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Howard started the show talking about how he was looking at Benjy who shaved off his beard. He said he looks like a little boy. He said it takes 10 years off his looks. Howard said he's not sure which look he likes better. Benjy said he had a lot of hope when he started shaving. Howard said he must have started trimming and went too far. Benjy said he thought it might make him beautiful. Howard said it kind of happened. He said he's gorgeous. Howard said it's like a caterpillar going into a cocoon and it comes out a butterfly. Howard said he molted inside his cocoon and now he's a new butterfly. Robin said it didn't work. She said he's just Benjy. Howard said there's no hiding the blotchiness now. Howard said congratulations on the new look.
Howard asked if he likes the look. Fred said he looks youthful and chubbier. Howard said good for Benjy. He said he's adventurous. Howard said he looks like a young 50 year old.
Howard played a clip of Leon Spinks announcing who they had coming up on today's show. They have Usher coming in. Howard said that was the real Leon. He said he was up there cutting some stuff for them with his wife. Howard said Leon beat up Muhammad Ali. He said not many people can claim that. Howard said he's 63 years old now. Howard said Leon boxed in the Marines and he won a gold medal in the 1976 Olympics. Howard said he won against Ali too. Howard said Ali reclaimed the title 7 months later. Howard said Leon had 5 million in the bank at one time. Howard said 10 years after being the champ he was living in a shelter. Howard said Leon has had some brain shrinkage from boxing. He said you have to think long and hard before going into boxing. Robin said you don't think about going into boxing.
Howard said in 2014 Leon swallowed a chicken bone that punctured an intestine. Howard said he was in a coma and doctors had to operate twice.
Howard said he has to play that clip again to figure out who is on the show. He played it but still didn't understand. He had a Wendy the Slow Adult clip he played to get a clearer voice. Wendy announced Usher is coming in. He played a clip of Wendy singing one of his hit songs. Howard said Usher is some dancer. He said he saw a clip of him with James Brown and he was doing all of James' moves in front of him. Howard said he called him the Godson of Soul. Howard said Usher is in the new movie ''Hands of Stone'' and he plays Sugar Ray Leonard in the movie. Howard said the guy is in really good shape. Robin said he really is. Howard said he's married so Robin won't be dating him. Robin said she should know that. Howard said he wouldn't blame her for stealing him away. Howard said she should just jump on top of him.
Howard said Usher is on The Voice once in a while. Howard said he might have to start watching that show. He said he would watch that if Miley Cyrus is on. He said he's not sure what he's going to watch.
Howard read about Usher selling over 65 million records. Howard said he started out very young. Howard said Puff Daddy toughened him up as a younger man. Howard said Usher was also on Star Search. He said he kept winning on the show so he was on for like 4 months when he was a kid. Robin said he got married secretly. Howard said that's a great move for guys who still want to date after getting married. Howard said he made a big public pronouncement so that was stupid. Howard said imagine he said keep it on the down low.
Robin said that one of her friends had a baby and they sent a picture with the caption ''Hit 'em with the Hein.'' Howard said he has a clip from a sports report where they used ''Hit 'em with the Hein!'' Howard said none of these get fired for that. Howard had a clip of Jason Fielder using it a couple of times during a sports report. Robin said it's become a thing a sports guy can use. Howard said he heard it during a WWE Smackdown show. Howard played a clip where you can hear someone in the crowd using it.
Howard played a clip from a MLB game where the announcer used it. Then he had one from a Yankees game where a fan yelled it out during the game. Howard said Jon has to like this now. He asked if he's enjoying it or is it a defeat because Jason is having his way. Jon Hein came in and said it's a bit of both. He said it's cool hearing all of the sports people doing it. He said for him it's always the intent behind it.
Howard asked Jon if he would make it all disappear if he could. Jon said he would. Robin said she's on the fence about Jon's beard. She said she'd like to see him clean shaven. Jon said the TV show he's on likes to see his beard. He said they light it tight and not growing out too much. Jon said people think he's lost weight with the beard. He said he might keep it because of that. Howard said Benjy looks younger. Benjy said Jon's beard looks too wild. Howard said he likes it when he's more Mountain Man. Jon said he's confused about what to do. Howard told him to just ''Hit 'em with the Hein.''
Howard let Jon go and Benjy asked if Howard has used ''Hit 'em with the Hein'' in his private life. Howard said he has not. He said he uses Baba Booey though. Benjy said he feels like he's copying it in some way. Howard said he should just do it. He said it's like a tribute. He said it's like using ''Hey now'' which is a tribute to Garry Shandling. Howard said he should try using it. Fred said he's not using it either. He said he hits the sound effect though. Robin said she might have used it once. Howard asked if she remembers the context. Howard asked if it was a sexual thing. Robin said it was not. Howard said that would be so good.
Howard said he heard that Gary's wife loves it and uses ''Hit 'em with the Hein'' all day long. Gary said she loves it. Howard said he heard Gary and Mary went out with Jon and his wife and Mary was saying it all night and it pissed off Jon. Gary said that's not true. Howard said he got some bad info. Robin asked if JD uses it. Howard mumbled something that JD might say. Howard asked who is harder to understand, JD or Leon Spinks. Robin said when JD is on a roll he's hard to understand. JD said he doesn't use it. Howard asked if Jon has talked to him about it. JD said he hasn't given him a rule about it. He said something that Howard didn't understand. JD said Jon wasn't thrilled with it at first. Howard asked if Jon told him that. JD said he did. Howard asked how it came up. JD said when it took off someone was pressuring to put it on the air. JD said someone said it out in Detroit and Jason thought it was the biggest thing to happen. He said he made sure it got played.
Gary said there's something going on there. He said it pains JD to pull those clips. He said JD just sits and rolls his eyes while everyone else is laughing. Robin said JD is a good soldier when Jon isn't even there. Howard said JD wasn't going to give him the first public clip but then he did. JD said it was one person doing it because they knew Jason. He said that's why he didn't feel it was worth playing.
Howard said ''Hit 'em with the Hein'' was used in a porno. He played a clip from Brazzers.com where a guy used it during a scene. Howard asked if that was a real porno. JD said they did it for them. Gary said the woman is on a table with her legs in the air and he looks right in the camera to say it. Howard said he's never been on that site. He said maybe he should go there since they support the show. JD said he knows Vick Lagina who works there so he has an account there. Howard said Vick is a very famous porn director. Howard said Robin has heard that name before. Howard asked if his password is ''Creepy Fucker 22.'' JD said no. Howard said he can send him a password so he can go on. Howard said he doesn't have to tell anyone. Howard said he would go on there like 17 times a day. JD said he's only gone there once. Howard asked if he jerked off to anything. JD said he just used it to pull a clip. Howard said he thinks it might be easier to just jerk off to YouPorn where you don't need a password. JD said maybe it is. Robin asked if the porn is better when you have a password. JD said it's higher definition and it has hotter chicks. JD said he's probably seen their stuff on YouPorn. Howard said right. He said he needs some of that high level porn. He said that's the kind of chicks he digs. He said he's not willing to pay. He said he draws the line at paying. He said there's too much free porn.
Howard said his dad would love the porn. He said he's not into computers though. He said he thinks he'd dig it. He said they don't want a computer though. Howard said when they used to get videos he used to give his dad some of that stuff. He said he'd mumble something and walk away. He said he assumes he watched them. Howard did an impression of his dad talking about the porn.
Howard said it took him a year to get a hearing aid. Howard said his dad thought they were trying to rip him off with the hearing aid. He said they thought they were trying to make money off of him but that's what they do. He said they make money. Howard said this went on for months and months. He said his mother stayed on him but she was getting exhausted. Howard said he got the new one and now he loves it. Howard said he thanked her once after months of arguing. Howard said now he walks around like a big show. Howard said he finally got one but it took a long time. Howard said everyone is getting tired of tricking him into doing things. Howard said he thinks he can hear everything but he doesn't. He said he is more with it now that he's hearing more.
Howard said Medicated Pete is there so he has to get to him. He said Usher will be there later. Howard said they called a talk show with his Transgender voice too. Howard said he has to play that as well. Howard played the call that he was talking about. In that the guys called an internet radio show and had clips of Howard doing his Caitlyn voice talking to the hosts about how he was thinking cutting his cock off and how his balls stink from being tucked in his asshole all day. The hosts asked him to watch his language. They threatened to hang up on him. Howard said he just taped his dick to his belly. Then he said it's chafed from sitting on it all day. The hosts told him to call a chat line. They hung up on him. They continued to talk about the call for a short time. Howard went to break after that.
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Howard said Medicated Pete is there. Howard said he has him singing ''Purple Rain'' so he played that as Pete came in. Fred said he can sing to that if he wants to. Pete wasn't singing. Howard said give him a second to sit down. Pete started singing the song. Howard said he loves it when he sings this song. He stood up to sing it according to Robin.
Howard said the dry spit starts to form on his lips as he's singing. Howard let Pete go on for a little longer. Howard asked what that whit shit is on his lips. Pete said it might be from his medication. Howard said it's fucking vile. Howard said he has to do something about that. He said he had to stop him from singing so he doesn't have to see it. He said there's a lot of it there.
Howard said they put together a great video of Pete. Howard said Jason just showed it to him. He said Pete was in the bathroom washing his hands for 10 minutes. Pete said when you don't think about anything you keep going. Howard asked if his hands hurt from washing. Pete said they do. Pete said he's not on the medication right now. Howard said he should be. He said when he's off of it he goes on and on. Howard said he also pulls his shirt up all the way as he's taking a pee in the bathroom. Howard asked if he has a voice in his head that tells him to do that stuff. Pete said it just sort of happens out of the blue. Pete said you have to take yourself out of the loop. He said you could be there all day. Howard asked if that's why he can't say goodbye when he's talking to Shuli. Pete said that he has to just get out of it. Howard played a clip of Shuli talking to Pete and saying goodbye but Pete won't hang up. Shuli won't hang up and he just keeps saying things that keep Pete on the line.
Howard said his favorite call is when they called Pete with clips of Pete. Robin asked if Pete knew he was talking to himself. Pete said he didn't know what was going on. Pete said it sounded like an echo. Howard played the call where Sal called Pete with clips of Pete and had him talking to himself for a few minutes.
Howard said that's the best. He asked what the fuck was going on there. Howard asked Pete why he's covering his eyes. Pete said it's the light. Howard told him to move over but he got up to get too close. Howard told him not to stare at the light. Pete said yeah. Howard said ''yeah'' and Pete repeated. Howard got him into that repeating thing for a minute. Howard asked what's up and what he's doing. He had him repeating and saying things that he says when he's talking to people. Howard asked what he does all weekend. Pete said he was at the beach and he was hanging out trying to pick up women. He said that doesn't go too good.
Howard said he heard something about Pete and some woman. Howard said Pete's 41 years old and he still lives with his mom. Howard said he lives at home with his mom. Howard said he thought he lived with his dad. Pete said his dad is the next town over from them. Howard asked if she's annoyed by him. Pete said she puts up with him.
Howard said the story was that Pete started with a woman on Periscope and this woman was in Florida. Howard said Pete says it's a real woman because he spoke to her on the phone. Howard said Pete did a Periscope and showed her his dick. Howard said now she's sending him lube to jerk off with. Howard asked if they had a sexual discussion. Pete said no. He said he just asked if she wanted to see his dick. Howard asked if he's sure it's a girl. Pete said he has seen her on Periscope. He said she's hot and not fat. Howard asked what's wrong with her. Howard said she can't be over a 3. Pete said he's trying to figure it all out. Howard asked how big her penis is. Pete laughed. Howard said it has to be a dude.
Howard said the woman claims to be single and 45 years old. Howard said there's got to be something wrong. Pete said she did say it was too hot in Florida for him to visit. Howard asked to see a picture of her. Pete said he saw a picture of her. Howard said he's being cat fished. Howard said there's no woman. Pete said he doesn't know. Howard said he should tell her he'll bring an air conditioner.
Howard took a call from Pete's girlfriend. It was The Lump doing his regular voice talking to Pete as his girlfriend. Howard spent a few seconds with her and asked Pete where this picture is. Pete said it's in a text. He said he's trying to find it.
Howard asked Pete why he periscopes and he doesn't see her live. Pete said that's what he's trying to find out. Howard saw the girl and he said there's no way that's her. Howard said she's not showing him video so it's not her. Howard said that chick is way fucking hot. Howard said that's not her. Pete said it's hard to say if it's her or not. Howard said it's not her. Howard said that excuse not to come to Florida gives it away. Robin said that woman is gorgeous. Howard said why not just send Pete a picture of Elle McPherson. Howard said he's being cat fished. Pete said he hopes not.
Pete said she's in the medical field. Howard said he doesn't think so. Robin said it's not nice that people are messing with Pete. Howard said Pete did this one other time and it turned out to be a dude. Pete said he's hoping that one of these times it'll work out. Howard said it's too bad he's not gay because that might work better.
Howard said Wolfie set them up with a woman who interviewed Pete to see how he'd do in a job interview. Howard said he took it seriously and now you know why he can't work. Howard said Pete thinks he did pretty well but he didn't. Pete said he may have over exaggerated on a couple of things. Pete said he was looking for a $50,000 salary. Howard said you've heard a few other interviews with this woman and not it's Medicated Pete's turn. Howard said this woman came there and did the interview in the room with Pete. Howard said once you year this you'll know why he's unemployed.
Howard said in the first clip Pete describes himself. He said he talks about his height and weight. Pete asked what she wanted to know. Pete said he's 41 years old and he has red hair and he's 5'6'' tall. Howard asked if he thought she was blind or something. Howard said that was his description of himself. He said he'd say he likes to work hard and he likes to get up early and things like that. Howard said that's what she was looking for. Pete said he gets that.
Howard said Pete said he hasn't worked in 5 years because of his big personality. Howard played that clip and Pete talked about his big personality keeping him from getting work. Pete also talked about how he'd zone into something when he was asked about his work habits.
Howard said this continues and Pete negotiates a salary. Howard played that clip and Pete said he's looking for maybe 20,000 to 50,000. He said somewhere in there. He said maybe even 10,000. Pete said 10,000 or maybe 50,000. Howard said they're getting down to it.
Howard played another clip where Pete said his last job didn't last because he had a lack of focus. He said he's getting better though. Howard said she was trying to find something he can answer well so she asked what kind of musical instrument he would be. He said he'd be the drums and he started drumming and spitting. Howard said he heard he can play the drums. Pete said he can. He said he's played with some bands before. Howard said he should get into a band and maybe it'll take off. Pete said he's been asked to do that but they never follow through. Howard said maybe he should call them. Pete said he calls people and they never follow through. He said he wishes they would.
Howard played the clip of Pete talking about how he'd be drums. Then he starts making the drum sounds and spittle was probably coming up according to Howard. Howard said the interviewer was soaked after that. He said she had to put on a rain coat. Howard said you don't start doing that in an interview.
Howard said Pete thinks Leonardo DiCaprio should play him in a movie. Howard played that clip and Pete said he thinks Leo is a great kind of guy and he would get him and live in his body and understand things.
Howard said his favorite clip is coming up. He said they asked Pete how he thought he did and he thought he did great. Howard asked if he really thought it went great. Pete said it wasn't negative. Howard said it was so bad. He said it might be the worst one he's heard. Howard played that clip and Wolfie asked how it went. Pete said he'd give it a 7.5 on a scale of 10. Howard said there's no way that's a 7.5. Pete said it's probably a 5. Robin said even that might be high.
Howard played a clip of the interviewer talking about how she'd give him a 3. She also told him not to bring up the Tourette's thing in the interview. Pete said he has it though. Howard said it's good to know. He said you don't have to highlight it.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked if this is the first time Pete has talked to a woman ever. Howard said maybe he could have hit it off with her. Pete said he was attracted to her. He said he was doing it professionally though. Howard asked what he wore. Pete didn't remember. Howard said it was probably jeans and a t-shirt. The caller said he thought it sounded like he was throwing a little game at her. Howard let that guy go and said he didn't know what he was talking about.
Howard said he thinks they may have heard enough. He said this didn't go well but whatever. Howard said they tried Pete to be a phone screener. Howard said Pete liked it but it didn't work out well. He played a clip of Pete talking to a caller who asked if he could talk to Howard about Ben Affleck playing Batman and Daredevil. Pete told the guy he didn't catch that and had him repeat it. Then Pete was talking to him about how it was going and the guy said he had to go. Howard said they never got the Batman question on the air.
Howard said then Jeff the Drunk called in and that didn't go well. Howard played the clip and Jeff said he wants to tell Howard something about tanning his dick. Jeff said this show is getting so lame after Pete asked what he wanted to talk about again. Pete asked what his name is again. Pete asked what was going on and Jeff hung up.
Howard said Pete has bad phone skills. Howard said an Iguana answered the phones and did a better job. He said he did like the way he handled Jeff the Drunk.
Howard played another clip where Speech Impediment Man called in and said he wanted to talk to Howard about voting for Trump. Pete asked what he wanted to talk about after Speech Impediment Man told him what he wanted to talk about. Howard said he could listen to that all day long.
Howard asked Pete what he learned from all of that. Pete said he has some phone skills. Howard said they had Donald Trump call Pete too. Howard played that clip where fake Donald called Pete and Pete asked him about how he's doing and things like that. Fake Donald tried to talk to him but Pete kept talking over him. Trump had Pete saying lines that he wanted him to say. He called him Medicated Mike at the end of that call.
Howard asked Pete what he's doing today. Pete said he might hang out there and go to the gym later. He said he might hang out with Jon Hein. Howard said he seems happy. Pete said he is. Howard asked if he'll go hang at the library too. Pete said he'll pop in there. He goes there to use the computer. Howard had Pete repeating after him saying ''yeah'' and things like that. Pete can't control it so he just says whatever Howard says.
Howard asked Pete if he's endorsing Trump. Pete said it's tough to say. Howard asked if he votes. Pete said he is a registered republican. He said he voted for Mitt Romney last time. He said he's voting for Trump but he doesn't have a lot of political experience. Benjy cracked up at that. Howard asked if he knows why he's republican. Pete said he kind of goes with his family and what they do. Howard asked if his parents are republicans. Pete said they are. Howard said instead of thinking for himself he's just going with what they do. Pete said he can form his own opinions but he doesn't know. Pete said he kind of agrees with the republican thing. He said he does thinks conservatively. He said he is kind of out there. Howard asked where he goes to hang out with republicans. Pete said they have things going on in the town where he is. Howard asked who he hangs out with. Pete said he hangs out with local politicians. He hangs out with the mayor of the town of Red Bank. Pete said it's a tight knit community so people hang out. Pete said they hang out in bars and stuff. Pete said he's in a big Irish area.
Howard asked Pete if the mayor ever asks him for his opinion on anything. Pete said not really. Howard asked what he likes about Trump. He asked if he likes the idea of the wall. Pete said he likes that he's really to the point and he's entertaining too. He said if he can put everything into place is another story. Robin asked what he'd like to see him get done. Howard said Pete doesn't know. Howard asked if he knows. Pete said yes but when he tried to explain Howard said he doesn't have time for this.
Howard asked if Pete would rather have sex with Melania or Ivanka. Pete said Melania. He didn't have a reason. Howard said Ivanka is the daughter. Pete said he feels bad saying that about Ivanka. Howard asked why that is. Pete didn't have a reason. Howard asked if Pete has beaten off to Melania. Pete said no. Howard asked what he beats off to. Pete said he fantasizes about things and thinks about pictures. Howard said he can't jerk off at the library. Pete said he could get arrested for that. Howard asked if he can watch porn at home. Pete said he has internet at home. He said he likes to go to the library to say hello to people.
Howard had a Ivanka Trump on the phone. It was one of the guys in the back calling in asking Pete questions. Howard said he sounds like the girl Pete has been talking to in Florida.
Howard said he knows Pete will be doing some stuff around there today. Howard said the mayor of his town might be a democrat. Pete said he is. Howard said he might want to cool out with the republican thing when he's hanging out with him. Howard said goodbye to Pete and kept him going with the goodbyes for a minute. Howard kept telling him to take it easy and things like that. They eventually went to break. As they went to break they played a phony phone call the guys made to a Swap Shop show using clips of Medicated Pete.
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Howard said the actor Jack Riley died. Howard said he was 80 years old. He worked on a TV show called ''Son of the Beach'' and he was an executive producer of that show. Howard said Jack played homeless Chappy on the show. Howard said he's done and gone now. Howard said Robin would know his face. Howard said he actually employed the guy. Robin said she loved Jack Riley. Howard said he knew she'd know his face. Howard said some of the guys from the show emailed him the other day. Howard asked what the lead guy's name is. Fred said he was Notch Johnson. Gary said it's Tim Stack. Howard said he's going to be pissed that he didn't remember. Howard said Tim and one of the other guys, Dave Morgasen, wrote to him.
Howard said Metallica put out a new song he loved. Howard said the song is called Hardwired. Howard said listen to it. They're out of their mind. Howard played the song and said Fred loves it and just ripped his own arm off and smacked Benjy in the face with it. Howard said the guys are back with a brand new album. Howard said Robin is motor boating herself. He said she's blowing air between her breasts.
Howard took a call from a guy, Chad, who said he was reading about Nick Cannon going to college. Howard said that won't last very long. Howard said he gets enough pussy so he doesn't need to go to college. Howard said he saw what was going down in his dressing room. Howard said he was separated from Mariah Carey for a couple of days and the pussy parade started. Howard said Ronnie can tell you. He said it was wild. Howard said the guys who work with Nick were exhausted from it. He said he was carrying around 6 phones to hide the girls from one another. Howard said it was like a full time job for Nick.
Howard said some colleges these days aren't a real college. Chad said he was posting pictures for the class of 2020. Howard said he'd probably go to school for business. He said Nick likes headphones and pussy. He said that's what he cares about. Howard said Nick has a super tall black dude who hangs out with him. He said he has another guy who hangs out who is super muscular. He said he's a barber and a personal trainer. Howard said the tall guy is just his guy and he's not sure what he does. Howard said he went into Nick's dressing room once and there were 7 girls in there. He said each one was hotter than the next. Howard said now he sees he's dating this girl Chilly. Robin said he claims he's just friends with her. Howard said that's how you keep it from other people. He said he's got the world by the balls. He said he has to slow down for his health though because he has lupus. Howard said he was one of his favorite people working there. He said he worries about Nick. He said he's got a lot of things going on. He said he's going to kill himself with all of that stuff. He said he never sleeps.
Howard said he was supposed to go to some big event on Saturday night. He said it didn't start until 9:30. Howard said even Beth said that was too late. Howard said he just wanted to eat and go to sleep. He said they were in bed by 8:30 or so. He said he's not sure how people do it that late at night. Howard said he can't do it. Robin will do it sometimes. Robin said she's not Nick so she can do it. Howard said Robin has friends.
Chad asked if Beth doesn't want to go out because Howard doesn't want to go out. Howard said he doesn't know about that. Howard said he thinks Usher was at this event and Gwen Stefani and Blake Shelton were there too. Howard said he gets up early at 4 or 5 even when he's not working. Howard said maybe there's something wrong with him. Howard said he's not adventurous. He said everything makes him nervous. He said sometimes he'll talk to people and he spaces out. He said it's too much effort to talk. He said he's not sure why he's socializing.
Chad asked who he's worried about. Howard said he wants to be social but he feels pressure from that. He said you have to answer people back when they talk to you.
Howard said that guy Rivers Cuomo went back to college but he was able to pull it off. He doesn't think Nick is going to college.
Howard said J-Lo was at the event too. He said maybe it's better he didn't go. Howard said he's not sure why she has a problem with him. He said he read that she would never date Howard Stern and gave a violent reaction to the question. Howard said he's not good looking but she could just say she doesn't know him. Howard said she has to let out a ''Ughh!'' Howard said he takes that to mean she doesn't like him. Howard said he saw her at a wedding and she ran away. Robin said he said the same thing about Gwen. Howard said he has to take a break. He did a live commercial read and went to break after that.
Howard came back and said Usher is there and he's in the new movie ''Hands of Stone'' and plays Sugar Ray Leonard. Howard said look at him. Howard said Usher does the fist bump thing. Usher said he got used to that playing Sugar Ray. Howard said he has some abs on him. Howard said he has had to stare at a poster of him since his daughter was like 6 or 7. Howard said she had that in her bedroom like her make believe boyfriend. Howard said he stared at that forever. He said he really does have great abs. Howard said they have to talk about his life. Howard said he has an interesting life.
Usher said he has to thank Marky Mark for taking his shirt off because that's how he got into it. He said he had to perform to show that he had something other than that. Howard said he was told not to wear short sleeves because his arms didn't look good on TV.
Howard said he has to talk to Usher about his life. Howard said he's an 8 time Grammy winner. He had 8 number 1 singles. Howard said that's not easy. Howard said when you think about his early career everyone knew he could sing. Usher said his mom was the leader of the choir in church. Howard asked if he had to do that for his mom. Usher said he had to do it for the lord. He said that was his way to get connected to what he loved. He said he tried football and baseball and all of that. He said when he started singing with his mom in the choir he'd ask her to do things and she'd ask him to sing with her. He said he eventually did that. He said his mom said she wasn't going to take it easy on him. He said he got kicked out of the choir the first week. He said he tried everything.
Howard asked if he had a drive to be famous and well known. Usher said he thinks he was like many young boys who were just looking for something he could be great at. He said his parents were great athletes. He said his dad played basketball and his mom played too. He said his uncle was a football player. He said he tried everything. Usher said he tried playing full back and that wasn't his thing. He said you know it the first day when you get creamed. He said he woke up wondering what he was thinking. Howard said singing is a cool thing now but back then... Usher said he wasn't great when he first started. He said it was something he worked at. Then he lost his voice completely.
Howard said L.A. Reid discovered him. Usher said actually AJ Alexander discovered him. He said in Atlanta there was a talent show he entered. He said he won twice and he was invited back as a guest. He said he was introduced by Brian Reid who was L.A. Reid's brother.
Howard said he was just 13 years old when he got noticed. Howard said his mom quit her job and started to manage him. Usher said it didn't happen that quick. He said they moved after his mother got remarried. He said his mom and dad split very early. He said his dad wasn't around. He said he had a step dad. He said he moved them to Atlanta and that's when things took off. He said he started his career there. Howard said his mom managed him and it must have been nice to have her doing that. Usher said he lived with Sean Puffy Combs for a year. Howard said they did that to give him some street cred. He was only 13 while he was living there. Howard said it must have been a pussy palace there.
Howard said he was on Star Search and he won for like 4 months. Usher said he was on only once. He asked why Howard didn't come to Ron Pearlman's house. Howard said that was too late for him. He said he doesn't go out. He said he heard it was pretty great. Usher said they had a lot of fun. He said the entire party blacked out. He said they had the Roots there and the entire party went black. He said they lost the power. He said they called him up on stage to do some stuff. Usher said he was staying there in a cottage on the property and he realized he was going to have to perform. He said Ron is a great friend so he doesn't mind.
Howard asked what time the party took off. Usher said it really took off around 12. Howard said he'd be sick if he went to that. Howard said he can't do stuff like that.
Howard asked how many songs he did. usher said he did one but it was a mash up that he did with The Roots. He said they were all singing at the party. Howard asked if he gets nervous doing that kind of thing. Usher said it was a big charity event and it helps young men and women like himself. He said the Apollo came up with this thing and they have this party every year at Ron Pearlman's house. He said he's one of the biggest supporters of the arts.
Howard asked if it ruins the night for him to do stuff like that. Usher said you feel compelled to do well. He said you see Sierra, Blake Shelton, Pharrell and others performing you want to do well. Howard asked if he feels compelled because he wants to be in the spotlight too. Usher said no. He said you're just excited about music and they're playing so well. He said he was totally inspired.
Howard said he must be on a high with the movie coming out. He asked if Sugar Ray saw the movie. Usher said Joe Walsh is at the party and killed it. Howard said he didn't know that Joe was going to be there. Howard asked if anyone messed up. Usher said no one did other than the power shutting off. He said The Roots were playing and they had a black out.
Howard asked Usher about being a young kid at 13 and L.A. Reid finds him. Howard asked if all the girls wanted him in school. Usher said he was still in school and he thinks he was confident. He said there weren't a lot of things to be exposed to in Chattanooga, Tennessee. He said he had great moltivators and teachers. He said you have to have that confidence to believe in yourself. He said you find the motivation and do it. Howard asked if he was always a great dancer too. Usher said no. He said today you can learn things online. He said he would mock everything he saw on television. He said at 13 he could remember anything he saw on TV. He said he could just do what he saw on TV and he'd try to do what he saw on TV.
Howard asked what he did for L.A. Reid to audition. Usher said L.A. brought in a bunch of girls to perform with him and he wanted to see if he'd get nervous. He said he did just fine. He said that the rest is history. Howard said then he went to Puffy's house. He said it must have been crazy there. Usher said there were very curious things taking place and he may not have understood it. He said he was focused on his career though. He said he thinks Puff was a idea of what it could be like. He said he realized it wasn't about him. He said that lifestyle was Puffy's and he just watched. He said Biggie Smalls, Lil Kim and others were hanging around there too. He said he was just having a good time. He said he didn't realize just how incredible it was to be around those people. Howard asked if he was the youngest kid there. Usher said he was. He said he was like 15 years old. Howard said it must be intimidating to see all of that going on. Usher said they weren't his chicks. He said he realized that could be his lifestyle some day.
Howard asked Usher if he was like a father to him. Usher said he let him be a young man. He said he had a tutor who helped him out with school work. Howard said Puffy was showing him how the life worked but did he have to do dishes or anything. Usher said he was staying up late at night and staying up later than them. He said he had a per diem going too so he had some income. Howard asked if he was bitter about that after his first album didn't hit. Usher said it gave him a leg up and he was two steps ahead. He said that most young artists are kids when they come out but he was singing about sex in his first album and he hadn't even had sex yet. Usher said he doesn't think it was a bad idea but the agenda was a little different. He said Puff had his ideas. He said Jay Z thought that first album was his best album. He said he thought that was dope that he was a fan from the start.
Howard said Puffy passed on the second album and he must look back and kick himself. Usher said he was always a family member to him. He said he's still a big brother to him. He said he spent time with him and his kids out in Malibu. He said he'll always look at him like a brother. Usher said it wasn't Puffy who said he didn't want to be a part of it. He said it was a deliberate idea to go with Jermaine Dupree.
Howard asked if he would ever send his son off to be with someone like Puffy. Usher said no way. He said that he was in Malibu and his kids were terrorizing everyone there. He said it was great.
Howard said his voice was changing at the time he was at Puffy's. He asked if that scared him. Usher said it did. He said if you don't have the talent people just disappear. He said at 14 you don't understand it. He said it's a harsh reality. Howard said that Puffy kind of did that. Usher said he accepted him even though his voice was changing. He said he had acne and all of that and he still stuck by him. Howard said Puffy must have told him he has to look good. Usher said they told him to take that Acutane shit off because they didn't want him looking plastic. He said they wanted him to fit in with an older audience too. Usher said think about how many kids who are stuck in that place where they can't get out of it. He said he had a career from an early age. He said he didn't have the piercings and stuff that early. He said he did get into some of that later on though.
Howard said when his father abandoned him he must have had a tough time. Usher said he eventually came back into his life. He said he came back and one of the greatest periods in his life was getting to know his father for the first time. He said he has his dad's name of Usher. He said he had to tell him that he can't tell him what to do because he was 20 or 21 at the time. He said he understood that. He said he thinks he wanted to make amends with him and that's why he eventually came back into his life. Howard said he was famous so he must have had it in the back of his mind that's why he was there. Usher said he doesn't think that was it. He said he thinks his dad wanted to get to know his son. He said he had fallen ill and he needed a liver. He said he put his dad in a house and he gave him some money to help. He said he wanted to know his dad. He said he was an incredible person. He said he was very funny and had a great personality. He said he took a turn for the worse though. He said back in those days it was drugs and drug abuse that black men were falling into. Howard asked if his mom was upset that he had a relationship with him. Usher said his mother may not have even known about that. He said she may not even know about it now. Howard said she just found out.
Usher said you need someone to lift you up and see the best in you when you only see the worst in yourself. He said he battled with the whole thing when it was going on. He said he talked to Nelly about it and he wondered why he wasn't going to help the guy to keep him around so he could get to know him. He said it was a very hard thing to do. He said Nelly told him to just do it so he wouldn't have to live with the guilt. Usher said Nelly was the one who pushed. He said he felt like he did the right thing. He said he has no doubt about it. Robin said it all depends on how he feels about it now. Usher said he feels it was the right thing. He said as a kid he may have had it easier not having his dad around. He said his absence became a motivation for him. Howard said that's a very evolved thing. He wondered if that's a religious thing. Usher said he thinks it's a human thing. He said we have to forgive each other for our mistakes. Usher said he has flaws and we're all going to mess up. He said we don't have the right to judge each other.
Howard asked Usher about selling 7 million albums with his second release. Howard said that has to feel great. Then he goes on tour and it's really happening. Howard said he gets so popular that they had to use decoys. Usher said it was a big moment. Robin asked how old he was at the time. Usher said he was 17. Howard said it's amazing he came through that. Usher said he wasn't having orgies like Howard thinks. He said he might have been getting laid.
Howard asked if he has a tattoo of the first woman he had sex with. Usher said he does not. Howard asked how things got for him then. Usher said it was all about entertainment for him. Howard played one of his hit songs ''You Make Me Wanna.'' Howard said this was a departure from what Puffy wanted him to do. Usher said that might have been his own way. Howard said that song was about a threesome. Howard asked if he had two women. Usher laughed and said that's not what the song is about. Howard asked what it's about if it's not about that. Usher said it was about a relationship with one girl who hooks you up with another girl but you want to be with the first girl. He said it's really not about a threesome.
Usher said he'd write songs based on things he'd hear about. Howard asked if the orgy thing is too much for him. Usher said you tell me. Howard said he sits home and doesn't even go to parties.
Howard said the second single goes to number one. Howard played that song and Usher said he thinks he was ready to be there after doing what he did with Puffy. Howard said he had a third hit with ''My Way'' from that album. Howard played some of that too.
Howard said he had a bunch of hit albums after that. Howard said having his mom as a manager must be kind of incestuous. Usher said that they do say not to have your family involved with your business. He said that he would say that you should read every bit of literature about it before doing it. He said you can read about anything you want to know about online. Usher said you have to watch your own money. He said you have to make it a point to understand your business at a young age. He said you should sign your own checks. He said you have to inquire about your own stuff. Robin said that's a lot of stuff for a kid to handle. Usher said you have to do it. He said you have to know where your money is.
Usher said his mother wanted him to have a long career. He said he had an excessive lifestyle and his mom was more reserved. He said the thing to do is to go through all of your finances and know what's happening. He said it's your business and you have to know what's going on. He said with whatever you're doing you have to know what's going on. He said it adds and honesty to the relationship that has to start from the beginning.
Howard asked if his mom would tell him not to buy some things. Usher said she would tell him to be mindful of other things like taking care of the house and owning the house. He said he had money tucked away before he had kids. He said he had a lot of entourage people around and things like that. He said he didn't have a house until he was 22 or 23. He said he spent a lot of time on the road before that.
Howard said the second album comes out and sells 4.7 million copies. He won a Grammy for that album. Usher said he didn't care about the Grammy so much at the time. He said it is an honor to have it but the fans were what he wanted. He said he sold 7 million albums with the first one. He said if you're doing it for the fame that shit will come and go so you're fooling yourself.
Howard said Usher does a great job in this movie and he has done TV and things like that. Howard said he saw the movie and he loved it. Howard said it's the story about Roberto Duran and it's really good. Howard asked if Usher saw it. Usher said he did. He said he didn't feel comfortable with what he had done until Sugar Ray told him what he did a good job. He said he reached out to him before he took the role. He said his wife is the reason that he was able to play the part. He said a few people thought he'd be great for the role and they reached out to him. He said he talked to Sugar Ray about it and he told him he read his book. He said they trained together and they talked about the character.
Howard said Sugar Ray is a really great guy. He said the guy was pretty classy through the whole thing with Duran. Usher said he was poised. He said most Olympic athletes have to carry a certain procession and he never dealt with anyone who was so aggressive. He said that Duran got into his head. He said he beat Ray in the first fight but then in the second fight Ray won.
Howard asked if Usher studied with Ray when he was preparing for the movie. Usher said Sugar Ray had a sweet style. He said he was so smooth. He said he worked the ring and made it look easy. He said the work out was intense. He said he was working out 3 times a day. He sparred with amateurs and all of that. He said you can play golf, basketball or baseball but you can't play boxing. He said you have to do it. He said someone is trying to hurt you. He said you can cause life altering damage with fists. Howard asked if he had to take a lot of punches from it. Usher said he did. He said he thinks he became a good boxer. Howard asked if he's ever been knocked out. Usher said he hasn't. Howard asked how he's done in street fights. Usher said he managed to get himself out of it.
Howard asked Usher about the clips he's seen with him dancing with James Brown and Michael Jackson. Howard said he's doing all of James' moves in front of the guy. He said it was sad to see it because James wasn't able to do them anymore. Usher said he has an energy that you have to experience with him in the room. Howard said he was one of the greatest artists of all time. Howard said Mick Jagger said he would go see him all the time. Usher said he broke down crying when he gave him the name the Godson of Rock and Roll.
Howard said he talked to James about his wife and how he paid for her to get a bigger ass. Howard said that was such a great guy.
Howard asked if he hung out with Michael Jackson or James Brown. Usher said he hung out with James but not a lot with Michael. He said he and Michael did dance together. He said there was a person between him and Michael. He said he wasn't able to look him in his face. He said it's a lot to be Michael Jackson. He said when he got to that stage he was like the greatest performer ever.
Howard asked how the other person was blocking his view. Usher said they were preparing for the show and doing choreography. He said he was trying to talk to the guy and the other guy would lean back and forward as he would lean.
Howard asked if the greatest thing about being famous is meeting your idols. Howard said he is in the movie ''Hands of Stone'' with Robert De Niro. Howard said that movie is incredible. Howard said De Niro plays the part of the trainer for Duran. Howard said De Niro has done some comedies but this is De Niro gold. Usher said it really is classic.
Howard asked if he got to hang with De Niro. Usher said he got to talk to him but he didn't have any scenes with him. He said he was there for every scene he cut though. He said he saw it all going down.
Howard said he read that he celebrated his birthday with him yesterday. Usher said he did. He went to his birthday party. Howard asked if that's surreal to him. Usher said he's still a fan of these people and he's honest about it. He said it doesn't matter who he's with. He said he's still an ultimate fan. Howard asked what he talks to them about. Usher said he's a fan of Howard's too. He said he just wants to hang. He said he wanted him at the party the other night. Howard said he had to go to bed.
Howard said De Niro must be hard to talk to. Usher said that's never been the case with him. He said it's always been great. He said he's always given him sound advice when he asked. Howard asked if anyone has been intimidating to him. Usher said Chazz Palminteri made him nervous but he's not sure why.
Howard asked about his mom not managing him anymore. Usher said she's going to be a part of every decision he makes. He said she was there to support him but also be there for the growth. He said he would not have been in this movie if it were not for Grace. He said she saw something different and she pushed him. He said that they had funding issues with the movie and he had to cancel a tour and an album release. He said he went to The Voice to help him out doing this movie. Howard said he really did a good job in it.
Usher said that his mom isn't managing him now but they're still close. He said they haven't been in a bad spot. He said his wife is there doing that job now. Howard said that must be tough for his mom. Usher said that she just wants him to be happy.
Howard asked Usher about Justin Bieber and how he met him the first time. Howard said Justin came up to him and wanted to sing for him and he said no. Usher said that is what happened. He said he remembers seeing Dallas Austin for the first time. He said it was Keith Sweat and Dallas and he asked to sing in a parking lot. He said then he had heard about Justin and he wanted to sing in a parking lot but he wanted to do it in a professional setting. Howard said then he looked him up online and he came to audition. Usher said he and his friend didn't see eye to eye when it came to that. He said that he didn't want things to be bad. Usher said he felt like this could be an amazing moment for the kid's career. He said he thought he could do a lot musically. He said he wanted to manage the kid. He said Justin was working with another artist at the time. He said they got through it and look at the success he's had. Howard said he's given him a lot of confidence.
Howard asked if he was surprised at the size of Justin's penis. Usher said he's managing that aspect of his life. He said he has nothing to do with that. Howard said he believed in the kid and he's helped him out in a big way. Howard asked if he has thanked him for that. Usher said he hasn't but he thinks that the relationship has been a fruitful one. Howard asked if he's ever advised him on anything. Usher said he has given his opinion and he feels like he's a child to him. He said that no one is perfect. He said that we all have our moments. He said he has had stern talks with him. Howard asked if he spanked him. Usher laughed and said no he hasn't. He said he's wanted to at times though. Howard said he hopes that Usher's penis is longer than Justin's is. He said that would be a shame if it's not.
Howard said it must be tough to do The Voice. Usher said Simon from American Idol invited him to be a mentor on Idol. He said that he thought about it and he thought that it wasn't a hard sell to do the show. He said he knew what he'd offer wouldn't jeopardize what he had built. He said he had his doubts but it ended up being one of the most incredible things ever. He said it introduced him to a new audience too. He said they won an Emmy for that too. He said he had something to do with that. Usher said he'd consider doing something like that again.
Howard asked if he hopes he wins an Oscar for the Sugar Ray Leonard thing. Usher said he doesn't want to say. He said he's worked on other movies and he has worked on TV too. He said he has done a lot of stuff. Howard said he's still a young man too. He said he's like 37 or something. Usher said he's still 22.
Howard said Usher is in the new movie ''Hands of Stone'' which opens on Friday. Howard asked how he handles the women that throw themselves at him. Usher said he's happily married. He said that we are all human and we have flaws. He said his most recent album is called Flawed. He said he's been through enough to have scars. He said he has perspective on all of that now. He said he has a great partner now and he wouldn't want to screw that up. Usher said when you've managed to see the world through the lens he has you value it. Robin said Howard told her she has permission to try to break that up. Howard said he also opens part of the Cleveland Cavaliers. Usher said that's been 11 years now. He said he's very happy to have been a part of that amazing organization. Howard said he's having a great life. Usher said it's all been great. Howard said soon he'll be Mr. Robin Quivers.
Howard gave Usher another plug for the movie and talked a little bit more about what it's about. Howard said it opens on Friday. Usher said the premiere is tonight. Howard said he can't go because he has to work. He said he can't stay up late. Usher said he can stay up late. Howard said he can't do that. He said he'll be there with him in spirit. Usher said it's always been a pleasure. He said that they are true icons. He said he enjoys what they do. He said it's the idea of honesty and he appreciates it. He said he loves both Howard and Robin. Howard and Robin thanked him and went to break a short time later.
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Howard said Usher tried to get Robin on his lap but Robin wouldn't do it. Robin said she's not going to sit on his lap. Howard said she'd get pregnant. He said that would be so great.
Howard said he was with his mother and two of his daughters on Sunday. He said his mother said to his kids that she might be pregnant. Howard said he told her thank god because he wants a little brother. He said his dad said ''I'd like to know who the father is.'' Howard said the sex life must not be so great. Howard said his kids liked it though. He said one of them said ''Oh good my uncle is being born.''
Howard asked if Robin is following the Ryan Lochte story. Robin said she's still trying to figure it out. Robin told Howard what she knows about the story. She said that Lochte claimed that he and some of his buddies were robbed at gun point but it turns out a guard at a service station found them causing damage at the gas station and they had to pay for damages they had done. They paid and then Lochte claimed he had over exaggerated the story. Howard said he figured that the guy is just an idiot. Howard said he's had to live in the shadow of Michael Phelps and now he's just the fucking moron. Howard said they could make a ton of money if they just stay clean. Howard said he's the ultimate ugly American now. Howard said we're in another country and all of this is going on and it makes us look bad. Robin said USA Today is saying that maybe the government isn't telling the complete truth. Robin said they say that witnesses are corroborating what Lochte was saying. Howard asked why he's apologizing then. Howard said if it is true then he should be screaming about it. Robin said they say the gun to the head thing might not be true. Robin said that's where it gets murky. Robin said they say the gun to the head thing might not be true but they're also saying that there wasn't any damage to the bathroom. Gary said they say that the gun was a security guard and not a cop. Gary said they never went to the police to report anything either. Robin said the problems started after the interview Lochte did. Robin said Brazil was upset about how they were made to look like a dangerous place to be. Robin said they may never get to the bottom of it. Howard said he's more confused than ever. He said they should cancel the Olympics. Robin said they were great. She said they say it gets kids into it.
Howard took a call from Mariann from Brooklyn who asked why Robin didn't sit on Usher's lap. Robin said she's not going to jeopardize his marriage. Howard said Usher patted his knees and he told Robin to get on there and Robin said no. Mariann said she could have had something great. Howard let Mariann go and did a live commercial read.
Howard said they didn't play a song for Robin's news. Robin said that's okay. Howard had Fred play one anyway. Howard said that was from Bobby Creepy.
Robin read a story about how kids are more interested in sports after the Olympics. Robin read about what they say is best to get kids up and moving. Robin said they say sports is the best way to get them going. Howard said he wishes he was into sports as a kid. Howard said his wife is ripped and he swears it's from her playing sports when she was young. Robin said he's taking one example and making it apply to everyone. Robin had some audio of someone talking about the best time to get kids involved in sports.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked if he heard that JD's girlfriend got him a record player and he's starting to collect vinyl now. Howard asked JD what he's doing. JD said she likes records and she got him a record player. Howard asked if he's going to do it. JD said she bought one and it's a shitty record player they're sending back. He said he's not sure when. He said they got a couple of albums. He said the record player was shit and it kept skipping so they're sending it back. Howard asked if he's living with her now. JD said she does live there, yes. Howard said he didn't know that. Howard asked if part of the agreement is that she has to have a record player. JD said she does like vinyl. Howard said this isn't JD's fault. He said if he were JD he'd do whatever it took to keep that girlfriend. Howard said he'd buy a photograph and a typewriter if she wanted him to. Howard said he hates vinyl. He wishes it would just go away. Howard said poor JD has to do it. JD said there are some albums he'd like to have but he's not Gary. Howard said he's doing it for pussy, Gary isn't. Howard said he gets it with JD. Howard said that stupid ass Gary is going up to the attic to listen to his vinyl.
Gary said he suggested a record player for JD. He said it's an Audio Technica. He said it's better than the one JD got. He said he's not pushing it on him or anybody. Howard did his Gary voice telling JD to get that record player. Fred played some record scratching sounds as he did that.
Robin asked the caller how he found out about this. The caller said JD put it on Twitter. Howard said Gary is probably happy that JD has a record player. He said now they can all talk vinyl. Howard said he hates that whole movement. JD said there are a lot of people there who have record players. JD said that Jason and Richard have them. Howard said he can see Richard doing that. He said he's off the chart kooky. Howard said they just got record players in Kansas. Howard said imagine wasting your time with that. Robin said you have to have the storage space. Howard said Steve Jobs invented the iPod and you don't need the space anymore. Howard said it all sounds the same. Howard let the caller go after that.
Howard said JD is now collecting vinyl. JD said he's not collecting. Howard asked if the girlfriend uses a Polaroid. JD said she actually does have one. Howard asked if she likes old shit. JD said it's not like that. He said she's into both. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Howard said that JD's girlfriend is going to vote for Adelaide Stevenson. Howard said she's really old school. Howard said they're putting the record player next to the carrier pigeon cage. Howard did his impression of JD talking about that stuff. He had Fred laughing. JD said he doesn't respond to some of the stuff he says. Howard said they're sending smoke signals now. Robin said they'll get a big drum to drum out their messages. Howard said he should move to Amish country. He said they can build stuff with dowels instead of nails.
Robin asked if Howard wrote his will and didn't tell anyone who was in it. Howard said he didn't. Robin said there was a doctor who was pushed off a quarry ledge by two people who thought they were in the guy's will. Robin said they found the body in the quarry on Wednesday and the two men thought they were in the will. Robin said they are accused of killing the guy for the benefits.
Howard took a call from Spoken Word Robin who was asking ''Who in the world is Vick Lagina'' and some other things the guys edited together. Howard said that was very nice. Howard asked her if she would have sat in Usher's lap. Spoken Word Robin said ''You don't know how right you are.'' The guys had Robin saying some other crazy stuff they had edited together.
Robin read a story about Flea from Red Hot Chili Peppers who has gotten to play with Coco the Gorilla. Robin said he let Coco play his bass. Robin had a Red Hot Chili Peppers song for Howard to play. Fred played some audio of Gary doing his gorilla impression playing with that song. Robin had some audio of Flea and Coco together and Coco strumming the bass. Howard said when that Coco story was big they had it set up to interview her but they could only do it in the afternoon and they decided not to do it. Howard said he wondered if she's like Madonna or something.
Robin read a story about Barbra Streisand being upset with Siri so she went to Tim Cook to fix the way Siri pronounced her name. Howard asked if they fixed it. Robin told Howard to check his phone to figure it out. Howard got his phone and asked Siri to say Barbra Streisand.
Robin read about how Lou Pearlman has died. Robin read about the mixed tweets that are out there about him passing away. Robin said that some boy bands members were upset with him for allegedly doing some things to them.
Robin read a story about a guy in the military who has to pay the U.S. Government 6.6 million because of some things he wrote in his book. Howard said he's fascinated with those guys. Robin said the government accused him of putting classified material in his book. Robin said it's made $6.6 million in proceeds so he has to give it all to the government. Robin said he was a Navy Seal.
Howard took a call from Axl Rose who said he was with Coco playing piano. It was Sour Shoes doing the piano playing and the Axl Rose voice. He sang and did a gorilla screaming thing. Howard hung up on him and did a live commercial read.
Robin read a story about what they found when Prince died and how the pills he had were mislabled. Robin said they found that at least one was positive for fentanyl. Robin said he may have taken a pill that was mislabled and died from that. Robin said it could have been a complete accident. Robin said he may not have known what he was taking.
Robin read a story about Elizabeth Smart who was kidnapped at the age of 12 from her bed. Robin said she has become an advocate for children and she's been speaking out about what happened to her. Robin said she says her captor would watch pornography and then rape her even more than before he was watching it. Robin said he would show her books of hard core porn and he was obsessive about the whole thing. Robin said she's speaking out against pornography now because of that. Robin said that guy is in prison now.
Robin read a story about Amber Heard and how they both announced a settlement with their divorce. Robins said Amber is giving all of her $7 million to charity. Robin said she's showing that it was never about the money. Howard asked if she has a lot of money. Robin said she is a model and an actress. Howard said he admires what she's doing. Robin said she's giving it all away.
Robin read that the web site Gawker is shutting down. Robin said they lost a case to Hulk Hogan and had to pay up. Howard said they must be sorry they ever put that clip up.
Robin read about how they're saying that Katie Couric took a million dollar pay cut to save jobs at the Today Show. Howard said he gets the feeling there are way better people out there than them. Howard said that's crazy because these networks have so much money. He said Katie had to cut their salary and NBC didn't cut their profits. Robin said they say in the third year of her contract she took that cut. Howard said he cut his by $3 to save JD's job. Robin said that Katie took that cut just to save the jobs and she didn't want it being made public. Howard said that's pretty cool.
Howard took a call from Jeff the Drunk who said he's getting the lump removed from his neck. He said that's the lump that they made The Lump out of for the show. Howard said he should circle it with a marker so they know which one to remove.
Shuli came in and said Jeff is always on Periscope and he wants Howard to see how many people were watching it. Howard said it's zero people. Howard asked if Jeff is aware of that. Jeff said that was early this morning. Howard said that's amazing. He said he's talking to himself and no one is watching. Shuli said he puts them out on a Friday night and wonders where everyone is. He has no idea they're out doing things. Jeff said fuck you to Shuli. Jeff said Shuli's impression sucks. Howard said he thinks it's pretty good. He said he really likes his Tan Mom. Shuli did that voice for Howard too.
Howard asked Shuli about getting mugged over the weekend. Shuli said it was on Wednesday night. He said he was walking through a park and this homeless dude lunged at him and wrapped his arms around him to pull him down to the ground. Shuli said he turned, pulled his arm off him and punched him in the face and he ran to the train. Howard said maybe that was one of the Jeff fans trying to get to Periscope.
Howard took a call from The Lump who said this is the best day of his life. He said he's actually having Jeff removed from him. He said they should throw Jeff in a dumpster. Howard asked Jeff when the operation is. Jeff said it's on September 19. Shuli said he can't get his arm removed so he's got to get something removed.
Jeff said on CNN over the weekend they said ''Chello.'' Shuli did his Jeff voice and added ''and no one cared.'' Howard asked The Lump if he's worried that he'll grow back. The Lump said he'll miss Jeff's anal fissure. He said he hopes he doesn't grow back. He said the doctors are suggesting that he has the only interesting thing about him removed. He said maybe he'll move over to Medicated Pete's cock. Jeff said we all know you love cock. The Lump said way to keep up. Howard let The Lump go after that. Howard asked if Jeff has a big penis. Shuli said it is pretty healthy. He said that he can't deny that. Howard let Shuli and Jeff go after that.
Robin read a story about what's going on in Louisiana with flooding. Robin read about how many people have died down there already and there was even more rain yesterday. Robin said the governor of the state is asking for help recovering from the flooding.
Robin read a story about a guy who has posted a video online asking where the Black Lives Matter people are now with the flooding going on in Louisiana. Robin had some clips of the guy asking where these people are.
Robin read a story about how that inspired a White Lives Matter movement. Robin said they were out waving confederate flags in Houston in front of the NAACP headquarters.
Robin read about this guy Matt Roberts from the band 3 Doors Down dying at the age of 38. Robin had some clips of their songs for Howard to play. Robin said he was the long time lead guitarist before he left the band in 2012. Robin said he was only 38 years old and his death may have had something to do with drugs. Robin said it looks like an overdose. Robin said they say he suffered from anxiety.
Robin read a story about Jerry Sandusky who is trying to get a new trial. Robin read about what his reasons are for asking for the new trial.
Robin read a story about a protest going on at the Olympics. Robin said that there was a protest from a couple of coaches who stripped down almost naked.
Robin said the movie Suicide Squad is still doing okay at the box office. Robin said it was number 1 for the third consecutive week. Robin said they've made $500 million so far. Robin said Sausage Party was number 2. Robin wrapped up her news and Howard ended the show around 11:25am.
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Howard started the show playing a Leon Spinks announce for the guest they had coming in today. Leon announced that Amy Schumer is coming in. It was barely understandable. Robin asked who that was. They had Leon singing ''The Great American Nightmare'' theme song too. Howard said he's never heard Leon Spinks sing before. Howard let that play for a few seconds.
Howard went to a clip of Medicated Pete who announced that they have Amy Schumer coming in today. Robin said ''Oh!'' Howard said go to HowardStern.com to watch Pete washing his hands. He said he has OCD and it's a ritual. He said he uses like 500 towels to dry. He said he takes the towels and wipes up all of the water and then his hands are dirty again. He said he drops the towels and then he has to wash his hands again. Robin said she feels sorry for Pete.
Howard said they were working with Pete and he was doing phony phone calls and stuff. He said they keep a microphone on him and that's disgusting because he's eating. Howard said they provide free pretzels there and Pete was eating them up. Robin said the cupboard is pretty much bare right now. Howard said he thought it was cool when they first got there that they had that stuff. He said Benjy eats a lot of pretzels. Robin said there's something missing there. She said it used to be loaded up more. Benjy asked if she was looking for pretzels. Robin said no and got frustrated with him.
Robin said even the vending machine is almost empty there. Howard said Artie used to love the vending machine. He said they even had a song about it. Benjy said he cut back on the pretzels for a while. He said he hated it when they were open. Howard said he wouldn't touch them either. Benjy said he's surprised Robin noticed the pretzels. Howard said they should be invisible to Robin.
Howard said Benjy is wearing the headphones in a way to cover up his bald head. Howard said he's always wearing something to cover up his head. Howard told him to push his headphones back. Benjy said it'll be on camera and he doesn't like that. Howard asked if he thinks he's a sex symbol. Benjy said he thinks he has potential but not as a sex symbol. Howard asked if he's going to walk around with a cap on all the time. Benjy said he likes to keep his head covered. Howard told Jason to take a picture of him with the headphones on like that.
Howard said he knew something was going on with Benjy. He saw the headphones on like that and knew. Benjy asked if he ever sees pictures of himself and loves them. Howard said sometimes he takes a good picture. He said he took one with Usher yesterday and you can see the right side of his face. He said sometimes his pictures don't look good. He said he poses very specifically. He said he gets in the same position so he looks like a cardboard cutout sometimes. Howard said he was out somewhere with his wife and this woman came up to him to take a picture. She claimed to be a fan. Howard said he didn't want to take a picture. Howard said she was shocked. Howard said he didn't want to explain it to her that he doesn't want to be on her Facebook looking shitty. Howard said he looks horrible when they take a selfie. Howard said he won't explain that to her. He said he isn't Brad Pitt and he has to have the right angle. Howard said everyone has that same feeling.
Benjy said he thinks Howard has a good face. Howard said he doesn't think so. He said he's got one angle he looks okay at. Benjy said he thinks Howard is a good looking guy. Howard thanked him for that but said he thinks he's a 3. Benjy asked Robin what Howard is. Howard answered for her and said he's a 3. Robin sighed. Howard said sometimes on America's Got Talent they had a camera that would show him from the wrong angle. He said he'd be walking around and they'd get him willy nilly. He said they'd get him from dead on and it was monstrous. Robin said Howard is saying this but a woman called the other day and said he was gorgeous. Howard said she was probably a gargoyle. Howard said Mila Kunis isn't walking in there saying that. Howard said he got a celebrity wife match of Mila the other day. He said he'd bang her hard like he would to Rihannna. Howard said she's some girl. He said she looks dirty. Howard said she's got those tattoos and that attitude. Howard said it's like her shit doesn't stink.
Howard said the only time he's really happy is when he's fucking. He said Benjy has to stop staring at him like that. Howard said he was happy last night when he was eating. He said he jerked off too. He said he was happy after doing his homework for the show. He ate his Eggplant parmesan and watched The Five on FOX News. He said then he went upstairs and beat off to get into bed. He said he has an advance copy of Narcos season 2. Howard said it was just as good as season 1. He said he watched Ray Donovan too. Howard said he loves Liev Schreiber on that show.
Howard said the other thing that's good this year is The Strain. Howard said he got the first 3 episodes of the show. Howard said it's really good. Howard said that's coming back soon.
Howard said Narcos is really good. He said Pablo Escobar is like Superman. Howard said he wants to go home and watch episode 2 now. Howard said he's happy laying in bed watching shows. Howard said that's why he likes TV so much. He said he loves to fuck too.
Benjy let out a sound that creeped Howard out. Howard turned his microphone off. Howard said he was dangerous when he was single. He said he was out fucking people nightly. He said that's not a good thing to be doing.
Howard brought up Doc Gooden and talked about the news story about how people think he's dying and want to do something about it. Howard said the guy just wants to be left alone. Howard said people want to do interventions and they look for celebrities to do them. Howard said he's been asked to do it and he just wants to be left alone. Howard said his psychiatrist has been away for a while now and it's not good. Howard said it's august and all of the weirdness comes out. Howard said he needs a team working on him. Robin asked if he ever asks if he wants someone to help him while he's away. Howard said he doesn't. He said he can get through the month without the psychiatrist. Howard said he's just neurotic. He said he's not crazy. Howard said he's alone all the time.
Robin said he said he used to go on the prowl. Howard said Ralph used to tell him to pace himself. He said he had to go out and do something. Benjy asked if Howard wanted to be alone after he fucked. Howard said he didn't care either way. He said the woman could stay or leave. Howard said sometimes he wanted them to leave. Howard said Robin should have seen some of them. He said she'd want them to leave too. Howard said she'd have to sleep with one eye open. Howard said he was with some lovely people.
Howard said Pat Monahan sent over some of his wine. Howard said it was really good. Sal came in and asked Robin what the hell she's talking about. Howard told him to just play the bongos with his dick. Howard said he wants to play them before Sal and Richard touch them though. Howard played the bongos for a few seconds. He played Wipe Out. Richard said he needs a stand because his legs are muffling the sound. Howard played them on top of his desk and it sounded a little better.
Howard said they even have a little holder thing for them. Howard wanted JD to hold them while Sal and Richard played with their penises. Sal asked Robin to help chub him up. Robin said she'll do that but it's his lip that will be fat.
Howard asked Richard why he has jeans that he hasn't washed in 10 years. Richard said you're not supposed to wash them. He said it shortens the life. He said that you can freeze them and it kills the bacteria. Howard said Sal is standing here trying to chub up while Richard is talking about that. Sal said he just smacked his cock on Richard's jeans. Richard said he has cheese on his jeans now. Gary said he just put his dick on Richard's hand. Richard said the joke's on Sal because he doesn't care.
Howard said Sal isn't going to be able to play the drums. He said Richard has more to play with. Sal banged his penis on the bongos. Richard gave it a try too and he was making some noise. Richard said it hurts a little bit. Sal played along with him.
Howard had Sal and Richard do some solos. Gary said Sal's penis has that extra skin on it so that's why his made more noise. Howard asked how their dicks felt. Sal said he was fine. Richard said Sal's was all skin banging on it. Howard said good for them. Richard said sorry for ruining the bongos. Howard asked if JD enjoyed that. JD said Richard looked at him while he was playing and it was really creepy. He said it was like he was looking at him while he was jerking off. Howard said tomorrow they'll play the violin with their assholes. Richard said one time they were going to play the guitar with their penis when AC/DC was on. They wanted nothing to do with that though. Howard let Sal and Richard go after that.
Howard asked Richard if he's cut back on drinking. Richard said not really. He said it's pumpkin season coming up too so he'll be drinking more. Howard said now they can leave and touch the door handle as they leave. Howard said he has to use cloth to touch the handle every day when he leaves. He went to break a short time later.
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Howard said he may have just scratched himself with a nail. Howard asked Robin to come examine him. Howard said he needs an opinion from someone. He said it's either her or Beetlejuice. Howard asked if he should just go. Robin said in his case he should. Howard asked how you know if you have skin cancer or not. He said he's not sure what it is. He said it's a little spot. Howard said we have to keep him alive or what else will people do in the morning.
Robin agreed to come look at the thing on his face. Howard showed Robin where it was and she took a look but didn't see anything. Robin said there is some redness from where he was poking at it. Robin said it's a little black spot. She said he's turning black. Howard said it could be skin cancer. Robin said it looks like some dead skin. Howard said it could be cancer. Howard asked if he should cancel. Robin told him to go to be sure that something isn't wrong. Howard showed Robin what he was talking about again and Robin said it looks like a scratch to her. Howard said he's falling apart.
Howard said maybe he'll cancel. He said he sees something irregular about it. Howard said it's a pain to get to the dermatologist office anyway. Robin said it's either a pimple or a scratch.
Howard took a call from The Scratch on his face. Howard asked him what he is. He said he'll never tell. Howard said he's going to take him to the doctor today to get rid of him. The Scratch said he loved watching TV with him last night. Howard told him to prepare some jokes before calling in next time. Howard let The Scratch go.
Robin said that skin cancer doesn't pop up over night. Sal came in and said he had skin cancer and people told him it was nothing. He said it turned out to be melanoma. Howard told him not to touch his face or he'll punch him. Sal came over and looked and told him it's cancer. Howard said he's glad he's going to the doctor. Sal said his looked like that. He said his looked purplish to him and that's what cancer was. Robin said there aren't two different colors there. Sal said Robin is just covering her ass. Howard said he's going to go. Sal said the tinge of purple is what tells him it's cancer.
Howard asked Dave if he heard the Nightly Show with Larry Wilmore was canceled. Dave said it was very racist to cancel it just because no one watched it or liked it ever. Howard asked Evil Dave about Caitlyn Jenner's show being canceled. Dave asked how they're going to see her now other than fucking everywhere.
Dave said he had a dream about gargling with Memet's balls. Howard said he still has that biting wit. Dave said he has a self driving car and it wouldn't let him run someone over. He asked if Gary thinks Jon Hein's jizz tastes like horsie sauce.
Howard said he's sure Dave would have fun with Trump if he was still on the air. Dave had a top 10 list of groups Trump needs to kick out after the Mexicans. He read one and had a band playing drum and cymbal. He only got out one. Howard let Evil Dave go a short time later. Howard said bye to Dave a bunch of times and Dave kept saying goodbye with different sayings. Dave said he can smell Gary's breath through the phone. Howard told him to hang up but Dave told him to hang up. They went back and forth with that for a minute. The guys kept playing the Evil Dave clips with Howard. Howard said imagine they do this until 11 o'clock. Howard said ''Hit 'em with the Hein'' and said he's really hanging up. Howard finally hung up. Howard said Dave would not hang up.
Howard said he'd like to get the real David Letterman in there. Robin said he did an interview with Dan Rather. Howard said it was Tom Brokaw actually.
Howard said Rob Burnett put out a new movie. Howard said he saw it and it was good. Howard said he became a Selena Gomez fan. Gary said it was ''The Fundamentals of Caring.'' Howard said the movie was really good and Selena was good in it. Howard said it's about a sick kid who Paul Rudd takes on a trip to get him out of the house. He said they meet Selena on the road and it was a cute movie. Howard said Rob did a nice job with that. Howard said he'd have Rob on the show to talk about it but he won't talk about Letterman.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked if he knows there is a 50 percent chance he's going to leave with a big scar on his face from the dermatologist. Howard said he's going to say he won't sue. He said if it's just a pimple he's not going to take something off. The caller said they may leave him with a 3 inch gash on his face. Howard said this guy is the top guy so he's not worried. Howard said he isn't some hack.
Howard had some phony phone calls to play. Howard said they called this guy's radio show and it was harmless. He said they had a woman call in with her hyphenated name. He said he got frustrated with her. Howard played the clip and the woman gives her name which had about 30 last names in it. The host of the show got pissed and yelled at her about that. The woman said he's been divorced a bunch of times. She tried to go on with the last names. She rattled off a bunch more and the host said hang up on her. He asked what the hell she wants. She said she wanted to talk about Hillary Clinton. She started to repeat the hyphenated last name. The host got pissed again and told her to shut up. They didn't hang up on her though. She rattled off a ton of names until they finally hung up on her. The host said she's banned and she'll never be on the show again.
Howard said he's not sure why he didn't hang up on her sooner. Howard said the guy figured out it was Richard that called so he called and left a message on his voicemail. Howard played that clip where the guy told him to have that woman kiss his ass and Richard can kiss his ass too.
Howard said the guy calls these guys trolls so they had an actual troll call the show. Howard played that call next and Richard had his voice changed to sound like a troll from under a bridge. The host got pissed and yelled at him for calling his radio show. He gave out their number while Richard kept talking as the troll. The host said he wants to know why these trolls call his show. He said he'll track them down and beat the hell out of them. The host said they're banned from his show and hung up on Richard.
Howard said he likes that guy. He said he's good. Robin asked if he's on the internet. Howard said he is. Howard said he predicts he'll be on a real radio station anytime now. Howard did a live commercial read and then went to break.
Max asked if he can play a game. He said he'll do it just for fun. Howard said the guy started out with the ADD thing. Fred said he thinks he meant OCD. Howard said this ADD thing is attention deficit. Howard said he thinks he had that in school because he was bored. Howard said when he's interested in something he's not bored and doesn't have ADD. Howard said he's going to play the hang up game with Max. He hung upon Max a short time later. He said Max won the hang up game.
Howard said he was going to play the number game where he has to pick a number between 1 and fuck you. Howard said he doesn't believe in ADD. He said he thinks it's all BS. Robin asked about ADHD. Howard said that's not real either.
Howard took a call from a woman who he thought sounded hot. Howard asked how old she is. She said she's younger than Howard. She said she's 42. Howard said that's not bad. The caller, Kim, said that she gets hit on at work. She said she's 5'2'' and 110 pounds. Howard said she should be 5'8'' and she'd be perfect. Howard said it actually sounds about right.
Kim said she had a dream about Howard last night but she's not going to get into that. Howard asked about her breast size. She was a B-cup. Howard said that's nice. Howard asked if she's athletic. She said kinda sorta. She said that she's double jointed. Howard said he's thinking about the B-cups. Howard asked if she has tried anal. Kim said no. Howard asked if she's afraid. She said she's sorta, kinda afraid. Howard asked who she looks like. Kim said she looks like Sally Field.
Howard asked if she's easy to get. Kim said no. She said she's had maybe 25 lovers in her life. Howard said she's a hot commodity. Howard asked if she wears panties to work. She said she doesn't wear panties. Howard asked if she goes to work in jeans and no panties. Kim said yes. Howard asked what her favorite position is. She said anything that feels good. Howard asked if she smokes weed. She said no. Howard said that's alright.
Kim said she has a small question for Howard. Howard asked if she's married. She said she's separated. Howard asked what went on there. Kim said Howard has been through that too so he knows. Howard asked how soon after the divorce did she fuck a guy. She said it was a couple of months. Howard asked if she went on a date and wore jeans without panties. She said maybe. Howard asked if she shaved off her bush for the date. She said it's groomed very well. Howard asked if she's on Tinder. She didn't know what that was. Howard asked if she bangs anyone at work. She said no. Howard said she sounds like a fun gal.
Howard asked Kim if she likes when guys kiss her boobs. She said yes. She said no to having her asshole licked. Howard asked if she's good at oral. Kim said she is. She said she feels bad that she called now. Howard said he's interested in her. Howard said he's asking questions about her. She said that's true. Howard said she must like the attention.
Howard asked if she licks the balls. She said no to that. Howard asked what her question is. Kim said Howard said something yesterday about his dad's ears. She said he has said he's talked about the hearing aid. Howard said he did. Howard asked her what she has done crazy sexually. She said she did it on the top of a car in back of a night club once.
Howard asked what she was up to with her work. She said that she works for a company. She was collecting money for something but she didn't say what it was for.
Howard asked if she's working in a place where she can hide from the customer and touch herself. Kim said no. Howard said he bets that her pants are too tight. Kim laughed and said they are. Kim said she loves talking to Howard. She said that she had a dream about him last night. She said they had an affair but they never did it. She said he was living with her. Howard asked what happened. Kim said they were looking for some kind of animal in the house and then she woke up. She said it was weird that they were living together. Howard asked if his penis was big. She said she didn't see it.
Kim asked who made the hearing aid he was talking about yesterday. Howard said he doesn't know. Howard said the whole thing didn't make sense. Howard said they were like 5 grand though. Kim said her mom's are that much too but they suck.
Howard asked if she wears a bra to work. She said of course. She said she had fun talking to Howard. Someone yelled out ''Is that Howard Stern?'' Howard wanted to talk to the guy to find out what Kim looks like. Kim said Dave doesn't want to talk to him. Howard told him to go fuck off. Kim was laughing. Howard said he just wanted to ask Dave what she looks like. Dave wasn't coming over to the phone. Howard said the guy is acting all cunty. Howard said maybe he'll talk to him and she'll have sex with him. Kim said he'd like that. Howard asked how he tells her he wants her. She said he tells her all the time.
Howard asked if the guy is handsome. She said he's a kid. She said she loves young guys. She said he's 25. Howard said he's a wise ass. Howard said if she won't fuck him then Robin will. Howard said he really has to go. He said he'll ask his dad about the hearing aid thing. Howard told her to put her underpants on at work. She said she can't do that.
Howard asked if she moves her bowels every day. She said yes. Howard said the right answer is no. He let her go after that. He said she was a lot of fun. He said he was a little annoying but so what.
Howard said if a guy asks you if you take a dump every day don't say yes. He said you say you don't know.
Howard said he's not sure what his dad is using. He said he was having such a tough time hearing. Howard did his mother's voice and talked about the hearing aid thing. Howard had his mother talking about talking Ben into getting one. Howard said he yelled at his dad to just go try it. Now he loves it. Howard had his dad asking who that is talking. Howard told him it's Robin. He had his mom telling Ben that it's Robin and Ben kept asking who that is. Howard said they're back in time before he got the thing. Howard said his dad didn't think he needed one. He said there was no risk to him because he can try it without being charged. Howard said this is a respectable place they went to. He said 3 months ago they made an appointment to try one out because his dad wanted to wait. Howard said he might not be alive in 3 months. He said just go immediately. He said it's so crazy.
Howard said he has a new song parody about Robin. He played that for her and said it's to that new Rihanna song. Howard asked if Robin likes that. He said it was from Psych.
Howard took a call from Mariann from Brooklyn who said she loves him. She said that she goes to HowardStern.com for the quiz and she didn't do well today with the Amy Schumer quiz. Howard said he took one the other day and only got 7 out of 10. He said it's hard. Mariann said she only got 4 out of 9 today. She said she licensed to the Tracy Morgan interview and Jimmy Kimmel interviews a bunch of times. Howard let her go a short time later.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked if he has watched the new Match Game with Alec Baldwin yet. Howard said he saw it once. Howard said he loved Match Game. He said there was something there with Gene Rayburn. Howard said the celebrities were losers. He said they were only famous from being on the show. Howard said it was weird because one of the panelists was the wife of Jack Klugman. He said that was Brett Summers. Howard said she became famous from being on the show. Howard said he wondered if he would want famous people on his version of the show. Howard said Burt Convey would be on the show and he sat there like he was famous. Howard said Brett Summers would be on the show and announced last. Howard said he's not sure how they passed her off as a famous person.
Fred played the Match Game music and Howard said that was the thinking music. Robin read about people they used to have on that game like James Daily and Joyce Bullefont. Howard said he remembers her. Robin said Nipsy Russell would be on sometimes too. Robin read through some of the other names they had on the old show. Howard didn't know who some of the people were. Howard said it was kind of charming that they had these people on that show. He said they were nobodies and it was the greatest show ever. Howard said the new Match Game he hasn't seen much of. He said having Alec Baldwin on the show makes it too good. He said Rosie O'Donnell is too famous for the show. Howard said Alec's door man should be the guest. He said he's not sure how the show is doing in the ratings. Howard said Betty White and her husband used to be on the show a lot. Howard said Alan Ludden used to be on with her. Howard said he was a game show host.
Howard said if he was the host of Match Game he'd get the woman who did the ''Where's the Beef'' thing or Screech. Howard said maybe not even him. He'd get a girl who fucked Screech.
Howard said he'd get Yucko the Clown on the show. Robin said that's who they should get on the new one. Howard said he'd have James Gandolfini's pool boy.
Robin read some other names of people who were on Match Game. Howard said the people on the show now are too famous. Howard said he'd have Robin's Captain Dennis on the show instead. Howard said that's who they should be having on. Howard said he'd get Juan Pablo from The Bachelor on the show.
Howard asked if Marsha Mason is around. Robin said she is in a TV show. Howard said he remembers her in a movie with James Caan. Howard said she was bent over a pool table and he almost saw her ass and beat off to it. Howard asked why Neil Simon would leave Marsha Mason. He said you'd think he'd be worshiping her.
Howard said he would get some crazy fuckers to do Match Game like Scott Greenstein's maid, Mary Jo Buttafuoco and Elvira and people like that. Howard said that's who he'd have playing the game. He said he'd have Gary Charrone and Sydney Leathers too. Howard said the way they do it now they have people who are too well known.
Howard said he could have Steve Brandano and the inventor of the Sybian on the show. Howard said he'd have Coco the singing gorilla on. Howard said that's the charm of the show. He said you didn't know who the celebrity was or who the contestant was.
Howard said he would have the worst best celebrities on the show. He said he'd have Eric the Actor's handler Jon on the show. Robin said the people on now are too famous. Howard said they are. Howard said he'd have Yaqi the Tickler on too. Howard said he'd keep the same music too. He said what a show that would be. He said he'd have Pauly Shore's dry cleaner and Vinnie Favale on.
Howard asked who came up with this Match Game music. Fred was still playing it. Howard introduced guest after guest. He had Human Numan and people like that. Howard said he would have Steve Langford on too. Howard said he'd reject all of the famous people. Howard named Eron from the Riley Martin show. Robin named some people Howard didn't recognize from the current Match Game line up. Howard knew some of the people. Howard said they used to have one hot girl on the show. He said they'd be kind of hot. Howard said he'd get the biggest group of losers on. Robin read more celebrity names. Howard said they're all too famous. Howard did a live commercial read and then went to break.
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Howard came back and said he's going to interrupt this song and insert himself. He said Amy Schumer is there and she wrote a book which is a memoir kind of thing. Howard said she's a big star. Amy said it's such a violent way to put headphones on. She was talking about the way Gary put them on.
Amy said she was in the hospital because she was coughing so much that she cracked a rib. Howard said he thinks she's doing too much. Howard said she was burning the candle at both ends. Howard said she has a young boyfriend and she's trying to please him and everyone in show business. Amy said he's right except when it comes to sex. She said she just lays there like she's getting a CAT scan. She said Howard is right about the other stuff. Howard asked why she doesn't put anything into sex. Amy said they love having sex but she deals with his balls with her own volition. She said they have sex every day. She said it's not sexy having sex with a girl whose rib hurts.
Howard said he learned a lot about Amy in her new book. Howard said he found some interesting parts in there. Howard asked if she got $8 million for the book. Amy said that's not true. She said she got 100 million and she already spent the money. Howard said he's sure she wrote it herself. Amy said she did and she worked on it with her sister in law and her sister.
Howard said Amy is about to do a world wide stand up tour. Amy said she's going to die so take it all in. She said she got herself sick and she doesn't have time to take off. She said after new year's she's going to take sometime off. Howard said he admires that work ethic. Howard said she's young and she can use that energy to build something great.
Howard asked Amy if she was in the middle of filming a movie when she got sick. She said she did and they had to stop production. She said she felt awful. She said insurance wouldn't clear her to go back to work. Howard said she was working with Goldie Hawn too. Howard asked if she felt a sense of dread. Amy said it was one of the worst times in her life. She said they were in Hawaii and she was bed ridden. Amy said she was there with her sister and things were just going awful. She said she was being drained in there and they had to laugh about it all.
Howard asked if this is the first movie she's done since Trainwreck. Amy said she did another one that was a drama. She said it was called ''Thank You For Your Service.''
Howard said Trainwreck made $135 million. He asked if the scripts are getting better. Howard said they must be. Amy said she was surprised that they cast her for this movie. She said the movie was about PTSD. She said it's a real story. She said David Finkle wrote a book about PTSD and that's what the movie is based on.
Howard asked Amy about how the audition thing went for the movie. She said she tried really hard for it and she ended up getting the part.
Howard said Amy donated her salary from that movie to military families. He said that's pretty cool. Amy said the Goldie Hawn movie is coming out next year. She said they were all in Hawaii and she missed 7 full days of shooting. Howard asked if she sees herself sick in the movie. Amy said not at all. She said they had a great time making it. She said it's such a funny movie.
Howard said when he read that she gave her salary to the military families and she gave almost all of her salary to her crew on Inside Amy Schumer he wonders if she has money. Amy said she makes good money doing stand up. Howard said comedy Central makes good money so they should be paying her crew. Amy said that's not the way it works. She said it felt good to give her crew the money. She said it feels so good to do that.
Howard said Amy was given a $1 million advance for a book and she returned it. Amy said the agent she was working with got her $500,000 and she asked for a million and they got it. Howard said Amy returned the money. Amy said she gave it back plus 50 grand. She was too busy to do it at the time. She said she figured she could do a better job if she waited.
Howard said this time they gave her $8 million. Amy said they did not. Howard said he's just trying to figure it all out. Howard said he heard she went to see Hamilton and she gave a $5,000 tip. Amy said people should spread their money around. She said it feels so good to be able to do that. Howard said that's a great tip. Howard said it was a $77 bill and she gave a $5,000 tip. Howard asked if she's upset that it ends up in the paper. Amy said she asks people not to tell the press but they do. She said it's a lot of pressure now when she goes out.
Howard asked if she feels pressure from these movies and the box office now that she's done well with Trainwreck. Amy said no. She said she is still so naive. She said she's not sure Trainwreck made that kind of money and she's not dying to stay in the movie biz. She said she loves doing stand up and she loves writing.
Howard said Amy played Madison Square Garden. Howard said he wasn't there because he had no idea it was happening. Howard asked if that was the biggest crowd she's ever played. She said maybe it was. She said she has done the Oddball tour too and that's big but it's not just her. Howard said it must be tough to relate to the audience when it's that vast. Amy said it was the best night of her life. She said there were 18,000 people there and it was so cool. Howard asked if it works like it does in a small club. Amy said she's been doing arenas on the road so she was used to it. She said she's doing a big tour soon too so she'll be playing more arenas. Howard said she's the first female comic to play Madison Square Garden.
Howard said he asked Whitney Cummings if she feels the jealousy from other comics after making it big. Howard asked Amy if she feels under attack. Amy said it's not about her. She said that she was friends with some people in the beginning and not a lot of them are left in her life. Howard asked if she has tried to hang with them. Amy said some of them said they can't deal with it. She said she's been doing stand up for 13 years or so and she's been friends with some comics for 10 years. Amy said she's still close with her high school friends. She said it was tough for a while but they found each other again.
Howard asked if she ever goes out to dinner and someone else picks up the bill. Amy said she won't let that happen. Howard asked if Judd Apatow wants to work with her more. Amy said she's sure he would but he's busy doing other things. She said that she has another movie in the works.
Howard said in her book (''The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo'') he noticed a theme. He said he didn't know she was in love with her dad. Howard said she writes a lot about her father but not much about her mother. Howard said he didn't know that she had an affair. Howard asked if her mom got upset about that. Amy said she cleared everything. She said she told her mom she would take the whole chapter out if she wanted to. Amy said she was fine with it.
Howard said the thing that struck him was that her mom had an affair with Amy's best friend's father. Howard said that's like lighting a nuclear bomb in her life. Amy said she was at a good age for that. She was 13. Howard said she was so together at that age. Amy said she felt like they were all in this quest and they were doing the best they could. She said it was really hard. She said she had some anger for her mom but it was mostly just pain. She said it's a cycle of pain and guilt. Howard asked if her mom is still in her life. Amy said she is. She said she read back her journals and her mom made her a support system. She said she was angry about that. Howard said Amy got brainwashed into thinking dad was the bad guy. Howard said he likes that she included the journal in the book. Howard said she should do a whole book about that. Amy said she might. She said she kept a journal from 13 to 23. Howard said that's very good. He said he picked up this thing with her dad.
Howard asked Amy if she drinks a lot. Amy said she has wine every night pretty much. She said her dad used to drink a lot. She said now he's like Stephen hawking so he can't but he sneaks wine. Amy said he's getting ready to get Stem Cells. Robin said they do say red wine is good for you. Amy told her to stop it.
Howard asked if her dad gave the okay for her to write about him shitting in public. Amy said he did. She said that the first time they were at an amusement park and they were going on the roller coaster and they got down once and he wasn't there. She said she was maybe 11 or 12 and he wasn't there. He finally came back and he was wearing not pants. She said his shirt was long and the bottom was all wet. She said he said they had to go. Amy said she got a whiff of what was up when they were leaving so she let her sister sit in the front. She said that they got back home and he asked them not to tell their mom about it. She said he was stripped of all dignity.
Howard asked Amy about her childhood and how they went bankrupt. Amy said things were good until she was about 9 and then it all went away.
Howard asked Amy how long she's been with this boyfriend. Amy said Howard met him the second night they went out. Howard said this is a really long relationship. Howard said Amy dated a guy once who raped her. Amy said she felt it was important to write that. She said she was in an abusive relationship and she thinks it's a good thing for men and women to read. She said that this guy who raped her was in bed while they were half asleep and he was doing stuff to her while she slept. She said she stayed in the relationship with him and it messed her up. Howard asked if she's warning women about how fucked up guys are. Amy said that it's not a perfect rape thing. She said people hear her saying that and they think she knew what was happening. Amy said that they can make victims not want to speak up. She said her virginity was taken from her not in a cool way. She said that she didn't want to press charges against the guy. She said she used to talk about it in her act and she called it Grape because it was a grey area. Howard said he knew better when he was a kid. He said he knows not to put his penis in a girl if she's sleeping. Amy said it's not a grey area about it being rape but a grey area about knowing what to do.
Howard said he knows a lot of women who won't speak out. He said they won't report it and they feel bad for the boyfriend. Amy said it's messed up and not fair. She said it shouldn't have happened to her and she hopes this helps stop it from happening to at least one person.
Howard said he's not sure what the guy's real name was. Amy said it's Ronnie the Limo Driver. She was kidding of course. Howard asked if this guy smacked her around or yelled at her. Amy said he would yell at her and there was some times when he hurt her. She said he would rip the shower curtain down and laugh at her and he pissed on her too. Howard asked why she would stay with a guy like that. Amy said she was in love with the guy. Amy said she's always done well for herself but she thought she was meant to be with this guy.
Howard asked Amy why she stayed and didn't get out. Amy said she loved him and believed him. Robin said he was apologizing and she believed him. Amy said she eventually knew she had to get out. She said she had to do it for her little sister. She said she didn't want her to get that phone call. Howard said she was like a different person in a sense. Amy said she was always a wise ass. She said that it can happen to anyone though.
Howard said with the new boyfriend does she have trust issues. He asked if she thinks he's going to fuck up. Amy said that it's not who he is. She said he is the most gentle guy. She said she will get flash backs though. She said she can freak out. She said she had it happen once with them. She said it probably helped her get closer though.
Howard asked about her describing herself as being an introvert and if she can go to a party and enjoy it. Amy said she doesn't like going to parties. She said it's her worst nightmare to go to a celebrity party. She said you have to wear things that are uncomfortable and talk about stuff you don't want to talk about. Amy said she doesn't like the farce of the whole thing.
Howard asked if she feels like she has to talk and schmooze with people. Amy said she went to the Met Gala and met Beyonce. She said that she asked if that was her first time there. Amy said it was her last and it felt like a punishment to her. Howard said it's like a forced conversation. Amy said she has no interest in fashion. She said she is all for dressing more comfortably but she really doesn't care.
Amy said she was on vacation with Ben and she wanted to go buy something expensive. She said they went to a Prada store and they all say a big ''Hi!' and let them know if you need anything. She said of course she'll let them know. She said she just wants to shop. Howard asked if she knows what to buy. Amy said all she knew is that everything looked whack. She said even if it was $39,000 it was crazy.
Howard said Amy hit it off with J-Law. Amy said she's not out to make celebrity friends though. Howard said she's so self aware and that's what she goofs on. Amy said she has to keep it real with people she is friends with. She said she and Taylor Swift hit it off and she's part of that world now. She can't believe it.
Howard said she almost has to do that though. Amy said that she's friends with Lena Dunham and Jerry Seinfeld and people like that. She said that Chris Rock directed her special. She said she's nominated for an Emmy but she's not going to win because she's up against Lemonade by Beyonce. She said she's not going to win against that. Howard asked how that even happens.
Howard asked Amy about the introversion thing. Amy said Howard is like that too. Howard said he won't go anywhere. Howard said he was invited to a great party but just the idea of going and having to talk would feel like a waste of time.
Howard said Amy hates being stuck in an elevator with people. Amy said she hates the small talk. She said that she doesn't want to go through that.
Howard asked if she has a lower back tattoo. Amy said she does and it's awful. She said it's raised and it's not level. She said it's not symmetrical and it doesn't mean anything so it's stupid. She got it at 18. Howard asked if she would ever get it removed. Amy said it's her mistake and she's keeping it. She said that she likes having it there when she goes to the Four Seasons pool. She said she thinks that it's not a tramp stamp but it is white trash. She said she has a slutty lower back tattoo.
Howard said the book is called ''The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo'' and she's got a web site at AmySchumer.com
Howard asked Amy if she's pulling a Dave Chappelle and walking away from her Comedy Central show. Amy said it's a lot of work to do that show. She said that it's been a big deal for her but it's a draining thing. Howard said it's kind of exhausting. Amy said she has to pick and choose what she wants to do. She said she has to take care of herself. She said her rib hurts. Howard said this season is her last season. Amy said it is and it's not a negotiation thing. She said it's more like a Larry David kind of thing where she can walk away for a while.
Howard said Amy says in her book that she sold weed and shop lifted. She said she was a kid and she did that. Howard said he doesn't think of her as trash like that. Robin said it's more of a troubled thing. Howard said that Amy had to avoid her mom when she was dating her best friend's dad. Howard said maybe that made her sell the weed and shoplift. Amy said she didn't do that for long. She said she didn't sell the weed for long.
Howard asked if success is a great thing. He said he sees on Twitter that people give her a lot of shit. Howard said it's like she's everyone's darling but then people want to shit on her. Amy said she reads that stuff and corrects their spelling. Howard said it's acknowledging those people though. Howard asked if she blocks people. Amy said she does. She said she likes to be able to tell them she doesn't like the way they're talking to her.
Howard asked Amy about teaching herself how to masturbate. Amy said she watched the movie Mannequin. Howard didn't remember the movie. Howard had to be reminded of what it was about. Amy said she masturbated to that movie. Howard said he senses that when he brings up the affair her mom had she doesn't want to remember it or talk about it. Amy said she wanted to write about it and she's happy to talk about it with Howard. She said she's still in pain about it. Howard asked how she found out about it. Amy said her mom told her. Howard said that's brave. Howard asked why she told her. Amy said she was crying and she asked her about it. She said she was excited for her. She said she didn't leave her dad though. Howard said she stuck around in the marriage. Howard asked why she wrote this book. Amy said Howard wrote a couple. Howard said he regrets writing those books.
Howard asked if Amy is going to marry this guy. Amy said maybe. She said she loves the guy. She said they met online through an app. Howard asked what app that is. Amy said she doesn't want to say what it is unless she's an investor in it. Howard said she doesn't care about money that much. Amy said she wants money. She said it's called ''Jews who love big dongs.''
Howard gave Amy another plug for her book. He said it's available everywhere books are sold. Howard said Amy is in love with this guy Ben. Amy said she will lay there for him any time he wants. She said she doesn't do anything. Howard asked why she doesn't do anything. She said she does talk dirty. She said both of them are very giving. Howard asked if she initiates. She said sure. She said she just doesn't do crazy stuff like you see in hip hop videos.
Howard said Amy hasn't done anal yet. Amy said maybe she'll love it when she does it eventually. She said she knows you have to deal with the lube. Amy said no guy has ever cum on her face either. Howard said he'd never cum on someone's face. He said it's insulting. Amy said Howard is such an angel. She said Beth stole him from the rest of them. Howard said no woman wants his load on her face. Amy said Ben cums inside her usually. She said that she's on the Nuvaring so she's not worried about that. She said that it's a ring you put in there for like 3 weeks and then bleed all over the furniture. She said that it's always the tits. She said the belly is boring. Howard asked if the cum smells. Amy said that her boyfriend's cum smell turns her on actually. She said she hopes his parents don't listen to this. She said they're the sweetest people. She said his mom is like a contestant on the Price is Right who just got called down.
Howard asked if their parents have met. Amy said no. She said she's not sure that's in the cards. She said they're not talking about having kids for at least 2 years. She said you have to take care of them. Amy said she doesn't even have a plant. She said she won't even water that.
Howard asked Amy about meeting the parents of the boyfriend. Amy said that sometimes you get a feeling that the mom loves her son so much that she'd want to fuck him. She said this mom isn't like that. She said she's not sure she's even attracted to her own son. Howard asked if they're upset about her being Jewish. Amy said not at all. She said they're really cool. Howard told her to take it slow with this guy. Amy said that they live together. She said that he has a business at TheLastWorkshop.com. She said he's a furniture maker.
Howard said they should sum up. Then he said maybe they shouldn't. Howard said he wishes her success and the book success. Howard said he's sorry her mom fucked this guy. He said he's sorry about everything else too. Amy said thank you. She said she loves Ben. Howard said a couple of guys really shit on her so he's sensitive to that.
Howard said he saw Amy at a North Shore event. He said he saw her in a bikini somewhere else too. Howard said she looked good. Amy said she looked like Ben Rothlesberger next to Beth. Howard had a laugh over that. Howard gave her some more plugs.
Howard asked Amy why she hates couples that work out together. Amy asked if Howard does that. Howard said no. Amy didn't say why it annoyed her. Howard asked if she's contagious. Amy said no one got sick from her. Howard gave her another plug and asked how much she charged for an ounce. Amy said she doesn't remember. Howard gave her more plugs for her web site and all of that. Howard said he'll hug her goodbye even though she's sick. They went to break after that. As they went to break they played Dido performing ''Thank You'' in the Howard Stern Show studio. They also played a song parody about Howard.
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Howard said Wendy the Slow Adult has a message of hope for half human and half retarded people. Howard played the message that she recorded. Wendy said if you see someone half retarded give them this tip. She was talking about how she enjoys her life. Robin wondered if she has happiness or is she depressed. Howard said she's such a positive person. Howard said they had her singing ''I Want Money'' to the tune of ''I Want Candy.'' Howard played the song for Robin and they had Wendy coughing clips in there too.
