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Howard started off the show saying he was going to take some phone calls. He said he had a lot to get to today as always. He was about to take the calls but he said he was reading about Robin in the paper over the weekend. She was out with her friends over the weekend and it made the news. He read the story about her and her pals picking a charity to donate to. She and her friends have a name for themselves. They call themselves ''Girls Night Out.''
Howard said that he goes out with people but they didn't name their group. Jason is in that group of girls according to the note on his screen. Robin said that he is the one male member of the group.
Howard said that this is the greatest thing he's ever heard, giving themselves a name like Girls Night Out. Robin said there are 5 girls in the group and they considered a bunch of names. Howard said that Leonardo Dicaprio is the only other guy who named his group. They were called the Pussy Posse.
Howard said that most groups don't name themselves, they're named by other people. Robin said that they were planning on raising money for these charities and someone advised them that they needed a name. Robin said that the other 5 girls in the group are her friends Sheila, Susan, Anne Marie and Lisa. Not Lisa G. Howard said he was trying to let this all sink in so he went through all of the girls one by one.
Howard asked if they're going to expand this group. Robin said that they may because they already have another woman who wants to join. That's Dominic Barbara's wife Leslie. She wants to be part of that group. Howard said she really needs a group like that being married to Dominic. He said that Dominic was in his group for a while and he can just imagine that she needs a group of her own.
Artie seemed to find it very funny that Jason was in that group. Jason came in a short time later and said that he didn't know that it was called the Girls Night Out when he joined the group. He said the great thing about the group is that they'd spend a whole night trying to come up with the name. Artie told Jason that he's not sure that he wants to go to his bachelor party knowing that he's in this group. Jason said that the girls really went nuts when they heard the Girls Night Out name so they knew that was a winner.
Gary came in and said that Robin has told them to get groups of 30 people together on a list. Howard said that he responded to that but Robin claims she never got it. He said that he doesn't know 30 people other than the people that she knows. Gary said that the girls get together he hears from Jason what's going on and he said that he doesn't know anybody either. Jason gave Jason some names and addresses and it turned into a job for him.
Howard said that he found out that he was going to be out of town for this event that she's throwing. He said that she's becoming one of those friends that's going to start hitting him up for stuff. He said that they're probably going to end up selling cookies to him or something. Artie said that he has dead beats that just ask him for money, they don't even do a charity event.
Gary said that he contacted some people like Jimmy Kimmel to help out with the charity to give stuff away. Jason doesn't know all that many people so that's what he had to do for him.
Robin said that she wants them to just think about the people they're going to be saving with the donations to the charity. Howard said that he doesn't think about those people that she mentioned at all.
Howard read more of the article about the charity that she's going to be donating to. They're going to be hosting an evening at the Rainbow Room with a concert pianist, Simone Dinnerstein, as a special guest. They're going to have Simone Dinnerstein's father's art there too.
Howard asked Jason for the list of the names that Robin rejected that night they picked the name for the group. Robin said that they were ''Tre Sheik'' for a little while.
Johnny Fratto called in and said that he'd like to donate a motorcycle to the charity. He said that this is the second one that he's done for the show and he's used to it now. He asked about the charity that it's for and Robin said that it's for something called Healing Bridges. Robin thanked him for the donation and she'd get back to him about that. Then she said that Gary would get back to him about it.
Howard told Robin that she should agree to show her titties to one of their listeners and someone would probably give so much that she'd never have to raise money for Africa again. Howard said that he might even be the high bidder with that. He said that she has to agree to do it for like a minute.
Howard asked Fred, as Jim Florentine, if he was okay with that. He said he'd be fine with it. He said that he's also part of Girls Night Out and tucks his penis between his legs when he goes out with them.
When Howard was reading the name Simone earlier Robin told him that it was pronounced Simona so they were goofing around with that a little bit. That led to Howard and the guys talking about some other people who give people a hard time about the pronunciation of their names.
Robin said that Girls Night Out should start a band and branch out. He said that they could be like the Spice Girls or the Pussy Cat Girls and do so many different things.
Howard said that Robin could never be married with such a full plate all the time. She has so many things going on in her life that she could never settle down.
Howard said that he's going to be out of town when this event is going on and he told her that in the note he sent to her. He said he had no idea that she didn't get his note. He said he knows he sent it through. He told her that he admires her verve for life though.
Howard took a phone call from a guy who said that this was the gayest thing he's ever heard in his life. He said that it sounds a little elitist to him. He said that they should put up Jason's penis for the charity since it sounds like he'll never need that again.
Howard wondered if Leslie Barbara is going to get invited out to the night's out with the girls. Robin said that she would be invited out to the weekends with the other girls. Robin said that they get a masseuse to come and they just hang out and have fun. Artie said his sister has been to those things and Robin is very generous with that stuff. Robin said that they all chip into that kind of thing.
Howard asked Robin if they have a slogan yet. She said that she's working on something and thinking that it might be ''Women here helping women there.'' She said that the ''there'' is wherever they're helping people of course.
Robin said that they'll eventually have people apply to be the charity that they donate too. They'll do this yearly. Howard said that the girls have a leader in Robin obviously. He said that this was all news to him and he had no idea that they had named the group. He wondered what one of Jason's names was all about when he said that he had mentioned ''The Caped Crusaders'' earlier. Artie was laughing his ass off thinking about Jason being in that group.
They gave Billy the number 60 since he just turned 60. Howard said that he sees the argument that it belittles the game. He said that it's not fun, it's not funny for that pitcher on the Pittsburgh Pirates who had to pitch to the guy.
Howard said that Billy had a good swing and he thinks that he came close to hitting a single when he did make some contact. He said that he fouled the ball off but that was it. Howard said that the guy had 3 balls and 2 strikes and he shouldn't have swung at the last one because he probably would have walked. Robin said that he should have been struck out and just taken out of the game. She thought it was ridiculous that he was playing at all. Artie said that he thinks he can get a piece of the ball just like Billy did.
Another caller asked Robin when she's going to go out and start fighting crime. Robin said that's what she has next on her list of things to do.
Jason said that he knew that they were going to be doing that the night they went out so he came prepared. Howard told him to bring in the list so he can hear some of the other names.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that he had a name for the group. He said ''Chicks with no dicks.'' They already have their name picked out though.
Howard said that the guys on the Wrap Up Show were talking about whether or not he's gay. They ended up talking about how upset some of the guys would be if they ever found out he was gay. Artie and his friends used to talk about that when they were younger. They had Howard on the list of guys they'd be really upset about if they came out as being gay.
Howard said that a guy who comes out with Butt Bongo Fiesta isn't gay. He said he just wanted to get his hands on some women's asses for that.
Howard took another call from a guy who said that Robin needs to come up with some theme music and suggested Hannah Montana's song ''Girls Night Out.'' He wanted his daughter to be part of the group. He also said that his wife should be part of it if he can come up with some stuff to donate. The caller also called the group ''GNO'' so they started to call Robin's group GNO. Howard said that Robin's eyes lit up when she heard that GNO thing.
Howard and Artie were goofing around with the GNO name a little bit. Fred dug up the Hannah Montana song on the web and played it for them. It was just coming out in one channel so Howard had to have Fred pull a better copy.
Howard said he wasn't able to find the article but he knows he read something about it. He said that he knows that there are some shenanigans going on with this merger. He knows that it's all about guys getting paid off somewhere.
Jason came in and said that Kevin Martin is being investigated for being in Verizon's back pocket. Howard said that would really suck if that turns out to be true. He found the article about him and read through it. He said that they're investigating him for this Verizon deal and he said that this shouldn't be all about money. He said he'd like these people to just do their job.
The guys talked about some of the other mergers that have been approved since this satellite merger was announced. The government lets those go through in 100 days while this has been dragging on for 400 days. Howard said that this merger has no comparison to the satellite TV merger because they're really not the same type of thing.
Artie said that this proves that Howard is an A-list celebrity because they wouldn't be holding it up like this if he wasn't involved.
Howard played the Hannah Montana song that they tried to play earlier. This time it was coming out of both channels. Artie said that it sucked.
Howard played the song and pretended to be Robin picking up the phone at the organization while they had that playing on hold. He told Robin that it's nice to know that she has a good heart in there. He pretended to be Bill Clinton calling in to bid on getting to see Robin's tits.
Howard took another phone call from a guy who brought up the Mark the Bagger show that's on tonight at 7pm on Howard 101. Howard got in a plug for that and said that they're going to be celebrating St. Patrick's day tonight Howard said his dog's birthday is today. He said that Bulldogs don't live all that long and she's pretty old. He said that they average 8 years but some will live to 13.
Howard said that bulldogs have become very popular pets and people really don't know how much work it is to have one. He said that you should think twice before having an English bulldog. The caller asked if they brush Bianca's teeth. Howard said that Beth does that every day. He said that she was going to do that on The Today Show one week but they ran out of time. He said that it's really the cutest thing to see her doing it. Artie said that it sounds like the dog is cleaner than Richard Christy is. Howard said she absolutely is.
The caller that Howard had on the line was talking about how horrible it is being a landscaper. He mentioned plowing snow and stuff so that led to Artie and Howard talking about how little snow they got this season. Howard said that he hopes that they don't get anymore and that they have been lucky so far.
Howard took another call from a guy who called Robin ''Oprah Quivers'' since she seems to be kind of like Oprah with the charity stuff.
Howard said that he had to defend Billy Crystal playing that Yankee game because he actually found it kind of interesting to watch him. He said that he ended up watching more of that game than he'd usually watch and it gave him a new appreciation for the game. He said that those guys who play are really at a level that's amazing. Robin said that she still thinks it was stupid that they let Billy play. Artie said that the different levels of the game make it impressive to watch the pros play.
Howard said that he appreciates this guy doing that for him because he's been actively talking to people trying to support her. He said that she may have no clue about that and he likes that someone is telling her about it. He said that he reaches out to a lot of people, especially men, who he may be able to influence. He said he'd like to be recognized for doing his part there.
Howard said that he wanted to talk about this latest controversy about Barack Obama. The caller had some comments about that too but Howard told him to wait for him to do his thing. He ended up hanging up on the guy after he hit a button on his phone.
Howard went on to talk about this Barack Obama controversy where they have tapes of this preacher that Barack has been going to for over 20 years. The pastor there is this guy who was recorded saying some stuff that upset some people. He said that he was giving the benefit of the doubt when he watched the tapes but then he realized that the guy is just insane. He was saying ''God damn America'' and stuff like that after 9/11. He said he sounds like a raving lunatic to him.
Howard said that Barack was asked about this a long time ago and he claims he wasn't there when he made those statements and that he would have voiced his displeasure if he had. Howard said that if you're part of a church like that, you know what's going on there. He said that he should have known that the guy was a raving lunatic.
