He said it was Mariann, High Pitch Erik and Beetlejuice who showed up. Howard said no one in Canada protested when he got kicked off. He said he doesn't get it. Shuli said now the fans just bad mouth him. Howard said one out of 4 cars were listening to him when he was on WNBC. He said not one person protested after they fired him. He said they replaced him with Alan Combs.
Howard said he has the worst fans. He said someone says something shitty about Lady Gaga and her fans freak out. He said Billie Eilish had to get body guards because she said something about Lady Gaga. Howard said he said something about Britney Spears and he was attacked. He said his fans are like fuck you. He said his fans blow. He said they just suck. He said his fans were nice enough to come over and pay to hear them. Robin said they won't go out and protest though. Howard said they did pay for them. He said he'll take it back.
Robin said if Howard had a feud with someone they did back him up. Howard said that's true too.
Pam said her autistic guy knows everything about race car driving. Fred played some Ronnie clips for that. Howard asked if she has to touch the guy at all. She said she refuses to wash him because he's always trying to grab her tits. Howard asked if she's cute. She said she's pretty cute. She said she's not Howard's standard. Howard asked how much she weighs. She said she's not up to Howard's standards. She said she's under 200 pounds. Howard asked if she needs to be on My 600 Pound Life. Pam said she wears glasses. Howard said she must be 5'5'' and 200 pounds. She said her face is cute. She said they can look her up on Facebook.
Howard asked if she just sits there watching this crazy dude. The caller said she has to give him his medication and things. She said the schizophrenic won't ever be able to live on his own. She said he did not shut up on her whole 12 hour shift. She said she wanted to put a gun to her head after that.
Howard said he has someone eon the phone who wants to hire her. He took a call from the guys in the back who had Gary the Conqueror clips. They had him telling her to shut up and show her sloppy tits. Howard said he likes how she's interacting with him.
Howard said they need an award show for people like Pam. He said you have to have that. He said they're the people doing the hard work. He said he'd give one to Dr. Agus and so many more. He said they're doing wonderful things. He said how about Pam here who is trying to do great things. He said he she's got a guy trying to grab her.
Fred played some clips of Wendy the Slow Adult answering Howard's questions about Pam. Howard had Pam cracking up on the phone.
Howard said she's 5'5'' and she's 199 pounds. Pam said she's less than 199. Howard asked what she weighs. She said please stop. Howard asked how big her tits are. Pam said Shuli does a great Jeff the Drunk impression. Shuli did the impression and asked ''What's up chubby?'' Howard said that's not nice. He said she really does deserve an award. He said he's very impressed with her. Pam said she appreciates that. She said she wanted to say something about him. She said she discovered Howard on E! and she read his book Private Parts in like 2 days. She said she saw the movie and she thinks that they all did a phenomenal job in that movie.
Howard said he did a weird thing this weekend. He said he heard from Betty Thomas over the weekend. He said he was missing her and missing Ivan Reitman. He said he looked up the Private Parts world premiere on MTV. He said they had a 2 hour show that they did. He said they interviewed him and Robin and a bunch of other people from the movie. He said he was looking at everyone and they all look so young. He said Gary looked like a 14 year old with 30 year old teeth. He said it was a weird experience to watch all of them from so long ago. He said it was like 25 years ago. He said it kind of made him sad. Pam said she was watching the movie and it was like a documentary. She said she really enjoyed the story. Howard said maybe it was the E! coverage of the movie. He said Melissa Rivers was interviewing them. Gary said he remembers that and she was talking to Jeremy Piven and she thought he was Pig Vomit.
Pam told Howard that her cousin is in the band Little Big Town and Howard lost interest. He said he had to hang up on her after she was complimenting Fred. Howard said he should hire her to watch Fred during the show.
Howard said they had a good time making Private Parts. Fred said he sees why people don't give up acting once they start. Shuli said his favorite part of the movie was the guy who did the Israeli impression. He said that guy was so good. Howard said that guy was British. He said he was a really good. He said he can do accents and nailed that. He wondered what happened to that guy. Robin said he hasn't seen him since. Howard said Paul Giamatti blew up after that. He said his agent knew he was going to be big.
Shuli said he remembers seeing the movie out in Vegas and it was packed and people were going nuts. Howard said the movie was weird because it was only popular in the markets they were on in. He said the rest of the country had no idea. He said they did better than Star Wars in some of the theaters where they were known.
Howard said that British guy's name was Henry Goodman. He said he was really good to work with too. He said his impression was just like the real guy. He said that's the guy who told his birth sign was the best birth sign. Shuli did his impression of that guy telling him that Capricorn is the best birth sign.
Howard said Gary got the Melissa Rivers and Jeremy Piven thing wrong. He said it was another person who got it wrong. He said it wasn't Melissa.
Howard said they shot a lot of stuff in Hartford and he was making $250 a week there. He said he had no place to stay so he stayed in a hotel where they had gun shots going off. He said they shot a scene there and it didn't make it to the movie. He said he wishes he could see that footage. He said they had bullets coming through his wall. Robin said they could do another cut of the movie. Howard said he was flying out to California to see the editing. He said he wanted to be a part of that. Robin said they don't mind when you do that. Howard said they said they knew better than him so they didn't need his input.
Robin said Ivan changed the ending of the movie. She said she remembers when they had shot a lot more film and Ivan said this is where the story ends. She said they were editing and working on different things that went on after that big rally. She said he said that's where the movie should end. Howard said Ivan knows what he's doing. He said he was lucky he had Ivan and Betty running the movie.
Howard had Pam back on the phone but he said he hung up on her. She said she thought she lost reception. She said she's been trying to get on the show for like 30 years. Howard said she wore out her welcome. He let her go again after that. He said that was weird. Howard said tomorrow they're doing Hollyweird Squares. He said starting on Monday they're doing the Best of 2019. He said they're also running the best of everything else on Howard 101. He said in January they're doing the 2019 year in review.
Howard said some of the girls aren't that hot who are doing it. JD said some are. He said there's a wide range of people doing it. JD said he doesn't get it personally but he knows it's a thing. He said there's a bunch of Christmas ones out there.
Howard played another clip where Isabel Imagination was doing something Christmas like for her fans. She was whispering and talking about Christmas. Howard said our country is doomed.
Howard took a call from Ralph and told him that he has to go to the dentist so he'll be late. Ralph said he emailed him that. He said he should do an extended cut of Private Parts. Howard said he doesn't need to do that with a 23 year old movie. He said he's not going to keep reissuing Private Parts. He said just see the regular version and you'll be fine.
Howard said he turned down another movie recently. He said it takes up a lot of time to do a movie. He said the character was pretty cool. He said he can't say what it was. He said he doesn't want the person who took the part to know they were the second choice. Howard said he has had some movies come out that he was offered parts in. He said he didn't care though. He said he had a great time living his life instead of making those movies. He said he's sure he'll regret this one. He said he thinks he could have done a good job. Ralph asked what it was that made him turn it down. Howard said it was time and location. Ralph said he'll tell him later. Howard said he won't tell anyone about it. He said he told one of his daughters about it. He said they were talking about turning things down in your life. He said he told her about this and she was shocked he turned it down.
Howard said he was watching this thing where they had three black women talking about wether or not they would have their candidates doing the Howard Stern show. He said it was Joe Biden, Pete Buttigieg and someone else. Howard said they were all talking about that and these women weren't lightweights. He said Elizabeth Warren's person said she wasn't sure about that but you have to be open to all things. Howard said he's not looking to have them on the show but it's nice to hear they're open to it. Robin said they must have heard the Hillary Clinton interview. Howard said these women were very attractive. He said he likes women. He said he wanted to date black women back in high school. He said no one was interested in him though.
Howard said there's more ASMR to play. He said this woman talks to you like you're at a Christmas eve party. Howard said he'll try to get into this. He played the clip and responded to her like he was having a conversation with her.
Howard had another one where GwenGwiz talks to you like she's tucking you into bed on Christmas eve. Howard played that one and said his mom wasn't like that. He said his mom was looking to wash the grit out of his underpants. He said she never tucked him in. He said she'd tell him to go to bed and tuck himself in and close the door. She had heard enough of him that day.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he has some Hanukkah ASMR for him. One of the guys in the back was doing a bit that didn't last more than 5 seconds or so. Howard hung up on him and got back to the ASMR clip.
Howard played more of the clip of the woman whispering to the kid in bed. Howard took a call from Mariann from Brooklyn who was doing Brooklyn ASMR. She was whispering to Howard but he still didn't last long with her.
Howard said DiamondASMR whispers to you when you're checking out at the cash register. Howard played that clip and said maybe they should do a whole show like that. He said he didn't like that one. He said it doesn't make sense to whisper at the cash register.
Howard played a clip of an elf doctor ASMR clip. The woman was talking low and talking about how busy the month is and keeping down to your number of sweets and candies. Howard said he feels like this should be sexual but he'd rather jerk off to porn. Robin said she's not sure why he's playing this stuff. Howard said he's educating people on what it is.