Howard had a clip of Wendy and JD meeting in the hallway and having a weird conversation. Howard said Wendy was giggling and talking about Cookie Monster and things. Howard played the clip and Wendy talked to JD as Cookie Monster and then demanded that JD talk to her the same way. Howard said he's trying to figure out who the slow one is. Wendy demanded that he talk like that. Howard said he's not sure who was more unintelligible.
Howard said he has a tape of this woman who is his hero. Howard said this guy was jerking off on the train and this woman yells at the guy and he gets off the train. Howard said he can't tell if he was rubbing his dick or not but this women went off on the guy. Howard played the clip and the woman yelled at him to do that shit again and she'll bust his ass. She asked if they understand each other. The woman said she has his picture so get off the train and get the fuck off the train. The guy got off the train. Howard said it was good. He said his wife watched it like 15 times. Howard said some dude would do weird stuff like that to her on the train too. Howard said that's like some Guardian Angel stuff. Howard asked if Robin would love that. Robin said oh yeah. Howard said the guy got right off the train.
Howard said she gave it to JD on the train too. He played a clip the guys put together of the woman yelling at JD. Howard said that's what it would sound like if she did that to JD.
Robin started her news with a story about a new condom from a company called Hex. Robin said the company is doing a crowd funding thing and they have raised more than a million dollars for this condom. Howard asked if they're using lambskin or something. Robin said they are not. Howard asked what they're doing differently. Robin said it's got a hexagonal texture to it. Robin asked if he'd be interested. Howard said sure. He said he's a Trojan man but he'd give it a try.
Howard took a call from Bobo who asked if he caught the Jimmy Kimmel interview with Hillary. Howard said he didn't see it yet but he records the show. Howard said he was listening to Bobo in the car the other day and he kind of got the feeling the audience might be right about not letting him on the air. Bobo said they all have an off day once in a while. He said he contributes a lot. Robin said not lately. Howard had a song parody about Bobo and how they should just hang up on him. Howard said he could play 100 of those in a row. Bobo asked how the feedback was last week about his Kimmel questions. Howard said he gets terrible email about Bobo every day. He said one guy wanted to get on the air this morning to talk about Bobo and he knows Bobo set that up. Bobo said he had nothing to do with that. He said he would never do anything like that and swore on his kids. Howard said he didn't see Hillary on Kimmel. He thanked Bobo for the call. Howard said that was Bobo with his call of the day.
Howard had a clip of Bobo and he says ''You know'' a lot when he talks to Shuli. He said it's a lot. Howard played the clip of Bobo talking to Shuli and saying ''You know'' over and over. He said it like 13 times in 49 seconds. Howard said that's wild. He said he said it 13 times in 49 seconds. Howard said he was listening to it and he was afraid that he'd start saying it too. Howard said meanwhile Bobo knows nothing.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked how much of the show is scripted. Howard said it's all scripted, even this call. Howard asked if he has a script there. The caller said he does and most of the show is scripted. Howard said the show isn't scripted. Howard said when they do an interview they do a lot of research and stuff. Howard let the guy go. Howard said call back and they'll do another take and include that in the show. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Howard said he didn't see Jimmy with Hillary. He said he records a lot of shows but he'll only watch if they have a hot chick on. Howard said he saw that Margot Robbie was on a show and she came out dressed like a nun. Howard said she had this outfit buttoned up to her neck. Howard said this is Margot Robbie. He said he doesn't like that this is who he is but that's what he does. Howard said he turned it off as soon as he saw that outfit. Howard said Kelly Ripa wears a hot outfit and Margot should be wearing one. Howard said she might as well have been wearing a Birkini. Howard said that's how he rolls. He said he doesn't have much fun. Howard said he loves Jimmy but what is Hillary wearing. Howard said he'd watch a funny comedian too on a show like that.
Fred had a picture of Margot Robbie in her dress. Fred said it's like a Little House on the Prairie dress. Howard said they should have thrown her right out. Howard said its like she's trying to get more roles as a nun. Howard said she looks like she was churning butter in the green room. Howard said wake up. That's not what you wear on a show like that.
Robin asked Howard about this guy who survived an execution in 2009 and they want to try again now. Howard asked what the guy did. Robin said he killed someone. Howard said kill him 50 times over. Howard said he likes almost killing the guy and then killing him again. Robin said the execution failed 18 times when they weren't able to find a vein to put the drugs into. Howard said he knows what she's talking about because animals live through being slaughtered and someone like Jon Stewart will save them. Howard said he is against the death penalty unless they know for sure the guy killed someone. Howard said he knows they make mistake sometimes. Howard said he's pissed that John Hinckley is out.
Howard took a call from a woman who asked if they're still thinking about doing the Lenny Dykstra and Ronnie show. Howard said of course. He said that would be triple X rated. Howard said they would talk about sex. He had clips of Lenny and Ronnie saying really dirty things. Howard said they'd have an all female audience vomiting through the whole show. Fred played a bunch of clips and had the caller laughing. Howard said the cunt comments get Robin every time. Robin said the puffy comments get her too.
Robin had a clip from a commercial where they had Maya Angelou speaking. Robin had Howard play the clip which is being used in a commercial. Howard said he hates poetry. He said he's not learning jack shit. He snored while listening to the clip. Howard said he'd rather hear from Spoken Word Robin. He asked her to call in. The guys weren't calling in. Howard said he thought he could make that happen quick.
Robin said Usain Bolt is in the paper and they say he was with some wild women one night. Howard said he thought that guy would behave himself. Robin said it was his 30th birthday. She said maybe it was his last Olympics. Howard took a call from Spoken Word Robin. The guys played clips of Robin repeating some wacky lines she's said and had bongos playing behind her. Howard said that's his kind of poetry.
Robin said that they were talking about Ryan Lochte the other day and he lost a bunch of sponsors. Robin said Usain Bolt isn't losing any. Howard said the Lochte thing was kind of kooky behavior. Howard said Lochte was trying to say ''antics'' in an interview and he said ''tantics'' instead. Howard played that clip. Howard said he thinks that guy has been in the water so much he thinks like a fish. Howard said he spends all day going back and forth in the pool and maybe he bangs his head on the side. Howard said his mother used to wear a big rubber thing on her head to protect her hair in the pool. Howard said it's like that thing the swimmers wear. Howard said god forbid she messes up her hair. He said a lot of women can't do their hair apparently. Howard said he just wanted his mom to enjoy her life instead of wearing that rubber thing on her head. Howard talked about how hideous the thing was. Howard did impressions of his mom and dad for a short time.
Howard said his mom bought him Playboy as a young kid and she told him that those women were freaks and most women look like her. Howard said he was going to hold out for one of the freaks. He did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about a woman on Good Morning America said ''colored people'' and apologized for saying that. Robin said that this woman is a very young looking woman. Gary said she claims she meant to say ''people of color'' but she got confused. Howard asked if she's a swimmer. Robin said this was a news woman. Howard had a clip to play where the reporter said ''colored people.'' Howard said that's a little weird. He asked where she's from. Benjy said she grew up in St. Louis. Howard said the have black people there. Howard asked if she's going to be fired. Robin said she released an apology and an explanation. Howard said he loves when they mess up like that.
Robin read a story about Siegfried and Roy having a Netflix mini series. Howard said he's been saying that's the one thing they're missing from Netflix. Robin said they say it will be a documentary kind of show. Robin said they're sinking $150 million of their own money into it. Howard said he thought one of the guys got eaten by a tiger. Robin said he's in a wheelchair but he's getting around better than he used to apparently. Howard said he wishes they would say ''colored people.'' Howard said he thinks that woman should be cut some slack on that. He said they'll give her the benefit of the doubt.
Robin read about Tyra Banks teaching a class at Columbia University. Robin said she'll be teaching how to build and maintain a personal brand. Howard said look at her. Robin said she says she's excited beyond anything to teach. Howard said he should teach.
Robin said Britney Spears is jumping in to help her home town that was hit by flooding. Robin said they're doing a benefit show for flood relief for Louisiana. Robin said they are going to auction off the outfit she'll wear to the MTV video music awards. Howard said that's a little pervy. Howard said they should bid on it and have Benjy wear it after he shows up late again. Howard said they'll squeeze him into that thing.
Robin read about another sexual harassment suit against Roger Ailes and FOX news. Fred played some JD laughing clips as Robin went through that story. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about Jimmy Carter and how he thought he only had a few weeks to live when he had brain cancer. Howard said then they cured him. Robin had some audio of Carter talking about that. Robin said Carter announced in March that he's cancer free. Howard said Dr. Agus was on with Kelly Ripa and he was saying that they have all kinds of drugs coming out all the time. He said that's what helped Carter.
Robin read about Muhammad Ali's widow opening up about Ali's death in June. Robin had some audio of her talking about his funeral and other things.
Robin read a story about Al Franken talking about standing behind Hillary Clinton. Robin had the audio of Franken talking about how he trusts Hillary to do this job. Robin said he was on Conan O'Brien's show talking about that. Robin had another clip of Franken talking about how funny Hillary is in person. She also had a clip of Franken talking about how they need someone sane and competent and Trump isn't that person. Robin had some audio of Jon Oliver asking Donald Trump to just drop out of the election. Robin said it's kind of a crazy election year. Robin said you don't usually ask someone to drop out, you just don't vote for them.
Robin said there are wild fires going on out in California and they're threatening San Simeon. Robin had some audio of an official talking about that.
Robin read about Donald Trump canceling a bunch of appearances in the West. Robin had audio of his campaign manager talking about why they had to cancel. Robin said they say Trump is still crafting his immigration plan.
Robin read a story about a harmonica legend dying at the age of 94. Howard said Toots Thielemans is known for playing on a Billy Joel album. Howard said he has to confess he hates the harmonica though. Robin said Toots died in his sleep in Belgium. Robin said he stopped touring in 2014. Robin said he was best known for the Sesame Street theme song.
Robin read a story about the Madden NFL 17 game hitting shelves today. Robin said it's been going on for 20 years now.
Robin read a story about Justin Timberlake hosting an event for Hillary Clinton today. Robin said he stepped in at the last minute when Leonardo DiCaprio had a scheduling conflict. Robin wrapped up and Howard ended the show around 11:10am.
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Howard started the show talking about how Benjy loves him so much. He said Fred told him he was staring at him with love. Fred said it was like a guy looking at Margot Robbie. Howard said it's Margot Robbie in a good outfit. Howard asked if she plays Harley Quinn in that movie Suicide Squad. Benjy said that might be why she's dressing the way she has been lately. Howard said she should get used to guys looking at her because it's not going to last forever. Howard said she should enjoy her beauty.
Howard said he passed gas to see if Benjy would hear it. He heard it even though he had his headphones on. Benjy said it was a very smelly one too.
Howard said he makes his doody once a day before or after dinner. He said it goes down around 4 or 4:30. He said it's a whole big thing. He said today he has to go to the doctor for his physical and he has to get the finger up his ass. He wanted to empty out this morning. Howard said if you feel like something is coming on later it's a weird thing. Howard said he's trying to figure out what to do. He said he will have his yogurt and his lunch. He said he doesn't want to push though. He said he's got baby wipes with him just in case. He said he's like a chick getting ready for anal. He said he's all uptight about the finger in his ass. He said he's not sure how gay dudes take a cock in their ass. He doesn't know how they do it.
Howard said he went to the skin doctor and he removed that thing he had on his face. He said it was wart like and he sent it out to get it checked. He said it might not even be enough to get it tested.
Howard said he doesn't want the finger in his ass. Robin said he spends more time thinking about it than the length of the examination. Howard told himself not to think about the finger in his ass. He asked who cares if there's a finger in there. He said it could be a fist or a cock. He asked how he knows it's not a cock. He said he's so filled with dread every day. He said today it's worse.
Howard said toward the end of his day he gets a finger in his ass. He said he might even have a half a doody in there so he can be more embarrassed about everything. Howard told himself not to think about the finger in his ass. He told himself to just pretend it's Fred's finger.
Howard said Robin took a whole cock in her ass and it wasn't so bad the first time. Robin said it was a shock. Howard asked how she got through it. Robin said it was pleasurable. Robin said she wouldn't ask for it. Fred asked if it was all at once. Howard said in her book she described it. She had it at a hotel. Howard said she was so turned on that he went right in. Robin said it was like any love making. Howard asked if he went balls deep. Robin laughed. Robin said she thinks the whole thing was in there. Howard asked if his balls were slapping against her. Howard said it's not the balls, it's the groin. Robin said that is a funny image.
Howard said that's a big cock. He said she took it like a champ. Robin said she wants Howard to do the same. Howard said it's not fun getting that done. He asked Robin what she did when that guy left. Robin said she didn't know the guy but one night she was at home and something kept hitting her window. Howard said it was his cock. Robin said she saw him standing under a lamp light saying he thought he had dreamt her. Howard said she let that douche bag put his dick in her ass. Robin said they exchanged numbers and eventually went out again. Howard asked how he found her window. Robin said he stood outside after he left and he figured out which window was her's. She said they had sex again after that but it was vaginally. Howard said it's weird if the guy sticks it in your ass first. Robin said remember Frank Gifford. Howard said he's a little side tracked with that. He played a song parody about Robin getting it up the ass.
Howard said he's going to sing that during his exam. Robin said now he has something to think about. Howard said he dreads it every year. He said he feels like he just gave this rap to her a week ago. Robin said she understands. Howard said he just wants to move on and get it off his mind. Robin said she has no sympathy for him. Robin said after she read her operation report she never wants to see those people again. Robin said they know more about her than she knows about herself. Robin said they had to keep moving her around so god knows where they were. Howard asked if they showed up at her window throwing rocks. Robin said thank god no.
Howard said he dreads something in his ass. He said what kills him is when they did Prostate Karaoke the other day the guys weren't that rocked by it. Howard said Ronnie heard a finger is better than the probe. Howard said Ronnie was told the finger is better because they can feel for lumps that the probe can't see. Robin said maybe he should have both. Howard said he's not sure what he dreads more, talking to Benjy or the finger up his ass.
Howard said someone was saying that some celebrities get together for their prostate exams. Gary said it was Steve Martin, Tom Hanks and Martin Short. Howard said that's disgusting. He said they don't do it at the same time of course.
Howard had Lee King Snatch on the phone after that. Howard said Kathy never sees that stuff coming. Lee said it's like his own personal attack on Pearl Harbor if Pearl Harbor was a terrible internet show. Howard asked Lee a few questions and asked if he knows actual Japanese. Lee had him say ''Bald dumb shit got no brains'' which meant ''Bobo asks strange questions'' in Japanese.
Lee taught him how to say Benjy is often tardy by saying ''Go fuck yourself Benjy Bronk'' with the heavy Japanese accent. Lee taught Robin how to say I am a newswoman by saying ''Suck my huge black titties.'' Howard spent a little more time with Lee before wrapping up.
Howard said they have other people doing phony phone calls. He said there's a sports show and they do shout outs. Howard said they got them to say Boner and Stinky Bush with their shout outs. Howard played that clip and the guy read the names that were spelled out in strange way.
Howard said they got another show to say Robin's Camel Toe and a Special Healing Hose thing. Howard played that and then went to break.
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Howard said Medicated Pete is there to make an announcement. Pete announced they have Howard's point of view and special guests coming in. Robin asked who is there. Howard said he's there. So is Robin.
Howard said it's the 30th anniversary of finding out Gary has caps on his teeth. Howard said it was so great because he assumed no one knew he had caps. Howard said they're better now but they're still pretty bad. Howard said you can see the top of the gum line on his teeth. Howard said that's the goofiest part of Gary. He said you see his full gum and the top of the teeth.
Howard said he started goofing on Gary's caps at WNBC and Gary asked how he knew and who told him. Howard said it was very obvious and Gary asked if he was serious. Howard said it's an obvious thing. He said they're huge tombstones in his mouth and they're completely exposed. Howard said it's obvious. Howard said it's like asking how he doesn't know that Stephen Hawking can't walk. He said they talked about it on the air after that. Howard said Sal did the song ''Tainted Teeth'' before he worked on the show. Howard played the song. Howard said that's one of the early parodies Sal wrote. Howard said Sal was so full of promise then.
Howard said Robin sang ''The Green, Green Caps of Gary.'' He played that too. Howard said there are so many songs. Howard said they had the band America in and they sang ''The Boy With Horse Teeth.'' Howard played some of that song too. Howard said it was amazing that the actual band sang that song. Robin said at one time those songs were the favorite. Howard said Robin outstripped him about 2 years ago. Howard said now Gary sits on top of show business. Howard said he hopes Gary inspires everyone to brush and floss. Howard said happy anniversary to the revelation.
Howard said they once used audio book clips of Gary talking about his teeth and caps to make a phony phone call. Howard played the phony phone call where they had Gary talking to a woman at a dentist office about his yellow teeth and his bad breath.
Howard said congratulations to Gary on that. He said he was shocked they knew he had caps. Howard said Gary thought he was getting away with it. Robin said they knew the first time they met. Howard said Gary is busy buying bags for his vinyl collection.
Howard said on Labor Day they're going to turn Howard 100 into Booey 100. Howard said they'll have all kinds of Baba Booey shout outs happening that day.
Howard said the first Baba Booey shout out was Captain Janks calling C-Span. Howard had the clip where Janks asked a guy how he feels about Baba Booey and the guy had no clue. Howard said that was the first one ever. Howard said it's the first documented Baba Booey shout out in history.
Howard played a clip from 30 Rock when they threw out a Baba Booey during the show. Robin laughed at that. Howard said David Letterman had a Baba Booey in a top 10 list. Howard played a clip of that too.
Howard said the history of Baba Booey is going to be terrific. Howard said they have celebrities commenting on the songs and all of the great moments. Howard said it's all Baba Booey all Labor Day weekend. He played a Baba Booey song parody after that and laughed as it played. It was to the tune of a Led Zeppelin song. Howard said this is one of his favorites of all time. He said it's simple and classic. Howard said put this on and play it loud all weekend long. Robin asked what's better than this?
Howard said in 2003 Captain Janks pranked Dan Rather after the space shuttle Columbia exploded. Howard played that prank call where Janks said he was in Texas and he hear a loud explosion and a big piece of metal landed on his property. He said they believe it's one of Baba Booey's teeth. Howard said some people thought that was stepping over the line but Janks asked how else he's going to get on the news.
Howard said the most recent Baba Booey was Sarah Silverman saying Baba Booey at the Democratic National Convention. Howard played a clip. Howard said that was a big moment. Robin said it's reached heights they never could have seen.
Howard said his favorite Baba Booey moment of all time is the OJ Simpson call. Howard said it was 1994 and Peter Jennings was covering the chase. Howard played that clip next. Howard and Robin were laughing through the whole thing. Al Michaels chimed in during that prank call too.