Howard said that this church is hateful and horrible and he's sending his family there. He said that maybe he's not making the greatest decisions with that. He said that he has to agree with that guy on some level if he's going to the church.
Howard said that once the tapes came out with this pastor yelling and screaming, then Barack came out and said that maybe they're kind of bad. He still hasn't condemned this guy. Howard said that's enough for him and he's not going with Obama.
Howard played some of the tape of this Pastor Jeremiah Wright going off on the Rich white people in this country and how they're running it. He said a bunch of stuff about the government lying about the AIDS virus and how they're keeping the cure from them as a way of committing genocide in the black community. There were a bunch of clips of him saying some outrageous things like that.
Howard said that Barack is now bullshitting everyone by saying he didn't know what this guy was up to. Robin said that this is the game that politicians play with people. He said that if you stand next to someone stupid like that, they'll eventually splash a little something on you. He said that Barack had to have raised an eyebrow at something that this guy said during his sermons. She said she doesn't know what all of that stuff had to do with a Sunday service anyway.
Howard said that this kind of thing should end a political career. He said that he can't be given a pass on something like that. Howard said that some people are saying that Hillary shouldn't use this stuff against Obama but he thinks that she should. Artie said that this stuff is insane and he can't imagine what the guy is thinking going to someone like that.
The guys talked about how Barack is best friends with that Pastor and he's even named him to some committees and things like that. Right now the guy is out of the country so they can't get any comments from him about what's been going on lately. Howard said that Hillary doesn't even need to use this stuff in her ads because the tapes are out there and the media outlets are playing them.
Artie said that he and his bookie aren't speaking right now. He said that he and Dana are closer than him and this old friend of his. He said that his wife was all upset with him about some stuff he said on the air about what was going on there. He said that it was a stupid conversation and he just hung up on his wife. He said that they had been friends for a really long time too.
Artie said that he has had a couple of experiences like this and he just can't do anything about it. He said that it's illegal to use a bookie like that and he can't go to the cops to complain about not getting paid and it sucks. Howard had to go to break a short time later.
Mark the Bagger and Jimmy Pop both came in. Howard said that Mark was upset with the show and that's what kept him off for so long. Howard said that he missed Mark and he apparently got upset about the gay stuff they were talking to him about. He had some audio of Mark leaving a message for Jimmy on his answering machine. In the message he was going off on Howard and saying that he wasn't sure if he was going to make it through the end of the year and he was done with Howard Stern after that appearance he made. He said he had lost his mother in the message.
Jimmy told Howard that he wasn't sure what he meant when he said that he'd lost his mother. Mark said that his mother wasn't happy with what he was saying about the gay stuff. The mayor of his town was upset with that stuff too. Howard told Mark that if he had known that stuff, he would have gone to them and explained what had happened on the show.
Mark said that he had just made one mistake, of blowing a guy in a truck one time, and no one should hold that against him.
Jimmy said that Mark is part of the fire company but they don't let him have anything to do with the fires. He said that someone told him that without Howard he wouldn't be doing anything but pushing carts. He wants to go on and do other things. He had a statement to read too so Howard had him do that.
Mark read his statement where he thanked Howard for letting him come back and said he wanted to talk about his movie and DVD. Mark had some gifts for them too but Jimmy told them not to touch anything that Mark has touched.
Jimmy said that the last time they were there they were there with Mary Carey. He wondered if Howard is going to have her back on the show if she's sober. Howard said they probably won't. Jimmy said that Mark was trying to hit on Mary when she was there. Mark said he didn't get anything off of her though.
Howard asked Mark if he's still bagging groceries. He said ''yes'' over and over to the questions he was being asked. He said he's getting laid and has a girlfriend. He said that his friends hooked him up with this girl and he took her out to dinner and a bar. He said that they got drunk and went back to his place and one thing led to another. He said that she was from came and he ended up sticking a wooden spoon up her. Howard asked why he would do that. Mark didn't know.
Mark said that the spoon went up her ass and he's not sure what happened because he was so drunk that night. He said that they work together and they had to break up because of that. Mark said that she didn't ask for a spoon up her ass, he just did it.
Jimmy asked what Mark did with the spoon after he did that. He said he threw it away and his mother didn't even notice. He said that his mom was at work when he did that. Howard asked about the spoon and if he did that while he was banging her from behind. He said ''yes'' to that. Howard said that you'd think that if you don't get laid that often you wouldn't think about sticking a spoon in someone's ass.
Mark said that about a month ago he went to a strip joint and met a hot black chick. He said he didn't have sex with her and didn't even get a lap dance because he didn't have money.
Jimmy said that Mark goes to concerts of these cover bands in the area that he lives but he doesn't face the bands. It turns out that he likes to sniff the girls that are there. He likes to sniff them and remember the smells for later when he wants to jerk off.
Howard asked Mark if he has been with any men since the last time he was on. He said he hadn't. Jimmy said that he did jerk off in front of everyone at a New Year's Eve party though. He was at his agent's party when he did that. Howard found out that Mark pays his agent 50 percent of what he makes. Jimmy said that he found out that Mark's mother was taking some of his money too and spending it on herself. He said that they had to straighten that out so that Mark would be able to keep some of the money for himself.
Jimmy was telling the guys about Mark's ID which is actually a non-driver's license. He has to have an ID but it's a non-driver's license.
Howard had some questions for Mark and asked him things like...
Howard gave Mark a plug for his show that's on tonight. He said he heard that Mark wanted to get on Regis and Kelly after he was on his show but he never got the calls. Mark said he did want to do that but he never got the call from them.
Howard asked Mark about having sex with this woman with the wooden spoon. He said that Mark has a big penis so he wondered if the girl had a problem accommodating it. Mark said she didn't have a problem. He said that he did it both ways that night, with and without a condom. He did it with the condom and then did it without it. Mark didn't know why he did that.
Jimmy asked how big the girl was. He said that she might have been 300 pounds but she wasn't fat. Howard said that he's trying to understand the spoon thing. He asked why he took off his rubber and how long the session lasted. Mark said that he can hold out for maybe 10 seconds. He said that it was probably 5 seconds with the condom on and 5 with it off.
Howard asked how big the load was. Mark said he dropped his load on her chest. Howard told him that was very romantic. He asked more about what position he was in and how the spoon came into play. Mark said he just told her that he was going to go get the spoon and she just stayed there. Mark said that was the last time he got laid too. He hasn't had anything since last summer.
Jimmy said that Mark got this spam e-mail where they offer Russian brides and he was about to pay for one. Mark said that wasn't true. He said that he does have some friends in other countries. He said that he has a Myspace account that he talks to people through. That's at Myspace.com/markthebagger
Howard said that maybe Mark would be better off getting a Russian bride. Mark said he's not interested in that. Howard told him that he'd be able to have sex with them if he did that. He'd just be giving them citizenship.
Mark got in a plug for his movie ''Ming Hags'' that he did with Bam Margera. mark said that Bam went to his agent and asked him to be part of this movie and he plays a high school drop out. He said he has some lines in the movie so Howard asked him to do some of the lines. He did some of that for them and Howard saw that he's also in negotiations to do some voice overs for some Warner Brothers cartoons. Jimmy said that it's true and it's probably the third sign of the apocalypse. He said that's another Bam Margera deal.
Howard said that it seems like things are going well for him. Artie asked him if his agent would represent him too. Mark said that his agent is all his and he doesn't represent anyone else.
Mark also has a DVD out and you can find out more about that at BaggerTheMovie.com or Myspace.com/baggerthemovie.
Howard asked about the New Year's Eve party where Mark took off his pants. Jimmy said that they were doing some stuff there that Artie has partaken in sometime in the past. Jimmy said that he took it out and stroked it a few times and then put it away.
Howard said that he saw Jimmy doing something kind of gay in a picture. He was taking a load in his hand. Jimmy said that things haven't been so good in the music industry lately and they're doing some other stuff in their concerts. He said that people are being fired from record companies left and right. Jimmy said that he doesn't want to do promos on TRL anymore so they were asked to do something where they'd do a live soundtrack for a porno. He said that it seemed like an interesting idea so they did that and he took the load on his hand, combed his hair with it and then went to TRL over in Belgium and shook the Back Street Boys' hands with a load on his hand and in his hair.
Howard had someone on the phone claiming to be the real Mark the Bagger. He picked up and it was the guys in the back playing clips of Mark on the show in the past. Mark knew that it was his voice being played. He said that he didn't know who it really was when Howard asked him if he did.
Howard heard that Mark was trying to date some women at a restaurant but he thinks that she's a lesbian because she doesn't want him. Mark said that they're just friends.
Howard gave Mark another plug for his radio show that's on tonight. Robin asked what he has planned. Mark said he has no idea. Jimmy said that's just like the Miserable Men show. Mark said that he had some things to talk about and he went on to talk about what he thought about the Billy Crystal thing and how they could have let him play in the outfield instead of making him the designated hitter the way they did. Artie said that he actually agrees with his first point.
Jimmy said that he's going to be talking to Mark about a bunch of stuff tonight and he's going to try and keep the show moving. Howard asked Mark if he's going to jerk off if things start moving slowly. Mark said a quick ''No'' to that. Jimmy asked Mark if he would jerk off with his spit on his cock. Mark said no to that as well and said that he's into women.
Mark talked about some stuff that he got in trouble for at work one day. He was trying to show off to one of the girls by saying he was in the produce department even though he was still a bagger. He got in trouble with his boss over that.
The guys asked Mark about how many hours he works a week. He said he gets in about 30 a week. He's not the head bagger. He has a friend that works there and has been there longer than him. He said that he makes about $8.45 an hour.
Mark talked about some of the sports that he follows and mentioned some of the names of the teams that he's a fan of. He said that he'll be talking about that stuff on his show tonight. He said that he won't be talking about the gay stuff he's done in the past though. He said that he's not even sure if he wants to talk about the chick whose ass he shoved the spoon in.
Mark asked Howard about this guy that he's endorsing for President. Howard said that it's Hillary but Mark thought it was Ron Paul. Howard said that he liked some of what Ron Paul had to say but he's not endorsing him. He said that he's behind Hillary.
Howard said that it sounds like they're going to have a great show tonight. He gave them some more plugs for that and for the web sites that he had mentioned earlier. Jimmy also has a show of his own on channel 33 tonight. He said that he's going to go see one of Artie's shows soon. He did that because he didn't want to do any plugs of his own today.
Howard asked Mark about his moustache and why he keeps it. Mark said that he just likes it. Howard said that it seems to be groomed very nicely. He asked if his keeps his pubes groomed nicely too. Mark said that he doesn't.
Mark talked about this woman that he really likes and how he's talked to her about getting married and stuff. He said that she has an 11 year old that he adores. Artie told him to stay away from that kid. Howard wrapped up with Mark a short time later and went to break.
Howard came back after that and brought up the Elliot Spitzer thing. He said that SIRIUS actually has a channel based on that whole controversy. He said that they have Jason Itzler, who was in last week, coming back in this morning to talk about this chick, Ashley Alexandra Dupré, that was the whore that Spitzer was going to.
Jason said that he actually got Ashley started in the business. He said that he did that about 3 years ago when she was around 19. Jason said that the funny thing is that she was working for him when he got busted for his prostitution ring by Elliot Spitzer. He said that if he had given up some of the women that worked for him, she could have been busted by him too.
Jason was saying that he doesn't call these girls whores, he calls them escorts. Howard said they heard his story last week about this Natalia woman that he was dating back when he was busted. He said that he met her through a famous photographer, Peter Beard, and he figured that Howard must know who he is. Howard wasn't sure who he was though.
Jason said that he got to know this Natalia back then. He said that she was still working back so Howard wanted to know if he wanted her to stop. He said that she was making so much that he wouldn't be able to stop her. Howard asked Jason how he met this Ashley chick. He said that he was at a hotel and this gorgeous girl working there came up to him and asked him if she could get him a drink. He said that Ashley was that gorgeous girl but he didn't think that she was a 10 at that point.
Howard said that this girl is good looking but he doesn't think that she's a 10 either. Jason said that she needs a nose job and she's a little too short. He said that she becomes like a 14 at one point in this story. He said that he was going to hold back on that unless Howard wanted to hear it. Howard told him to just spill it.
Jason said that he introduced this Natalia chick and they ended up doing the escort thing together a couple of times. Natalia came back and told him that she had seen Ashley's vagina and it was the most beautiful vagina on the planet. He said that he didn't get to see it for about a week or two but then he asked to see it. He never did. He said he's not sure about what it is that makes it so perfect though.
Artie said that he'd assume that it means there are no beef curtains and it's in proportion and just the right amount of hair and that it's just a little slit that you'd want to slide into. Artie asked if there were any pictures of it out there. No one knew of any.
Howard asked Jason how he got Ashley to become an escort. He said that she was his type but he didn't plan on getting her into the business. He said that Natalia was making a ton of money doing it and she talked Ashley into doing it as well. He said that Natalia was making somewhere around 2 million a year.
Jason said that Ashley was better looking than Natalia but Natalia was the top earner for his business. He said that Natalia was very good at what she did but Ashley eventually came in and did very good. He said that the girls loved their jobs and it showed.
Jason told the guys that some of the girls would have appointments that were close together and they would just use baby wipes to clean up. they wouldn't shower before going to the next guy. Artie was grossed out by that.
Jason talked about another girl he had working for him and what they did to make the big money. He said that if a guy asked for anal, they'd charge double. He said that he did that in the beginning of the business but he relaxed that later on. He said that he felt he was crossing the line with that kind of stuff. He said that he really didn't think it was right to change the price in the middle of a transaction.
Howard asked Jason more about this Ashley chick and how she figured out what he did for a living. He gave her his card and hoped that she'd date him but she anted to work for him. Jason said he doesn't believe that she did this before she met him either. He said that she had just gotten her implants about 3 weeks before he met her so she was all worked up and ready to go out and do her thing.
Jason was also saying that Ashley didn't talk much about her family. He said that she was working as a cocktail waitress at a club and he thought that he'd tell the owner that she worked for him, thinking that it would be good for his business. She got very mad at him for doing that though.
Howard asked if it was true that this Ashley had been with Charlie Sheen. Jason said that she ''probably'' was but he didn't seem to want to say what he actually knew. He said that he heard stories about her possibly being with him but he didn't know for sure.
Howard talked to Jason more about what this Ashley did. Jason told Howard that she was very good at her job and she could have just about any guy she wanted to.
Howard asked Jason about a site where they let john's give reviews of the girls they dated. Jason said that the girls were very competitive and the one girl who always got 10 ratings was this Natalia. He said that's how they knew that she was so good. He said that he found some reviews of Ashley, who was known as Victoria back then, and he wanted to give them some of that information. He let Howard read through some of that stuff.
Howard read the reviews of ''Victoria'' where the guys describe what the girls do to them. One guy gave all of the details talking about the stuff they did and how she was a 10 and a once in a lifetime chick. Another guy gave the details about his blow job, his doggy style bang and how wet she was. In another one the guy described the same types of things and how she had licked and sucked his balls. Howard said he likes that and maybe he should go to this chick.
Howard said that there were a lot of abbreviations in the descriptions like:
Howard said that more and more was coming out about this stuff and he wondered what's going to happen to this Victoria or Ashley or whatever her name is. She's already making money from her music so that's one thing she could go on to do.
Howard gave Jason some plugs for his new business, a matchmaking business, at DNADiamonds.com. Howard explained what he does there and how he sets people up on dates, but not for sex. Jason said that the women there are 8, 9 and 10s in his opinion.
Jason had a chick with him this morning and he said that she's a cocktail waitress. Howard told the guys to bring her in after that. Jason said that he was going to offer Artie the chance to find him a wife. He said that he'd give him a free trial at his web site and do a nationwide search for him, which usually runs $100,000, for free.
Jennifer came in and Artie said that he wouldn't mind dating her. Howard asked Jennifer what she thought about this rich guy set up thing. She said that she respects what Jason does and some girls want to do that and it's fine. She said that she's not doing that though. She said she would if she wanted to find a great guy like that.
Howard told Jennifer that he's pretty sure she could make some good money doing that kind of thing. She said that she's met some guys doing what she does for Marquee there in the city and Tao out in Vegas.
Artie asked Jennifer if she ever FFG. She didn't know what that was so Artie told her it was ''Fuck Fat Guys.'' She just laughed.
Bong Hit Eric called in and asked them to put a picture of this chick up on Howard's web site. Artie told him to calm down with that, they weren't done with her yet.
Bong Hit went on to tell Jason that he was an inspiration to him. He asked if he'll ever have a movie made about him. Jason said that he has had some talks about that but nothing has come of it yet.
Another caller asked what the tattoos on Ashley's hands were about. Jason had no idea. Ralph called in and said that he loves all of this stuff because it's finally not a guy sleeping with an 11 year old boy or something.
Jason told Artie about what he's going to do for him and how he's probably going to take about 4-6 months to find him a wife. He said that he's going to have a couple of women a week that he'll send to him and he should be able to find someone within that time. Howard said that if it were him, he'd probably drag that out for a couple of years. Artie said that he's pretty sure that he won't find the right girl until the last one he sends to him. He sounded like he was going to drag it out a while.
Ralph asked why a guy like Elliot Spitzer would go to someone like that when he's not making all that much money. Howard said that there are a lot of guys out there who can't hook up with a hot chick because they don't have a rap or anything. That's the kind of guy who has to go to a service like that. Jason said that they can charge anywhere from $10,000 to $100,000 to do a search like that.
Jason said that they take care of everything and they'll even take care of a preliminary pre-nuptial agreement for these guys. Artie said that he's not sure he'd want to get married anyway. He said he was just at a wedding over the weekend and it was kind of depressing. He's not sure he can commit to something like that. He said he will take Jason up on his offer though.
Artie asked if he's a loser for doing this. Howard told him that he's really not. He said that the reason he's not a loser is because he's a great guy, a busy guy and he doesn't have time to meet chicks. He said that he knows that he's kind of shy and afraid to talk himself up. He doesn't make things happen that way and he admires that in a way. He said that Artie isn't going to impose himself on people and he kind of likes that. That doesn't help him out in his life finding a woman though. Now Jason has come into his life and he can help find him that woman that he's looking for.
Howard said that if he were single right now, and Jason came to him with a woman like Jennifer, he'd probably go for something like that.
Howard said hello to the new Miss Howard TV and said that she was wearing a thong. He had her spin around but Artie was getting all upset because he was getting depressed. He said that she was the hottest chick he had ever seen but Ralph said that he says that every time they have a hot chick in there. Howard said that her name is Brianna Frost. She said that she's half black. Artie picked that out and asked her about it. Howard said that she looks like a tan white chick to him.
Howard asked Brianna how they found her. She said that she just wrote in and told them that she wanted to be on the show. She's only 5'3'' tall though. Artie told her that she's gross being that small. He was just kidding though. He said that this is the type of chick that should have been with the governor.
Brianna said that she does some adult web cam web sites and she dos that live from her house. She masturbates on cam for guys. She said that the masturbation stuff is pre-recorded but she does some other naked stuff live.
Artie was going crazy for this girl. Howard asked her to ride the Sybian but she said she didn't think she could do that. Gary said that she said in the notes that she would do it. She said that she has a boyfriend right now. He's only 19 and she's 20. Howard said that she's like a Ferrari and he can't imagine that he knows how to drive her.
Gary said that she's never had an orgasm with a penis from what he read in the notes. She said that she thinks that she's never had a penis big enough. She said that she can get one when a guy eats her out though. She said that she had one guy who had about 8 and a half inches and even that didn't get her off. Howard said he doesn't think it's size then. He said that she must not look up to the guy enough or something and it's all in her head.
Brianna said that she blew her first guy when she was in 8th grade. Howard said that he read that she was really into him too. She said that she does have a crush on him. Howard told her to get on the Sybian but she really didn't sound like she was into it. Gary said that he's not even sure if she knows what it is.
They were about to get her on the Sybian but Mike Gange told her she had to take her top off for it to work. She said no way to that so they told her to just keep it on and give it a try. She eventually got on the machine but Gange interrupted again and told Gary to put on his mask. Artie said that Gange and Will should even put their masks on for this one.
Brianna got on the machine and Gary turned it on low speed. She was going crazy before they even turned it on. She was very sensitive to it and was screaming as soon as Gary turned it on. She said that she was going to cum so the guys told her that's what they wanted to hear. She stayed on it and let Gary keep the machine going. She said ''Holy shiiiiit'' as it was going and then started to moan and said she was done about a minute in. She said that she didn't orgasm, she was just done with it. She said that she can't just cum on demand, it takes a while. Artie asked if he could eat her out, that would make her cum.
Howard asked for a flash from Brianna so she gave them a quick one. Artie asked if they were real. She said they were but Howard said they weren't. Gary said that they don't move like real tits. She said that they are real though. She swore to god that they were real and Artie said that they were perfect. He ran over to touch them to find out. He felt her up and said he thinks that they are real. Gary said that they looked fake to him. She said she wanted to get implants but the guys told her not to.
Ronnie came in and put a flashlight under her boobs to find an implant. Ronnie ruled that they were real. Jason said that they were amazing breasts.
Howard asked Brianna if she was going to finish her ride or not. She said she was scared so she was done. Ralph asked Jason if they charge the girls in this search that they do. Jason said of course they don't. Howard thanked Brianna for coming in and said that the subscribers are in for a treat when they see her.
Jason said that they're working on a reality TV show and he's having some fun with that. He said that Artie can be on the show if he wants to but he doesn't have to. Artie said he'd rather jump off a bridge. Jason also said that he's looking for some partners and if you're interested you can e-mail him at Jason.Itzler@yahoo.com.
Howard took a call from Beetlejuice who said that he wants Jason to get him laid. He didn't have much of anything else to add to the discussion though. Howard wrapped up after Brianna got in a plug for her web site BriannaFrost.com.
Fred said that he still thinks that they're fake. She said that they can't possibly be real and if they sit straight up when she lays on her back, they can't be real. Howard said that they checked her and Ronnie said that they're real. Benjy said that he could do it and prove that they were fake if she laid on the floor and he laid on top of her. Howard turned off his microphone and told him he was taking this somewhere he didn't want to go.
Artie said that he felt those boobs and Ronnie did the test and they were real. Fred said that the spacing of the nipples was off though. He said that there's almost an entire inch difference and they can't be real. Artie said that her ass was great too.
Howard said that Jason said that he'll have a girl for Artie in about a week from now. Artie didn't seem that excited about it though.
Howard read through some e-mail he got about Eric the Midget coming back to the show. A lot of the fans aren't too happy he's back and they don't want him calling in. Howard said there weren't too many people who were happy to have him back.
Howard had some e-mail about Spitzer's hooker and how she's really not all that hot. There was a lot of feedback about Artie wanting to go up against a major league pitcher. Artie said that he just said that he'll get a hit off of a pitcher. Some of the fans think he's out of his mind thinking that he can get a hit.
Artie said that everyone thought that he wouldn't be able to get a hit off that softball chick that he did get a hit off of. He said that they didn't believe in him back then and they don't believe in him now.
Howard had Steve Langford come in with his Howard 100 News preview. Steve said that they're working on a story about this guy Patrick who is trying to help Big Foot out by giving him a home. He was going to bring him home to New Jersey but things hit a snag over the weekend. Patrick says he's going to bring him back this week though. Howard said he must have a lot of love for life to help someone out like that.
Howard said that he had a clip from last year when Sal was out asking some people about St. Patrick's day. He asked some white people about that and had one woman going off using the N-word about other ethnic parades.
Artie said that Sal called the gay parade an ethnic parade in that clip. Howard said that Gary was going through some old tape and found Sal trying to defend him on some interview show years ago. Sal and Chaunce Hayden were trying to defend him but Sal was saying some really dopey stuff. Howard played the audio from that interview and Sal was saying that what Howard does is nothing like what Janet Jackson did at the Super Bowl. He also said that when Howard is wrong, he compensates the FCC.
In one clip Sal points out some of the other things that Howard has done on the show like using the N-word and doing other edgy material. He asked the guy who was on with him why he wasn't going after him back then. Howard said that he's not defending him at all there. Artie was laughing at the stuff that Sal was saying. He kept saying stuff that didn't make any sense and wasn't helping Howard's defense at all in the argument.
The guys stopped the tape and said that what Sal was saying made no sense at all. Gary said that there was a moment when they ask Sal if it was okay for his kids to walk into a store and buy a pornographic magazine. He wanted Howard to guess what his answer was going to be. They didn't guess but Sal said that if his son does do that, he should buy him a pornographic magazine too. Artie said that if he heard that argument, and he wasn't a fan, he'd be so against the show.
Steve got back to his news preview. He said that they have a story about JD and Jared's fight. They had some t-shirts that they had made up for them and JD's shirts went faster than Jared's did. That led to Howard talking about how JD was in contact with one of these chicks on the web and she had invited him down to a club to see her. JD said that she's a stripper and he went down to the China club to meet her. He went down to meet her but they wouldn't even let him into the club. He was on the list but they didn't even let him in. Howard figured they were on a nerd alert that night. He said they'll have to boycott that club from now on.
Gary said that he heard that they were asking him how he knew the woman or the guy that he was going there for. JD said that he told them about that and that he was on the list but they just wouldn't let him in.
Howard asked JD to pretend that he was the door man and talk to him as if he were trying to get in. JD mumbled something and then tried to get into the club through Howard. JD said that the guy didn't even say any words to him, he just gave him a look.
Steve said that they have a story about a radio show host at Montclair State University whose show was canceled after he had a woman naked and lap dancing for him in the studio. He also mentioned that they have the Mark the Bagger show on tonight at 7 on Howard 101.
Howard got in a plug for the Win Jon Hein's Money contest they have coming up soon. He said that they're still looking for people to play that game. Jon was in so he ran down his Wrap Up Show preview. He mentioned the stuff that they were going to be covering today which included most of what happened on the show today.
Howard said that he wishes the guy the best but there was a really disturbing piece about the guy in the news over the weekend. He said that the guy has been legally blind since he was a young kid. He said that's a tough thing to overcome but he's been very forceful in his life. He said that he's got a piece of ass wife and she's very nice. He then read the story about the guy and how, when he was a state governor, he did some shady things. He read through the stuff in the article Robin said that she read that and talked about some of the other things that he was behind. Not much of that was making them very confident in the guy but they're hoping for the best. Robin continued with that story and some other stuff about Governor Spitzer after Howard let Jeff go.
Howard said he had a story about Clear Channel having a meeting with the FCC chairman recently and they had some demands for the merger if it goes through. They want to take away most of the business. He said they're opposed to the whole merger but if it does go through, they'd like 50 percent of the bandwidth to be leased out to other companies. They also want some of the bandwidth to be used for local programming from terrestrial radio stations. The guys spent a few minutes on that subject before Robin moved on.
Robin brought up a story about Deena McGreevy who had some problems with her governor husband. Her's came out as a gay man. Now there's a guy coming out and saying that she knew that her husband was gay even though she denies that she did.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that this new governor is under investigation for firing some white people for no good reason. The caller said the guy claimed he didn't know they were white because he's blind so that's the excuse he's using. Howard said he hadn't read that one. He let the guy go and had Robin go through more of her news.
Another caller said that he can't imagine how the cops in New York are going to react to this new governor. Howard said that some of them may have a problem with him but he's hoping that he can rise to the office and do a good job while he's there. The caller said that a leopard never loses its spots though. That led to Artie doing an impression of the guy and making him sound really racist based on what he called the guy when he first called in. It was kind of a mix of Dice and the guy on the phone.
Robin got back to her news and read about the drummer from Abba passing away. Howard said he didn't even know there was a drummer in that band. That led to him and Artie singing some Abba songs. Howard played some of their songs and there was some drumming in there. He said he didn't know that there was any until he heard the song. Robin gave them the details of the story and how they found that he had accidentally sliced open his neck when he fell through some glass. He died in his garden trying to get some help.
Robin read a story about Britney Spears going out to dinner with Mel Gibson. She had another story about the doctors in the John Ritter case being cleared in his death. Howard said that he understands some malpractice cases but he thinks that John's number was just up and the doctors aren't superman and can't fix everything.
Ralph called in and asked Fred how he had the glass shattering sound so quick for Robin's news story about the Abba drummer dying. Fred said that he goes through the news and assumed that she was going to read something about it. Robin never really knows exactly what stories she's going to go through so he just kind of makes it up as she's going along. He played another crashing sound and wanted Ralph to guess what that was going to be for. Artie knew that it was for the crane collapse that happened in the city over the weekend. He was right. Robin actually had that story coming up next.
Robin read the story about the crane collapse and that led to the guys talking about the many things in the city that can come crashing down on you. Artie said there's another crane in the city, near 8th and 42nd that looks like it could come crashing down. He thought that's the one that had come down when he heard the story. They talked about some of the stories they heard about the rescue stories in that collapse. Artie said that it was another one of those cases where the firemen were right in there trying to save people and breathing in that dust and crap.
Robin read a story about the tornado that ripped through Atlanta over the weekend. She had another story about Barack Obama and the controversy over the preacher that he's friends with.
Howard took a phone call from a guy who asked if he really thinks that seeing another man in a room with a guy is gay. Howard had said that earlier when he was talking about Governor McGreevy. Howard said that of course it's gay if you want a man in there banging your wife. He said that he can't imagine doing that with another dude in the room. They finished up the news a short time later and ended the show around 11:55am.
Artie brought up one bit they did on the show when Billy West was doing his Marge Schott impression and making up all kinds of racist stuff about St. Patrick's day.
Artie said that Teddy was telling him about the parade that he's going to in Hoboken. when they asked him about that Teddy wasn't able to get his microphone to work so they gave up on the discussion.
Jon brought up the Jason Itzler interview they did earlier and asked Artie about the dating thing that Jason is setting him up with. Gary said that Jason is taking it very seriously and he really wants him to do it. Gary said that Jason has heard that Artie doesn't follow through on stuff but he really wants him to do it. Artie said he knows that it'll be good for the show so that's why he'll go through with it.
Artie said that he knows that the guy is doing this for free to show how great his service is but he's not going to get married. He said there's no way he's going to find him a wife in 6 months. He said that if one of them is that Brianna broad though, he'd get married today.
Artie said that he's had some really cut chicks since he and Dana broke up. Gary said that he should call some of the chicks that have given him their numbers.
Artie said that Jason is going to send him 2 chicks a week but he thinks that they're just going to sit around his apartment as he writes his book. Jon thinks that Howard just wants to do this for the show and it's not wanting him to find a chick for real. Gary said that it's a date and not a pity thing so he doesn't think that there's anything wrong with it.
Artie said that he doesn't want to give the guy his net worth and stuff like that. He doesn't need him hanging out with his pimp buddies talking about the kind of money he's making. He said he'd like to send teddy out to do the interview with that guy and maybe even do the dates. He said that he could come in at the end of the date and just jerk off on the chick's face and then leave.
Artie said that he was watching this movie ''Crumb'' that was really great. He said that it was from about 1995 and he saw it back then but he just watched it again. He said it's unbelievably fascinating to him. IT's about this guy Robert Crumb. He went through the story and talked about the movie with the guys and said that he as similar thoughts to the character in that movie because he wants to cut of a chick's head. He said that he even has a bit in his stand-up act about something like that. He cracked himself up talking about the joke in his act where he talks about how great it would be to have a female Mayor McCheese character as a girlfriend.
Gary and Artie talked about the movie Crumb some more and Artie said that he's not too far from becoming the brother, Charles Crumb, in that movie.
Jon went to the phones and took a call from a guy who said that he has to go through life with the name Adolf. He said that he meets nice women all the time and dated a 23 year old and he's now dating a 40 year old. He said that he thinks that Artie has a chip on his shoulder and there are a million women out there who will love him. Artie said that he doesn't think that only a whore will love him. He said that Dana was the farthest thing from a whore and she really loved him. He just had problems with heroin and stuff.
The caller told Artie that he has to get over the dog thing and not hate innocent animals like that. Artie said he doesn't hate dogs but he doesn't want one in his house. He said that if he found a dog hair in his food, he'd have to kick out the dog and the wife.
Jon took another call from a guy who said that what this guy Jason is offering him is a great thing and he should give it a try. He said he might be too busy to find a chick and this guy can help. He said he knows that Artie probably can't believe that a woman is going to be into him going through a service like that. The caller said it's kind of like that movie ''hitch'' with Will Smith in it. Artie goofed on that movie a little bit but thanked the caller for his comments.
Ralph called in and said that he doesn't get his hesitation with this guy. He said that Artie is busy and working hard and he doesn't have time to find a chick that's going to have the same interests as him. He said that Jason is going to do the legwork in all of this and maybe he'll find someone for him. He wondered why he'd hesitate on any level. Artie said that this is the best pep talk he's had so far and maybe it doesn't mean he's a complete loser in all of this.
Ralph told Artie to just give it a try and not be so uptight with it. Artie said that it could be kind of cool to have some guy doing all of the legwork. He said that he could request a chick who has big tits and can write prescriptions. Ralph knew he was joking but he thinks that he should really give it a serious try and report on it on the show. Artie said he's going to try it and he'll see what happens.
Ralph also asked the guys if they're watching John Adams on HBO. He said that it's really good. Artie said that he saw some of that and it really was good. He watched a couple of episodes so far. He said that the guys who ran this country back then were really ballsy. He and Ralph spent a minute on that. Artie said that the NY Times hated it because of Paul Giamatti. Ralph said that he thought he was so good in it that he didn't even see Paul, he just saw John Adams.
Jon took a call from a woman who asked if he's seeing a shrink right now. He said that he's not. the woman said that he seems to be not as funny and more serious now. She said that it always comes back around to him in a conversation too. Artie didn't get why that was his fault. She said that he just talks about himself and he should give other people a chance.
Artie told the woman that she was an annoying cunt and went off on her a little bit. He told her that she sounds obsessed with him and she should get off his ass and leave him alone. The two of them went back and forth a little bit and got nowhere. She said that the Wrap Up Show is much better when he's not there. She said that Howard's show is the same way. Artie told her that he wishes that she were his boss so she could tell him not to come back because he'd love that.
Artie didn't get how it was his fault if the story comes around to him. Gary told her that's what Artie is there for. She had hung up by that point, maybe because Artie had called her a cunt 5 times. He said that she had called in before and she always goes off on him.
Benjy said that whenever Artie is in that fighting mood he always backs off the mic like he's in some kind of fight.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that woman had no business talking about him that way. He said that he loves Artie on the show and he's one of his biggest fans. He said that he thinks that Howard is the one who stomps on people on the show all the time. He's not sure what that's about. Artie said this shows how different opinions are about the show.
Gary said that the fans really do have differing opinions and you can't drive yourself nuts thinking about that stuff one way or the other.
Artie said that when he doesn't talk on the show, he keeps himself quiet because he thinks that Howard wants him to stay quiet. He said sometimes Howard will let him talk and if he gets that hint that he wants him to shut up, he'll do it. He respects Howard and the way he does the show so he's just doing it the best way he knows.
Gary said that Howard is the one who controls all of the show and if he didn't want Artie to speak, he'd stop him. Artie said that there are times when he feels he should just stay quiet during the show. He did that when Gallagher was in there and he did it when Paul McCartney was in.
Gary said that he hates hitting people up for stuff and he's probably done that to Artie about 3 times in 7 years. He said he doesn't like doing it but Artie said that he has no problem giving money to charity like that.
Jason came in and said that he doesn't mind all of this stuff. He said that Robin asked him to be part of her group but it had no name when he joined. He had no idea it was going to be Girls Night Out. He said he's not sure why he was asked and no one else was asked to be in the group. He said that they can joke about it all they want, he's proud that he's part of the group.
Jason said that he's a core committee member of the group according to what Robin told him. Jason wondered why no one gave Howard any shit for wishing his dog a happy birthday today. Artie agreed with him there. He said that there is a double standard there but he is the boss so no one says anything.
Jon took a call and asked the guys what Robin does to prepare for the show because she seems to be involved in so many other things. Gary said that she's reading news and watching TV. He's not sure what else she's supposed to be involved with. The caller said that he thinks that she should be part of the group and bouncing ideas off the other guys on the show in their Lotus Notes sessions. Artie said that he doesn't do any of that stuff either. He prepares for the show even less than Robin does.
Gary said that Robin isn't just the news person, she's the co-host of the show and she does a great job doing it. Artie said that if anyone should catch shit for not contributing to the show, it should be him. He said that he could be on Lotus notes contributing but he's not. The guys talked about how the show is really off when Robin isn't there and she's a major part of the show.
Jon asked Artie if he's been using his laptop computer that he got when they started there. Artie said that it's currently being used to keep a table level. Gary asked him if he ever feels he should be e-mailing. Artie said that he feels that all the time because young chicks like that Brianna chick ask for his e-mail before his phone number. He said that he's never e-mailed but he does text because a hot chick got him into that. They spent a minute on that and had to go to break a short time later. Artie said that he'd call in before the end of the show to make sure they brought everything back to him like that woman had said earlier.
Gary said that Jimmy had applied to be an intern on the show 5 times. He got a call to be an intern on the show but then he got a call from his record company on the same day and he had to go with the record company deal. His band, The Bloodhound Gang, has had a couple of hits.
Jon played a clip of Mark reading his note that he read earlier on Howard's show. Jon said that Mark must have been happy to get all of that off his chest. He said ''yeah'' to that and didn't have much of anything else to say.
Gary asked Mark about why he stopped doing the show for the past 2 years. Mark said that he was upset with his mother being upset about what he talked about on the air. Benjy asked about the Mayor coming up to him and asking about the gay thing. Mark said that the guy just asked him if he was gay and he told him he used to be. Jimmy thought that he had cursed the guy out. Mark said he did that too.
Mark said that things are all worked out with the Mayor now, he doesn't have any problems with that now. Benjy asked him if he has any kind of personality disorder. mark said no to that. He didn't know what that meant though. Jimmy said that he's not retarded or anything, he's just a little slow with some stuff.
The guys talked to Mark about the sniffing of women that he does. Mark said that he likes to smell hair and perfume and stuff. Jimmy asked his girlfriend to go over to him and let him sniff her. Mark sniffed her and said that he gets turned on when he sniffs a girl. He said he didn't have a boner from that though.
Gary asked him if he's ever smelled a woman that turned him off. Mark said ''No.'' He has a lot of yes and no answers to the questions they ask.
Jon took a couple of calls after that. One guy asked about the wooden spoon thing and he said that it was something that shouldn't have happened and it won't happen again. Another guy said that Jimmy and Mark are great on the show and they bring it up a notch. Jimmy wasn't sure if that was the case or not but he did pat himself on the back for a joke he told during his segment earlier.
Jon asked Mark about his show that's airing tonight and if he's looking forward to that. Mark said that he is and he'll be talking about sports and stuff like that. He said that there is something that he doesn't want to talk about and it's the gay stuff.
Gary asked Mark if he's going to be voting this coming election. Mark said that he's a registered voter and he's going to vote for Hillary Clinton. He thinks that it's time for a woman to be President. He said he voted for Bush the last time.
Howard started off the show saying that Artie was late. He said he's not sure where he is. He said that he was on the Wrap Up Show accusing him of something that wasn't true. Artie came walking in around that time. He was kind of out of it so Howard asked him what was wrong. Artie said that he was just tired, he got up late.
Howard and the guys ended up talking about the HBO ''John Adams'' series. Howard said that he was going to watch it but then he realized that he didn't want to get started into it because it's 7 hours long. He said that he freed up a lot of time by not watching it. He said that he just can't get himself interested in that kind of thing with guys dressed the way they were.
The guys ended up talking about the guys who started this country and how brilliant they really were. They talked about some of the stuff they did to make this country as great as it turned out to be. Howard said that something as simple as making the presidency just 4 years long is great. There aren't many people in this world who are willing to give up power that easily.
Artie has been watching the John Adams special so he was telling Howard and Robin about what he'd seen. Howard said that he'll just take the highlights from Artie and Robin.
Artie said that Paul Giamatti got bashed in the NY Times article about the special. He said that they said that they just cast the wrong guy for the part. Robin wondered who they want to play that part, George Clooney or someone? Howard said that Will Smith would have been a great pick for the part.
Artie said that he took that back yesterday but maybe he didn't do it the right way. Howard said that Artie has a lot of issues and he understands that. He said that he would love it if he had a guy hooking him up with chicks like that and he thinks that Artie should be pleased with it too.
Artie said he was just speaking out loud on the show and maybe he didn't take it back the way he thought he did.
Howard said that Artie needs to get some chicks so he can have them spending some time with him at his new shore house. Artie said that he can't wait to ruin another summer.
Howard said that he's been watching the news and he wasn't sure what this Bear Stearns thing was all about. He asked Robin to explain it to him so she ran through the story and gave him the basics of what was going on.
Howard said that he saw that Jim Cramer was telling people not to sell their Bear Stearns stock last week. Robin said that he was right to do that but Howard said that he heard that one guy who was worth billions is now worth only 15 million.
Artie brought up the Tiger Woods thing again. That led to the guys talking about some golf stuff. they were talking about Tiger Woods, Jack Nicklaus and others. Then they talked about how big that sport pays compared to bowling. Howard said that you don't see any pro bowlers buying $65 million houses. He said that might be the sport for him to get into.
Howard thought that all of the lanes were the same so it's not that big of a difference to bowl in different places. Gary told Howard that they are all different. He said that they have some guys who are making good money doing the bowling thing. He said that they're not making Tiger Woods kind of money but they are doing okay.
Gary said that balls do break different on different lanes when you bowl. He said that it's like playing baseball in a different field. Howard said he heard that Scott the Engineer was the highest paid bowler out there. Artie said he's the most dedicated since he went bowling on 9/11.
Artie asked Robin what Scott did that day. She said that Scott dropped her off and then said he was going to go bowling. Robin wasn't able to get out of the city that day herself so Scott drove her to his house so she could hang out there a while. Robin said that he showed up about 10 minutes after he left to go bowling and got upset when he found out that their night was canceled and no one called him.
Howard asked where Scott was because he wanted to know about bowling. Scott came in a short time later and said he didn't know he wanted him in there. Then he ran through some names of the big guys in the game. He said that Walter Ray Williams and Chris Barnes are a couple of the bigger names in the game.
Howard asked Scott if he has any balls that those players use. Scott said that he's never done that, he doesn't guy stuff that those guys endorse.
Scott said that he had a 299 game one time and came very close to having a perfect game. Gary sounded surprised by that. Howard asked Scott if he would ever get a tattoo of holes in his head so he looks like a bowling ball. Scott isn't going to do that.
Scott said there's another guy in bowling who looks like that retarded guy in ''Life Goes On.'' He told Howard to look that guy up to see what he looks like. His name is Patrick Allen. Robin said that they don't even have a picture of him on his own web site. Scott told her to go to PBA.com and look him up there. Howard said that Scott always sends him some good articles from the web, he's always on there looking stuff up.
Gary said that they have some stats about the guys who bowl and what kind of money they make bowling. They had the earnings of that guy Chris Barnes and it looked like he was making about $120,000 a year. Scott said that they have to live in RVs and they go from town to town to do the bowling thing.
Robin wasn't able to find any pictures but Fred found one of Patrick Allen. He said that he looks a little bit like Benjy actually. They spent a minute talking about that and about some of the other guys in the game. Howard thanked Scott for the bowling analysis.
The caller told Howard that he had a Barack Obama update. He said that he came to Scranton yesterday and he almost got run out of town. There were a bunch of protesters outside of the place he was at. They were protesting him over that preacher dude that he's friends with. The guy said that he doesn't stick around and say hi to anyone now and he just ran off when he saw the crowd that was there to greet him.
Howard said that the guy has this lunatic preacher friend and it's making Barack look like an asshole. He said that the preacher seems to be out of his mind and they sell copies of his sermons like they're proud of them. Howard said that Barack has to know what he's up to and he can't claim that he didn't know what he was up to.
The preacher dude is out of the country now because of all of this controversy. Howard said that Obama doesn't need this guy around. People are pointing out that Barack has asked people to trust his judgment and then these tapes come out and it shows what we're supposed to trust.
Howard said that Hillary doesn't even have to do anything now. She can just sit back and watch him self destruct.
Howard said that he hopes that he did take care of her. She said that she'll be fine and Ron was a very good man and took care of her. Howard said he was hoping she was okay because she was out of touch for a while.
Jessica said that she was cut off for a while and things were kind of strange for a while. She said that her life is a mess. She said that things are okay now though. Howard told her that she needs a good working out and she needs to find someone to keep that body in shape. She said that she has always worked on her body.
Jessica said that she was trying to pass time and she started to do the bowling thing. She said that she got a pink bowling ball and she ended up getting a 150 her first time out. She said that she doesn't even know what that score means but she thought she lucked out with something that high.
Howard asked her if that's what she's doing since Ronnie died. She said that she really misses Ron. She usually just goes out to get out of the house and hangs out with her friends. She said that they just go anywhere.
Howard asked Jessica about what the process is to grieve for her man. He asked her how long it took before she went bowling. She said that it was friends who took her out to get her out of the house. She said that it was a guy friend, one of Ron's friends, who took her out.
Howard asked Jessica about why it was bowling and not putt-putt golf or something. She said that it just happened to bowling. She said that they had to get her a ball of her own because she didn't want to stick her fingers in a ball that other people had stuck their fingers in. She wasn't sure how much it cost though.
Jessica said that she's only been bowling 3 times and it was just to get her out of the house. She said that she wears jeans and a t-shirt with the bowling shoes. Howard asked her if she would bowl braless. She said that she guesses she would.
Jessica said that she feels like she's doing something wrong now that she's joking around about this stuff. She said that she gets letters from people when she appears on the show like this. Howard said that she has to enjoy her life and she can't just stay sad for the rest of it. He asked her if she's touched herself since Ron died. She said she hasn't.
Howard said that some people go out and fuck after someone dies in their life. That act of fucking releases something in a person and it releases grief in you. He thinks that she has done it and she should just admit it if she has. Jessica said that she feels guilty just being alive and she really hasn't done that. She said that she may do it sooner or later though. Robin said that it would probably be good for her if she did. Jessica said that she never really had to masturbate while Ronnie was around. She said goodbye a short time later after thanking the guys for their support.
Robin said that she got the e-mail when he resent it to her but Howard said that she still doesn't know how to use it correctly.
Howard said that Robin has a new assistant running around there. He said that she's really tough on her assistants. He said that the poor girl was walking around and she hasn't been introduced to anyone. He said that she knocked on Gary's office the other day and he didn't know who she was. Robin didn't tell anyone there that she had an assistant there.
Gary said that she's very nice but he still doesn't know what her name is. He also said that she wears earmuffs inside. Robin said her name is Stacy and she's following her around for the first few weeks to see what her life is like. Gary said that the guys almost tackled her the other day because she walked into the studio and no one knew who she was.
Robin said that she didn't know that she had to introduce her to everyone. She said that she won't remember everyone if she introduced her to 50 people at once. Howard said that she may not last more than a year so he figures they don't need to get to know her.
Robin said that she doesn't introducer her people to anyone there. Howard said that's crazy and she has to introduce them around. She said that Howard doesn't introduce anyone to her. He said that he never has anyone up there to introduce. Robin said that there are people up there all the time who work for Howard that he doesn't introduce. Howard said that he will tell people when he has someone coming up there to do work.
Howard found out that this Stacy will be there around 11 this morning so he said he has to get her into the studio. Robin said that she won't come in, she's already said that they'll never get her in there. Howard said he's going to get her in there. He wants to find out what's going on there.
Howard told Robin that his assistant goes out and buys him condoms and baby wipes. He said that he can't go out and buy that stuff himself, he's a big star. That led to him talking about how Beth doesn't shit much and it's great. He said that she doesn't shit for like a month. Robin said that's not good and she must be in a constant state of constipation.
Howard asked Robin when she last took a shit. She said that it was last night. She said that she never tells Jim when she's going to be shitting though. She doesn't tell him about her enemas either. Howard asked Robin to get her assistant to buy him baby wipes so she can do his dirty work. Artie asked if he could have Teddy to do that for him. Howard told him to have Teddy go out and buy a bunch of gay magazines for him instead. He said that might get him to quit. Artie said that he wouldn't really need Teddy if he didn't have all of these road gigs he has.
A caller asked Howard what he would do for Beth if she asked him to buy tampons. He said that he'd be proud to do that because it shows that he has a woman. He said that he'd love to go out and do that for her.
Howard said that he was going to play some clips from Mark the Bagger's show but he and Robin ended up talking about the new season of Dancing with the Stars. They talked about what they thought about Adam Carolla, Steve Gutenberg and Penn Jillette. Howard thought that Steve was worse than Adam was but Adam wasn't all that great either.
Howard said that there are no hot chicks on that show now. He and Robin talked about how freaky Priscilla Presley is looking these days. She's had far too much surgery on that face of hers. They talked about the disturbing look she has now. Robin said she looks like that Madam puppet.
The guys talked about Marlie Matlin and how she's not all that pleasant to look at either. Monica Selles wasn't looking too good either according to Howard. He said that he's kind of glad she's doing okay on the show because of that stabbing she had.
Howard said that Shannon Elizabeth isn't looking so good either. She hasn't been in anything other than American Pie as far as he knows. Howard said the hottest chick on there is this guy Mario that's on the show. Howard said that he's not that excited about the new season but he'll watch it anyway.
Artie said that he saw AJ Benza on Celebrity Fit Club and he was doing some odd stretching on the show. Artie said that he's glad that he doesn't have to do that show himself.
The guys were liking what they were hearing even though Mark and Jimmy weren't doing all that much. Howard played another clip where Mark was doing an impression of himself doing his ''yes'' answers. Jimmy told him that he was pretty bad at doing that impression.
In another clip Jimmy talked to Mark about masturbating and then his phone rang again. Mark answered again and had a conversation with whoever it was who called him. He told the person about what channel he was on and Jimmy just let him have the discussion. Robin and Artie were laughing their asses off hearing those clips.
Howard said that it's like listening to Alvin and the Chipmunks because Jimmy kind of sounds like the guy in the show. In another clip Mark got another phone call and took it live on the air. Everyone was calling him personally instead of calling into the show.
Howard played another clip where Mark talks about wiping his load on a chair. Jimmy asked him about his mother catching him jerking off so he tells a story about how his mom knows what he does. Then he says that he wipes his load on his chair and then wipes it off. Jimmy said that he has to smell that chair. Robin said that clip sickened her.
Howard played a clip where Jimmy took some calls. One guy asked Mark if he likes trimmed, shaved or hairy cock. He said he doesn't like any of them. The caller asked Mark a bunch of gay questions but Mark said that he's not into that stuff anymore. Jimmy had Mark explain how he's not gay anymore in that clip. A guy calls in and tells Mark that he has a girl for him. The caller then gets on and brings up some gay stuff with him. Mark was saying that he heard that there were a bunch of other Mark the Bagger guys on Myspace so maybe the guys were getting him confused with the imposters.
Jimmy asked Mark when he last had sex with a guy. Mark said that it was 10 years ago and it was one mistake he made. Jimmy asked him about when he first had sex with a girl. He said that it was about 3 or 4 years ago. Mark said that he has only had sex with one but he'd rather not discuss that.
Howard said that he had some more clips but he went to the phones instead. A woman called in and asked if it was true that Beth has a glass eye. Howard told her that wasn't true. Fred threw in a glass breaking sound clip as they were talking about that.
The woman said that she was hoping to get a tour of the studio since so many other losers get a tour. Howard said that it sounded like she was calling her husband a loser. She said that he's a NY Fire Fighter so Howard told her that if he really is one he'll give him a tour. Howard said that it's no wonder he runs into fires with a wife like that.
Howard put her on hold and mentioned that they had May Pang calling in today. He and Robin spent a minute talking about her. Howard also took a call from Sour Shoes who was doing his Paul McCartney impression. He was singing a bunch of his songs and doing a bunch of different impressions yelling at the top of his lungs. Howard kept him on the phone for a couple of minutes and let him do his Paul impression for a bit. He had some song parodies ready to go but Howard bailed out on his call a few minutes in. Artie said that he can picture his parents in the other room with the covers over their heads. Howard said the guy is like 40 years old and still living at home so it must drive them nuts. Howard said he had to go to break after that.
Howard let some of the Beatles song play through and talked about how great this one part was. He said that he should have a PhD in the Beatles. He said that Gary has one in Flock of Seagulls.
Howard was going to play the audio of Heather Mills talking about this settlement she made with Paul McCartney. Robin said she heard that Heather poured water on one of the attorney's heads during the trial. Robin said that it seems like that woman is out of her mind. She's getting $50 million plus something like $140,000 a year in child support.
Howard played the audio of Heather talking about how glad she was that this case was over. She was going on and on about how she knew that it was going to be between 20 and 30 million so she made out very well in the case. She was also saying that she was very pleased with the way things worked out. She was bad mouthing Paul and saying that she was going to support the charities that she wanted to support.
Howard said that she was irritating the crap out of him but he wanted to hear more of the audio. He played more of Heather talking about the settlement. She was telling the press all of the details of what she had just gotten in the judgment. She was saying that her daughter is only getting 35,000 pounds a year and she was saying this in front of all of these people who probably don't even make that in their professional life. She was awarded 50 million bucks and complaining that her daughter is only getting 35,000 a year. She could use that 50 million for the kid but she's making it seem like she's not getting enough.
Heather was saying that she was living with Paul before she got married but the judge apparently didn't believe that was the case and started the count when they got married.
Howard asked why no one picked up the girl with the fire fighter chick that he put on hold earlier. He told them to handle it now since she had been on hold all this time.
Howard got back to the Heather Mills audio and played more of her rambling on and on. She was saying that the judge thought that Paul was only worth 400 million but she knows that he's worth 800 million. She complained that she was locked out of every home and wasn't allowed access to any of his records.
Howard said that he sat down with this Paul McCartney and asked him what the hell he was doing back when he was getting married. He knew that it was a mistake not to go into it with a pre-nup and he warned Paul about that.
Howard said that he knew the guy for like 2 years. He met him when he moved to Rockville Center. Artie wondered what the story was there. She said that it was about Howard's childhood friend and she though it was a great story. Artie said that it was a horrible story. Howard said that he doesn't think he played chess with him either. Artie told her that it was all wrong. Howard said that tomorrow Lisa is working on a story about how his parents have a TV set.
Lisa said she likes hearing stories about the people that Howard hung out with when he was a child. Artie told her that it was just horrible.
Lisa said that they have a story about Dr. Roni, Robin's diet doctor. Artie goofed on her a little bit about that story too. Howard said that he thinks it sounds like a good news day. Artie laughed but Howard said he was serious.
Howard asked Lisa what else she had. She said that she has a story about Riley Martin's six birds. She said that she interviewed him about the birds and what he has to do to take care of them. Howard said it's no wonder he needs so much money, he has to take care of all of the birds.
Howard said that he's talked to a lot of college students about stuff like this. He said that he's gone to some colleges and talked to a bunch of people. He said that he thinks that they should have rules on college radio. He said that it might be exciting to hear him doing his thing on the air but on campus they have a set of rules. He said that maybe the rules weren't all that clear.
Randy said that he was told that as long as they didn't have nudity and didn't curse, he'd be fine. Howard said that he got fired from his college radio station but he ended up getting reinstated. Howard said that he was doing stuff back then that was never done on radio.
Howard said that they've done those things that Randy did. He said that it seems like fun going right into doing stuff like that but you have to think about the female students at the school and what they're going to be hearing.
Randy said that they're going to be doing a private podcast from now on and not do that kind of stuff on the radio station. Howard said that it takes some time to figure out how to do a show like that on the air. Robin said that's what radio has become though so that's what they're going to do when they go into the studio.
Randy said that they didn't do anything like that in the first 2 seasons, they did it in the third season. Randy said that they're much better off being on Live365.com. They start that next week. Howard let him go a short time later.
Howard played some audio of Sal and Richard going out and interviewing a bunch of people about St. Patrick's day. They were asking drunk guys about giving up drinking to save people in other countries. one guy was saying ''Fuck that!'' over and over whenever he was asked questions.
Howard played another interview where they asked a guy the same type of questions. These guys were all saying that they wouldn't give up drinking and they wouldn't be there if St. Patrick was black. They had some audio of some people screaming out on the street and cursing like crazy.
Another caller said that he was glad that Howard turned him on to ''In Treatment'' on HBO. Howard said that the acting is great on that show and he thinks that they're all great. He talked about some of the other actresses on the show. He said that it's on HBO on demand too so that's the best way to catch up with the show. Howard said that he just started watching it this year but he's not sure how long its been on the air.
Howard said that he and Beth made love last night so he wasn't able to see The Bachelor. Robin told Artie that he has to watch some of those shows so he can get laid. Artie said that he'd rather die alone.
Bobo called in and said that he thought Adam Carolla was good on the show last night even though they were calling him a stiff. Howard said that they're not dancers and not very coordinated so he gets why they're not that great. He said that they did try hard though and did pretty good.
Howard said that he's not excited about that because there aren't any hot chicks on the show. He said that he's still going to watch the show though.
Howard asked Robin who Magic Matt Allen is. She didn't know. He said that he was on Z-100 at one point and now works there at SIRIUS. He said that the guy contacted him and told him that he owns Johnny Carson's couch from the Tonight Show. He said that they had it on the show for about a decade and now the guy has it up on eBay for sale.
Howard said that he wouldn't give the guy 10 cents for it but there are people who would want that stuff. He said that he's got a bid of $99,000. Then he saw that it was the starting bid. He's teamed up with the guy who owned his desk so they're auctioning off both.
Howard said that he wasn't sure if he wanted to talk to that guy or not. He read some notes about the couch and desk and thought about if he should talk to the guy. He said that he really had to take a break there though.
Howard played a new song parody from Dan the Song Parody Man. He got in all of those different names that they call him on the show. It was to the tune of the Green Acres theme song. He threw in the ''Ack, Ack'' sound clip in there too.
Howard replayed more of the St. Patrick's day audio that Sal and Richard got. Howard asked what makes Robin sicker, them or heather Mills. Howard said it was Heather. He said he really dislikes that woman.
Howard figured that you'd need sight to cheat but that's apparently not the case. He said that even that guy needed some strange. He said he read the article quickly and he thinks that his wife had affairs too. Robin said that was the case.
Howard ended up hanging up on Misty after she gave more thoughts on the whole Spitzer thing. He said that was the idiotic side of the story.
Howard read through some e-mail about the new Miss Howard TV. Some guys were saying that Artie was right about how hot she was. That led to the guys talking about Brianna's breasts and how they looked like they might be fake but she claimed they were real. Artie felt them and thought they were real.
Robin said that Howard has been backing away from touching women these days. He said that he wasn't given any orders or anything but he said that he doesn't want to upset his family or Beth. He said that a lot of his actions don't go unnoticed these days so he watches what he does. He said that he's 54 years old now and he doesn't feel it's right to touch a 20 year old. He said he's not comfortable with it. He said he loves looking at younger women and doesn't have a problem having them in the studio. He has no problem with nudity or riding the Sybian or anything like that. He said that he's 54 and has a 15 year old, a 25 year old and another one graduating college. He said that there comes a time in a dude's life and that's what's going on with him. He said he wasn't given any ultimatums or anything, this was his choice.
Howard figures that he'll be able to start feeling titties again when he's about 75. Then it'll be cute to the young girls. Artie said that George Carlin has turned into that old man these days and it's kind of scary. Howard said that he thinks he's doing the audience a favor not touching the boobs and stuff. He said that's what he wants and that's why he's not touching them these days. Artie deserves that chance so he lets him do it instead.
Howard asked Artie if he was taking Subutex yesterday when Brianna was in there. He said he wasn't but now that he's getting to know Jason Itzler, he may be using it more and more.
Howard asked Artie what he would rather do, fuck that Brianna chick or hit for the Yankees just one time. Artie said that he'd take Brianna before the Yankees thing. He said that they'd both be very quick but one is going to be much more memorable. He'd rather fuck Brianna. Howard said he's with him on that. He said he showed her picture to Beth and she thinks that she could model professionally.
Howard said that he's tried to watch some of her videos on her web site but he keeps getting a password request so it was driving him nuts.
Howard said that he got a lot of feedback about Robin's ''Girls Night Out'' club. He was talking to Beth about that and had her guessing who was in the group. Howard said that the group is shocking and the fans are sending in a lot of mail about that. He read through a few of those e-mails and the fans are saying that Robin is a snob.
One person wrote in and suggested that Robin could feed all of Africa with her breasts and lose just one cup size. Someone suggested that Robin call her group ''Just-tits League of America.'' Artie suggested chicks with Dicks but Robin said that it would be Chicks with a Dick since they just have one man in the group.
Howard said that some people are complaining about Robin's printer and the noise it makes on the air. Howard said he hasn't heard it but if the fans are hearing it they should do something. Robin said that she's asked for a quiet printer but they haven't gotten her one.
Howard read some mail about this Barack Obama controversy with the preacher. That got the guys talking about that for a few minutes. Artie was wondering how Oprah is spinning this story. No one was sure but Howard said he heard that she actually went to the same church.
Howard read through some more mail and had some stuff about Artie. Some people felt bad for him with his luck with women. That makes him fit right in with regular guys according to some e-mail. Howard said that he really does have bad luck, especially after Vinnie Favale screwed up and e-mailed Dana about what he was supposed to be doing with the chicks that night he did Letterman.
Howard said that they got a lot of feedback about Jason Itzler and people were enjoying that interview. They spent a short time talking about that.
Howard said that some people were wondering about why Mark the Bagger hadn't been on in 2 years. Howard said that was Mark not coming on because he was upset with them for a while. Howard said that his show was great last night and it was a big hit with the fans. He had a couple more clips to play so he finished up with those.
In one clip Mark the Bagger was telling Jimmy what his pick up lines are at bars and stuff. Howard said that the fans were saying that an hour is too short for that guy. In another clip Jimmy takes a phone call from a guy who says that Mark sent him pictures of himself with dildos in his ass. Mark said that he's pretty sure that wasn't him but he does have a co-worker that's into that. Jimmy said that he had forgotten that Mark had taken pictures of himself masturbating with some friends of his. Mark confirmed that and said it was just a joke. He said that he jerked off in his friend's dorm bathroom. He said it was just a young kid's joke.
Howard said that he loves that someone will call in with a crazy accusation and Mark will actually have something in his life that relates to it.
Howard played one more clip of Mark talking about how he cleans his sink with his toothbrush. Mark said that he uses the toothbrush to clean the toothpaste out of the sink if it's stuck in there. Jimmy told him that might be why his teeth look like butterscotch. Howard had to go to break after that.
Howard said that they have a phone number that must be close to a complaint department. He said that the guys took a call the other day and Richard and Sal busted this woman's balls while she complained. In the call the woman says that she got a bill from them that she paid and isn't showing up on her account. They kept calling her ''sir'' and saying that her name was Harold, Howard or Herman when she'd say that her name was Helena. Howard said that Sal and Richard are so happy when they get a call like that. Richard and Sal jerked her around for a few minutes going back and forth and pretending to transfer her call. She eventually hangs up after 10 minutes. Howard said they cut it down to 2 minutes from that 10 minute call.
Howard said that it had been a while since they last say May. He said that her vagina was entered by John Lennon. He wanted to think about that for a little while. He said that she was also married to Tony Visconte for a little while. She said that extramarital affairs don't work in her life so she had to split from him. She said that they worked things out after that for their kids. She said that one of her son's is almost 19 now.
Howard asked May if she ever thought she'd be doing another book about John Lennon because it seemed that she had exhausted everything.
Howard said that Gary had a story about May. He said that she asked Gary to come to his apartment one time when he ran into her out at an appearance one time. Gary thought that she wanted to bang him but when he got to her apartment, she just showed him a filing system of cassette tapes of some recording sessions that she had kept over the years. IT turned out she had some old tapes of Jon Bon Jovi doing these recording sessions from back when he was first starting out.
Gary said that there was no sexual tension between them at all. It was more like she was the teacher and he was a student. He said that she just wanted to tell him about stuff and didn't want him at all. She just wanted to play some music for a music lover.
Howard said that John Lennon has ruled her whole life and that's probably why Tony couldn't take it anymore. Howard asked her if Gary would have had a chance with her at all. She said that she likes him as a friend only. Artie asked her why she'd play Bon Jovi for a music lover. Howard thought that was kind of mean but Artie said that Bon Jovi is like Bruce Springsteen Light.
Howard asked about this new book and what she has in it. She said that she has a bunch of pictures that they took together back in the day. Artie claimed he didn't get the name of the book right away but he seemed to be just jerking her around.
Howard talked to May about her dealings with Yoko Ono. She said that she hasn't made up with her or anything but she did run into her about a year and a half ago. She said that she wished her luck with what she was up to and she thanked her and about 5 minutes later she was waving at her and saying hi to her as if she hadn't seen her.
Howard asked what was going on with the signal in the studio today. He was hearing some buzzing going in and wanted to figure out what was causing it. He asked her to turn off her phone just in case that was it. She turned it off but the noise was still there. He said that something was making him mental in there today. She had a cell phone that she claimed was off but there was something causing that cell phone sound over the phone.
Scott the Engineer came in and changed her headphones and it seemed to fix the problem. Scott said that he'd check into it later and fix the problem.
Howard asked May if John's penis was the largest she ever had. She didn't want to answer that. She said that there are people out there who don't want to hear about that stuff. She said that her son would get upset if he heard that. Howard thinks that her son would love to hear that she carries a bit of that history inside of her.
Howard asked if May and John used rubbers. He got a no from her on that. He asked her if she ever dreamed that she'd have his baby. She was on the pill at the time so she wasn't thinking about that. She claims that John wanted her to have his child but she never wished for that herself.
May brought up her book and tried to change the subject. Howard wanted to know how they were going to document the size of his penis if she didn't talk about it. He asked her about how long its been since she last had sex. She said that it had been 3 or 4 years. Artie said that he'd do her and she could be May Pang Lange if they got married. It had a show business ring to it.
Howard asked May about fantasizing about John when she pleasures herself today. She said that she never thinks about that. She said that she hasn't even thought about any of that stuff in a long time. She said that she doesn't pleasure herself these days. She claims that she doesn't have those desires at this time. Howard asked Robin if that's possible. Robin said that she can't call her a liar about something like that.
Howard asked May if she ever had to put her hands down there to get herself to sleep. She insisted that she didn't so Howard said that she should take a lie detector test to find out.
Howard said that he thinks that John ruined her and now no man is good enough for her. Artie suggested the lead singer of Creed to go out with her. She didn't sound interested in that.
Howard said that May was smart because she took so many pictures of John. She said that John asked her to take them, she just held onto them since they were so great.
Howard asked May if it was true that she was with John in a Jacuzzi and he tried to strangle her. She said that they were in a car and he was trying to stop her from doing something. She said that the story was kind of exaggerated because John had just put his hand on her shoulder while she was driving. She said that he was drunk when he did it.
Howard asked about Phil Spector since he used to hang out with John and her. She said that he used to carry around a gun all the time and he used to shoot it off for no reason. She said that he shot it off in the studio one night. She said that Phil told the people not to tell him what to do and shot the gun to prove to them that they can't tell him what to do.
Howard asked May if John would be willing to do anything to make her happy. Stuff like 69 or anilingus. She said that Robin was laughing like crazy hearing that in her booth. May went on to say that John was a very giving man and he did make sure that she would have an orgasm. She said that he was fine doing regular intercourse. Howard said that was a big news item. He asked if he bathed before having sex with her. May was laughing at all of those questions.
Howard talked about May's life growing up and how her father would beat her just because she was born a girl. She said that it was a tough life. Howard gave her some more plugs for her book and said that it was a great looking book. He said he took his copy home and checked it out. He said it makes for a great coffee table book.
Howard had Sour Shoes on the phone again doing his Paul McCartney impression. He sang a little to her and then went into a baby voice that was kind of creepy. Howard told him to get off his phone.
Artie was checking out May's book and said that there were some pictures of a young May in there. They had some pictures of Julian in the book as well. She said that he was 10 at the time those pictures were taken.
Howard gave May some plugs and said that you can find out where she'll be signing books at MayPang.com. She gave Howard some Feng Shui jewelry that she makes. Artie was still checking out the book so he was showing Howard some of the pictures that he was finding in there.
Howard gave her some more plugs for her book and asked a couple more questions about what it was like to date John. He told her that he'll try to find her another man sometime soon. She thanked him for that. Artie was still looking at the pictures and showing them to Howard. Howard said that he enjoyed the book too and he sees that Artie is enjoying it too. Howard said that he likes the book because he doesn't have to read, he can just look at the pictures. Howard wrapped up and went to break a short time later.
Howard said that John would have been great on Dancing with the Stars too. The guys spent some time talking about Lennon and McCartney's careers. Artie asked which one had the better career. Howard said that it was Lennon. Robin laughed and said she thought that Paul had the better career.
Artie said that he really wanted to know who had it better in their life. Howard figured that was Paul. He said that he seemed to have a great wife and a good life going back then.
Howard said that the best thing about the Beatles break up was the great music that George Harrison came out with. He said that he never really got those songs put on the Beatles albums.
Howard asked the guys some questions and asked Fred to play one of their more obscure songs. Fred said it wasn't in their system though. He found some of the stuff Howard wanted to hear and played through some of that. Howard said that George Harrison had some great stuff but there were a few songs that he could have left out of those albums.
Howard said that Jeff the Drunk is upset that Bubba won't have him on the show until Artie calls him. He played a clip of Jeff leaving a voice mail asking Gary to e-mail Brent to ask him to put him back on the show. Howard said that they're torturing Jeff with that. Robin said she loves it.
Steve got back to his news after that and said that they have a story about Paris Hilton's new BFF show on MTV and Benjy Bronk is number 9 on the list right now. You can vote for him at ParisBFF.com (under BenjyBenjy).
Steve said that they have a story about Bob Levy hitting Danny Bonaduce back stage at a celebrity fight that he was at. They'll have more on that today. He also got in some plugs for Jackie the Joke Man's show and Riley Martin's shows that air tonight on Howard 101.
Howard went to Jon Hein with his Wrap Up Show preview. Jon ran down the stuff they were going to cover like Robin's new assistant who hadn't been introduced to anyone. Howard still wants to talk to her. Jason came in and told Howard about a new juice that Robin is drinking that her assistant brought up. He said that she gets very excited about that stuff for Robin. He said that he doesn't know her well enough yet to say much else about her. Howard asked Robin if they can follow her around for just one day. Robin quickly said ''No!''
Jeff the Drunk called in and sounded sad to the guys so they goofed on him about that a little bit. Artie was doing his impression of him and goofing on him about the whole Bubba thing.
Howard asked Jeff why he's so upset about not being able to call into Bubba's show. Jeff said he's not that upset. Howard told him that Artie isn't going to make that call to the show. Ronnie said that he's not wanted on that show and they don't want him calling in. They're glad that Artie isn't calling in. Ronnie told him he's a waste and an asshole and everyone is sick of him already. Jeff said a couple of Fuck you's to Ronnie over that. Howard told Jeff he's not sick of him. Jeff thanked him for that.
Howard asked Robin if her assistant ever has to call Jim or anything like that. Robin said she doesn't. She wasn't giving up many details on what she does for her. Howard kept digging though. Fred was doing his Jim impression and goofing around with that whole thing.
Howard asked who the last assistant was. Robin said that her last assistant was this woman Jackie who was with her for years. Howard thought that Carrie was her assistant but Robin said that she was just her news assistant there at SIRIUS, not a personal assistant.
Fred was sounding more and more like himself doing those Jim impressions so Robin told him that. Fred started to laugh his ass off when he heard that. Artie said that he was kind of giving up on the impression now.
Howard spent a few more minutes talking to Robin about her assistant but she wasn't giving up much info on her. She said that she wasn't sure how many hours she puts in every day or anything like that. Robin said that she'll probably work with her from 11 to 4 today. She said that this is just an introductory period though.
Robin is on a fast right now so she has a lot of juices and stuff coming in and the assistant had to take care of that one day.
Sal came in and said that Stacy introduced herself as ''RQ's assistant'' in the elevator one day. Robin got a laugh out of that. The guys had some fun goofing around with that stuff. Sal said that Stacy was telling him about all of the fan mail she gets and how she was taking care of that. Robin didn't even know about that. She said that's why she needs an assistant. Robin said that she's going to have a Myspace page soon too. She said that she has some advisors working with her and they want her to have a Myspace page so she's going to do that. She's doing it reluctantly though.
Howard asked how Robin interviewed her assistant. She said she did it at a restaurant. She came highly recommended and she liked her right away so she hired her. She said that they got to know each other there and she filled her in on the scope of her work.
Howard asked Robin a bunch of questions about what kind of work she's going to be doing for her and how she set her up. She said that she won't be making her drinks or anything like that. Howard said that it's good for her to be doing this.
Howard took a call from a guy who was asking for some advice on his sex life. He said that he's had some crazy sex with her and he'd like to know if he should keep it going really often. Howard said that he and Beth have a regular sex life but if he was only getting it about once a month, he'd give up and get out of that relationship. He said that he'd let it go about a year if he was only having sex about once a month.
Howard said that if he's not going to have it more than once a month, that's not enough. He said that even if she was licking his balls and even his taint once a month, he'd be out of there. The caller said that he's just getting it once a month but it's like porn sex when they do have it.
Howard told the guy that sex is too important for him and he should talk to this broad about it and let her know that it's not enough.
Howard took another call from a guy who asked why Robin would need a news assistant. Robin said she doesn't need one. That person is no longer there. She told the guy she doesn't need him either. She ended up calling the guy an asshole even though he was just asking some questions. She said that she was trying to supplement her personal assistant with this news assistant and that didn't work out.
Howard talked about how he needs people around him too so he knows what that's like. He even has someone walk him to his psychiatrist appointments. He said he was in shock when he saw that Robin had opened up this new group known as GNO (Girls Night Out.) He said he loves Anne Marie and the other friends she has in the group. He said he doesn't like them as a group though.
Howard asked if anyone has approached Robin and asked to be in GNO. