For the week of 10/31/2022 to 11/04/2022

• Back In Studio - Preparing For Bruce. 10/31/22. 7:10am
  Howard returned to his SiriusXM studio for the first time in almost 3 years. He did it just for Bruce Springsteen. The show started a little late because Howard hadn't been in the studio for so long.

  Howard started the show talking about the mash up song with The Great American Nightmare and some Bruce Springsteen songs they had playing. Howard said today he's dressed up as a guy who actually goes into the office. Robin said he looks like he's on a set that's not real. She said now he's back at the office. Howard said he is back.

  Howard said everyone is excited about this Bruce Springsteen interview. He said everyone is making him nervous. He said he feels a scratch in his throat already. He said he thinks he has COVID already. He said it took just one minute. Robin asked how many people he passed on his way in. Howard said it was zero. He said Otis was there and got him in the elevator. He said everyone was covered today. He said they marched him up there and everyone was covered. He said the office is completely empty. He said he ran into one guy named Bruce. He said he was covered up too. He said he went to his office and dumped his stuff and came right into the studio which was empty. He said it was empty all over. He said the only person there is Human Newman who is sitting in his lap.

  Howard said one guy was in the office and tried to get near him but he got tased and taken out of there.

  Howard said this Bruce Springsteen thing is going to give him a heart attack. He said he was going though all things Bruce over the weekend. He said he was talking to Jon Hein about Bruce. He said he's really excited about it. He said he was driving over the weekend. He said he went to see his mother. He said he's not sure how she found out about this but she knows about the Bruce interview.

  Howard said he visited his mom and talked to her about this interview. He said she somehow knew a lot about Bruce. He said she knew he was married to a singer. He said she was very aware. He said that he was shocked about how much she had to ask him about.

  Howard said he went into his apartment and he hadn't been there in years. He said he had to get things set up over there. He said Beth was supposed to come in with him but she said she had to stay home with Yoda who is dying. He said he started to cry the other day. He said he has very aggressive cancer. He said they gave him some stuff to get him to eat. He said he brushed him the other day and he jumped up to come over to him. He said he told him what a good boy he is. He said he was losing it. He said Beth wanted to come in but she wanted to stay with Yoda.

  Howard said Beth packed up a dinner for him. He said he left on Sunday. He said he brought everything with him. He said he has special shampoos and stuff. He said there's a lot. He said he wasn't sure what to wear for Bruce. He said he's downplaying it today. He said he could have worn a John Varvatos outfit. He said Bruce might think he's trying too hard to impress him. He said he wore a sweater and a t-shirt. He said he didn't want to make Bruce think he was trying to seduce him. He went for something simple. Robin said it was the right move. She said he looks fine.

  Howard said John made him a coat that comes down to his knees and he was thinking of wearing that. He said he didn't want Bruce thinking he was a douche. He said he didn't want to look like he was trying to be more rock and roll than Bruce. Robin said Bruce never went for that glam. Howard said that's why he doesn't have any embarrassing photos of himself. He said he got ear rings and he thought that he shouldn't have done that. He said he didn't think he should sell his music catalog and things like that.

  Howard said he was going through Bruce's music catalog and there are just so many songs. He said you forget about them. He said it's so vast he could spend 5 hours just talking about that with him. He said Bruce is the one driving the whole thing with the band. He said he has had so many hits and he has never gotten to number 1. He said it drives him nuts. He said there have been cover versions that have gone to number 1.

  Robin said you wonder how all those songs happen when someone can only write one hit. Howard said he was obsessed with him over the weekend. He said he has so many Grammys and other awards. He said they could play a game where you guess what he does with his awards. Robin said she thinks he has a trophy room. Howard said he may have to bet her on that. He said if he were Bruce he's not sure what he would do with the awards. He talked about all of these Grammys and Tonys he has. He said he has an Oscar too. He said he has so many awards. He said he doesn't have an Emmy. Robin said she's thinking he has that stuff in his personal office or something like that. Howard said he might.

  Howard said he heard that Bruce hands out Grammys to trick or treaters on Halloween. He said maybe he uses them as a door stop. Robin said that's horrible. Howard said that would be great. He said he might have a case full. Robin said he must have gold records and all of that.

  Howard said Bruce has 3 kids and they're all grown up. He said that you can't turn the house into something that shows off who you are. He said that he might have to hide that stuff. Robin said she thinks he has a dedicated room for the trophies. Robin said he may not even go in there that much. She said he may take someone in there when they ask about them.

  Howard said Robin could be wrong. He said no offense but she's the wrong person to ask about this because she hangs huge pictures of herself in her house. Robin said she knows people who have big pictures of themselves too. Howard said he's never letting her back in his house if she's going to squeal on him. He said his wife likes to look at that.

  Howard said Bono once talked about all of the things that Bruce didn't do to embarrass himself. Robin said he doesn't have to walk around looking like he's in a Halloween costume. Howard said there were a lot of 80s bands and they're still wearing what they wore back then. Robin said she sees them traveling in that stuff. Howard said there are guys who got out of that look and they don't look like they used to. He said Bruce still looks like Bruce. He said he did it right.

  Howard said Bruce has a recording studio at his house in New Jersey. He said he has only gotten one major award himself. He said he's in the radio hall of fame but the only award he got that was important was the Blockbuster Award. He said they're out of business now but it was televised and he got it for his movie. He said it got broken. He said he still has the stone part of it but the glass is gone. He said he had it on display in his house. He said he's not sure what Bruce does with his awards.

  Howard said it would be kind of cool if Bruce tells them that he had this wobbly table and he used the medal of freedom to keep it from rocking.

• Traveling Into The City And Visiting Mom. 10/31/22. 7:30am
  Howard said on Sunday it was like a military operation going into the city. He said it must have taken him 2 hours to get into the city. He said he had it all mapped out. He said he had his dinner ready to eat. He said he had a freezer bag his wife got him. He said he had ice packs and a glass Tupperware with a rubber top on it. He said he had his salad with his turkey meatballs. He said it was a nice meal. He said he was going to eat it in the car but the meatballs were too hard to cut up. He said he didn't eat that in the car. He said he was staring at the freezer bag.

  Howard said he was watching The Invincible cartoon on his iPad. He said it's on Amazon. He said Ralph turned him on to it. He said there's this guy who is a super hero that's really dark.

  Howard said he made a huge doody before he left his house on Sunday. He said he didn't want to doody at his mothers place. He said he was so excited because things were working out for him. He said he had his meals early that day. He said he had his Metamucil and all of that. He said he made magnificent doody. He said it was top notch. He said it was completely empty. He said he looked at it and thought it was a good start to this Bruce thing.

  Howard said he had planned it out going to his mother's. He said he was going to pee there. He said that would hold him until he got to the city. He said he had it all mapped out. He said everything was good. He said he left his mother's around 4:30 or whenever. He said he spent like an hour there. He said he was staring at the bag and wanting to eat his turkey.

  Howard said he was watching this Invincible thing and J.K. Simmons does the voice of the main character. He said he was going through his Bruce stuff and thinking about how much time he needs with him. He said his career is too monstrous. He said if you think about the Beatles and Bruce the Beatles had each other and Bruce had to write on his own.

  Howard said he was kind of annoyed he had to come into the city. He said there was a lot going on. He said he had his snacks packed and his cholesterol medication. Robin said he had to pack a lot. Howard said he was proud that he dint' leave anything at home. He said he and his mother talked and the talk was good. He said it was about 90 percent good and 10 percent bad.

  Howard said he always stays too long with his mother. He said she was talking about her friends and how they had kids who went to Ivy League colleges. He said he knows where she's going when she tells this story. He said they were talking about his friends and how everyone was out of college and getting a career going and getting settled. He said his mom said he didn't do all of that. Howard said she was telling him that the teachers didn't say they saw anything in him. He said he was getting insulted by that. He said he got defensive and said he could have been a good student but he was a bit traumatized. He said she asked what he meant by that. He said the last thing he thought about before going to school was learning. He said it was tough for him that all of his friends left the community in a 6 month period. He said that he talked to her about all of that and she said that he never said anything to them about that.

  Howard said he felt bad or attacking his mother and blaming her for not being a good student. He said she was completely ignorant about it all. He said that she was such a great mom so he told her that. He said she was the one who told him to get out of the advertising job he had. He said she took credit for that and perked right up.

  Howard said he told his mother he had to go. He said then he's at his apartment laying in bed. Robin said he should time when things go bad. Howard said it's about 42 minutes and 30 seconds into the visit. He said he's trying to get pumped up for this interview and then he feels like a moron after spending time with his mom.

  Howard said he was feeling good about his life and career. He said then his mother brings him right down. He said she tells him that she never felt good about herself. He said she was never that bright and she thought it interrupted her life. Howard said he asked her about that. He said she didn't feel like she accomplished anything. He said he asked about that and she didn't want to talk about it. He said he asked her again what it was that she didn't accomplish. She said it was too hard a question. He said then he felt like a moron for asking about it.

  Howard said his mom told a story about his father and she didn't finish it. He said it's just weird. He said he wanted to tell her that dad hated him but he didn't want to bum her out. He said she's 95. He said he's an old man himself and he has to get over it. He said his mom floored him when she asked why he didn't tell her that he was upset his friends moved away. He said she had to have see that going on.

  Howard said he left there wobbling. He said he was leaving and someone asked if he as Howard Stern. He said no. He said he was in no mood to talk to anyone. He said that was him and normally he would say hi. He said he had just been through a major battle so he's sorry for that.

  Howard said he told the woman he was Rhea Pearlman. He said that she believed him. He said she thought he was much taller than Rhea. He said he just plays much shorter on TV. He said he does love Rhea and her husband Danny DeVito. He said they're New Jersey people too. Robin said she has seen Danny on the train.

  Howard said he was in his apartment building and wearing a mask. He said no one else wears on. He said he hates Halloween. He said the have the decorations up in there. He said it makes no sense. He said there was a teacher who put on the Scream mask and scared the kids when they did something wrong.

  Howard said he got in and ate his dinner. He said he went to sleep last night after watching that cartoon. He said he finished that and then watched The Voice. He said that show drives him crazy. Robin said she hasn't seen it in a while. Howard said you have to fast forward through a lot of it. He said it is kind of funny to watch Blake Shelton and Gwen Stefani together. He said they're married and you know they're going home to bang after. He said that Camilla Cabello is cute. He said John Legend is on the show too. He said they fight for people and it's just too much.

  Robin said John Legend isn't a legend if he's doing that show. She said it's tough to see him on that show.

  Howard said he was up at 2 in the morning thinking about this interview. He said he had to get to sleep. He said he won't eat between meals usually but he had to eat something. He said he had some cashews and that knocked him out.

  Howard said he got up this morning so he could doody. He said he had a good one the day before. He said he wanted to make sure he didn't have to go during the interview today. He said it didn't happen but he peed and emptied out. He said he'll pee again before Bruce gets in there. He said he has a big piano in there and a guitar. He said they have acoustic guitars. He said he doesn't see his famous Telecaster in there. He said he's not sure why he plays that and not a Stratocaster. He said he had a Telecaster and that's the less expensive one. He said that's the one you buy if you don't have the money for a Strat.

  Howard asked Fred why he thinks Bruce plays a Telecaster. Fred said he started off with an Esquire that's even cheaper. He said he picked one up in a pawn shop and fell in love with it. He said he liked the way it felt. He said it put another pickup on it.

  Howard said Fred must be going nuts after this. Fred said Howard can retire after this interview. He said it doesn't get any better than this. He said he can't think of another person in the country or world that comes close to this and Howard has interviewed some really major people. He said it's more important that Mick Jagger to him.

  Howard asked what album he thinks is his best. Fred said he thinks the Dark Horse thing. He said that was a tough one for him to write. He said he wrote Born to Run with that one. He said that he wrote some really great songs for that album. He said he's sure Gary has a different opinion on that one. He said he took shit for Lucky Town. He said Human Touch too. He said he thinks he's a great song writer and performer. He said he's just great.

  Gary said he took shit for those albums because the were without the E Street Band. He said he released them at the same time and it was confusing to people.

  Howard asked what the guitar is that Lindsay Buckingham plays. Fred said it's just that one guitar that this one guy makes. He said he can't think of what it is. He said he'd have to look it up. Howard thanked Fred for that. He said you can't go wrong going to Fred. Howard said it only took 40 years to find something to talk to Fred about.

• A Couple Of Phone Calls. 10/31/22. 8:00am
  Howard took a call from a guy who said he touched his first boob yesterday. He said he was making out with a girl and he was able to touch her boob. Howard asked how old he is. The kid said he was 15. Howard said he touched his first boob when he was 13. He said he's not even sure if that's right but he thinks it was around that age. He said it took him a long time to get there.

  Howard asked the kid, Jackson, how it was. Jackson said that it was good. He said they both got aroused. Howard said he doesn't want to talk too much about that stuff with a 15 year old. He said he won't go there with him. He said he doesn't want to get arrested. Jackson said he understands. Howard said he just wants him to know that he beat him by 2 years. Howard said call back in 3 years and he'll talk to him about this. He said write that down and get back to him.

  Howard took a call from Mariann from Brooklyn who was talking about how great Richard Christy's party that he had yesterday. She said she got a guitar pick from Bruce many years ago. Howard said he's going to ask Bruce about that. Mariann was talking over Robin and singing a Bruce song. She was going on and on about how excited she is for Howard today. Howard hung up on her in the middle of a sentence.

  Robin said that Lindsay Buckingham plays a Rick Turner guitar. Howard said that guy is good. He said he's not sure how he does it.

  Howard said he should take a break and get to some more stuff. He said he sees four guitars in there. He said he's excited that Bruce is coming in.

  Howard did a live commercial read and went to break.

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• A New Phony Phone Call. 10/31/22. 8:10am
  After the break they played a Great Pumpkin Beetlejuice bit, a High Pitch Erik ''Hello I Love You'' song parody, a Jimmy Kimmel endorsement for Howard running for President and Weezer's ''Buddy Holly.''

  Howard came back and said that when Weezer put this album out Mary Tyler Moore sent the entire band personalized autographed photos of herself. They mentioned her in the song.

  Howard said he wanted to get to some fan mail and this new phony phone call. He said this is Richard in his usual Rusty character. He said he called into this religious show where he conjured up some demons for the show. Howard played the call and the hosts of the show were talking about the devil and his foolishness. They took Rusty's call and Rusty said he had a bible from about 4000 BC. He said it has Book of the Dammed written on the cover. He read some Latin from the book and said when he looked it up online it said it had to do with conjuring up some demons. He changed his voice and had sounds playing as he did his thing. Then the hosts took a call from a priest who wanted to help them with what they had just done. He had sound effects too. The show hung up on him. The hosts took another call and it was Richard as the demons with his voice changed. The hosts were trying to cast him out and praising god.

  Howard said what a battle royale. He said that they won out over the demons. Robin said they just had to say ''By his spirit'' to get rid of the demons.

• Calls, Fan Feedback And More. 10/31/22. 8:20am
  Howard took a call from a guy who said he has a great story about Bruce. Howard said he has a feeling it's going to be long. The guy said not at all. He said Bruce called him on stage during the show and he did ''All Shook Up'' and he changed the song with the band and they went right with him. He said it was crazy. Howard asked the guy about getting up there and how that happened. He said he was in an Elvis outfit. Howard said Elvis did inspire Bruce so that could be true. He said he saw the Elvis movie and the guy sounded like him but he didn't think he looked like him that much. He said the sideburns didn't look that good either. Robin said she felt really bad or Elvis after seeing that movie. Howard said Colonel Tom did take a lot of his money. He said he felt bad for the guy too.

  Howard said there it is with Nick. He asked to hear Nick sing a little bit. Nick went into his Elvis impression and sang some for him. Howard hung up on him. He said it sounded like the guy was getting tased.

  Howard said Bruce was inspired by Elvis. He said he wasn't able to play like him right away so he gave his guitar back. He said that he got into it later on in his life and now we have Bruce.

  Howard said he has so many people on the line. He said people are excited about him being in the studio today. Robin asked why that's exciting. Howard said he's not going to be there tomorrow. He said he'll be out the door as soon as Bruce leaves today. Howard read some comments about the upcoming interview. He said people are making him nervous. He said stop saying it's going to be the best interview ever.

  Howard said he wanted to call Ross Zapin about Bruce since he's a huge fan. He said he called and Ross started in with him. He said he told him not to worry and he's a professional and it'll be fine. Howard said he wondered what the fuck is going on here. He said he knows all of that. He said Ross was giving him a pep talk and that made him more uptight.

  Howard read more fan feedback about this interview. Someone thanked Bruce for getting him back into the studio. Howard said some people were upset with Chris Wilding for saying he's going to get COVID by going to the studio.

  Robin said there are Bruce fans out there who are really crazy for him. She said there are movies written about the fans.

  Howard said the fans wrote in about the game they played with JD. He said people like when the pressure is on JD. Howard said he has his mind made up about stuff. Howard said Jon Blitt asked JD more questions and he has another game to play. He said Jon asked if JD would want Jon Hein or Howard to live. JD said without Howard he'd have no job so he'd have to choose Howard to live and Jon to die.

  Howard said he has Robin or Gary. He asked what JD will say. Robin said she thinks Gary will live. Howard played the clip and JD said he thinks that he'd choose Gary to live and Robin to die.

  Howard asked JD what's going on. JD said he may have picked Robin in another one. Howard played another one where JD was asked to pick Beth or Robin. JD went with Robin on that one.

  Howard said his poor wife. JD said there's a lot of editing in these. He said he was saying he'd rather kill himself. He said Blitt edited that out and said that's not how the game works.

  Howard played another one where JD was asked to pick his mom or Howard. JD went with his mom. Howard asked JD if he really thinks that. He said he has been much better to him than his mother has. He said she moved away from him. JD said stop it. He said that's his mother. Howard said if he kills him he won't have anything. He said his mom gave birth to him but he gave him a life. JD said that's why he wasn't able to answer.

  Howard asked JD to pick again. JD said he isn't doing this again. Howard said he has to choose between his mother or him. JD said he can't do this. Howard said he has to choose. JD said he's going with his mother. Howard said he thinks that if Little Steven was asked the same thing about Bruce he'd pick Bruce. He said that Max Weinberg would do the same thing. He said the fans all say that the pressure is on. JD said if he had to make the choice then he'd have to make it. Howard asked him again who he'd go with. JD said he can't do this. Howard said he sees how he feels about him now.

