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Howard said his test just came back. He revealed that he's negative now. He said Beth came down and gave him the second test and then snapped a picture of him with the stick up his nose. He said she asked if she could post it. Howard said he told her no. He said wrote her a message that he's negative.
Howard said he had a stomach ache and a fever. Robin said he always thinks he has a fever. Howard said he was burning up. He said he's not using a thermometer though. Howard said his mother used to take his temperature anally. He did his impression of his mother telling him why they did that.
Howard said he was busy with his mother this weekend. He said she passed out for a second and then she was fine. He said she went limp going to the bathroom. He said she's 95. He said all kinds of things happen. He said he asked if she wants to go to the hospital and she said no. Robin asked what they're going to do. Howard said that's what she said.
Howard said he has a tummy ache. He said they went out to eat last night and sat outside. He said everyone tells him to get back out there in the world so they're back out. Robin said they were in Miami all last week and he was running around. She said he may want to take a break. Howard said they're trying to get back out there. He said he has to get out there. He said if he gets COVID he's getting it. He said his daughter told him if you've never had it then you've had NOVID. He said that's what they call it. Robin asked if you have more chances of getting it. Howard said it means nothing.
Howard said when Anitta came in he actually shook her hand. He said there you go. Robin said he just lost it.
Jason told Howard about how the party started out fun but it took a super dark turn and they had to talk people off ledges and stuff. He said people were running away and people were quitting the show. He said it was crazy.
Howard asked how many people were crying. Jason said he saw at least 2 men crying. Gary said he saw the same 2. He said it was JD and Chris Wilding. Howard chuckled.
Gary said that he started on this bar crawl and he had to leave to go to the Carrie Underwood sound check. He said he went back and walked into this. He said there was a lot going on. He said alcohol had to be taken off the table.
Howard asked JD what kind of man he is. He said he has tape of him crying. He said he has to set him straight about some things. He said if Ronnie is walking around feeling depressed don't blame him. He said this is JD crying in these clips. He said JD was crying on tape and telling him he felt bad for Ronnie over this stuff. Howard said that's what happens when you retire. He said he felt weird about seeing Billy being there. He said he took his job.
Ronnie was there so he didn't quit the show. Howard said he's going to play this tape and then question Ronnie like he's Trump at his deposition. He got side tracked and went off on Trump about his deposition and how he fucked that up. He said he thinks the jury is going to find him to be a rapist. Howard said they asked him if he said that he can grab women by the pussy and he said yes. He said then he went ''But...'' and talked about how stars are different and it's been that way for a million years. He said there hasn't been Hollywood for a million years.
Howard said he saw a poll that said he could beat Biden in the next election though. He said people don't seem to care. Robin said they really don't care even though they're always talking about women's rights and things.
Howard said they have to talk about that coronation that went on over in England too. He said that whole ceremony made it seem like that guy did something great for the country. He said the whole thing is fucking nuts. He said in this day and age... He said it was so boring. Blitt said he wants to get JD dressed up like that in the city. He said he wants to tell people that he's the new King.
Howard said it was disgusting. He said it doesn't take a brain surgeon to say this but they have financial issues over there and they spent how much on that ceremony. He said he knows that they keep that monarchy to bring people over there. He said he gets why they do it. He said it's just so ridiculous.
Howard said they had King Charles and Camilla on American Idol. He said they marched them out on there. Robin said their whole job is based on people liking them and that's why they did the show.
Howard played some audio of the music they had playing at the coronation. He said it's so ridiculous. He said he wants that played when he walks into the room at Sirius. He said they can all bow to him. He said that would be cool. Robin said the best thing about that whole thing was that he didn't bother to remember one thing he had to say. She said he was reading it all. JD said everyone was reading cue cards. Howard said he's a stiff. He said he prepared his whole life for that and it shows how lazy royalty is. He said it was his big day and that's how he did it.
Howard and the guys spent a little time talking about the American Idol bit that King Charles did. Howard had more audio of Charles walking down the aisle. He laughed at the music they were playing. Howard said at one point this archbishop was talking. He said he's not sure what happened but this guy started singing. He played a clip of that and goofed on it for a short time.
Howard said it's fucking nuts what they do. The guys talked about the clothing they were wearing and how nuts the whole thing is.
Howard said the recognition is where they present the king to the people. He played a clip of that happening. Howard said that gives him the heebie jeebies. Blitt said it sounds like a cult. Robin said it is a cult if you believe that guy is King. Howard said he's an American boy and he believes that everyone should be given a fair chance. He said a monarchy is just where you're born into it. He said they didn't even have to joust for it or anything. He said they had a part where he was presented jewelry. He said it was a bunch of King stuff. Howard played a clip from that part of the coronation. He said early in the monarchy the king was a guy who would kick ass. He said that's not the case anymore.
Chris was doing an English accent and making stuff up that they could have presented to him.
Howard said they anointed him with this special oil. He said in the past they used wax from a sperm whale. Howard and the guys made stuff up about that and goofed on it for a short time.
Howard said Ronnie was around when King Arthur was anointed, what was that like. Ronnie gave him a dry ''Ha ha'' over that.
Howard said they didn't use anything from a whale in that coronation. He said King Charles made it with something else. He had a clip from Newsmax where they said that they had whale sperm in the oil. Howard said that woman has no idea what she's talking about. He said it's not whale sperm, it's the intestinal wax of a sperm whale. He said she also said something about an elf and how they were going to use the sperm from the elf.
Howard said the best part of the ceremony was when Camilla was coming down the aisle and they were singing a song for her. He said it sounded like they were singing ''I like vagina Camilla.'' He played a clip of the choir singing the song that did sound like they were singing about vagina. Howard laughed and Fred played some Beavis and Butt-Head laughs.
Howard answered a knock at the door and fake Donald Trump came on and said he should have been king. He said the queen begged him to be King. He said the King's wife is a 3 at most.
Howard had fake Governor DeSantis come on too after answering a knock at the door. Howard let the fake DeSantis go on and on about Disney, trans people and stuff like that.
Howard asked fake DeSantis why he's running for president. He was going on and on about the left's agenda and all of that. Fake Trump said ''Boring!'' He said he has to say that you can't trust DeSantis because he's never cheated on his wife.
Howard kept this bit going for a really long time. It seemed like no one wrote any funny material for this DeSantis impersonator. Fake Trump said he was more boring than the coronation.
Fake Trump took a fake piss on fake DeSantis for a minute. Howard had to cut them off from the piss because it was going on for a long time.
Howard asked the fakes how they would handle the situation with China and Taiwan if they were in office. Howard let them go on and on for another minute before ending the bit. Fake Trump took another piss on fake Ron before Howard closed the fake door on them.
Howard said that coronation was so hard to watch. He said he has to talk to Ed Sheeran about that idol thing when he's on later this week. He said that he did think it was funny that Prince Harry showed up and they sat him behind a woman with that huge cap. He said in some ways he's inspired by that guy. He said he left that whole monarchy thing. He said he is a whiny guy though. He said it's a bit much. He said he has Prince Harry audio book to play. He has him talking about the coronation. He played that bit where they had edited Harry into saying some insulting stuff about the coronation.
Howard asked if he should bail on this or does Robin want more. Robin asked if they have him saying anything important. Howard said he's only playing this because they put so many hours into editing it. He played a few more clips of audio book Harry saying wild stuff.
Howard asked if Richard put that together. Richard said they have a team that does it now. He said they have an awesome team that should take a bow as well. Howard asked if AI is going to ruin that bit. Richard said he doesn't think so. He said there's something funny about the choppiness of it.
Howard asked how many hours Richard put into that. Richard said they started in February. He said they edit the writing and they have to edit the clips and it takes a long time. Howard asked how many are on the team. Richard said he thinks there's 4. Howard said 4 guys have been working on that since February. Richard said it's not just on that. He said they work on other stuff.
Howard said his wife asked why he wasn't in Miami. He asked if he felt left out. Richard said a little bit. He said but with this bit he had so much work to do that he was plenty busy. He said it sounds like everyone had a blast. Richard said he wants to give a shout out to the people who helped with the bit. Richard said it was Mike Trainor, Rich Gibbons and others were part of that. Howard said he had no idea that Rich was involved in that. He said he's a good man.
Howard played more of the audio book Prince Harry bit. He said that he should fire all of them for that. He said he can't even understand half of what they have him saying. Richard said it's really funny. Howard played another clip and it is really hard to follow at times. They have him going on these really long rants.
Howard asked Richard how long it takes to do that. Richard said they have a system now. He said that in the old days he had to go listen to 8 hours of an audio book. He said now there's a system where you can search for words in an audio book. He said it probably took a week to get him to say ''curly long pubic hair.''
Howard played another clip they had edited where they had Harry going on and on about something. Howard thanked Richard and said it's much easier for him to just put his dick on Sal's lip. He asked Robin if she thinks that was worth it. Robin said she's not sure. She said one of those things went on and on and on. She said it could have used some editing.
Howard said that took 3 months. He said bring that up at his yearly review. Howard said he has to take a break and get to what happened in Miami. Robin said she can't imagine all of the crying and fighting. She said it sounds like it was a nightmare. Howard said it was nuts.
Howard said he was glad he went to Miami. He said he thought it was great. He did a live commercial read and went to break.
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Howard came back and said this song started out as a jam session and they came back and added lyrics to it later. He said he was just 27 when he died. He spent a little time talking about how died and how good he was.
Howard said that Gary seems to think that he's going to be in the rock and roll hall of fame. He said that Ahmet Erdogan is in but he wasn't in a band. Howard said he doesn't think he's ever going to be in the hall of fame. He said they have a lot of inductees this year who don't belong in there. He said Soundgarden did not make it in. He said that's insane. He said he voted for them. He said Kate Bush is in. He said he's not sure who that even is. He said her big song was included in Stranger Things. He said the song had a revival. He played the song he was talking about. He said he didn't know the song the first time. He said he's not sure why Jethro Tull isn't in the hall of fame. He said he's not sure who has a stick up their ass over them. He said it's fucking criminal.
Gary said he doesn't think they're ever been nominated. Howard said someone must really hate the flute.
Howard said he's not sure who voted for the Spinners. Robin said Gary did. Howard said Gary has the worst musical taste. He said here are so many bands that should be in before The Spinners. He said how about Smashing Pumpkins, The Black Crowes and others.
Howard said Missy Elliot and Kate Bush are in. He said George Michael he kind of gets. He said he gets Willie Nelson. He said that Rage Against the Machine finally got in. He said he has no issue with that. He said he doesn't think Joe Cocker is even in it. Gary said he's not. Howard asked if Oasis is in. Gary said he's not sure if they're eligible. Howard said they have to be. He said it has to be over 25 years.
Howard said he doesn't think that Jane's Addiction is in. He said that Peter Frampton isn't in it but Kate Bush is. He said that her last name is funny though. He said he'll give you that.
Gary asked if he thinks The Spinners or Kate Bush. Howard said The Spinners. Gary said he can't name more than two of her songs.
Howard asked if Kate Bush or Peter Frampton should be in. Gary said Frampton of course. Howard said the guy has had a bigger career than she has. He said he would put that Psy ''Gangnam Style'' guy in there before Kate Bush. He said he's not kidding about that. He said Boston isn't in there either.
Gary said they have a group of like 25 people who get in a room and throw out the names of the bands. Howard said they're not doing a good job. Howard played some Boston and asked if you've heard this or Kate Bush on radio more. He said he doesn't get it.
Howard said maybe Dave Grohl has a good sense of humor and thought Kate Bush sounded funny.
Howard said Bad Company is not in the hall of fame. He said come on. He said he should start his own hall of fame. He said that band is great. He asked Fred to find the live version of Shooting Star. He asked Fred if there's a better voice than Paul Rogers. Fred said no. He said he agrees with him about the Kate Bush thing. He said that the Spinners should not even be nominated. He said Jethro Tull should be in there before them. Gary said he's not the one making the nominations. Howard asked Fred to play the live version of that song. Fred said he can't find the live one. He said this is the album version of Bad Company.
Howard answered a knock at the door and it was the head of the hall of fame... Wendy the slow adult clips. Howard spent a minute talking to her about the nominations and if she has a giant bush. She said yes. They had Wendy answering yes to a lot of his questions.
Howard said how about Emerson Lake and Palmer. He said that's a good band. He said he saw them perform and they were great. Fred played some Emerson Lake and Palmer ''Bitches Crystal.'' Howard asked him to play something more commercial even though he likes that. He said that they have ''Lucky Man'' too. Fred played that for him.
Howard asked if Stone Temple Pilots is in the hall of fame. Gary said no. Howard said what a horrible organization. He said Stone Temple Pilots isn't in. They played some ''Interstate Love Song.'' Howard talked up the song as that was starting.
Howard said how about Weezer. He said those guys are good. He said they're not in but Kate Bush is. He said that he has to point out the inequity of this. Fred played some Weezer for him. They played a few of their hits. Robin asked if he cares at all about Bachman Turner Overdrive. Howard said not really. He said over Kate Bush yes. Howard said this song is so good. Fred had ''Hash Pipe'' playing. Fred played some ''You Ain't Seen Nothing Yet'' from Bachman Turner Overdrive too.
Howard said come on with this. He said that Kate Bush is talented but come on. He said all of these bands should be in ahead of her. Howard had Fred playing Procol Harem's ''A Whiter Shade of Pale.'' Howard said this band isn't in the hall of fame either. He said he really has to get to the Miami stuff.
Fred asked where he stands on King Crimson and played some of their ''In the Court of the Crimson King'' and Howard said this is another great song. He spent a little time talking about how great the song is. He let it play for a couple of minutes and talked about what he would do at his own coronation. He would have that song playing as he did some wild stuff. Howard and Robin spent more time talking about the King Charles coronation too.
Gary said it was so fucked up that he and Jason had to call their wives to decompress. He said that he left for a while and when he came back Ronnie's sash that he started out with was tied around his head.
Jason said he called his wife at the hotel and he was trying to process stuff. He said he told her it was the worst experience he's had working on the show. He said nothing terrible happened but the bad feelings and the amount of talking people down was hard. He said they were trying to talk people into not quitting the show.
Howard asked Wolfie if he was there. Wolfie said he was. He said they had split up some duties there. He said he was assigned to Ronnie the whole night. He said he captured it all that night. He said it was such a buzz kill that night though. Gary said it really was. He said you could feel the tension in the air. He said he asked what was going on and people were crying there.
Howard said at the start of the night Sal was there. He said he got a sign that it was going to be filled with love and spirituality. He said that this is him talking about that. He played a clip and asked Sal how he could be so wrong. Chris said it's almost like he's totally full of shit. Howard asked if Sal was part of the chaos. Sal said he was and it was insane. Derek said that Sal was somehow the most behaved person there.
Gary said he walked with Sal at one point and he said he was going to remain calm there but then he grabbed the microphone and went on a 10 minute rant.
Blitt said he asked him what he would do if he was in the red danger zone. He said Sal never let himself get there.
Howard said Chris was there crying. He said Jason and Sal were there. He said Blitt, Wolfie, JD, Gary and others were there. He said Ronnie was there of course. Blitt said he was following JD around and he had his hands on his head. He said he didn't know what to do. JD said he was having a breakdown in front of Wolfie and he didn't want that. Jason said he was crying all over the place. He said that Sal had a move where he orders an extra shot with his drinks. He said he calls it as a heavy drink.
Howard asked Sal what's wrong with him. Sal said they were out having a good time and the drinks tasted like fruit juice. He said he got his zing though.
Howard asked Derek why he was there and if he was close with Ronnie. Derek said he is. He said he drove him to get his ring for his wife at Steven Singer. He said he was producing this with Memet and Mike. Howard asked Mike if he was there too. Mike Pearlman said he had a good time there. He said things did get crazy though.
The guys said that Sal had a female producer to be his creep advisor. Howard asked Sal what it is about him that he has to turn to a coworker to do that for him. Sal said alcohol was involved. He said it changes you and he didn't want to be that person. He said he wanted someone to just nudge him. Robin said how about don't drink at all. Sal said he has to take that chance. He said it was just additional reassurance. He said he can't gauge himself. He said it worked. He said things were good.
Gary said how about the next morning when they were together and Sal stared at him like he had no recollection of what he did that night.
Howard said Ronnie is still annoyed at Pearlman. Ronnie said he ruined the whole night for everyone. The guys said that's one way to look at it. Ronnie said he wouldn't let up and just have a good time. He said he kept digging at him. He said that everyone was having a good time and he kept digging at him. He said he had a drink in a pineapple and he was goofing on him and didn't let it go. He said Mike is the one who ruined the night.
Howard said he has to get to the party. He said it started out good but went off the rails. He said that Mike accused him of wearing the same shirt for 3 days in a row. Howard said that's what set Ronnie off. Howard played a clip. Ronnie insisted it was a different shirt. He apparently lunged at him. Then he threw a drink at him and told him to go home.
Ronnie said they were having fun and Mike ruined it. He said it was different things. He said he kept digging at him and it wouldn't stop. He said he started with Chris too. Chris said that he got hit with the drink. Ronnie said he got a whole lecture that he was ruining the night. Derek said they just had to separate everyone. He said that they were just telling him when you throw a drink it takes it to the next level. He said they had to have everyone chill out.
Ronnie said he's not the one who did anything. The guys said that he did throw the drink. Ronnie said he didn't hit anyone. Derek said he hit a lot of people with that drink.
Jason said that Ronnie was the one talking about Mike and calling him names. Ronnie said he was doing that but not to his face. Mike said things were fun and they were trading digs the whole night. He said that Ronnie seems to like these Hawaiian shirts and it looked like the same one he was wearing. Derek said they were arguing over that while they were 10 feet away from this beautiful beach.
Howard said the guys had to take Ronnie away from the group and calm him down. He had some audio of the guys trying to calm him down. Ronnie was going on and on about how he didn't want to hear about his shirt from Mike. He said he can't wait to get out of there. He said he can't wait to get on his plane. Derek and Memet were trying to talk him down. Ronnie wasn't having it.
Howard said this is terrible. He said it was supposed to be a celebration. Gary said Ronnie was taking it personally and it was like he was being accused of being a dirt bag. Mike said maybe he said it the wrong way. He said he didn't mean anything by it.
Howard said there was a happy ending and Mike and Ronnie hugged it out. He played a clip of Mike apologizing to Ronnie. They ended up hugging it out. Memet said that love wins in Florida.
Howard said Mike ended up upsetting Chris Wilding. He said that he was talking during Mike's speech and yelled at Chris and that led to Chris getting upset. Chris was trying to answer Wolfie about something. Mike yelled at him and Chris got upset. Mike said he was saying that in a joking way. He said he went an asked if he was okay after that.
Howard asked why Chris was upset. Gary said things were very tense and Mike was trying to release the tension. He said he was being funny. Mike said he did come of a little harsh.
Howard said Chris went off to another bar to drink alone. He said Memet caught up with him and asked why he was upset. He played a clip of Chris talking about how Mike should know his place and he's kind of a piece of shit. He was taking the microphone off and saying he was going to go back to his hotel room. He said he's done there. He said they wouldn't serve him anymore.
Howard said Chris went to another bar to drink. Chris said it was the same place but just a different part of it. He said he listened back to the tape and Mike did not deserve his words. He said he is embarrassed by that tape. He said he may have been parroting what Ronnie was saying. He said Mike didn't deserve that from him.
Howard said all of that affected JD and he got upset and emotional. JD said he and Sal were with Ronnie and he was talking about how he wanted to leave and get out of there. He said he thought they were going to blame all of this on him. He said Sal kept saying they were all good. Howard said JD is like the kid whose parents fight all the time and he can't take it. JD said Ronnie was in a dark place. He said he was talking about leaving and stuff.
Howard said this is JD at the bar. He played a clip and JD was talking to Wolfie about what was going on and he was getting upset. He was talking about how Ronnie was talking about being pushed out or whatever. He was snorting and sounded like he was crying talking to Wolfie about Ronnie. He said that he thinks he was thinking about new personalities on the show and how he's being phased out. He said that doesn't make him feel great. He said he doesn't like that Ronnie feels that way.
Howard asked what that snorting is. JD said that's him trying to stop from crying. Howard said JD doesn't even perceive the situation properly. He said he gave Ronnie a job when he retired. He said he still works on the show. JD said that he was thinking about how Ronnie was perceiving things. Ronnie asked what he's talking about. He said he didn't say that. JD said he did say that at one point. Ronnie said maybe it was the alcohol talking if he did say that. He said he was very emotional after seeing Howard after 3 years. He said he got emotional.
Howard asked Mike what he thinks about that. Ronnie said here we go. He said this is how it goes. Mike said that he thinks going into the studio left an emotional toll on him.
Jason said there was a point when Ronnie said he was going to go home and not come on the show the next day. JD said that Ronnie wanted to go to the strip club and he wanted to stay there until 5am and go to the show the next day. He said he didn't want to do that. Howard asked if Ronnie went to the club. Ronnie said he did not go.
Howard said this is more of JD crying. He played a clip of JD talking about the strip club thing and how he didn't want him going alone. He said he didn't want him feeling this way about the other guys there. He was trying to stop himself from crying again.
Derek said they had two big security guards with them and they were looking at them like they were crazy crying over this stuff. He said they had to separate Pearlman and Ronnie. Wolfie said the security guard said they weren't anticipating an internal threat there. Howard said they were there to hand them tissues.
Howard said he kind of gets Ronnie going nuts but he's not sure why JD was crying. JD said he was thinking about how Ronnie was feeling.
Howard answered a knock at the door and it was fake Joe Pesci going off on all of the crying crew there.
Robin said she loves that Ronnie was saying that a strip club would clear his mind. Ronnie said that's right.
Howard said these guys have to calm down with the drinking. He asked Sal how many he had. Sal said he had enough to overload him.
Gary said that they have video of this. He said Sal was eating a salad with his hands. He said he kept shoveling the food in his mouth when he got him a second salad and put it in front of him without him knowing.
Howard asked if Sal was making out with Chris. Sal said he sat on his lap and he gave him a peck on the lips. He said it was a friendly kiss. He said it wasn't a make out. Chris said things were very loving. He said that he thought Sal was hard but he doesn't know.
Howard said this is Sal talking about what's socially acceptable these days. He was drunk at the time. Sal said he was talking about how you can't say sweetheart to women when you're out now. He said the guys all told him that when they went out to eat. Howard played a clip of Sal talking about the things you can't say to women now. He sounded pretty drunk in the clip. He was thanking everyone and saying he won't call you honey, sweetheart or beautiful anymore. He said he's a low life piece of shit. Gary said that was 5 minutes non stop. Robin said she wants to hear that full 5 minutes. Howard said Sal called his handler ''sweetheart'' the next day.
Howard asked if Ronnie and Mike are okay now. Ronnie said things are fine. Blitt said that Mike had a hard time processing the whole thing the next day. Howard asked Mike if things are okay. Mike said they are. He said that his fiancee called him and had their 7 month old on with her and Ronnie told her to wear her hottest fucking dress to the wedding.
Howard said it's annoying when a woman doesn't show her hotness. He said what a crew he's got.
Howard asked if JD is okay now. JD said he's fine. He said he was just feeling some emotions that day. Ronnie said it's good, he had his back. He said they were sitting at a table and Sal for 20 minutes sat there telling him that he had his back. He said he kept saying ''I've got your back.''
Howard said he couldn't have sat there with these idiots. He said it sounds like a nightmare. Robin said she doesn't get how Sal doesn't know that you don't put your fingers in food that you're sharing with people. Sal said he had no idea where he even was at that point. He said that was the least of the problems.
Howard said there you go, that was the dinner for Ronnie. He said people were drinking too much and crying. Gary said now that things have settled down it's good but it was tense there for a while. He said that he was worried or a while. Howard said someone took a ride with Gary and said he would not stop talking. Sal said this guy can talk your fucking head off. He said he was going on and on. He said he was calling him Babble Booey. He said he took a video of Gary talking and looped it and he kept going and going. Derek said that he had something to say about everything they saw on the road.
Howard said Blitt has a story about Gary too. Blitt said that Gary came over to their table out at dinner and he just took food off the plate. Gary said he admits he was wrong doing that. He said that he knew it was wrong as soon as he did it. Blitt said he was not offended but JD was. Ronnie said that's not what he said this morning.
Mike said he had some Muscle Milks and he gave one to Gary and he finished it in like 3 seconds. Gary said it was tiny.
JD said they were all fighting and Blitt went into the pool and came out saying he was all refreshed.
Howard answered a knock at the door and it was fake Tom Arnold who was talking about how Sal might be drinking too much if he needs an etiquette manager. He said he might have to stop drinking. Tom said he did it all and he knows. He asked if Howard fell off the wagon down there. Howard said he doesn't drink at all. Tom said Howard is strung out for sure. Howard said he is not. He let fake Tom go a short time later.
Wolfie said the guys who were doing security looked like they were special forces kind of guys. He said Ronnie was talking to them about their jobs. Ronnie asked how he knows that. Wolfie said he had a lav microphone on and he heard it all. Ronnie explained that the guy was from New York and he was just getting to know him. Howard asked if Wolfie thinks that Ronnie had a man crush on the guy. Wolfie said he does.
Howard said it sounds like Ronnie had his party even though it wasn't the best. He said the guys gave him a good send off.
Howard said it was good to see everyone down there. He said he has said that already. He said he was thinking that it was almost a nice experience there.
Blitt said that JD wanted to have a cake with gold on it. He said he had to taste the gold. JD said that the guy came out with the dessert tray and Blitt took a picture and said that was all his.
Howard answered a knock at the door and fake Mike Pearlman was there telling the same stories that real Mike told. He was adding more detail to the stories.
Howard read some feedback about Carrie Underwood. He played some of her performance of ''Mama I'm Coming Home.'' Howard said he loved seeing her do that. He said she looked good. He read more feedback about her appearance. He played some of her other performances too.
Howard said Anitta was another guest they had and people enjoyed her. He said that he enjoyed talking to her as well. He said that she had that Puzzy spray. He said he was talking to her after the show and she showed him her pocket book. He said she had a big vagina on it. He said that was interesting. Howard read some feedback about her appearance.
Howard said he thinks that Anitta dressed down for the appearance and JD may have been upset by that. JD said it would have been nice if she dressed up in something but she still looked good. He said short shorts would have been nice.
Howard said he didn't know that her tattoo was inside her asshole. He said that you have to spread your ass cheeks to do that. He said he's not sure why she would do that. Robin said she was trying to prove to her dad that he could get a tattoo. Howard said she did that in front of her dad. He said that's kind of weird. JD said he wonders how she shit after getting it done.
Howard read some feedback about the Papi G bit they played last week. Howard said he liked that phone call. He said people liked Pitbull, Alix Earle and Bon Jovi. He said Madison tweeted about the amazing energy Pitbull has. He said he really does. He said people were making fun of him dancing with Pitbull. He said that he has some tape of some people making fun of him. Howard asked who it was. JD didn't remember.
Howard played a clip from E! news where they were making fun of him dancing with Pitbull.
Howard said he's still trying to recover from Miami. He said that he's not sure who was making fun of him there. JD said that was Kit Hoover.
Howard said he didn't realize that they were hijacking Andy Cohen's guest when Jon Bon Jovi came on. He said he had to call Andy to say he didn't realize that. He said Andy said he's glad he called. He said he thinks he had some weird feeling about it. He said he didn't know what was going on. He said he was told that Andy had Jon on for the full half hour he was supposed to have him for. He said he thinks he may have been miffed a little bit.
Howard had some audio of Andy talking about how Jon was in with Howard but whatever. Howard said Andy was cool about it. He said he's a good dude. He said he didn't know Jon was supposed to be on with him. He said he did appreciate the call. He said he asked when he was going back to New York. He said Andy was only there for like a day. He said Andy didn't know why he was down there either. He said he felt the same way. Howard said he's not sure why they didn't have Mad Dog down there.
Gary said they were out of that game 40 seconds into it. Howard said Ross was there and sent him some clips. He said he told him to just go home. He said one of the announcers said that they were up by 20 and they were in a good position.
Howard said the Yankees are doing really poorly. He said he's not sure how they don't have killer teams there. He said it really is the capital of the United States. He said they should have great teams there. Gary and Howard spent some time talking about Aaron Rogers and Shailene Woodley too.
Robin brought up something about tennis and Howard said he has an aversion to tennis. He said he played back when he was younger. He said that he would go and play with some dudes who knew how to play and he gave up on it. He said he was all angry with it. Robin said it's the greatest game.
Howard played another clip of Andy Cohen talking about Jon Bon Jovi and how he wants there yet. Robin asked who calls Jon ''JBJ.'' Howard said Andy does. He played another clip where Andy was talking about the size of the studio they had there in Miami. He said it was like a closet. He also talked about how Howard said he was the one who started COVID. Howard said he did say he was patient zero.
Howard said you can't be a dick your whole life. He said it's not easy for him to be a human being. He said he felt like he had to talk to Andy about that whole thing.
Howard said he hates watching sports. He said he wants the Knicks to win but they're not going to. Howard and Gary got back into the discussion about the Knicks. They spent a little more time on that.
Howard said the fans liked Alix Earle. He said he liked her too. He read through some of the feedback about her. Howard said she posted some videos about getting ready for the show and a day in the life thing.
Howard said the big news from Miami was the guys fighting. Robin said she thought it was going to be a great reunion but they just fought. Howard said he thought some of that stuff was to get on the air but this was off the air. He said he doesn't know what was going on.
Howard said that some of the people who didn't come down got offended that they didn't get to come. He said he's not sure what they based that on. He said he's not sure what the deal is there. He said he knew he had to go but he didn't know who was coming down. He said he just had to be there. He said he was going to just go there himself and not burden anyone else. He said he would go back down there to do an interview or something. He said he's thinking about going back to the studio in the city a couple of times a week. He said he got a good energy off of it. He said that he liked seeing guests face to face. He said he might do that.
Howard said he was thinking about going back to L.A. to do some shows too. He said he'll do it. He said book a couple of guests out in L.A. and use that studio. He said one of his kids lives out there so he can see her too. Robin said you can kill two birds with one stone. Howard said don't say that around his wife. He said she hates that saying.
Robin said at last Sal didn't do the beach thing. Howard said he actually did. He said he had birds all over his ass. He said that people told him it was unsanitary to go to the nude beach. He had a picture of Sal that he showed Robin. Howard said look at his ass.
Howard asked Sal if it felt weird doing that stuff. Sal said it was fun. He said it did feel weird. He said he'll do it out in L.A. if they go out there.
Howard had Richard come on and talked to him about his kids. He had heard that his son doesn't listen to his parents. Richard said he is pretty independent. Howard said that they have to give him boundaries. Richard said they do. He said that he gets into dad mode. He said he knows how to be a dad. He said he learned a lot from his dad.
Richard told a story about trying to make his own firecracker out of gun powder once. He said that he ended up burning a hole in the carpet and his mother just said they'll put a chair over it.
Howard said he heard his kids are wild. Richard said they are and he loves it. Howard said they have to behave at school. Richard said their older kid is in school and he loves it. He said he's doing really well. Howard asked if the kids look like him. Richard said their youngest looks exactly like him. Howard said it's a good thing he's a good looking man.
Howard asked if Richard has been drinking a lot because his skin is very red. Richard said he's been out in the sun a lot. He said he hasn't put anything on to protect himself. He said he got burned.
Howard said Richard is going to regret it when they start cutting shit off of him that's cancerous. He said he's had a few of those things taken off. Richard said he has too. Howard said he has been using sun protection on his lips. He said he has a special thing he puts on.
Howard said Richard looks like King Charles. Sal added that he looks like him after a fire. Howard said Richard should wear a cap at least. Richard said he does. He said that he should get a big sun hat. Howard said he should. He said that he has one. He said his wife tells him to tuck the chin strap in. He said he doesn't care. He said he looks goofy with it on but Beth looks great with the same thing. He said he doesn't care anymore though. He said he's given up on his looks. Sal said he thought he looked really good. Howard said stop. He said he knows he's not good looking. Sal said he thinks he looks good because he stayed away from them for so long. Howard said he has an old man neck. He said he does have a full head of hair though. He said that's really nice. He said imagine if he lost all of his hair. Richard said he'd look like him. Howard said he has seen guys who look like him with no hair. He said he feels like there's something going on with his skull too so he's glad he has hair. He said he thanks God every day for that. He said he's not sure if there is a god but he's thanking him anyway.
Howard said he would look like Nosferatu if he didn't have any hair. Robin said that this movie Renfield is really good. She said Nicolas Cage is really good in it. Howard said he should have come in to promote it. He said he would have loved that. Richard said that movie looks like so much fun. Howard asked if it was funny or serious. Robin said it was a little funny. Howard said he doesn't like that. Robin said Nic is so good in it. Howard said he wants a real horror movie. Richard said he's with him most of the way with that but there are some that are done well like the Evil Dead movies. Howard asked what happened to Sam Raimi. Richard told him what he's been up to. Howard said he was going to write a movie with him years ago. He said he was a big fan of his. He said he had a meeting with him and he was going to write a script but it was a lot of work so he didn't do that. He said he wanted to sit and write with him and that's not fun. He said just ask Fred.
Richard said went back to the Evil Dead stuff and Howard said read the room and realize they're off of that subject.
Howard said that Chris Wilding had an issue with a kid screaming in the room next to his in the hotel. He said this was Chris taping the screaming kid. He said this is through the wall. He said you can hear that so clearly. He said it must have been adjoining door. He said this went on day and night. He played the clip and it was really loud. Howard said it sounded like it was kids inside the walls.
Howard said that's a lot to put up with. He said he's thinking there's a movie there. Richard said there is a movie where people are in the walls.
Howard asked Chris how bad that was. Chris said he has issues in his apartment and he was hoping for some quiet down there. He said this is what he ended up with. Howard said he made sure to ask for a room that was quiet. He said they had to get a room above and below him because he didn't want to hear a sound. He said that's what he demanded. He said it was dead quiet where he was.
Chris said he asked for a non adjoining room and they gave him one so that was through the wall.
Howard asked if he got any dudes down there. Chris said that he did have a very special date. He said the guy was gorgeous. He told Howard about some of the other guys he was in contact with too.
Howard asked what this guy looked like. Chris explained and said the guy kept calling him Papi. Howard asked how long it was until he got him in his room. Chris said they're working on the package so he doesn't want to ruin the surprise. Howard asked if he blew the guy. Chris said there was a lot of grinding going on and things like that. He said it was a lot of heavy make outs. Howard said why not stroke his cock. Chris said he did some of that. He said the guy had a growth in his pants. He said that he had a tumor or something giant in those pants. He said it was a great day. Howard went through more of that story with Chris.
Howard took a call from a woman who asked what is with Richard not disciplining the kids. Richard said they do. The woman's grand kid was screaming behind her. She told them to quiet down. Howard said if he said a word when his mom was on the phone he'd get yelled at. He said she'd rip his head off.
Howard said he wants to talk to that kid. The caller was trying to tell her grand son that she was on the phone and the kid just kept talking. Howard said this call isn't making her look so good. He said she's good at telling Richard what to do. Howard let the caller, Shelly, talk to her grand son and stayed quiet. Shelly said that you have to have the kids respect you and disciplining them is love too.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked if they hear the fighting and drinking stuff does he go home and ask what the fuck is wrong with them. He asked if he would be friends with them. Howard said not at all. He said that these are his guys though. He said he doesn't hang out with them. Howard said he does love his guys.
The caller asked how he made out going out down in Miami. Howard said he's loosening up so he's doing okay. He said he was fine in the hotel. He said he didn't even wear a mask there in the hotel. He said he's still nervous though. He said he does try to wrap things up quickly. He said they went out to eat and they asked to order right away. He said he wanted to get in and get out.
Howard said he was surprised how much Miami has changed since he went to visit his grandfather down there. He said it's a very young area there. He said it's very beautiful down there. He said he doesn't like noise and fun so it's not for him but if you like that then go there.
Richard said that Howard sent him to the Super Bowl down there a couple of years ago. He said it was nice down there. Howard had some audio of him thanking him for that. Howard did a live commercial read and ended the show. They were done around 10:30am.
Robin said it's not the guns, it's the people who run around with them and what they do with them.
Howard said Gordon Lightfoot was a musician who died about a week ago. He said that they didn't get to it before because they were busy with the staff fights. Howard said he got a lot of feedback about the fighting. He said that Ronnie was so upset with Mike Pearlman over a simple statement he made. He said he can't believe that was his security guy for many years. He said he lost his temper so easily.
Howard read through some of the feedback about the Ronnie fight. He said he enjoyed hearing about all of that. He said Ronnie just went off about that shirt thing. He played the clip he played yesterday where Ronnie threw his drink at Mike. Howard laughed as he was listening to that.
Howard read more of the feedback he got about the Ronnie thing. Howard read some things about Sal too. He said that Sal asked one of the staffers to be his creep monitor for the night out at dinner. He said it turns out it was a 25 year old woman. He said this is Sal asking her to be his anti-creep monitor. He played a clip of Sal talking to her and telling the guys about what he asked her to do. The guys were telling Sal to stop with that. Howard said this woman is not his friend. Sal said she is. Howard said no she's not.
Howard said Sal didn't hire anyone. He said if he wants an etiquette manager or whatever then he'll hire some big dude for him. He said he's supposed to be a mentor for this woman. He asked how old he is. Sal said he's 53. Howard said he's asking a 25 year old to watch over him. He said he's an idiot. Sal said have a nice show.
Howard asked why he got this woman to do that. Sal said that she's a friend. He said he wouldn't hire Jon Blitt to do that. Howard said how about the security guard who was there. Sal said he was Ronnie's buddy.
Howard said if you're 53 and you can't control yourself then that's a problem. Sal said he can control himself except this one day a year. Howard said he had men all over that room that he could have gotten to help him. Sal said thank you and signed off.
Howard said this is Sal's Bing Crosby rant. He played the clip and Sal was going off on people who want to lock you up for calling a woman ''darling.'' His etiquette manager told him to stop and he took it all back.
Howard read more feedback about Ronnie and Pearlman's fight. People were split on the pineapple drink thing. Howard said he's on Mike's side on that. He said it is kind of lame to have your drink in a pineapple. Howard played some clips of Ronnie freaking out and arguing with Mike.
Howard said they're both going at it. He said it's not one guy or the other. He asked why Sal says stuff about being from the Bing Crosby days. He said he's only 53. He said his dad was from those days. Sal said he doesn't even remember saying that. He said he can't even stand Bing Crosby. He said he was so annoying. He said he had the worst Christmas music and he was terrible. Howard said the guy was born in 1903. Sal said that's the alcohol. He said that he gets all messed up from that.
Howard said one of the guys said that Ronnie has a crush on Mike Pearlman. He said he was into him when he got hypnotized. Ronnie said he knew that would come up.
Howard said they have cursing all over the web site too. Ronnie said it's all her deal. He said he has nothing to do with it. Howard asked why she has ''dickhole'' all over the web site. Ronnie said he has not even seen the site. Howard said if his wife made that web site he would pull her aside and ask her what she's doing. He said she has this cursing all over it. He said he's not trying to bust balls here. Ronnie laughed. He said that's her deal.
Howard asked why his nickname is dickhole. Ronnie said he doesn't know. He said that's her deal.
Howard asked if anyone else has been on the site. JD said he was on there. Jason said he and JD were going through it all. He said they were taking notes. Ronnie said that's terrific. He said he doesn't even give a shit. Howard asked what it means that he has to dress to impress at the cocktail party. Ronnie said that's the wedding. He said come in your underwear if you want. Howard said this is what happens when he asks Ronnie a question.
Howard asked JD what he's going to wear. JD said he's not sure but he thought that cocktail attire means that you can just wear a shirt and jeans maybe. He said he thinks it might mean a suit or something. Robin said that's the wrong thing to tell these guys.
Howard said he thinks there's a spelling mistake on the site. He said it's something about drinks and ''bits'' being there. He said he thinks it's supposed to be bites.
Chris said if you go to the site they tell you to figure out how to have fun yourself out in Vegas. Howard said if they say there's things to do they should have things to do. Ronnie said they're talking to the wrong person. He said he can get her on and they can talk to her about it.
Howard said he gets so touchy. Ronnie said that's her thing. Jason said it's his thing too. Ronnie said that's her day. Jason said that's so fucked up. Ronnie said it's not fucked up. He said she's in charge of that part of it.
Howard said on the site it says ''dickhole tavern.'' He asked what that means. Ronnie said he has no idea. JD said Stephanie asked them to hashtag the pictures with #DickholeTavern or #TheMunds.
Ronnie got pissed when he saw Mike Pearlman get on. Mike said he noticed that he has one picture of himself and Kurt Busch but no pictures of Howard. Howard said that's out of respect. He said that Ronnie knows he wouldn't like that. Ronnie said he wouldn't do that.
Howard said the fans were saying this whole thing with Mike and Ronnie getting mad was sexual tension. Mike said they never talk about that. Howard played a clip from that day when Ronnie talked about how hot Mike Pearlman is when he was under hypnosis and he was acting like he was a woman.
Howard said these guys are actually admiring of each other. He asked if Mike is going to the wedding. Mike said he is. He said this reminds him of when Howard talks about his dad snapping at him when he was growing up. He said it's like he's waiting for that one thing to set him off.
Howard said Mike knows how to press Ronnie's buttons. Mike said he knows. Jason said it's the stupidest questions too. He said it's like asking if he wore the same shirt 3 days in a row. Howard said you can't snap over that kind of thing. He said you can't do that.
Howard said Blitt said he asked Ronnie if he would fuck mike if he wasn't hypnotized and he said yes. Blitt said he said that 100 percent. He said they played it on air. He said it was before he was hypnotized. Ronnie told him to stop being a moron.
Howard said he doesn't want to re-live the whole thing over again. Ronnie said sure he doesn't. He said he was talking about Gordon Lightfoot and then he's on this. Howard said he may not give a shit about Gordon Lightfoot. He said Chris is Canadian so he can sing some of his songs. Chris sang some of his stuff. Howard said he had some hit songs. He said he's going to give him a nice send off.
Howard said wrapping up the rest of the weekend one of the segments was JD crying over Ronnie. He said it made listeners emotional too. He read some of the feedback about that. The fans were talking about how upset Ronnie might be seeing his replacement. Howard said the fans wrote in about him seeing the guys after not seeing them in person for 3 years. He said that they got emotional. Howard said some people said it was like the ending of The Bodyguard. He played a clip from the movie.
Howard said here's Ronnie and Howard in Miami like The Bodyguard. Howard played a bit the guys put together using music from the movie and playing clips from the studio that day.
Chris said it was kind of mind blowing that they saw Howard. Howard said he did enjoy seeing the guys. He said it was good. He said that he's glad that he didn't have to see Benjy. He said it was good to see everyone. He said he kind of feels like they should get back into the studio. He said it was nice to be around people. He said he won't be a wise ass and say it wasn't good.
Jason said they spent the entire trip in one studio together. He said it was fun. He said the energy level was awesome. Howard said he gets that. He said he's right. He said it's good to have everyone around to feed off of each other. Chris said you can't throw drinks at each other on Zoom. Ronnie said you can't run across to another bar to cry either.
Howard said he was thinking about Chris and Sal kissing. Ronnie said that reminded him of Fred's bachelor party when he kissed Gay Rich. Howard said it was a weird thing. Sal said it was just a friendly kiss. He said he made him feel good. Howard said he likes him too but he's not going to make out with him. Sal said he's not sure how it evolved into making out. He said it was an eighth of a second peck. He said it was nothing. Jason said it wasn't a full on make out thing but no one was asking for it. He said it was just something Sal wanted to do. Howard said if you're straight and you kiss a dude what's going no there. Sal said Chris is a good dude and he made him feel good.
Howard asked if Sal would fondle Chris' dick if he asked him to do that. Sal said he would not. He said that he might tickle his balls.
Howard said the thing is that it was good to get together down there. Robin said that they used to have things start when the guys were together. She said Miami brought all of that back. Howard said the stuff at the office is the kind of stuff that they used to have on the air. He said they miss that kind of stuff.
Howard saw a picture of Sal and Chris kissing. He said that does look pretty gay. He said that's really funny. Blitt said he was so close to getting him to put his dick on his forehead. Howard said that would be a great wedding web site photo.
Howard answered a knock at the door and fake Tom Arnold was on talking about how serious this topic is. He said Sal has a drinking problem and he's inching toward the butt fuck zone. He said he's saying that Sal is addicted to alcohol and he's about to be addicted to his buddy's cum. Howard thanked fake Tom for that and closed the fake door on him.
Howard said Ronnie used to call Wolfie a weirdo and he never got that. He said the other guys were saying that he's a weirdo too. He said he likes the guy but what's going on with him. He said everyone seems to think he's strange. He said someone says they think that he has Aspergers. Wolfie asked that person to step up. Jason said he thinks it was Gary. Gary said people were saying that to him that night. He said he didn't say it. He said he doesn't think that's true. He said that he can't remember who said it to him.
Howard asked Ronnie why he thinks he's so weird. Ronnie said he lurks in the corner and he has that look on his face. Wolfie said you mean he was doing his job. Ronnie said he's just weird. He said he'd disappear into his room and stuff.
Howard said a lot of people agreed with Ronnie on the Wolfie thing. He asked if he's invited to the wedding. Ronnie said he is. Howard said he thought he might kill the vibe.
Chris said he thinks Wolfie is weird but that's the thing that makes him funny. He said Wolfie is kind of tall and imposing. He said that you don't know that unless you see him in person. He said he does hide so he isn't so imposing.
Howard said he heard that he has a bird feeder and he doesn't like some birds so he has his neighbors watch to make sure they don't get in there. Wolfie said he is very particular about the birds in his yard. Howard asked what he likes. Wolfie said he like tree swallows and hates house sparrows. He said they're not supposed to be in this country and he despises them. Chris said that is kind of weird.
Jason said Wolfie has a bird house that has a camera in it and it's run off of solar. He said it's like a full time job. Ronnie asked how it keeps the birds out. Jason said he has scarecrows. Wolfie said he'll clear out the nests from the birds. Howard said he feels bad for them.
Howard and the guys spent a few minutes talking about how bad the Knicks are lately. Howard said he can't stand to watch anymore. He said he's not going to watch the next game. Gary asked if he'll watch if they win again. Howard said he's going to watch.
Howard asked Mike if Ronnie did anything right in Miami. Mike said that he had some cook Mike's on and he did have some nice clothes. He said he wore black socks with his Mike's though. He said that's not right. He said he should be wearing no shows or something. Howard said he wears those but they don't stay on right. Mike said they have some that have a rubber thing on the back so they stay in place.
Mike and Ronnie were getting into it again a little bit. Ronnie asked Wolfie a question to get out of that.
Chris said that he thought JD was going to be part of the wedding party but he's not. Jason said they're keeping it very small so there's hardly a wedding party.
Howard answered a knock at the door and it was fake Trump talking about the Wolfie bird thing and how they're illegal immigrants. He said they're going to have a sparrow-van coming in. He said they're going to send them all to liberal California.
Howard said he's glad he's there. H said his deposition was wild. He said Trump said that E. Jean Caroll wasn't his type. He said he's not sure that's a good excuse for a rape trial. Trump said he's only into 10s. He said he doesn't get into that good personality shit.
Howard said Trump also said that famous men have been grabbing women for a million years. He said that's not possible. Trump said it's been happening since the beginning of time. He said Howard knows that. Howard said he doesn't know that. Howard and Trump went back and forth with that for a couple of minutes.
Howard said Trump isn't going to testify at this trial. Trump said he's not even going to be there. He said it's not fair to him. Howard said he should testify. Trump said he can't go to a trial full of ugly broads in the jury. He said he can't look at the lawyer there. He said that's not his type. Howard asked if he thinks that Wolfie has Aspergers. Trump said that he thinks JD has cheeseburgers. He said that Wolfie is the full on R-word. He said that he's on the struggle bus. He said he's not sure why he's not wearing a helmet. Howard said he's not politically correct at all. Howard spent a little more time with fake Trump and then let him go.
Howard took a call from his buddy Ralph who said he has to say that this is the greatest. He said he's glad he didn't invite him to Florida because he would have been a mess down there too. He said that Sal can't even say Bing Crosby. He said he called him Bin Cronsby. Howard said there's a lot in those clips. Ralph said he doesn't get how Ronnie and Mike go back and forth like that. He said he's not sure why he'd invite him to the wedding. He said you know something is going to happen. Ronnie said he feels bad not inviting him. He said he felt bad when they were throwing him out of the dinner. The guys said it was so weird.
Ronnie said they got to dinner and they started to escalate again. He said then Chris ran out and there was too much shit going on so they told Mike to go home.
Jason said when they showed up at the restaurant they feared that something horrible was going to happen. He said they were on a rooftop too and they were afraid something was going to happen up there. Ronnie said stop it.
Gary said they were at opposite ends of the table and they were yelling fuck yous at each other. He said they had to defuse the whole thing. He said they were going to send Mike home to calm things down. He said Ronnie went ballistic when he heard they did that. He said that's what happened.
Howard said it's good they had someone there to defuse things. Ronnie said he just threw a plastic cup at the guy. He said it was nothing. Chris said he took the brunt of that throw. Howard said that he did lay hands on him. Ronnie said he did not. He said he didn't grab him by the collar like Jason said. He said it was the middle of his shirt.
Howard asked JD if he was nervous when he grabbed his shirt. JD said they had seen this all day long. He said this was going on the whole day so it wasn't anything new. Howard asked what they were fighting about. JD said Pearlman was going through the old pictures of Ronnie and set him off about his different hair styles. Howard asked if that set him off. Ronnie said they went through this before. He said he isn't sure what he was trying to prove. He said he admitted to the hair thing years ago. He said he's just trying to get under his skin. He said that's what he does.
Gary said that Mike pokes at Ronnie every day so don't be surprised when he pokes back.
Howard let Ralph go and reviewed the Miami stuff again. He said it became a shit show down there. Howard said wild stuff happened. He said that everyone thinks Wolfie is weird. Howard said he's not sure what his last name is or anything but he doesn't think he's weird. Wolfie asked if that's true. Howard said he really doesn't know. Wolfie said his last name is Wolfe. Howard said his name is Robert Wolfe then. Wolfie said that's right. Howard said he's been on the show since 2008 and he has no idea what his name is.
Howard said he is a Wolfie fan. He said he said from the beginning that he wanted him on the show. He said he believes he was right. Chris said he's responsible for some of the best convention coverage ever.
Howard asked what Wolfie did for a living. Wolfie said he worked for hotels and airlines. He said he worked with corporate clients. Howard said he's doing a good job there. He said he likes the guy. He said the guys think he's weird but that's fine if he's weird. Robin said they like weird.
Wolfie said he loved that down in Miami Ronnie was yelling out cunt and stuff like that and then he was yelling out Howard's name. Ronnie said he never said Howard's name. Wolfie said he has tape. He said be careful what he claims.
JD said they had a drinking game and cunt was the secret word so that's why they were yelling it out. Howard asked where the tape is. Wolfie said he can get it in like 2 seconds.
JD said Ronnie saw the drum kit with CU on it for Carrie Underwood and Ronnie was talking about how he'd put NT after it. Howard and the guys were doing their impression of Ronnie talking about that.
Wolfie said he sent the tape to the guys so they should have it now. Howard said he has to hear this clip. Ronnie said this was at night and there were no kids around. Howard said he yelled out cunt at Bubba's wedding that time when there were kids there. Ronnie said this is different.
Howard said here's the tape. He played it and Ronnie was yelling cunt and yelling out ''Howard!'' too. He was saying Howard's name along with that so Wolfie was right. Howard asked what the fuck he was doing.
Howard said their etiquette advisor told the guys that they had to behave down there and this is how they act. Howard said he's too old to be yelling out ''cunt'' in the middle of the street. He said he has to give him one thing though. He said he has the energy of a teenager. He said he's not sure where he gets that energy. JD said he was ready to go to the strip club and stay up the whole tonight. He said there was no way he could do that himself. Mike said there's nothing that slows him down.
Robin said that's the best tape Ronnie has ever made. She said out of all of them that's the best. Howard played it again. Chris said Ronnie is like a pervy town crier.
Howard said that Ronnie was denying that he yelled out Howard Stern. Ronnie said he was drunk and didn't remember. Howard recapped all of that again. Ronnie said Sal disappeared there. Mike said Sal took advantage of that trip every bit he could. Howard said Sal did great down there. Sal said he was busy working and didn't just disappear. Howard said he didn't mean for this to go 2 hours.
Howard said Ed Sheeran is going to be on tomorrow. He said he has a song on his new album that's called Eyes Closed or something. He said it's really good. He said it's really heavy too. One of the guys said that the song was Salt Water. Howard said the Eyes Closed is the one that was really emotional. He said Salt Water is really good though. He said he's coming in to play some songs.
Howard did a live commercial read and went to break.
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Howard came back and said they know those guys the Goo Goo Dolls. He said Ed Sheeran will be in tomorrow. He said he'll be promoting this new documentary he's in. He said he has this new album out (- (Subtract))too. He played the song that he was talking about earlier. He said it's a number one single in the UK already. He said that his friend died and he wrote this song about him. He said he was working on this album for 10 years and he had all of this material that he threw out to start over again. He said this guy Jamal died and it was his best friend.
Howard said he wanted to talk about Gordon Lightfoot. He said most of the staff don't know who he is. He said he doesn't think he's in the rock and roll hall of fame. He said he died at the age of 84 last week. Robin said she heard he died and she had forgotten all about him. She said you don't hear his songs.
Howard said he played a 12 string guitar. He played a couple of his big songs. He had ''The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald'' and ''Sundown.'' He said they were pretty big. Howard said he read a note about how the girlfriend he was writing about may have been Kathy Smith who was involved in the whole John Belushi thing. He said that's just a rumor so don't quote him on that.
Howard said maybe he should be in the hall of fame. He said he did have some hits. He played ''If You Could Read My Mind'' and some others.
Howard said he had 4 top 10 songs. He read some details about his career and who covered his songs. He said Billy Joel paid tribute to him the other night. He had some audio of that. He had Billy singing ''If You Could Read My Mind.''
Howard said rest in peace Gordon Lightfoot. He said there was a lot going on in that Edmund Fitzgerald song. Gary said he thinks that he had just read an article about the wreck and wrote the song about it. He said it basically sounds like he wrote the song reading the newspaper. Howard said this is him just reading the newspaper. He played the song.
Howard said it's not easy to write a song about Lake Gitchegumee. Fred said they recorded that song in one take and that was the first one they did. He said they tried to do it more than once and they went with the first take. He said it's all very spontaneous and it was just the one time. Howard said nice job. He said he was a talented man. Howard said Fred is a valuable encyclopedia too. He said he knows his music.
Howard said Fred went to a top 40 station called WAQY. He said he was kind of shocked he went there. Fred said they changed to album rock shortly after he went there. Howard said Fred always got the nighttime shift. He said he had that silky smooth delivery.
Howard said don't get him started with the bangs. He said Beth went to a hair salon and they gave her the bangs and she didn't like it. He said he did but Beth said they're in the way all the time. He said she's going to grow it out. He said he kept his mouth shut after that. He said he thinks she looks good all the time. He said there's something there that set her off. He said he knows what to do.
Mariann said that he has to go home and tell her that she looks good and they have to bang at bang o'clock. Howard said they got the bang joke. He hung up on her.
Howard said that girl watches Instagram like it's the Torah. He did an impression of Mariann talking about all of that and repeating her bang joke.
Howard said Jerry Springer died. He said a lot of people wrote in about his rock and roll hall of fame rant. He said he didn't mean to pick on Kate Bush but he was trying to explain that there are so many fantastic people out there who should be in the hall of fame. He said he pointed out a lot of bands who belong in there. He read through some of that feedback. He ended up talking about Pete Frampton and how he belongs in the hall of fame. He talked about how legendary he is. He had Fred play some of his ''30 Days in the Hole'' and talked about how great the guy was as a guitar player.