Howard took a call from a woman who was doing shitting ASMR. Someone in the back called in with shitting clips and whispered to Howard what she was doing as the shit sounds were blasting into the toilet. Howard said Fred just came. The caller said she has to open a window. She said she kind of likes it though. Howard said he likes it when a woman shits in front of him like this. The caller said it's coiling up. Howard asked if it's pushing her off the toilet. She said it is pushing her off the seat. Howard asked Robin what she thinks of that. Robin said this is better than the other ASMR. Howard asked if she had corn in her shit. The caller said she did have corn and beans. She said she has to shit again. She had more fart sounds that got really disgusting sounding. Howard went to break after that.
Howard came back and said it's time for Robin's news. Fred played her into it with a song parody.
Robin started her news asking what Howard would do if his dog was being attacked by a bobcat. Howard said he would shoot the bobcat. He said he loves Bobcats too though. Robin said she was watching something two weeks ago about a tiger that was watching elk and it figured out how to get them from dropping down from a tree. She said it learned how to do it from the tree. Robin said they need to eat so that's what they do. Howard said he'd have to save his dog. He said he would do whatever he had to do to save that dog. Robin said he doesn't have a gun though. Robin said this woman jumped on the bobcat and started punching it. Howard said he'd never do it. Robin said the bobcat was very determined and it didn't work. Robin said the dog was yelping and the woman could hear it dying. Robin said the woman is mourning now because the bobcat got the dog. Robin said she gave up when the bobcat turned on her. Robin said the dog's name was Pumba. Howard said he's all for a bobcat in the wild but that's a problem.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he's a door to door vacuum cleaner salesman. Howard asked what he sells. The caller said it's like a $4,000 vacuum. He said it has a lifetime warranty. Howard said he's never heard of a vacuum that costs that much. He asked how many he sells in a week. He said he sells like 2-3 but he sold 13 in one week once. Howard asked what kind of money he can make. The caller said he made $170 one year. He said he does pretty well. Howard asked if he ever got a blow job from anyone. The caller said he had some dates with customers back in the day. He said he'll ask them out after he sells a machine. Howard asked if he had any relationships with them. The caller said that he did with one woman. Howard said he heard that people got turned on to this thing called the internet back in the 80s. The caller said he doesn't do the door knocking thing. He said he does phone appointments.
Howard asked the caller to convince him to set an appointment. The guy mentioned the company but Howard dumped out of that. Howard played the part of the woman taking the call. The guy said they have a $200 grocery package and they just want their opinion on a product they're selling. Howard said he didn't know they were still doing this kind of thing. Robin said she did that back in the day. She said she sold one vacuum. Howard asked the guy more questions and asked how big his cock is. The caller said that it's big enough. He said he actually sells a lot to homosexuals and hoarders. He said they buy everything. Howard said he likes that there's still that kind of salesman going out there. The caller said there's more than you know out there. He said he's driving 6 hours to this place he'll be working. He said they have a carpet cleaning service too that's included.
Howard let the caller go and said he has that sales person kind of attitude. He said he wont take no for an answer. Howard wondered if that vacuum is the one that Bobo stuck his dick in.
Robin read a story about a restaurant that had an employee urinate on the floor of the kitchen yesterday. Robin said a customer started recording video of it while it was going on. Howard said he hates stories like that. He said you hope nothing like that happens. Robin said she was told that back in the slave days the slaves had to start whistling when they picked up the food so you knew they weren't spitting in your food. Howard said he'd spit in the food as much as he could if he was a slave. He did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about vaping and how they say that vapers are more likely to develop lung disease than cigarette smokers are. Robin said they did a study and found that they have a 33 percent higher chance of getting lung diseases. Howard asked who would do it. Fred played a clip of Sal. Howard said Sal is yelling that everything she's saying is a lie. Sal got in JD's microphone and said he's proof positive. He said he used to smoke and he would get sick with bronchitis like twice a year. He said none of those things came back. Howard said maybe his colds were caused by having younger children who would bring colds home. He said vaping may not be related. Sal said he takes everything back then. He said every morning he would spit up a lot of phlegm. Howard said maybe now he's getting better sleep and having a better lifestyle. He said they did a study and found that vaping is worse and he's arguing with it. He said how about just stopping vaping. Sal said he's doing better than he was when he was smoking. Howard said vaping is more dangerous than smoking. Sal said he doesn't necessarily believe it. Howard said they did a study. Sal said he's all for it but he went to a doctor last year and she did the scope down his throat and she said it looks like he hasn't smoked a day in his life. Sal said he thinks the government is tied in with the tobacco companies. He said think about it. He said those 12-15 people who died from vaping no one was caught or jailed over it. Sal said he finds it interesting that people die from vaping but you never hear about what happens. Howard asked what the government is doing. Sal said he feels they are in cahoots with tobacco companies and they're losing to vaping. Sal said he'd be surprised if that wasn't the case. He said he finds it interesting that hundreds of thousands of people die from cigarette smoking but 15-20 people die from vaping and they want to stop it. Robin said the smoking thing is over a long period of time. She said the vaping is over a short period. Howard said the company Juul is owned by Phillip Morris which is a tobacco company. He asked how he explains that. Sal said he doesn't know how to explain that. Fred played a clip of Sal saying ''The authencity gap'' and Howard asked what he was trying to say there. Sal said he has no idea. Howard asked Sal to say statistician. Sal tried to say it but he messed it up until he had Howard say it and repeated after him.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he was listening when Ronnie was talking about moving to Vegas. He said his dad had some big businesses in New York and he married a woman 25 years younger than him and he retired to Vegas. He said he moved out there when he was in his late 60s. He said it seemed like things were great but once they got to Vegas they got a nice house and his dad started to age out. Howard asked if he's trying to warn Ronnie not to move to Vegas and lose his girlfriend. The caller said that's exactly what he was saying. He said when the age spread is that far it's tough. He said the woman left his dad. He said he's all by himself out there in Vegas now. Howard asked if he's like the ghost of Christmas Past. The caller said he is. He said he can imagine this happening to Ronnie. He said he's still spry now but some day he won't be. He said he went to visit once and his dad told him that she was taking care of him but then he wasn't able to get around. Howard said he was very active and then he moved and sat and stared at the wall. He said he was feeling useless. The caller said exactly. He said they had a nice home and had a pool and a hot tub. He said he never gets out there now.
Howard said Ronnie is in a bad mood today so he must be avoiding coming in. He let the caller go. Ronnie came in and said he head the whole thing. He said he feels sorry for the guy. Howard asked if he sees any similarities. Ronnie said he gets it. He said if she goes she goes. Fred brought out the Ronnie Puppet and did his thing. Howard said he heard Ronnie is in a bad mood today. He said he heard he wasn't so thrilled about the Christmas party. Ronnie said they should shut the fuck up. Howard said something must have happened. Ronnie said nothing happened. He said that guy's story could have been bullshit. He said people like to pile on there. He said his father had the same thing. He said he has told that story on the air. Robin said she's not sure what that story is. Ronnie said it's the same thing that happened with this guy. He said his father had a young girlfriend and she moved to Florida. He said he had a heart attack and she split town. Howard said he'd hate for that to happen. Ronnie said that's the chance you take. He said his father found another woman and then they both died within a month of each other. He said it as like 4-5 years age difference.
Ronnie said that he got a walker. He said Richie Wilson sent him one. Howard said that's brilliant. He said he wishes he had thought of that. Ronnie said he was going to take it to a hospital supply place and sell it. Howard said he should bring it to the Christmas party. Howard asked if the girlfriend his dad had was as young as Stephanie. Ronnie said they were like 18 years apart like Howard and Beth are. Howard said that's un-fucking-believable. Howard let him go and played him out with a song parody. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about a newspaper up in Alaska whose owner is willing to give away the paper just to make sure it survives. Robin said there's a lot to running this paper though. Robin said they have to be the publisher and the subscription taker too.
Robin read a story about people suffering from dry skin making a big mistake getting out of the shower every day and roughing yourself up with a towel. Robin said you should pat yourself dry. Robin said the rubbing is too rough on your skin. Howard said he hates this winter weather. He said his back was itchy the other day. Robin said you should pat yourself dry and slather yourself with moisturizer. Howard said his wife does that and she always smells so good. He said she'll shower 3-4 times a day and she's never got dry skin. He said she puts lotion on. Robin said that's a lot of showers. She said it might be too many. Howard said he's just going to pound his head against the wall to get the water off his face. Howard said Benjy uses a belt sander on his face.
Robin said Kate McKinnon did a spot on impression of Greta Thunberg on Saturday Night Live this weekend. Robin had some audio of the bit she did on Saturday Night Live. Robin said that accent she pulled off was great. She said it was wonderful. Howard said she's carrying on like she wants to have sex with her. Howard said Kate did a great impression there.
Robin read a story about a reporter who was groped at a 10k race event. Howard said he doesn't like the K in 10k. He said just call it a 3.5 mile race instead. Robin said this reporter was standing there and this guy ran up behind her and palmed her ass. Robin had some audio of the reporter talking and getting thrown off when the guy touched her. Robin said when she paused like that it's when the guy got her. Robin said they found out the guy was a youth minister. She said he claims he was just trying to be funny. Robin said the reporter went on and talked about how her power was taken away at that moment. She eventually pressed charges and the guy faces a year in jail now.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he's sorry about the last call he made to them. He said he took this woman to church and she's like Robin with the big top. He said she has it all. He said everything was going good. His phone was sounding awful so Howard and Robin were talking over him. Howard asked if he's a white guy putting on a white affect. The guy said he's not. He said he was with this woman and she tried to fuck him with a 16 inch dildo. Howard cut the guy off and said that seems like a long conversation. He said it sounds like she tried to do what Stephanie does to Ronnie. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about Vanna White hosting Wheel of Fortune when Pat Sajak was out. Robin said the episodes have just started airing. She had some audio of Vanna talking about why she's hosting. They had Minnie Mouse filling in for her job turning the letters. Howard let the clip play longer to hear how she was interacting with the contestants. Howard said he feels like Pat's job is safe. He said it doesn't sound like she's all that familiar with the game even though she's been there for 30 years. He played more audio of Vanna hosting. Robin said Pat is on his way back now.
Howard said years ago he had a chance to go on Wheel of Fortune and he got to hold up his book at the end of the show. He said he got there and Vanna White stood with him and Pat ran out of the room. He said Vanna was very nice.
Robin read a story about the Hallmark channel pulling a commercial because it had a same sex couple kissing in it. Robin said it was two women tying the knot in the commercial and Hallmark pulled it. Howard said it was some religious assholes who complained so they pulled the ads. Robin said then the owner of Hallmark said they take that back and did air the ads. Robin said they say they are all inclusive and they're not looking to ostracize people. Howard said he likes what Hallmark does with animal rescue. Robin said they have a Hallmark channel there on Sirius. Howard said he doesn't listen to that but he does listen to other channels there. Robin said she was listening to Sirius this weekend and heard the Casey Kasem countdown. She said it was eerie hearing that. She said she was thinking about his body being moved around the world after he died. Howard said he loves that they use that countdown. Robin said he's dead but he sounded good. Howard said he loves what Sirius is doing. He said he used to have his own playlist but now he just lets them pick it for him. Robin said she went to the Tom Petty channel and she heard Tom talking. Howard said he used to do a whole show for XM for a while. He said it was pretty good. He said he likes Tom Morello. He said he does a good job. Robin told Howard about some of what she heard Tom Petty talking about on his channel.
Howard took a call from Ralph who said that Vanna was a train wreck on Wheel of Fortune. He said she was forgetting stuff and Minnie Mouse did a better job than she does at turning the letters. Howard said poor Vanna has Ralph goofing on her.
Robin read a story about an investigation into Bill de Blasio who was trying to run for President. Robin said they say the city is looking into his expenses for the NYPD detail he had with him. Robin said they show that his campaign spent nearly $1.4 million but none of that went to the city for reimbursement.
Robin read a story about the homeless people in New York and how they disappeared years ago. Robin said they apparently put them in Newark and they're not too happy about that in Newark. Robin said the city has been sending them there for quite some time without their knowledge. Robin said now Newark is telling them to stop. Howard said Newark sounds a lot like New York so that's a good idea.
Robin read a story about the impeachment hearings and a poll shows that most people think their rights are under attack. Robin said they say 92 percent of people are worried that their constitutional rights are at risk with this current administration. Robin said even FOX has a poll saying that 50 percent of Americans want him impeached.
Howard read some email about Will the farter's appearance last week. He read about Gary wearing that gas mask during the segment. Howard said Will was huge on the show. He read some feedback about that too. Howard said he made Gary wear that gas mask at the morning meeting too.
Robin read a story about Eli Manning getting a standing ovation from the fans. She said it may have been his last game as a Giant. Robin had some audio of Eli talking about their win.
Robin read a story about Garret Cole getting signed to the Yankees for $324 million. She wrapped up her news and Howard ended the show around 11:20am.
They started the show with a Christmas version of ''The Great American Nightmare.'' Howard started the show talking about how it's the start of an exciting show. He said it's the holiday season.
Howard said they have to pack in a lot of stuff today. He said they have Hollyweird Squares coming up today. He said they have the squares lining up now. He said they have a lot of guests for that. He said they have Nikki Glaser, Jackhammer, Ross Mathews, Lenny Dykstra, Wendy the Slow Adult, Sour Shoes, Mark the Bagger, High Register Sean, Brent and Katelyn. He said no one will be going near Nikki. He said he was watching her on YouTube the other day. He said they had the best roasts of Nikki Glaser. He said they went one after another and they were so funny. He said she had some stand up special where she was in a mini skirt and it was distracting. He said he didn't hear any of her jokes. He said he thought she looked great. He said he gets why you have to dress down for stand up. Robin said for Howard for sure.
Howard said he was going to see how good Robin is at this. He said people go crazy over Christmas gifts. He said he has one for Robin. He said he'll hand it to her in the break. He said people go crazy over gifts. He said he has a clip of someone either getting a gift or giving birth and Robin has to guess which it is. Robin said she likes this.
Howard played a clip of someone letting out some weird yells. Howard asked if she's getting stabbed. He said that's what it sounds like. Robin said it's only gift or giving birth. Howard said that's right. Robin said she has been in a labor delivery and she thought this would be easy. Howard said she must be getting quite gift. Robin said she's going with gift. Howard said she's right. He said she's getting new pajamas. Robin said people don't yell like that for pajamas. Howard played the full clip.
Howard said this is another clip. He had one of a woman screaming very high pitched and saying ''oh shit!'' Howard played it again for Robin. Robin said she's saying that's giving birth. Howard said she's wrong. He said she's getting a gift of a puppy. Howard said he thought she was giving birth to a horse. Robin said she did sound like a horse.
Howard played another clip where the woman was screaming ''Nooo!'' Robin said she's saying giving birth. Howard said she is correct. Howard played the full clip and the woman was screaming a lot as it went on.
Howard played another clip where a woman was screaming over and over. He had to play it twice for Robin. Robin said she's going to say that's an exorcism. Howard said that would be Beth if he gave her a Dutch oven. Robin said she's going to say that's getting a gift. Howard said she's right. He played the full clip and the woman was getting a new car.
Howard said Robin has won. He said she got 3 right. Howard said he has one last one to play. He said she only got one wrong. Howard played another clip where a woman was screaming and a guy says something unintelligible. Howard said Robin has almost a perfect record. He played it one more time for her. Robin said she's going to say giving birth. Howard said she is right again. He said she gave birth. He played the full clip.
Howard said what a game. He said he loves being a game show host. He wrapped up the game and played a theme song they had for the game.
Howard said Robin was in the air force and was a nurse. He said she knows some of those noises. Robin said she did see some births. She said they walked into a room one day and she heard a woman roaring. She said she asked her teacher ''What do you keep back here?'' She said that wasn't very appropriate. Howard said he knows she also climbed on top of a patient like she was going to fuck him. Robin said she just wanted to shock the guy.
The caller said maybe get Scorsese and De Niro in there. Howard said they both need a rest. He let the caller go. He said he thought that The Irishman was great. He said he likes Netflix a lot lately. Robin said she saw a movie she liked and she's not sure of the title. She said it had Moon in the title.
Howard said he just finished Titans on DC Universe. He said he likes Amazon Prime too. He said he enjoyed The Irishman a lot. He said the one criticism is the special effect of making them look younger. He said it was really amazing what they did with that movie. Robin said she wishes they would stop doing that. She said the movie she saw was The Shadow of the Moon. She said it was really good. She said it was a Sci-Fi kind of thing.
Howard took a call from a guy who said if you get 3 moving violations in Massachusetts you lose your license. He said it's not good what's going on with High Pitch Erik. Howard said he was talking to Ronnie about that. He said Erik was doing 101 miles per hour in a 65 zone. He said he's going to get so many points he's going to lose his license. He said he got one for 90 and one for 101. He said he got pulled over and got a ticket after showing PBA cards. He said he didn't slow down after that. He said he sped up and went from 90 to 101.
Howard said Ronnie thinks Erik will keep driving even if he loses his license. Robin said he's not losing anything. Howard said they can't put that genie back in the bottle once it's been released.
Howard said he can't believe he passed his driving test. He said he can't believe he can parallel park his car. He asked why they're not filming this. He said maybe he's an idiot savant. He said he can't understand it either. Robin said they have to give him the points in court.
Howard said he loves that. Robin said she has the feeling these Santas have to take every job. Howard said they find these guys online and he's sure they don't get any calls. He said it's an easy living to make and there are a lot of them around. He said this guy has to be nice to anyone who calls. He said it's nice to see the President hasn't lost his sense of humor even when he's facing impeachment.
Howard took a call from fake Donald who was talking about how he learned about Christmas when he read the bible. Howard asked some questions about what happens in the White House at this time of year. He asked if he's pissed off about being impeached. Trump said he has the best impeachment in history. He said he hates the articles of impeachment. He said he hates all articles. He said he skipped them all in Playboy when he was reading those.
Trump said he's playing fetch with Lindsay Graham. He said threw a stick for him and Lindsay came back barking. He said he has a red lipstick down below now.
Howard asked Trump about the toilet flushing thing he talked about recently. Trump said he's calling for a ban on all flushing until they figure out what's going on. He said there will be big piles of shit everywhere. Howard said he zoned out on that. Howard let Trump go a short time later. Trump said happy whatever holiday Robin celebrates. He said maybe she should go wherever it is that they celebrate that. Robin said she is from there. Howard said Robin is an American. Trump said that's fake news. Robin said she was in the military. She asked what he has done for the country. Trump just said no. He said he has to go. Howard let him go and said Robin really tripped him up with the military thing.
Howard said he has to take a break. He said later on they'll do Hollyweird Squares. Robin asked if they would come after him if he did Hollywood squares. Howard said no, they don't care. He went to break after that.
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Howard came back and said that's Elle King singing that Tom Petty song. He said he probably heard it somewhere and put it in his playlist.
Howard said he woke up early this morning having anxiety. He said it was about taking LSD in college. He said it made him swear off all drugs. He said he could have fucked up his whole life with that decision. He said he realized how depressed he must have been that day to take the LSD. He said he had anxiety over that. He said it was tremendous anxiety. He said he was sitting there freaking out about it. He said he could have fucked up his life. Robin said he didn't though. She said that it's one thing to dream something but it's another to be awake and still have it.
Howard said in college he felt out of it. He said he went off to college and didn't know how to connect to people. He said he was just out of it without any friends. He said he only had Dr. Lou. He said he didn't really have any other friends. Robin said she remembers meeting some. Howard said he didn't go to college with the guy she's thinking of. She said there were three guys. Howard said he did radio with some guys but they weren't friendly. He said they just did the show together. He said he just felt awkward in college.
Howard asked if it's not normal to have anxiety about his past. Robin said it didn't happen so it's odd. Howard said the day before he took LSD he was studying with a girl who was rather attractive. He said she was in his room. He said it was the night before he did the acid. He said they started making out and he thought it was great. He said she was very attractive. He said he forgot about this to a degree. Howard said they made out but didn't close the deal. He said they didn't bang. He said the next day they were going to study again. He said he thought that might mean banging. He said maybe third base. He said he went over to her dorm room and she lived far away. He said he went down there and she was sitting there with a guy from his class. He said he sat there on her side of the room. He said it was like she had the guy there to make sure he wasn't going to make out with her again. He said she could have just said she was sick or something. He said she wasn't that into him apparently. He said he thought she was since they made out.
Howard said they brought out hash and marijuana and that made him paranoid. He said he sat there waiting for the dude to leave but he wasn't putting together that she made sure he stayed there. He asked why someone would do that and not just tell you it was a mistake the night before. Robin said girls are strange.
Howard said he remembers putting in endless hours waiting for this guy to leave. He said he finally realized what was going on. He said he was wasted though. He said he knew it wasn't going down. He said he put in a whole day trying to get this girl. He said he smoked hash and marijuana all day.
Howard said he realized this girl must have had a change of mind about him and this guy's job was to keep him from coming on to her. He said she was hot but not that hot. Robin said he's not a monster so she could have just said something. Howard said he's a reasonable guy so he wouldn't have done anything. He said he had this anxiety about this guy that day. He said after that day he had rejection and smoking hash and weed. He said that night he took four hits of LSD. He said he must have been so freaked out and depressed that he took four hits of acid. He said he didn't know that it was 4 hits. He asked who takes acid at 9 at night? He said he wasn't able to close his eyes. He said he was already wasted from hash and pot. He said he must have been out of touch that he was upset about that girl and that guy. He said it was like the guy was a prison guard.
Howard said he was so out of touch back then he didn't know that he was depressed. He said maybe if he had turned to his roommate and told him what happened maybe he could have talked about it. He said he didn't know what to do. He said he just took acid.
Howard said he hadn't thought about that incident in like 35 years or so. He said the only thing he's upset about is that he should have left the room as soon as he saw that dude there. He said he didn't know what was going on. He said he could have been there to beat him up for all he knew. Robin said it sounded like he had a great day the day before. Howard said he did. He said he had the worst day of his life the next day because he wasn't able to come down from the LSD.
Robin asked what brought that up. Howard said he was laying in bed thinking about it. He said he had tremendous anxiety about it. He said it was weird. He said he doesn't think he even saw those people again after that. He said he's glad he survived that acid trip. He said he tells kids not to do drugs. He said it's a waste of time.
Howard said out in California everyone seemed to be taking drugs. He said even JD is a total pot head now. He said he was visited by the ghost of acid past last night and it wasn't pleasant. Robin asked if it was like a flashback. Howard said it could have been. He said he still remembers what he saw when he was hallucinating. He said they seemed so real. He said it's playing tricks on your mind and he may not have ever gotten over it fully. Howard said he powers through life so that's how he got past that.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked if the woman who left him hanging is listening now and doesn't have the nerve to call and let him know what happened. Howard said he thinks about that too. He said he thinks about women who rejected him. The caller said one of them has to be a fan. Howard said he thought that he'd hear from every one of them once he got famous. He said he used to have Gary call them up trying to get them on the show and they never wanted to come on. Howard said he would love for that woman to tell him that she should have hung out with him. He said she must have thought he was such a loser he wasn't worth hanging out with.
Howard said he was in love when he was like 18 and this girl was in her 20s. He said he was in love with this girl and he would go from Boston to New Jersey to visit her. He said they would fuck like rabbits. He said they were fucking like 5 times a day. He said he was consumed with her. He said she was the greatest girl on the planet. He said she rocked his universe. He said one day she calls and tells him not to visit her because she found a guy with a bigger dick than his.
Robin asked why he's stay on the phone that long to hear about the big dick. Howard said she eased into it. He said he knows that his penis works fine. He said he probably didn't fuck her good enough. He said she didn't just tell him he sucked. The caller said they have to tell you all about it to make you feel really bad. Howard said she could have done it differently and told him it just wasn't working out. He said she didn't have to tell him about the guy with red hair and a big cock.
Howard said he's the nicest guy on the planet. He said if a woman had second thoughts about him fucking her he'd pull out and leave. Howard said just a hint and he's gone.
The caller said he's only had 3 girlfriend in his life but that's because he has to have the woman work for him. He said that she has to be the right one. He said now he's married to his ex-wife's best friend from high school. Howard said he believes it. He let the guy go a short time later.
Howard said he's still looking for the women he dated. He said he needs them to say that they were wrong and they should have been with him. Robin said that something that was so important to him wasn't that important to that person. Howard said some of these women don't even remember him. He said they say they didn't know him back then. He said they deny every knowing him.
Howard said the only person who remembers him from college is Bill O'Reilly and he never met him there. He said Bill keeps going on saying that they hung out but they never did. Howard said he doesn't know Bill from college. He said he didn't know him before he saw him on Inside Edition or whatever. Howard said he would have been happy to have any friends. He said he didn't know Bill. He said Bill's a weird guy. He said he should really get to Hollyweird Squares. Robin said Harvey Weinstein gave an interview to the Post and said he's not faking it with the walker. Howard said he's also claiming that he's good for women. Howard said he should just shut the fuck up. He said with what he's up to out there he's not good for women.
Howard said sour Shoes won't be making it in today. He said he crashed his car and can't make it in. He said everyone else made it in. He said they're going to put it all together. Robin said she wasn't sure if Sour was going to make it today. Howard said this is like the 50th time he's burned them.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he's looking forward to the game. Howard said Alex Jones will be in today instead of Sour. The caller asked if he ever thought that the dorm room girl and the other guy wanted a three way. Howard said not one person wanted him back then so two people wouldn't want him. He said it never occurred to him. He said he can't imagine that. Robin said in college people just propose things. Howard said maybe they did both want to fuck him. He said it's possible. He said he never considered that. He didn't think that two people would want him. The caller said maybe he can round up these people and get them on the show. Howard let that guy go and went to break a short time later.
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Howard came back and said this is an unreal day. He said they'll meet their contestants in a moment. He said they have the Hollyweird Squares starting and they'll have two contestants competing for big bucks. He said every time they win a round they get $2,000. Howard said that's a lot of money.
Howard said they have Myk up first. Howard asked who named him, Wendy the Slow Adult? Howard said he'll be playing against Josette. He said hello to her and then Nikki Glaser, fake Alex Jones and Ross Mathews. Ross asked what the fuck he's doing there. He asked why Jeff the Drunk isn't there. Howard said Ross is fabulous. He said he's a hero of theirs and he comes on the show whenever they need him.
Howard said under Nikki is Mark the Bagger. He said hi to him and then Wendy the Slow Adult. He said High Register Sean is next to Wendy. Sean said that he's so glad Alex is there instead of Jeff the Drunk.
Howard said down on the bottom is Lenny Dykstra. He said hi to him and Lenny said hello to Robin. Howard said he has so much to talk about with Lenny. He said hi to Brent and Katelyn before that. Howard said Lenny has never swung before. Lenny said he can't do that. He said he's way too normal. Howard said next to Brent and Katelyn is the Jackhammer. He asked if it's weird for him to be there with Brent and Katelyn there. Jackhammer said not at all. Katelyn said it's not weird for her either. Howard said Brent has on his metal look today. He said he's dressed for this game. Brent had a shirt and some chains on. Howard said this is Metal Brent.
Howard said they have to get to know their contestants. He said they're going to find out about Myk first. He asked where he lives. Myk said he lives in Dallas. He said he's from California originally. Howard said his dad was a heroin addict and left him as a baby. Myk said he did. He said his mother was a problem though. Howard asked how bad she was. Myk said she's an alcoholic and she had him when she was 16. Howard said when he was a child he was told to go to the liquor store to get some salt. Myk said that it was on Thanksgiving and they went there and got some candy and salt and they came back and his aunt and uncle were over and the door was locked. He said his mother's bedroom window was steamy so they looked in and saw his mom having sex with his uncle, who was not her brother, and her step dad was having sex with his aunt. Howard said what a thanksgiving. Howard asked if he confronted them. Myk said later on they saw them eating and your eyes are focused on things. He said that it was gross seeing them in the bedroom.
Howard said two years later on New Year's eve they had another incident. Wendy was coughing and interrupting. Howard said these people have hard lives and Wendy is coughing through it. Howard said this man is telling a horrible story about his childhood. Wendy said she's been trying to get rid of the cough and she has a cough drop in her mouth. Alex Jones had some products to sell her. Howard thanked him for that.
Howard asked Myk about this other story and what happened. Myk said his mom had guys over all the time and he and his sister were watching TV and his mom and the boyfriend had sex in her room. He said they could hear it. He said his mom was really good looking and she knew it so that was dangerous. He said they heard pounding on the door and they open it and it's grandma. He said it's his mom's mom. He said mom's boyfriend was grandma's boyfriend. Myk said his grandmother had his mother at 16 too so she's not that old. Howard asked what she did. Myk said she walked in and asked where the fuck his mom is. He said she had a gun with her. He said she went into the back room and they heard yelling and screaming and then gun shots going off. He said his grandmother shot the guy in the arm. He said they were taken away to foster care after that. Howard said maybe they shouldn't celebrate the holidays. Myk said he hasn't spoken to his mother in 6 years now. Howard said he has an IQ of 144 too. He said very good.
Howard said Josette is playing against Myk. He asked Josette where she's from. She said she's from the Jersey Shore. Howard asked about the hurricane that destroyed her house. She said that she had to live in her garage for 2 years while they rebuilt. Howard asked what her horror story is. Josette said she was babysitting her dad and he was on a new drug. She said he had some shit on his foot and then she noticed he had diarrhea down his leg that leaked out of his adult diaper. Howard asked if that sounds familiar to Wendy. Wendy said yes.
Howard asked what happened. Josette said her mom had these Christmas decorations in the living room. She said she got her dad's diaper off and she started to clean him up and then he projectile vomited into her face. Josette said she threw up and her dad threw up because she threw up. Josette said he threw up on her head. She said then he fell back and got tangled in the Christmas tree. She said she had to wait for him to fall asleep and then clean it all up.
Howard said they have two fabulous contestants there. He said that Sean looked like he was going to throw up. Sean said that Myk's story made him wonder why he was trying to save humanity in the first place. Howard asked who knew he was trying to save humanity.
Howard said they have to say hello to the celebrities again. He said they all know Nikki Glaser. He said that she's one of the biggest celebrities in Hollywood. Nikki said that Josette's story made her want to hear more of Myk's story. She said the worst thing that his mother did was spell his name Myk. Howard said Nikki's career is going well and last time she was there she told a story about getting ghosted by Bobby Bones. Howard said Bobby is calling bullshit on that story. Nikki said he says that it wasn't because she was kicked off the show. She said that he did ghost her but it was after all of that. She said he did talk to her and then he ghosted her again.
Howard said he heard that Nikki's mom is furious about her talking about blowing Bobby Bones. He asked if her mother called her about that. Nikki said that she went home and her mom was unable to listen to the show because of that story. Nikki said she can't lie to Howard. She said that her mom isn't comfortable with things she talks about.
Howard asked Lenny about that story. Lenny said he's glad that he brought her up. He said he's kind of targeting her. He said that a dog's gotta eat so he's putting Robin behind her. Howard said Nikki has to be complimented by that. Howard said Lenny is one of the greatest baseball players of all time. He said she could brag about it if he went down on her. Nikki said as long as she was getting something. Lenny said he's like Picasso. He said he has to have a clean canvass and then they can build this beautiful painting. Howard said Lenny is saying that he's like Picasso. Lenny asked her to open her legs for him.
Howard moved on to Mark the Bagger and asked if he jerked off last night or today. Mark said no to all of that. Howard said it's an honor to have Nikki there today. He said she promised not to have more cosmetic surgery. Nikki said she got Botox and some stuff in her lips. She said she gets this thing done to her butt too. She said it's electric shocks to her ass. Lenny said her rack is real. He said he does his research so he knows. Howard said her rack is real so he's right there.
Howard said (fake) Alex Jones is there too. He spoke to Alex a little bit. Alex was going on and on about the Illuminati and things like that. He said he just needs 20 minutes to talk about all of this. He was going on and on. Howard said High Register Sean must like Alex. Sean said he does agree with some of the stuff he has to say. He said he agrees that Jeffrey Epstein didn't kill himself. He said he believes there are Dog Men too. He said he has seen their eyes and tracks in his yard.
Howard moved on to Ross who said he's very happy to be there. He said that Alex just sold him some pills that will cure his gay. Howard said he doesn't want to stop being gay. Ross said he can feel Jackhammer's cock from where he's sitting. Howard asked how big his cock is. Jackhammer said he's about 7 inches. Howard asked what's going on in his life. Ross said he broke up with Salvador about 18 months ago. He said he's single now. Howard asked if he wants to find another man. Ross said he got on the apps to find someone. He said he got on Grindr and got kicked off. He said they thought he was impersonating Ross Mathews. He said he's no longer on there. Howard asked if he has men contacting him. Ross said not so much. Ross said he loves Wendy and he can't believe he's so close to her.
Howard moved on to Mark the Bagger and asked what he's up to. Mark said he's been doing a lot of Cameo videos. He charges $45. Howard asked if Lenny does that too. Lenny said he does and he gets $95. Mark said he's saving up for a trip to Las Vegas. Howard said Wendy is coughing again. He let her get that out. He said that doesn't sound good. He said they found out that Wendy's vagina was bleeding on her way up there. He said she drove up there. He said she just got out of a rehab facility after a car accident. Wendy said she was in there for 28... weeks. Howard said they did everything for her in there. Wendy said they're waiting for her to find out if she can stand up and walk. Howard asked if she's able to go to the toilet. Wendy said she can but her mom has to help her wipe. Nikki said it's a good thing Josette is there today.
Robin asked if that was her period that she got. Wendy said it was. Howard said that's an aphrodisiac to Lenny. Lenny was talking about Nikki again and saying if she was just with him one night she wouldn't be able to walk. He said that she'd never want him to stoop fucking her. Nikki said she hopes he has a handful of roofies because that's the only way she's going to get through that.
Lenny told Nikki to ask Robin about it. Nikki asked what kind of therapy she'd need after something like that.
Howard asked Lenny if he has gone down on a woman when she has her period. Lenny said he just learned that a woman has 3 holes. He said he's way different that way. Howard said Mark is a big Lenny fan. He said he's a huge Phillies fan. He said he thinks that Lenny could have helped the Phillies win. Howard asked if he wants to talk to Lenny. Mark said that's okay. He mentioned some play that he screwed up. Lenny laughed.
Howard asked how many hours it took Wendy to get there. Wendy said it was only like 6 hours from Richmond where they stopped. Howard asked if she had a lot of fast food on the way up. Wendy said her mom is cutting her off so she didn't have a lot. Howard asked how many times she defecated on her way up. Wendy said 3 times. She said her mom stopped and cleaned her up when she shit in her diaper. Howard asked how many days her period lasted. Wendy said it's lasted since she got home maybe 3 weeks ago. Robin said wait a minute there. Sean said she might be patient zero for an Ebola outbreak. Howard asked if that's what's coming out of her today. Wendy said it is. She said her mom put two diapers on her today.
Howard said he has to move on to High Register Sean. Sean asked him to call him just Seany. Howard said he's going to call him High Resister Just Seany. He said Sean has had a speech impediment for a long time. He said he has a high quality to his voice and a stammer. He said Sean believes that Ebola is a way to depopulate Africa. He asked what's going on there. Sean said that Africa is rich in diamonds... He took so long to get that out that Alex Jones interrupted and said something about the Clinton's. That cracked Wendy up. She was laughing and said she loves that guy.
Howard said Sean also believes that 9/11 was an inside job. Sean said it was a demolition and it didn't just topple over. Howard said he also believes that Greta Thunberg is a time traveler. Sean said it's definitely possible. Alex Jones agreed with him on that. Sean kept correcting them and saying he wants to be called Seany. They kept calling him anything but Seany. Howard said Sean also believes that there are Dog Men that he's seen. Sean said that right.
Howard said Lenny Dykstra is there. He said he talks a lot about sex. Lenny asked Robin to hang something for him over there. Howard moved on and asked what's going on with his podcast. Lenny said it's done. He said he isn't doing it anymore. He said Robin knows that she needs to do it with him. Howard moved on quickly from that.
Howard said Brent and Katelyn are there. Sean said he thinks Brent is an android. He said he wants to check for an access panel on him. Howard said he's worried about their marriage because of the swinging they do. He said he heard that Katelyn is upset about him breaking some rules out in California. Katelyn said they did lay down a lot of ground rules and he broke every rule pretty much. Howard said Brent broke them by trying to have sex twice out there. Katelyn said she thinks that it got to him and he was freaking out a little bit by the end of the week. She said that he got back and she found out he was trying to date every chick out there that he went out with. She said that Jenny was pissed because he broke things off with her. Katelyn said they talked it out and she broke no rules. She said she sent every text to him and when Brent got back he showed her some of his texts. She said that they were on the computer and they weren't deleted. Lenny asked how the slot is. Katelyn said she would think pretty good. Jackhammer said it is very good. He said she has a special bone in there.
Katelyn said she was told there's a bone that dips too low in there and she'd have to have a C-section if she had a kid. Jackhammer said that it's a very special bone. He said it was the first woman he's been with who had that. He said he's never had anything like that.
Howard said Brent has to be upset that this guy got to experience her bone. Brent said that's what he signed up for. Howard asked what happened in California. Brent said he got carried away out there.
Howard said he thinks it's time to play this game. He said they have Josette and Myk playing the game. He said he's going to have Myk go first. He kept calling him Mick.
Howard asked who Myk wants to pick first. Myk went with Wendy first. Wendy was asked if the president dies, who takes over? Wendy said God. Howard asked if he agrees or disagrees. Myk said he disagrees. Howard said he got that right.
Howard said Myk is on the board. He went to Josette next. She chose Nikki. Howard asked her if December 25th in Japan is national hand job day. Nikki said she's going to say that it's true. Howard asked if Josette agrees. She said she disagrees. Howard said it is false. He said national hand job day is actually July 21st.
Howard asked Jackhammer if he's seen any of his movies. Jackhammer got in a plug for his social media accounts and said you can check them out there. Howard asked Katelyn what it was like with him. She said it was very jackhammer like. She said he was going in and out very fast. Katelyn said she's into a rhythm more than a dance. Howard said he should do more of that than jackhammering. Katelyn said they talked it out before he came over. She said she would assume that they could have talked that out if they did it again.
Howard asked Myk who he wants to go with next. Myk said he's going with Ross. Ross said ''Rossy.'' Howard said it's great to have him there. Ross said it's great to be there. Howard said Hallmark removed the words gay from what popular song. Ross said it was the song ''Tis the Season.'' Howard asked Josette if she agrees or disagrees. She said she disagrees. She was right. It was Deck the Halls.
Howard asked Myk who is next. Myk picked Alex Jones. Howard asked a question about Starbucks writing something on their cup that upset people. Jon Hein interrupted and said that he messed up and he went with Josette even though it was Myk's turn. He said that should give Myk the square. He said they'll put an X on Ross and re-do the question. Howard said that was his fault. He had Josette go. She picked Lenny. Howard asked about what the inner lips of the vagina are called. Lenny said he calls them something different. Lenny said he's going to call them the Labia Cartas. Josette disagreed. Howard said she's right. He said it's the Labia Minora. Howard said he's woozy from this. Wendy asked Howard if she can help her friend out who only gets $7 an hour on YouTube. Howard said he can't help her out right now.
Howard asked Myk to pick another square. Myk picked Mark the Bagger. Mark got in a shout out for some football player. Howard asked if he's living with his mom still. Mark said he has his own place and he's looking for a woman. Nikki asked where he'd put her. Howard said there are a lot of women there. Mark said he wants Nikki. Howard said poor Wendy isn't getting hit on there today. He said once she gets that diaper off she'll be good. Howard asked Nikki if she had to be with Mark or Lenny who is she choosing. Nikki said Lenny just wants to eat her pussy. Mark said he wants to fuck her. Nikki said she'll go with Mark then. Howard said Lenny would fuck her. Lenny said he wants her not to feel her toes when he does his thing.
Howard asked Mark if he lied about jerking off yesterday. He said his manager says that he did it 3 times. Mark said he was out all day. Then he said he did jerk off once to porn.
Howard asked Mark the Bagger if it's true or false, the average speed of male ejaculation is faster than 25 miles per hour. Mark said true. Myk agreed. Howard said he's right and that is true and it travels at an average of 28 miles per hour.
Howard got back to Josette and asked her who she picks next. She picked Seany. Howard asked Sean which U.s. State has the most UFO sightings. Sean said he would say Hawaii. Josette said she disagrees. Howard said it's actually Washington. Sean asked if Lenny would eat out a Sasquatch or dog man. Lenny said he has no idea what the fuck he's talking about. Sean tried to explain. Lenny told him to listen. He told him what he's into and said he's not into this Sasquatch stuff. He said he's into natural things. He said something about pee stains in the underpants. Nikki was arguing that not every woman has that. Lenny said he's just saying that he likes it natural. He said he doesn't need the bolt ons like some women have. He was talking about implants apparently.
Howard asked Wendy if she's into Lenny. Wendy said she'd like him to take her to Disneyland. She said she's never been there. Wendy asked if Howard can help her friend out so he can make more money. Howard said they're in the middle of a game there.
Howard got back to Myk and asked who he's going with next. Myk went with Brent and Katelyn. Howard asked them why they backed out of the game at first. Katelyn said that they were kind of upset with the way things were going with Jackhammer. He was saying some stuff about them that wasn't true. He claimed he sent some shirts to the show and Brent threw them out. Brent said he didn't do such a thing. He said he gets the mail there but he didn't throw them out. Howard said Jackhammer said that Brent is physically and mentally soft. Jackhammer said that they weren't using his full name on the air and that was because of Brent. Jackhammer said Brent said that on the air. Brent and Katelyn argued about that with Jackhammer. Howard asked if he has any clothes on over there. Jackhammer said he has underpants on. Howard had him stand up so Ross can see him. He did that for him. Alex Jones took his shirt off too.
Howard asked if they can see his penis too. Jackhammer said he's going to pass because it's kind of cold in there.
Howard said he's not sure what's going on between Jackhammer and Katelyn. He said he thinks that Jackhammer feels that Brent has been blocking his access to the show. Brent said he doesn't have that power.
Howard asked if it's hot to have two men arguing over her. Katelyn said it's kind of weird.
Howard got back to the game and asked Brent and Katelyn if its true or false that 90 percent of open marriages end in divorce. Brent said that question is loaded. He said open marriages and swingers are different things. Brent said he's going to say that's true according to CNN. Katelyn disagreed with him. Brent said they're going with true. Howard asked if that's how the marriage goes. Katelyn said it depends on the situation. Katelyn said she'll go with him on that. Howard asked Myk what he thinks. Myk said he'll agree. Howard said that's right.
Howard said they have a lot of Xs and Os on the board. He said he's not sure if anyone has won. He said not yet.
Howard said it must be great for Brent to sit next to Lenny. Brent said he is a big fan. He said he saw him play some great games. Howard asked Lenny if he's into Katelyn. Lenny said for the right price. He said he might do it for free. Jackhammer told him to go for it. He said it's totally worth it. Lenny said he'd go through Brent first.
Gary said that the guys are saying that Brent thinks Lenny is a scum bag and he isn't being honest about him. Brent said he has respect for him as a baseball player but not for what he did in the courts. He said he ripped people off and got away with it. Lenny said he wants to fuck his wife and make her feel like nothing Brent could give her.
Howard got back to the game and asked Josette who she picks. She picked Alex Jones. Howard asked Alex what phrase was on the Starbucks cup that was instead of Merry Christmas. Alex said it was Merry Holidays. Josette disagreed. Howard said she's right. He said it as Merry Coffee.
Howard asked if they have a winner yet. Robin said she thinks it has to do with who wins the next square. Howard said Jackhammer is the one in that square. Jackhammer got in a plug for his friend Mike. Brent said shout outs are really great on the air. Howard asked if Katelyn would fuck Jackhammer again. She said she would if he didn't do what he did on Twitter. Howard asked if Brent would let her do that again. Brent said they're not going to do things apart anymore. He said someone can't handle it. Brent was talking about himself. Katelyn said Brent can't handle rules. Howard asked what Katelyn would do. She said she would suck Brent's dick while Jackhammer is dogging her.
Howard said it's Jackhammer's turn. He asked what he thinks about Brent saying that he's a 7. Howard asked Katelyn if she agrees. Katelyn said she does because women have said he's attractive. Jackhammer said he would rate him at like a 4.5 or 5. Jackhammer said he'd give himself an 8. Wendy said she has a six pack of wine coolers waiting for her at the hotel. Howard said he thinks Lenny is getting into this. Lenny said he's starting to get some blood flow for Katelyn. Howard said Brent would let him bang his wife. Brent said no way.
Howard asked Jackhammer what the 7th day in the 12 Days of Christmas song is. Jackhammer said something and Myk disagreed. Myk got that right and he won the game. Howard said he's going to give both Myk and Josette $2,000. He said he's just a great guy. He said he thought he was going to get 3 rounds in for this game.
Howard let Nikki plug her show ''U Up with Nikki Glaser'' that she does there on Sirius. Nikki mentioned she's still single and Mark the Bagger said he is too. Nikki said a lot of guys slid into her DMs and she just feels like she's emotionally unavailable. Nikki said she'd like to have sex again but she doesn't drink anymore. She said she has to like a man and it's hard for her to do that. Howard said Lenny and Mark are available. Jackhammer said he's available too.
Howard asked if Alex Jones has anything to plug. Fake Alex got in a plug for a product that Wendy might be able to use for diaper rash.
Howard said Ross has a book out called Name Drop: The Really Good Celebrity Stories I Usually Only Tell at Happy Hour. Ross said he's going out on tour too. He said you can find out about the tour on HelloRoss.com.
Howard let Mark the Bagger get in some plugs for his Cameo and things like that. Howard asked Nikki if she's going to do more roasts. Nikki said she's sure she will but she has a special coming out in Netflix at the end of the month. She said you might be able to see her vagina in the short dress she's wearing in that. Howard said he saw some of her in a mini skirt and she is hot. He said maybe people are distracted by that. Nikki said she's peaking at this point so she's wearing that stuff to look good. Lenny asked if she has a bush. Nikki said she gets it lasered off. Lenny asked Robin not to trim her Christmas tree. Robin said she shaves. Lenny said he lost his mind with that.
Howard got in another plug for Mark the Bagger. Mark went off on the Dallas Cowboys. He asked if he has more plugs. Mark repeated what he said earlier.
Howard thanked Wendy for coming in. He said he worries about her health. Wendy said she was bankrupt the past couple of years and she needs some money to buy gifts this year. Howard said they can talk about that after the show. He said they may have another $2,000 for her. He said they'll talk to her after the show. Howard said promise him one thing and tell him that's the last time she'll ask for money. Wendy said she promises. She said she's been trying to get up and walk and her mom has been crying because she's tire of seeing blood. Howard said he's not sure what's going on there.
Howard asked Wendy why she can't wait until she sits on a toilet to go doody. She said he can hold it but sometimes she can't. Howard said we all make doody. He said even Nikki and Sean make doody. Howard said he gets the feeling he has to go so he goes to the toilet and goes. He asked why Wendy can't do that. Wendy said she'll start doing that. She said when she tries to move it's hard for her to do it. Howard said they say that things are smelling bad over there. Wendy said she accidentally passed gas and she went in her diaper. Jackhammer said he can smell it over there. He said he could hear it too.
Lenny asked Robin if she's worth over $300 million. Wendy asked if she paid for that $800 wine. Robin said she did by giving Howard some bottles of more $800 wine.
Howard asked Seany if he has anything to plug. Sean said go Bills. He said he wanted to let him know the game cost him his friendship with Ass Napkin Ed. He said Ed is upset with him over that.
Wendy got in some plugs for her friends who are on YouTube. She said she goes on and listens to them on there. Howard asked if they're funnier than Nikki. Wendy said they are. Howard asked if she's being paid to do that. Wendy said they're paying her $200 for it. Wendy was going on and on about those guys. Then she started coughing. Howard asked if she's okay. Wendy said she is.
Howard asked if Lenny has any plugs. Lenny said he'd like to plug Robin and Jamie (Katelyn). Wendy kept asking for more shout outs and plugs. Sean asked if she can plug his Cameo.
Howard said Katelyn has said that she might be open to people feeling her breasts. Wendy was interrupting again. Wendy said that Katelyn is very hot. She said she likes her breasts. Howard asked if she would let her feel them. Katelyn said that's fine if she uses hand sanitizer on her hands first. Howard asked Brent if he has any plugs. He plugged HowardStern.com.
Wendy felt Katelyn up and said they feel really nice. She said that's the first time she's ever felt a woman up. She wanted to take her out and sing some karaoke.
Howard said he has to say goodbye to Jackhammer. He said he doesn't think that she'll have sex with Katelyn again. He asked if he has a plug. Jackhammer said you can check him out on Twitter @JohnnyJHammer.
Howard got in some plugs for the sponsors of the game. He had more prizes for the guests too. Howard went to break a short time later.
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Howard said he has one more thank you to the sponsors for Hollyweird Squares. He said that's where they got the money from. He said he was able to give some of that to Wendy. He said he saw that coming. Robin said she liked how she said she had to declare bankruptcy two years in a row.
Howard thanked the sponsors again. Howard said this is the end of their broadcast year. He said that he's been told that the game will be up on the app on Friday. He said you won't see better TV anywhere. He said how about Wendy feeling Katelyn up. He said Wendy liked it.
Howard took a call from Michael Rapaport who wasn't there today and he wished he was. Michael said he's out shooting something. He said he wasn't able to make it. Michael said that he thought Jon Hein wrangling the game was great. He said it was a high point in the show history. He said he wanted to ask Lenny a question about Brent letting his wife fuck other men. Howard said he should have been there to ask. Michael said he's taking a little vacation. He said he's in Miami Beach with his wife and no other men are with her or looking at her. He said they had to take a break.
Howard said Michael beat JD in fantasy football over the weekend. Robin said they were talking about that last week. Howard said he's also beating Richard Christy in the final round. JD explained how he lost to Michael.
Howard said he's watching that show A Typical that Michael is on and he's enjoying it. He said he was almost in the game but he's on vacation so he didn't make it. Howard said that's it. He let Michael go after that. Robin said she's exhausted from the show.
Howard said one of their contestants got shit on by her father. He said he also threw up on her head. He said that's a fucking story. He said then you mix everyone together and it's a lot. He said they had all of those contestants. He said he did love that whole set up.
Howard said they had the great Alex Jones in there. He said he came in at the last minute. He said Sour Shoes was stranded on the side of the road.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked how he puts up with all of these degenerates he has in there. Howard asked who's a degenerate. He hung up on the guy.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he loves them. He said whatever they paid Wendy they should double it. He said she's the best Wack Packer that ever existed. Howard said it's hard to disagree with him. He said being center square is the toughest. He said she handled it just fine. Robin said she didn't seem to have any pressure at all.
Howard said they might have to do the game more often. He said it was a lot of fun. Howard took a call from Mariann from Brooklyn who said that she thinks the next threesome is going to be Brent, Katelyn and Lenny. She said she can't believe this is the last show of the year. Howard hung up on her in the middle of her saying something.
Howard said that Gary said something about Lenny. Gary said Brent said he didn't like Lenny because he was guilty and Lenny said the only thing he's guilty of is fucking his wife.
Howard took a call from Pocket who said that game was a train wreck. He said it all started with Sour Shoes. Howard said they tried to get him in there. Gary said they had a car waiting at his house. He said he did have car trouble and they sent an Uber but he said he can't leave his car behind. He said Sour had to be in the car. He said he heard noises in the back and he wasn't sure if he was being pranked or not. Howard said he thinks Sour just bailed out. Pocket said that whole thing didn't make sense. Howard said that's what makes Sour so funny. He said he's not sure what they're even talking about now. Howard said they're back in the ditch with Sour Shoes now.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he wanted to thank him for not allowing Bobo, High Pitch Erik and Jeff the Drunk be part of the game. Robin wondering if Jeff boycotted. Howard said he's sure he listened.
Howard said he took some clips from his Christmas Periscope and he can demonstrate what they missed out on. Howard said Jeff was drinking beer and singing. Howard played a clip of Jeff singing and his music was so loud you could barely hear his voice. Howard said the trailer acoustics may not be so great.
Howard played Jeff singing ''Silent Night'' and said maybe they should have had him in. He said he's always stoned when he comes in there though.
Howard said he has to play another clip. He said in the middle of a broadcast he stopped to record a Cameo for someone. He said he can't understand a word he's saying in this one. He played the clip and Jeff did his thing for this guy and he was slurring his words.
Howard asked who is paying this money. He asked who has 75 bucks to waste. Howard played another clip of Jeff belching and almost throwing up. He was grunting and making odd noises too. Howard said you can't miss with that. He said he sounds like a Star Wars creature.
Howard took a call from a guy who said the game was full of fireworks. Howard said his favorite thing to do is mix it up with celebrities and the Wack Pack. He said Nikki looked pretty disturbed by the whole thing. He said Lenny was constantly coming on to Robin and Nikki. He said then he moved on to Katelyn just to get back at Brent. The caller said there was some great stuff in there with Nikki. Howard said he thinks Lenny has a shot with Nikki just like he does with Robin. Robin said she loves how when Nikki said she was single Mark the Bagger raised his hand and said he is too.
Howard took a call from Apples who asked if they can get some ASMR from all of the players. Howard said no way. He said he wants to know who listens to that crap.
Howard took a call from a guy who said the game was awesome but he can't believe they have to wait until Friday to see it on the app. He said he can't wait to see Brent's milky white face turn red when they talk about all of this. Howard said it sounds like he's angry with Brent. The caller said he doesn't like Michael Rapaport but they should keep the cameras rolling... Howard cut him off and said that guy was talking too slow. He said he was getting aggravated. Robin said she was too.
Howard said that's why he hides in his house. He said he'll be hiding in his house during vacation. He did a live commercial read and went to break after that.
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Howard said he feels like he has something in his throat. He said he's eating fruit while he's on the air and he's rushing. He said that's not the right thing to do.
Robin said she's thinking about how Howard could be a grandparent at any time now. Howard said he guesses. Robin said there are grandparents who want to baby sit and some who never do. Howard said that's not his thing. He said if you have a kid then sit at home and watch the kid yourself. Robin said Richard's mother in law spends all of her time with their kid. Howard said she's the only one they trust. It's like she has no life and nothing better to do. Howard said he sees these people who have kids and they have to ask someone to watch them. Howard said do it yourself.