Howard said poor Peter Jennings. He said rest in peace pal. Howard said Al didn't give him his due by mentioning his name. Howard played a Baba Booey song parody after that. He said all Labor Day Howard 100 becomes Booey 100. Howard said they'll have tons of Baba Booey songs playing that weekend. Howard played another song parody. He said they'll have songs galore. He said it'll be tons. They went to break after that.
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Howard got into character where he does the Johnny Carson Carnac parody Sternac. Howard has answers to questions that are in an envelope that Robin opens for him. Robin did an intro for Sternac the Improbable. Sternac said this bit never gets old. Robin said she's giving him the envelopes. Robin said they were kept in a place no one goes, her email box. Howard said he's sent her like 5 emails about things and Robin doesn't read them.
Robin said no one knows what's in the envelopes but he will figure out what's in there. Sternac was ready to go. Sternac had the first envelope and said ''Microsoft.'' The question was ''Name two words to describe High Pitch Erik's penis.'' The next one was Pokemon. The question was ''What does George Takei do when he gets drunk in a gay bath house?''
Sternac said the next answer was ''1492.'' The question was ''How does Wendy the Slow Adult count to 10?'' The next answer was ''The Liberty Bell, the Grand Canyon and Kim Kardashian.'' The question was ''Name 3 things with big cracks.''
Sternac said the next answer is ''The Who.'' The question was ''What will my staff be known as when I retire?''
Sternac said the next answer is ''Jerry Lee Lewis.'' The question was ''Name 3 of the many men George Takei fucked in his single days.''
Sternac said the next answer is ''Four score and seven years ago.'' The question was ''What is the first line of Melania Trump's next speech?''
Sternac said the next answer was ''Different Strokes.'' The question was ''What was Riley Martin's official cause of death?''
Sternac's answer was ''Jason Bourne.'' The question was ''What does Jon Hein wish never happened?'' Sternac said he loves inside humor.
Sternac's next answer was ''Adele.'' The question was ''What do you buy when you can't afford a Mac?'' Robin said these are lame jokes.
Sternac's next answer was ''Army.'' The question was ''How will Jeff the Drunk's arm taste?'' That one cracked up Howard and Robin.
Sternac's next answer was the last one. It was ''9 11'' and the question was ''What time did Benjy get into work this morning?'' Sternac said goodbye to everyone. They went to break after that.
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After the break Howard came right back and said he looks at Benjy and wants to throw up with the food orgy going on over there.
Howard took a call from a guy who had a really good phone connection. Howard applauded him on that. The caller said he has counted Ronnie's tweets with naked women. He said he got to 187 and had to stop counting. Howard said he asked Ronnie what's up with that and he says he's retweeting people. He asked what the difference is. Howard asked if he's Ronnie Guccione or the Penthouse of Twitter. He said Ronnie told him he's just retweeting. The caller said it's like 15 a day. Howard said it's goofy. He said he's tweeted a bunch of times during work today. Howard said he just wants a security guy driver who doesn't want to be famous. He said this is all he wanted years ago. He said he wondered why he didn't get appearances.
Ronnie came in and said he doesn't do that during the show. Ronnie said it was at 5 this morning so he can do what he wants. Howard asked why those naked women. Ronnie said he has a ton. Howard asked if it's quality control. Ronnie said there's a couple of guys who send him naked pictures. He said there are two and they send them every morning. Howard said this is what he does. The caller said Ronnie has tweeted over 40,000 times. Howard said he's like Bad Grandpa in real life.
Howard said he thought that there were more than two guys. Ronnie said they had a hole thing with the Hot Chick of the Week so he had to end that. He said one girl was advertising that she was part of the show so he shut that down. Howard said now he's retweeting women. Ronnie said he'll put up a picture of the girl has a hot ass. He said no pussy pictures though. Robin said he's Playboy, not Hustler. Ronnie said that's right. He said it's too graphic. Ronnie said this guy Emilio puts up a lot of stuff. He said he's got cancer or something. He said he thinks he's sick and can't leave the house. Howard asked what this is leading to. Ronnie said nothing. Howard asked where this is leading. Ronnie said it's no thrill. He said it's a time killer. He said he just kills time doing it. Howard said he should read a book. Ronnie said it'd dark out. Howard said he must like the fame. Ronnie said he has a lot of followers. Howard said he must enjoy it. Ronnie said he's not getting paid for it. He said it's just fun.
Howard asked if he gets a thrill from seeing the naked women. Ronnie said they are hot. He said he won't put one up that's not hot. Howard said they did find a vagina picture. Howard asked what she's doing in it. Ronnie said it might be an ass picture and you see her vagina sticking out a little bit.
Brent Hatley came in and said you can see her beaver in the bent over picture. Ronnie said that's not his fault. Brent said that's a beaver shot. Ronnie said he's not putting vagina up there. He said you're not seeing her red, puffy cunt. Howard said it's still vagina. Brent said this was recent on August 18th. Howard said he will put vagina on there. Ronnie said it's very slight. Brent said it's not at all. He said it's the middle of the shot.
Howard asked Brent what he thinks Ronnie's end game is. Brent said he might be showing he's young and hip and cool like one of the guys. Howard said he might be right. Howard said Brent studies Ronnie. Brent said he's fascinated by him.
Howard said Ronnie puts emojis next to the girls. Ronnie said he doesn't write anything. He said he only retweets. He said sometimes he'll answer someone and use the devil horns. Howard said he uses that emoji and the ''Yeah duu'' thing.
Howard saw the picture of the woman's vagina. Howard said that's vagina. Ronnie said he's not posting it as a vagina picture. He said he hear he posted another vagina picture on the 16th too. Howard said he's coming off like a douche when he does the emoji thing. Howard said he's trying too hard.
Howard said it's not even the naked pictures. He said it's the devil emoji. Ronnie said he's responding to people. He said he's not commenting on the picture. Brent said he is though. He said the response is under the picture. Ronnie said now he's lying. He said he'll respond to someone but not under the pictures. Brent said his Twitter handle is RMLimoDriver69 so he has the 69 in there too. Howard said there's the other vagina shot. Howard said this one's vagina is hanging like a cock. Howard said she's got a great ass but that's not on his Twitter account. Howard said that chick may have balls too.
Howard said he's just saying maybe Ronnie should rethink this. He said he knows a guy who is the guy sending him titty pictures of girls. He said it's not Ronnie but that's what the perception of Ronnie is. Howard said he also loves posting naked pictures with women holding coffee. Ronnie said he's retweeting that guy's stuff. He said he likes an ass and he'll retweets it. He said he likes the coffee stuff because it's saying good morning for the Stern Show.
Ronnie said he's not posting women with their legs spread. Brent said he's posting the rear burger stuff though. Ronnie said Brent used to be the dirtiest guy on the air. He said now he's calling him out on it. Howard said no one can take their mind off of him. Howard said Ronnie isn't sure why he's retweeting Emilio's pictures. Ronnie asked what the big deal is. He said he's just having a good time with everyone. He said it's like being on CB radio years ago. Ronnie said it's the same shit.
Howard said they should call the FBI on Emilio, not retweet him. Ronnie asked what the guy did wrong. Howard said nothing that they know of. Ronnie said he makes the guy's day because he's sick. Howard said Jerry Sandusky blocked Ronnie because he thought it was sick. Ronnie said he hates it when there are no guests on the show.
Howard read some tweets that Ronnie posted about some girls. He had 4 devil emojis. Howard asked what that means. He was talking about the Swiss Volleyball team. Ronnie said it's just a bad boy thing. Howard asked if he's ever given 5. Ronnie said he doesn't know. Ronnie said he didn't know Brent was so busy studying him. Howard said that guy Jared from Subway even told Ronnie to calm down with that stuff.
Howard said Ronnie's devil emojis mean he wants to do something evil to those girls. Ronnie said don't put words in his mouth. He said it's a goof. He said it's just a bad boy comment.
Howard asked the caller, Nick, what he makes of all of this. Ronnie asked how old the guy is and what he does. Howard said he's 36. Nick said he works in the insurance industry in Boston. Nick said if you're over 30 you shouldn't use emojis. Ronnie asked if there's a law about that. Howard said Ronnie has tweeted over 30,000 times on his Twitter. Ronnie said that's right. Nick said he's a weirdo.
Howard said his friend Emilio is on the phone. He took a call from him and it was one of the guys doing a Ronnie-like voice talking about why he does that stuff. He said he sits around looking at naked pictures and then sends them to Ronnie.
Howard took a call from King of All Blacks who said he didn't jump to this conclusion lightly. He said he has figured out Ronnie. He said what he's trying to do is separate himself from Howard. He wants fame but not from Howard. Howard said that might be it. Nick said this is coming from a guy who tweets pictures of feet all day. King said he's street famous. He said he's not show famous.
King asked if Ronnie's girlfriend gets jealous of this stuff. Ronnie said no. King said that means she doesn't really like it. Howard said he thinks she's fine with it. Brent asked if he's ever had a threesome with her. Ronnie said that's none of his business.
Howard asked King if he knows who drives Jimmy Fallon's limo. King said no. Howard asked if he knows Colbert's driver. King said no. Howard said he doesn't know Jimmy Kimmel's driver either. Howard said Ronnie is building something.
Howard asked what the Ronnie thing is they have on HowardStern.com. Jason said they have Ronnie typing on his phone with some old timey music playing.
Howard took a call from Ralph who said that Howard said he doesn't want a driver that's famous but then he makes him more famous by talking about him. Howard said it's fascinating to him. Ralph said it is fascinating. Howard said Ronnie bills himself as a ''Star of Satellite Radio'' in an appearance he's doing. Ronnie said he didn't come up with it. He retweeted it according to Jason though. Ronnie said he didn't write it. He said the people at the place they're going to be wrote it.
Ralph asked why Ronnie why he's not on Instagram instead. Ronnie said he doesn't want to be on there. Ronnie said he's only on Twitter. He said he's not on Facebook but someone took his name and made an account. Brent made another comment so Ronnie said he used to get shit blown in his face. Brent said he was the one putting the shit in the fan. Brent said Ronnie is one of the most fascinating people on the planet.
Ronnie said he has fun doing it. Robin asked what's fun about it and what the thrill is. Ronnie said he puts up other shit. He said Natalie Maines is all over with the Flat Ronnie. He said he retweets that shit too. He said it's every time she does a concert. He said he retweets Jillian Barberie's shit too. He said he sent her a comment about giving her some vitamins and put the devil horns. He said she loved it and retweeted it.
Brent said the other thing that's fascinating that Ronnie is proud of being compared to Lenny Dykstra. He said the rest of them there would be insulted. Ronnie asked when they're going to do the show together. He said he knows the guy is off his rocker but it would be a great radio show.
Howard asked if Jillian and Natalie like him because he only shows vagina from behind. Howard said maybe he should put some big, gaping holes on there. Howard said Natalie sent him some Flat Ronnie pictures. Howard said that whole thing was a goof. Ronnie asked if he should be upset.
Howard said Jon Hein hates ''Hit 'em with the Hein'' so much. He said Jim Lee put it on the cover of a Suicide Squad comic book. Howard said Jon said he wouldn't hang that in his house. Howard said it's kind of normal to hate something like that. He said Ronnie embraces this stuff. Howard said he's an older guy who is talking about red cunt and other weird stuff. He said he's like Bad Grandpa. Howard said he's into cock rings too.
Ronnie said he got some cool cock rings in the mail. Brent said he was so excited about it. He was showing them to everyone. Howard asked if he watches Ronnie all day. Brent said he's always asking people ''What's your fucking problem'' and saying fuck you to them. Howard said Ronnie doesn't get it. Howard said he told him to stop it. Ronnie said he's being a real asshole now. He said he doesn't do it when guests are there. Howard said Ronnie is the security guy. Howard asked him to stop that. Ronnie said he'll stop talking to everyone if that's what he wants.
Howard said he's not punishing him. He said that's perfect. Ronnie said he won't talk to Brent anymore. Howard asked why he has to talk like that to people. Howard said maybe talk politely. Howard said he doesn't need a comic for security. Robin said they have seen each other so much that there's nothing left to say. She said he started humming while she was humming and he didn't even realize it.
Howard asked Ronnie if he ever saw the movie The Bodyguard. Ronnie said he did. Ronnie said he ended up fucking her. Howard said he did that because he wasn't busy posting cunt pictures. Howard said listen to him. He said he's making a point. Howard said the reason Kevin Costner was cool is because security guys should blend in. He said you shouldn't know they're there. Howard said people shouldn't know he has a security guy. Howard said Kevin Costner didn't say ''fuck you'' to anyone. Ronnie said he doesn't tweet during the show at all. Howard said he's going to remake The Bodyguard and Ronnie is going to be the Bodyguard where everything goes wrong. He said the girl falls in love with him but it'll be Tan Mom. Ralph said maybe Nicole Bass should be the woman. Howard said watch the movie and imitate that. Ronnie said he does watch it.
Howard said that in his version of the movie the woman gets shot and Ronnie is busy tweeting rear vagina pictures. Howard said he's going through those pictures and tweeting out the ones with just the right amount of vagina. Howard did his impression of Ronnie.
Howard asked what the story is on the cock ring. Ronnie said Doc Johnson sent them over. Howard asked what he has there. Ronnie showed Howard what he had. Ronnie said it's got two motors on it. Brent said he uses them too so he knows about this. Ronnie said Brent has whips and chains too. He said he's into S&M. Brent said it's been years since he did that. Ronnie said this is a 3 ring set. He said you can use two. Howard said if he did that with Beth she'd freak out and leave him. Ronnie said he has a rechargeable cock ring too. Howard said look at the size of that thing. Brent explained how you can bring it up to a woman and not shock them.
Howard said they can bring in Richard to try them on. Howard said they can see how they work. Ronnie showed something that looked like a shoe horn. Brent said he thinks you put it on and it massages your taint at the same time. Ronnie showed another thing that had a male and female oil kit. Ronnie said it was a wellness kit. Howard said he has a nice gift there. Ronnie said that was from Doc Johnson.
Richard came in and said Ronnie can wash the thing when he gets done with it. Ronnie said he can throw it out. Howard said he's got Ronnie's cock ring on the phone. He took the call from The Lump who joked about the cock ring thing.
Howard said Richard is putting the cock ring on. Howard said maybe Robin will put it on. Ronnie didn't know how to put it on. He said he should read the instructions. Richard said it has a USB thing where you plug it into your computer.
Howard asked if he's getting hard over there. Richard said that's the whole point of the thing. Ronnie said that's what they do. Gary said there are some buttons on the side. Howard said that's enough of this. Richard turned it on and said that's crazy. It was making a humming noise that they got on microphone. Howard said he can take it home if he wants to. Howard said he can take it home and stick it in his girl's hole. Richard had them stick the microphone back down there. It was still humming.
Howard had Sal come in because Richard needs him. He said he's turned on by the cock ring. Sal said he's going to pass on this one. Howard asked Sal to come in. Sal said please no. He didn't want to come in. Richard said Larry is going to get jealous. Sal said he's not going to touch that thing. He said it's disgusting. He said his dick looks like a red sausage. Richard said it feels cool and had Sal touch it. Sal did it and said it was wonderful. Richard wanted to press it against his ass cheek. Sal said no way to that. Sal said Richard looks so happy. Howard said Richard has a smile on his face like he's so happy. Gary said he looks like a slow adult because he's so happy. Howard asked him to just let him rub the tip on his ass cheek. Sal said he has 3 kids. Howard said through his jeans. Sal said he's going to pass. Richard did it and Sal let out a ''Oh!'' when he felt it. Sal ran out of the room. Howard said they need to take a break anyway.
Howard asked Richard if he has any theories on Ronnie. Richard said if you press the button again it pulses the cock ring. Howard asked if Gary can feel it. Gary said he has an idea of how it works. Howard said this is how a circle jerk starts.
Gary said he unfollowed Ronnie's retweets just so he doesn't have to see the naked pictures. He said that way you can still see the other weird stuff he posts. Howard said his whole point in bringing it up is that he's not sure what his game plan is. Howard said he understands he wants to see naked women but he's not sure why he retweets it.
Howard thanked Ralph for calling in. Ronnie thanked Nick for bringing this up. Ralph asked why Ronnie if he has a no vagina policy why did he post those pictures. Ronnie said they're ass pictures. Robin said he's saying that the ass is so great that it's unintentional that he had the vagina in there. Howard said this is the simplest thing.
Ralph was still on the phone so he asked if Memet worries about the husband. Memet said he felt bad doing it. He said she was in from out of town though. Ronnie said one day he'll get in trouble. He said he knows. He said if he's on the phone with her then the husband will find out. Memet said so what. Ronnie said he doesn't know who the guy is so he has no idea what he can do. Memet said maybe they have an arrangement.
Memet said they go to the hotel room and she was wearing a very sexy cocktail dress. She had very sexy panties on too. Memet said he was at the hotel bar and he was very nervous. He said he pretty much popped a rod immediately. Howard asked how big her boobs were. Memet said they were mid sized but they were very nice. He said she was fully shaved too.
Howard asked about meeting in the bar. Memet said he had a Jack and Coke. He said he thought that it might slow him down. He said he jerked off before going to see her too. Howard said he used to do that too. He said that it didn't help. Memet said same thing for him.
Howard asked if guys were hitting on her. Memet said the bar was kind of empty. He said they were messaging really filthy things to each other before they even met. He said they were exchanging sexy pictures and stuff. He said he doesn't send out dick pictures though. Ronnie asked if he sent pictures of himself to her. Memet said he did. He said they were tasteful sexy pictures. Ronnie was getting at the point that the husband will find them.
Memet said they met and they had to have small talk. He said it was tough because they had done this other stuff. He said she was way hotter than he expected. He said she's the kind of chick he'd marry if she wasn't married.
Memet said they went upstairs after the drinks. Howard asked if he told her that his dick isn't that big. Memet said ''What?'' He said he never lets a girl see him soft. He said it won't come out of his pants until he's chubbed up. Ralph asked who suggested they go up. Memet didn't get to answer. Howard asked to see a picture of the chick. Memet said he'll come off like an asshole if he does that. Howard said just show it to him. He said he showed it to everyone else there. Howard saw it and said ''Oh shit!'' he said she is fucking hot. Memet said she's even hotter in person.
Howard asked who she looks like. Ronnie took a look and said she looks like a porn star he knows. Brent said Kristen Stewart almost. Howard said he can't figure it out. Memet said maybe Jennifer Lawrence. Ralph said just put it up on HowardStern.com. Memet said no way.
Memet said he should be going to hell. He said he got up to the hotel room and there was a spread of cheese and crackers. He said he asked if she ordered it and she said her husband actually ordered it for her. He said that didn't stop him. He said the marathon sex after that was great. He said it went on all night. He said as soon as they got to the room they were going at it. He said this isn't the first time it's happened either. He said they were going at it 2 or 3 minutes into the room. He said he came really fast the first time. Howard said he came so hard that he came in his own face.
Memet said he didn't use a condom that night either. He said he couldn't find the hole according to Ronnie. Howard asked Memet if he went in bareback and pulled out. Memet said he did. Ronnie said he has to be careful doing it without a condom. Memet said he doesn't do that with just anyone. Howard asked if he does the sniff test down there. Memet said he knows he's coming off as a douche talking about all of this.
Howard asked how he came on his own face. Memet said he was really charged up and he was in the missionary position. He said he was going longer then he thought he would. He said he was going several minutes of hard and fast. Memet said he's coming off like such an asshole. He said he's finally getting laid though. Memet said he pulled out and was going to go on her stomach but he was so horned up that he looked down and it went straight into his eye instead of her stomach. He said it dripped down. He said she laughed at him but he wasn't laughing. Ronnie said it's like a hose. Memet said he ran to the bathroom sink to rinse it off.
Howard asked how long he waited to do it again. Memet said that it doesn't take him long to get going again. He came all of those times they had sex. Ralph said that's crazy. Howard said when he was 19 or so he dated a chick in Princeton and he came 5 times in one night. Ralph said he never did that. Howard said he started in the afternoon and went into the night. He said those were the good ol' days.
Howard asked Ronnie how many mistakes he's making. Ronnie said it's bad to do the communication on the phone. He said the thing is that if the husband has any suspicion then he's going to check the phone and it'll be a bad scene. He said she's going off on her own to New York and he might be following her. Howard asked if Memet is in love with her. Memet said he would be too. Memet said he's not going to talk about when he might see her again.
Brent asked if he needs things like this again to get off. Memet said he tries to meet normal girls and they want nothing to do with him.
Howard took a call from a manly sounding woman saying it was so hot when he came all over. It was Yucko the Clown doing the voice and honking his horn. Memet said that he's seen the woman's husband in pictures. Yucko said Memet posts model pictures on his Facebook and he and Eli Braden go on and post really dirty things. Memet said that's part of the reason he can't date normal girls. Howard asked why he lets the public in on his Facebook. Memet said he thought Yucko was a friend. He's not so sure now.
Memet said the more your wife is on Facebook and Twitter the dirtier the texts are to him in private. Howard asked if she puts down her husband at all. Memet said they didn't talk about that at all. He said that she mentioned that his dick was bigger than her husband's though. He said he felt bad for the husband.
Brent asked if he feels bad for the husband. Memet said no. He said put yourself in his shoes. He said if a hot woman like that came on to you then you'd do the same thing. Howard said he'd never do that. He said that's just not right. Ralph said this is so regular now and you never know who is going to be in the hotel room. Memet said that they went to her room. Ralph said you don't know who will be in the room though.
Brent said that you never know if a guy is going to be in the closet watching. Ralph said he thinks Brent has done that. Brent said he didn't though.
Memet said he's looking for a normal girl but she's not out there. The guys said he's not into that and he's looking for this kind of stuff. Memet said he doesn't know.
Memet said that he's got a warped view of marriage now. He said a lot of women reach out to him like this. Howard said he's got AIDS on the phone. AIDS said that he got Memet with that 7 times. Memet said he's fine. Robin asked if he got a blood test. Memet said the doctors know him by his first name now.
Ronnie asked what he's going to do if he got her pregnant. Memet said it can't happen. Ronnie said he can get her pregnant if he went in there without a condom. Memet said the chances are very slim. Howard said he has to have a talk with him about sex. Memet said he needs a condom that gives you some feeling. Ronnie told him to try a cock ring. Memet said that won't stop the pregnancy thing.
Howard said he was born by the pull out method. Memet said he might come off like a dick but think about what you'd do. He said he's thought about this woman a lot. Howard asked if he liked her personality. Memet said he did. Ralph asked what the craziest thing he did with her was. Memet said it wasn't anything too crazy. He said you don't do that when you're with someone for the first time. He said they had a nice bubble bath. Howard asked if that was after the third time. Memet said it was the 4th or 5th. Howard asked if she saw his dick soft. Memet said they were fucking in the bath so she didn't right away but she did eventually. He said that as long as she sees it hard first it's fine.
Howard said according to planned parenthood there's a 27 percent chance of getting pregnant with the pull out method. Howard said he's never even shot a load in his own face. Ronnie said he was probably already shooting out before he pulled out. Memet said he read about pre-cum and how the sperm in that is dead. Howard laughed. He said now he's being an asshole. Ralph said if he keeps that up he's going to knock someone up.
Howard asked if she was on birth control. Memet said he didn't ask. Robin said that's an asshole move. Howard said he really is the Gangster of Love. Howard said he has that tattoo that says that. Memet said it was sarcastic when he got it. Fred played the Steve Miller song. Howard said he has Memet's baby on the phone now. He took the call and let the baby say hello.
Memet said he knows people are going to hate him now. Howard said he's just worried about him. He said he's on his team. Memet said it's hard to turn things like this down. Howard said Ronnie saved him from the catfish thing that one time. He was going to take a bus up north to meet some woman who turned out to be a dude. Memet was going to a remote cabin to meet her. Howard said in his defense it was a very pretty dude. Howard said the picture was a dude. He thought he was going to get laid. Ronnie said he saw the picture of the girl who was so hot. He said that he could have gone up there and they may have never seen him again.
Ralph asked how he found out it was a guy. Memet said they looked up the pictures and they were 20 years old and all over the internet. Ralph said he's 29 and he should be smarter than that. Howard said he found out she wasn't a girl when the girl showed him his cock after he was finished.
Howard asked if he thinks that she'll leave her husband and he'll marry her. Memet said no way. He said that she has a family and she's still married. He said maybe in some way he's providing the one thing that's missing from the marriage. Robin said he's going to get all caught up in this if he keeps doing it. Howard said it's Memet's service. Howard said thank you for your service.
Ralph said he loves how he says he wants a regular relationship but he's involved with this. Memet said he goes on dates all the time but the girls don't like him. He said they don't call him back. Howard said he has to take it slow and go on dates. Howard said nice girls aren't going to fuck him on the first night. Howard said it might be two weeks. Howard said his thing is that he feels he has a bad personality and girls will bail. Memet said he does. He said he's too nice or a loser. Howard said he works on the Howard Stern Show. He's not a loser. Brent said everyone there likes the guy. He told Memet he has a good personality. Ronnie said he has desperate women who want to get laid. He said he'll never get anywhere other than maybe get killed.
Ralph asked how long ago this was. Memet said it was days. Howard said sometimes the heart wants what the heart wants. Ralph said he's making this into a thing. He said he's having a relationship with this woman. He said Memet is a mess. Memet said he's just playing it by ear. Robin said there is no way the woman is leaving her husband for him. Memet said she does fine on her own so she doesn't need the husband. Robin said she's not leaving her great lifestyle for Memet.
Howard took a call from a woman who said Memet has this whole aura about him and if he thinks he's helping the marriage he's putting himself down a hole. Memet said he's fine. The caller said she's been there and he has to change his whole image.
Howard took a call from the woman's husband who said he's helping the marriage so much they should send him off to help Sharon and Ozzy. Howard thanked him for the call.
Ralph said his point is that Memet is swimming in waters he shouldn't be. He doesn't have the experience to be dating women like this. Memet said he thinks she'd tell him different if he talked to her.
Howard took a call from a guy who said you'd have low self esteem too if you came in your own face. Howard took a call from Sour Shoes who was doing his George Takei voice. He asked him to come over there and break up his marriage too. Howard said George is in love with Memet. Howard thanked George for the call but George said he's Spoken Word George. He did a spoken word poem for Memet. Howard said that was a wonderful poem. George said he's in a pool of Bukakke and splashed some of it around.
Howard took a call from a guy who said Ronnie has to be gay. He said he's constantly obsessed with cock. He said he used to be just like him. Ronnie thanked him for the call. He said he's gay. Howard said Ronnie is open to everything. Ronnie said no. The caller said he knows Ronnie is gay based on the way he talks. Brent said he's sure Ronnie is into women. The caller said no way.
Howard asked if Memet is okay. Memet said he's just playing all of the stuff in his head that just went on. Howard said Ronnie was going to let Richard blow him for money. Ronnie said it was for the money. He said a blow job is a blow job. He said he'd just lay back an take the cash.
Howard said Memet just went into a funk. Memet said he knows people are going to think he's an asshole. Howard said everyone has done stuff like that. Memet said it's hard not to do these things. Ronnie said he's such a scumbag. Howard asked if he's going to cry. Memet said just put yourself in his shoes. He said you'd do it too.
Howard took a call from Shuli doing his Tan Mom voice. Tan Mom said her husband can jerk off in the corner while Memet fucks her. Howard said Memet will cum on his own face too. Howard let Tan Mom go after that.
Howard said they learned a lot this morning. Ralph said they learned that Memet is a marriage saver. Ralph asked if Richard still has the cock ring on. Howard said he's over in the corner with that. Howard said that girl was hard to resist so he'd have a hard time with that too. He told Memet to go wash his face. Howard let everyone go and went to break.
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Howard said he thought the show was a little preachy with the politics. Caitlyn said she had some plans for next season where she'd poke Lamar Odom's balloon knot. She had some other plans for the show that she told Howard about.
Howard said that was Caitlyn Jenner everyone. Caitlyn said she had to do Prostate Karaoke first. She started to sing and her voice went up when the probe went in. Howard let her go a short time later. She kept saying goodbye. Howard eventually got her off the phone.
Howard had Wendy on the phone and she was yelling about something. She hurt her foot or something. Howard got her on the line and she said she's just chilling having some wine coolers. Howard said she has no idea it's too early to be drinking. Wendy said she has two bottles. Howard asked if she's drunk. Wendy said she's playing with her titties too. Howard said he has a note about her drinking Seagram's Peach Wine Coolers. Howard said that's not a good idea. Wendy said she's in her bedroom. Howard asked how that's legal for her to drink.
Howard asked Wendy if it's wrong to have sex with a married person. Wendy said no. She said it's okay. Howard asked why she's mad at Gary. Wendy said she heard him talking about how he hates her and she didn't like what Jon Hein was asking him.
Howard said Wendy is drinking and it's not good. Gary said they went back and listened to the Wrap Up Show and found nothing. Gary said he's not going to send her the $500. Robin asked if she's sticking with that amount. Wendy said she is. Gary said he and Wendy had a good 5 minute conversation and he really liked her. He said now this. He said he was told by Shuli that she was at a flea market asking for money and a guy gave her $5 and she pulled out a wad of money and added that money to it.
Howard asked if Wendy thinks she is smarter than High Pitch Erik. Wendy said she does. She said he's a moron but she could beat him. She said she's smarter than him. Wendy said he made her friend Lisa mad and now she wants her to punch Erik out for her.
Howard said Wendy had a 61 on the IQ test and Erik had a 66. Howard said that's pretty good. Gary asked if she knows what 5 plus 5 is. Wendy said 10. Howard asked her to spell Robin. Wendy spelled it correctly. Howard said she might be able to beat him. Howard asked her to name 3 states. She was able to do that with New York, New Jersey and Florida. She said she had a big shit in her pants earlier. Howard said she's doing that because she's kind of out of it an lazy. She said if the power goes out there she will run into the wall looking for her flashlight.
Howard asked if she graduated high school. Wendy said she did and she's the only one in her family to graduate. That med Benjy laugh. Howard said he has to go. He let Wendy go. He said everyone loves Wendy the Slow Adult. Howard said even her phone is retarded.
Howard took a call from Jim from Raleigh who asked if Howard has been on the air longer than any other broadcaster. Howard said he's sure there are other guys who have been on longer. Howard said Imus has been on longer. Howard said he might be the most successful radio broadcaster. Howard said he'll Google his name once in a while and ask the mirror on the wall if he's the most successful radio guy of all time. Howard said he'll do that on Google. He said they say that Rush Limbaugh is the most successful but that's just not true. Howard said he can't come to satellite and bring the kind of numbers that they did. Howard said morning radio is the most competitive and he was arguing with Google about this. He said the paper he was in was supported by terrestrial radio. Howard said Rush could never do what he did. Howard said he'd have some subscribers but not a lot. Jim said Rush is not funny at all. Howard said this was in Talkers magazine. He said the article is horse shit.
Jim said Rush just followed what Howard did. Howard said the guy has some success. He said he can't take that away from him but he's not the most successful. Howard let Jim go after that. Then he did a live commercial read.
Howard took a call from Sour Shoes who was doing his Gary impression. He had Gary sleeping and dreaming about Jon Hein, shrimp and other things. Sour did his impression with Gary snorting and clearing his throat. Howard told him to go back to work and produce the show.
Robin read a story about Truman Capote's ashes being up for sale. Robin said that they're going up on auction in September. Robin said he left the ashes to a friend and Johnny Carson's wife. They were stolen and recovered twice. Robin said after Carson died it was decided that they'd put them up for sale. Howard said maybe just bury them somewhere. Robin said she's fine with her's just being put in a dumpster.
Robin read about a man who raped a woman and left his wallet at the scene of the crime. Robin said the woman was abducted while on the phone. Robin said the woman was forced behind a bush on the lawn and was forced to have sex. Robin said they found the man's wallet nearby.
Howard played a clip from a FOX channel where they gave a ''Hit 'em with the Hein'' during a broadcast. Howard said it's an epidemic. Howard said that was some transition. Howard said he didn't know the audience would catch on like that. Howard played another ''Hit 'em with the Hein'' from a news report. Howard also played a ''Hit 'em with the Hein'' song parody. He did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about a study that was done that found work happiness can have a large impact on physical and mental health later on in life. Howard said he worked at an ad agency for a week and he looked green. Howard said it's the worst going to a job you hate.
Robin read a story about a former FOX news co-host, Andrea Tantaros, who is claiming that behind the scenes they act like a sex obsessed cult at the network. Robin read some details about this case. Howard said the whole world is nuts. He said he used to watch that Andrea Tantaros on the news all the time. He said he wondered what happened to her. Howard said he heard some stuff about what went on over there and went over some of that stuff. Howard talked about how he used to like Bob Grant because he was a good broadcaster. He said he didn't agree with the guy all the time but he was a good broadcaster. He said it's the same thing with FOX News. Howard said Ronnie could take over for Roger Ailes over there at FOX News. That led to Fred doing his creepy Ronnie voice talking to the women about icing their nipples and things like that.
Robin read a story about Larry King's wife having an affair. Robin said she was thinking she might be the woman Memet was with but she's older than that woman. Robin said the National Enquirer is claiming that Larry's wife was cheating. Robin said she allegedly texted her boy toy a picture of herself exposing a breast. Robin read more details about that and the Enquirer is sticking by their story that it went on.
Robin read a story about how the government is going to be buying up surplus cheese to use for food banks and charities. Howard said welfare cheese was the biggest insult when he was growing up. He said people used it as a rank out.
Howard took a call from Tan Mom who said she was just in Los Angeles filming a movie. Howard asked what movie it was. Tan Mom said she was in Animal House. Robin asked if they're making that again. Tan Mom said yes. She said she plays Babs in the movie. Benjy wondered if it was real or a porn. Tan Mom said that they're making it for the older remake of the movie. She said it's hysterical. She said it's the cast as if they were older. She said it's a sequel. Howard asked if she's nude in it. Tan Mom said she's not but she's doing something in the future that will be funny as hell. Howard asked if she has any dialog that can tease the audience. Tan Mom said she walks in and one of the guys pulls her down and picks up her shirt and starts pouring shots on her. She said then the whole crew comes out. She said guys do shots off of her. Howard asked when it's coming out. Tan Mom said they said it will be toward the holidays. Howard said now he has a reason to live. Howard asked who directed it. Tan Mom said somebody took over the movie. She said the other guy gets a part of it. She said he's the one who came out with it.
Howard said Benjy can't find any information about it. Tan Mom said it's not out yet. Howard said he's going to go do the news now so thank you for the call. He asked if she has any scenes with John Belushi. Tan Mom said nothing. Howard let her go after that. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about how Epi-pens have gone up in price by 400 percent. Robin said they have been more affordable in the past. Robin said people weren't strapped when they needed one. Robin said the government is asking why the prices have been boosted from $57 in 2007 to $500 now. Robin said that it could put a crimp in someone being able to save their own life.
Robin read about the Zika virus popping up more in Florida. Robin said it's spread to the Tampa area. Robin said the person infected there did not travel to Miami or anywhere else. Howard said we should be able to eradicate this. He said this is America. He told Obama to make it happen. Howard wondered if we all stayed inside for 3 weeks if they could stop it. Robin said they don't just bite people. They bite deer and things like that. Howard said they need Seal Team 6 to come in and take care of it. Robin said just wear repellant and it'll work. Robin said that stuff works. Howard didn't think it did. Robin said she has to wear it because she gets bitten a lot if she doesn't cover up. Robin said she asked Captain Dennis if the traps are working. She said he told her they do.
Robin had some audio of President Obama talking about the flooding in Louisiana. Robin said he toured parts of Baton Rouge yesterday. Robin said the floods killed more than a dozen people.
Robin read a story about Donald Trump and how he's thinking about changing his immigration policy. Robin had some audio of Trump talking about how the laws have to be followed with any immigration policy. Robin read about how Trump is talking about Hillary Clinton and her email scandal. She had some more clips for Howard to play. Robin had some Tim Kaine and Joe Biden clips to play as well.
Robin read a story about Demi Lovato being accused of lifting from someone else's work. Robin said she was called out by a band called Sleigh Bells. Robin said that band has turned it over to the courts. Robin had some audio of the two songs. Howard said he wouldn't rip off either of the bands. He played both and said he loves when people fight over a shitty song. Howard said Richard's penis is on bongos in that. Howard said he hears a similarity and they're both shitty. Howard said he might dig the Sleigh Bells version more.
Robin read a story about how parents should explain to their kid's teachers that they have autism. Robin had a clip of a guy talking about how to do that. Howard said his parents used to meet with teachers to tell them he was a moron.
Robin read a story about an earthquake that happened in Italy that killed at least 4 people and leveled buildings. Robin said the buildings collapsed on top of people. Howard said that figures. He said that's the one country he thought about going to with Beth. Howard said now that won't happen. Robin said they say some of the towns just don't exist anymore.
Robin read about the TV show Power that 50 Cent is in. Robin had some audio of him talking about a sex scene he did. He was on Jimmy Kimmel's show talking about how he showed full frontal. Robin said he looked pretty big in that scene. Robin wrapped up and Howard ended the show around 11:05am.
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Here's what they replayed today:
Today's replays were over around 11:10am.
Here's what they played on today's replay show:
Today's replays were over around 11:05am.