Howard read some of the feedback he got about Kate Bush. Howard said he's not saying she's not a talent but there are a lot of people who should be in the hall of fame before she is.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he's going to cry talking to him. He said he loves the show. He said that he can't believe this is happening. He asked Fred not to play the crying clip. Fred did it a few seconds later.
The caller asked if Howard is going to Ronnie's wedding. Howard said he's not sure yet. The caller, Mario, said that he knows Bubba is going. He said he has his flight booked already. Howard said he would love to see Bubba. He said he's not sure if he's going. Mario said he has to go. He said maybe he will run into him and get to say hello. Howard said that there are people like Robin and Gary who are saying that he might get inducted into the rock and roll hall of fame some day. He said he's not sure who he should get to induct him. Mario said he would do it. Howard said he'd have to get Beetlejuice to do it. Robin said he'd have to get Bruce Springsteen to do it. Howard said that would be great but Beetlejuice is the right choice.
Mario asked Howard who runs his tapes team because they never play what he requests. Howard said he demands that they get up there on those clips. He said that Gary did the weight loss challenge and he gave himself an enema. Howard said you never know but maybe they'll play that some day.
Howard said Jerry said he didn't even watch his own show. He said the show debuted in 1991 and he didn't watch much of it. He said he's sure it will live on in infamy. He said he died from Pancreatic cancer. Robin said it was a very short period of time from when they found it until he died.
Howard said Maria Menounos had pancreatic cancer and they caught it early so they were able to treat her. He said she got a body scan and discovered it. He said that it takes you pretty fast. He said it's a real lethal form of cancer. He said it has to be kind of painful to have too. Robin said at stage 4 it causes lots of difficulties. Fred played Beetlejuice trying to pronounce Maria Menounos. Howard was correcting the clips and Fred kept playing it over and over.
Howard said he thinks that you should be able to take a cocktail of some sort that can put you to sleep when you have pain. He said there are religious freaks in this country who don't think that should be allowed. Howard said the rest of us may want to check out early. He said his dad was 99 years old and he was acting really weird. He said that they explained to him that his father had prostate cancer. He said they didn't pick up on it because it had spread to his bones and body and that's what was killing him. He said he was acting wacky because he couldn't verbalize his pain. He said he wasn't able to articulate it and that made him sad. He said his dad was in a lot of pain. He said he was in the hospital dying and he kept raising his arms like he was in pain. Robin said it's unrelenting pain and you're not living anymore. She said all you're doing is suffering. Howard said in this country we can't change the laws because of the religious types. Robin said there are laws on the books that have all of these rules. Howard said he thinks in Sweden you can get a drink that will put you down. Robin said she thinks in a couple of states here have those laws that do allow it. She said she thinks Oregon has that.
Howard said Jerry Springer had a big impact on TV. He said people were allowed to beat each other up on the show. He said it was wild.
Howard played a montage from the Jerry Springer show with wild moments. Howard went over some of the episode names that had some wild descriptions.
Howard said the show was huge and overtook Oprah. He said that Jerry was on the show and talked about how the show progressed. He played a clip from 2014 when Jerry was on the show.
Howard said Jerry's life was pretty wild. He said he was born in a subway station in England. He read a bunch of things that had gone on in his life and talked about how wild some of that stuff was. He said that he paid a hooker with a check and got arrested over that. He said that was a defining moment in his life. He said that ruined his political career. He played a clip from 1997 when Jerry was on the show and explained the prostitute check thing.
Howard said he was quite taken with that story and you can see why. He said that he doesn't think that he'd pay a hooker with a check. He said it's almost like he wanted to get caught.
Howard said Jerry admitted to the whole hooker thing and still got elected. He said he made the whole story part of his campaign. He played some audio from a commercial that Jerry made for his run for governor.
Howard said pussy can really get you into trouble. He said people question your judgment when you do something like that. He said he lost the race thanks to that.
Howard said in 1998 Kendra Jade came on the show and claimed that Jerry gave her oral sex the day before she was on his show. Howard played a clip of Kendra Jade talking about that on their show. She had done a 80 guy gang bang the day before and Jerry still went down on her the day after she did that. Howard said you don't hear tributes like they do there on this show. Howard said poor Jerry. He said he loved women and he loved going down on them. He said even if they had 80 guys the day before. Howard said even Kendra was shocked by that.
Howard answered a knock at the door and it was fake Trump again. trump said he admired Jerry until he heard that 80 guys story. He said that he wouldn't do that. He said that he'd need multiple hands to grab her by the pussy.
Howard said he saw an interview Donald did with a woman and they revealed that he didn't use a condom with her. He said he thought he was a germaphobe. Fake Trump said that she had a velvet pussy. Howard said he's surprised that he never married that one. Trump said people have weird feelings about Playmates. Howard let him go a short time later.
Howard said in 2011 Jerry was on the show and told him about how he got into politics. He played a clip of Jerry talking about all of that.
Howard said Jerry's show ran for over 3000 episodes. He said he hosted America's Got Talent for a while. He said he was part of the Price is Right too. He said he was on the Masked Singer. He said he doesn't remember him being on the Price is Right. Howard went through some of the other things Jerry was part of.
Howard said jerry called into the show in 2002 and he said he was doing the final thought thing to get into heaven and Robin told him he probably won't get into heaven. Howard played a clip from that show from 2002. Howard said Robin liked that final thought segment.
Howard said rest in peace Jerry. He said he was always a nice guy and came on the show. He said hopefully somewhere he's in heaven with angels chanting ''Jerry!'' He played a clip of his audience doing that.
Robin said that she saw an interview where Geraldo and Steve Wilco were talking about how they were still good friends and they went to lunch with them shortly before he died and that was his way of saying goodbye without telling them that he was sick. Howard said he's not sure what he would do if he was sick. He said maybe you just do go out to lunch and don't tell them. He said you just don't burden them with that. Robin said they were talking about how they just talk about what's going on in their lives and this was more of a memory lane kind of talk. Then Jerry died. Howard said he's going to call Robin and do that when he's on his way out. Howard said they should do that. He said he'll call Robin and Gary and maybe some others. Howard said he's not calling Benjy. He said he already knows that.
Howard did a live commercial read and went to break after that.
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Howard came back and said that Meghan Markle is a good 7. He said he thinks she is really attractive. Robin said she's more than a 7. Howard said Adele lost a lot if weight too.
Howard said the guys were saying that JD disagrees with Ronnie about Meghan. They spent a minute on that.
Robin said there are more than a few states here in this country that allow assisted suicide. She ran down a list.
Howard said he was watching this David Bowie documentary on HBO and it wasn't that good. He said he was not happy with it. He said they would show you concert footage from Bowie and they would put effects on it. He said it was really bad. He said he should produce this stuff. He said they made it psychedelic and you just want to see Bowie perform. He said he couldn't get into it.
Howard said he was never able to do a serious interview with Bowie. He said he had him on the birthday show but he didn't want to do an interview. He said he had so many questions for him.
Howard said he was thinking about Pete Townshend too. He said he wanted to interview him. He asked Gary to get on that again to get him to talk to him. He said he was thinking about how many songs that guy has written and it's insane. He said he's written so many great songs. He said that guy did it on his own too. He said he thinks he did it all without any collaboration. The guys played The Who and Howard said it's really amazing how many songs that guy wrote. He said he would love to do a tribute to him on the show. He said just listen to this. The guys were playing their big hits.
Howard said imagine that they talk over these masterpieces in radio. He said they talk up songs and talk over the music. He said that's so ridiculous. He did his top 40 voice and talked over some of The Who's great songs. Howard said radio came up with this arrogant thing. He asked what kind of profession he got himself into. Howard said imagine someone giving a traffic report over The Godfather.
Howard said the amount of songs that Pete wrote is amazing. The guys were still playing song after song that The Who put out. Then Fred played a Godfather clip and Howard talked it up like a song on radio.
Howard said he likes when the DJ tries to incorporate the title of the song in his rap. He was doing his impression of what that would sound like.
Howard said Imus had an engineer that he would point at and he'd let the engineer know when he wanted that first note to come in. He said he'd get all charged up and then point at the guy.
Howard said the best was that Broadway Bill Lee guy. He played some of his stuff. He said what a business this is. Robin wondered how much she could listen to this.
Howard said this stuff is crazy. Howard said he heard all of that and still got into the business. He said what a moronic business he chose. He said you have to be almost insane to want to get into it. He said he was.
Howard kept going with the DJ impression talking up the great Who songs and ruining the start of each one.
Howard asked what the fuck they're doing. He said it's a nutty business. He said Pete Townshend has to be racking his brain about why they do that. He kept going with his impression of the DJ.
Howard said he really would like to talk to Pete. He said Gary has to get on that. He said just listen to those songs. He said he has been talking over them his whole life. Robin wondered if Pete would write a song to give the DJ time to talk.
Howard said he worked with some real low lives in his career. He said he worked with some real uneducated boobs. He said it's some business they're in. He let out a belch and Robin wondered what that was.
Howard said he thought this was a goof. He said he put out the song ''Metamucil Man''. He played it for Robin. He said this is great. He said that rock bands don't like to sell out but he's wiling to sell out his song. He said he'll take a hit song any way he can get it. He said this is crazy but this is a legit thing. He said The Rolling Stones wrote a Rice Krispies commercial in the 1960s. He said he feels we should have been more aware of that. He said this is a legitimate thing. He played the commercial that they did back then. Howard said that's a real thing. He said it was reportedly written by Brian Jones. He said imagine the Rolling Stones did that. Robin said she never would have dreamed that.
Howard said Brian Johnson from AC/DC did a Hoover vacuums commercial. He said he told them that on the show one time. He said he told the that he had done that and he thought he was joking. Howard played a clip of Brian telling the story about the Hoover commercial thing.
Howard said this is Brian doing a Hoover commercial. He played the clip where Brian was singing this rock song about Hoover vacuums. Howard said that was a full song. He said back in the day they had long commercials. He said it's great.
Howard said he thought this was a joke too but it's not. He said he loved the band Cream and they recorded a song for Falstaff Beer in 1967. He said this is that commercial. He played that commercial and said that's crazy.
Howard said he's not sure they needed the money at that time. Robin said that they had already made their mark in the industry.
Howard answered a knock at the door and it was fake Bob Dylan who had a song for a tampon to the tune of ''Like a Rolling Stone.'' Howard closed the door on fake bob but he didn't hear it and kept going. Howard had to close it again so he got the hint to stop.
Howard played another commercial for Folgers that Paul Stanley did. Howard said his Metamucil Man isn't so crazy now that he thinks about it. He played the song again and said that he's like the Rolling Stones.
Howard said he's working on another song today called Peloton Girls that they might be interested in. He said that should be a big hit. He said one of these companies will pick up on it.
Howard said he's going to end the show. He said Ed Sheeran will be on tomorrow. He said a lot has gone on since they last saw him. He ended the show around 10:10am.
Howard said they have a lot to cover this morning. He said Ed Sheeran has a number 1 album and he'll be on this morning. He said he's on top of the world. He said he was watching his documentary and it's very good. He said Ed says he doesn't care if people buy his album but he really does care. He said the worst fear for any artist is for people not to buy it. He said he's sure he's on cloud noine right now. Robin said an artist must grow from within.
Howard said he's waiting for Donald Trump to come on. He said he should be there any second. Robin said he did lose his case yesterday. Howard said he did a pre-interview and he's very upset.
Howard answered the knock on the fake door and said he's going to make him wait. He didn't answer the door right away. when he did open the door fake Trump was pissed. Howard said he was in the shower. Trump said he's already aggravated and he's just making it worse.
Howard said the world knows that he was found liable for defamation and sexual assault. He said that the legal system has spoken. Trump said the system is a total mess. Howard and fake Trump talked about the case and fake Trump said he didn't know this woman. He said he barely spent any time in New York in the 1990s. He said he lives in Florida. Howard said he did say he grabs women by the pussy. Trump asked how he could remember something from the 1990s anyway. Howard said they say he did defame her and now he has to pay $5 million. Howard said he knows he's upset but he has to pay that money. Trump said he has a plan and he wants all of his fuckstick followers to pay him and he'll be able to pay her off.
Howard asked how you pay that. Trump said he won't be writing her a check. He said he will pay all in pennies. He said none of his attorneys will end up getting paid. He said that he's not taking responsibility at all either.
Howard said that he did it. Trump said that all the best presidents did it. He said they all raped. He named a few and said that they may have raped too. Howard said he is a fighter and that's why the republicans love him. He said no matter what he's accused of he denies it. Howard asked if he feels this is a victory because he got out of the rape charge. Trump said he does feel it's a victory. He said that fingers are like just putting the tip in.
Howard said he thought that he'd be embarrassed because she said that she wasn't able to tell if his penis was in her. Trump said that's a Trump handshake.
Howard asked if he's celebrating today. Trump said he will be grabbing the pussies of the broads at Mar-A-Lago today. He said he'll be doing that to the tune of Hail to the Chief. He started doing that and had clips of women screaming as the music played.
Howard asked if the women are wet when he sticks his fingers in. Trump said not all of them. Fake Trump was playing the pussy and making a song out of the screams. Howard asked if he can hit a note if he calls it out. He asked for an A note. Trump made one of the women scream. He thanked her. He said that was Rosario. He said he loves the Mexican people.
Howard asked what the women are wearing that allows him to get into them so quickly. Trump said they have outfits on that are easy to access. Howard said he's so lucky he's famous so he can do stuff like this. Trump said that he is able to grab 'em by the pussy.
Howard asked if he can play a song if he asks for it. Robin said how about La Cucaracha. Howard was able to play the song and Trump had his women screaming as he grabbed 'em by the pussy.
Howard said he's turned sexual assault into an art form. He thanked him for his time. Trump asked him to get him into the Rock and Roll hall of fame. He said his fingers are getting pruney from the pussy. Howard played Metallica and had Trump play his women to the tune of that song. He let him go a short time later.
Howard said he has to get down to some business. Robin said what was funny about that verdict was that the jury only took 3 hours to figure that out. Howard said they had him saying some wild stuff in his deposition. He said the guy was cooked. He said that he saw Marco Rubio saying that the jury was corrupt. He said the evidence was pretty damning.
Howard said he's sure he doesn't use a condom. He said he can imagine that. Howard said the guys did remind him that Mick Jagger has a 2 year old. He said Tony Randall had twins when he was near the end of his life. He said he made it like 5 years before he passed.
Howard said it takes a set of balls on you to have a kid at 79. He said they take a lot of energy. Robin said you can't take the grandfather role when you're the dad.
Howard said he likes Lionel Richie but they're breaking his balls in the paper for what he did over at the coronation in England. He said some people didn't like his performance so the papers are blasting him. He said he's not sure what they want from the dude but he's 73 years old. Robin said Charles wanted to hear something he knew.
Howard said he read that Lionel claims he never had any plastic surgery. He said maybe he didn't but he looks awfully good for his age.
Howard played some of Lionel's performance and said he can't tell. Robin said the mix was terrible. She said she can't tell what's going on. Howard let it play and sang a little bit.
Howard said he doesn't know what to write. He said they guys just had him singing like he's John Lennon or something. He said he can't come up with stuff. He said he doesn't know what to sing about the Peloton Girl. He said they were the ones who came up with the idea to sing about that. Richard said they had him singing about kicking ass too. Howard said he didn't like that. Steve said they tried to have him sing a pop song too but that didn't work. Howard said he hates to say it but he misses Fred. He said this is why bands break up. Fred said he'll give him a good topic. He played Mark the Bagger's ''Pussy is awesome. Pussy is the greatest.'' clip.
Richard said they have plenty of material to work with. He said they'll come up with something. Howard said it was like Beetlejuice singing something. He said Beetlejuice is the greatest Wack Packer of all time. He said he's got it all. He said he's had a bunch of hit songs over the years. He played his ''I'll see you in hell'' back in 2015. He said that was a big one. He said there's also a song he did with Leslie West from Mountain. He said Leslie was one of the best guitar players of all time. He said they came up with ''I don't know.'' He played some of that song.
Howard said that's a better song than he came up with yesterday. Richard said that guitar is amazing in that song. He said that he gets so much soul out of hitting a note. Howard said he loves that man. He said Beetlejuice includes his name in every song too. He said he sings about what he knows and he don't know.
Howard said this new song is called ''Leave Me Alone You Bastard.'' He played the song and Beetlejuice just sings about people leaving him alone. Howard said he thinks he missed with this one. Robin said she thinks it's okay. Howard played more of it. Howard said that's Beetallica. He said that someone called him Judas Beet and also Motor Tinyhead. Howard said one of the guys said it's also like System of a Downs.
Howard said speaking of Downs there's a Barbie with Down's syndrome. He said they say she's too hot though. He said he has to check that out. He said that he's been obsessed with it. He said Benjy told him that she's hot and that's what people are upset about. He said she doesn't look that different than a regular Barbie. Robin said she would not look at it and think she had Down's Syndrome.
Wolfie said JD will keep an eye on the bathroom and scope it out so he can go when someone comes out. Howard said he went out to eat with his wife and they had a public bathroom and the individual too. He said he waited to go before they left. He said he had to go pish. He said if he knows his wife is waiting for him he can't pee either. He asked JD if he has that issue too. JD said he doesn't think so but maybe. He said it might be an issue. By the time he was done thinking he did have that issue. JD said he'd have that too. Howard said sometimes he won't even finish and he'll hold it until they go somewhere else. He said everything about life is so difficult.
Howard said if he just had a big cock he wouldn't even care. Wolfie said there's a whole shy bladder center where they help you with that. Howard said they only way to get him over it is to give him a big dick transplant. He said that his dad took him out to some event and there were guys pissing into this trough in the bathroom and his dad just whipped it out and pissed. He said that his dad told him to go and he said he doesn't have to go. He said his dad said he was driving him crazy. Robin said his dad was in the military so he was used to that kind of thing.
Howard said when his dad died he remembers looking at him and thinking about how he wasted that big cock of his just fucking his mother. He said he must have fucked someone else. He said he doesn't really know. He said he wasn't a real looker. He said there's not a lot of opportunities. He said he has a feeling he may have fucked a few hookers maybe. He said he has no evidence of that though. He said that his mother said that she didn't have to worry about him running around on her. He said he knows because he's seen him.
Howard said he's pretty sure that his father wasn't fucking anyone. He said he doesn't think he got a lot of pussy.
Howard said he heard a story about his dad trying to pick up a woman before he picked up his mother. He said that other woman didn't show up to the dance he wanted to take her to and that's where he met his mother.
Howard said his dad gave him zero advice on anything. He said he told him to go to a hooker if he wanted some pussy when he got divorced. Howard said he really doesn't know what his dad was up to. He said they never really talked.
Howard said his dad had one friend he used to mention. He said that was Ernie. He said he asked what happened to him and he didn't know. He said he would ask and his dad would yell at him. He said his dad had some issue with that guy and he didn't say what it was. He said maybe his dad was on the spectrum or something. He said he didn't know what happened to Ernie. He said he didn't ask him anything because it would upset him.
Howard said he didn't want to upset his dad. He said everything seemed to annoy him. He said he's like Ronnie. Howard said he has to tell Ronnie he's not going to be able to go to his wedding. He said he's all jacked up about that but he's not going to be able to go. He said the only famous guy he'll have there is Kurt Busch.
Howard said Robin can't go either. Robin said she won't be able to get permission. Howard said he's in charge of her and he's saying no. Howard said he has a couple of things going on and he won't be able to go to the wedding. He said when he saw that Dickhole Productions web site thing he doesn't think he'll be able to go. Howard said he's going to break the news to Ronnie.
Howard said the worst thing is where there's a bathroom with an attendant. He said the guy is standing there waiting for you. He said that's the worst. He said the guy is waiting for you to pee. He said that's horrible. He said he'll go to a stall and he's pretending to shit. He said now he's acting. He said he has to put on a show for some asshole in a bathroom. He said he has a real hard time with going.
Howard said he's sure Ronnie doesn't have that problem. Ronnie said no. Wolfie said he doesn't either. He said he never even thought about it. He said he can't imagine going through life like that. JD said it's not fun. Howard had Ralph on the phone too and asked if he has that issue too. Ralph said he does and he can't take it. He said it's horrible. He said that he can't go unless he really has to go or the bathroom is empty.
Robin asked if they ever go with a friend to the bathroom. Howard said that's the worst. He said he went with Ross once and he just goes as soon as his cock comes out. He said he can't go himself and he has to try to drown out the noise. Ralph said it's the worst when you're about to go and someone says something or someone walks in and it stops flowing.
Howard said he stands there in the stall and they know he's peeing and not shitting. He said he ends up zipping up defeated if he can't go. He said it's the worst when he can't get it out. He said he's so uncomfortable. Ralph said then you have to try going again. Howard said he has to tell his wife and he's so embarrassed.
Wolfie said he read up about this and there are a lot of people who suffer from that. He said they say that 20 million people have that issue. Howard said he seems to be one of the people who suffers from everything. He said it's fucking crazy.
Howard said he even has issues peeing at home. He said lately he pees and he's right over the bowl and he pisses on the floor. He said it goes sideways. Howard said he's going to have to start sitting down. Ralph said he always sits down. He said he doesn't want piss all over the place. Howard said he has to clean up when he has piss all over. He said Beth gets upset when they have men over visiting and they piss on the floor. Howard said he looks on the floor and he sees piss down there. He said the whole stream just went left. He said that he didn't want to get his hands dirty and have to wash up. He said he wiped up the piss with his foot and then he had to get the paper off his foot. He said he balanced the paper on his foot and got it into the bowl. He said he took more paper to wipe the bowl. He said he did it all with his foot.
Howard said Wolfie and Ronnie don't know that feeling but JD does. Howard asked if JD has other phobias. JD said he's sure he does but he can't think what they are. Ralph asked what he does when he can't go. JD said one time Robin had a party and he had to use the bathroom. He said that he had to go so bad. He said he went home and he was dying on his way back. He said that was really bad.
Howard said wait until you're his age and you can't hold it anymore. He said you go every fucking minute. He said it's a real problem. He said Nowicki was telling him that e was scrolling on his phone trying to distract himself. Steve said he was never able to pee either. He said he got laughed at when he was a kid and peed in a urinal and a bunch of old men were laughing at him.
JD said he had kids make fun of him when he was in school and they were fucking around and making fun of him and saying he had shit on his fingers. He said he didn't have shit on his fingers but they said he did.
Ralph asked how the phone helps JD pee. JD said it distracts you. He said it makes you think about anything but peeing. Howard said he talks to himself. He said it must relax his sphincter. He said what a perfect word that is. He said it's really is a great word.
Robin said JD is the kid in school who kids waited to do something wrong so they could shit on him. Howard said what's great about JD is that he grew up into that super star he is. He said things are all good now. He said they worked out well. JD said he has everyone's respect. Howard said the character he created is like Uberman.
Howard said he didn't mention this but JD got shit on by a bird in Miami. He said then he stepped in dog shit. JD said he seems to do that at everything they do. He said that he was out with Chris and Blitt and he was helping them out and this bird shits all over him on the beach. Howard laughed. Wolfie said Ronnie knew that he was going to step in dog shit and called it before it happened. Howard asked how he knew. Ronnie said he was walking ahead and saw the shit and he knew that JD was going to step in it. He said he walked right in it.
Howard asked JD how that happens. JD said he has no idea because he's always looking down. He said he never looks up. Ronnie said he saw him trying to wipe it off his shoes. He said by the time they got to the new place he thought it was gone. JD said the shoes don't smell. Steve said they do. He said that smell never goes away.
Howard asked if JD was all defeated after that. Ronnie said he just kept moving on. Howard said he never has any luck. Robin said JD should have a dog shit kit to sell.
Howard said after the bird shit on JD then he got locked out of his tell room. He said he wasn't able to clean himself up. JD said the batteries in his key card thing died. Ronnie said he had the same thing happen to him. He said he had to shit though so that was the worst.
Ralph said forget the court case but Trump is doing a live town hall on CNN tonight. He said that's going to be off the rails. He said that will be so great. Howard said they're going to have a field day with him. Howard said he doesn't watch CNN anymore. He said he doesn't know who this woman is that will be doing the town hall. Her name was Kaitlan Collins. Howard asked JD who the hottest anchor is on news. Ralph said something that Howard had to dump out of in the middle of that. Howard said hung up on him over whatever it was he said.
Howard said Ralph is so fucking weird that he's too weird for him. He said he has a high tolerance for weird too. He said he used to hang out with Ralph but he did weird things. He said he once asked if he could shower at his house before they went out once. He said he had to tell him no. He said he asked to use his washer and dryer too.
Howard said Trump is doing the town hall with this Kaitlan Collins. He said he might have to tune in for that.
Howard answered a knock at the door and it was fake Trump again. Howard spent a minute talking to him about Kaitlan Collins. Fake Trump was saying that they told him he can sleep with her if he does this town hall. Howard told him not to grab her by the pussy.
Howard told Ronnie he has to RSVP no for the wedding. Ronnie said that's fine. He said it saves him a big headache. He said he knew he wasn't going to come. Howard said he loves him and Stephanie but he's not going. He said he won't tell him why but he has a good reason. Howard said it's his fault anyway. He said he can't do it. Ronnie said thanks and have a good day. He logged off. Howard said he loves him but he can't go. Howard said he's such a cry baby. He said he should come back and apologize to him for that.
Howard said people tell him he should go to his wedding. He said he just can't go. He did a live commercial read and went to break.
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Howard came back and said this song is about the Chicken Ranch brothel. He said that whore house was a rite of passage for some of the boys. He said that Dusty went there when he was like 13. He said this is such a great song. Robin said a good song did come out of that. Howard said the song is very simple and that's what Billy Gibbons said makes the song so great. Howard read what Dusty said about the whore house.
Howard said maybe he should go to a whore house so he can write a song about it. He said he really doesn't know anything. He said he loves ZZ Top. He asked who inducted them into the hall of fame. Howard said he knows. He said it was Keith Richards. He said that makes sense. Fred played Ronnie's ''Lets fuck some whores!'' drop after that song was over.
Howard said at 13 he was able to touch a girl's titties. He said he wasn't sure if she would go for it but it was over the clothes of course. He said that his head would have exploded if he was under the clothes. He said it was more innocent back then. He said he's sure now 13 year olds are doing everything. He said they see it all on the internet. He said when he was a boy he didn't even know what different positions were. He said now everyone knows it all from the internet.
Howard took a call from Mariann from Brooklyn who said she saw the tape of Ronnie being pushed on the swing. She said that Howard looks amazing too. She said that she feels bad that he can't go to Ronnie's wedding. Howard said he has a good reason. He said he wanted to go to Vegas for a bunch of reasons. He said he wanted to take his daughter there. He said he had the whole thing worked out but then some stuff came up. He said that he loves Ronnie and he loves that he's getting married but there is something conflicting. He said he shouldn't have told him on the air. Mariann said that he should call him after the show. Howard said he will do that.
Ronnie said he doesn't have to call. He said he knows why already. He said he really does. Howard said he will call. Ronnie said he won't answer. He said he knows the reason and it's fine. Howard said he really doesn't. Ronnie said he does. They went back and forth saying that a bunch of times.
Howard asked if he's going to be a little girl about this. Howard said he didn't tell him to move to Vegas. He said he has something going on and he knows about it. Ronnie said he odes know about it. Howard said he doesn't know all of it. He said it's because of Robin. He said she has something going on. He said he will call his new security guy Bill then. Ronnie said go ahead.
Mariann said that he better take that fucking call Ronnie. Ronnie said she doesn't know him. He said he already knows why he's not coming. Howard said he really doesn't know. Howard said he's going to be a pain in the ass. Ronnie said it's all fine. He said he's not taking his call and he doesn't have to send a card or anything. He said it's fine. He said he already marked it down. Howard asked if he can call. Ronnie said he doesn't want to talk about that.
Robin said how about friendship. Ronnie laughed. He said yeah, lets talk about that. He said he doesn't need to hear this from Howard. Howard said he has something to tell him off the air. Robin said maybe he can't display it the way he wants. Howard said Ronnie is 73 and immature. He said he lost hope for this guy. He said he's going to call him man to man and he has something to tell him. Ronnie said he doesn't want to hear it. Howard said he just sent Nowicki $2500 for his wedding. Steve said that was very sweet and generous. Howard said he's a real man. He said he just accepted it. He said that Ronnie is laying a trip on him. Ronnie said he's really not.
Mariann said Ronnie looks fabulous. She said he looks amazing. Ronnie said he has no problems. He said he's thrilled. Mariann was going on and on so Howard hung up on her. He said she filibusters.
Howard said Steve's wedding is in the New York area and he's not going. He said Ronnie is halfway across the country. He said he has some shit going on. He said he can't go. He said to Ronnie that's not acceptable. Ronnie said don't make a thing out of it. Howard said he's being a little bitch about it. Ronnie said he has nothing to apologize for. Howard said he's acting like he's marrying him. He said he's not. He said he has shit going on that day. He asked what day it is again. Ronnie said he doesn't even know.
Howard said Bubba may back out of it now that he's not going. He said Bubba wanted to see him there.
Howard said he has told Ronnie that he had to step up and marry this girl. He said he told him that a lot in the car. Ronnie said he remembers. Robin said Howard even proposed for him. Howard said his proposal was so bad that he saved the day.
Howard said he gave Ronnie a life and that's why he met Stephanie. He said meeting him was the best thing to happen to him. He said he'd still be driving a car if he didn't meet him. He said he should be apologizing to him for making him feel bad. Ronnie said he can wait for that.
Howard played a clip of Ronnie proposing to Stephanie. That's where he had her get the ring out of the fucking closet.
Howard said he's going to call later and he can either pick up or not. He said he would be honored if he did pick up. Robin said he should call 500 times if he has to. She said he can annoy the shit out of him. Howard asked if they're still friends. Ronnie said oh yeah. Howard asked how much of a check does he want. Ronnie said he doesn't want anything. Howard said he gave Steve 2500. He said he has to figure out what to give Ronnie.
Howard said this is Ronnie's second marriage so he should give less. He asked how much he wants. Ronnie said he doesn't want anything. He said he's not going to say anything. Howard said maybe 5000. He asked if that would make him stop crying. Ronnie said he doesn't want anything. Howard said he's known Steve for just 8 years and Ronnie for 40. He said he should give him more. He said it's too hard to figure out how much he should give.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he's a total dick. He said he should go. He said that Ronnie is letting him off the hook too. Howard said something came up and he can't go. The caller said that's bullshit. Howard said Ronnie knew from the beginning that he wasn't going to go. The caller asked what kind of friend he is. Howard said no offense but this isn't about friendship. He said that Ronnie knows when he came through for him. He said don't worry about that. He said he has never been better to anyone than he was to Ronnie. He said he can't fend for himself and he helped him out. Ronnie said it goes both ways. The caller, Morty, said it does go both ways.
Howard said he sent Ronnie to Puerto Rico right before COVID. He said he's done plenty for Ronnie. He said that he has to calm down over there. Ronnie said he is calm. Howard said all Ronnie has done is bitch about the wedding and now all he cares about is that he's not coming. Ronnie asked why he's pawning it off on him now. Howard said he is. He said he's not taking responsibility for his actions just like Trump.
Howard said he's going to call Ronnie. Howard said Robin is ill so put it all together. He said Robin needs him. Robin went along with that and said that's right. Howard said Ronnie is miserable. Ronnie said he's really not. He said he gets where it's coming from. He said he doesn't have to call. He said just send the card.
Howard let Ronnie go and played him off with a song parody about him getting pegged by Stephanie.
Howard said he won't even go to weddings that are an hour away. He said flying to Las Vegas is asking a lot. Robin said she doesn't like friendships with requirements. She said that's not good. Howard said he hasn't left his house in years. He said he didn't go to Richard's wedding and that was in Manhattan and he lives in Manhattan. He said he didn't step foot in that thing. He said he didn't go to Fred's wedding because he wasn't even invited. He said he had his plumber there instead. He said he loves Fred. Fred did his Ronnie impression telling him that he didn't have to call him.
Howard said Ed Sheeran is coming in. He said he's had a tough time since they last saw him. He said they have to talk to him about that and about the royal wedding and all of that. They went to break a short time later.
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Howard came back and said this is a great song and a great album. He said Ed is a big Elton John guy. He said that Elton gave him a huge penis statue a few years ago. Howard said Ed Sheeran is there. He said his new album - (Subtract) is out. He said his new documentary is fantastic too. He said that's The Sum of it All on Disney+.
Howard said Ed is wearing an iWatch. Ed said he did have one but this is just a regular watch. Howard said he's not getting an iWatch. He said he refuses to get reminders.
Ed corrected Howard on the penis statue thing. He said he was the one who gave one to Elton instead of the other way around. He said he sent him the penis statue and he loved it. He said for his 75th he gave him a micro penis from the same stone mason who did the giant one.
Howard said you have to be careful with gifts you give to celebrities. He said that it could set someone off. He said getting gifts for Elton John must be tough. He said he doesn't have a piano in his house. Ed said he actually does. Howard said maybe he already told him that.
Howard said congratulations on the new album. He said he will tell him his favorite songs .HE said he thinks he wants to know. He said he also wants to congratulate him on his court case. He said there's nothing better than winning when someone accuses you of ripping them off and you're proven innocent. He said Ed showed the jury how close it was by playing for them in court. Ed demonstrated what he played for them by playing for Howard. He explained how he explained it in court and how songs are so similar that they can sound like they're a rip off but they're really not. He said you can't copyright a chord sequence.
Howard said if he was on the jury he would understand. Ed said the thing about these cases is that you have expert musicologists and they argue about the musical-ness of it and it takes a day to go through it. He said that if you can just sit through it and listen to how this is this and this is that then you get it. He said he's not sure why they don't have someone appointed to say what is what. He said that the two sides are going to have their own things. He said this took 8 yeas and he's just glad it's over. He said he had to take a stand and go to it. He said either way you lose. He said you spend who knows how much and either way you're losing. He said then there's a stain on your career the rest of your life. He said you have to take the risk.
Howard said he hugged the other people in this case. He said he's a really good guy. He said the documentary shows that. Howard asked why he would hug someone after they sued him. Ed said there's a difference between the lawyers and them. He said lawyers can be nasty. He said he got battered by them. He said that he didn't hug the lawyers. He said he felt that the woman understood at the end that he didn't rip her off. He said that it wasn't a pleasant thing. He said he didn't want to walk away from it with any animosity. He said he didn't want to walk away sneering or anything.
Howard said he missed his grandmother's funeral because of his case. Ed said he thought that the case was going to be over by then. He said things were going fine but then they called his manager to the stand and that delayed the case. He said that he didn't want to make it be a sub story in his case so he just tuned in to his brother who was there and he watched it on a Facetime video kind of thing. Howard said needless to say he won't be sending them a penis statue any time soon.
Howard said for 8 years he had this little nauseous feeling with him. He said he was accused of stealing a Marvin Gaye song. He said it must have been very painful. He said good for him winning. Ed said thanks. He said that he sees this going on a lot and people will settle and he was advised to do that. He said it happened once before and he settled but this was something he had to take a stand on. Howard said it's really hard to do that. He said that it's also the family of Marvin Gaye. Ed said it was actually the family of Ed Townsend. He said that he has moved on from that now and he's going to keep moving on.
Howard asked if he got a lot of calls from other artists who were happy he was fighting it. Ed said he did. He said that Jon Bon Jovi congratulated him. He said people were saying that he would quit if he had lost. He said he really would have because it takes the joy out of the whole thing.
Howard said the documentary is really good. He said that it's 4 parts and he really let it all show in it. He said he has had an incredible few years since he last saw him. Ed said that's what they wanted to do going into it. He said the guys who produced it wanted to do it that way. He said they wanted it to be more human and they were going to film his life and make it into a documentary with whatever they found in his life. Howard said he's a kind of private guy though. Ed said that some of his life is but he has a friend who has been filming him for 6 years. He said he was in his car after his friend Jamal died and he broke down because he didn't feel like there was a camera in the car at the time.
Ed said he is uncomfortable watching the documentary. He said there's a lot he would have cut out of it. He said that he had to put out this album and it's about grief. Howard said he hit him with some heavy stuff on this album. He said the song Salt Water was right. He said his father died over the summer last year and he knew it was his time but he has this horrible image of him with his arms up in the air and he can't get that out of his head. He said he feels like Salt water is about death. Ed said it's about suicide so yes. He said so many of his albums are one thing about heavy things but this whole album is about that. He said it's going to be hard to fit them in at his concerts. He said it's something he had to put out and he didn't know how it was going to be received.
Howard said he was listening to Salt Water and he started crying. He said the song really got him. He said it's about the final moments of your life and he thought about his dad. Howard asked if he can play a little of that. Ed said he can. He went into the song and played the whole thing.
Howard said that is good. He said he can't be having a good day when you write that. He asked why he was thinking about suicide. Ed said he has never really put that into a song before and he was having a time of his life when his wife found a tumor and his friend had just died. He said there was a lot going on. He said he lost another mate of his. Howard asked what that guy died of. Ed said it was a heart thing that they haven't quite figured out. He said there's a lot of water stuff on his album and that's like feeling like you're under water in your life. Howard asked if he was feeling suicidal. Ed said it was more about the what if but not that he was going to. Howard said he's not sure why but it took him right to his father dying.
Howard said that guitar he plays looks like such a cheap piece of crap. Ed said this guitar is something he wanted to play. He said he wanted to play this Louden guitar and he always wanted one. He said they were like 4 grand though. He said one of the guys in Snow Patrol got him one made. He said he asked the guy who runs Louden to make some guitars with him and that's what this guitar is. Howard asked what it is about that guitar. Ed said they're really well made. He said this one is made smaller for him. He said if you play a deep one in a stadium it makes a weird sound. He said this one is specifically for stage. He said you wouldn't record with this one.
Howard said the other thing that freaks him out is that he never uses a pick. Ed said he will if he's strumming fast. He said that 98 times out of 100 he's using his fingers.
Howard said it's mind blowing the number of hours he puts into his career. He said that he will play anywhere any time to get over his fear. Ed said he would go play places and everyone around him was better than him. He said that the one thing he can do is out work everyone. He said that's the one thing he was in charge of. He said he wanted to go out and play and keep doing that to get better.
Howard said he knows when he started out in radio he was dead last. He said he was the worst one on radio. He said he had to just keep doing it to get better. Ed said there is that Malcolm Gladwell 10,000 hours thing and it really is true. He said there are some people who are naturally talented but they don't have the drive to get better because they're so good. Howard said he knew guys like that. Ed asked if Howard thinks he can get better. Howard said absolutely. He said he thinks he did a good show yesterday. He said he got a note from Steve Martin saying it was a great show. He said he doesn't think it was that great. He said that he's never really sure.
Howard said he thought it was interesting that Ed said he didn't care if people liked his new album but then he contradicted himself 2 minutes later saying he does care. Ed said that the fans are liking it and the critics are too. He said he's never had critics give him a 5 star review. He said he writes music because he has to and he releases it because he wants to connect. He said he doesn't care what people think about it in that moment but you are hoping that people will like it when he does release it. Ed said both of their careers are based on popularity so it does matter.
Howard said that it must be scary when the critics start to like you. Ed said this album isn't made to be played in a club or anything. He said this is something that's like a solitary album. He said you might want to listen to it in a car or something. He said you have to listen to it as a whole too.
Howard said it's kind of like Springsteen putting out Nebraska. Ed said that's his favorite Springsteen album. He said that it is kind of like that. He said there are many ways of measuring success and what Howard said about Salt Water is what he wanted to hear. He said that's the kind or reaction he wants.
Howard said he really enjoys his music and he had a similar reaction to ''Eyes Closed.'' He said he didn't know it was about this friend Jamal. He said that was like his everything. He said that guy believed in him when no one else did. Ed said he kind of gave him his platform. He said that they met in their late teens and this guy had his YouTube platform where he was doing videos. He said that he put him on there and that's what helped him out. Howard played the song he put out when he was 15 on Jamal's channel. Ed said that he had that platform where people were taking note. He said that he met his manager through that and that started this whole wave. He said he was living with Jamal too and he was a very good friend. He said that he got the call that he was dead and he didn't believe it. He said he was in constant contact with him. He said in Jamal's culture they do this 9 day celebration of life and they made this mural of him and all of this. He said that it really didn't hit home until the funeral day. He said that was the thing that really hit home. He said that Eyes Closed was written in the month between his death and the funeral. He said he would go to the places they used to go to and that's what the inspiration behind the song was.
Howard asked him what the process is because this guy was only 31. He said his friend died of a drug overdose. He said that was shocking because he had a heart attack. Howard said when someone is taken away like that it's even more of a shock. He said the guy is just gone. He asked when you write the song. Ed said he's constantly writing songs so that's kind of his therapy. He said he was doing that during that time anyway. Howard asked if he was angry with him. Ed said not at all. He said what he's angry about is that there are things he won't get to do or see. Howard asked if he wonders why he didn't take care of himself better. Ed said there's more to what the media has reported. He said that he finds press with people of note to be disrespectful. He said he's not sure who reads that stuff. He said he's not sure why they have to talk about the way it happens. He said it's not nice for his family. He said it's horrible. He said that someone has passed away and they're grieving and then the put the coroner's report in the paper 3 months later. He said it's messed up. He said all of that makes him angry.
