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Howard started the show talking about Fred playing the ''Hey now!'' too much. He cut the music off too. Howard asked how Robin's vice is doing. Robin said she's okay. Howard said it is better. Robin said she hasn't spoken since they last did a show. Howard said she really got hit hard.
Howard said today's show should be interesting. He said that he said something would never happen and it's happening today. He said that's what their guest is all about. Robin asked if they should guess. Howard said no. He said don't ruin the voice doing that.
Howard said he's not sure why he's keeping it a secret. He said they'll let the guest announce it. He said he has said this is something that would never happen and it is happening. He said he would believe that Jesus is coming back before this would happen. He said something has happened that he never thought would happen. He said he knows the guesses. He said people think he's transitioning or Fred is in black face. He said the other guess is that Trump and Hillary will make out on the show today.
Howard said today's guest will be two guests. He said that's all he'll say about that. Robin said she always loves to have secrets revealed on the show. Howard said he's excited about it too.
Howard said he has to take some phone calls. Robin asked Fred to hold up the Gary Puppet. She said she didn't get enough of it last week. Howard said he loves it but he's also partial to the old puppet. Robin said it's all of the facial hair and the hair on his head that gets her. She said he has this deep dark moustache. Howard said he was going to get to that later. He said a lot of fans wrote in about it. He said he agrees with some of them.
Howard read some of the fan feedback about the new Gary puppet. People were writing in about how great he is but also saying that he's too handsome and not beaver-ish enough. Howard said he agrees with that. He said the teeth are a little too nice. Gary asked if Robin didn't get sleep last night. He said she's goofing on him. Robin said they're talking about the puppet. Gary said they're talking about him and they know it.
Howard read more feedback about the puppet and Fred did some of his Gary impression with the puppet.
Howard took a call from a guy who said happy Veteran's day. He was a veteran himself. Howard said people aren't making a big enough deal about it today. The caller said that people tell him about his service and it was his pleasure to serve. Howard said it wasn't everyone's pleasure to serve. He said some people stepped up for Iraq and Afghanistan. He said people stepped up for Vietnam and wars like that. He said today is about the people who went over and fought. He said the thing he doesn't like about Veteran's day is when politicians promise veteran benefits and no one comes through. He said it's a disgrace.
Robin said they say it takes months and months of paperwork to get them into the system. Howard said if they elected him president he'd say that you need an adult in office who can steer a few initiatives. He said one thing he'd do is clean up the veteran benefits. He said Obama got the health care thing done and this is the one thing he'd get done.
Howard said not to paint Trump as an asshole because he has donated to the Vets but he's not doing anything about this VA thing. He said it might be worse now. He said he should spend a day cleaning up that situation. The caller said he appreciates Howard saying that.
Howard and Robin were talking about what Trump did for the Vets. Howard said Trump gave a million to this thing to help the veterans. He said he doesn't want to see a president fail. He said none of them have succeeded in cleaning up the benefits for the vets.
Howard said he used to think that Michael Bloomberg didn't give a shit but he's just one of these guys who wants to serve. He said this guy isn't afraid of anything and he's a public servant extrordinaire. He said if you spend time in New York it's the business capital of the world. He said he has about 10 people in his life that are top investment guys. He said that he doesn't know shit about Wall Street but he asks what's going on in this world and he says they're afraid of what's going to happen if Elizabeth Warren gets elected. He said the stock market is doing well because of the tax rates being low for corporations. He said you sit and listen to them and they are good predictors of it. He said you need to go with a middle of the road candidate. He said Biden is saying they want to continue the health care. He said he seems to be the right direction for the democrats. He said Warren is a good woman and he has nothing against Sanders but they can't beat Trump. He said they have to get the disenfranchised republicans. Howard said all you have to do to win is get someone who can be in charge. He said Bloomberg could be that guy. Robin said he could make things work. Howard said he's an adult in charge. He said he was able to do it in business and he did it as a public servant.
Howard said he thinks Sanders and Warren are fine people. He said he's not sure they're right to be President.
Howard said Bloomberg is a monster of business. He said the only problem sis that he's 77 years old. He said he's a good common sense kind of candidate. He said we'll have to see what happens.
Howard said Judge Judy is a big Bloomberg fan. He said she was on Bill Maher's show talking about how she was risking her career trying to get him to run. He said he wondered what she was talking about.
Howard said Judge Judy is a common sense kind of woman. He said she's for Bloomberg. He said he hardly thinks she's brave and risking her career doing that. He said we'll have to see how things shake out. He said he has no beef with Bloomberg at all. He said he was brilliant when he was Mayor of New York City.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he wanted to get a painting update. He asked what Howard is working on these days. Howard said he's painting a lot. He said this job is interfering with his painting. He said you need a lot of time to paint. He said he's gotten into a thing where he's painting in Sepia. He said it's almost like black and white but it's brownish. He said it's like old photographs. The caller didn't know what that was. Howard said he's doing a bunch of sepia paintings of beach scenes. He said he's very pleased with them too. He said he has one completed and a few more in the works. He said he's working on a really large one eventually. He said he's doing some small ones that are 10x14. He said that's what he's up to.
Robin said she tried to send him an email yesterday and it bounced back to her. Howard said he didn't change his email.
Howard said Beetlejuice had a song called ''Bad as Can'' that was so great. He said Beetlejuice said he was the best and who does that? Howard said no one ever does that. He played some of Beet's song. Howard said they have some great drumming on that song. He asked if it won 1 or 2 Grammys.
Howard said that Leslie West is one of the greatest musicians in history. He said Beetlejuice worked with Leslie too. He said they made some magic. Howard asked Fred if he has that. Fred said he's working on that now. Howard said he heard from Leslie who just wrote ''Hey man.'' He said that was the whole email. He said that was it. He said he didn't even go into the body of the email.
Howard asked if the guys are going to help him find that song. Gary said they're working on it. They finally got it to him. Howard said pay attention to the guitar work on this one. He played the song which had Beetlejuice singing and Leslie playing guitar on it. Howard laughed as that was playing. Howard said Beetlejuice doesn't know a thing and he admits it in the song.
Howard said when you think about the song catalog on this kid he thinks he lives off of that alone. Howard had more of his songs to play so he asked Robin what she wanted to hear. Robin wanted to hear ''I'm in the House'' by Beetlejuice. Howard said when he writes a song a new phrase is born. He said no one said that ''in the house'' until Beetlejuice said it. Howard played that song where Beetlejuice is singing about getting his dick sucked. Howard said a lot of bands keep it quiet but Beetlejuice just says it.
Howard said Tom Brady listens to that song every day when he's doing his stretching exercises. He said he's stretching to it right now. He said that's the secret to his success.
Howard said some people say that ''Money, Money, Pussy'' is Beet's biggest song. Howard played some of that song too. Howard said he also left rock behind to do rap. He said that surprised everyone.
Howard said they said that Beetlejuice is a great rock star but his rap career was equally as great. He said that's what the critics were saying. Howard played more of his music. He played one where Beetlejuice sang about making a bitch scream.
Howard said many people have covered his music. He said that Staind covered ''This is Beetle.'' He said it brought the house down. Howard played their cover of the song. Howard said it's hypnotic. He let the song play for a short time. He said that's Aaron singing on that one. He said that he knows that Beetlejuice was pleased with that cover. He said he acts like he doesn't give a shit but he really does. Howard said he asked Beetlejuice what he thinks of this version of the song and Beetlejuice said ''Who me?''
Howard said he heard that Beetlejuice eats shoes to this song. He said he believes that Beet's royalties on this song are like $500. He said it's fantastic. He said his music career has amazed him.
Howard said he has so many other Beetlejuice songs but he doesn't have time to play them. He played another one where Beetlejuice was singing about being in love called ''People in Love.'' Howard said he has that unusual recording that Beetlejuice did. He said this blew people's minds. He said he changed styles with that one.
Howard said he has ''Texas song'' too. He played some of that and asked if Robin remembers that. Beetlejuice sang about Texas in that one.
Howard said it's fantastic stuff. He said he always talks about Beetlejuice being a diva. He said like every artist he's hard to work with. He played some audio of a recording session.
Howard took a call from Mariann from Brooklyn who said she was thinking about who the guests are. She guessed that it was Roseanne Barr and Andrew Dice Clay. Howard asked if she has seen them in the studio together before. Mariann said maybe not. Howard said he's not going to give it away. Mariann said she's trying to figure it out.
Howard said Mariann sent him a voicemail about Benjy where she was screaming. Howard read some email about last week's shows. He had some feedback about Robin coming in even when she's not feeling well. Howard said someone said she's a trooper for doing that. Howard said some people found her irritating. Howard said someone said she should not be on the air with a voice like that.
Howard said he's happy any time Robin is in there. He said that he likes to do the show with her. He said some days you don't have a voice when you wake up but then you get to work and it's fine.
Howard read more email about last week's shows and about Mark the Bagger. Howard read some of those emails about Mark. someone suggested they have him in for Hollyweird Squares. Howard read some feedback about Benjy and his L.A. trip. Howard said Mariann sent him a voicemail about Benjy. He played that too. Mariann said that Benjy is a con artist and he's very rude when he's in studio. She said there are plenty of geniuses in the sea and they don't need that Benjy baggage in there. Mariann said there are just 134 shows left and Benjy is pulling that crap. Howard said all he heard in that was the 134 shows. He said he's not sure how he'll get through that.
Howard read more email about Benjy and people were asking why they haven't fired him yet. Howard said someone wrote in about how Benjy is definitely mentally ill and Robin was right about that. Howard said Benjy did have some supporters. He said they liked the Fully Capable Benjy bit. He read some of that feedback.
Howard took a call from caller Pocket who asked how familiar he is with the phrase ''OK Boomer.'' Howard said he heard about it over the weekend. He said younger people are using that phrase when they hear an older person saying something they don't like. He said they're referring to the baby boomers. Howard said he loves the phrase. He said he loves a good put down. He said he has said this since his 20s and 30s. He said he would say that his generation is the most selfish generation. He said he used to look at his generation and think about them being in charge. He said he was worried about it. He said he figured they were going to fuck everything up. Robin said he used to tell her that and she thought that was crazy. Howard said the best Baby Boomer was Bill Clinton. He said people do talk about the Monica Lewinsky thing but he was a good public servant. He said he really was. He said he acted like an adult other than the sex. He said he got caught. He said he likes this OK Boomer thing. He said they better take things into their own hands because the world is a mess.
Pocket asked if anyone has said it to Howard yet. Howard said not yet. He said he thinks the younger people think of him as one of them. Pocket asked if he knows the younger people lingo. He asked if he knows what ''Dead'' means if someone says it. Howard said they're dead. Pocket said that they're talking about something being so funny that they died laughing. Pocket asked if he knows what snack means. Howard said it means his cock is delicious. Pocket said it means someone is hot. Pocket asked if he knows what a Visco girl is. Howard wasn't sure. Pocket said it's someone who clings to environmentalism to seem cool.
Howard said he doesn't care about this stuff. He went through a few more with Pocket and then let him go.
Howard said the young kids have to know what a blumpkin is. He said that's where a woman blows a guy while he's taking a dump on a toilet. He said guys smell so bad. He said he can't imagine someone doing that. Howard said he has to take a break. He went to break a short time later.
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Howard said they have guests coming in later who he never thought he'd see together. He said he suggests that you stay tuned.
Howard said he was going to talk about something here. He said there's a Mike Francesa fart saga. He said he doesn't know much about Mike other than he's successful in sports radio and he's thinking of leaving the station again. He said it's just very odd. He said he finds his business plan kind of strange. He said Mike announced he was leaving the show and the day before that he was discussing the Jets when he may have farted. He said he boosted the audio so you can hear it more clearly. He played the clip and here is a sound that sounded a lot like a fart. Robin said that's a fart. Howard said he knows farts and that was a fart.
Howard said the saga is that someone posted the audio on social media and the Daily News wrote an article about it. He said someone called into Mike's show and asked him about the article. Mike didn't know what the guy was talking about.
Howard said that guy sounds so angry. He said he'd love for Mad Dog to come in there and tell him what it was really like to work with that guy. He said that would be great radio.
Robin said she thought that Mike left Mad Dog and that's what broke them up. Howard said he thinks it was the other way around. Gary said they used to fight all the time and then Mad Dog just left. Howard said he wants to get Mad Dog in there to tell the truth. Gary said he'll never do that. Howard said he has to tell him he has to tell the truth or he can't come in there again.
Howard said someone on Francesa's crew gave him the article and then Mike read it and denied that he farted. Howard said he has to think the guy actually did fart. Howard played the clip of Mike reading the article and denying that he did it. He said that they pre-tape that and if something had happened they wouldn't have allowed it out. Robin said he's saying that it's not live. Howard said that's part of the show that isn't live. Howard said maybe they just didn't hear it. Howard said he went on with this for 6 minutes. Howard played more of Mike going off on the Daily News about that. He said that it's fake news and it's just done for clicks. Mike said if there is something like that out there they made it. He said nothing like that ever happened. He wrote on his kid's lives that he didn't do it.
Howard played the fart again and said he thinks he did it. He said there is a pause in there where he was pushing it out. Howard said he does that when he farts. He said sometimes they can slip out but sometimes you do pause. Howard said this is what it should sound like. He did a farting thing with Fred where he farted after pausing a word. Robin said sometimes people think it's going to be silent and it comes out.
Howard said he has another possible fart on a Chris Matthews show. He played that and it did sound like a big fart. Howard said that should be the breaking news sound.
Howard took a call from a guy who guessed it was Eddie Van Halen and Sammy Hagar. Howard said that's a good guess. He said it could be Jon Bon Jovi and Richie Sambora. Howard said that's a good guess too. He said it would be more likely to see them than their next guests. The caller said he thinks it's rock and it's two people who don't get along. Howard said he could be right or he may be crazy. Howard said that will happen around 9 o'clock and they'll find out.
Howard said he's excited about this whole thing. He said he's not sure how they're going to do it yet. He said he's going to see what happens then. Howard went to break after that.
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Howard said Ozzy is in a new song with Post Malone. Howard said he's not sure who that is. He said he has just thrown in the towel on all of that. Howard said he likes Brandi Carlile and Maren Morris. He said he's into them.
Howard said everyone is guessing who is coming in today. He said he's going to take some calls and find out who they think it is. Howard took a call from a guy who said it's George Takei and Bill Shatner. Howard said that's a great guess. Robin said that would be great. Howard did his impression of George and Bill talking about working together.
Howard took a call from a guy who guessed that it was Francesa and Mad Dog. Howard said that's a great guess too. He said that was funny. Howard asked if he has another guess. The caller said Neil Young and David Crosby. Howard said that would be a miracle. Robin said she watched that documentary on David. Howard said Neil has had it with David. He said he insulted Darryl Hanna and Neil threw in the towel with him. Howard said David did say that it was the dumbest thing he could have said. He said he said it there on their show. Howard said he loves both of those guys. He said they'll find out in a couple of minutes who it is. He said it's actually Donald Trump and Rosie O'Donnell. He said maybe it's the Bloods and the Crips. He said they're going to setting their problems.
Howard took a call from a guy who guessed Simon and Garfunkel. Howard said that's a good one too. He took another call from a woman who said Joey and Mary Jo Buttafuoco. Howard said that could be it too. He said he never thought he'd see this day so it could be anything like that.
Howard said he might as well tell you. He said it's Dracula and Van Helsing. He did a Dracula impression and talked about the two of them. He said maybe it's the pope and Marilyn Manson. He said maybe it's Coke and Pepsi and they're going to merge. He said everyone knows it's the same drink. Robin said it's really not. Howard said it's going to be Larry King and all 8 of his wives at the same time. He said it's going to blow your mind.
Howard played a clip of Bobo making all kinds of noise. Howard said it sounds like he's fucking his vacuum cleaner. Howard said this is so overacting. Bobo said he's totally wrong about that. Howard asked why he was on the phone. Bobo said he was in the office and Shuli called so he left him on the line. He said he didn't call Shuli to tell him. He said he wasn't over acting.
Howard said Shuli talked to Bobo later that day and he said he did something stupid after the treatment. He eventually admitted he left a message for everyone in case he died from this infection. Howard said this is his message. He played the clip and Bobo was saying goodbye to everyone. He was describing what was going on with the infection and how the doctor had to get the infection out. He said if it doesn't go away he may have to have it surgically removed. He said he thinks this maybe his last goodbye.
Howard said Robin didn't even act like this after having cancer. He said he's putting it on so much. Fred did his Bobo impression with the Bobo puppet talking about how bad the pain was.
Bobo said the infection was so bad that the pus started to dry inside. Robin said he would be in the hospital if it was that bad. Bobo said he has puss finger. Howard said soldiers dying at Normandy were complaining less. Bobo said they kept spraying a cold spray on his finer and they said it was going to be the worst pain he's ever had. He said he had a bad infection. Howard said he's glad he lived. Robin said it's not as bad as he says it was. She said he'd be in the hospital.
Howard said he's glad he lived. He said that he's so dramatic though. He said if he was in that much trouble he'd be in the hospital. He said he'd be on an IV for the infection. Bobo said he's on an opioid for his pain. Howard let him go and said he has to get to their gusts. He said he never thought he'd see them in the studio together again. He said someone guessed Sonny and Cher and they'd have to roll in his corpse to do that. He said that's a ridiculous guess.
Howard took a call from a guy who guessed it's Robert Plant and Jimmy Page. Howard said stay tuned and they'll find out.
Howard took a call from a guy who guessed Simon Cowell and Imus. Howard asked why he would do that. He said that makes no sense. Howard said it's actually Richard Simmons and his maid. They went to break after that.
Howard came back and said he's excited today. He said he never thought he'd see what he's seeing in front of him right now. He said he's been quiet about his all morning. He said people think he's going to have Sonny and Cher in there. He said this is kind of crazy to him. He said sitting together for the first time in who knows how many years are the two founding members Chris and Rich Robinson who started the Black Crowes many years ago. Howard asked what they are announcing. Chris said they are announcing that he Black Crowes are getting together and going on tour next year.
Howard said he loves the band and it's a miracle that two sons can write and perform music together. He said it's a billion to one shot. Rich said he thinks he's right. He said they share a similar experience with two different perspectives.