  Howard took a call from a guy who said he hung out with the bouncers for Bruce back in 1995. He said Bruce came out after a show and he asked for a ride home. He said Bruce told him to get in and he drove him home. Howard asked if he really got a drive home. Howard said he'd never do that. The caller said he got to his apartment and Bruce asked if he had tickets to the show the next night. He said he got his name and wrote it on his bodyguard's arm.

  Howard asked what they talked about in the car during the drive. The caller said he was asking about what kind of music he likes and things like that. He said they just kind of bullshitted. Howard said it sounds like a good conversation. The caller said Bruce is a chill and super good guy. Howard said he was kind of zoning at first but he got caught up in his story. He thanked him for the call.

  Robin said during the pandemic Bruce rode across the country on his motorcycle. She said he ran into some guys on the side of the road and just stopped and hung out with them.

  Howard said someone said Ed Sheeran was on the show and did a cover of Atlantic City. He played some of that performance. Howard said John Legend was in there and did a cover of Dancing in the Dark. He played some of that performance too. He said there are a lot of people who did covers of his songs. Robin said she thinks he like it when people cover his songs. Howard said rightly so. He said he thinks Bruce has a story about David Bowie covering his songs too. He said he sat with him when he recorded. He said he has so much to ask about.

  Howard said he has to take a break to get set up for Bruce. He said maybe he'll hit this tomorrow. He said Clarke Thorell was on the Drew Barrymore show. He said he has to play that. He said K-Rock is now simulcasting 1010 WINS news on the station. He said you have to hear the switch over from music to news. He said it's phenomenal. He said Robin will laugh her ass off over that. He said he has to talk about Scott Shannon retiring too. He said he announced that. He said he has some information he wants to share about that. He said they have a lot to talk about. He said Scott has had an amazing career.

  Howard answered a knock at the door. It was fake William Shatner who wanted to sing a Bruce Springsteen song. He said he can do any cover. He said he wanted to do Born in the USA. Howard had him do a little bit of that before letting him go. He was doing the song very slow just like the real Shatner might do it.

  Howard said he savors every word. Bill said you have to. He kept going with the song. Howard said he's the master of the pause. Bill was telling a story but Howard closed the door on him. He said he has to get to the Scott Shannon stuff and more tomorrow. He said there's a lot to discuss.

  Howard took a call from a fake caller who had a Bruce story to tell. He said that Bruce breast fed his baby for 20 minutes when he broke down on the side of the road. Howard hung up on that guy. He went into a live commercial read and went to break.

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• Bruce Springsteen Visits. 10/31/22. 8:50am
  After the break they played a ''Cooking with Tan Mom'' bit, The Beatles ''Rain'' and a phony phone call the guys made to a guy with clips of Robin asking if his refrigerator was running and he had better go catch it. They also played Joe Cocker's ''With a Little Help From My Friends'', a Bobo tip for asking questions on the Howard Stern Show and The Rolling Stones ''Can't You Hear Me Knocking.''

  Howard came back and said Bruce Springsteen is sitting just a few inches from him and he's star struck. Bruce laughed. Howard said Bruce is too much. Bruce said it's funny to him. He said happy Halloween. Howard said he can't stand Halloween. Bruce said when he lived in Rumson he used to have an insane front yard. He said thousands of people would come on Halloween. He said it was pretty crazy. Howard asked how that didn't become a thing. Bruce said it did. He said that's why they don't do it now. He said they did it for a while and one night 4,000 people showed up. He said he saw the street and it was insane. He said he figured that someone was going to end up getting killed in the street so he stopped doing it about 10 years ago.

  Howard said this morning he was thinking about all the awards he won. He asked if that's important to win. Bruce said he doesn't put too much into it. He said he never won Best Album. He said that around the time of Born to Run they weren't giving out Best Album. He said that he may have missed the window for that kind of thing. He said he never won Album of the year.

  Howard said they were thinking about the gold records and awards and what he does with them. Bruce laughed. He said he used to give them all to his mother. He said she kept them in her garage. He said she loved them. He said he has it all in a warehouse now. He doesn't have that stuff in his house.

  Howard asked if he saved all of the stuff he wrote for lyrics. Bruce said he did. He said he keeps that all in a storage unit. He said he's a hoarder along with Patti. He said they keep it all around. He said he has kept stuff since 1975 with the things he has written. Howard asked what he's going to do with it. Bruce said it's a lot of pages of scribbling. He said then you come up with Born to Run. He said the books are full of that kind of stuff. He said he'll have an archive center in Monmouth college to look at it some day. He said that it's not for him. He said it's for other people.

  Howard said Bruce looks fabulous for his age. He said some people look like they're in shock after getting surgery. He said Bruce hasn't done that. Bruce said it can look a little strange. Howard said he thinks he's in pretty good shape. Bruce laughed again. He said he thinks he looks pretty good there.

  Howard asked if he takes Metamucil like he does. Bruce said he does not do that. Howard asked what he does to maintain that look. Bruce said he works out. He said he started in his 30s. He said it's not as much as he used to. He said outside of that he doesn't eat a lot of junk food.

  Howard said he goes for a long time doing shows. He asked if he talks to his therapist about why that is. Bruce laughed and said he has. Howard said he does a radio show and he can't take a break. He said he doesn't want to take breaks. He said he knows why he does it and it's a bit of sickness. Bruce said it is all about the sickness. He said he used to play 5 sets a night. He said that they do 2 or 3 now. He said that he will play 3 hours and something wont go right and he'd kill himself and beat the hell out of himself. He said he'd get in the bus and he'd be upset about what happened. He said he kind of wants to get a handle on it. He said he has a problem stoping. He said it was a purification kind of thing for him. He said he was a church going guy and he had to clean up his mind and a certain amount of that is good for you. He said that if you go into it too much it can take you over. He said he wanted his work to be his work and pleasure and not for it to be his master. He said that he created rituals of purification and he had to get out of them.

  Howard asked if he still beats himself up if he screws something up. Bruce said he does. He said he would hold on to it until the next show and he'd be determined to get it right. He said the band had to follow him into the breach and they had to do 3-4 hour shows.

  Howard said Jimmy Iovine told him that Bruce was insane when they recorded an album. He said it was obsessive compulsive almost. Bruce said it was. He said he directed most of that to his work. He said that when he was young he was able to channel some of his negative characteristics into his work. He said he was a perfectionist. He said a lot of it had good things come from it. He said their show is still one of the best. He said that when you're into the 10th hour of writing something he'll go to the 12th or 15th hour to get it right. He said he'll do the same thing with the show.

  Howard said he went to see his Broadway show a couple of times. He said it was phenomenal. He said he talks about how he saw Elvis and he inspired him to get into music. Howard said even in his book he never said when he got into the guitar so much that he became a professional. Bruce said he started in 1964 at the age of 14. He said that he painted a woman's house and did some other work to make enough money to buy a guitar. He said he got that at Western Auto where they sold some cheat instruments. He said his cousin Frankie showed him his first few chords. Howard said he didn't get caught up in it and think about becoming a composer. He said it must dawn on him at some point to just practice. Bruce said that they bought a 45 and you turned the speed down to 33 and you could hear the guitar note for note. He said you could hear slow note over slow note. He said that's how they learned. He said that he did that with thousands of records.

  Howard said Bruce spent his childhood learning guitar and then piano too. Bruce said his aunt had a piano and she gave him a key to her house so he could go play any time. He said he'd sit there and transfer what he was learning from guitar to piano. He said he taught himself piano. Howard said he seems to be a savant. Bruce said he doesn't think so. Howard said he got the chills hearing him tinkering on his guitar. He said he never even took a lesson. He said it's weird. Bruce said he's southern Italian and they're musical. He said that he's third generation American on his Italian side. He said he's like second generation on his mother's side. He said he has an innate music ability because of that. He said that he didn't know he had it in him until he started to play. He said he was able to play in a band in town not long after picking up the guitar. He said he was obsessed with it. He said he spent time with the guitar whenever he had free time. He said it was everything to him. He said it's an enormous part of his day even today.

  Howard asked if his father took any interest in his guitar playing. Bruce said not right away. He said that it's not common to have a career in that. He said in 1964 thousands of people picked up a guitar and then it goes down from there for getting into a band and making a record and all of that. He said that just a few people out of those people went on to have anything to do with music as time went by. He said he was the one out of that group that ended up on that stage that night. He said it was as shocking to him as anyone else. He said he put the time into it but it's also the ability and luck that came into it.

  Howard asked if he ever thinks about a song being awful. Bruce said that he has had some bad songs. He said he knew that Rosalita had a great riff. Howard asked where he was when he wrote that. Bruce said he was living in a surfboard factory when he wrote that. He said he had a song called Thunder Crack that had complicated chord changes too. He said he remembers coming up with that stuff.

  Howard said he used to put on Rosalita when he had to take a break at WRNW. He said that song is so up his alley. He said from what he read into it it's about a girl he dated and her mother was horrible to him. He said it was basically a fuck you. He asked what the process is where he writes a song. He asked if he has the riff first. Bruce said he was in love with this girl in high school and her mother couldn't stand him. He said it was a cliché story. He said she was going to get a restraining order against him. He said he was dangerous to her kid. He said he was the least dangerous kid in his high school. Bruce started to sing some of the song and told Howard how he was coming up with the lyrics. Then he just played the song and just kept going for a bit.

  Howard said he must have been a very literate kid to come up with those kind of lyrics. He said they're not simple lyrics. He asked if he was a well read student. Bruce said not at all. He said he was a creation of top 40 radio. He said by the time FM came around he was already playing. He said that was in 67 or 68. He said he was absorbing the music he heard on top 40. He said he was into that and nothing else. He said once it got in there.

  Howard said what he did at the Kennedy Center Honors was amazing. He said he did that Bob Dylan song and that was amazing. He said he's not that into Dylan but that was awesome. Bruce said Bob requested that so he did it for him. Howard said that's not too much pressure. Bruce said he owes him so much. He said that he was the foundation for the poetic side of his lyrics. He sang some Dylan for Howard. He said he lived on that kind of stuff. He said he took the idea of the way he was doing it and brought it into pop music. He said Blinded by the Light was totally him tripping on Bob Dylan. Howard asked him to talk about that song.

  Howard said Bruce was under a lot of pressure to come up with a hit song. Bruce said he did an album and he was told nothing he had was playable on the radio. He said he went home and went to the beach and wrote that song and another. He said it was just about rhyming the words. He said he actually wrote the lyrics first for Blinded by the Light. He demonstrated how he wrote that song by playing guitar and singing a bit of the song.

  Bruce said that was just him having fun. He said that he wrote about things that were in his life but it was total nonsense. Howard said he should be able to do something like that.

  Howard asked Bruce if he was excited that his song that was covered by Manfred Man has a hit. Bruce said a lot of people had hits with his music that he didn't have hits with. Howard asked if he's honored by that or not. He said you'd think he'd be bitter. Bruce said he always loved it. He said whenever someone covers your song you're flattered.

  Howard asked about Bowie covering some of his songs. He said he went and watched him record the songs Saint in the City and Growing Up. Bruce said he was cutting the Young Americans album and he had one album out. He said though Columbia they asked him to go into the studio with Bowie. He said he was a big fan. He said that he took the bus to Philadelphia and went to the studio. He said David was a real sweet guy. He said he was a complete nobody at the time and David was a big supporter. He said it was a nice thing.

  Howard said he thought the Bono speech was great when he was inducted into the Hall of Fame. Howard said he talked about how he managed to avoid a lot of mistakes that other rock stars make. Howard asked what his hobbies are. Bruce said his sister got him into photography. He said he won't ever have a show. Howard asked if his sisters were envious of him. Bruce said they were pretty proud. He said they will make fun of you but he's fine with that. He said he has some great sisters.

  Howard said when he sold his catalog he didn't believe it. He said he didn't think that he'd allow his music to be used by someone without his permission. Bruce said he got to a point in his life where he figured it was time. He said he's 73 now and he figured Columbia would be a good place to leave it. Howard said it's a good sense of cashing in too. Howard said it's weird. He said that he did it out of pure joy. Bruce said he got paid a fortune for something he would have done for free. Howard asked if he would ever retire. Bruce said he can't imagine that. He said look at Johnny Cash and Pete Seeger. He said that Pete was 91 or 92 and sang This Land is Your Land. He said that he may not be doing 3 hours shows the rest of his life but he could keep going the rest of his life doing something. He said he can't imagine retirement.

  Howard said he saw his Broadway show and figured everyone would do one now. He said it hasn't happened. Bruce said it was very hard to do. He said it's not an easy thing. He said it just happened by accident. He said he got asked to play at the White House and he went there and played some acoustic songs. He said he read from his book too. He said he spent an afternoon or two coming up with a show. He said it was about 90 minutes of what the Broadway show became. He said Patti told him it was good and Obama came up to him and said they should turn that into a show. He said shortly thereafter he added about a half hour to it and that became the show he did on Broadway. He said it happened by accident almost.

  Howard asked if he enjoyed doing the show. Bruce said he did. He said that the enjoyed it every single night he did it. He said he did about 200 shows. Howard said he loves it when he comes out with his wife and sings. He said it's so great. Bruce went over to the piano to play something. Howard asked if he does the same thing when he tinkers. Bruce said he might. He said he plays the opening of Thunder Road.

  Bruce said to get Patti in there it may take some sweet talking. He said she's Sicilian and she has a long memory. Howard said he has a lot to apologize for. He said he really appreciates him coming in today.

  Howard asked Bruce how he comes up with a song like ''Tougher than the Rest.'' He asked if he sits in the room by himself and writes it down. Bruce said you need a good title first. He said you need that or a metaphor. He said that title was a good start. He said he's starting out with something that he can dig into. He told Howard how he came up with someone to sing about and how he came up with the song. Then he broke into the song on the piano. He explained what he had for the guy he's singing about. He continued the song and performed almost the whole song. He said this is about a guy selling himself.

  Howard said there are certain moments in the song where it gives him chills. He asked if he gets that. Bruce said that's how he knows if he has something. He said if he can do it for himself then he knows he has something for you. He said that's how he judges what he's doing. Howard said it's magnificent.

  Howard asked Bruce how he knows so much about love. He said his father was a difficult man. He said he loves what he said about him being his greatest hero and his greatest foe. He said he knows that feeling. He said his father made him feel like nothing. He asked how you have any gas in the tank to love someone when you were denied love by your father. Bruce said that was really hard to figure out. He said he went into therapy at the age of 32. He said he had some success and he felt his inner body clock ticking. He said he had his manager to help him find a therapist. Howard asked how he knew to take a rolling stone reporter and make him a manager. Bruce said you can learn trust. He said he trusted John Landau. He said he loved the guy and the guy loved him. He said they had a deep sense of trust. Howard asked if he's the father he never had. Bruce said he's not quite that old but he did play the role of a mentor. He said that when they started he was very important to him in his life and his work.

  Howard asked if he knew to go out and find mentors or did he look for people who didn't know. Bruce said he had a lot of mentors in his life. He said he went out and found them as soon as his parents left. He said they left in 1969. He said he stayed in New Jersey and they went to California. He said he was meeting a lot of people and he had one guy who took him under his wing. He said he was about 10 years older than him. He said he worked in a factory with him for a few years. He said he traveled with this guy Tinker for years. He said they noticed his talent and said he was worth something and the wanted to invest in him. He said they saw something in him. He said these are people who did that. He said he had another guy who opened their doors and let him and his band set up and play. Howard said its very generous for people to do that. Bruce said they are the unsung heroes of the music world.

  Howard asked if he does that for struggling artists. Bruce said a little bit but not too much. He said if he sees someone.

  Howard asked Bruce about the loving family thing and how he must have had some anger issues. Bruce said yeah. Howard said he must not even know what love is. Bruce said some kids had parents who told them they were the second coming and then they had one who said they were worthless. He said we're all mama's boys and they had this imbalance in their lives. He said that you go out in the world and try to validate yourself. He said he didn't have the ability to fall in love with someone and he was too frightened to do it. He said he wanted to figure out how he could do that and stay and say ''I'll be here.'' He said he had to figure that out. Howard said he wasn't able to get there yet. Bruce said you have to take your mind there and hope that your ass will follow. He said you have to imagine that person first and then get there. He said you have to learn the skills to become that person. He said that's where some people run out of luck. He said to learn the skills of loving he didn't understand he had to work on that like he worked on guitar.

  Howard asked how much work it took. Bruce said he had to learn that he could be committed. He said he got married at 34 and that lasted 3 years. He said the divorce was pretty devastating. He said that was important for him in a learning way.

  Howard asked how long it took for Patti to trust him and get into it with him. Bruce said he thinks that clock is still ticking. He said they were both outsiders. He said she was living like he was living. He said they sort of made that promise to one another. He said they wanted to make it work and they did things to make sure it would work. He said they've been together for 33 or 34 years now. Howard said it's an inspiration.

  Howard said he read his book and he talked about how he would go to the bar to get his father out of there. He said that it's very hard to give a loving relationship to anyone. Bruce said his father was not giving and the signals he got from him about what it was to be a man didn't work. He said that his father wasn't able to give of himself. He said he learned lessons from him and he learned that's not who he wanted to be. He said his father never told him to be a musician or anything. He said they wanted him to be a doctor or lawyer or something like that. He said they were surprised when he called them from Asbury Park and said he was signed to a record label. He said his mother asked if he changed his name because here was no way Bruce Springsteen would work. Howard asked if he had any pressure to change his name. Bruce said they went with that name pretty well so they didn't ask him to change it.

  Howard said he's a great song writer. He said he thinks about the Beatles and how they had each other to toss ideas off of. He said Bruce wrote all of these songs himself. He asked if he ever got jealous of bands that wrote together. Bruce said he was turned into a loner by the way he grew up. He said he was his own best company. He said he wanted to be fully independent. He said he wanted to do it all. He said he went up to CBS with a guitar and he played for them by himself. He went back to his guitar and picked it up to play for Howard. He said he thought about what to play for this guy up there. He said he knew where he was going and who he was going to be playing for. He said the worst thing that could happen is he comes out the same person he is. He said he had nothing to lose. He said he almost convinced himself that was true. He said John Hammond was there and he was all dressed up with his feet up on the desk. He said he knew who he was and he wasn't a corporate guy. He said he was an old school artist kind of guy. He said he asked him to play something so he played this. He broke into the song that he played for the guy. He said the guy said ''you have to be on Columbia records'' when he heard that. He said he was living in a sleeping bag on his buddy's floor at the time.

  Howard said he has to be thankful to them for picking him up at that time. Bruce said he was 22 at the time and he was playing everywhere he could. He said he played a thousand nights. Howard said he was able to play so well and he had done it a lot of times. Bruce said he never knew if he'd ever make a record. He said he played for a lot of people and heard a lot of applause before going into Hammond's office.

  Howard asked how he knew what to do in the recording studio. Bruce said he didn't. He said he just went up to the microphone and started singing. He said that's all he knew to do. Howard asked if he was nervous about the way things work. Bruce said he did a teste with Hammond in the studio. He said then he went into the studio with his producer. He said they waned him to do just him and his guitar but he wanted his band on with him. He said he was able to get the rhythm section on with him. He said this was the day of the singer songwriter so they wanted him to do something by himself. He said they didn't even know he played with a band at the time. Howard said it's so great when it's just him and a guitar. Bruce said if he has a good song he should be able to play it with just his guitar. He said you can get more nuance out of it. He said even on big productions. He said he can play Born to Run even by himself. Howard had him do a little bit of that for him. Bruce did some of that and said if the song is written well you should be able to do that.

  Howard asked if that song was his do or die. He asked if he looks back on that one and thanks the song. Bruce said it was. He said that song is one that people identify him with. He said that it comes at the end of the night. He said he doesn't get tired of playing it.

  Howard asked if he still writes every day. Bruce said no. He said he doesn't have something to say every day. He said he waits for the songs to come along to him now. Howard asked when they come to him. Bruce said they can come in the shower. Howard asked if he has a song in his head every day. Bruce said no. He said years will go by with nothing. Howard asked if he believes in god. Bruce said he does and he does a lot of praying. He said he has no idea if he'll write another song.

  Howard said Billy Joel won't write anymore because he looks at the piano keys as shark teeth trying to bite him. He asked if Bruce feels that way. Bruce said not really. He said it's not that hard for him. He said that he wrote for the band and he knew what he wanted to write about with the last one. He said he wrote ''Letter to You'' and he wanted to write about what it was like being in a rock band at his age. He said this guy had passed away and he was in his first band and it got him thinking. He said he thinks he wrote ''Last Man Standing'' like that. He sang some of that song for Howard. He said his buddy was passing away from cancer and he saw him the last few days he was alive. He said he came back home and then a week goes by and this song comes to him.

  Howard said that's amazing. He asked if he went to see Clarence Clemons when he was dying and he passed away with him strumming the guitar to him. Bruce said that's right. He said that he wasn't able to hear him but he was able to squeeze your hand. He said he had a hunch that he might be able to understand. He said he knew he was going to die so he just strummed a song called Land of Hope and Dreams. Howard asked why he chose that. Bruce said it's about passing over to the other side. He said it's about life and death. He went over to another guitar and said he'll try to remember how that one went. He told Howard the tuning this guitar had ready to go. He said he has The Rising and this song in that tuning.

  Howard asked Bruce about how it went with Clarence. Bruce said there were some relatives in the room at the time. He said his nephew may have been there. He said there were a few people but it was a tiny space. He said it was just this. He played the song for Howard. He forgot some of the song. He said it's a hymn.

  Howard asked if he knew he'd sing that to him or did it just come to him. Bruce said it was just something they had worked on together. He said it's probably one of his best songs in the past 20 or 30 years.

  Howard said when you write something like that do you play it for someone like Patti. He asked if he just records it into something. Bruce said he'll play it for Patti or John. He said John is his first audience. He said that John was his first of a certain type of fan. He said that if it reads for John and him then it's a good consensus that they have something there.

  Howard said John Landau wrote that he has seen the future of rock and roll and it was Bruce.

  Howard said he's not a fan of sax but he made it work in his songs. Bruce said a lot of people don't like horns.

  Howard said Bruce put an ad in the paper saying ''No Ginger Baker Wannabes Need Apply'' when he was looking for new band members. Bruce said they weren't playing that kind of music at the time. He said he was creating a band that was a cross between Elvis and Buddy Holly's band and James Brown's band. He said he was looking for a band that was a unified sound.

  Howard said when he had Clarence working on Jungleland he had him there for 16 hours. He said that must people would have walked out on that. Bruce said you have to find someone who has nothing else to do.

  Howard asked if they usually did recording quickly. Bruce said they spent hours in the studio working on stuff. He said that they didn't do it quickly. He said they spent many days on one song in the late 70s and 80s. He said he threw away every time in recording studios. He said in 1982 he had about $32,000 to his name and he lost it to recording studios. He said they don't do that anymore but at that point he didn't know where he was going with it. He said that sax solo was supposed to be a guitar solo. He said that Clarence started to play and he went on for 16 hours trying to get it right. He said he worked on that for 16 hours. He said he'd get a few notes and then switch tracks. He said that's how that solo was created.

  Howard asked Bruce how he came up with the Jungleland. Bruce said he can't play it anymore. He said he forgets how to. He said he heard Charlie Puth doing it recently. He said he can really play it. Bruce said he can't play it anymore. He played a few things for Howard on piano and went into some Thunder Road.

  Howard said he finally got him to cry on the air. He asked why it was that piano. Bruce said his aunt gave it to him. He said that he had that junky piano that he played and that was his keyboard.

  Howard asked if he has a favorite song he ever wrote. Bruce said he has a lot. He said he likes Darkness on the Edge of Town, Born to Run, Thunder Road, Born in the USA, the songs on the Nebraska album and a lot of the songs on Letter to You. He said he has a lot of songs. He said there's The Rising too. He said he likes the guitar for that.

  Howard asked what comes to mind when he's asked about The Rising. Bruce said on September 11th he was on the shore and he can see Manhattan from where he was at. He said he had a clear view north to lower Manhattan. He said you could see the Trade Centers. He said he was in shock like everyone was. He said this guy yelled out to him and said ''Hey Bruce, we need you!'' He said he did go home after that. He said he didn't know how he could help.

  Howard said when someone says that it's like he's a New Jersey Superman. He asked if he went home and wrote. Bruce said he did. He said he felt so powerless in the face of the events of that day. He said over that next week he was fooling around with the tunings and came up with this song. He started to play The Rising.

  Howard said that's magnificent. He said his voice has gotten even stronger. He said that's a blessing too. He said he must worry about his hands and voice. Bruce said his voice has gotten better. He said that he hasn't been a drinker or a smoker so that helps. He said he doesn't go to a vocal coach or anything either. He said he sang correctly and he has no idea why. He said he had a naturally healthy technique. He said he can sound really loud or soft. He demonstrated how he can get really loud.

  Howard asked how his hearing is. Bruce said it's bad. He said he has to use hearing Aids. He said that Patti will ask if he can't hear a fucking thing or what.

  Howard said he has a very crisp sound out of his guitar. He said he is able to pick very well. Howard asked if he thinks that he's a good guitar player. Bruce said he does. He said his playing is underrated. He said he started out as a lead guitarist. He said he made a living being a lead guitarist. He said he would play at parties and stuff and he made a living doing that. He said he did plenty of Ginger Baker'ing and stuff when he was coming up.

  Bruce said that he had to have an operation on his neck when his fingers started going numb. He said that he had some of his disks operated on. He said he wasn't able to sing for 3 months after that operation. He said when he was ready to sing again he went into his garage and sang some stuff. He sang the songs he was trying out that day. He said by the time he got to the end he was singing loud. He said once he got to that note he knew he'd be okay.

  Howard asked what he did with the Rolling Stones. Bruce said he did Tumbling Dice. He said it was great.

  Howard said this guy Tom Morello is great. He said he did The Ghost of Tom Joad. Bruce said he and Tom have this mind meld and he's an amazing guy. He said Tom was coming to the concerts with his sister Pam. He said he wasn't sure that they could cross paths musically but he invited him out to sound check and they tired to figure something out. He said that's how they came up with that version of The ghost of Tom Joad. He said it was epic. He said he's an epic guitar player.

  Howard said he always thought the Traveling Wilburys was great. He asked if Bruce would ever form a super group like that. Bruce said he would like to play with someone like John Fogarty and guys like that. He said he has played with Neil Young too. He said he loves Neil. Howard said that guy is very prolific as well. He said he will go off and write a song in the woods for 20 minutes and come up with a very important song. He said that's sort of what Bruce did with The Rising. Bruce said you do what you can. He said you write what you can. He said he may go home and wonder if he has something to say anything about something like September 11th. He said he doesn't know but he wrote a prayer about it. He said that's all he knew what to do at that time. He said that's probably one of his better songs in the past 20 or 30 years. He said it's really just luck when it all comes down to it. He said there's always something going on that you don't understand.

  Howard asked if there are any songs of his that are very hard for him to play. Bruce said that all of his songs are easy to play. He said they're all four chords and the truth. Howard said Keith Richards said he will remove a string and reinvent guitar playing. Bruce said that's a great tuning. He said that he can't do it with his guitar. He played a little bit of ''Start Me Up.'' He said that's the kind of tuning you get with a 5 string set up.

  Howard asked what it's like at his house. Bruce said they have a big Italian family said they have a lot of visitors. Howard asked if he hated Los Angeles. Bruce said he liked riding his motorcycle and things like that. Howard asked if he fears riding at all. Bruce said he had a bad one early on and he could have died because he didn't have a helmet on. He said he still rides but not as much. He said he's just getting older now. He said he's not riding as much now though.

  Howard asked what hobbies he has. Bruce said it's mostly just music. He said he will spend days just recording at home in his studio. Howard asked if he brings in an engineer. Bruce said he has a full time engineer. He said the last record he made is full of covers. Howard said they should talk about that. Bruce said he can just gather songs and record and see what catches fire. He said he has been making another one since then. He said he still loves singing and playing so that's his hobby.

  Howard said he didn't think that he would be a Commodores fan. Bruce said he is. He said that song is a great one. Howard said the album is ''Only The Strong Survive'' and it's available November 11th. Howard said it must be weird to promote a new album. Bruce said you have to make the audience care about your obsessions and Martin Scorsese said once. He said that's what he has to do.

  Howard said Bruce said that his life has been a life long conversation with his audience. He said that's a nice way to look at it. He said that's basically what he's doing. Bruce said you have to change but then people say you changed and they get upset with you. He said they didn't change but you did.

  Howard said you have to accept that you've changed. He said some people wont' be there with you when you do another album. Bruce said back in 1987 he did Tunnel of Love and people said they wanted him to sing about girls and cars. He said that some people go by the wayside. He said that's the way things go. Howard said you can change and maybe your audience should change. Bruce said he had to change or he'd have no life. He said he wouldn't have had kids or a love life. He said he had to change to have kids and to parent them. He said he had to be reasonably responsible. He said he had to learn to be responsive to someone he was in love with and he just had to call Patti to let her know if he wasn't coming home that night. He said he looks back on that stuff and wonders what he was thinking.

  Howard said he had to change to make his kids the stars of his life. Bruce said he did. He said that the kids don't come to see the show. He said seeing 50,000 people cheer your parents is weird. He said it's unnatural. He said every one of the kids was different with that kind of stuff. He said you don't bring it home. He said they never brought it into the house.

  Howard said you must want the kids to see you being praised. Bruce said you do but then you realize they need a dad. He said they will find their own heroes. He said they should. He said they don't need more heroes. He said they need a ride to someone's house or something like that. He said once you figure that out things will work out. He said it takes a lot of narcissism to do his job. He said they grew out of that. He said Patti is his bullshit detector. He said she will tell him not to bring that into the house. He said 99.9 percent of the time she's right. He said it's heartbreaking to see people who don't get it together. He said the whole rock and roll death cult was bullshit when it came down to living.

  Howard said he's glad that he's still going out on tour and keeping this alive. He said there's not many people doing this now. He said it feels like rock is gone in a way. He said in his day there was nothing more important. Bruce said that they have to share things with video games and other things out there. He said they came up in a golden age for what they did. He said if you're a young guy playing a guitar in 1967, 75 or 85, you came up in a time that no one ever imagined. He said that his first contract was one of the first of the last where you didn't get paid. He said he had 10 years of that. He said they were lucky they came up and got paid eventually. He said he wouldn't want to be starting out now. He said it's just a different world. Bruce said that his daughter played the new Taylor Swift album in the car ride from the airport back home and it was good. He said that's what he likes to see. He said there's still a lot of great work going on out there. He said things are just going to be different now.

  Howard played some of Bruce's new album. He played his cover of ''Nightshift.'' Howard asked if this is hard to do. Bruce said he did an album and threw the whole thing out. He said he still will do that sometimes. He said he picked songs he loves and put them all together for this album. He said it's a lot of fun. He said it's fun to be able to do great songs like that.

  Howard said his head is spinning from this morning. He said he had an incredible time. Robin said she hopes Bruce had a great time too. Bruce said he did. Howard said he is a gift to the world. He said hearing his process is great. He said he has had an amazing life. Bruce said he has been blessed. He said thanks for being so great to him. Robin said that you have to delve into what it's like to be Bruce Springsteen. She said he's out at the beach club. Howard said he was very consumed with him. He said he stopped by to see his 95 year old mom yesterday. Bruce said his mom is 97. Howard said his dad just died at 99 this summer. He said he felt like he missed out on a life together. He said he didn't have a lot of pride in him. He said he was like what Bruce said about being his greatest hero and his greatest foe. Bruce said his dad had a pretty peaceful last 10 years of his life. He said he would sit at the kitchen table and he pulls out his Oscar and puts it between them. He said he just puts it there and his dad sits there for a minute and he said he will never tell anyone what to do ever again. Howard said maybe that was like ''Finally I've won your love.'' Bruce said he was finally not a loser.

  Howard said the theory he had about him is that his father was the blue collar guy that he wrote his music about. Bruce said he's right. He said that was it. He said if he can't get his love he will become him. He said he'll be close to him that way. Howard said he feels his parents sadness. He said he only felt their stuff. Bruce said he was so impacted by his dad's pain that all he knew was that when he picked up the guitar he had to write about that. He said he was his agent in the world. He said he wasn't sure what agent that was but he was his agent in the world.

  Howard said his mother used to say he was her representative. He said he has no idea what for. Howard said he has to pish so he's sure that Bruce has to as well. Bruce said he does. Howard gave him a plug for his album and started to wrap up. He gave him a plug for the E Street Radio channel there as well. Howard thanked him again for coming in. He said later today he will be handing out Halloween candy to half of New Jersey.

  Howard said thanks again. Robin said Howard needs 17 days with him. Bruce said he knows he finally got there and he'll come back any time. Howard gave him more plugs and ended the interview. They were done around 11:20am.

• Back Home - Recapping The Springsteen Interview. 11/01/22. 7:00am
  Howard started the show talking about how they used to play this song The Great American Nightmare on terrestrial radio and he's not sure if they had to bleep the ''mother fucker'' in it. Robin said she thought they played it there. Fred said there was an edit that was safe to use.

  Howard said he had to go 4 hours home after the Bruce interview yesterday. He said he doesn't miss that commute. He said he had to call Fred after the show. He said he was reveling in having him on the show. He said he wanted to call Fred and bond with him. He said he hasn't called him in years. He said he got his voicemail. He said he didn't leave a message. Fred said he tried calling back but it kept ringing. Howard said he didn't have his ringer on. Howard said he tried calling again but he didn't pick up. He said he almost talked to Fred yesterday. He said it hasn't happened in 35 years. He said he had the urge and then he missed his call. Fred said they have to have Springsteen back on so he can get another call.

  Howard said he was wondering what Fred was thinking about Bruce picking up his guitars and playing piano. Fred said he was so good at explaining what he was all about. He said a lot of rock and rollers just get up and hack around. He said Bruce is so planned out. He said it was very impressive. He said anyone who is a musician should listen and just do what he does. He said he was so driven.

  Howard said it was impressive to hear the amount of work he puts in. He said he takes it very seriously. Robin said he's not just diddling around on the keys or strings. She said he's after something.

  Fred said he was talking about the songs and he would come right out of the song like he's doing a radio show. He said it was so impressive.

  Howard said his guitar playing is so crisp and clear. Fred said that's why his songs are so good. He said he's playing it all on guitar. He said he just has the guys follow along. He said that's why it's so good.

  Howard said he was listening to some of the tunes he was playing. He said that all caught him by surprise. He said he had a conversation a few weeks ago and Bruce asked what songs he wanted to hear. He said he had a list of about 25 songs. He asked Jon Hein if he has that list. Jon said he does. Howard said he had so many songs that he had picked and when he came in Gary said that Bruce said he can ask him about any of the songs and he'll play them. He said no one ever does that. He said yesterday's interview with Bruce couldn't have been better. He said if you could sit with people who have influenced society it would have been great. He said he feels like he got to do that with Bruce. He said it couldn't have gone better. He said he was hoping for 2 songs and he got a lot more than he thought he was going to get.

  Howard said it couldn't have gone better. Robin said Bruce went back and made sure he could recall all of the songs he wanted to talk about. Howard said he was listening to some of the songs he was doing and it was so good. Howard played some of those songs.

  Howard said he had never heard the song explained like he did. He said the song ''Tougher Than The Rest'' was about a guy who was telling a woman that he'll be there for you. He said it was captivating. He played more of that song.

  Howard said one of the fans wrote him about that song. He said the tears were flowing hearing that song. Robin said the whole thing was full of feeling. She said you felt it.

  Howard read more feedback about that song. People were really feeling a lot with that performance. Howard said the thing that really got him was when he was talking about Clarence Clemons. He said Bruce talked about playing a song for him in the hospital as he was dying and he played this. Howard played the song, Land of Hope and Dreams, that Bruce said he played in the hospital. Robin said this one really got her.

  Howard said one fan wrote in about that song saying that if you're not in tears you're not human. He had a few comments about that song and people were very emotional about that one.

  Howard said poor Clarence wanted Robin sexually and she never gave in. Robin said she could have been there with Bruce. Howard played a clip of Clarence sweet talking Robin many years ago. Robin said Bruce also had pearls of wisdom during the interview. She said one of them was when they were talking about being in a relationship and knowing how to be a dad when he didn't get love or attention as a child. She said Bruce said you have to be able to imagine it and then you try to figure out how it's done. She said she was thinking about how even in his songs it's visions of possibility.