Howard said he was curious but not because he was being nosey. He said he wanted to know what happened to this guy. Ed said he gets that but if the family hasn't come out and said what it was then don't look into it. He said he knows people who have taken their own lives but the families won't talk about it. He said that they don't want it out there. Howard said that's a good point. Ed said it's morbid and weird to want to know when someone isn't sharing it. Ed said that he and his friend Nick talk about stuff but they don't talk about everything. He said that he and Jamal talked about things and would catch up. He said they don't talk about their feelings. He said that might be a guy thing. He said the worst thing you can say is ''Are you alright'' and they say they're fine but then you ask again if they're really alright. He said they get uptight about things. He said maybe he should have done that with Jamal.
Ed said that his wife gets together with friends and someone always ends up crying. He said that she finds it odd that he doesn't do that with friends. He said it feels like the point of the night is to distract yourself from the things that are going on. He said that maybe it is a guy thing. He said that's what he and his friends do. Howard said that would make him angry that he didn't really talk. Ed said they talked all day every day. He said there is no regret there. He said it's weird putting out this documentary and this album. He said it's stuff that he doesn't talk about. He said that people see him and they don't think that this stuff is going on in his life. He said they think he's all good. He said the inner feelings are pure terror. He said people are saying what they want about you and you have to just stand there.
Howard said he can't imagine going out in front of 70,000 people but he looks so calm when he goes out there. Ed said he must feel that way going on radio in front of 10s of millions of people. Howard said it is weird. He said that he said to his wife that if you gauge the amount of his audience it's like broadcasting to 25 football stadiums all at once. He said what's weird with Ed is that he's up there by himself. Ed said Howard is there by himself.
Howard asked how much alone time he needs after a show. Ed said he used to take a lot of drugs and go to the bars. He said now he has a family and he drinks wine. He said he used to think it was an excuse to come down after a show. He said that you end up buzzed until 2 in the morning. He said there's a real adrenaline thing going after a show. He said he likes being around people and he doesn't like being alone.
Howard asked if he asks people how he did or is he settled that he did okay. Ed said with the album thing the scariest day is the release day. He said a month later you find out if people like it or not. He said with shows he's done maybe a couple thousand of those. He said that you know when it goes well or not. He said he had a show in New Zealand and his loop pedal stopped working. He said he had to play acoustically. He said he didn't think it was a good show but people seemed to like it. He said that can happen.
Howard said he was proud of him when he did the song about Jamal dying. He said that's what the song ''Eyes Closed'' and he did that in the documentary. He said he broke down and cried on stage. Howard said he was proud of him and that made him like the song even more. Ed said he's not even a crier. He said that was strange for him to break down like that. Ed said that in that moment playing the song it was still his song that hadn't been released yet. He said now it's out and people are connecting to it.
Howard said that song is very persona. He asked Ed if he can do it for them now. He said that he loved this guy Jamal and he was his comfort zone. He said he wasn't asking anything of him. He said that a lot of people must ask him for things all the time. Ed said that he had to force things on Jamal. He said that he would have to ask him to do things for him. He said Jamal didn't want to take from him so he had to do that. Howard had him perform the song.
After the song Howard said that is such a beautiful song. He said it's a great tribute to Jamal. He said that it's really heavy. Ed said he wanted the world to stop when he died like it did when the queen died. He said that the world goes on and there is a set period of time that you're allowed to grieve. He said that he doesn't feel like even now he wants to move on. He said that he wants to be sad about him whenever he wants to. He said there is no set time limit. Howard said he's so right. He said he bets that even now people are telling him to get on with it. He asked how you're supposed to know when you're supposed to get over it.
Ed said that he loves to think about Jamal and how funny he was. He said he feels happy about that stuff. He said that grief is something you live with and you build your life around it.
Howard asked if he had to block Jamal out to sing it. He asked if he goes to another place in his head. Ed said totally. He said it's a different thing now that the song is out there. He said he's had people share stories with him. He said he did a gig there in Brooklyn and when he finished he broke down crying. He said he went to the after party and then everyone was coming up and telling stories about people they lost. He said it's a really heavy thing. He said he is thinking about other people while he's performing the song. He said he has to tone down his inner emotion.
Howard said that's a heavy thought. He said in the documentary he was singing Amazing Grace and that was very powerful. He said he wants him to do that so badly. Ed said he ends the shows playing an Irish folk song. He said he can do that now. Howard said that would be awesome. Howard had him do that for him. He did the folk song and then went into Amazing Grace.
After the songs Ed said that was so powerful at Jamal's funeral. He said he could see his mom dealing with so much. He said it was really powerful. Howard said he just brought out so much emotion in him. He said he can imagine his fans love him even more after hearing something like that. He said there's a maturity there that's very powerful. He said he can't even imagine who the guys were who passed on him at the record companies. Ed said he gets it. He said he was doing strange things and he was kind of fat at the time. He said that's not a package that can be marketed easily. He said now it's different because the more true you are to yourself the better you can do.
Howard said he was thinking about how great it is that he can sing his own songs. He said that's got to be something you're born with. Ed said not really. He said he can pull up some videos that he did when he was 14. He said the song ''Addicted'' is something he did back then and he didn't have talent. He said that he got successful at 19 so it took some time. Howard asked the guys to pull the song up. Ed said skip to about 20 seconds and you'll hear. He said he thought he was a guitar virtuoso. The guys played the song and Howard said he's not kidding. He asked to hear more. He said this is actually great. He asked if he took singing lessons. Ed said this is what he tells kids. He said this was him at 14 and he wrote his hit at 18. He said he had to learn over those four years. Howard asked if he was going out and performing that he learned. Ed said you learn from failure. He said you learn nothing from success. He said no one talks about failure anymore. He said that's where you learn.
Howard said this is such a great message. He said people don't believe it. He said he truly believes that if you work hard enough you can become great and an expert. Ed said you have to be rubbish at first. He said you have to believe that it will get better.
Howard said he was told that he was horrible on the air and he was going to be fucked if he didn't get a real job.
Howard asked where the belief comes from. He said inside Ed must still feel like that chubby kid. Ed said of course. He said he can't do anything else though. He said he played a wedding for 2 hours once and got 200 bucks. He said that he paid his rent with that. He said he knew he could make a living doing music. He said that he knew that was going to be his life. He said as soon as he got that gig he knew he could make a living. He said that spurred him on. Ed said there are guys making a living in radio who aren't huge like Howard is. He said you can do it. Howard said when he went from making $96 to $250 a week he thought he had made it and he knew he could keep doing that for a living.
Howard and Ed talked about talent shows and how contestants can make a living after the shows even if they don't make it big. Ed said he did a talent show at 16 and he got into the final 10. He said that he did a dance that's still out there. He said that they told him that he was ruining his career doing the show. He said he didn't know what he was going to do after that.
Howard said he thinks that people do these talent shows and they're not that committed to the job. He said he wants to tell some of the kids to go out and write songs with someone and they can do it. He said they think they can't do it after failing on a show.
Howard asked if Ed had a negative reaction to King Charles being on American Idol. Ed said he's got some Irish in him and he likes that he has an MBE over there. He said there are some things he disagrees with over there. He said that there are some he agrees with. He said he doesn't want to say which is which though.
Howard said when he lost Jamal was that during his wife's cancer. He said he didn't get the time line. He said he went through a lot. Ed said Cherry had her cancer in early February and they lost Jamal just a short time later. He said his wife is doing fine now though. He said she had her operation and she's doing well.
Howard asked if they used any pregnancy stuff to get her pregnant. Ed said not at all. Howard said he must have thought he was fucked when she got cancer. Ed said that you can't just go and fix it. He said it's really tough. He said he made the documentary to not talk about it but people are interested and he's talking about it. He said it was a scary time. He said what got him the most was being in court and having this battle going on. He said you really don't know what people are going through. He said everyone has something challenging going on in their life. Howard said he had a lot piled on him at once. He said he had all of that and his kid coming too. Ed said it can tear away that care free innocence. He said that he is in his head a lot more now.
Howard asked when he decided to do therapy. Ed said it's different here in the States. He said that over in England they look at you like you're crazy for going to therapy but in the States they congratulate you. He said his friends and family had weird reactions to it all. He said that he was miserable the 6 months after Jamal died. He said that he was hard to live with. He said he thinks he had a lot of anger in him and he didn't think he was pleasant to be around. He said Cherry asked him if he thought about therapy. He said 2 years before that he wouldn't have thought about it. He said that he did think it might help when she suggested it. Ed said people think he's got things figured out but he really doesn't.
Howard said he had father issues so he got a male therapist to talk to. Ed said he can't say what he got because the British press will track the person down. He said that he told that person things he hasn't even told his wife. He said he vented for an hour and left. He said he vented for about 3 weeks and then he got things unpacked the fourth week.
Howard said he talked to Ed years ago and he thought he should be in therapy. Ed said that he was only 24 then. He said he hadn't been through a lot of this stuff. He said he had some hardship there but not all of this. He said he felt lonely but he just spent more time with people. He said Jamal's death really brought back things that he hadn't felt since he was 6. Howard said you don't think about losing your best friend at that age. Ed said it happens to everyone. He said there's this invisible barrier with people and they never talk to you about it. He said a friend came to him and told him about his feelings about losing a friend and they had never talked about it before.
Howard said the other thing he does that's smart is that he has people in his life who he will call to discuss things with. He said he has friends who have similar careers that they relate over. He said he talks to Taylor Swift about things. Ed said there can be very few people who don't know how it is. He said Robbie Williams is like that over in England. Howard asked if he ever feels like he's bothering these people when he talks to them. Ed said it depends on the day. He said it's different every day. He said sometimes he may feel like he is bothering them. He said with Robbie he emails him and they talk that way. He said Chris Martin does this amazing thing where he emails him and tells him what songs he likes. He said that he grew up listening to him so that means a lot to him. He said that he really loves and respects him so that makes his day. He said Howard must get that with Steve Martin texting him. Howard said that's a loving thing to do. He said that he went on The Tonight Show for the first time and he got a call from Rodney Dangerfield. He said that Rodney was a hero of his. He said he told him he loved what he did on the show. He said Steve Martin wrote him and said he was killing in the car and that made his whole day. Ed said that it can mean a lot to you so it's a good thing to do. He said he feels like Elton John does that in a way. He said that he encourages the next person who comes along. He said that he likes to do that as well. He said he has befriended a lot of new artists and he feels like they're all running in a race and you just want to spur people on.
Howard said when Harry Styles comes around that has to be hard. Ed said that he has known Harry a long time. He said both of them had hits at the same time. He said he has always rooted for him. He said that it's hard to be in a boy band and starting your own career. He said that has to be a hard thing but he's managed to do it.
Howard asked if anything ever happens when they hang with people like Harry and Taylor. Ed said that anyone he relates to he may see once or twice a year. He said when they catch up it's really good. He said that his closer friends he's talking to every day. He asked if Howard ever hangs out with Steve Martin. Howard said he has. He said it's not often though. He said Ed is smart doing things the way he does. He said he avoided people in the radio business for years and one of the joys he has it getting to know people like Steve Martin. He said there's so much to learn from a guy like that.
Ed said you can talk on a level that you're both at. He said he hung out with Howard and he can relate to his first struggle as a radio DJ. He said that they know they're very different but they have the same tenacity and drive.
Howard said you have to watch Ed's new documentary. He said it's really good and the album is great too. He said he didn't know he was born with this birthmark on his face. He said they messed up the removal and that made him stutter. He said there are all kinds of stories about that in the documentary. Ed said when he was 9 he got the Marshall Mathers LP. He said his uncle told him he was going to be the next big thing. He said he was able to cure his stutter from rapping his songs. He said that he was able to play with Eminem and his dad had never been a fan of his. He said he remembers his dad listening to the album for the first time and asking him about listening to that at the age of 9.
Howard said it must have been great to be able to induct him into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Ed said it was great. He said he knew he would do anything to perform with him and it was worth it. Howard said he must know that story now. Ed said he does. He said he's done a few songs with him and he's another person he relates to. He said he also lives in his home town still. He said he has that whole ecosystem around him. He said he relates to him with that and talking to him makes him feel less weird.
Howard asked if he ever met Clapton. Ed said he did and he played on one of his songs. He said that he learned a lot of his songs. He said he never thought he would meet him. He said he knew that he had an in at the record company. He said Eric played at the Queen's Jubilee. He said that he saw that performance and started to learn his songs. He said it's been 10 years to the day since he played there. He said that he became friends with him from there. Ed played some Layla for Howard.
Howard asked if Ed has ever been a shredder. Ed said not at all. Howard said he's got some story in him. He said his new album - (Subtract) is something. He said that they're done with the math analogies with the albums though. Ed said he has another 5 symbols to use but they're not maths. Howard said Ed spent 10 years on this album and he threw the songs all out and started over. He asked where that 10 years is. Ed said he should put it out but he might call it Subtracted or something. Ed said he had over thought the album and he wanted it to be perfect. Howard asked if he had a song he didn't put out that he thinks he should put out. Ed said that there are some songs on there. He said that he put so much work into it that it would be weird not to put it out. He said this new album is doing okay. Howard said he thinks it just went to number 1. He said he thinks that's the word he got this morning. Ed said that would be great. Howard said his documentary is on Disney+. He asked Ed if he can play another song. Ed said he can. He said that there's something that Howard does in his interviewing approach that he never tries to catch him out. He said that he finds himself opening up about things and he loves to do the interviews with him. He said that his guests just open up and they don't sensationalize that stuff here. He said the amount of people that say ''Loved you on Howard'' is amazing. He said that every artist must feel that way when they come up. Howard said he has such respect for musicians. He said he holds them in high regard. He said that he never got a charge from religion. He said that he did get that from music though. Ed said music is something else. He said that music can bring people together. He said everyone is at a concert for one thing and that's the music.
Howard asked if he has one song he'd like to play before he goes. Ed said he was going to play a song about taking away the feeling of youth. He said it's kind of a dark thing to play on this note but the whole album is dark. He said the song is called ''End of Youth'' and that's one of his favorites on the album. He went right into the song after that.
After the song Howard said that was beautiful. He said he knows he has to get going. He said the whole album is great and thanked him for his time. Ed said that he thanks Howard for that time too. He said this platform is so great. He said Howard digs deep and they talk about things. He said this is why the show is amazing. He said he gets things out of people that no one else could. He said it's very comfortable there too. Howard gave him some plugs and wrapped up. They were done around 10:50am.