Howard said Chris is the guy who sings and Rich came up with great riffs. He asked what the odds are. He said Mick Jagger and Keith Richards came up with something but they weren't brothers. Howard said he thinks about the guys in Oasis who weren't able to get along.
Howard said he had Chris on two years ago. Chris said he said some horrible things. He said he has apologized to Rich about that. Howard said he came in there and said he didn't exist in his life anymore. He said now they're sitting together in his studio. Chris said he had a lot of things change for him in the last 2 years. He said he was dealing with a lot. He said he didn't know why he was saying bad things about his brother. He said he wasn't sure why he was saying things about John Mayer. Howard said he was there with his wife last time. Chris said it's show biz. He said things weren't happening. He said he has a new girlfriend and things are incredible. He said he's leaving behind some negative things. He said he's looking at depression and all of those things.
Howard asked if he's in therapy. Chris said he is and he's going through all of that. Howard asked if he had an epiphany about it all. Chris said he wouldn't say that. He said he did think about his brother and what he was putting him through. He said it's all about change. He said their trajectory is different. He said he needed to go into the wilderness and work things out. He said he had to go through the good, bad and indifferent. He said his brother is doing the same thing. He said he has his own band too.
Howard asked Rich if he missed his brother. He said he believes that their songs are amazing and his guitar playing is amazing. He asked if he missed his brother or was he fed up with the fighting. Rich said he was fed up with the fighting. He said it was unhealthy for a lot of reasons. Rich said he had put together another band and he was working on that. Howard asked if it upset him that his brother was doing Black Crowes songs. Rich said he was doing the same thing. He said it was the constant ragging that got to him.
Howard said he thanks god he has a sister and no brother. He said he wanted attention from his parents and he didn't think he could share it with a brother. He said he gets it psychologically. Chris said something happened when they were kids and they got this great opportunity and did their thing. He said millions of people connected to it. He said then you're on this treadmill and he doesn't know how he got to the point he did with Rich. He said life still comes at you and there's still loss and joy in it all. He said they were just in a place to make money and keep it going. He said he and Rich never had that. He said they're complete opposites. He said he's always off the ground a little bit. He said they just didn't have any wherewithal to stop.
Howard asked if anyone suggested couples therapy. He said it is a relationship. He said they weren't given the tools to have a brotherly love. Chris said they didn't know how to deal with success either. Howard said it would have been a good idea to go into couple's therapy. Chris said that was part of the shtick. He said people played up to that too. He said they made rock and roll music so it was about push and pull kind of stuff.
Howard said what he liked about the Black Crowes was when they pissed on other bands. He said it was an attitude. Chris said it was like that for a lot of bands. He said they called it Georgia Guff. Howard said you don't want to be a sell out. He said you know your identity and you don't take any shit. Chris said it was defiance. He said today it's only compliance. He said they only promote things. He said when you get people in private you find out what they like or don't like. He said they were talking about how millions of people still want that kind of thing.
Howard said he thinks back about what he said about people when he was starting out. He said he used to goof in Led Zeppelin and he loves that band. Chris said you have to destroy the thing you loved so much. He said when they started REM was the kind of band they would have looked up to because they were from Atlanta. He said they loved The Replacements and they would talk about them.
Howard asked Rich if he got upset when his brother would go out and trash these other artists. Rich said it never drove him insane but the people around them were driven kind of wacky. He said you get out there and see the bands you love and there's a hurt there.
Howard asked if they're friends with ZZ Top. Chris said he loves Billy Gibbons. He said they did a Rolling Stone interview in 1990 and he was shocked that these legends were playing with him. He said that he called out Robert Plant on using a backing tape on their songs in concert. He said that made him rethink how they did their show. He said that Joe Perry called him 2 years ago and asked him to write a song for him and he had trashed them too. Howard said he gets what he's saying when they're playing a tape when you go to see a live show.
Howard said the guys are going to go on tour and do the first album in order. Chris said they didn't even do that when they started out. Howard asked what album they think is their best one. Rich said Shake Your Money Maker was their first and most successful. Howard asked if they will be on stage together and playing. Chris said they'll get along. Howard said he thought they would be wheeled out in cages or something.
Howard asked how this came about. Chris said there's magic in the music they make and doing it on stage. He said they love rock and roll more than ever right now. Howard said they want to perform. Howard asked how this all came about. He said they hadn't spoken in 6 years. Howard asked whose idea it was. Rich said they have a friend who is in between them. He said his name is Greg. He said they called Greg. He said it was right around the same time. Rich said they were going out and performing Crowes songs and he has a lot of the guys from the band in his band. He said there was something missing there. He said it was a glaring omission which was his brother. He said for 6 or 7 years they were going through all of this.
Howard asked if he was at Chris' wedding. Rich said no. Howard said he didn't even know Chris' kid. Howard asked if they saw each other when their father died. Chris said they were in the same room together.
Howard asked if Chris is conflicted about his dad. He said he was a musician and his father would tell him he couldn't sing for shit. Chris said they were talking about that the other day. He said they were hanging out with Jimmy Page and he wanted to tell his dad about it and send him a picture.
Rich said when Prince was on American Bandstand their dad thought that was terrible. Rich said he was a very old school kind of musician. He said what they were into wasn't what their dad was into.
Howard said their dad didn't get them. Howard asked if he was physically abusive. Chris said not at all. Rich said he was just critical. Howard asked what song he had that was a hit. Chris said it's on the 50s channel sometimes. He said you can catch it.
Chris said they both think that Shake Your Money Maker is their best stuff. He said that's why they're doing it on tour.
Howard asked about this guy Greg who brought them back together. Howard said they should have brought him in. Howard said Greg thought it was the right time for them to talk. Rich said he told Greg he thought it was the right time and he told him that he had just heard the same thing from Chris.
Howard said he thinks about the guys in Oasis and how they don't get along. Rich said they went on tour with them and they freaked those guys out with how bad they got along.
Howard said they had a rule about fighting where they say they can't hit each other in the face. Chris said that is a rule they had. Howard asked who won most of their fights. Chris said no one won if you really think about it. Howard asked if anyone ended up in the hospital. Chris said not at all.
Howard asked how bad their fights were. Rich said they got into a big one at one point when Chris showed up late to rehearsal. He said they were screaming at each other. Howard said it's hard in families to get along. Chris said if he had to do it all over again he wouldn't change a thing.
Howard asked if they had a pain in their stomach's when they had to work together. Chris said they didn't have anyone from management around them to keep them separated. He said that they didn't have anyone around to tell them what to do. He said it was the two of them writing songs.
Howard asked when they started writing together. Chris said they started as teenagers. Howard asked how it started. Rich said they weren't that good back then. He said he learned 3 chords from his dad and that's all he taught him. Howard asked how they did it. Rich said they were in a room together. Chris said they wrote ''She Talks to Angels'' at home in their parents house.
Howard asked if the problems are exacerbated by drugs. Chris said booze, coke and heroin are far more worse. Howard said Rich never got into that. Rich said it would have freaked him out to do that stuff.
Howard said Chris was into the drug culture. Chris said by the end of the 90s most of it was escapism. He said he loved drugs. He said he can look back at his time as a daily coke user and wonder what the fuck that was. He said when your heroes are Keith Richards and Jerry Garcia then what do you expect.
Howard said he watched a documentary on Tom Petty and you don't realize how much drugs can fuck you up. Howard asked if he ever went to rehab. Chris said he just stopped using. He said that was the end of it. He said 72 hours later he was rolling around sweating in his loft. He said it wasn't so bad.
Howard asked if he had to get clean. Chris said he thinks about the legalization of weed and how he used to talk about that. He said he can't smoke it now and perform these songs. He said he's almost 53 now and he can't do it.
Howard asked if they have heard from any of the original members of the band. Chris said they are the original members. Howard asked if they had to do it all over again would they have hired musicians to work in the band. Rich said one former member said the scariest thing was when he and Chris got along because no one could stop them. Howard said they could control them in a way if they were separate. He said that's pretty devious.
Howard asked if it was weird to go meet Rich's kids after all that time. Chris said not at all. He said it was normal. He said Rich has a bunch of kids and he hadn't met them. Rich said his 9 year old was curious. He said he'd ask to meet him. Chris said his daughter will be 10 and she didn't know her grandmother. He said he had to make some changes in his life. He said he was mad and upset. Howard asked what the anger was. Chris said he thinks it was disappointment in her. He said it may have been in his mind and he was feeling things about her that made him cut her off.
Howard asked Chris about how he and Rich they got back together. Chris said they worked through a third party. He said he figured this could be the most punk thing they could do. Rich said they thought it could be cool to do this.
Chris said they didn't want anyone from their past dealing with them. He said they wanted to start fresh. Rich said they wanted to do it with new guys so it was something new for everyone.
Howard said at some point it has to get out of a theoretical thing and they have to see each other. Howard asked where they were. Chris said they were in New York. Chris said that they met in New York and they had their kids with them. Chris said that his girlfriend came too. Howard asked if that annoyed Rich. Rich said whatever makes him happy. Chris said it was a piece of the puzzle that she didn't know about. He said the first time they played ''Jealous Again'' was something they did too.
Howard said they're going to take a break and they're going to perform a song. Howard said they're going to be out on tour doing their whole album from beginning to end. Chris said the tickets are on sale right now. Howard said they're announcing that they're back together right here in the studio. Howard said this is a miracle. Howard said he said if they start fighting he's not jumping between them. Howard said go to TheBlackCrowes.com right now for tickets.
Howard had the guys perform their song ''Jealous Again.'' After the song Howard said they still have it. He said that was a lot of fun to watch. He said go out and see them on tour.
Howard said he likes to look over his notes while people perform but he had to watch this performance. Howard asked how they wrote that song together. Rich said he came up with the intro first. He said he wanted to write a song like Tumbling Dice. Chris said Keith Richards band performed that song and said it reminded him of something. He said of course it did because it was just like their song.
Chris said he met Mick Jagger at a show they did right before they got fired from ZZ Top. He said Mick made a comment about how he was seeing himself from 1974 there. He said he was probably insulting him but he took it as a compliment.
Howard asked Chris about hanging with Keith Richards and what that was like. Chris told Howard about what that was like. Howard ask if it was happening so fast they weren't able to take it all in. Rich said it was like that. He said they were able to hang out at Keith's amps while they were performing. Howard said that had to be the best school to go to. Rich said he and Chris had gotten into a big fight so he got hi sown bus. He said he didn't want to be in the same bus with him. He said he meditated for like 3 weeks after that. He said it was just to calm down. He said he let a bunch of shit go and he got to Europe and he let all of that shit go. He said they started getting along after that. He said then they got to tour with the Rolling Stones. He said on their days off they were playing with Jimmy and Robert.
Chris said they did a show where they were with Bob Dylan and the Rolling Stones. He said that was the best. He said Bob was his biggest hero. He said they were behind the amps watching and they were going to have Bob sit in. He said Mick had a long satin shirt and he remembers that but not his own social security number. He said Bob went out there wearing the same thing as Mick. He said they were playing a Bob Dylan song and then they come up to Bob's turn and Bob goes up to the microphone and doesn't sing anything. He said they went around again and Bob just turns away from the microphone. He said this goes on for half a verse. He said Bob finally goes to the microphone and starts singing something. He said they don't finish and they walk off stage and Mick and Keith came back stage. He said Bob gave them a big fuck you as he walked off stage. He said it was the best thing they had ever seen.
Howard asked how it felt to do their song in there. Chris said it was good. Rich said they actually broke up in the middle of it and didn't tell anyone.
Howard said he's thrilled for them and he's happy for them too. He said they should do another song for them. He said they're going to do ''She Talks to Angels'' next. Howard asked about writing that song together. Howard said when this album came out it was during the time that hair bands and Guns 'N Roses were big. He said that there weren't any other bands doing this kind of music. He said they weren't worshiping Metallica. Chris said he did have Kill 'em All. Howard said bands didn't understand what they were doing. Howard said the name of the band was Mr. Crowes Garden. He said the record company didn't want them called that and getting confused with Soundgarden. Chris said it just didn't fit with what they were doing. Howard said he loves their logo. Chris said that Mr. Crowe's Garden was a book and they had to keep the E in Crow to make it work.
Howard asked if it was difficult to put this song together. Chris said it was all difficult putting their first album together. Rich said it was tough because they didn't have ProTools back then. Howard said the band had to hit it just right. Chris said it was take after take. Howard asked if they knew it would be a hit. Chris said not at all. He said they were always just trying to write songs to do their best with. He said they wanted to have a connection with someone.
Howard asked if Rich had this intro first like he did with the other song. Rich said he had the whole song and he came up with the opening later.
Howard had the guys perform ''She Talks to Angels.'' After the song Howard said that was fantastic. He said he's not sure what to say. He said that was exciting. He asked if it still feels good playing that song. Chris said it is. He said you have to get up and give it everything you've got on stage. He said to have this gift to be able to play music for a career is great. He said he still has people inspiring him. Howard said brothers who write songs together is so great. He said that song didn't exist and they sat down and wrote it. Howard asked if it shocks Rich when his brother comes up with that stuff. Rich said it does blow his mind after the fact. He said he always loved what he does and did. He said it was always great for him to write the songs and give them to Chris because he knew he'd write amazing things.
Howard said it is amazing. Chris said he didn't know about the stuff in that song. He said he didn't know about it until later in life. He said it wasn't a dark song but he was singing about things he didn't know about. He said he added some things in there that were making up a story. He said sometimes those things just fall into your lap out of nowhere.
Howard said there was a lot of pressure on them to do this stuff. He said their second album was great too. Rich said they didn't let the pressure bog them down.
Howard said this is a miracle story to him. He said it's amazing that they're back together. Chris said he was adamant about them never getting back together. He said he was wrong about that and about John Mayer being in the Grateful Dead. Howard said he was a big Grateful Dead fan though so he gets why he'd be skeptical. He said he thinks that he liked that they became this cult jam band. He said Chris didn't like that John Mayer was in the band. Chris said he was trying to be funny but you look back on it and wonder who cares?
Howard said Chris is fine with it now. Chris said of course. He said no one cares what he thought back then. Howard said he is an entertaining mother fucker to watch. He said the way he moves and dances is compelling. Rich agreed. Chris said he cut off his LSD Jesus hair and he wants to move. He said he thinks he dances quite a bit in the shows. Howard asked if he ever thinks about how filthy the stage is when he's in his bare feet. Chris said he doesn't worry about it that much. Howard said he gets into it in a way. He said that he could just stand there like the guys in Oasis or move around. He asked when he made that decision. Rich said it was born in Chris. He said he was always a dancer. Chris said if he wasn't so tall he could do the splits.
Howard asked how he stays so thin. Chris said he wants to lose about 15 pounds. He said he's at the heaviest he's ever been. He asked if Howard can help. Howard said he can't help. Chris said he'd like to be thinner for the tour.
Howard gave them a plug for the tour and said they're going to do ''Hard to Handle'' next. He said that's the only cover they did on the album. Chris said he loved Otis Redding. He said that it's inspiring because they're all from Georgia. He said that they weren't doing it as a cover really. He said they made it more rock and roll. Chris said to this day this is the gift Otis gave them. Howard said they have sold millions of albums and Otis' family must be thrilled. Chris said that makes him happy too.
Howard said the guys are back together now and he never thought it would happen. Howard said he knows the Greg they were talking about. He said he's Cuz to him. He said the guys are going to do another song now. He said on tour they'll be doing their whole album. Howard said this band is very powerful too. He said it's nice to see them out there. Howard gave them more plugs for the tour.
Howard said they're going back in time and this is what you'll hear when you go to see them on tour. Howard had the guys perform ''Hard to Handle.'' After the song Howard asked why they're laughing. They said Rich made a little mistake. Howard asked Rich about the guitar he had and Rich said it was flooded in Hurricane Sandy. He said he lost 70 guitars. He said he got some restored. Howard said those are like your children. Rich said he lost more in the divorce. He said he's happy he has that but everything has a connection.
Howard said he was thinking about that album and how they were nominated for Best New Artist Grammy. He said that they didn't win. Chris said thank god they didn't win. He said that's the curse.
Howard asked if they're in the rock and roll hall of fame. The guys said they're not. Chris said that Thin Lizzy isn't in it so they're not going to get in. Howard asked why they're not in there. Chris said there are a lot of bands that aren't in there. Chris said that there are a lot of groups they love that aren't in there. He said just to be a part of the whole thing is more important than getting an award.
Howard asked if they don't want their legacy to be that they fought over stuff. He said he thinks money can ruin things like that. Chris said he just wanted to make it like it was before. He said they're not fighting now.
Rich said they started the band as their band and they're doing that again. Howard said they sound fantastic.
Howard said hello to the band and introduced Tim, Raj, Isaiah and Joel. Howard asked how they met them. Chris said they all just knew each other. He said two of the guys had their own band so they've ruined their band now.
Howard said it was a different time back in the 90s. Rich said things just sunk back in the 90s. He said things shifted back then and it ruined the business.
Howard asked the guys if they remember when they heard their first song on the air. The guys said it was Jealous Again. Chris said the most memorable thing was when ZZ Top fired them.
Howard asked Rich if he was afraid he was going to lose his brother when he was going out with a Hollywood star. Rich said he didn't think like that. He said he knew Chris would be fine. Chris said he got to do some cool things. He said he got to smoke weed with Robert Altman at a party. He said that was something.
Howard said he loves the Black Crowes with Jimmy Page. He said they did all of those songs and they were awesome. He said he thinks Chris did the songs like he wanted to. Chris said he was trying to do them that way but keep them like Led Zeppelin.
Howard asked if they got nervous performing with those guys. Chris and Rich said they weren't. rich said they were so cool to deal with.
Howard said it's so weird that Robert Plant won't go out and perform with the band anymore. Chris said that they loved all of those bands growing up. He said they also grew upon Muddy Waters and Stacks and all of these great blues artists. He said they were younger but they had the same records that launched all of those bands. Howard played some of the stuff Chris and Rich did with Jimmy Page. The guys talked about what that was like working with Jimmy.
The guys were talking about working with Krist Novoselic from Nirvana and Howard thought they were talking about Chris Cornell. Chris said he just lost a band member to suicide a couple of months ago so that brought that band to an end. They spent a minute talking about depression. Howard thanked the guys for coming in and doing what they did.
Howard had the guys bring in their friend Greg who brought them back together. Howard said he has to see him. He said he sees this guy almost every day and he didn't say a word about it. Howard wrapped up again and went to break.
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Howard said he had a weird dream like 2 nights ago. He said Chris asked him to play bass in the band in this dream. He said he told him to just sit there. He said he thought that was weird. Robin asked what that means. Howard said he has no idea. He said he never thought they were going to get back together. He said last time Chris was there he said he didn't want to be in the same room together with his brother. Howard said he thinks they're still working on things because they weren't looking at each other. He said he didn't want to say anything while they were in there but you should go see them tonight. He said he's not sure how long they'll be together.
Howard said he was doing a commercial for Gardein and he was watching a documentary about Game Changers. He said Beth was asleep and he was watching that because he can't watch things she might want to watch. He said she's not going to watch that documentary. He said Robin knows about these athletes that all train with all plant based diets. He said they get all of their protein from plants. He said they go into how the meat industry is killing the environment and taking all of our water. He said you have to get off of meat. He said you have to try the plant based meat. Robin said she did see that documentary. She said Arnold is in it and he talks about how they were taught that you had to eat meat to get big. Howard said you have to see this documentary. He said it's called The Game Changers.
Howard he has to try something different for lunch. He said he's not going to have eggs today. He said he might try a bean burrito. He asked how Robin feels about that. Robin said it could be a good thing.
Robin started off with a story about Keanu Reeves who is dating someone close to his own age. Howard said it's fucking up everything in Hollywood. Robin said they should talk about what is an appropriate age. Howard said the guy is a good looking guy. Robin said she knows that but what is an appropriate age gap. Howard said he doesn't know about that. Robin said they have to talk about the average guy. Robin asked if it's 5 or 6 years. Howard said if you're 20 and dating a 15 year old that's wrong. He said if you're 30 and dating a 25 year old that's fine. Robin said people are saying this is appropriate but Keanu is 10 years older than this woman. Howard said she's not dying her hair so she must have a grey bush too. Robin said no one dyes their bush. Robin said they think that Keanu should be dating a 25 year old. HE's dating a 46 year old and it's making huge news. Howard said it's making a hero to women. Howard said with Keanu is a special guy. He said Leonardo DiCaprio could live to 150 and he wouldn't date a 46 year old. Robin said that they're making such a big deal that they're saying he should be embarrassed to be dating this woman. Robin said they have known each other very long and they're just making it public now. Howard said some people are saying she must have a magical vagina. He said every vagina he's ever come across has been magical. Robin said she thinks he's an incredible person.
Howard took a call from a woman who said she wanted to tell him that she listens to the show all the time. She said he's amazing and she wanted to give him a hug so bad. Howard said everyone loves him. He said he'll be sure to hug her when he meets her. Howard asked how old she is. She said she's 16. Howard said he can't hug her. The caller said she's kind of worried about Ronnie. She asked what's up with him. Howard said he has to go. He said he thinks her father is feeding her lines. He did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about T.I. who is in the news because of something he said in an interview. Robin had a clip of T.I. talking about how he goes to the gynecologist with his daughter to make sure her hymen is still intact. Howard played the clip and asked who he's talking about. Robin said it's his daughter and he has had her checked since she was 15. Robin said this is the kind of thing that's done in Muslim countries where they stone people to death for having sex before marriage. Robin said here he is doing the same thing to his own daughter. Robin said his daughter is now 18. Howard said they have a friend who used to have his daughter's boobs dusted for fingerprints. Robin said everyone was talking about the horror of having your dad have this done. Robin said he doesn't do anything to his son. It's only about the girl. Robin said this is wrong and it shows you have a lack of confidence in your daughter. Robin said how about raising her the right way and letting her handle things in her own way. Howard did another live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about Pat Sajak having to undergo emergency surgery for a blocked intestine. Robin said he's expected to be fine but they had to cancel a taping on Thursday. Howard said they could have grabbed someone out of the audience to host the show. He said call up Regis. Robin said they have had Vanna White step in. Howard said there you go. Robin had some of the Wheel of Fortune theme for Howard to play. Howard said it would be great if she had to run the show and spin the letters. He said she could run back and forth. He said the letters spin themselves so there's no need for her to do that anymore. Howard said she could host. Howard asked who would have guessed that Drew Carey was the healthiest host out there. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about the Mormon families that were ambushed in Mexico and killed. Robin said they lost 6 children and 3 mothers. Robin said she wondered what they were doing in Mexico. She said they started this community down there 47 years ago. She said they moved there to start their own sect down in Mexico. Robin said they wanted to have multiple wives down there. Robin said they say that most people there don't practice polygamy. Robin said now the families are trying to get them home from Mexico. Howard said the cartels were just shooting at the wrong cars down there. He said they saw a nice car and shot it up. Robin said it's so dangerous down there that the may not be able to get back home.
Robin read a story about the impeachment process continuing. Robin said Trump is in the city and he'll be kicking off the parade there in New York for Veteran's day. Robin said he's still got the impeachment process going on. Robin said they're calling in more witnesses. Robin said on the other side they're calling for the whistle blower to testify and come forward. Robin said the second thing is that they're calling for Hunter Biden to be called in. Robin said from what she can see is that he hasn't done anything. Robin said they're trying to murk up the playing field. Robin had some audio of Lindsay Graham saying that they have to know who the whistle blower is or the impeachment is dead in the senate. Howard said he can't stand Lindsay Graham. He said he's from South Carolina or something. He said he doesn't like the whole concept of the senate. He said he's with Bill Maher on that.
Howard said how about his friend Greg bringing the Black Crowes back together. He said he had no idea he did that. Howard said he sees that guy every day and he didn't mention a thing about it. He said he knew they were in business with them but he had no idea that was going on. He said he's proud of Greg.
Robin read a story about Michael Bloomberg possibly running for President. Robin said he is not happy with the democratic field so far. Robin said they asked Trump about that and she had some audio of his response. Trump said little Michael will fail. He said he knows him fairly well but he will not do well but if he does well he'll be happy. Howard said he wishes Bloomberg luck. He said he'd vote for him or Biden. He said this guy knows how to run government. He said he has proven it. Robin said she would agree with that.
Robin read a story about how people are asking to stop with the ''quid pro quo.'' Howard said a lot of anchor people have trouble saying it too. Robin had some audio of some people discussing the use of that term. Howard said he's so sick of the whole thing. Howard said he thinks the whistle blower is actually Melania. He said that's why they can't reveal who it is.
Robin read a story about cold weather coming in this week. She said that breath taking cold is going to sweep across the country. Robin said they could break records in 148 cities from Tuesday through Thursday. Robin said they're going to have some cold temperatures there in the city. Howard said he and Fred will have to bundle up when they go on their walks together.
Robin read a story about how Mercury will be passing between the Earth and the Sun today. Robin said it's the last time that will happen before 2032. Howard said he and Fred will have to check that out on their walk. Robin read a story about NASA warning people not to look at this without proper eye protection.
Robin read a story about a child pornography sting that led to 17 people being arrested in Pennsylvania. Robin said 2 of the men were using Facebook to get young girls to send nude photos to them.
Robin read a story about Mick Jagger putting out the complete catalog of solo albums he's done. Robin said it's going to be released on vinyl. Robin said they'll be out on December 6th. Robin wrapped up her news and Howard ended the show around 11:20am.
Howard started the show talking about watching this show on HBO called Mrs. Fletcher. He said maybe Robin is watching it. Robin said she tried watching one. Howard said he loves it. Robin said they just talk. Howard said they jerk off too. Howard said it's about a woman who is trying to find her sexuality. He said he likes it. He said he was reading in the paper about how they only get 420,000 viewers and that's not lighting the world on fire. He said he wants it to continue because he likes it so much. Howard said he loves the characters on the show. He loves the son and the mother. He said the son is a dick.
Howard said he likes Euphoria too. He said that's a good show. He said they have Zendaya on that show. He said that they have a Tranny on the show. He said he's not sure if that's acceptable. Gary said it's not. He said that's like the N-word. Howard said he will say Trans then. He said he used to call them Trannies when he was hanging out with a bunch of trans people. He said they were fine with it.
Howard said he didn't know the actress was trans. He said she's very good. He said she's the compelling one in the show. He said she's really good. Robin said she can't watch that one either because she can't stand watching drug addicts. Howard said it is depressing. He said he likes anything trans. Robin said he doesn't watch Pose. Howard said he loves trans stuff. He said they've perfected it. He said you can't tell the difference.
Robin asked if he would date a trans person. Howard said he thinks he might get a hand job. He said he still can't get over that hump that it was a guy at one point. He said it's too hard for him. Howard said not one of them ever came on to him though. He said he got nothing. Howard said the trans actress on Euphoria is Hunter Schafer. He said he and Beth look up every picture of her online.
Howard said he hasn't met a trans person who even wants to touch him. He said no sex seems to be attracted to him. He said hetero women and homosexual men are turned off by him. He said women who do flirt with him only do it because he's famous. He said he has a feminine quality to him and he may have been meant to be a woman.
Howard took a call from a guy who said the tranny thing is troubling to him. He said it's a politically correct thing. He said a man who transitions into a woman is not a woman. He said if they find them dead in a grave 100 years from now they're not a woman. Howard said he has to let go of the anger. He said he has a philosophy on this. He said you get one life. He said you're born and you get one life. He said if some guy feels like he wants to be a woman then let him be a woman. He said if he wants to get rid of his cock and grow some tits it doesn't harm you. He said he's fascinated by it. He said he knows people have spent their lifetime picking on people like this and it's bullying.
The caller said it's a ruse. Howard said it is a male body but who cares? Robin said society is a ruse too. She said the A-list thing is a ruse too. Howard said she's right. Howard said people say that Christmas is something that they won't let you celebrate. He said religion and Christmas are also a ruse. He said everything is a ruse.
Howard said he saw David Spade at an event and he was very funny. He said Robert Downey Jr. was there end thanked Stan Lee for all of his work on the Marvel characters. He said he was great. He said those guys who were working on the comic books got fucked over. He said it's like the blues guys who got ripped off by the record companies.
Howard said there are so many injustices in the world. He said he was reading about the guy who started Uber. He said the Uber thing is great but he feels bad for the guys who bought medallions in New York City who are just about bankrupt.
Howard said they asked the Uber guy about going into Saudi Arabia. He said he said something stupid about the journalist Khashoggi who was killed and he said something about them ''making a mistake'' with that. He said it was a stupid comment. He said the guy wasn't killed by mistake. He said the guy was lured to this place and he was killed. He said the Uber guy just said something stupid. He said it's really weird to him that a guy who killed someone is getting away with it. He said this Prince is getting away with murder. He said he's surprised that Trump isn't getting any blowback.
Howard said trump is also getting away with this thing he was just fined $2 million for. He said he ran a scam and no one is talking about it. Howard said that's worse than what he did that's getting the impeachment thing going. Robin said there's a lot of stuff. Howard said it all doesn't compute for him. He said it really doesn't compute.
Howard said he sees that the governor from Massachusetts is contemplating getting into the run for President. Robin said they're getting in another group and she's not sure what's going on. Howard said he's a fan of Bloomberg so they'll have to see what happens.
Robin said he's waiting for the Super Tuesday to come around and that doesn't usually work. Howard said it didn't work out for Giuliani either. He said at the time he was a big Rudy fan and he wondered why he was doing that. He said he didn't understand it. He said you have to go all in.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked how they get ratings for a show like Mrs. Fletcher. Howard said they have a meter and a diary that people are supposed to fill out. Howard said if they put the meter on the TV can be on and you're not watching. Howard said he thinks they ask you to do both. He said that's what it was in the old days. He said it was the same thing with radio. He said they'd have you write a diary for what you listened to.
Howard said it became ineffective when people weren't writing down what they were listening to. He said they came up with a meter for radio too. He said they asked you to do both.
The caller asked if they have a specific number of people doing it. Howard said it is a small sample of people. The caller said he just wanted to thank him for taking his call. He said he might lose them at any moment. Robin said they have people wearing something when they listen to radio. She said they'll wear it in a mall and it picks up anything you're listening to.
Howard took a call from a woman who said she's transitioning into a woman. She said he wanted to thank Howard for talking about it. Robin asked how old she is. She said she's 25. Howard said now she sounds fine. He said when she first started talking she sounded like she was putting on a voice. Howard said he wants her to come in and show them her vagina. He said it has to be better now than it used to be. He said he's sure they've perfected it. The caller said he's not sure why they can't just make your asshole larger. Howard said he's seen a trans vagina and it was too high up. He said he's calling on the medical community to drop that vag like an inch or so. Robin said they need someone to explain how they do the operation. She said they don't take the penis off. Howard said they take the head of your dick and turn it into a clitoris. Robin said they use the tissue of something to make the vagina.
Howard said Andrea doesn't sound like she knows much about it. She said she has to find out from the doctor what they do. Robin said her voice is dropping down. Andrea said she has to run off to her boyfriend. Howard asked if she has tits yet. She said she does an they're a G. Fred played an old show clip where Taboo the transsexual did a bit on a show they did.
Howard took a call from Chris Wilding who was doing his Andrea impression and said he called in to coach Andrea on her voice. He sang ''Old Man River'' with a deep voice and then did his woman voice. Howard thanked him for the lesson. Chris sang like Ben Stern so Fred played a clip of Ben singing too.
Howard said his old man really got into it. Robin said talk about full commitment. Howard did his impression of his dad singing.
Howard took a call from Mike from Maine who said he was surprised that he had Rich and Chris Robinson on the show yesterday. He said they sounded better than ever. Howard said he never thought they'd get back together. He said they had genuine hate. Robin said they hadn't seen Rich in a long time. Howard said Chris was on the show 2 yeas ago talking about never wanting to see his brother again. He said he thinks they sounded great yesterday. He said he got a lot of feedback about them. He said he told people to get tickets because they don't know when they might break up again. He said the music sounded great yesterday. He said the engineers there are doing a great job. He said they love the mix in there when they perform. He said it's very hard to put a band that size in there and get that kind of mix. He said the engineers do such a great job there. Howard said he loved it. He said Chris' voice sounded great. He said he's 53 and still sounds good. Howard played some of their ''She Talks to Angels'' that they performed yesterday.
Howard said it's really worth going to their show. He asked Fred to come over there with his new vagina.
Howard read some feedback they got about the show yesterday. People were writing in about how great The Black Crowes were on the show. Fred played them performing ''Hard to Handle'' too. Howard said they had tons of people just digging them.
Howard said it was very good. He said you can go on their web site for the full schedule. He said there's nothing like watching a rock band performing and singing. He said he's so fond of Chris on the air. He said he never seems too guarded. He said he may have been a little bit with his brother in there though.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he wanted to compliment them on the live mixing for the bands in there. He said it's better than any TV show or anything. He asked if a band is performing in there does he take his headphones off or listen through them. Howard said with most of the performances it's so loud in there that he keeps them on. He said he wasn't able to hear Chris at all. He said he was just hearing the band. He said now he knows why these guys lose their hearing. He said he listens to the mix in the playback. He said it's so much fun to watch them play. He said he's very fortunate that he gets to sit there and watch. He said the fact that they're going out on this tour is great because they're doing small venues. He said that makes it more intimate.
Howard said Chris Robinson is one of the best front men he has ever seen. He said the guy is fascinating. He said he was honored that they made the announcement on this show. He said it was an exciting morning. The caller thanked Howard for that and everything.
Robin said Howard brought up how your partner is your brother and they were lucky enough to have that. Howard said he had that with Billie Eilish and her brother too. He said the brother was fine with her calling the shots and being the star. Howard said he's not sure how she gets along and Rich and Chris didn't get along. He said he doesn't know. Robin said it's the same with the Gallagher brothers from Oasis.
Howard said he loves musicians and hearing how they put songs together. He said there are so few who make it and break through. He said you'd think that when you hit a home run you want to get along in any way possible. Robin said you'd be in love with that person. Howard said even if your brother is a jack off you have to get in a room and write songs together. He said you can go off and marry Kate Hudson and do whatever you need to do to have that stardom. He said these guys go berserk. He said he can't wrap his brain around them not being able to sit in a room with each other. Robin said the fights are really out there too.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he started using Metamucil cookies. He asked if Howard is taking one or two at a time. Howard said he wants to thank this company. He said they're not a sponsor or anything. He said he loves the apple crisp cookies.
Howard said he went to the doctor and he was told he needs more fiber in his diet. He said he was told his doodies were too hard. He said they were weird doodies. He said they weren't the same as from his youth. The caller kept mumbling under him so Howard threatened to hang up on him. The guy said he was just excited. Howard said he has to stop.
Howard said he was told by Dr. Agus that he should get more fiber. He said he is getting older but he still has dark hair. He said his bush is still dark too. He said that's not grey. Howard asked if Fred has grey bush. Fred said that's the one place that it's not grey. He said he has grey hair on top but not down there. He said he doesn't understand it. Robin asked if Fred every colored his hair. Fred said he hasn't but he thought about it. He said people talked him out of it. Howard said he looks fine with it.
Howard said he was told to get the Metamucil. He said the packs have 2 cookies in them. He said he was told to just eat the two. He said he has yogurt and berries and breaks those up into pieces and puts them in the yogurt. He said it tastes like apple pie. He said it's plain yogurt. Howard said you don't need anything else. He said you don't need flavorful yogurt. He said his doodies are so fluffy and big. He said Metamucil has done it again. He said he says that out loud when he goes to the bathroom. Fred was playing Howard's farts over this conversation.
Howard said he wants to show Robin his doodies. He said he doesn't take anything into the bathroom with him. He said he just wants to go to the bathroom. The caller started talking again so Howard said he has to hang up on him. He said he's making him nervous.
Robin said he should have music for when he turns to look at his doody. Howard said he doesn't like what she's saying. He said he's making the Mona Lisa of doodies and she's joking about it. Howard said he recommends the Metamucil stuff. He said it really works.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked about what an open E is because the Black Crowes mentioned that. Howard said it's an open chord on the guitar when you strum it. He said it makes it easier to strum. He said Leslie West uses open D a lot. He said it makes it easier. Fred said it's voicings that you don't get with a regular tuning. He said Keith Richards uses it a lot too. Howard said you see guitar players doing it during the shows because they have different tunings.
Howard said he was watching a video on the internet yesterday. He said Taylor Hawkins from the Foo Fighters was showing how he learned the drums. He said he listened to records and played along with it. He said it's a master class on being a drummer. He said it was a great video. He said it's fascinating to see their process like that.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he thought all of his appearances on TV were fantastic. He said he thinks Howard looks good. He said the one thing he has is a saggy neck. He asked if there's anything he can do with that. Howard said he's not going to get plastic surgery. He said things are happening and he's aging out. He said he knows he doesn't look good. The caller said he looks good. Howard said he doesn't look good. He said he knows it. Howard said the party they've been having for 40 years is going to come to an end at some point. He said he's aging out and he knows it. He said Beth tells him he looks fine but he sees what's happening. Robin said you don't have to step of stage because of your saggy neck. Howard said at some point he does.
Howard said he has had people give him strange looks his whole life. He said what he's attempting to do is beat the odds. He said he tries to work out and stay in the game. He said it's something that Taylor Hawkins was saying. He said he's in his 40s and he really has to go to bed early and be disciplined. He said doing 3 hours on stage you have to be in shape. Howard said for anyone who does a radio show you have to be in shape. He said that's why he's staying in shape. Robin said she talked herself out of a voice last week. She said it really does get harder.
The caller asked why he's always wearing black on the show. Howard said that's his look. Robin said he has some grey on today. Howard said the caller isn't wrong. He said he's no beauty. He said that's why you see him less and less on TV. He said he tries to hide from the cameras. He said he looks for where the light isn't. He said he knows where his light is and he hides from it. Howard said he knows what the caller is talking about and that's what's going on with him.
Robin said President Carter is back in the hospital. She said he's talking slower and falling a lot lately. Howard said this time might be it for him. He said he is 95. Howard said he has to keep trying to save his father from falling all the time. He said he keeps thinking he's going to go down but he doesn't. He said his dad is 96. He said his mother is 92 and she always says she's ready to go. He said she's been saying that since she was 30. He said she used to talk about how she wanted to go and kill herself. He said she'd do that if she had a cold. Howard said she'd never do it but she'd say she wanted to. He said his mother was depressed. He said her sister died young. He said she died of hepatitis. He said that fucked him up. He said his mother was all fucked up from that. He said he started doing drugs because of stuff like that. He said it was a little bit of relief. Robin said her safe place was school. Howard said he hated school.
Howard said he has Jimmy Carter on the phone. He said he's felling good. Howard picked up and the guys were playing clips of Joe Frazier mumbling and talking slow and playing the part of Jimmy Carter. They even had clips of him singing. Howard said he has no idea what's going on there. He said he didn't know he could sing. Howard said he has to take a break. He said Jimmy will be opening for the Black Crowes. Robin said President Carter still works on Habitat for Humanity. She said he still works on those houses.
Howard said he went to Maine to find a job. He said he went out to Altoona, Pennsylvania. He said in Pittsfield, Massachusetts they didn't even want him. He said he wanted a part time job overnight and they didn't want him. He said he went everywhere trying to find a job. He said he was bad on radio. He said he was shy and just not good.
Howard said he kept going even though no one wanted to hire him. He said he knew he was bad but he wanted to work. He said there wasn't one Program Director who wanted to look at him seriously. He said he was just so bad.
Howard said he was at his wits end and desperate. Robin said she got a job in Carlisle, Pennsylvania. She said she cried when she got that job. She thought she'd never be heard anywhere in the country other than there. Howard said he went there and was thrown out. He said he remembers driving and driving all over. He said out in Pennsylvania they were looking for a guy to do one shift a week and monitor the levels for the TV station. He said he thought he could get that job in State College, Pennsylvania. He said they had a shack with a transmitter. He said he gave them his tapes and they told him to leave.
Howard said he had to try one more time. He said he was at his wits end and he took his tape up and drove it to this rock station he heard about. He said he knew he could only be on a rock station. He said he went there and it was a progressive rock station. He said to him that meant that it was unprofessional. He said he went in there and this guy was sitting there at WRNW. He said his name was Donald J. Barnett. Howard said he introduced himself and Donald took his tape. He said he called him the next day and told him that he would be honest that it wasn't a very good tape but he had a nice hair cut and he's so sick of the hippies who don't show up for work. He said he hired him because he thought he'd show up for work. He said that was Donald J. Barnett. He said he was awful on the air the first time. He said Don didn't fire him.
Howard said he got a letter yesterday about how Donald J. Barnett had passed away. His son sent this letter to them. Howard said he was just 1 week shy of his 80th birthday. Howard said the son says his father was very fond of Howard Stern. He said he'd listen to the show on his way into the city and even at work. He said they gave him a satellite radio so he could listen. Howard read more of the nice letter he got about Donald. The son wrote about what his dad did after WRNW and how he was happiest in radio. Donald had a close call with dying a couple of years ago. He had a wife who passed away a few years ago. Donald lived in an assisted living facility and he listened to Howard and the Elvis station at the facility.
Howard said the letter goes on and on. He said he owes this guy his radio career. He said he hired him and gave him his first paying radio gig. Howard said he was a nice guy. He said he got to get his masters in radio that way. He said his father told him that's what it was like.
Howard said the first show he did on WRNW was a disaster. He said he was working on New Years day. He said he was told not to call and wake him up no matter what. He said he jammed up the equipment and he wasn't able to turn on the microphones. He said he had to call Donald. He said he thought he was going to get fired but the guy was very patient with him. He said he was a good guy. He said rest in peace Donald. Robin said he ran his race and it was a good one. Howard said he didn't know he was listening all those years. Robin said if he was listening up until the end she's wondering what they were doing. Howard said he thinks it was when he was talking about blowing Fred.
Howard said he was down about that. Robin said she understands why. She said it's sad. Howard said they will hear from JDini today. He said for those who love the app they have a new visual effect. He said they will have JDini predict the future. They went to break after that.
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Howard said he doesn't mind hearing Will Smith but what list are they looking at when they pull songs. Robin said it's the one where he's trying to pick up guys. Howard said he hasn't gotten Jiggy Wit It yet. He said maybe that was Ronnie's list.
Howard said now they're going to have some fun with JDini. He said they haven't had him on for months. Robin said it might be more like 2 years. Howard said it was so bad last time. He said now it's time for the Great JDini. He did an intro where he talked about JDini and his characteristics. JDini was even laughing as Howard was rereading his lines.
Howard said JDini is a floating head and so is his puppet. Robin said even though he's just a floating head he still takes up the whole screen.
Howard said they're going to get a glimpse into the future of our world. He said it's 2019 but JDini is going to let them see into the future. Howard said he sees floating spoons behind him. Robin said he has a new turban too. Fred did the JD Puppet thing and did his JDini impression. Howard told him to be quiet so he can get to this.
Howard said he can't wait to hear his first prediction. JDini said me too. Howard said JDini sees way into the future. He said he's his mush mouthed Merlin. He said it's time. He said forget the Long Island Medium. He said they have JDini. JDini said yes, yes. Howard said he's the medium that wears and extra large.
JDini asked if he's ready for his first prediction. Howard said yes. JDini predicted that Ronnie's fiancee will break into tears when they wed and she sees that Ronnie made it all the way through the ceremony.
Howard asked for the next prediction. JDini said that Howard Stern's penis will shrivel up and fall off from watching too much Bachelor. Howard said they might have to stop now. He said he's not sure if it's the jokes being bad or his delivery. Robin said it's his delivery. Howard said try to read it clearly.
Howard asked what JDini's next prediction is. JDini said that he predicts that LGBTQIAP will start calling themselves the drama club to save time. Howard said that was a good joke but his timing was off. He asked if it's hard to maintain that voice. JDini said it is kind of hard.
Howard asked JDini for another one. JDini said he predicts that instead of finding coal naughty kids will find Jets season tickets. Howard said that was alright. He said what JD was saying is that they'll find Jets tickets instead of coal in their stockings.
Howard asked JDini for another one. JDini said he predicts an earthquake that will strike Mexico so powerful that it splits open and candy falls out.
Howard asked for another prediction. JDini said he predicts that Caitlyn Jenner will undergo another operation and becomes a clock radio.
Howard asked JDini for another prediction and JDini said he predicts that during his first year of his second term Donald Trump will build his 2000 mile wall and kill Obamacare... with a Sharpie.
JDini predicted that Lenny Dykstra will transition into a woman just so he can eat his own vagina. Howard said alright. He asked for another prediction. Robin said she's enjoying this failure. Howard said it'll be another 2 years before they hear from him. Robin said it's like a train wreck. Howard said they wrote all of these jokes and thought they were funny. Robin said he's their new joke tester. She said if you can laugh at something he says then you have something incredible.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he's bombing so badly. Howard said he's kind of enjoying it. Robin said she is too.
Howard asked JDini for another prediction. JDini said he predicts that Oprah will introduce a new line of food. He said it was all of these things with cauliflower. Robin said he looks like he's about to pass out. JDini said he's just waiting to get through this bullshit. Howard said he's in a green screen leotard so you just see his head floating. He said fuck the effect and just show him in the green outfit. JDini said laugh it up. Robin said that's what they're trying to do.
JDini predicted that eventually no one will be offended by black face once everyone finds out that everyone has already been in black face.
Howard asked JDini for another prediction. JDini said he predicts that Syria will create a new reality series called Last Kurd Standing. Howard had him do another one. JDini said that he predicts that Louis C.K. will return with his own show called comedians in Cars Jerking Off into plants. Robin said they should stop now. Howard said he wants to keep going.
Howard said he only has 2 more predictions. He asked JDini for another one. JDini predicted that JD and JD Puppet will switch places without telling anyone and Fred will stick his hand up his ass. Oh ouchie!
Howard asked JDini for his final prediction. JDini said he predicts that SiriusXM will keep expanding until it becomes SiriusXM Pandora Heinz Massengil... and on and on with other corporations.
Howard asked JDini to never show his face again for 2 years. JDini said no problem. Howard said the JD puppet should hide too. Fred did his JDini impression and made some predictions about JD. His turban fell off while he was doing that.
Howard asked how they thank him for his predictions. He said he has done it again. JDini thanked Howard. JDini puppet said he predicts that he will not change his sheets for 19 years after getting married.
Howard said they should get some reactions to this. He took a call from a woman who wanted to ask JDini a question. She asked if JDini sees JD going on a tropical vacation this winter with additional marijuana smoking. Howard asked if he has smoked recently. JD said he did smoke some at home. He said it was just one time though. JDini said he took a gummy the other night when he went out to an event. Howard said look at you. JD said he didn't really feel anything. He said it was only 5mg. Robin asked what he did when he was home. JD said he didn't feel much that time either. He said a friend brought it in from California. He said it was someone his wife knows. Howard said he knew it wasn't his friend since he doesn't have any. JD said he's probably right.
Howard said look at JD. He said he went from zero weed to doing it regularly. JD said if anything it just makes him feel sleepy.
Howard took a call from a guy who said the best part of the skit were Howard's segues into the jokes. Howard said that's not what they wanted. Howard asked JDini to go figure out how to be funnier.
Howard asked what he weighs now. JD said he's 200 pounds. Howard said he predicts he'll be 220 in 2 years. JDini said no way.
Howard did more of his segues that he was doing during the bit. He would insult JD in many ways with those. Howard said he's just as good as any other psychic.
Howard took a call from a guy who said this was radio gold. He said his transitions into JDini were great. Howard did more of those where he insulted JD with jokes about his weight and that giant green screen leotard.
Howard asked if it's hot in that green suit. JD said not too bad. Howard said this is their first foray into this green screen thing and it's killing JD.
Howard took a call from a guy who said his 9/11 show was funnier than JDini. Howard laughed and insulted JD with more of those comments.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked if JD has tried having sex while stoned. JD said not yet. Howard asked if he predicts it will happen. JD said it may at one point. Robin asked if his wife gets high with him. JD said a little bit.
Howard took a call from a guy who said JDini is the four-chin-teller. Howard said that's a good one. Howard did more of his insults. Howard asked if Robin has had enough. Robin said she could look at JD all day.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked if JDini can tell him if you should go across the wrists or up the arms to not hear him anymore. Howard said he apologizes for that insult. He did more of his own insults after that. Robin said she thinks this is enough. She said she's afraid he's being damaged. Howard went to break after that.
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Howard came back and said this is not his playlist. He said he's not sure where they're getting these songs from. He said he knows that's The Killers. Gary said they checked with the guy who has his playlist. He said he suggested that Howard is too embarrassed to admit that he had the Will Smith song. Howard said he doesn't know that Killers song. He said he told Fred this isn't his playlist. Robin asked if they have had it before. Howard said yes.
Howard said he hasn't played a phony phone call in a while. He said the idea was to get some porn on a show. He said they love to play porn clips on the internet radio shows. He said it just pleases them. Howard said the guys called up an internet radio show that is like Halloween and monster themed. He said they talk about monsters and Halloween stuff. He said there's a lot of shows out there that no one is listening to. He said they get through immediately. He said they know it's them and they still take their calls because they're so desperate.
Howard said this is an homage to Blue Iris who used to come on the show. Howard played the call where Richard called into this show and told the hosts about this character they have called the Clit Keeper. He played some clips for them where they had the Clit Keeping introducing some Blue Iris porn clips. The hosts let the clip play but they said they wanted no part of this. One guy said that's not a horror movie that he's heard of. He said he knows just what that is. They hung up on them and said their show doesn't exist for this stuff. They said that clown won't be coming back. They took another call from them and the guys played more Blue Iris clips. They hung up again and said that was just fucking disgusting. They said the assholes are coming on.
Howard said they are the assholes. He said that was Blue Iris in that phony phone call. Robin said they said ignore them but they took the call anyway. Howard said you know no one is listening but they have to pick up because they have a phone call.
Howard said he did college radio and they would get calls once in a blue moon. He said no one was listening to it. He said once in awhile they'd get a call and they'd be shocked that someone was calling. He asked what the point of doing a show is if no one is listening. Robin said they're entertaining themselves.
Mike said he reached out to get the list again to make sure. Howard said he's going to check it again. He said maybe he was on hallucinogenic. Fred asked if Howard ever saw the Killers live at a Sirius event. Howard said no. Fred said he had a theory and that just killed it. Howard said he doesn't know the Killers.
Robin said there have been a few songs lately that she was questioning him about having on his playlist. Howard said he knows that Will Smith song isn't on it.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he loves the show and he's been listening for along time. Howard asked why he's calling. The caller said he's the sole reason he purchased a Toto toilet. He said he still has some doody going on even with that. He asked how Howard uses it.
Howard said he doesn't pulsate. He said he shoots the water in his ass. He said when he got the toilet he wasn't able to figure it out. He said he still had doody in there too. He said he had to use baby wipes to get it all out. He said then he realized he had to relax his sphincter. He said he would shoot it right into the hole and at the right angle and it would clean it. He said it shot in there in a way that it was almost drinking the water. He said he would release the water and all of the excrement came out. He said he was completely clean. He said he's at the point where he can do multiple cleanings. He said he can suck the water in and spit it out. He said it cleans it all out. He said he's completely clean after using it. Robin asked if he uses a wad of toilet paper. Howard said he just needs enough to dab off the water. He said he's just drying it.
The caller asked if he uses the highest setting. Howard said use the highest you can use to take the water into your ass. He said the body is telling you it's wrong. He said it's not though. He said he spreads open all the way and lets the water flow in. He said his asshole is open to everything. He said he's sure something could go wrong. He said you have to know what you're doing.
Howard said just let the water in and then excrete it. He said do it at your own risk. He said don't blame him if something goes wrong. He said if your colon bursts don't blame him.
Howard let that guy go and played an ''Unsolved Mysteries'' parody where they talked about anus belching with the Toto toilet. Howard said that sounds like a sick guy but that's him.
Howard said when people hear what he does they might want to try it and they do it wrong. He said he's not sure if they're capable of doing what he does. He said he no longer uses baby wipes. He said he doesn't have to mess up the environment and his cesspool. He said he's not going to use wipes and put them in the garbage. Robin said you can use gloves for that.
Howard said he's not saying this is for everyone. He said he has found a way to clean his ass that's revolutionary.
Howard took a call from Mariann from Brooklyn who said that Ellen is using his clip a lot and they have him kissing a man. She said they didn't tell him about it. Howard said he thought it was funny what Ellen did. He said they are using clips of him and they have the right to do that. He said he thought it was funny. He said it was a good joke. He said he does worry about people misusing things he has but that was funny.
Mariann said that Hilaria Baldwin had another miscarriage and she's on social media telling them to leave her alone. She asked what Howard thinks about that. Robin said she didn't know she had another one. Howard said he's sorry to hear about that. He let Mariann go after that. He said he's not sure what to say. Robin said there must be something you want to hold on to just for your family. Howard said it's a great place for showing off your pets.
Robin said someone was saying just imagine what it would be like back in the 70s if people took photos of their dinner and sent them to you. Howard said Benjy seems to post every dinner he has. Robin said it's the same thing as sending a photo of your meal.
Howard said he's not sure what Mariann was even talking about. Robin said she was saying what she just said. She said there are things you shouldn't be sharing on social media.
Howard said he's sorry to hear about Hilaria. He said he likes when she posts pictures of herself doing yoga. He said that's what he likes to look at.
Howard took a call from a woman who said she has a Toto toilet and she knows just what Howard is talking about. Howard said you're just spraying water in your ass if you don't open up. He said you have to get the doody out. Robin said you're not getting everything out. Howard said there's always just a little bit stuck in the chamber and that gets it out.
Howard said this is on a DC FOX station when they went to interview fans about the Nationals win. Robin said they are at a bar and they're drinking so she's not sure what they expect to happen there. Howard said they're always shocked when something happens in a situation like that. He said they do have a delay for that so he's not sure why they don't use it.
Howard played a clip of a fan of the Nationals yelling about how they needed this because they have some fucking asshole in the White House right now. They cut the guy off and sent it back to the studio.
Howard said in this clip a reporter said ''god damn it'' and they apologized immediately. Howard played that clip.