  Howard said yesterday he was so exhausted when he left the building. He said it was such an emotional day for him. He said he always wanted Bruce on the show. He said he wanted it but this was the right moment in time to have him on. He said years ago it wouldn't have been. He said that's for a bunch of reasons. He said all of the reasons having to do with his condition. He said it was a day when Bruce said he wanted to sit in the studio with him. He said he hadn't been in the studio in 2 and a half years or so. He said he got up early and came into the city. He said he hadn't even been there in a long time. He said he spent the night there and spent the night thinking about Bruce. He said the anticipation was killing him. He said he had already imagined the interview over and over in his head. He said all the preparation and talking to Jon Hein was a lot. He said he just wanted to talk to him. He was hoping he wouldn't get sick and all of that. He said he was thinking that the interview was going to happen on Wednesday but he wanted to do it on Monday. He said he wanted to do it then so he could make it happen already. He said he couldn't wait any longer.

  Howard said he was wondering how to do the show and what time it was going to start. Robin said Howard wasn't even sure about when the show was going to start. Howard said he didn't want people to be confused. He said on the days they have a guest he is focused on being funny and doing the show and then he has to switch gears and get to an interview. He said he didn't even know what the fuck it was going to be. He said he hadn't been in studio in a long time and they had to check the equipment before. He said there were a lot of details.

  Howard said when he woke up yesterday it was all very emotional. He said that's because he hadn't been there in a while. He said he saw Otis the elevator operator and he hugged him. He said it was really emotional. He said he saw a lot of people he hasn't seen in a long time. He said it was eerie going into the studio too. He said usually the offices are buzzing with people. He said he usually sees people there. He said because of his paranoia they kept everyone out. He said it was like a ghost town. He said he was looking for people and everyone was hiding somewhere. He said it was only essential personnel.

  Howard said it felt weird being in the studio. He said it was beautiful though. He said they have such a nice set up there. He said they gave them a lot of space and he designed the studio of his dreams.

  Howard said radio guys don't get that kind of set up usually. He said he has had studios that he had to share with other guys and things would get messed up. He said even after 2 and a half years everything was the same over there. He said it didn't have to be adjusted too much.

  Howard said he was alone in the studio and it was kind of eerie. Robin said it was almost like a haunted situation on Halloween. Howard said he was very proud of this studio. He said he was proud to show Bruce around. He said he had him there with John Landau and he wanted him to see and have a professional experience. He said he wanted him to have the best experience possible. He said when they left K-Rock it was like a junk yard there. He said he had worked there for years. He said to be there at K-Rock was good enough for him but his mother came to visit once. He said she told him it was terrible and dirty. Howard said he didn't know it was that bad. He said she said they deserve a nice place to work. He said they didn't even know they deserved it. He said they were made to feel that way over there. He said he felt kind of disposable there.

  Howard said when they got there to Sirius they got the opportunity to build their own studio. He said he wanted to work on getting the best professionals in the studio so they sound better than anywhere else. He said their crew is so professional. He said he wrote note to the staff last night about how great they are. He said he knows Bruce appreciates that. He said they have to put that kind of effort into their work. He said he believes that's what they have achieved. He said he thinks that's what they have done.

  Howard said Robin's microphone cut out there. He said here he is talking about their audio quality and Robin loses her microphone. Robin was back and she said that they would hear things in the studio and it was not as good going out on air. Howard said he drove home and listened to the whole thing back. He said he wondered if they had done it justice. He said it turns out they did so that was fabulous.

  Howard said he got into the studio all alone yesterday. He said Gary, Robin and Fred weren't there. He said he looked around and studio looked amazing. He said Bruce's guitars were there and they were well used. He said he was just staring at them. He said he's such a fan of music. He said he's written so many hit songs. He said he was wishing that he could play piano. He said he was looking at all of this and thinking about how he hopes Bruce is in the mood to play. He said you don't know what they're going to do. He said as they got closer to the time he took a break and Bruce came in and said hi and hugged and shook his hand. He said then he Purell'd. He said that kind of calmed him down. He said Bruce went over to the piano to test it out and he starts playing. He asked Gary what he played. Gary said it was the start of Thunder Road. Howard said it was in a very casual way. He said the goose bumps went through him. He said he wished his audience could hear that sound check. He said then Bruce said this is fine. He said he didn't carry on. He said everything was so set up that he didn't need to have a problem with it. He said they had hit a home run there.

  Howard said Bruce did another sound check with the guitars and he was wishing the audience could hear that too. He said he's not sure what he was playing but it was great. Robin said she saw it with no sound. She said she saw him at the piano but didn't hear it. Howard said he was hoping she could hear it. He said that his tech was showing him what he could hear with his headphones. He said he was just going with it. Howard said he wanted to get on air as quick as he could. He said he just interrupted and got into it when he was ready. He said they went right into it. He said he was so blown away with the story he started out with. He said he was talking about the Halloween stuff he used to do an how they had like 4,000 people show up. He said he's not sure how the police didn't show up for that.

  Gary said if he knew about that he would have gone. He said Bruce had a guitar in the green room and he was playing in there. He said it was just great.

  Howard said he didn't have much interaction with anyone there. He said it reminded him of his early days in radio. He said it was like before he had Fred or Robin with him. He said it was pretty magical yesterday. He said he felt so good about everything.

  Robin said Howard has this level of comfort when he talks to guests and it was very intimate. Howard said he loves that performance that he did at the Kennedy Center Honors. He said he broke into the song and he didn't expect that at all. He said he doesn't have that in front of him. He said it was just great that he would do that. He said he broke into The Rising. He said that was great. He played some of that performance.

  Howard said he's sitting there in a room with Bruce and he's showing him how he writes songs. He said he wondered who the fuck he is to be that lucky. He said it was insane. He said this was just too much. He said Gary started crying during this one. Gary said it was such an emotional day in general. He said their kind of experience that day will stick with them. He said this is going to be on his top list of shows. He said the 9/11 show is the number 1 show and this brought him back to that day.

  Howard said he's never going to forget how he felt during this interview. He said this day was something. He said it was fucking mind blowing. He said he has never cried on the air and this guy did that to him. Robin said she loved how he said this was a prayer and that's all he could think of that day. Howard said he was sitting there thinking about how good this was. He said there's something about his voice and the notes he hits. He said he had never had this kind of experience.

  Howard said even the Kennedy Center thing blew him away. He played some of that performance.

  Howard said what was going through his head was thank god for this guy. He said he got to sit with this guy and he moves people. He said that he can sing and play. He said he thinks about Pete Townshend and how talented he is but he doesn't get to sing his own songs. He said Bruce can do it all. He said he was so grateful to him.

  Gary said the songs were amazing but the interview was amazing. He said you've seen him do a lot of things. He said he loved the Broadway show but this was something like that but it's like the audience got to ask questions during the show. Howard said he just wanted to hear that Bruce was happy about what went down.

  Howard said he took pictures with Bruce and he's bummed about them because he looks horrible. He said Bruce was fine with any of them but he can't use any because he looks horrible. Howard said he has really aged. He said he's just gotten old. He said it's depressing to him.

  Gary asked if he thinks he looks older than he did 2 and a half years ago. Howard said yes. Gary said he doesn't though. Robin asked if he looks his age. Howard said his hair is still dark and he doesn't color it. He said that keeps him looking kind of youthful. He said then he saw his picture and it was bad. He said he thinks he looks okay in the mirror. He said Bruce looks great for 73. He said he claims he hasn't had any work done. He said he looks good. Howard said we're all going to get old and look like this. Robin said if you keep poking at it then it doesn't look natural.

  Howard said Gary is a big fan of Springsteen. He said he must have loved that ''Thunder Road'' performance. Gary said that was great and it has a big guitar and sax solo in it. He was able to play it on piano though. Howard said what a gem this guy is. He said this already got him. He played some of the song. He said he's just so moved by this.

  Howard said he was going to ask about the song Rosalita. He said he wondered if he ever went back to the woman he wrote the song about and pointed out that she made a bit mistake. Gary wondered who gets a restraining order against a 15 year old. Howard said he loved the whole theme of that song. He said it goes back to when he was starting out and he'd play that song a lot. He said he liked the length of that song too because he was able to compose himself. He said he didn't expect him to break into that song yesterday. He said he was just so loose. He played some of that performance too.

  Howard said after the interview when they turned off the microphones they took some pictures and he thanked him for coming in. He said Bruce loved the whole thing. He said then he left. He said he was sitting there alone and pacing up his stuff. He said Gary came in and said that John Landau was there in the waiting room. Howard said he's a fan of his so he wanted to talk to him. He said he loves that a writer became his manager. Howard was distracted by a spider so he had to take time to get rid of that. Howard said it came down from the ceiling. He said there have been so many in there recently. He said he doesn't want to knock himself off the air. He said he's being attacked. He said it lowered itself from the ceiling on a web. He said he should let it bite him and maybe he'll turn into Spider-Man.

  Howard said just to fill you in on the rest of the story Gary said John Landau was there so he was introduced to him. He said the stood around for 5-10 minutes just talking about stuff there in the studio. He said he thanked John for getting Bruce in there. He said John said to him that he has sat through a lot of Bruce interviews and this was the best he's heard. Gary said what Bruce said was that he has done a lot and he doesn't think he's ever done anything quite like that.

  Howard said he thinks he had a headache from the relief of getting that over with. He said he was reminded how much he hates New York City traffic after the show. He said he always calls a guest so he can thank them. He said Bruce had already called and texted him. He said he beat him to the punch. He said he figured he had already had enough but he said some nice things in the text. He said it made him so happy that he had a good time. He said Patti said it was the best interview ever. He said that made him feel good too. He said his head was spinning from all of that. He said he called Ross Zapin about it and he called his wife too. He said he called her first. He said she knew what he was going through. He said he had locked himself up for 3 days before.

  Howard said he spoke to Robin about it. He said he may have called her first. He said he called Fred too and got no satisfaction there.

  Howard said he got a lot of feedback and calls about the interview. He said he got an email from Max Weinberg from the E Street Band and he wrote him a note about it. He said he has to say it made his day. He said that he couldn't believe what he wrote. He said he can't share it because he's not sure he wants him to share it on the air. He said he called Gary and said he knows how hard he worked to get him on the show. Gary said he cried 3 times yesterday. He said he got a text from his son and he said he knows what this means to him. He said he hopes this day is as great as he hopes it is. He said it was.

  Howard asked Gary what the story was about Bruce Springsteen and his kids thinking he was related because he went to so many of his shows. Gary said they were out at dinner one night and he and Ross had been going to a lot of his shows. He said Lucas was like 7 and he asked if they were related because he talked about him so much.

  Howard said someone called Gary and asked if he was going to be okay. Gary said that was his older son who asked him about that. He said he was going to walk him into the studio and he'd be fine. Howard said Gary was very professional. Gary said he has to say that he got a call from Bruce's manager and he was very happy about it. He said he told him it reminded him of what it was like being at a Bruce show because everything was locked down and there was no drama there. Howard said they do run a pretty tight ship there. He said he's happy to hear that. He said they don't have a bullshit operation going there.

  Howard said he feels like their organization is a reflection of him. He said when he goes to TV shows, which he isn't doing much these day, he can get turned off if they don't run things professionally. He said he's glad they were happy because that's what he'd want to experience on a show. He said that was really fucking great. He said Landau has been around the block and that's great to hear. Howard said the staff put in a lot of work and that's really great.

  Howard said he knows there are fans who want to talk about Bruce. He said he'll take a few calls and then move on. Robin said Howard has come down from such a high. Howard said he got home and exercised to try to calm the fuck down. He said there's nothing better than throwing around 3 pound wights to get his masculinity going. He said there's nothing better than benching 15 pounds to get the stress out of him.

  Howard said he and Bruce were texting and he figured he was getting sick of him. He said Dan Foreman wrote to him as one of the first people to get to him. He said he wrote him a long email and it was fabulous. He said he sent it to Bruce. He said he had to read this. He said when he told Dan he sent it to Bruce he was blown away. He said he was beside himself. Howard said he couldn't calm down after the interview. He said his head was pounding and he went to bed and watched Bachelor in Paradise. He said he couldn't calm down from that. He said Beth went right to sleep. He said he had to pause the show. He said he went to sleep and got up at 2 again. He said he wasn't able to calm down. He said he had Bruce in his head. He said he was hearing the songs in his head at 2 in the morning.

  Howard said Bruce said he would come back again any time. He said he wanted him back today. He said he started to stress out about the questions he didn't ask him. He said he wants to save his question for next time. He said he was going nuts at 2 in the morning. He said he was reading his Kindle and reading the NY Times. He said people are making fun of what happened to Nancy Pelosi. He said it's a mess. Robin said that people who are in charge are laughing about it. He said he was flipping out about that. He said it's going to take him a while to clam down from that interview.

  Robin said she wrote him a little text. Howard said he had to call her. Robin said it was an incredible accomplishment.

• Howard's Mom Updated About The Bruce Interview. 11/01/22. 8:00am
  Howard said his mother is out of it but her helper texted Beth and said she wanted to know how the interview went. He said Beth said to him that he should call her and tell her. Howard said he groaned about that. He said when he calls he has to wait for her to set up her phone. He said that Beth made him do it. He said she said he had to call and tell her because she was interested in something. Howard said he called her and she was saying he was talking too fast. He said he's talking in a normal way and she just can't hear him. He said he was thinking maybe he's not a good communicator. He said he doesn't talk fast though. He said he had to explain that to his mom.

  Howard said everything is a criticism. He said he ended up calling and had to go through the usual set up. He said he got on and told her how it went. He said they were talking over one another. He said it was wonderful. He said Bruce was amazing. He said she told him how great Beth is to her. He said she got her some new clothes. He said that she's very thin now. He said Beth is sending her 9 pair of pants. He said they have to get her a bunch so she can figure out what size she needs. Howard said she asked for pants so they're doing this for her. He said she gets upset about how many the got her.

  Howard was doing his impression of his mother as he told the story. He had his mother on the phone with him and he's explaining to her what's going on with the clothes. He said she's saying ''thank god for Beth'' and she has no idea that it's both of them. He said she thinks she must have done something right in her life to deserve Beth. Howard said that's what a husband says about his wife. He said he wants to correct her but he can't do it. He said she talks about what an angel Beth is to her. He said she had him and that's how she got Beth. Howard said he told her that she was a wonderful mother and took care of him and raised a family. He said he has to pump her up.

  Howard said here he is all pumped up about the interview and he has to be on the phone with his mother calming her down. He had his mother talking about how she has to find a better man for Beth. He kept telling his mom he had to go. Robin said he'll never get a big head as long as she's around.

  Howard said when Bruce was talking yesterday about most performers having one parent that knocks them down and one who thinks that they're the next coming. He said that he hit it right on the head. He said that's exactly what he had. He said he wants to write a book about how to raise children. He said one parent will tell them how they're nothing and then the other is the one who tells them they're the best thing. He said you end up with a Bruce Springsteen.

• Calls And Cocktober Extends To Cockvember. 11/01/22. 8:10am
  Howard took a call from a woman who said he did the most amazing interview. Howard said Bruce was on fire. He said he's the best. The caller said it was all so organic. She said she was blown away. Howard said he is too. He said he's right there with her.

  Howard said enough with the phone calls. Robin said he should let people do that for him. Howard said he's not comfortable with it. He said that's it. Robin said he's cutting them off and not being polite. Howard said let him try again.

  Howard took a call from a guy who said that he gets that he doesn't like that. He said he has to give himself major praise for what they did yesterday. He said Howard has come such a long way. He said that they went through a lot of emotion yesterday. He said it was very fantastic. He said he's not sure where he goes from here. He said if he writes a book does he have that interview over Conan's. Howard said he thinks it might be. He said it was the best radio experience ever. The caller said that's the best way to end Cocktober. Howard said Cocktober got short shrift. He said he has to make this announcement. He said they're extending Cocktober into Cockvember. He said they're going to do something tomorrow. He said the Dickcathlon is happening tomorrow. He said they're going to be doing some stuff tomorrow.

  Howard said Medicated Pete will be singing a ''Purple Vein'' song parody to start off the show. He said Richard and Sal will be doing a Cockvember special. He said that they're going to be doing penis fishing and he heard that looks like full on gay sex. Richard and Sal said they have rehearsed and it does look very gay. Howard said he heard that Sal had to take a shit and his ass smelled. Richard said it smelled really bad. He said he's going to be shaved for tomorrow. Howard asked why not wipe. Sal said he did wipe. He said he had to take a monster shit. He said he may have had some streaks or something on the sides. He said Richard's ass looks like the back of a Crunch bar. Howard asked why all the zits. Richard said it must be from sweating a lot down there. He said he starts sweating as soon as he comes out of the shower. Howard said try Tommy John underwear. He said he never sweats in those.

  Sal said that Richard's ass flap has gotten really big too. He said it looks like a door down there. Howard said he heard that they're just about laying on each other with the penis fishing thing. Robin asked how they do this. She asked if the penis is the rod. They said it is. Richard said they have to go fishing and their penises are just about in their butts. Howard said then they're going to do Tai-Kwon-Dong together. Richard said you have to swing your dick down and make it chop the spaghetti. Sal said it's like a karate flop instead of a chop. Howard said Gary and JD will be holding the spaghetti during that event. Sal said he wonders if Lucas will write his dad about that one.

  Howard said they're going to have Michael Rapaport in there to spank Richard. He played a clip of Richard asking Michael to do that to him to punish him for something.

  Howard said they're going to cram a month's worth of cock bits into one show. He said that will be happening tomorrow. Robin asked why this had to go until November. The guys said that they had to do a lot of rehearsal. Howard said they had at lest 3 meetings over this.

  Howard said Michael Rapaport sent in a song about Richard. He said he's no Bruce Springsteen for sure. Howard played the song that Michael did about spanking Richard's ass. Howard said he is good and he does have some musical ability. Robin said she thinks he really feels that one. She said he really nailed that.

  Howard said Richard responded to that song with his own. He played the song where he sang about Michael spanking him with his best shot.

  Howard said this is scary a little bit. Richard said that's what he thought. He said that he thought Michael would be freaked out when he asked him to spank him but he seems to be into it. Howard asked if he's thinking he might get aroused during this. Richard said he might try. Howard asked if he will jizz on his knee. Richard said he'll try. Howard said they were going to invite Art the Clown to this but he declined saying it's too scary for him.

  Howard said he heard that Pat Benetar wont do her song ''Hit Me With Your Best Shot'' anymore because it's about violence. Howard said if she's not doing that then what songs is she doing. He said he never thought of it as a real hit kind of thing. He said that's the last thing he's thinking of when she does that song. He said she can do the song. Robin said she can do whatever songs she wants to do. Gary said she says that she's in protest of gun violence. He said she's also getting into the Rock and Roll Hall of fame this Saturday night. Howard asked who's inducting her. Gary said he doesn't know.

  Howard took a call from a guy who said he's number 1 in his book and Bruce is number 2. He said he goes to his shows and he sounded great yesterday. He said he was immaculate. He said he posted in a Bruce chat about the interview and he got a lot of responses from women who don't listen. Howard said John Landau told him that Bruce's fans were really going to love this. He said that made him happy hearing that. He said that's real important to him. He said his fans are very particular. He said it made him real happy to hear that.

  The caller said his favorite part was when Bruce went off the air the talked about the Cocktober thing. He said that he's not sure if the can change that or not. Howard said that's the beauty of this show. Robin said they went from divine to deplorable. Richard said that's what Jimmy Kimmel has said about the show.

  Howard took a call from a woman who said she's upset that they don't hear women on the show anymore. She said the do Cocktober but not Vaguary. Howard said maybe they can go fishing in the caller's vagina. He said maybe the can play a Gash Wednesday with Robin. Sal said you can't chop spaghetti with your clitoris. Howard said Robin can.

• Medicated Pete At A Nude Beach. 11/01/22. 8:30am
  Howard said Medicated Pete will be on with his penis and he'll have a microphone taped to his penis. He said his penis is the microphone stand. Robin said that's kind of heavy. Howard said that's where the fun comes in.

  Howard said they sent Medicated Pete to a nude beach and Sal went with him. Sal said there are some very attractive people there. He said then you throw Pete into the mix and it's very interesting. He said Pete wanted to show off his penis. He said he thought that women would be attracted to him immediately. Howard said Pete is so frustrated sexually. He said he has a lot of issues. He said he has all sorts of things going on and he has this huge penis. He said if he could walk around naked he has an advantage. He said Pete is in his 40s at this point and still living with his mom. He said he has this giant dong of his and he is obsessed with showing it off.

  Howard said this is Pete talking about having a dream for his big ween. He played a clip where Pete was talking about how he thinks women would love it if they saw it. Pete said to be naked on the beach might work out for him.

  Howard said Wolfie and Sal were there and they were not nude. Sal said they were not. Robin said it's not like nude beaches are a new thing. She said they've been around but Pete is just now getting there. Howard said he should build a house there.

  Sal said this beach had about 50 percent nude and 50 percent clothed people. He said it's in New Jersey. He said it's very odd. He said you see a guy's dick flopping around. He said then a woman walks by naked. He said that there were guys who had tiny penises and they're walking around very proud.

  Howard had some audio of Pete talking about what he wants to do at the beach and how he's not sure what he'd do if a woman asked to suck his cock right there at the beach. He said he would jerk off there if he could. He said if he gets turned on he might jerk off with a towel. He said that might be in the cards. Howard said this is a nudist's nightmare. He said you don't jerk off at a nude beach. He said it's like trying not to pass out when you meet Bruce Springsteen.

  Howard said Pete said he learned that if he gets aroused you roll over and bury your dick in the sand. Wolfie said he was so prepared for this trip. He said he had done research and he was ready to hide his dick if he had to. Howard said most people bring a beach towel to the beach. He said Pete brought a small discolored towel there. Sal said it was like a rag you'd keep in the trunk of your car. Howard said come on man.

  Howard asked when Pete took his clothes off. Wolfie said it was right away. He said as soon as he hit the sand his pants came off. Sal said they got there and as soon as his feet hit the walkway he started taking his clothes off. He said he wanted to make a grand entrance to the beach.

  Jason had a picture to show Howard. Howard saw it and laughed. He said he looked like that Powder character. Robin said he looks like an unfinished statue.

  Howard said Pete asks women to evaluate his penis and that did not go well. Howard played a clip and women were telling him to get away from them. Wolfie said that some people just waved him off. He said they were flailing away.

  Howard said Pete has a lot of ticks that he does and he has a huge bush apparently. Sal said it's a bush but it's a crooked bush.

  Howard said Pete moved on to men since women weren't talking to him. Howard played a clip of some guys telling him that he's like a 5. One guy said he needs a shave. He said even though it's red it has to go. The guy was laughing at him. Howard said most of the nudists felt his big bush was a turn off.

  Howard said that Sal and Wolfie said that Pete was bigger than that guy. Wolfie said his penis is enormous. He said that guy short changed him.

  Howard played a clip of Pete talking to some gay guys about his penis and they were impressed. One guy said he'd rate that at a 9. He said it could be tanner but he's a ginger. They were kind of coming on to him and asking him to come to their tent. Pete bailed on that idea.

  Howard said Pete found this to be a big turn on. He said he found it hard to contain his excitement. Howard played a clip where Pete said that he was getting aroused during the conversations he was having and he had to bring up his towel to cover up. He said it's just the conversation alone that gets him going. Wolfie said he was just inches away from Pete and he was getting aroused. He said it just started growing. Richard said they should see if they can get him going tomorrow on the show.

  Howard said Chris Wilding is gay so could he blow a guy like Pete. He said he has a huge penis and the rest of him isn't so great. He asked if he can get into just the penis. Chris said it's such a formula. He said there are average guys who have big penises. He said that he could do that for them but Pete is so odd looking that the penis doesn't do it for him. He said it doesn't pass the test. He said he thinks Pete gets a lot of attention from gay men and they complement him. He said he doesn't get the attention from women that he wants. He said gay men could be into that. He said for him he needs a little more.

  Wolfie said Pete had giant spittle deposits on the sides of his mouth. He said someone called him Kujo. He said women were freaked out by that.

  Howard said he hasn't seen Pete in a long time so this should be good tomorrow. He said that he's excited to see Pete. He said he's a good sport about the whole thing. He played a song parody about Pete's dick.

  Jason had a full frontal picture of Pete at the beach. Everyone laughed when they saw his big bush. Richard said it looks like he has Carrot Top in a leg lock.

  The guy said that Derek was going to be the guy who has to put the microphone on Pete tomorrow. Derek got on and said this is the first he's hearing about that. He said he has had to do a lot of dick stuff on the show. He said he had to do the Sal and Richard dick stuff. Howard asked who put the microphone on the penis during rehearsal. Derek said today is the first time for Pete. He said they can throw away the lav microphone they're going to use tomorrow. He said once something touches a penis the throw it in the garbage.

  Howard said Derek is the kind of guy who is dedicated to his job. He said he's like the Bruce Springsteen of Cockvember. Derek said he appreciates that. Robin said she's wondering how this singing into his cock thing is going to work. She said this rehearsal is going to be interesting. Howard said they had a sign on the door when Pete was in there. He said the have a sign that say's ''Meeting in process.'' Howard went to a break a short time later.

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• Howard Takes Some Calls. 11/01/22. 8:55am
  After the break they played a Lenny Dykstra pussy eating sex tip bit, a phony phone call the guys made to a woman using Tracy Morgan clips and The Cranberries ''Zombie.''

  Howard came back and said he loves this song. He said it's not easy to write a song like that. He said the lead singer, Dolores O'Riordan, died in a bathtub. He said she was 4 times over the legal limit in England. He read some details about Dolores' death before moving on.

  Howard took a call from a guy who said that one thing he learned yesterday is that Bruce said he felt like he was an underrated guitar player. Howard said he loved that he said that. He said he was watching a performance of his and he was banging out a lead with Tom Morello. He said he's really good. He said he was blown away by what he was doing in studio yesterday too. The caller said whoever engineered that yesterday did a great job. He said the sound quality was phenomenal. Howard said they wanted to create a place where artists love to play live. He said they have a great bunch of guys there. Gary said he's not sure the ones who they want to give kudos to can get on with them. Howard said they do a great job there and they are the unsung heroes of the Howard Stern Show.

  Howard took a call from a guy who said he was hit hard by that Clarence Clemons story yesterday. He said he lost his mom over the summer. He said he feels for Howard losing his dad over the summer too. The caller told a story about singing a song to his mom toward the end and he's so glad he did it. He said he just broke down yesterday listening to Bruce so he wanted to thank him for that.

  Howard said his mother sings him a song every time he visits her. He said she sings about how she loves him more than a bushel in a peck. He said she starts to recite the lyrics and he thinks it's so beautiful. He said she sang another song one time and he wasn't thinking about it until this caller mentioned that. He said that story yesterday that Bruce told about Clarence was really touching. He said when he heard that he got completely overwhelmed with emotion. He said he didn't think he was going to play the song that he played for Clarence. He said he got up to move and he thought he wasn't going to do it. Then he switched guitars. He said he went over and did the song. Howard played that again. He said what a show the had yesterday. The caller said he made it seem like they were in the room with them. Howard said he still can't believe he was in the room with him while he did all of that.

  Robin said she wanted to ask if he really thinks he's going to see Clarence again. Howard said he's not sure what Bruce thinks about that. Howard said that was one for the ages yesterday.

  Howard said his mother sings this song about the bushel and a peck. He said it's a Doris Day song. He said she looks him in the eye and sings this song. The guys played the actual song for him. Howard said his mother starts out slow and recites the lyrics and then she keeps going but not really singing it. He said she says she loves him and it's very emotional. Robin said that's very sweet. Howard said his mom sings like William Shatner. He said she does that talking kind of singing. He said it was really sweet.

  Howard said she sings another song but not like William Shatner. Robin said she must have sung that to Howard as a child. Howard said she did all the time. She sang ''Daisy'' to him too. He sang some of that for Robin.

  Howard said she did that song which was pretty big back then. He said that she wasn't singing that stuff to his father. He said he never heard any of that.

  Howard said he's had a lot of heavy stuff lately. Howard answered a knock at the door and it was fake William Shatner. Bill said he didn't know if he could have sung that any better. He said his mother goes and sings that song. He did his own version of that Doris Day song. Howard went not his mother's voice and talked to Bill for a minute.

  Howard said the other song his mother did was ''Summertime.'' He said the family would go into the recording studio and sing songs and stuff. He said his mother would do that song. He said his father would get upset with him for not knowing what to say. Howard played some of his mother singing ''Summertime.'' Robin said she had a nice voice. Howard said that was from the Broadway show Porgy and Bess.

  Robin said Howard was saying earlier that Bruce said that one parent says you're nothing and one says you're the next coming. She said she saw a guy yelling at his son against a wall and saying that's why no one wants to take you anywhere. She said you'd think that he had an audience the way he was talking. Howard said father's are great with their sons, aren't they?

  Howard took a call from a guy who said that he's not a big Bruce fan but when he did Thunder Road he was in tears. Howard said there is nothing better than Bruce Springsteen stripped down musically. He said that's why he loved that so much. The caller said he has had two gastric bypass surgeries and he loves his Dr. Now stuff. He said he had one about 30 years ago and he was down from 450 to 200 and then he was back at 350 and now he's going back down again. Howard said he didn't know they could do that more than once.

  Howard took a call from Mike from Maine who said he's not a big Springsteen fan either but he cried his eyes out a few times yesterday. He said he should have done some bits with Gary to get him to be able to sit in the studio. Howard said he didn't want to do anything like that. He said it was great being in there alone with Bruce. He said he teared up during one of the songs. He said it may have been Thunder Road. He played that performance again.

  Howard said he was just so lucky to be able to sit in the studio while that was happening. He said he was very lucky to be able to do that.

  Howard said he didn't even know he was going to do that Thunder Road thing. He said he was overwhelmed with his generosity. He said he gave him so much time and brought those songs to life. He said it was just too great.

  Robin said that his songs are like hymns. She said it's what you wish church music could be like. Howard said in high school he wrote a paper about how he got more religion from rock and roll than he did from going to a religious service. He said he went to a lot of church school studies and he never got any feeling from it. He said he felt it was a tremendous waste of time. He said then he put the Beatles on and he got so much feeling from that. He said sitting with Bruce was more of a religious thing for him than church. He said this guy is 73 and he's singing his own compositions and he doesn't need help from anyone else. He said he's maybe better than he's ever been. Robin said he did say that he sounds better than ever. Robin said she didn't know about how he had that operation and had the vocal chord thing moved.

  Howard took a call from a guy who said he was never a big Bruce fan either but hearing the lyrics and artistry was a humbling moment for him. He said that he'll never look at Bruce the same again. He said it was one of Howard's best interviews too. Howard said everything about it was perfect for him. He said he gets what he's saying.

  Howard took a call from a guy who said that his father passed away in August and he knows Howard's passed away. He said they were waiting for Howard to come back from his hiatus. He asked how he worked through it with his father. He said his father was his best friend and they bonded with Howard's show. He said his father was 72 when he passed.

  Howard said he's jealous that he was best friends with his father. He said he and his father had a very distant relationship. He said his father didn't have the bandwidth to do that. He said his father had a lot of bad things in his life. He said he was handicapped with one eye and he never talked about it. He said it was weird. He said it was a big secret. He said even when he dated his mother he didn't bring it up. He said he never complained about it. He said he would only bring it up once in a while. He said his father didn't know how to have a son. He said at the end he said he loved his father and he wasn't able to say the same back. He said he just said okay.

  The caller said that he had a generational thing with his dad. He said he had him when he was 40. He said there was a lot of bonding with the show and baseball and things like that. Howard said he got his ass on the radio and he got his father's attention that way. He said if he hadn't he's not sure how things would have worked out.

  Howard said his father was an engineer and he got his attention by getting into radio himself. He thanked the caller for the call.

  Howard said he had a great interview with Billy Joel too. He said they went to the Cutting Room and spoke to Billy for a few hours. He said that was great too.

  Howard asked if Jennifer Witz will get a picture of him in her office now. He said he actually heard from her yesterday. He said that when he was complaining about the picture he and the crew got a picture of him to send to her so she can put it up in her office. He said he woke up in the middle of the night thinking that was not a good idea. He said he had a 48 hour rule there so they waited to send it. He said he wanted that so he can change his mind. He said he changed his mind on that picture. He said Jennifer and Scott Greenstein were very happy about the Bruce interview. Robin sake if she said it was better than any Andy Cohen interview. Howard said he thanked her on behalf of the show. He said these things wouldn't have happened if they hadn't come there. He said he thanked her for keeping this company going so they can continue to do stuff like that. He said it doesn't happen without them keeping things going. He said he was appreciative of them over that.

  Howard took a call from fake Jennifer Witz who said she put up a picture of Bruce next to Andy Cohen in her office. She said she's just busting his balls. She said that he had better keep this train rolling. Howard said he can't rest on his laurels. Witz said that he has earned a sip of her executive soda up there. She said nothing more than a sip though. Howard said he will take her up on that.

  Howard took a call from Mariann from Brooklyn who said this was the perfect time for both of them yesterday. She said that Howard is on the air a lot and he can say things off color. She said that Bruce didn't even want him to apologize. Howard said it's weird hearing her speak in a normal voice. He hung up on her.

  Howard took a call from a guy who said that was a perfect show to come back to the studio for. He said he was volunteering yesterday and he started telling that story about his friend passing away from cancer and he had to wipe his eyes. He said he was trying not to cry in front of people at work. He works in the hospice thing so he knows what that's like. Howard said he knows what that's like.

  Howard took a call from a guy who said that interview was great yesterday. He said Bruce was laughing a lot at what Howard was saying. He said he found that interesting.

  Howard took a call from a guy who said he has been listening to his show for a very long time from Canada. He said his show has evolved quite a lot. He said that Bruce was great yesterday. He wondered who else he wants in there. Howard said he wants Bruce in there 5 more times. He said he was that great.

  Howard said Jennifer Witz wanted him to get Jimi Hendrix on the show. He said that he'd be like 80 now.

• Fan Feedback And A New Phony Phone Call. 11/01/22. 9:40am
  Howard said a lot of fans wrote in about the mash up of Rob Zombie's song and Monster Mash. He said the fans like that a lot. He read some feedback about that.

  Howard said the fans liked the phony phone call last week where they used drops of him riffing on Monster Mash and mixing it up in the call to an internet radio show. Howard said the guys took that and made another phony phone call. He said this doesn't get old to him. He said it's fun to hear this stuff. He played the call that Chris made to this radio show and had them listen to his father's version of Monster Mash. The hosts said the don't think anyone would want to hear that. Then they had Howard going to the bathroom and taking a shit. That inspired him to write another version of the song about taking a shit. The hosts said that was the epitome of evil right there. They were praying for him after hanging up on him. Howard said he might have to make more of those mash ups.

• Dying On Air, Harvey Weinstein's Balls And More. 11/01/22. 9:45am
  Howard said over in the UK they have this radio guy named Tim Goff. He said he died in the middle of his show. Howard said that's not the way he wants to go out. He said that's just not the way he wants to go out. He said its too fucking weird. He said this is a clip from the show where this 55 year old passed away. He said he was giving out a birthday shout out and he died. Howard played the clip and this Tim guy was talking about birthdays and then he just disappears. Howard said he died right in the middle of his show.

  Howard said the guy was totally pro and kept the show going. He said he died of a heart attack. He said the paramedics showed up about 20 minutes later but it was too late. Howard said rest in peace buddy.

  Howard said just his luck he'll be doing a Tommy John ad when he dies. He said he really wants to die having sex with Beth. He said there are time he's been out of breath and he thinks he's going to die. He said he has to hold it together and keep going. He said he'd bring in Bruce to sing a song and he'll go. Robin said how about going after having sex. Howard said that's a possibility. He said he was happy in bed watching Bachelor in Paradise and he wouldn't have minded going then.

  Howard said somehow Harvey Weinstein is getting another trial. Robin said this is a new trial. Howard said he thinks he's trying to get out of prison. Jason said this is a new trial with a new person. Gary said this is in L.A. instead of New York. He said he may have to go to Paris as well. Howard said he doesn't understand why they'd do this if he's in jail and he has 50 years in prison already. He said he's already serving a sentence for 23 years in New York. Howard said he gets to go to California to go to trial.

  Howard said he read that Harvey Weinstein had his testicles moved into his thighs in 1999. He said he had some medical thing done back then because he had an infection or something. He said they put the balls in his thigh so he could keep his boners maybe. Robin said she didn't know about that. She said she has never heard of that. She said it never came up when she was in the business.

• The End Of 92.3 K-Rock. 11/01/22. 9:55am
  Howard said he has to pee but he wants to talk about K-Rock and the end of that. He said it's the end of the show though. He said tomorrow is another day. He said he can talk about it tomorrow. He said maybe end the show now and he'll talk about it tomorrow. He said he'll start with the end of K-Rock. He said it's funny. He said he has to pee though.

  Howard said maybe Robin can talk to Fred while he goes pee. Robin said she can do that. Howard said they can do that then. He said he's going to go pee. Fred said this won't go well. Howard left while Robin and Fred talked about how Fred felt about the Bruce Springsteen interview. Fred said it's the most remarkable interview he's ever heard in his life. He said he thinks that cold get him into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Robin and Fred went on and on about Bruce for a couple of minutes. Howard should never leave the show like that again.

  Howard came back and apologized for whatever happened while he was away. Robin said it went well and she enjoyed talking to Fred. Robin went over what she had just talked to Fred about. Fred said it was great to see Howard so happy during that interview. He said he has never seen that joy in Howard in his whole life. Howard said he hasn't had joy since he was like 5 years old.

  Howard said he just wants to talk about the death of K-Rock radio. He said they were there for 20 years or so. Robin said it was exactly 20 years.

  Howard got a note from the guys about something that Fred and Robin had talked about. They were talking about how the could get Howard an Emmy, Grammy and Tony by doing things the right way with Bruce. Howard thanked them for that.

  Howard said they did their show at k-Rock for 20 years. He said it became something else after they left. He said they were still playing music there until just recently. He said now they're simulcasting 1010 WINS news there now. He said they did the change over to news last week. He said on Thursday at 8:50am they changed. Robin said that's an odd time. Howard said there was a weird moment of silence when they switched over. He said it's very odd.

  Howard played the clip where the went from playing music to the WINS simulcast. They had promoted that you can still listen to their alternative music on their app. They switched over at 8:50 a little earlier than the 9:00 time they were supposed to do it. Howard said she was way to happy about killing a radio station. He said the pause was really strange. He said the topper in that statement was that they were supposed to switch at 9 but they did it 10 minutes early. He asked if he's supposed to do a dance for that.

  Howard said people must assume the audience is moronic. He said anyone listening at that moment is pissed. He said the other bullshit thing is that they want you to get the app and listen there. He said no one is doing that. He said they weren't listening to you on the radio so why would they get the app?

  Howard said they must have been in a rush to get to the news. He said he'd like to know what the last song was they played on that station. He said it was LCD Soundsystem ''New York, I Love You but You're Bringing Me Down'' so there must have been some message in there they were trying to tell the listeners.

  Howard said things get weirder. He said the news woman introduces Lin Manuel Miranda and he has no idea what he has to do with the death of a music station. He said he did a countdown for the new format. He said this is really strange. He said how about we just call him Lin Miranda. He said his name is a tongue twister. Howard was saying it wrong and Gary corrected him on that.

  Howard said Lin's agent should be fired over this. He said the countdown just pisses people off who like listening to that station. He asked why a Grammy winner would want to count down for the death of a music station going to a news station.

  Howard played a clip of the host of the news having Lin do his thing. He did the countdown and then introduced 1010 WINS being on 92.3 FM.

  Howard said that Lin sounded like he was on another planet in that clip. He said then the big voice guy comes in. He said it was all very strange. He said he's sure he was in his house and he recorded it. He said no one cares that 1010 WINS is on 92.3. Robin asked how you're going to tell people. She said 1010 is where they are on the AM dial. Howard said the don't need it on the FM dial. He said you can easily listen on AM. Robin said she was looking for something else. She said there is no 1010 on the FM dial. Howard said years ago they tried news on the FM dial and it didn't work. He said he's not sure what they're celebrating.

  Howard said then they had Ed Sheeran show up. He said this guy loves music and he's cheering this on. He said the confusion continues with that. Howard played another clip where Ed did that. He sounded like he didn't care as he read the line. Howard said Ed was probably there for Audacy and he just read it off with a bunch of other lines. He said they didn't explain it to him. Robin said this is all very weird because people who shouldn't be celebrating the death of a music station are celebrating it. Howard said he's going to contact Ed about what they pulled on him.

  Robin said the have to get in touch with Lin Manuel's manager to find out how he got roped into the countdown thing. Howard said you know they tell Ed that it'll be good for him to get his name out there by reading this stuff. He said then they have him read that 1010 WINS can be heard on 92.3 FM now. Howard did a bit where they had Ed reading all kinds of nonsense on a list. He said you know the guy didn't know he was reading about the death of a music station.

  Howard said he doesn't care about this Lin Manuel Miranda guy. He said he's living in the past with this Hamilton stuff. He said he never cared about Hamilton. Robin said he was a great man. Howard said Ed didn't know what he was reading. He said he has to get out of here. He said they have a lot to get to tomorrow. He said it's the final Cocktober into Cockvember special. He said they have to tune into the Dickcathlon. He said there will be a lot going on with cocks. He played a promo for the show. Howard wrapped up the show around 10:20am.

• Cocktober Slides Into Cockvember. 11/02/22. 7:00am
  Howard started the show talking about today's Dickathlon celebration. He said it's Cocktober going into Cockvember. He said that they're going to have a lot of camera men there and they're treating it like a sporting event. Robin said she saw that Richard and Sal looked like they were in a board room working on strategy. Howard said they went over the events they're going to be doing today. He said they have 3 major ones and Medicated Pete will be there. He said they have a lot of logistics to pull off. He said they have so many different people involved and there's a lot of work going on.

  Robin said they were talking about how Pete was going to get mic'd up and did that work. Howard said he put the microphone on himself and he has switched his plan to have him speak to them while his penis is his microphone. He said that one of his guys said less planning went into the Bin Laden raid. He said they weren't even able to get to this during Cocktober. He said they have so much going on and there's so much complexity here. He said they have to make sure the visual comes across on radio.

  Howard said welcome to Cockvember. He said it will be a great event. He said that will happen in a little while. He said they won't wait too long for that. He said they still have people piling in. He said Michael Rapaport will be spanking Richard. He said he hopes to hit him so hard his ass zits will pop. He said Richard may get aroused and cum on Michael. He said there's a lot of action going on. He said he had to go over a lot of this to prepare for this. Robin said she didn't get the fishing event for a while. Howard said they have a lot going on. He said they have the Cockathletes and all of that.

  Howard said he spoke with Richard and he's pumped up about this. He said he has 3 events and the first one is the cock fishing. He said he'll be fishing out of Sal's ass. He said then they have Tai-Kwon-Dong. He said that will be interesting. He said JD and Gary will be holding uncooked spaghetti and the guys will have to try to chop through it with their cocks. He said what they'll be doing is jumping up and down and trying to smash the spaghetti.

  Howard asked Sal and Richard if they see a clear favorite. Richard said they do. He said Sal is great at the Tai-Kwon-Dong thing. He said he was really good at it. He said he's a little worried. He said his uncircumcised cock whips it. Sal said he was showing Richard his technique. He said he made it more competitive. He said Richard has a chubby nub. He said his dick looks like Play-Doh. He said his dick was bouncing off of it and he showed him a better way to do it. Richard said he was hitting it with his head instead of the shaft.

  Howard said Memet is judging this and he has to know all of the rules. He asked if he knows this. Memet said he does and he has to watch very closely unfortunately.

  Howard asked if Sal and Richard cleaned up so they don't smell today. Richard said he showered this morning to make sure he smells okay. He said he even shaved his areas. He said if he has hair it might interfere with the spaghetti thing.

  Howard asked Richard to explain the fishing thing. Richard said he has a magnet on his dick and he has to fish little magnet fish out of Sal's ass. He said it looks like he's banging Sal in the ass. Howard asked if he ever did this in Kansas. Richard said he never did anything like that with his dick. Howard asked Sal if he cleaned his asshole or not. Sal said he did shower this morning. He said he is clean like he is usually. He said Richard is clean and it's out of the ordinary. He said it's just a normal day for him though.

  Howard asked if Sal almost slipped where he got his penis into Richard's asshole. Richard said there was a lot of that going on. He said it seemed like his fishing pole was growing too.

  Howard asked Memet about the guys not using their hands in this. He said they can't do that, right? Memet said they will get fouls if they do that. Sal said they can only use their hands when they remove the fish.

  Howard asked how Sal's ass was. Memet said he noticed there was some kind of white stuff around his ass crack. Sal said it was probably Richard's cum. Richard said he thinks it might be tanning stuff. Sal said it may have been toilet paper. Memet said it was something milky. Howard said maybe it was baby powder or something. Sal said he uses Aveeno cream on his cock and balls and he may put it in his ass. He said he puts it in there to stop itching. Howard said he'd be nervous to put it on his cock. Sal said he uses it to kill the odor down there. Howard laughed.

  Howard said eat your heart out Radio Andy. He said they're the gayest channel on SiriusXM now. He said he prides this channel on being the gayest.

  Howard asked what Aveeno Cream is. Sal said it's a skin cream and it's magical. He said when his asshole itches he puts it on there. He said he will wipe his ass so hard that it bleeds sometimes. He said the cream helps. He said it helps with the smell on his penis too. Howard said Fred doesn't seem to have that issue. He said he's not circumcised. Sal said he has gotten a smell at times so he uses that cream to stop the smell. Howard said he can't believe his wife doesn't want to blow him more. Robin said one way or another she has a bad meal coming. Howard said it must make his wife mental.

  Howard asked Memet if there are any rules about the Aveeno on his penis. Memet said that any kind of cream is fine. He said Richard can put it on too. Robin asked if that's not performance enhancing. Memet said no.

  Howard said he has to mention this third event they're doing. He said the Penis Golfing event is the one he's most excited about. He said the putting is going to be difficult.

  Howard asked who is the hole and who is the golf club. Richard said both of them will be doing it. He said he'll be gaping and Sal will use his dick to get a ball into his asshole. Memet said that the were getting mad at him about that yesterday. He said when their dicks touch the ball that's a stroke. He said they were upset about that. Howard asked if they will be holding their dicks. Richard and Sal said they won't be. He said they just swing their cocks to hit the ball. Richard said Sal has that foreskin so he has that advantage there.

  Howard asked Sal what his handicap is. Sal said he's not sure but he got the ball in two strokes yesterday. Richard said they're going to go by who gets the closest to the hole today.

  Sal said when Richard was spread eagle yesterday it was the most disturbing thing. He said it looked like his asshole was blown up by fireworks. Richard said he has a fucked up asshole but Sal has a fucked up dick so they're even.

  Memet said Richard has some medical anomaly. He said he has this thing that dangles off his ass. He said it's like a uvula. Sal said it looks like something out of a medical book. Richard said Sal's ass is very weird looking too. He said he has some stuff going on down there. Howard asked if he had his hemorrhoids on display. Richard said he didn't see any of that.

  Howard said they took a poll there and the staff thinks Richard is going to win this event. He said he's the favorite to win. Howard asked Sal if he has anything to say to Richard to trash talk. Sal said that he's going to be the winner with his cock. He said that he did better at a few things yesterday. He said he's talking Richard down. Richard said he's going to take Sal down today. He said he was able to piss on command last year when Sal couldn't.

  Howard said Sal has a history of choking in these events. Richard told him to choke on his dick. Howard said they have a trophy and the winner will cum in the cup at the end. Richard said he didn't know that. Howard asked if either one of them can get aroused. Sal said his dick gets inverted when he sees Richard naked.

  Howard asked if they have any tests to make sure they're not doping. Memet said they do not. He said they should. Howard asked if any of the guys took Viagra this morning. Richard said he just had some coffee this morning. Sal said he did not take anything.

  Howard said this is very exciting. He said after the events they have Michael Rapaport coming in to spank Richard. Richard said he didn't think that he'd go through with it. He said he is going to spank him though. Robin asked if he popped his zits at all. Richard said he doesn't see them so he doesn't know what's going on back there.

  Howard asked if Sal shaved down. Sal said he did some trimming of the area. He said he has to keep it clean and fresh. He said put your money on him today.

  Howard asked if he stayed away from his wife. Sal said he didn't stay away from her but she stayed away from him.

  Memet said that Medicated Pete had tape on his dick and he pulled some of his hair off when he took the tape off. Howard asked why he didn't shave down. Memet said it would look twice as big if he did shave down. Howard said it might be fun for him if he does shave it down. Sal said he did shave for the event. He said he shaved yesterday during rehearsal. He said he still has a big bush though.

  Howard said he played a lot of tape of Pete yesterday. He said he has something he didn't mention yesterday. He said when he went to the nude beach Wolfie noticed he had abrasion on his penis. He said Pete talked about what they were. Howard played the a clip and Pete said they're from jerking off a lot. He said he rubs himself raw. He said he jerks off like 2 or 3 times a day and that's how raw it gets. He said he uses lube but it wears off. He said he tries to put stuff on it but he gets into it more and keeps going. Robin said she thinks he's using soap on it. She said that's drying.

  Richard said he loves how you can't get anything past Wolfie. He said he's there staring at his dick. Howard said there's almost a hand print on his dick.

  Howard said there's a lot of questions about the event. He took a call from a woman who said Richard and Sal are obviously gay and she wondered what their wives think about this. Howard said Sal's wife would be thrilled if Sal became gay. He said she's hoping they will finally consummate during this event today. He said they're pros and they make a living with their penises. Richard said they're gay for pay. Howard said without this they're pretty worthless around there.

  Howard took a call from a guy who said he was going to get breakfast but to hell with that after this conversation. He asked if someone gets injured do they have backups. Howard said they do not. He said they have a limited number of staff to do this. He said Benjy used to be up for this stuff but he thinks he's matured out of it now. Richard said he'd think he'd want to show his body off now that he's lost weight. Howard said Benjy has evolved and he's not as into it as he used to be.

  Howard took a call from a guy who said they have a product on the market called Bountyall that's made for women to use in their vaginas to stop the smell. He said that's what Sal should be using for his penis.

  Howard took a call from a guy who asked if this is the same show that interviewed Bruce Springsteen. Howard said their setup is right by where Bruce had his piano. The caller asked how this started. Howard said it started a couple of years ago and he said that Sal and Richard do some stunts and he wanted to get it more organized. He said they started the tradition back then. He said a lot of people are excited about this. Howard said the microphone that Pete will be using is the same one that Hillary wore when she was in there. Richard and Sal said that they have so much plastic down on the floors that it looks like a scene out of Dexter.

  Howard said things are getting very sexual in there. Robin said they could have a mess at any time in there. Howard said Sal's Aveeno may dry up and he may have to put more on.

  Howard took a call from a guy who said this is an amazing day. He said he told his wife about all the events they've done over the years. He said his wife looked horrified hearing about them. He said he didn't get laid after telling her about this stuff. Howard said Beth asked what they're doing on the show today and he told her about what they'll be doing. He said she got grossed out by the whole thing. He said he realized he was losing his audience. He said she has been so high off the Bruce Springsteen interview and this was taking all of that away. He said she was treating him like he was a very important man. He said then she didn't want to hear this stuff today. He said he told her that her brothers will like this stuff. Sal said they're dedicating the show to Dave and Doug today then. He said maybe next year they can sit in and be involved. Howard said he thinks they have big cock and balls so they might be up for it.

  Howard said he's looking forward to this. He said he wants to know what Ronnie thinks about this because he's taking their cock dildos in his asshole. Ronnie said he thinks Sal is going to win today. He said he has that extra meat there. He said they make fun of him for taking things in his ass but look at what's going on here. Richard said he's not making fun. He said he thinks it's great that Ronnie wasn't able to fit his dildo up his ass. Ronnie said it's a sex act and he's not doing it by himself. He said he'd not sticking things in his own ass. He said it's part of a sex session. He said it's not him alone.

  Howard said he still can't believe that his fiancee isn't repulsed sticking things in his ass. He said he can't believe he'd let her do it. He said it's a weird thing. He said it's not very manly. He said he's spreading his legs apart and letting her stick things in his ass. Ronnie said it turns her on and he has no idea how much. He said it's like she's fucking him in his ass. Howard said the glow of the Bruce interview is officially gone now.

  Howard asked Ronnie if he thinks Sal and Richard are gay. Ronnie said if course. He said they think he has gay tendencies but these guys are sticking their dicks in each other's ass. Howard played a song parody about all of this gay stuff. Howard was cracking up thinking about the gay stuff they're doing. He said they'll hear from them later in the show.

• Bruce, Calls And More. 11/02/22. 7:45am
  Howard said he was still so high off of the Bruce Springsteen interview. He said he asked him about a super group and if he would ever do that. He said he talked about playing with John Fogerty. He said he would love that to happen. He said he always loved John. He said he was thinking about it last night and how great that would be. He said he loves Credence Clearwater Revival. He said this is one of the greatest riffs in the world. He said he thinks this is one of the greatest riffs of all time. He played some ''Up Around the Bend.'' Howard said he can see Bruce and John doing something good. He said that riff is something. He played it again.

  Howard said he may have to get those two in there. He said he has had both on the show now. He said he will say this. He said he and Bruce were texting again yesterday. He said they're both on such a high from the interview. He said they're going to do it again sometime. He said he's already beating himself up about the stuff he didn't ask him. Robin said he can stop because he'll have another opportunity. Robins said he kept saying he would come back. He said even before anyone even asked about it he said he would come back. Howard said he loves that.

  Howard took a call from a woman who said she's thinking about Bruce and wondering if he was a Sirius subscriber and he's listening to the show for the first time and this is the show he tunes in for. Howard said he told Bruce they're not on the air today. He said Bruce actually does have a channel there so he has Sirius. Howard said he told him that the only work Monday and Tuesday so he won't be on today. Robin said she hopes there was some progress made with Patti and she's not listening today. Howard said that might be the end if she hears the show today.

  Howard said he's still in the glow of the Bruce thing. He said that they'll be putting it up on the app and he saw a rough cut of it last night. He said he watched it 3 times. He said it was out of pure pleasure. He said Bruce looks so good. Howard said he made a mistake by not wearing something nicer. He said he should have worn something else. He said Beth saw it and asked about it. Howard said Ralph told him that he didn't have many clothes and he wanted to Zoom with him. He said he doesn't care about clothes. He said everything with him is hours of preparation. Howard said he did run it by Beth. He said she thought it looked good. Howard said he was wearing his jacket over it. He said forget it.

• Heidi Klum's Halloween Party. 11/02/22. 7:50am
  Howard said he was watching this Heidi Klum and her Halloween party. He said she should stay home already. He said it's for kids. He said she got a lot of publicity with it. He said he was watching it and Heidi is really good looking. He said she takes such joy in uglying herself up for this party. He said as a person who has been ugly and victimized by that he takes offense at that. He said that in a way she's appropriating his culture by making herself ugly. He said she dressed up as a worm. He said she's almost naked getting into her costume. He said she has a great body and she shows it off but only as she's getting into her costume. He said then she gets into this worm costume. He said she's super ugly in the costume. He said she thinks it's fun to be ugly. He said he can say it's not fun.

  Howard said she has this party and Elon Musk showed up for that. Robin let out an ''ugh'' when she heard that. Howard said he has to talk about him too.

  Howard said Heidi was being interviewed on the ground laying there like a worm. He played some audio of that interview where she was on the ground talking to people. s

  Howard said he likes Heidi. He said she was very sweet when he worked with her. He said that voice of her's was tough to take for 6 or 7 hours at a time. He said he can hear that voice in his head. Howard said he had PTSD listening to that clip.

  Howard said Heidi was divorced from Seal when he worked with her. He said she always had something going on. He said he'd hear that voice and he wondered who she was talking to. He said she was talking to Seal one time and she wanted him to talk to Seal on the phone once. He said that he picked up and said hi. He said he just let out a groan. He said he thinks he was having a tough conversation with Heidi and he just had to let off some steam. He said that was the whole conversation. He said Heidi is a nice person. He said she dresses up ugly though. He said just stay home with the kids.

  Howard said Heidi's daughter went dressed up as Cat Woman. He said that's the right thing to do. He said she's hot.

• Elon Musk And Twitter. 11/02/22. 8:00am
  Howard said Elon Musk takes over Twitter and he's telling people to say whatever the want. He said it's insane. He said there's a quick story he wants to tell. He said years ago he set up a message board on his web site. He said that he wanted the listeners to create content. He said they set it up and some crazy mother fuckers were on there saying shit that was way out of line. He said it was really negative. He said it was interesting as hell but not as Howard Stern. He said everyone was signing up just to read it. He said he said to himself that he can't let this go on. He said if someone gets on and threatens to kill someone he didn't want to be part of that. He said he shut that mother fucker right down. He said he rested easy after that.

  Howard said now Elon Musk has paid 44 billion to be that guy. He said he's letting anyone say whatever they want. He asked who is excited about this is OJ Simpson. He said you know you're in trouble when OJ is excited about something like that. Howard said OJ wasn't verified and now he can get verified. He said listen to him now. He played a clip of OJ talking about Elon taking over Twitter and how he can get a blue check now. He said there are so many fake OJ accounts and maybe they'll give him that check now.

  Howard said now OJ sees hope at the end of the tunnel. He said he might get a check. He said every one of his postings is video. He said you know it's him. He said if he were OJ he wouldn't want anyone to know where he was.

  Howard asked what's in OJ's mouth when he's talking. He said it sounds like something is in there.

• Lesbian Fan Would Have Sex With Howard. 11/02/22. 8:05am
  Howard took a call from a woman who said she is totally in love with him and has been for the past 30 years. She said she's also a lesbian. Howard said that explains it. He said he thought she was hetero. He said she wouldn't have to fuck him. The caller said she dreams about him all the time. Howard asked if he could get into bed with her and her lesbian girlfriend. She said she would have to have a discussion but that might happen. Howard said maybe it's his feminine look. He said he has titties now that he's gotten older. He said she can tickle his tits.

  The caller, Jerri, said she loves Howard as a person. She said she loves his personality. She said she has been with 3 men in her life. She said she would be with Howard. Howard asked if she'd be okay with him putting his penis in her vagina. She said they could work that out. Howard asked what guys turn her on. She said she's into Brad Pitt and Bradley Cooper and Howard. Howard asked if she's into blow jobs. She said not really. Howard said he's not either so that's fine. He said he thinks that he'd get the job done pretty quickly with her. He said Beth could fill her in on that.

  Howard said he doesn't even care if she cries quietly. He said she can do whatever she has to do. He asked if she's more butch or femme. Jerri said she's more femme. She said she's a bit older now. She said she's 56 now. Howard asked if she shaves her bush. She said absolutely. Howard asked who she looks like. Jerri said there was a skater back in the 90s. She said she wasn't a skater. She said she was something else. Howard asked if she looks like Brian Boitano. She laughed. Robin asked if the woman was a gymnast. Howard said this woman doesn't even know who she looks like. Howard said he knows he looks like that comedian who writes books, Fran Leibowitz.

  Robin asked if it was Mary Lou Retton she was thinking about. Jerri said that's it. Howard said he has to go. He let Jerri go after that. Howard said if he were single he'd take that woman up on her offer. He said he's in love with love.

  Howard said they have to get the party started now. He said he has to win some money from Robin. He did a live commercial read and went to break.

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• The Dickathlon Begins With Medicated Pete. 11/02/22. 8:20am
  After the break they played Right Said Fred's ''I'm Too Sexy.''

  Howard came back and said they had these guys on the show. He said that was a hit they had. Robin said it was just that song the had a hit with. Howard said he hopes they have another one some day.

  Howard said it's time for Dickathlon. He played a theme song for the segment. Howard said hi to the guys who were in the studio. Howard said he's going to do his best with this. He said he's staring at a very naked Medicated Pete. He said good morning to him and Pete was talking into his penis mounted microphone. Howard said if he's hard to understand it's because he's got the microphone on his penis.

  Howard said Richard and Sal are there docking in a toilet paper roll. Howard said they're fully nude and this is very intimate. He asked if anyone is aroused. Richard said not at all. He said it's very weird.

  Gary said they've been there for 10 minutes and Pete does this thing where he locks eyes with you. He said he's naked and if you can play I'm Too Sexy he dances to it. He had Howard do that again so they could see him dancing. Pete did his thing and the guys were saying it just looked weird.

  Howard asked what's going on with Richard's cock today. He said it looks smaller than usual. Sal's was looking bigger. Gar said they had to watch all of that for 10 minutes too.

  Howard asked if Pete is looking at their dicks. Pete was having a hard time getting through to them on his cock microphone. Pete said he tried. Howard said his cock isn't that big today. Pete said he's not sure what happened. Howard said he heard that Pete had taken a dump. Pete said he didn't but the guys said they saw a brown streak in the toilet. They were still trying to figure out his microphone.

  Howard said JD and the guys are part of this. He said Chris Wilding is there and he hasn't been in the office without a mask on until today. Chris said he always said he will get COVID eventually but didn't' want to get it in a stupid way. He said he threw that out the window today.

  Howard said he heard about Pete going to the nude beach and he went back by himself after they took him there. Pete said he liked the feeling being out there. He said he had to go back and do it again. He said he went back and he did the same thing by himself. He said he was going around and getting opinions from people. He said women weren't speaking to him. He said the guys would talk to him though. Howard said he's an interesting guy. He said he felt his pain in that package. He said his cock is so big and he feels like he could get sex if they could see it. Pete said his experiment didn't work.

  Howard said it's terrible etiquette to ask a woman on the beach how his penis is. He said that he has to come up with a different approach. He said maybe just walk around and strut. He said maybe a woman will take a liking to him and his penis. Pete said that would be nice. Robin said he may have to walk for a very long time so wear sun block.

  Richard said Pete has a big dick and very big nipples too. He said he's got faucet nipples. Pete said he's heard that. He said people do say he has big nipples.

  Howard asked Pete if he's still medicated. Pete said of course. He said he's just taking blood pressure pills at this point. He said his Tourettes is really bad right now. Howard asked Pete some questions that he repeats back. Gary said there's something gong on there with him. He said there's a lot of twitches and stuff going on.

  Howard said Pete has some spittle in the corner of his mouth. Robin said she has something to say about Pete. She said she knows what he looks like. She said Pete looks like someone from the movie The Fly with Jeff Goldblum. She said when he turns into Brindle Fly he looks like that. Howard said he thinks he looks like Brad Pitt in Legends of the Fall.

  Howard asked Pete about getting kicked out of school for jerking off on his roommate's pillow. Pete said he went to two schools. He said he got kicked out for nervousness. He said they didn't think he was ready for college. Sal said cumming on a pillow might do that. Pete said he's not sure if he did that. He said he doesn't remember doing it. Pete said he can say he didn't do it. Howard said he could teach Donald Trump a lesson about testifying with this. He said he just has to say he doesn't remember. Howard asked why he would jerk off on his own pillow. Pete said that's a good point. Robin said he wasn't thinking. Pete said he thinks he pissed the guy off a lot. He said that might have done it for getting him out of there. Howard said maybe the guy said he did it just to get him kicked out of school.

  Gary asked what it was he did to piss the guy off. Pete said he would come back into the room late at night and he would wake the guy up. He said he did get pissed off about that. He said that may have driven him to the office. Howard asked if he makes a lot of noise at night. Pete said he does. He said he likes to listen to music on his headphones. He said he might make other noises.

  Howard said Pete is very sexual. He said he's out looking for a woman. He asked how long it's been since he had sex. Pete said it's been 3 years. Howard said he's been masturbating a lot. He said that drives him crazy. Pete said it does. Richard asked if he has the sores on his wiener today. Pete said he's not sure. He said you can't really tell.

  Howard said he's got to say that he has a bigger penis than Richard and Sal. He said that's impressive. Howard asked Pete if he's excited to be on TV. Pete said it is a rush. Howard asked if he likes that Chris is staring at it. Pete said he sees that. Chris said he has a nice cock and balls too. He said a lot of people criticize it. He said he even has a nice ass. He said he'd give it a 7 out of 10.

  Gary said there's a lot of red bumps above his penis. Pete said that's from jerking off a lot. Chris said that Pete has toe nails like talons. Pete said he hasn't cut them in a while. He said he forgets about these things.

  Howard asked if Chris is getting turned on by this. Chris said he was about to have sex with him and then he saw his toe nails. Howard said he must rip through his socks with those nails.

  Howard said in a show of peace and sportsmanship they're going to have Pete perform. He said they have their Cockathletes there to compete. He said he has to say that he hasn't seen anyone perform music nude since Anthony Kiedis and Flea. JD said that they seem very happy and free in there performing naked. Gary said Sal is the most ridiculous. He said he makes his penis move and he locks eyes with him. Sal said he really likes to do that to Gary.

  Howard asked Pete about Sal and Richard's cocks. Pete said Sal has something going on. He said Richard is like a pin dick. Chris said that Richard's ass is littered with zits. Richard bent over and showed it to everyone.

  Howard said we have to get this all started. He got to the main event which was Pete singing. Howard asked if he has any plans to move out of the house. Pete said not right now. Howard said Pete is very conscious about his penis and not smacking it into anything. Pete said he has never injured it before and he's afraid he will. Richard said he's about to smack Derek with it.

  Howard asked Pete if he'd ever do OnlyFans. Pete said he has people who have told him to do it. He said he could do that. Howard said they're going to open the show with a song parody about Pete to the tune of Thunder Road. He played that song parody.

  Howard had Pete sing ''Purple Vein'' into his own penis. Pete went into that song and had JD giggling at him. Howard said Richard and Sal are nude behind him. He said Pete is singing into his penis and Richard and Sal have their arms up waving. He said Richard has put on some weight. Chris said he looks pregnant. Chris said Howard got to be there with Bruce but he got to be in there with Medicated Pete.

  Howard said he can't thank Pete enough for that. He said using the penis as a microphone was great. He asked if Pete has anything to add. Pete said it was good to see them. Howard moved on to the next event.

• Dickathlon - Penis Fishing. 11/02/22. 8:45am
  Howard said they're moving on to Penis Fishing. He said Richard is laying on the floor with fish on his ass. He said Sal is going to go fishing with his penis. He said he has a condom on with a magnet in it. Sal said that will be the fishing hook. Howard asked Memet what will happen. Memet said that they both get a shot at this. He said he'll be timing for 60 seconds and he'll give a whistle when the time is up. Then they'll count the fish and see who gets the most. Howard said this looks like the set of a gay movie. Chris said this is the gayest thing he's ever been a part of. He said this makes Andy Cohen's channel look like Outlaw Country.

  Howard asked Richard what his strategy is. Richard said he's going to give him a fair shot. He said he's going to play fair today. Howard said now they're going to get some quiet so they can concentrate. Howard said Richard is spreading his ass so he has a good shot at finding the fish. Memet said that he can say he's ready and he'll start the timer. Howard did his thing and the guys started in. Chris said this is so gay. He said ''Oh my god!'' Sal was trying and Richard said his dick is in his ass. Memet said they're 35 seconds in. Sal had about 3 fish by that point. Sal kept going and there was a lot of grunting going on. Sal said his thighs are numb.

  The whistle blew and Sal had 5 fish. Howard said that's incredible. Howard asked how Richard felt about that. Richard said that he had his wiener all over his cheeks and thighs. He said it wasn't arousing at all. Gary said they've been talking about this for weeks and he was hot prepared at all for what happened. He said Sal was grabbing his ass and opening it up like he was fucking him. Howard said one of the things was that he forgot to throw one fish in the net.

  Howard had the guys switch places. Richard said he has white stuff in his asshole. Sal said he bets that it's toilet paper. Howard had the guys start a few seconds later. Richard was going in fishing. Sal asked what he's doing back there. He said he's not used to this. Richard had his dick on Sal's thigh. Sal sounded like he was going to throw up. Richard had four fish and kept going. Richard said he's moving around too much. Sal asked why he's in his ass. He said he's fucking his ass.

  Memet blew the whistle and he only had 4 fish. Chris said Richard's gunt got in his way. Howard asked Sal what's going on. Sal said what didn't happen. Richard said he was having a tough time getting in here. He said he was moving around too much. Howard said Sal was moving around a lot. Richard said he'll give this to Sal. Memet said Richard lost with 4 fish to Sal's 5. Chris said it was very sexual when Richard's cock was on Sal's thigh just laying there. Howard asked when he came up with the technique he used. Richard said he just came up with it. He said he thinks Chris was right about his belly being in the way.

  Howard said Sal is completely nude except for his cross around his neck. Richard said Jesus loves when Sal does this stuff.

• Dickathlon - Tai-Kwon-Dong. 11/02/22. 8:55am
  Howard said what's next is Tai-Kwon-Dong which is where Sal and Richard are going to try to chop hard spaghetti while JD and Gary hold the uncooked spaghetti. Howard said they're going to see who can break the most. Howard said JD and Gary are holding it and Derek is there holding a microphone.

  Howard had Sal go first. Sal broke a strand. Richard broke one. They went back and forth trying to break them. They were holding different numbers. They kept telling JD to hold it tight. JD said he knows.

  Sal broke two out of four strands that the guys were holding. They had to have a tie breaker so they went for four more. Richard went and tried chopping the four but he missed and didn't break any. Sal went for six at a time. Gary said he just needs four. Sal said he'll go for four then. He did his chop and broke all four. Howard said Sal wins again. He said being uncircumcised must be an advantage. Sal said it really is.

  Howard said Richard has to try on this next event. He said he has lost two already. Richard said Gary looks like he's shaking Gary said he had pubes in his hand so of course he is.

• Dickathlon - Cock Golf. 11/02/22. 9:00am
  Howard said now they're going to play golf. He said Richard is going to have his asshole gaping and Sal will be putting into it from about 8 feet away. Chris said he's getting a whiff of something from Sal. He said it smells like ass. He said he can smell it with his cologne. Sal said it should smell like ass, it's ass. Howard asked Sal what he's doing now. Sal said he's stretching his penis. Sal did his putt after a minute. He hit his ball not a corner. Howard said he's about a foot from Richard's asshole. Sal said Richard's asshole is a mess. He went in for the second putt and missed the ball. They gave him another shot. Sal hit the ball and missed again. Sal said he's got it. He hit the ball again and it went toward his ass but it turned around and went the other way. Howard said during rehearsal Sal was able to do it in two strokes. He said now he's on the other side of the course. Sal was out of breath. He said he was in a push up mode and he was trying to hit the ball with his cock. He said it's not that easy. He shot again and missed. He eventually hit it and it went into Richard's asshole.

  Howard said good try there. He said Richard may win now. He said Sal is now on his back so his asshole is open for Richard. Richard got ready to hit the ball. Richard said look at Sal's asshole. Howard said let Richard concentrate now. Richard did his thing and swung his dick and hit the ball. It came close to Sal's ass. Howard said he's about 2 inches away. Robin said she'd say that's about 6 inches. Richard went over and knocked the ball not his ass in one more dick-putt.

  Howard said this was fantastic. He said they have to talk to the Cockletes. Sal said he needs a nap after that. He said he's glad that Richard won one. He said he has to thank everyone. He was giving a long speech for his win. Howard said Sal won but Richard did okay. He said they were both tremendous competitors. Sal and Richard hugged it out. They said they love each other.

• Dickathlon - Michael Rapaport Spanks Richard Christy. 11/02/22. 9:10am
  Howard said Richard is in a jock strap now. Richard said he did that so Michael Rapaport doesn't smack his balls.

  Howard asked what happened with Richard and Michael. Richard said that Michael was upset about the way they were playing their fantasy football league. He said that he was using this Inured Reserve spot the wrong way. He said Michael was pissed and he said he could spank him over it and he agreed.

  Howard said Michael is working on Life and Beth with Amy Schumer and on Only Murders in the Building. Michael came in and said that he's shocked that Howard didn't come in for this after doing the Bruce Springsteen thing. He said this whole thing is disgusting. Howard said it really is. He asked Richard o show Michael his ass flap. Michael told him to get that thing away from him.

  Howard said JD is in the room with him as well. Michael said when you're in front of the guys it's different than on the air. He said when he's in front of the guys his heart races. He said he feels the same way Howard felt with Bruce. He said he's star struck in a way. Howard said he's actually smiling. Michael said he really loves these guys. He said he's a fan of the show and that's why he's there. He said he is the commissioner of Howard's fantasy football league. He said it's being run into the ground. Howard said he took it over because he felt it was being poorly run. Howard said now he's saying he's fed up and wants out. Michael said that it's not as fun as it used to be. He said they don't give each other a hard time like they should be doing.

  Howard said he knows Michael loves to trash talk but the fantasy football league is about football and playing the game. Michael said it's about the communal aspect of the game and the sport. Howard said Michael is looking very good and fit. Michael said in July he had pneumonia and he got fit after that. He said he's been doing a lot to stay fit lately. He said you might see him planking out in Central Park. He said he's up to 5 and a half minutes planking. Howard said he's impressed. He said he's not doing a good job himself so he's impressed.

  Howard said JD should go out with Michael. JD said he's not in the city anymore. He said he would if he was.

  Howard said Richard really wants him to do this. Richard said he deserves it. He said he offered it up so he'll take it from him. He said that they're going to do it. Howard said this is real trash talking. He said this is a one of a kind event. Michael said when he's spanking his ass he wants to see Chris cry so play some Post Malone.

  Howard asked what's going on with Michael and Chris. Michael explained why he's upset with Chris and what he did to Andy Cohen when he called in. Chris and Michael were yelling at each other and Howard was having a hard time getting a word in.

  Howard said they have to get down to why Michael is there. Richard said he's getting really angry and he's going to take it out on him. Howard said this channel is now gayer than Andy's channel. He asked if Michael agrees. Michael said its the gayest in the world.

  Howard said it's getting late in the show so the have to get to this. He said Richard is getting punished but he's not even sure what he did wrong. Michael said he basically cheated. All the guys were saying it wasn't cheating but Michael said it is. Michael blamed Jason for that. He said he didn't tell him that he had to set things up the right way. Michael said Jason is walking around in a suit looking really good. Howard had Jason come in to show off his new look. Jason thanked him for the nice comments. He said he's not used to that from Michael. The guys said this is the first time Jason came into the studio without the floor shaking.

  Howard asked Michael if he has ever spanked a nude man before. Michael said he has not but he's been practicing his swing. Robin said she's not sure he'll be okay on that stool. Michael said he'll be fine. Richard asked if he had to ask for time off from Only Murders in the Building. Michael said he's not shooting it right now. Chris said he had a nice dig at Howard in that show. Michael said it was an homage to him so any homage is fine.

  Howard had Richard go over to get spanked by Michael. Fred played the squeal like a pig sound from Deliverance. Richard went over and got over Michael's lap. Howard asked if he's comfortable. Richard said no but it's fine. Howard asked if his penis is rubbing into his thigh. Richard said it's not but he could if he wants. Michael said there's no reason for that. He asked what his life has come to. Chris asked if he remembers being in True Romance. Michael asked if he can start. Howard said go ahead. Michael started spanking Richard. Richard was letting out some painful ''Owwww!'' sounds. Michael told him to be a good fucking hillbilly. He had one more shot for him. Richard said he won't use that IR spot wrong again.

  Howard said that looked painful. Richard showed him his ass and it was red. Michael said that he told them he was going to run the league with an iron fist. He said that JD won't fuck around with the IR. Chris said he might want to get spanked. Howard said he might have popped some pimples back there. He said he hopes Richard learned his lesson. Richard said he did.

  Howard said what a great morning it's been. He said this might have been Michael's best role ever. Michael said he's rather be smacking Booey's lips than Richard's ass but he'll take what he can get. The guys said Richard really does have a red ass. Michael said he had to do what he had to do. He said he has to keep the fantasy football league in line.

  Gary said with the smacking the pimples are raised like a Light-Brite. Robin said someone said it looks like Braille. She wondered what it says. Someone said ''Help me'' and someone said ''I'm Gay.''

  Howard said he has to say that they had some fun today. He said they're going to put this on Broadway. He said it's going to be the biggest show in history. He said they have some lotion for Sal to put on Richard's ass if he wants to. Sal said he'll do that. Sal got the lotion and put it on Richard's ass. Michael said if they don't get canceled for this then nothing will get them canceled.

  Howard thanked everyone for coming in today. He asked how Amy Schumer is to work with. Michael said it's a lot of fun. He said she's great. Howard asked if Michael gets to do scenes with Steve Martin and Martin Short. Michael said of course he does. He said he's not a bit player. Howard said those guys are great. He asked what it's like to work with them. Michael said when they walked in the room he was tripping out. He said it was Steve Martin in the room with him. He said he still looks like Steve Martin at 76 years old. He said they work really hard too. He said you see that their greatness wasn't accidental.

  Howard asked if he tries to work extra hard when he's working with them. Michael said he works at the same level. He said he was tripping at first and he was huge fans of theirs so he was very excited to work with them. He said when he's in front of them he thinks it's really cool. Howard asked if he ever ad-libs a line or sticks to the script. Michael said he did plenty of that. He said you don't bring it up, you just do it. He said great actors and directors you don't need to talk to them about it. He said they want you to be free and comfortable. He said he made Steve Martin laugh once off camera and that was great.

  Howard thanked Michael for coming in and doing what he did today. Robin said that was a great interview he just did with Michael. She said that some day they can use that tape of him and it'll show him next to two naked guys. Michael said he got 4 minutes but he's happy to be there so that's fine.

  Howard said he wishes everyone a happy and girthy Cocktober. He wrapped up the Dickathlon and played a song to end the segment. Howard did a live commercial read and then went to break.

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• Pranking Bobo. 11/02/22. 9:45am
  After the break they played a ''Priest and Boy'' bit and Lauryn Hill's ''Doo Wop (That Thing)''

  Howard came back and talked about the song they had playing. Howard read some details about Lauryn Hill and wondered what she's up to. Robin said she thinks she's touring. Howard said she thinks so but she doesn't know so. Robin said she hears things. Howard said he always thought she was sexy. He said he bets she doesn't talk much when you hang around with her. He said she does a lot of talking in her songs.

  Howard said he sees Bobo is on the phone. He said he has something to play that they did with Bobo. He said he has a lot of fan feedback too. He said they did a Bobo prank where they took tape of Sylvester Stallone from his Twitter feed and said they were going to have him call Bobo. He said Bobo fell for it. He said there's something wrong with him. He said he didn't know that he never figured it out. Bobo was on the line so Howard picked up and he was claiming he figured it out. Howard said they played complete nonsense and Bobo finally figured it out. He said he was taking advice from a piece of tape. He said they had to play something so stupid that he had to figure it out.

  Howard said this is Bobo's guy Sylvester Stallone. Bobo said he has such inspirational stuff on his Instagram. He said he loves that stuff. Howard said he has 15 million followers on Instagram. He played an example of what Stallone says in his posts. Stallone was talking about how he talks to people like he knows them. He said he's drawing from his past when he's talking to people. Howard said there's tons of that kind of stuff on his account. He played a montage of other inspirational things that he says.

  Howard said Bobo loves this stuff. He said earlier this year Bobo got some advice from a bunch of celebrities. He said they were trying to get Bobo to ask better questions. Howard said they came up with this bit and Jon Blitt came up with it and called Bobo. He played a clip of Blitt telling Bobo that Stallone wanted to talk to Bobo. Bobo said he's up for it. He said he'll clear his calendar for this. He said he was at a loss for words there. That led to Fred doing his Bobo Puppet impression and had him saying he was at a loss for words but he was saying all kinds of words about how excited he was.

  Howard said Bobo is a huge fan and he had all kinds of Stallone stuff that he was showing off. Howard said Bobo was telling fake Stallone how much he loves Rocky. He said it sounds scripted. Howard played the clip and Bobo was going on and on about how great he is. He was even giving him plugs for stuff he has coming up. He sounded like he was shaking talking to fake Stallone.

  Howard asked Bobo how he calls him Sly when he doesn't even know the guy. He said have a conversation. Howard said it was really 15 minutes long of Bobo just going on and on. He said he gave him full plugs. He said he's not doing a show, he's just talking to the guy. Bobo said he was just excited to get that out and talking to the guy. He said he's a real fan of his. He was just enjoying it.

  Howard said they gave Bobo random advice that made no sense but Bobo made it make sense to himself. Howard played an example of that. They had Stallone telling him that old skin must be shed so they can evolve. They had other things like that and Bobo took that stuff and made sense of it in his own way.

  Howard said the audio clips and Bobo were really hitting it off. Robin said he can really relate to a tape. Howard said Bobo wanted Stallone's advice on a question he had for the show. Howard played a clip of Bobo asking Stallone for advice on what he wanted to ask Howard about. They played a random clip of Stallone talking about life being a juggling act. Bobo made sense of that somehow.

  Howard said this went on and on. Chris Wilding said they take great effort to make the drops sound real but they didn't do that with Bobo. He said he has his own agenda and he knows what he wants to hear and he fills in the gaps. He said you could put him on with a toaster and he wouldn't care. Howard said they tried to make it seem like the tapes were coming on to him sexually and Bobo fell for it. He said they were hoping he'd figure it out by then but he didn't. Howard played a clip and Bobo was telling Stallone about how great he is and then Stallone asked if he's single and if he would like to dance. Bobo said he's a straight guy. Then they played a movie clip with music in it. Bobo just kept talking to him like he still thought it was real Sylvester.

  Howard said this went on for a really long time. He said they told Bobo that Sylvester had to go. He played the clip where they broke the news to Bobo that he had to go. Bobo was asking for more advice for his questions. They had Stallone tell him that it's not over till it's over. Then they had Stallone say ''Fuck you'' to Bobo. Howard said it didn't sound like Bobo had a clue.

  Chris said Blitt checked in with him at the end and he was still thinking it was really him. The guys all loved the ''fuck you'' at the end of that clip.

  Howard took a call from High Pitch Erik who was doing his Stallone impression in his deep voice. He was goofing on Bobo for falling for that. Howard said this might be High Pitch. Erik said this is Rocky Balboa. He said this isn't High Pitch, he's Sylvester Stallone. Howard asked if Bobo has any questions for him. Bobo asked which Rocky he liked doing the most. Erik said he likes number 2 because every time he takes a dump he thinks of Bobo. Erik said he thought that one up himself. He said he's smarter than Bobo.

  Howard was going to have Bobo ask more questions but that was going on too long so he ended it. Howard said he hopes Erik is doing well. Erik said he is. He said he thought Bruce Springsteen was remarkable. Bobo said it really was. He asked if Howard has re-thought his own career after talking to Bruce. Howard didn't answer and asked fake Stallone to answer. Erik said that was a retarded question.

  Howard said it was nice to see Bruce going on all cylinders. He said he did think about that. He said that did give him food for thought. Bobo said he loved hearing that he has a notebook full of thoughts. Howard said the real Sylvester Stallone is on the phone now. He took a call from another fake Stallone who told Bobo not to let these guys get him down. Howard said he thinks this is the real guy. Bobo said it is. Fake Stallone kept saying the same thing about not letting people get you down.

• Fan Feedback And Phone Calls. 11/02/22. 10:10am
  Howard said to end the show he's going to read some fan feedback. He read more about the Bruce Springsteen interview. He said Nils Loftgren tweeted about the interview and how great Bruce sounded. Howard said he wanted to ask Bruce about Nils. He said he wanted to ask about this thing he saw where Nils sings with Bruce. Howard asked Gary if he knows what song that is. Gary said it's called ''If I Should Fall Behind.'' He said it's one of his favorite songs. He said they all harmonize in the song and it's great.

  Howard read more feedback about the interview and his talk about how nervous he was going into it. Howard said for him it was how much love Bruce was sending his way. He said it was just so good. He said it was a real highlight.

  Howard read more feedback and fans were writing in about how great it was. Howard said he'll take that again anytime. He said Bruce wants to come in and he's ready for him to come in at any time. Howard said he doesn't want to be a pain in his ass so he won't bug him about it. Howard said he'd like a part 2, 3, 4 or 5. He said he hasn't thought it through and asked to put a date on the books. Robin said he said it twice while he was there and then off the air. Howard said he's not going to be pushy. Robin said he's saying he wants to do it again. Howard asked what he should do. Robin said maybe ask him to do it sometime soon maybe at the beginning of the year or something. Howard said she should do it then. Robin said she doesn't have his number.

  Howard said he realizes that he has to ask him to do that and he learned it from Bachelor in Paradise. He said this guy let a girl go on another date with a guy instead of telling her he wanted her to himself. He said he should ask Bruce to come in again. He said maybe Nils is listening and he can tell him what he's thinking.

  Howard read more feedback about the interview. Howard said he had fun today too with the Dickathlon. Robin said that she was watching Michael having a real interview with Howard and Richard and Sal are standing next to him.

  Howard said a fan took a shot at what Hungry Heart would have sounded like if the Ramones had taken it from Bruce. He played the song and said there you go. He said it has a catchy rhythm to it. Howard said he thinks Joey would have done something different with it.

  Howard said they got some feedback about Medicated Pete's visit to the nude beach. He said fans pointed out that you can't go up to women and ask them to rate your penis.

  Howard said Richard had a Halloween special and he saw the costume that was the cum hat and it was very good.

  Howard took a call from a guy who said he wanted to say he's a big fan and the interviews brought him back after he fell out for a while. He said the Bruce interview was really good. He said the David Crosby interview brought him back to the show. Howard said that guy is good too. He said they've had so many good people come in there. The caller said Neil young and Molly Shannon was great too. He said Howard asks the questions that people don't ask. He said no one asks the questions that Howard asks. Howard thanked him for the call.

  Howard took a call from a woman who said she wanted to ask Robin if she ever gets grossed out looking at everyone's packages there and has she ever walked out. Robin said she doesn't think of them as men. She said they're specimens. Howard asked if she enjoys seeing their penises. Robin said it is fascinating. She said you wonder where that thing is and what it's doing when they walk around. Howard said it's funny because Beth wonders about that too. He said he says her tits are hanging out so it's the same thing. She says they're in a bra. Howard said he has his in his underwear. Robin said it is interesting to watch. She said Sal has that anteater. She said the penises don't look alike. She said that she was looking at Sal and his penis looked like Heidi Klum's worm costume.

  Howard asked if Robin gets turned on at all. Robin said not at all. She said she did like seeing Pete's penis but it was stuck on a mess. Howard asked if she enjoys seeing that stuff. Robin said sure. She said that women do wonder what it's like for a man to have that thing hanging there. She said that Chris likes penis and he likes to see it and might get aroused but she's looking at it in a clinical way. She said guys are so weird with their penises too.

  Howard said that men worry about their eyes and their penis. He said it's such a vulnerable thing. He asked if Robin could imagine where she could overlook Pete's flaws and want that penis. Robin said she has to have the whole package, not just the package. Howard said she can't just think about that penis and balls and do something. Robin said not at all. She said that some guys can find one thing about a woman and concentrate on that but she can't do that with a guy. She said that he can't make any noise or have any ticks and she might be able to get into something like that.

  The caller said thanks for taking her call. She said Robin is the best thing to happen to Howard. Howard said she's right. He said he knows that. The caller said she loves Robin and loves hearing her voice every day. Howard said he has quality people around him every day.

  Sal said he is very hurt that Robin would want to exterminate his penis. Robin said she didn't say that. She said it looks like something that should be. Sal said he would like to send her a picture of his erect penis to see if she changes her mind about it. Robin said she has seen it. She said she saw the erect penis dildo and it was fine. Sal said there you go. He said she likes his penis. Howard said the truth is that in the right circumstance that Robin would play with his penis if he wasn't married. Robin asked if that's what's holding her back. Howard said he thinks so. He said he thinks that she would be romantic with Sal. Howard said he thinks that Sal could be her type. He said he's in good shape and has a pleasant face. He said personality aside. He said he has said some dumb things like contacting the dead and the dimes and trees things. He said that if Robin didn't know all of that then she might be attracted to him. Robin said maybe if he didn't open his mouth. Sal said maybe if he opened his mouth to go down on her. Robin said sometimes Sal acts normal. Howard said hearing this he's going to take it all back. He said maybe they should exterminate his penis.

  Howard took a call from a guy who asked who is Robin's type. He said she turned down Clarence Clemons and then went out with Jim Florentine. Howard said he's thinking Bruce or Brad Pitt or maybe President Obama. He said maybe Harry Styles. He said that's who would be in contention. Robin said she heard that Harry Styles might be getting engaged and she was upset about that. Howard said maybe Jake Gyllenhaal. He said maybe even Hosier. Robin said he only has that one hit. Howard said it is a good song.

  Howard said the full interview with Bruce will be up on the app this afternoon. He said the whole thing will be there. Robin said she can't wait to watch that again. Howard said overlook how bad he looks. He said Bruce looks great but he looks really bad. He said people are mean and they will talk about how bad he looks. He said he begged them to blur his face in the app but they refused. Howard said he wore the wrong thing that day. He said Ralph pulled out an outfit to wear but it was just too much. He said he wanted ad nice jacket and something like that and instead it went all wrong.

  Howard said they have the Richard Christy Halloween special coming up soon too. Howard answered a knock at the door and it was fake George Lucas who said they could change his outfit with CGI if he wants to. He said his show would look wonderful in 4K too. Howard spent a minute talking to fake George about that. George said they can make Howard's face less sickening as well if he wants. Howard said he's his hero. George said they can add a new ending where Bruce beheads Howard with a light saber too. Howard let him go and said that Conan O'Brien will be on next Tuesday. Robin asked if he's still number 1 on his list of interviews. Howard said he has to bring in his guitar and reclaim his title. He said he plays guitar pretty well so he should do that.

  Howard answered a knock at the door and it was fake Owen Wilson who was asking if he missed the Dickathlon. Howard said they're done with that. Howard stuck with that bit for a minute and closed the door on him. He ended the show around 10:35am

• Thursday Replay Show - Monday Encore. 11/03/22. 7:00am
  This morning's replay was an encore of Monday's Howard Stern Show. You can read details for this week's live shows above. Here's what they played this morning:
  • Back In Studio - Preparing For Bruce. 10/31/22. 7:10am
  • Traveling Into The City And Visiting Mom. 10/31/22. 7:30am
  • A Couple Of Phone Calls. 10/31/22. 8:00am
  • A New Phony Phone Call. 10/31/22. 8:10am
  • Calls, Fan Feedback And More. 10/31/22. 8:20am
  • Bruce Springsteen Visits. 10/31/22. 8:50am

• Friday Replay Show - Tuesday Encore. 11/04/22. 7:00am
  This morning's replay was an encore of Tuesday's Howard Stern Show. You can read details for this week's live shows above. Here's what they played this morning:
  • Back Home - Recapping The Springsteen Interview. 11/01/22. 7:00am
  • Howard's Mom Updated About The Bruce Interview. 11/01/22. 8:00am
  • Calls And Cocktober Extends To Cockvember. 11/01/22. 8:10am
  • Medicated Pete At A Nude Beach. 11/01/22. 8:30am
  • Howard Takes Some Calls. 11/01/22. 8:55am
  • Fan Feedback And A New Phony Phone Call. 11/01/22. 9:40am
  • Dying On Air, Harvey Weinstein's Balls And More. 11/01/22. 9:45am
  • The End Of 92.3 K-Rock. 11/01/22. 9:55am