Robin said that Oprah is buying more stock in Weight Watchers. Robin said they're calling it WW now. Howard asked why change the name at this point. He said the company name is fine. He said he's sure she battles with weight loss but she's a heavy woman and it's not working on her. He said she's not a good spokesperson. He said it would be like Howard Stern buying stock in the Handsome Club. He said he's got no business being in there. He said he follows Oprah on Instagram. He said he likes her. He said Weight Watchers doesn't make sense for her. Robin said there's a different Oprah on her magazines. She said they must have stockpiled her photos from years ago. Howard said he can't believe that she's the weight watchers spokesperson. He said it would be like if Gary bought a controlling interest in the tiny teeth club. He did his Gary impression talking about that. Howard said he doesn't hate Oprah. He said he follows her on Instagram. He said Opah thinks he hates her. He doesn't hate her but Weight Watchers isn't working for her. He said it would be like having a Benjy skin cream. He doesn't want skin like Benjy.
Howard and Robin talked about the woman who started Weight Watchers and how she stayed thin. Howard said it's not working for Oprah.
Howard took a call from Bobo who said he has to say that he gives much respect to Brent going on the game today. He said he's not sure how he could sit there with Jackhammer. Howard said Brent sat there next to him and did fine. Howard said it has to bother him when she's talking about how Jackhammer pounded her when he was out of town. Howard let Bobo go after that. He wished him a Merry Christmas.
Robin brought up Madonna and this boyfriend she has. Howard said he saw some pictures of them and it looked like the guy was smoking something. He said they were making a big deal that the boyfriend is like 25 or 26 and her daughter is 23. Howard said there's nothing wrong with that. He said they're old enough. He said he gets that she wants a young guy. He said when you hang with a guy that young you tend to look older. He said hang out with a guy his age if you want to look younger. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about Kylie Jenner saying that she gets some of her Christmas decor at Target. Robin had some audio of her talking about that. Howard said he's sure she got a couple million bucks for doing that. Howard said his wife loves to go to Target.
Howard took a call from a guy who said they hit it out of the park today. He said it was so funny when Howard said something to Jackhammer about petting Brent's dog. Howard said the idea of having the guy in his house is so odd to him. He said the guy was in his house. He asked Brent how he's doing over there. He said he heard that Katelyn didn't wash the sheets after that. Gary said they're searching for Brent. He said he'll find him. He said he's doing fine. Howard let the caller go.
Howard said he doesn't know where Brent is or where Katelyn and Jackhammer are. Brent came in and said that he was just with Katelyn. He said he was the one going off the rials, not her. Howard asked if he just came running in there. Brent said he did. Howard said Jackhammer was petting his dog and looking at the stuff in his apartment. He said that's got to be weird. Robin said they should have seen if the dog would come to Jackhammer or Brent first. Brent said the dog would come to him. He said there's no way the dog would go to that guy. He said the dog is very friendly. He said she's a German Sheppard.
Howard said he was worried about Brent after that. Brent said it's all good. Howard asked if it's true she didn't wash the sheets after. Brent said they didn't get to the sheets. He said they were on a duvet cover and she threw that out or washed it.
Brent said that Katelyn said that Howard was right when it came to the California thing. He said she said he can't fucking handle it. Howard asked how funny it was to see Wendy feeling up Katelyn. Brent said that was great. He said she's got a crush on his wife. Howard said that was some soft swinging. Brent said his wife is hot. He said wait until you see her dress tonight. He said Howard will like it. He said it's a dress meant for the Christmas party. Howard said Jackhammer is coming too. He was kidding.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he feels so bad for how that guy disrespected Brent. He said he gives ugly guys like him hope. He said he was kind of in the same situation with a married woman that he was hooking up with. He said the way that guy shit on him is wrong. Howard said he didn't know they were fighting online. Brent said he found that kind of weird but he wasn't fighting with him. He said he found out about the guy bad mouthing him through Memet.
Howard asked if Brent would be into doing a threesome. Brent said they are thinking about doing one with another woman. He said they get off on having experiences and telling each other about it. Brent said they tell stories about other people in their lives. Howard said he wouldn't want to hear about guys Beth has been with. Brent said everyone is different. He said that's what makes life so great. Howard said he's glad Brent and Katelyn came in and played.
Howard asked Brent what the best story is that Katelyn ever told him. Brent said her parents kept her under lock and key before college. He said when she got into college she had a fuck buddy. She said one time she went over to the guy's apartment and ended up having sex with both of the guys in the apartment. Howard said that's not so strange. Brent said he thinks with that story Howard told that the girl and the guy were trying to get something going. Howard said now is a great time to find out. He said someone should have told him back then. Howard let Brent go and did a live commercial read.
Robin read a story about how Jennifer Aniston had Justin Theroux to her house and then she had a 50th birthday party and she had Brad Pitt to that. Robin said she also had Gwyneth Paltrow there who also had a relationship with Brad. Howard said no one is uptight anymore. He said that's the mature way to deal with it. Robin said she's not sure why people get so upset when they break up. Robin said they want to kill the other person when they do. Howard said he thinks when you break up with Brad Pitt no one stays mad at you for long. He said he has experienced a lot with his face. He said no one invites him anywhere after they break up with him.
Robin read a story about Mariah Carey having a number 1 hit on the billboard charts. She had Howard play the song ''All I Want For Christmas.'' Robin said 25 years ago the big hit was the Chipmunks Christmas song. Robin said that gives Mariah 19 number 1 hits on the Billboard charts. Howard asked what Robin is saying about this song. Robin said the song has been out for 25 years and it just went to number 1 this Christmas. Robin said it's not a new song but it went to number 1 anyway. Robin said that means that she's catching up to The Beatles. Howard played Robin singing the Mariah Carey song. Howard said how about people who cover number 1 songs. He cut that off and said he's heard enough of that.
Robin read a story about Whoopi Goldberg and Meghan McCain having been friends in the past but yesterday they got into it on The View. Robin had some audio for Howard to play. Meghan was talking over the other women and Whoopi cut her off saying that she has to stop talking. They cut to break after Whoopi went off on her about that. Robin said Meghan didn't say a word the rest of the show after that. Howard said it sounds like the other women were interrupting Meghan. He said Whoopi didn't say anything to her about that. Howard said he likes all of the fighting but they should make out to make up after. Robin said that looked pretty serious. Howard asked if Whoopi is in charge on that show. Robin said she is when she's there working. She said she has Fridays off so Joy Behar is in charge then. Robin said it seems like Meghan is always giving her explanation of what the other side is thinking instead of giving her own opinion like the other women are doing. She said that might be the problem. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about Rudy Giuliani being accused of pushing out ambassador to Ukraine Marie Yovanovitch. Robin said he went on FOX News last night and admitted it. Robin had some audio of him talking about that.
Robin read a story about the democrats having a defection in the house. Robin said a New Jersey congressman has switched sides. Robin said Jeff Van Drew is the congressman and a bunch of his staff walked out when they found out he was doing that. Howard asked how you can get elected and switch office. He said you're supposed to represent the people who voted for you. Robin said there is no law saying you can't do that. Howard said if he did that with a product he'd be brought up on charges for false advertising. Robin said he was afraid that he wouldn't get reelected in his district and he felt it would be bad for him if the impeachment happened.
Howard took a call from Ralph who said Meghan McCain is good on the show but she won't shut up. He said Whoopi just had it and she had to get her in line. He said he's a big fan of the show so he knows from watching.
Robin read a story about the impeachment starting tomorrow. Robin said the President is holding a rally in Michigan while that's going on. Robin said there are plans for more than 500 rallies from coast to coast to call for the impeachment of the president. Robin said people are taking to the streets.
Robin read a story about the storm moving across the country that's causing deaths. Robin said 3 people were killed by tornados in the south.
Robin read a story about a former guest of theirs standing trial on rape charges. Robin said Victor Ortiz is that person. Robin said he was married to Jenna Jameson for a while. Robin said she thinks about how in love they were back then. Robin said they're not together anymore but they have children together. Robin had said Victor Ortiz earlier so Howard thought she was talking about Tito. Howard said they could get in trouble for that. Robin said they had Victor in the copy. She said maybe she's wrong and maybe it was Victor. Howard said he doesn't know what's going on right now. Howard said Victor is being accused of rape, not Tito. He straightened all of that out and said Victor was never on the show. It's not Tito, it's Victor who is being accused.
Robin read a story about the ninth and final installment of the Star Wars saga opening on Friday. Howard asked if people still get charged up with that. Howard said he lost interest in Star Wars. Robin said she's seen them all. Howard said he's out of that universe. Robin said Disney shut down their entire block around the Dolby Theater. Robin said they had a premiere with the cast. Robin said it started back in 1977. Howard said Adam Driver is in a show on Netflix that's really good. Robin said it's called Marriage Story and it's very good. Howard asked if any of the Ortiz family are in it. Robin said she mixed up a name and she's sorry. Robin read more about the Star Wars thing. She said this is it for that Star Wars saga. Robin wrapped up her news. Howard thanked the audience for listening and he wished everyone great holidays ahead and peace, love and joy. He said they'll see them in the new year. Howard ended the show around 11:15am.
Today's show was over around 11:30am.
Today's show was over around 10:50am.
Today's show was over around 11:10am.