Howard said in another clip they interviewed someone in a snow storm. Howard played that one and the guy being interviewed talked about the snow day and how they don't have to work and then said he fucked that up. Howard asked if the guy thought he was auditioning or something. He said they act like people have never heard that word before.
Howard said this was during a golf tournament and someone said shit. Howard played that clip and the announcer said ''shit'' accidentally.
Howard said a reporter said ''sink piss'' instead of pitch. He played that one quickly.
Howard said another sports guy fucked up and said bulging dick instead of disk. The guy backtracked and got it right.
Howard said he had a bulging dick in his back when he was at WNBC. He went to break after that.
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Howard came back and took a call from a guy who said he gave him two cry spasms. He said he read that letter from Donald J. Barnett's son and that got to him. He said his father passed away and it got him. He said it was awesome hearing that. Howard said he really was sad to hear that he died. He said he owes that guy a lot.
Howard took a call from Apples who asked if Robin is feeling better. Robin said she is. Apples said this is how we need her. Howard said don't get sick Robin. Robin said she hates being sick.
Apples asked if he saw that Disney is lobbying for Robert Downey Jr. to get an Oscar nod. Howard said he's not sure if it's due to him but he did ask him about it when he was in there. He said just because something is based on comic books doesn't mean it's not a great performance. He said he thinks it is an Oscar worthy performance that Robert Downey Jr. did. Robin said there is a bias out there for all of that.
Howard said if Disney is pushing for it he's glad. He said they should. Apples said he thinks it's all due to Howard's interview. He said seeing him talk to Robert about that was great. Howard said Robert Downey Jr. is a great actor. He said he's an icon in movies. He said from an early age he was good. He said he's a legendary actor. He said when he's in there talking to him he has a great way of communicating. He said he's very bright. He said you realize that when you talk to him. He said it all came across in the interviews. He said he has his shit together. He said Disney should push for him to get an Oscar.
Howard said Joaquin Phoenix will get an Oscar nomination. He said Todd Phillips deserves one for directing that movie too. Apples said he saw that Robert Downey Jr. hangs out at his house. He asked what they do there. Howard said their wives are very fond of one another. He said the wives have to hit it off. Apples laughed sand said he's getting a divorce himself. Howard said Robert lives near him and their wives like each other. Howard said Robert doesn't stay too long. He said he's a good guest. He said he eats up and leaves. He said last time he saw him he stayed until about 11. He said they were having a great conversation. Howard said they all talk easily with each other. He said there's a flow and it's easy. He said he respects him intellectually. He said he finds him very smart and engaging. He said he doesn't see him a lot but from time to time they do see each other. He said that happened after one of the interviews he did with him. He said he thinks he ran into him at a restaurant and they hit it off after getting together.
Robin said Howard does that but he hasn't gotten out to diner with Conan, his best interview. Howard said he doesn't live near him. Robin said he could have done it out in L.A. Howard said he didn't have 3 minutes to do that out there.
Robin said she respects The View because they don't always need a guest. She said they have all of those women talking over one another and they can get through it. Howard said they probably do need a guest then.
Howard said he got booed at the World Series and the WFC wrestling event. He asked what's going on there. Trump said they were yelling out ''Coo'' and not Boo. He said that he gets the best boos in history.
Howard asked Trump if he pressured Ukraine to investigate the Bidens. Trump talked about what a great call that was. He said he nailed it.
Howard asked Trump if he really thinks Obama committed treason. Trump said that everything they accuse him of they're guilty of.
Howard asked if he's pissed at Nancy Pelosi. Trump went off on her and said she should blow herself up with all of her cohorts. Howard said he has Nancy on the phone right now. He took that call and fake Nancy joked about Trump's comb over. Trump said he's texting Ukraine now to have them investigate why she's such a crusty sea hag. The two of them went at each other with some insults for a couple of minutes.
Howard let them insult each other and then hung up. Howard said you can see the country is divided over this. Robin said they said that Trump had a meltdown in front of Nancy and they never did reveal what he said to her.
Howard said he likes that one on Euphoria. He said her name is Hunter Shafer. He said she's his favorite actress and she's trans. He said she wears mini skirts. He said he can't believe she used to be a dude. He said he's so into it. He said it's the same with Mrs. Fletcher.
Robin said Howard keeps thinking about their past. Howard said he is hung up on that. Robin said they're caught in a body that got the wrong assignment. Howard said that's it. He said he loves shows where they don't tell you about the person being a trans until like 3 or 4 episodes in. He said that's what happened on Euphoria. He said then you see this woman laying next to Zendaya and this hot blonde had nice titties. He said Beth pointed out that she had a cock. He said he had to rewind and freeze frame. He said she was right. He said he thought it was her pubes. He said Beth was the one who saw the penis. He said he went online and found out she was in transition. Howard said he was even more intrigued after that. He said he suggests you watch it. Robin said she likes her trans people happy.
Howard said he was shocked his wife picked up on that. He said he thinks he could be duped easily. He said it's very cool.
Howard said he got an update on Sour Shoes. He said some people were asking for an update. He said Sour Shoes does his own thing and calls in when he feels like it. He said he's unpredictable that way. Robin said he went from being a daily caller to being very spotty. Howard said there for a while he was on the phone every day. He said he must be giving them a break.
Howard said Sour likes to mess with Mike Francesa. He said he was calling him the wrong name yesterday. Howard played a call Sour made to Mike Francesa in September. Sour ended up going into his Gary impression as he was in the middle of asking a real question. Mike hung right up on him. Howard said that Mike isn't up for any fun. He said he didn't authorize any fun on that radio show. Robin said sports is about having fun but he takes it very seriously.
Howard said the last time Sour called in was on June 5th. He said he does call in on the weekends though. He said he leaves weird messages. He said a lot of them are total nonsense. He said he'll perform his own Sour Shoes show on the voicemail. He said this is like a minute of what they get but it goes on much longer. He played one of the voicemails where Sour was doing his Gary the Conqueror impression along with his Richard Simmons ''Gary!?'' yell while playing sound effects and playing his keyboard. Robin was cracking up listening to it. Howard said this goes on for 7-10 minutes. He said you have to be a real fan to know what's going on in that clip. Robin said he's definitely Wack Pack. She asked why he never comes up as one of the greatest Wack Packers.
Howard said that is the sound of mental illness for sure. He said that's how Mel Blanc got his start.
Howard said Sour ends up singing ''Year of the Cat'' in this voicemail. He said you have to spend time with all of these messages. He played that one where he was singing. Howard said he's like the Joker without a mission. He said he has no Batman. Robin said he hasn't found his super hero. Howard let that play a little longer. Sour was doing his baby voice, his Scott Farrell voice and other strange noises. Howard said that takes a lot of energy to do all of that. He tried to do an impression and said that drained him. He said it takes tremendous life force to do that.
Howard said Sour left the staff some voice messages on Facebook. He said he's usually doing his Gary impression. He said it's so good it really sounds like Gary. He played one of the messages where Sour was doing his thing and talking like Gary. Howard said even when he hears this he gets aggravated with Gary. He said it's not even Gary saying it. He said it's so realistic that he gets angry with Gary. He wondered if he replaced Gary with Sour if anyone would know. Robin said everyone would know.
Howard played more of Sour doing his Gary impression. He was doing the ''noine'' thing and going on and on with a song and making strange noises. Howard and Robin were cracking up. Howard said it's like if you had a fuse box in your head and he blew one of the fuses in his head.
Robin said she's not sure what he does between these calls. Howard said Shuli drove somewhere with Sour and he was stuck in the car for like 4 hours. Shuli came in and said from the second he picked him up in a van with no seats in it he was doing it. He said they did a show in Baltimore and he worked with him there. He said his act was Sour on stage with a guitar and a wig on. He said he was on roller blades and what you're hearing in this audio is what he did on stage. He said he was going 100 miles per hour. He said he was just watching the guy and he was in awe. He said the guy did like 25 minutes.
Shuli said from the minute he picked him up in the van he was in his Gary voice. He said he spent the whole trip in character. He said he was shocked that he was able to get this van. He said he did the character to the toll booth lady.
Howard said he wants to hear that clip. He asked if they guys have that clip. They pulled it up so he could play it. Sour was doing the impression as Gary talking to the toll booth lady. He was telling her his personal life was at a 2 and his professional life was at a ''noine.''
Howard played the voicemail that Jeff left for them about how he's tired of being made fun of and he'd like to have them take him seriously. Jeff said he's looking for a female who has an interest in utilizing him. He said he'd like to be a human toilet. He said he's sure there are hot chicks out there who have that good look about them who would like to throw up on a guy. He said he doesn't need to be thrown to the wayside.
Howard said how about this, there is no one out there who is into it. Howard asked if anyone thinks he'd be good as The Bachelor next year. Robin said they may not be able to get anyone to do the show.
Howard asked how many times a week he talks to Jeff. Shuli said he doesn't have a lot of time for him. He said he picks up once in a while.
Howard picked up on Jeff who was waiting on hold. He had some birds making noise behind him. Howard asked how many birds he has. Jeff rattled off the different birds he has and there were a lot. Howard asked what he uses them for. Jeff has some pigeons that he uses for racing. Howard said he should send out some of them to find women to throw up on him. Jeff said he took in some of the birds and they're very affectionate and loving. Howard said that's creepy. He said just imagine how that apartment smells. Shuli said he has a roommate too. He said the roommate knows about his lifestyle and wants nothing to do with him but she won't move out. Howard asked if he has asked her to vomit on him. Jeff said she has no interest in it. He said he's scum of the earth that she has no use for.
Howard asked if he's attracted to her at all. Jeff said he is minutely. He said he has fantasies about her occasionally. He said he has had them about Howard too. He said Howard said he would rather live in the Psycho house than with Jeff. Jeff said he's been in this apartment for 45 years and he's done a great job renovating it. Howard asked how this roommate avoids him. Jeff said she has her own room. He said she goes into the back bedroom and she locks her door and keeps to herself. Howard asked if she has a separate entrance. Jeff said not that but she rents the room and keeps herself in there. Howard asked how long it takes for her to lock the door. Jeff said she goes into the bathroom and kitchen too. He said Howard has built this thing up against him all these years.
Howard said he just wants to know what she's up to. Jeff said to each their own. Howard asked if he ever talks to her. Jeff said occasionally he does. Howard asked if he keeps talking about vomiting. Jeff said he doesn't do that. He said he's aware that it's not her cup of tea like it's his cup of tea.
Shuli asked if she has ever gotten sick around the house. Jeff said she has not in 5 years. Jeff said she works at the airport and keeps to herself. Robin asked how long they've been roommates. Jeff said he's been there 45 years. Howard said she's been there 6 years.
Howard asked if Jeff would be opposed to Shuli going to visit him. Jeff said not at all. Shuli said he knows he has a buddy in Jersey City who is into this too. Shuli said he wants to explain to Howard. He said they meet at a motel room in Jersey. He said they put on videos of women vomiting on each other and they jerk off to it. Howard said that's a very unusual thing. He said that's somewhat gay. Jeff said he thinks maybe bisexual. He said when they're watching the videos he's turned on by the hot chicks vomiting. Howard asked if they ever hold each other's penises. Jeff said no. Shuli asked if they ever use toys on each other. Jeff said no to that too. Jeff said they share a king sized bed though.
Howard took a call from Dave the Vomit Guy. He took that call from a Jeff impersonator who was talking about how much he likes being vomited on. He had birds in his apartment too. Howard said he just lost Jeff. He said he'll get him back.
Howard said Jeff was interviewed by local news twice. He said he doesn't think he ever played these before. Howard played one where Jeff was talking about people getting provoked by something in his neighborhood.
Howard asked if the guys are getting Jeff back. He was back a few seconds later. Howard said he thought he had him locked in. Jeff was all excited about something. Jeff said he also shoots water up his ass. Howard was trying to say something but Jeff was just talking about other things. Shuli tried to rein him in. He told him to shut up and listen.
Howard said he has to give him the harsh reality. He said he doesn't have any women who want to vomit on him. He said if they find anyone he'll have him in there. Jeff said he just wants to be in the presence of it. Shuli said he'll hang out by bars where women come out after drinking and waits to see them throwing up. He said he'll go home and jerk off to that. Jeff said he'll wander around the east village for hours looking for that. He said he waits for them to get sick in the street. He said it's very entertaining for him. Howard asked how often it happens. Jeff said in 3 hours he might see 2 women throwing up.
Howard asked if Jeff works. Jeff said he's been on disability since 1988. He said he worked at the post office back in the 1980s. Howard asked what's wrong with him. Jeff said he has the inability to get along with people. Howard asked who doesn't have that. Jeff said he was convincing enough to make people feel like he's sick in the head. Robin said he's not though, right? Jeff said he's a degenerate. Howard asked if he's really a sicko or is he duping the government. Jeff said he's not really a sicko, sicko. He said he's the friendly neighborhood degenerate. Howard said how about hang outside the hospital and wait for people to vomit outside there. Jeff said he's tried that but you can't watch anything.
Howard had Dave the Vomit Guy back on the phone. Howard let him do his thing where he had birds making all kinds of noise. Dave said he loves women's vomit on him too. He said he'll only call Shuli 3 times a day if they find someone for him. Jeff said this is just a joke like everything else. Howard said it's not a joke. Dave kept going with more and more bird sounds. Jeff said he has the oral stimulation too. He said he likes spit and all of that. Howard said this is gross.
Howard went back to Jeff and told him that if any women are listening and get in touch with him he'll see what he can do. He said he doesn't know women who want to vomit on him. Jeff said if they feel sick or nauseous then call. Robin said they can't get him in there that quickly.
Jeff said he's into spit and dominance and submission. Howard said most of those women want to be paid. Jeff said they're professionals. Howard said Richard threw up on him back at K-Rock. He said they can do that. Jeff said he can't get turned on by that.
Howard said he has Sarah on the phone and she says she's interested in Jeff. Sarah said she's not sure if Jeff could keep up with her. She asked him to talk dirty to her. Jeff said he can do that. He said he's a role player. Sarah said that's cool. She wanted him to get her going. Jeff started calling her names and cursing her out. She started to make vomit sounds. She said she can't control it now. She started shitting and vomiting. Jeff said he's not a woman hater. He said he might be brain damaged or something. Robin told him that she's throwing up and he's missing it. Jeff kept talking dirty to her and said he wanted her to stick her finger to her ''uvia.''
Howard said if they have anyone call in who wants to throw up on him he'll give him a call. He said don't keep calling in with the same question. Jeff said if Shuli wants to visit him he can. Howard said he's sure he will. Howard hung up on Jeff when he started to talk again.
Shuli said he just missed that whole vomiting thing. Howard asked what he has to do here. Fred told him he had to do a live read. Howard did his live commercial read and went to break after that.
Howard asked what's in the news. Robin read a story about T.I. and this testing that he was having done with his daughter. Robin said the daughter has unfriended him on social media. Robin said she really wasn't too happy about it apparently. Robin said the World Health Organization says virginity testing is a violation of a person's rights and there is no reason for it.
Robin read a story about the song ''Baby It's Cold Outside'' and how that song has caused some uproar the past year or so. Robin had Howard play the original song. Robin said John Legend and Kelly Clarkson did a version of the song. Robin said they decided to revamp the song. Robin had Howard play some of that version. John and Kelly sang it like they were fine if they didn't stay together. Howard said he has his favorite version which has Harvey Weinstein singing in it. They had their own version with Harvey Weinstein audio recordings in it. Howard said Harvey won the Creepy Grammy for that. Robin said the most disturbing thing she read was that Harvey was kanoodling with a young actress out there. Howard said if there's someone for that guy there must be someone for Jeff the Vomit guy. Robin said it sounds bizarre that someone would be with Harvey like that. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about an emotional moment on Jeopardy. Robin had Howard play a clip of a contestant revealing a message for Alex where he said ''We love you Alex.'' Alex got emotional and cracked as he was thanking the guy for that. Robin said that was shortly before he announced he had to start his Chemo all over again.
Robin read a story about a waiter who spilled red wine on a Hermes bag at a restaurant. Robin said the woman said she spent several months trying to get the stain out but it didn't work so the woman sued the country club and they turned around and sued the waiter. Howard said that sounds like a Judge Judy situation. Howard said it was an accident and no one was at fault. He asked what happened to common sense. He said a waiter can spill something. He said he didn't do it on purpose based on what he's hearing. He said don't buy a $30,000 purse. Robin said if you can't afford to have that replaced then don't take it to a restaurant where something might get spilled on it. Howard said how about getting insurance on it like we do with cars. Robin said if you take something outside something might happen to it. Howard said at some point you have to be ashamed to have something like that. He said it holds tampons and lipstick. He asked if he buys $6,000 shoes who is he going to sue if he gets them dirty?
Robin read a story about a man underwent a double lung transplant after his lungs were damaged by vaping. Robin said they say this is the first procedure like that done on someone due to vaping. Robin asked what's so great about vaping. Howard said Sal says it's illegal vaping stuff that causes it. Robin said Sal also believes he flies outside at night while sleeping.
Gary said they had a work event recently and he thought the building was on fire but it was just Sal vaping. He said it produces more smoke than a cigarette. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about it being that time of year for gifts for loved ones. Robin said a lot of people give out gift cards for spas. Howard said he already got Robin a gift. He said he did it a while ago. He said he's been sitting with it. Robin said she's still trying to think of what to get him. Howard said he got Fred a fruit cake. Robin said if you're looking for a spa gift for your wife you can get a breast facial. Howard said his wife isn't getting that. Howard said he never puts his foot down with his wife but his wife had a spa treatment and they only had a man available. He said he said there's no way that's happening. He said he put it off until the next day. He said he's sorry but he's not letting that happen. Howard said Beth says they're all gay but he has a friend who said he was knuckle deep in a woman's ass while giving her a massage.
Robin said they have this breast spa that promises to increase perkiness and give more supple skin. Robin said that someone comes in and massages your breasts. Howard said Benjy needs one of those. He said his breasts aren't perky. Robin said this woman wrote about getting one of these things and she was eventually relaxed. She was approached by a woman with electrically charged needles that go into your breasts. The woman said the needles were tingly. Howard said this is stupid. Robin said they spare the nipples. Howard said he had a friend who got massages with guys only. He said she let them rub her tits and she loved it. He said she told him that. He said it was an erotic massage that he gave permission for. Howard said she made it very obvious that she wanted it. Howard said he's going to send his mom to this place. He asked what it's called. Robin said it's Sia's Beauty. Howard did his impression of his mom talking about her sex life. He had his dad in there asking questions over and over again because he can't hear. Robin spent a little time talking to Ben and Ray. Howard had his dad asking ''Who?'' over and over when his mom would mention Robin or Howard. Howard did a live commercial read when he was done with the impressions.
Robin read a story about Neil Young who has a delay in his application for American Citizenship. Robin said he answered about his use of marijuana and he was called back for that. Robin said they have a policy about that thanks to Jeff Sessions. Robin said they say that a person who smokes marijuana may have poor moral judgment. Howard said he's worried about JD now that he's smoking weed. Howard said Neil Young wants to be able to vote in the 2020 election so that's why he's applied to be a citizen.
Robin read a story about the congresswoman who had to resign after nude photos of her were leaked. Robin said they say that they're going to have to ask people if they have ever taken nude photos of themselves before.
Gary Puppet came to life and asked if they heard that Neil Young had been denied citizenship. Howard said they just spent 10 minutes talking about that. Gary Puppet said he just woke up so he missed that.
Robin read a story about some ISIS prisoners being released in Turkey and they're being sent back to their countries. Robin said some of them were from the United States. Robin said she thinks that they should be stranded at sea. She said England has a policy about that and they won't let them back in.
Robin read a story about Disney+ which is being released today. Robin said they are expected to be a new player in that industry. Robin said they had some login problems today. She said you may have issues logging in. Robin said some people said they had problems accessing content or setting up a watch list. Howard said Bob Iger isn't going to be happy about that.
Robin said Apple has released a new credit card. She asked if Howard has that. Howard said he doesn't but he has the TV service. Robin said people are saying that the credit card is discriminating against women. She said Apple is saying they don't do that but women are getting less credit then men are.
Robin read a story about people working when they're sick and how that might be the wrong thing to do. Howard said he and Robin work sick. Robin had some audio of someone talking about how it's best for people to take off if they're sick so they don't spread the illness. Howard said he likes when Robin works when she's sick. He said he feels they should come to work when they're sick. He said there are some who don't need to be there when they're sick. He said Robin is essential.
Robin read a story about President Trump kicking off the Veteran's day parade yesterday. Robin had some audio of Trump's speech. Howard said he likes his sentiment but he has to do something to fix the Veteran's Administration. Robin said she saw tat some people put up signs that read ''Impeachment'' but someone spelled a sign wrong.
Robin read a story about the president's impeachment hearings and what's going on with that. Robin had some details on that.
Robin read a story about Nikki Haley who wrote a book and she claims that she had Rex Tillerson and John Kelly trying to get her to undermine the president. Robin had some audio of her talking about that.
Robin read a story about a new book coming out on November 19th by Anonymous. Robin said this person claims to be an insider and they were upset when they didn't lower the White House flag to half staff when John McCain died. They're now reporting on things that are going on behind closed doors there.
Robin read a story about Michael Bloomberg putting his toe in for the run for President. Robin said Bill De Blasio says that Bloomberg doesn't fit today's Democratic party. Robin had some audio of De Blasio for Howard to play.
Robin read a story about the president talking about how his transcripts are being doctored for the closed door hearings for his call. Robin said some of the lawyers are saying that's not the case. Robin wrapped up her news and Howard ended the show around 11:25am.
Howard started the show talking about how he sees they're starting in again with the Christmas thing on FOX News. He said they're upset about this ''war on Christmas'' thing. He said they're going after Starbucks for some reason. He said they seem to think Christmas is being taken away from them by Starbucks. He said he's not sure when that started with Starbucks. Robin said it comes from the religious right and FOX is taking up the cause. She said that's a lot of their viewers. Howard said if the cup had Jesus being crucified then they'd be okay. He said you can't judge the condition of Christmas based on a cup that Starbucks puts out.
Howard said the other thing is these gender reveal parties. He said people are convinced that you have to announce what sex your baby is going to be. He said you don't just call them up. He said you invite them to a party and reveal the sex. He said it's getting people killed. Robin said they're building bombs to set off. Howard said he read about a couple that released 350 gallons of water to reveal the sex of the child. He said the plane ended up crashing but didn't kill anyone. He said last month a woman died in an explosion. He said they caused a wild fire in Arizona with a gender reveal party a couple of years ago.
Howard said this has to be the dads getting involved. He said they don't do anything but reveal the gender. Howard asked who cares what you're having. He said the only people who should care are the parents. Robin said maybe the grandparents and some friends. Howard said life is just too boring for some people. He said they have to celebrate.
Howard said he was thinking about this and how Judd Apatow is against it. He said it's Netflix trying out a faster speed to watch their programming. He said he would like this. He said they have it at double speed and he thinks he'd like that. He said he could watch more stuff. He said even the shows on the CW he'd like to go through faster. He said he thinks he'd get back into it if he could watch it faster. He said he loves super hero movies and shows but the CW has all of these shows and he finds that he gets bored by them. He said they must be written by the same guy. Robin said they're the same story over and over again. Howard said he stopped watching Dancing with the Stars when Sailor Brinkley was kicked off. He said he might watch it if it was faster. Robin said he's not going to watch Sean Spicer for 2 seconds. Howard said that's true. He said he might be into this faster speed though. Robin said they were talking about just doing it for the movies.
Howard said he was talking about The Wire with JD and JD watched it in double speed. He said he got through it faster. Robin said these people who write and create these shows don't want you watching it on high speed. Howard said he's fine if people want to hear the show in high speed. He said he'd listen to it that way if he could. Robin asked if he wants to listen to JDini in high speed. Howard said sure as long as people are subscribing. Robin said she rejects. Howard said he doesn't. He said Judd has to relax. He said he's complaining about them ruining his art. Howard said do what you want.
Howard said there was a radio station that played Rush Limbaugh and they jammed more commercials in by making his show go faster. He said Rush was upset by that. Howard said he's fine with it if you want to speed him up. He said Jon Hein said it's sacrilegious to do that. He said he wishes he had that in real life so he could get through Gary's stories faster.
Howard said he watches most of his TV on his iPad. He said he watched the latest Avengers on there. He said he's still watching The Walking Dead too. He said he still likes it. Robin said she's not watching it this season. She said it used to be good to her and she couldn't wait for it to start up.
Howard said he's obsessed with Oprah and he might have to talk to his therapist about it. He asked if he should. Robin said she thinks he should because he thinks he can tell Oprah how to run her life.
Howard said Oprah went with Gayle King to see Tina Turner. He said they're walking around with Tina and doing their thing. He said Oprah is in such a good mood and they're talking to Tina and she doesn't even want to be there. Howard said Oprah is asking her how she feels about having her own show. He said he's not sure how Gayle works on a morning show and she's not there working on making the ratings better. He said she's out with Oprah instead. He said this all drives him nuts.
Robin said Howard isn't doing what he should be doing. She said he's busy watching Oprah. Howard said then she's in her garden picking vegetables. He said she's acting like she grew them. He said she has a gardener. He said he's getting worked up and he can't quit her. He said she has to block him.
Howard said he was watching Oprah with her dinner party. He said there were an equal number of white and black people there. He said she must know he's counting. He said he's obsessed with everything Opah. He said she wears tight dresses too. Robin said that's her business. Howard said it's his business.
Howard said he saw that Oprah and Gayle were in a room together where they were talking to this woman who makes the book recommendations. He said Oprah realized that Michelle Obama wrote a book she didn't know about and she could have promoted it for her. Howard said this drives him crazy. Robin asked what's going to happen if she stops broadcasting. Howard said he's going to lose it. He said he's a fan. Robin said he's her Mariann from Brooklyn. Howard said he is.
Howard said they're doing all of this on TV. He said that drove him nuts too. He said his wife told him he has to relax.
Howard said Oprah put something about Lady Gaga's makeup and then Lady Gaga was putting makeup on her. He said it was driving him crazy. He said Oprah had something she didn't have on her list and she realized she should have put it on the list.
Robin said she was thinking of getting everything on Oprah's list for Howard for Christmas. Howard said she has all of this expensive stuff on the list. He said it's middle class women who want to get that stuff and they can't afford it. Robin said she thought about getting that whole list for him. Howard said don't get him anything.
Howard said nothing satisfies him. He said the guys at Marvel got him something. He said they're going to have a Marvel channel there on SiriusXM. He said they drew him with Iron Man and Captain America and the Avengers. He said he has a cat with him in it. He said it was very sweet of them but what is he going to do with that? He said it was in black and white though. He said Gary showed it to him in color. Gary said someone showed it to him in color. Howard said the one he has is in black and white.
Howard said if he had Instagram he'd show it to people. He said he's not going to show it to people because people will never have something like that. He said he doesn't want to make people feel bad. Robin asked how he knows that he's making them feel bad. She said that's not the truth. Howard said he doesn't want to show his fantastic lifestyle. Robin said that's what the Kardashians do. She said look at how popular they are. Howard said he can't do that. Howard said the artist for the Marvel thing is Jorge Molina.
Howard said everything works him up. He said he said that to his psychiatrist. He said he was telling him to calm down. Robin said he's like a guy who picks at a scab. She said he needs one of those cones they put on dogs after surgery but for life. She said he's constantly following her and he has to stop it. Howard said once you accept Oprah your life gets better.
Robin said she doesn't think about Oprah all day long. She said he has to stop with the Instagram. Howard said he has to see what Beth is posting about him. He said Beth came running over to him with the camera and put him on Instagram. He said he doesn't need to share his life. He said Beth wants to get homes for cats so he lets her do that. He said suddenly he's on there too. Robin asked what the difference is between him and Oprah. Howard said she's doing it willingly. He said he asks her not to put stuff up but Beth doesn't care. He said she says he looks cute and it's okay. He said she says that and he thinks he never looked good.
Mark asked if he's afraid of phlegmy Gary this winter. Howard said he has to get out of New York. He said it's so cold there. He said he has to get his flu shot. He said he has to get a pneumonia shot too. He said he has to get that next week. Robin said she got that one. She said you don't get it every year. She said it might be a two shot thing and you're done. Howard said he's getting it next week.
Howard said he has to get to motor vehicle too. He said he has to go down there to do it because they're changing things around. Gary said he had to go twice. He said he had all of the documents but they said one wasn't good. He said it was good though.
Howard said he thought they were done with all of that but now they're back into it. Gary said it's a verified license that they're talking about. Howard said they have to have it for flying. Gary said it's going to be mandatory in 3 years. Robin said she just got one and she's not sure if it's enhanced.
Howard said he's getting his license and his shots next week. He said he's going to go check out this Hydro thing that's a rowing machine like Peloton. He said he's going to check that out. He said he loves doing Peloton and he wants to try this rowing thing.
Howard said he loves Beth because she doesn't even want to do Peloton. He said she doesn't want to fuck with his seat. He said he has it all set and she doesn't need to work out. He said she doesn't do anything. Robin said she used to run. Howard said she just cleans cat shit and takes care of cats all day. He said she's on her feet all day and she's ripped.
Mark asked if Howard is drinking enough water with that Metamucil. Howard said he's fine. He said he's drinking more water. He said he was up 3 times pishing during the night. He said he's not pissing like a race horse either. He said it just comes out in a little stream. He said he was trying to pee into his urinal. He said he uses his underwear to hold his penis so he doesn't touch it with his hands. He said he has tissue in there too so it absorbs the dribbles. Howard said he clips his underpants under his penis and then he has to get his penis back into his underpants on the tissue he has in there. He said he's like a ninja getting it back in there. He said if it hits just right it works. He said he had to handle the tissue last night. He said he had to wash his hands because he touched it. He said he had to wash his hands and he knew he'd be up all night. Mark said it's like torture. Howard said get off his phone. He said he's making him mental.
Howard said he lets out a sigh when he doesn't get his penis in there right. He said Beth asks what's going on and he tells her it's something else. Howard said he has to take a break. Gary Puppet interrupted and told Howard the phones are working. Howard thanked him for keeping up. He went to break after that.
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Howard said he has to get to this next thing. He said he can't listen to this all day. Robin asked for just a little more. Howard let the song play a little longer. Howard asked Fred how hard it is to play that riff. Fred said that's an intermediate kind of riff. Howard said that's too hard for him to play. He said he was watching Rich Robinson playing the other day and he was getting nervous for him because it seems so hard to play.
Howard said he has a new respect for drummers after watching Taylor Hawkins playing in this interview. He said it's not as easy as you think it is. Robin said they all have to do things in the band. Howard said he got nervous during this part of the song with the Black Crowes. He played a clip of ''She Talks to Angels.'' Howard said they put the video of this song out. He said he was tweeting it yesterday. He let the song play for a few seconds.
Howard said they have such a good catalog of music on that app. He said he was watching that clip of Sammy Hagar and Michael Anthony in there. He said they were talking about how they wrote a song and how Eddie Van Halen was outside his window yelling at him to come downstairs. He told the story about what went on with that song ''Finish What You Started.'' Fred played some of that performance in the studio. Howard said you have to watch these guys. He said Michael Anthony is so good with the harmonies. He said if he could do that he'd be carrying on about it. He said Michael just does it.
Howard said it's a song about blue balls. He said it's so great. He said he loves musicians and what they do. He said it's beautiful. He said he had a band but nothing happened. He said it was awful. He said he told Fred to write him a hit song and nothing happened.
Howard said Michael Anthony got kicked out of Van Halen and he's so good. He said someone said he was no good at playing bass. He said it drives him crazy when they bad mouth the guy. He said it's kind of like Trump. He said Eddie is like that. He said Trump puts someone in office and then he bad mouths him months later. Robin said at least Trump figures it out early. Robin said Eddie hung on to Michael for 30 years before he realized it.
Howard said just watch this video they have up on YouTube. He said it's a great performance and they just do it like it's not a big deal to them. Robin said musicians play like that instrument is another part of their body. Robin said it seems so easy.
Howard said he doesn't get it with Trump. He said he calls someone a great guy like Steve Bannon. He said then he's calling the guy ''sloppy Steve.'' He said you can't do that.
Howard took a call from Psych who was on the phone. He said he's suffering from stage 4 Leiomyosarcoma which is a rare form of cancer that affects muscle. Howard said the doctor says he has a 4 pound tumor. Psych said that it's around his liver and other things down in his pelvic area. He said he had a colonoscopy and he got a CAT Scan that showed this tumor. He said he was asked to get a liver biopsy and he got that and they showed that it started under the pelvis and it's wrapped around the liver and kidneys. He said there's no possibility of doing surgery on it. He said half the organs would be gone.
Howard said Psych has been getting Chemo and they gave him 6 months to live. Psych said in July they said 15 months to 5 years. He said he refused Chemo 3 times. He said then it went down to 6 months to 3 years. He said they told him that he's got 6 months now.
Psych said that he's trying a holistic thing before Chemo. He said there are tons of things you can try. He said there's so much that's going on out there. He said the more you read about it the more web sites you find that show people were cured. He said a lot are cured but in a low state type cancer.
Howard said what he's saying is don't self diagnose. Psych said if he had started Chemo in July he'd be about 10 times better than he is. He said from July to September he was in no pain with this. He said he had no pain from the tumor. He said he was still writing songs and doing regular things. He said his body was telling him he was fine. He said he just kept going and he got tricked into feeling that he was okay. Howard said Steve Jobs tried to cure himself holistically too. Robin said once you're in the late stages it's too late.
Psych said they never told him at the beginning what stage he was in. He said you know you can have tumors in lower stages. Robin said once it's wrapped around the organs you're screwed.
Howard said when you're this far along you can't mess around. Howard said for those who don't know Psych's work he'll play some of his songs. He said he's got millions of them but these are his greatest hits. Howard played a song from 2009 that Psych did. He played a medley of some of his other great parodies about Robin.
Howard said he has so many great songs. He said the first one he sent in went to Gary and Jason but they missed it so he sent it to Sal who got it on the air the next day. Howard said on top of his latest medical problems he's blind. He said he was blinded at the age of 2 after beating another cancer. Psych said he was born with the tumor and they cut it out when he was just 6 months old. He said he got it in the second eye at 2 years of age. Howard said this never slowed him down. He said he can type 140 words per minute even though he's blind. He said he was in bands and he got laid easily because of that. He said he doesn't use a cane and he doesn't ave a seeing eye dog. He said he gets around by himself.
Howard said Psych plays all of the instruments on these songs. Robin asked if he had lessons. Psych said he didn't. He said he had a friend of his mother's show him a guitar. He said he started banging on it like a drum and didn't know what to do with it. He said he showed him one chord and he taught himself after that.
Howard said Psych is a phemom. He said Psych has come in with Baba Booey songs too. He played some examples of that and some other special songs he's performed for the show. Howard said he sang live to Robin at the Birthday Bash. He played that clip where he sang live. Howard said he was a big hit there.
Howard said Psych has contributed so much to the show over the years. Psych said the birthday party was the best thing he ever did. He said he was being accused of not being blind that night. He said the one thing he has done that no one has done with a parody was when JD was doing the sheet washing thing and he created a song and sent it in the same day and Howard played it that day.
Howard said when he heard about this health thing he wanted to talk to him about how much he appreciates what he's done for the show. Psych said it's his 10th year doing it. Howard said he's brought so many great things to the show. He said he heard his legs are so swollen that he can't walk. Psych said he has kidney failure and he wasn't able to walk so he had to cancel coming on the show. He said he had surgery for his kidneys and that ruptured a blood vessel and he had to have a second surgery for that.
Howard said he hates to interrupt him but he's wondering if this is it. Psych said he's sorry to say that it's getting worse and not better. He said he's a bit somber that he's at the terminal end stage right now. He said he's past the stage 4 thing. Howard said he's not sure how much time he has left but he knows he wants his ashes spread at Red Rock. Psych said he would like that because that's where a lot of bands play.
Howard said he wants to tell Psych how much he means to the show and the fans. Psych said thanks so much. Howard said all of his songs have been really funny. He said his songs are very rapey. Robin said they're funny though. Psych said that maybe Robin can keep some of his ashes. Robin said she would do that. She said she has a few people's ashes and her horse too.
Howard said he appreciates him spending all of this time making things for his show. Psych said that the person who inspired him passed away from cancer. Howard said maybe Robin put a curse on him with her witch coven. Robin asked why Mikey is so healthy then. Howard asked if there is an afterlife. Psych said he doesn't think so. He said he's with Howard on just going where you go. Howard said he sounds so upbeat with this. He said he lost his eyesight and now cancer. He asked why he's so fucking positive. Psych said he thinks it has to do with how you grew up in life. He said he did normal things even though he was blind. He said if he had gone to blind schools and stuff he may have relied on more people. He said he gives his parents a lot of credit.
Howard asked how he walks around without a guide dog. Psych said he's been doing pretty well. He said he listens for footsteps and stuff. He said he takes cabs more now though. He said he used to ride bike when he was younger.
Howard asked if he has a will. Psych said he does not. He said his family and friends are great and they'll take care of that. Howard asked if his parents are around. Psych said his father died when he was on the show one day. He said he died of leukemia. He said he had a very short lived cancer. He said he was only in hospice for 2 months.
Howard asked if he is in pain right now. Psych said he is in really bad pain. He said he has taken 4 pain killers and it still doesn't work. He said he's on a cocktail of pain killers. He said the cancer may be spreading to his lungs and he could die from that. He said the pain is in his pelvis and abdomen and his legs. He said if he could get his legs taken care of he's be in less pain by about 50 percent.
Psych said he was told that this stuff that's going in his legs could go to other parts of his body and cause more pain.
Howard asked if he has any regrets. Psych said he regrets being so girl crazy. He said he was constantly on the hunt. He said he feels he would have been better off as a musician if he hadn't done that. He said when you're young and you start getting into the girl situation it can be a full time job. He said he thinks that he'd be a better musician if he hadn't done that. He said his girlfriend left him so he's available now.
Howard asked if he's going to make more song parodies. Psych said he will make many. He said he's not giving up.
Psych said he had one Chemo treatment and he lost all of his hair. He said he got mouth sores and kidney failure after that. He said the last parody he did was him laying down and doing it. He said he had a microphone he hoisted over his mouth and sang while laying down.
Howard said he doesn't know what to say. He said he doesn't know how to end this. Psych said he's not going to end it. He said he's staying positive and he's going to beat this like Robin beat her's. Howard said she beat it so he's going to do it too. Psych said he's in a great hospital in the city. He wanted to give his web site out. Howard said he's not going to say no to that. Psych said you can email him and listen to his 600 song parodies at PsychMusic.com. He said email him and just say hello.
Howard took some calls for Psych. He took one from a guy who said he loves the guy and wishes he could do something for him. Psych said just keep him in your thoughts.
Howard took a call from another guy who had a song written for him by Psych. He said he had a jingle in his head and he asked him to write it for him. He said Psych did it.
Howard took a call from a woman who said she's heartbroken. Psych said don't be. He said we're keeping this positive. The caller said she wanted to hook up with him and do a parody with him some day. She said she hopes that she can do that. Psych said it's so good to have this support. Howard said take care because we all love you. Robin said good bye and was barely able to get it out. She was crying. Robin said she can't take this. She said he has to stop doing this to her.
Howard said they had a fan who left their ashes to them and they lost them. He said they don't know what they did with them. Howard asked Gary who that was. He said they had them at K-Rock and they got lost in the move. Gary said it was Benjy who told the story. He said it was a brother's ashes and they lost them in the move.
Howard said Psych wrote a lot of songs about Robin. He said he's not sure how many there were. Robin said here were like 2-3 a week. Howard said this is hard on Robin because how many devoted fans do you have at that caliber. Robin said anyone who is in this battle just tears her up. Howard said he's on 4 pain killers and they can't get rid of the pain. Howard asked if that's what upsets Robin the most. Robin said it all upsets her. She said that people can be so mercenary and you don't know how much they can be.
Robin said there are people who claim they have a cure and they will do what they can to get money out of you. Robin said just do one thing and your email becomes inundated with ridiculous claims. Robin said doctors have been studying this stuff. She said they know what's best. Howard said there's a lot of quackery out there. Robin said she should show him her email. She said that these people are awful.
Howard said he thinks that one of Psych's greatest moments on the show was when they asked bands to cover Revolver songs. He said it was great. He said Psych got inspired and did song parodies of all of the Revolver songs.
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Howard took a call from a guy who said it as inspirational listening to Psych with all he's going through. Howard said he's always been amazed by that guy. He said he's blind and gets around the way he does. He said he's an inspirational guy.
The caller asked if the people who have been victims of Sal and Richard's calls have ever laughed about what Sal has had to do. Howard said he has no idea.
Howard said Psych is the Stevie Wonder of tittie songs. Robin said he has said he's an ass man. She said he threw the tits into the song but it was mostly about ass. Howard said he had a dream to be with Robin and he never got that.
Howard asked Robin if she prefers ass or tittie song parodies. Robin said she prefers the ass. She doesn't like the word tit.
Howard said speaking of phony phone calls they have a new one. He said they had their Rudy Giuliani impersonator call into a show and say ridiculous things and the host didn't call him out on them. He said it was really crazy stuff and the host just went with it. He said there was a bit that someone did on Saturday Night Live or something where the radio host just yes'd the callers with whatever they said. JD said it was Harry Shearer in Wayne's World. Howard said that's it.
Howard said this is Outrageous Rudy Giuliani calling into this radio show. He played the call and the fake Rudy was rambling about a bunch of crazy stuff and the host just went along with it and didn't question anything he was saying.
Howard said no one is listening to anyone else. Robin said she thinks he was listening but didn't know what to say.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he loves the Black Crowes. He said while he was on hold he heard Psych talking about how his worst regret was being girl crazy. Howard said he was getting deeper than just that. He said he thinks he could have done something more with his life if he hadn't wasted time. He said it might not even be about girls. He said he's obsessed with Robin's ass. He said if he had just concentrated on something else. Robin said maybe her head and up. Howard said he's saying his boner ruined his career.
The caller said he also gave up a lot being girl crazy. He said it's like a sickness. He said you think you deserve something better. He said you just want to be out there meeting girls. Howard said they're getting a lot of wisdom from Psych this morning.
Howard said Ronnie has no regrets on wasting time on women. He said he's like ''what's Psych talking about?''
Howard played the clip of Jeff going off on him about not picking up the phone. He said he picks up on everyone else. Jeff went off on him for picking up on Bobo and Mariann. He said Bobo is a fucking douche bag.
Howard said he thought they were over this. Jeff said he was just going off on Bobo. He said he was thrown off kilter. Howard thought he said ''filter.''
Howard asked what's up today. Jeff said he's not sure what he called in for. He asked if he has it written down. Howard said this is why he doesn't pick up on him.
Jeff asked if he thinks that Psych ever makes the noise that Bobo made. Howard had no idea what he was referring to. He told him to call in tomorrow. Jeff said they're not in tomorrow.
Howard asked why he has to bad mouth Bobo. Jeff said it's about air time. Robin said he doesn't care about the show being good. He just wants air time. Howard said he wants a show that people are interested in.
Howard took a call from Bobo who went off on Jeff for calling in with this kind of thing. He said he has no content so he has to talk about what he's doing. Howard said he has to agree that he has no content. Howard told Bobo to bring up a subject and show him how it's done.
Bobo said he heard Gary saying that he'll never hear his own best moment on the show which is his obituary. Gary said he did say that will be the best Bobo day ever when Howard talks about it. Howard said he wont even talk about Bobo that day. Bobo was still going off on Gary about that.
Howard said Bobo and Jeff are boring everyone. He said that's what they've learned. He said don't call in asking why they don't put him on. He said just listen to this call to hear why he doesn't take his calls. Howard hung up on both of them and said he could listen to them all day. He went to break after that.
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Howard came back and said Rachael Ray is there. He said she's having some career. Robin said she's done like 14 seasons now. Howard asked her to let him look at her. Rachael came in and Howard asked if she ever sleeps. He said she's on all the time. He said she has another book out. He said she's done like 14. Rachael said she had a long day yesterday. She said it started before 5. Howard asked what's driving her. Rachael said he likes work. She said she gets really bored when she's not working. She said if she's home she's in the kitchen from the time she gets up until she goes to bed.
Howard said she writes out her recipes in long hand. Rachael said she does that with everything. Howard asked Rachael about laying there in her pajamas and if she will think of something and write it down. Rachael said she does. She said she wants to go to the gala on Friday with North Shore but she's taping. She said she has notebooks all over the place so she can doodle.
Howard said you have to have a capture mechanism to get stuff when it comes to you. He said if you're laying there and something pops into her head she creates it there in her head first. She said she does. She said she wore a negligee one time and her husband laughed at her.
Howard asked if she was in love before she met John, the love of her life. Rachael said you have young loves. She said most men were pissed that she worked too much. She said they're very competitive with that. Howard said she was a cheerleader. Rachael said she was and they only had 54 people in their class. She said no one hit on her. She said there were many other women to choose from. She said she had to go ask the girls if they liked the boys she was interested in.
Howard asked when she had her first boyfriend. Rachael said Tommy Reeger was her first serious boyfriend. She said Tommy gave a pinup of a water skiing heroine to the proctor in her room to get her number. She said he got it from her guidance counselor. She said they ended up going to prom together.
Howard asked Rachael about waiting until she was 37 to get married. Rachael said she liked work. She said when she was a little girl her mom wouldn't make you go to bed if you were doing something creative. She said if she got up and did drawing or writing then you could get out of bed. She said they had to go to school on time though. Howard said her mom was an inspirational woman. Rachael said her mom and grandpa were the number 1 and 2 influences in her life.
Howard asked about her mom having her own restaurants. Rachael said she had 2 and they went bankrupt. She said she ran other restaurants for people after that. Howard said Rachael worked in restaurants herself. Rachael said she was covered in food and she smelled like vomit all the time. She said she had bad skin from that. Howard said she's the hard working woman. He said that turns her on. Rachael said she finds it sexy in other people.
Howard asked if her father was in the picture at all. Rachael said he was on the road selling books. She said her mom was around because she didn't want them out of her sight. She said her mom was top of her class and she was told she could apply to secretary school or marry. She broke every rule and opened her own restaurant and then grew a restaurant business for a man she really admired.
Howard asked if her parents divorced. Rachael said they did. She said she still has her dad in her life. She said he lives less than 30 minutes from her. She said she pays for everything for him. She said she is closer to her mom. She said that they fought a lot when they were together. Howard asked if they were physical. Rachael said some of them. She said she had a great life but it wasn't a happy environment between her ages of 10 and 13. She said she wants everything to be the inside of a snow globe. She said that's her goal. Howard asked if that's good. Rachael said it isn't. She said it puts unhealthy expectations for other people.
Howard asked if the basis of her show is to please people. Rachael said it is. She said it's not her job but she wants to fix everybody. Howard asked if they key to that is a good meal. Rachael said her grandfather was one of 14 kids. She said her mom was 1 of 10. She said her grandfather worked as a stone mason 80-100 hours a week. She said he grew his own food. Howard said you don't see many stone masons anymore. She said her mom was always in the kitchen with him and she was too. She said he was always around while her dad was out selling books.
Howard said Rachael must have wondered why her dad wasn't around her all the time. Rachael said she wants people to be more adventurous every day. That's the goal of her show.
Howard asked if it's too much on you if you're trying to fix everyone. Rachael said that it was good for her. She said that she tries to make people feel good with her programming. She said you should enjoy every day of your life. She said even if it's just in the tiniest way. She said that yearning to fix things is from not having the most perfect of homes.
Howard said Rachael loves the crafts and things like that. She said she does. Rachael said she did 3 shows yesterday. She said that's what they do most days. She said she did a show where they had Adam and Gayle from Oprah's magazine giving out her list. She said last year it was 101 things and this year it was 79 and it was worth over $13,000. Howard said he's obsessed with Oprah and he has to unfollow her. He said he'll talk to her about that.
Howard said Rachael is so driven by work and she worked at a Howard Johnson's. Rachael said her mom ran the restaurants in some. She said they had some great foods there. Howard said they were great places. Rachael said she became a fountain girl and she thought she had the best job. Howard asked if guys hit on her. Rachael said the ice cream chests were right up to her chin. She said that your building blocks for the different ice creams were up high. She said she wasn't able to reach own into the ice cream. She said she had to hoist herself up to get down inside. She said there was a stream of melted ice cream that ran in the front of it so she would get up and have a line between her boobs of melted ice cream. Howard said that's hot. Rachael said it was like she was bleeding vomit.
Howard said her grandfather used to make her a sandwich for school. He said it sounded disgusting. Rachael said he was a 77 year old man and he would make her sardine sandwiches. She said that she would go to school and she was wearing a dress and fancy church shoes on. She said everyone else was in jeans and sneakers. She said she went to lunch and she was an outcast already. She said she took out her lunch and it was her sardines on stale bread with onions and olive oil. She said it stunk up the cafeteria. She said everyone was making fun of her. She said she smelled and everyone hated her.
Rachael said she came home from school crying and her grandfather was laughing in her face. She said the more she cried the more he laughs. Howard said that's sad. Rachael said her clothes were nicer than theirs and she knows how to read but they don't. She said he asked why she was crying after she had him count her fingers and toes and said she had a brain. Howard said he sounds like a great guy. Rachael said he was and she thinks John would have loved him if he had gotten to meet him.
Howard asked what John does. Rachael said he's a lawyer but he's in a band too. She said she was a little nervous about him being in a band. She said they met at a party where there were a lot of tall people and they were short. She said they started talking and he told her that he was a lawyer. She said that she doesn't like lawyers. Howard said he figured that she's making good money and she would like that. Rachael said she gives away a lot of the money she makes. She said that's not why she works.
Howard said it's odd that she does so much for animal rescue and she eats veal and things like that. Rachael said she never promised to not eat that stuff. Howard said he and Beth are all vegetable based foods. Rachael said they are eating vegetable based meals. She said it's not every meal though. Howard asked if she will ever get there. Rachael said she thinks her job is to be the waitress and cook for everyone in the house.
Howard said he doesn't want them killing cows anymore. Rachael said you should eat responsibly. She said she can butcher an animal. Howard asked how she learned that. Rachael said she learned it in the kitchens she's worked in.
Howard said he thinks being a cook makes you a better teacher. He said a chef represents something different. He said they're not teachers. Rachael said there are plenty of chefs who did. She said Emeril and Julia Child were great at that.
Howard said he thinks the Galloping Gourmet made too many jokes. He said you can't do that. Rachael said he loves him.
Rachael got back to John and told Howard how they met at this party. She said that he told her that he's a lawyer but in the entertainment industry. She said that he's also in a band and that scared her. She said then he says he likes food. Rachael said she had taped about 60 episodes of her show for Food Network and they hadn't aired yet. She said John told her he loves to cook. She said you think they say that because they're going to make breakfast for you the next morning. She said he told her what he made the night before and it was something very special. She said she thought he was gay and she tried to set him up with a friend of her's. She said that he told her he wasn't gay but he appreciated that.
Howard asked if he kissed her that night. Rachael said she's not sure. She said he's in the other room so she might have to ask him. Rachael said they have been together every day for the past 20 years.
Howard asked how long you wait to give him the ultimate prize. Rachael said you have to make sure you're mature enough for that. Howard asked how she handled it with John. Rachael said they went to his apartment and they were making dinner together. Howard said it sounds like he was the perfect man for her. Rachael said he's so easy. She said they're very volatile people but John was so easy. Howard said he's the perfect guy. He said he likes him.
Rachael told Howard about how her home life is with John. She said she does the cooking. She said that some days they eat at 6:30 and some are at 10. Howard said he has to eat at 4:30. He said he couldn't live with that. Howard asked what she does for exercise. He asked if she likes Peloton. She said she likes to do her own thing and she wants her own music. She said she doesn't want a Peloton. She said John makes mixes for her. She said she's obsessed with Billie Eilish. She said she's so great with her brother. She said they're both so clever. She said Green Day is crushing it too. She said they're amazing. Rachael said that their new album is amazing.
Howard asked if she ever has a bad day. Rachael said yes. She said when she's sick and can't produce something she's miserable. Howard said if Oprah likes you the whole world opens up for you. Rachael said he had worked on Food Network for like 5 or 6 years before that happened. Howard asked why she never went to formal cooking school. Rachael said she grew up doing it. She said it was a common sense thing for her.
Howard said Rachael sent him something nice. He said she's very sweet and generous. He said she's very thoughtful. Rachael said she created a pizza for Howard. Howard said she made it up herself. Rachael said she thought about what pepperoni would be like as a vegetable. Howard said they made it and it tasted like pepperoni. Robin said she has such an incredible sense of spices. Rachael said you learn that from tasting it. She said you can create those things.
Howard asked if she put that in her new book. Rachael said the book had already come out. She said she'll have to put it in the next one. Howard said he likes the new book. Rachael said she likes talking on paper so she'll have another one.
Howard said she wrote this book at 50. Rachael said she wanted to do that at 50. Howard said she looks good for 50. He asked if she has any Botox. She said she tried it like 6 years ago and she thought it made her eyebrow too far apart. She said it freaked her out. She said she hasn't had anything in like 6 years. Rachael said she went to this woman who massages your face to work your face out. She said it works out your face and makes it tighter. Howard said it just makes you feel pampered. Howard said she looks good.
Howard said Rachael had this 30 Minute Meals show and a TV network offered her a show. He said Rachael wrote to Oprah about turning down a job on a network and she never got an answer. Rachael said she may not have time to answer every letter she gets.
Howard said Rachael gets a local TV show and Al Roker needed someone to do a segment. Rachael said they booked her on the Today show. She said she thought it was a joke at first. She said she went on the show and then the Food Network offered her two shows based on that and her show in Upstate New York. She said that she was doing a show for NPR. She said she's doing NPR today too. Howard asked if she's doing too much. Rachael said she doesn't think so. Howard said his mom would tell her she is doing too much.
Rachael said she takes vitamins and works out. She said she's trying to be healthy. Howard said she still has to make a home cooked dinner. Rachael said she's going to go see a show tonight after going to the Food Network. Howard said she has a lot going on.
Howard asked what she has going on in upstate New York. Rachael said she has a home in the Adirondacks. She said they have a 200 acre property up there. She said they have wild turkeys and stuff up there.
Howard asked what she does up there. Rachael said that she works an John has a music studio so he's going to be updating that. Howard said he might have to come up there to check out the compound. He said he'll come up there but they have to eat by 4:30. Rachael said she can do that.
Howard asked Rachael about Oprah and how that came about. Rachael said she got a call to do that show. She said she was on a book tour and her flight got canceled so she almost didn't make it there. She said she was crying at the airport thinking she wasn't going to make it. She said she did make it and she had brought clothes with her to dress nice. She said her makeup people looked like they were going to cry. She said she looked like she was trying to be Oprah after that. She said Oprah was in jeans when she went out. She said it looked like they had switched clothes.
Howard said Oprah gives her the nod and that's huge. Rachael said she thinks Oprah still owns part of her show. Howard said she must be a cash queen for her. Rachael said she doesn't know about that. She said Oprah has changed the course of her life.
Howard said Oprah put her into syndication. Rachael said it was Harpo and Scripps that were producing the show.
Howard asked if she sees Oprah at all. Rachael said she has Gayle on the show a lot. She said Oprah hosted her 2000th show. She said she changed the course of everything. She said she's a game changer. Howard said she's not a close friend though. Rachael said it wasn't supposed to be that. Howard asked why she's not the chosen one for Oprah. Rachael said that's a creepy thing to ask about. Howard asked if she ever calls Oprah. Rachael said no. She said she's not working there on a day to day basis. She said she has many businesses she's running.
Howard said he tried to steal Gayle from Oprah for a while. He said that didn't work out for him.
Howard said Rachael has 26 books out now. He said she's very busy out there. Rachael said she's very busy doing stuff for her family. She said it's her hobby to write about food. She said she has multiple lines of furniture too. She said she doodles ways to improve the furniture she has. Howard said she blew right past Martha Stewart. Rachael said no one will ever do that. Howard said she has to stop being humble. He said she blew right past Martha. He said she's smiling because she's so happy with herself. Rachael said he's not. Howard asked her to send him a couch. Rachael said the Austin line would look great in there.
Howard said Rachael says she can't cook two things, coffee and toast. Rachael said she burns bread all the time. She said that she just can't do coffee. She said it never comes out right for her. She said it's like John sabotaged her somehow.
Howard said he watches his toast cook. He said he takes it out when it gets dark. Rachael said she has to cook it in the oven when she's cooking for a lot of people. She said it always catches fire in the oven.
Howard asked about who her inspirations are. Rachael said she loves Jose Andres who cooks for the world. She said that he comes through and makes food for people when there's a disaster or something like that.
Howard asked Rachael about having Tony Bennett over to her house and knocking him out. She said she had a freshly waxed floor and he ended up falling down when she was serving him. She said his wife said he'll be fine and he'll pop right back up. Rachael said he did pop right back up and had double portions.
Howard asked if she gets upset with people who put ketchup on eggs. Rachael said you should be able to put whatever you want on anything. She said she knows someone who puts mayonnaise on French toast.
Howard asked Rachael to talk about the time that the NY Times reviewed her book. Rachael said it wasn't a book review. She said that they had an article about people who write all of these books and they said that she doesn't write her own books. She said she has everything in a notebook and she does write them all. She said she can prove that she wrote them all herself. Howard said he loves the NY Times. Rachael said she does too. She said it comes to her house every day. Rachael said she called Gwyneth Paltrow and said she knows that she wrote her own books and she had her on the show to talk about it. She said they talked and defended themselves. She said she does love the NY Times and she said she does write them herself. Howard asked why she didn't sue. Rachael said there's no reason to do that.
Howard said she looks great on her book cover (Rachael Ray 50: Memories and Meals from a Sweet and Savory Life: A Cookbook). Rachael said he doesn't like it. Howard said she's wearing a dress and showing a lot of cleavage. Rachael said there's not that much to show there. Howard said they're being pressed in a way that shows them off. He said it has sex appeal.
Howard said Rachael is very generous. He said he and his wife were behind this North Shore Animal League thing and they built a Rachael Ray room. He said she sends him great Christmas gifts every year too. He said she's too generous. Rachael said he loves it. She said she was a buyer for years. She said she did that professionally for years. She said she was very good at it too.
Howard asked what else she has that she sells. Rachael said they have home wares and utensils. She said she has spice blends too. She said she made one just for Robin. Robin said it's so good. She said she told her how much she likes it. She said she was sprinkling away on her pasta the other day.
Howard said she has gardening supplies and bed and bath stuff too. Howard said maybe he should sell something. Rachael said that they have a group of families in Italy that use only natural vegetable dyes on leathers. She said they pass it down from generation to generation. She said here are no chemicals in the leathers. She said they went to this group and asked to use this product to make things that cost less. She said they asked what they can do for them. Rachael told Howard about how that worked out.
Howard said she has so much going on. He said she has a virtual restaurant too. Rachael said it's great to be a woman at 50 and still be relevant. She said they have Uber Eats doing stuff or them. Howard asked how that works. Rachael said they deliver it to your house.
Howard asked how she has time for all of this. Rachael said she has people. She said they have someone go to Uber Eats to show them how she likes things done.
Rachael said she likes to jump out of airplanes too. Howard asked when she stared doing that. She said about 25 years ago. She said she had a thing on the local news that she was able to do. She said they had a 99 dollar special for sky diving and she did it. Howard said she is something else. Howard said he'd be worried about discount sky diving. Rachael said she did it and loved it. She said once you open the chute it's pin silent. She said you can just hover over the earth imperfect silence. She said it's like 10 years of therapy in just minutes.
Howard asked if she can work her own parachute. Rachael said he can but she prefers to go with the pros who can do flips and spins. She said she likes to be in the pattern thing and backward flip thing. She said once the chute is pulled you're in control.
Howard asked if she threw out a first pitch. Rachael said she did and she threw it over the mound. Howard asked if she saw Gary's pitch. Rachael said she did. She said she had a pitching coach that she used the last couple of weeks. She said she had to get it over the plate. Howard asked if she was shocked at the lack of finesse that Gary had. Rachael said not at all. She said she felt terribly uncomfortable. She said she feels that way any time someone fails at something.
Howard said if anyone out there isn't enjoying life just listen to Rachael Ray. He said you will learn something. He said she has a book out called ''Rachael Ray 50: Memories and Meals from a Sweet and Savory Life: A Cookbook.''
Howard said Rachael is probably a better person than Oprah but she won't admit it. He said she's well on her way to becoming the super mogul. Howard said watch her on 30 Minute Meals and on the Rachael Ray show. He said check your local listings for those.
Rachael said she and Gary had vinyl in common. She said they have about 3000 pieces of vinyl. She said it's crazy. She said they have a record player that floats. She said it's so warm sounding. She said there are great wines out there that have caps on them but there's something sexy about a cork.
Howard said one thing that people don't know is that she wrote two books during this interview. He said that she's inspiring. He said he appreciates her being so generous to North Shore. Rachael said they're doing a lot of good too. Howard said he's complementing her now. Howard said what she did is built a cage free environment for animals. He said they're very happy there. He said they have a cat there who was in a cage for years that they thought wasn't adoptable. He said the cat is cage free now and he's on everyone's lap. He said now he's adopted. Robin said he didn't tell them that. Howard said he winged it.
Rachael said she saw a cat there that was hesitant at first but he eventually got comfortable and ran around the room.
Howard said he didn't get into her throwing a music festival every year in Austin. Rachael said she does and she's close with the guys in Green Day. She said they freed the last chimps used for testing and they have a sanctuary for them. She said they support that with the Nutrish proceeds. She said you want to see something profound you see these monkeys that are out in the grass for the first time in their lives. She said they're touching other chimps for the first time. Howard asked if she's hanging out with Mike Dirnt. Rachael said she is. Howard asked if she hangs with Billie Joe too. Rachael said sure she does. She said that Mike and John have played together. Howard said now she's talking. Rachael said to know them for years now is inspiriting. She said she's seeing them at the height of their creativity. She said it's really something.
Howard asked if she's backing anyone running for President. Rachael said not yet. She said it's too early. She said she doesn't do that on her show though. She said she has to stay in her lane. She said that's not what she does.
Howard gave Rachael more plugs for her book and shows. He wrapped up and went to break after that.
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Howard said he was reading about HArry Harrison getting inducted into the Radio hall of fame. He said he can't remember what station he was on. He said he had that deep voice and his big thing was that name. He said somehow there's a hall of fame for guys like that.
Howard said Jimmy Fallon inducted Ryan Seacrest into the hall of fame. He said they have something going on over there. He said they must have moved it out of that guy's basement.
Howard said look at all the tittie that Rachael has on the cover of her book. Howard said Harry Harrison is 89 years old. Fred played Ronnie yelling ''Sixty nine!'' a couple of times.
Howard said Rachael is sure upbeat. Robin said she had great advice about appreciating where you are and seeing what can come from that. Howard said the greatest advice ever given on the show was taking Metamucil.
Howard said he wishes he had some tape of Harry Harrison to play. He said he could never do what they did. He said they had echo on their voices. He did a little bit of an impression.
Howard took a call from Sour Shoes who was doing a Harry Harrison impression for him. Sour did the echo thing and made a lot of noise. Howard asked where he's been but he didn't answer. Howard said he must have heard them talking about him.
Howard said they should get to some news. He said it was a busy show today. Howard read more about HArry Harrison and where he worked. Howard said look at that career. Robin said that's how you get into the hall of fame. Howard said he thought that's what you had to do in radio. He said he thinks he was able to do that by syndicating.
Howard said he worked with a guy who was addicted to cough medicine so he kept getting fired. He said he would get a job every time though. Howard said he's not sure what happened to that guy.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he didn't know Rachael Ray was sending the proceeds from her pet food to charity. Howard said it all goes there. The caller said that he wanted to call in about Psych. He said you rarely see Robin get emotional. He said he started to get choked up himself. He said the one guy that didn't drop off at all was Fred. He said he was playing drops and all of that. Howard said Fred felt nothing at all. The caller said Fred could have gotten emotional but he stuck with it. Fred said that is his job. Howard said the true broadcaster should be able to show all sides. He said Robin did that. He said he and Fred weren't able to. Fred said Robin is like Walter Kronkite crying when JFK died.
Howard asked what's in the news. Robin read a story about a gymnast that died while practicing. Robin said you don't think it's dangerous. Howard said he never let his daughters do that. He knew it was dangerous. Robin said this young lady was an accomplished gymnast. Robin said Howard didn't even let Emily go down the slide. She said she saw that happen. Howard said he always worried about his kids. Robin said she wasn't able to enjoy anything. Howard said he never went down a slide. Robin said this gymnast was a senior in college and she was doing a routine on the uneven parallel bars and she died 2 days later. Howard said she broke her spine or something. Robin said she did severely injure herself. Howard said he remembers getting on the pummel horse and smashing his balls. He did his impression of his mom telling him he was doing too much. Robin spoke to Ray for a couple of minutes about Howard's childhood. Howard had his dad asking ''Who?'' a bunch of times. Howard had Ray talking about the human body and how pushing it too much means you have to get some sleep. She said you have to use it delicately. Ray was telling Robin that all of her carrying on led to her getting cancer. Howard said you can't argue with her. He did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about 2 people in China being treated for the plague. Howard said he thinks Gary has that. Fred played Gary clearing his phlegm. Robin read about how many cases of that were reported last year. Robin said that the plague comes from fleas that life on these rodents that are infected. Robin said the fleas get on people and animals and spread it. Howard said he thinks they're on to something with Gary not being able to clear his throat.
Howard said that Gary is supposed to be having a vinyl party with Rachael Ray. Gary said he's friends with her Executive Producer and her husband. He said he wanted to get together but he heard they want to host the party. Howard asked him to remind him what the party is. Gary said you have a theme and everyone brings a piece of vinyl. That led to Fred doing the Gary Puppet thing and talking about the party. Gary said Fred Armisen is also a fan of vinyl and might join them. Howard asked why you have to sit in a room with these people. Gary said it's just a get together. He said someone gets up to put something on and you just talk. Howard asked what kind of theme it would be. Gary said he was thinking a cooking or food theme. Howard asked what songs they could play for that theme. Gary said anything with food in it. Howard asked when he last went to one of those parties. Gary said it was in January or March. Fred was doing his Gary Puppet thing and singing songs. Gary said there are a couple of people who might join him for this party. He said Jon Hein is one. Howard said of course they want to go to Rachael Ray's apartment. Gary said they were in before they knew where it was going to be.
Howard took a call from audio book Gary who was rambling about vinyl. The guys played clips from Gary's audio book where he was talking about organizing his vinyl. Howard asked questions and the guys played responses. Robin asked what ''that guy'' means. Gary said people would ask him about music so that's what that refers to.
Howard asked if Gary Puppet is that guy. Gary Puppet said he is. He sang some songs for Howard that were food related. He said anything by Cream would be in there. He liked Lady Marmalade too. Gary told them more about the vinyl listening parties and what goes on. Howard said he's going to kill himself over this. He stopped them from talking about it and had Robin get back to news.
Howard asked if Gary friended him on Facebook. Gary said he did like a year and a half ago. Howard said he was going through the requests and saw that. He said he told his wife he thinks he did. Gary said he did. Howard said he went on Gary's Facebook and he was ready to goof on his posts so he didn't friend him. He said he's going to leave that alone.
Robin read a story about how Ricky Gervais is coming back to host the Golden Globes. Howard said thank god. He said he's actually really good at it. Robin said he really is. She said he loves to piss them off. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about some web site that has predictions about the most popular names for 2020. Robin read through that list and Fred played some Riley Martin clips like Hugh Jasshole and Willie Fistergash.
Howard took a call from a guy who said if Gary has people over for his party he might serve Plantain chips. Howard said he keeps those things locked up in his desk.
Robin read a story about People's sexiest man being John Legend. Howard said he's not sure how he feels about that. Robin said a lot of people are questioning that. She said he is a very romantic man who writes great loves songs. She said she's not sure about sexiest man. Howard said how about Bradley Cooper. Robin said it was Idris Elba last year and he oozes sex. Howard said she's right about that. Robin had some audio of John Legend talking about being chosen as sexiest man.
Robin read a story about Whitney Houston and a rumor that she had an affair with her assistant Robin. Robin said people thought she was that Robin. She said that she couldn't have lasted 10 seconds with Whitney. Robin said this Robin has written a book and she's saying that they were physical early on. Robin had some audio for Howard to play. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about Sarah Palin talking about her problems in her marriage. Robin had some audio for Howard to play. In the clips Sarah said she found out about her divorce in an email from her husband's lawyer. Howard said that woman was almost Vice President of the United States. Howard asked if she's dumping on her husband in this. Robin said not really. She said listen to more of it. Palin was talking about how much she hates the whole system and how they're getting rich off of them.
Howard took a call from a woman who said he is the sexiest man alive. She said he has the chiseled features and he looks great. Howard said he has the chiseled features of a witch. Robin and the caller told him to stop it.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he knows he's in the middle right now but all of the long time listeners think today's show feels like a pinnacle. He said the sad part at the start and the Oprah rant was great. He said it was like he took us all through an art gallery in his mind. He said it was great hearing Rachael Ray too. He said the best interview ever was with her. He said she sat down and spoke like she was in his living room. Howard thanked him for making his day today. Robin said if today was the pinnacle then the rest must be downhill from here.
Robin said 2 in 3 Americans are shivering under this arctic mass that's moving through the country. Robin said it's going to be another cold day today. She said the temperatures are still dropping. She said it may get into the teens today. Howard said most of the staff are protected by blubber. He said this is like their summer. Robin said there are people walking around in short sleeves today in New York. Howard said he knows people like that.
Robin read a story about Hillary Clinton saying she can't rule out another run for President. Robin had some audio of her talking about that in an interview. Howard said he thinks she could have been one of the best presidents we've ever had if she was elected. Robin said there are more people trying get in on this election.
Howard said he got a note saying Benjy didn't wear a coat today. He said just wear a coat. He asked why be cold? He said he sees people like that walking around. Howard asked if he's cold. Benjy came in and said when he was a kid he thought it was uncool to wear a coat. He said he has trouble trying to decide on a coat to buy. He said he wants to get a perfect one. Howard cut him off and thanked him. Then he asked if he got him a coat last year. Benjy said it as very nice but he gave it to someone else who it fit better. Howard said he can't tell if he's putting him on or not. He said maybe he's not. He said he doesn't carry a wallet either. He said he puts his money in a plastic bag. Benjy said he had a problem with that bag. He said he goes to a 12 step program for over eating. He said he was in a meeting and someone passed along the thing to give money. He said he pocketed the plastic bag thinking it was his wallet. He said they laughed when he said it was a mistake. He said he started using a wallet that Wendy the Slow Adult got him.
Jason came in and said someone just saw him drinking salsa straight from the can. Benjy said he just had it. He said he wasn't drinking it, he was eating it. Howard thanked Jason for bringing that in. He booted them out after that.
Robin read a story about the house impeachment inquiry hearings starting today. Robin asked if he's going to watch. Howard said he can't take it. He said he won't be watching. Robin said she heard they won't have first hand information and this is going to be a hard road to go down. Robin said she's not sure she wants to see this.
Howard said he's still thinking about how he has a staffer who doesn't have a winter coat and can't pick one out. Gary said the guys out there are saying they will have first hand information. Robin said she's just talking about what she read.
Robin read a story about Rudy Giuliani writing an Op-Ed about the impeachment and how they can't do that with just six lines in a transcript. Robin said this is all kind of crazy.
Robin read a story about President Carter being out of surgery and they say it was successful. Robin said he's still in the hospital for that. He had some pressure on the brain. Howard said he has pressure on his brain but he leaves it alone.
Robin read a story about the NFL asking Colin Kaepernick to work out and maybe he'll get a job.
Robin read a story about Hong Kong being on the brink of a breakdown because of the protests going on there. Robin wrapped up her news and Howard ended the show around 11:25am.
Today's show was over around 11:10am.
Today's show was over around 11:05am.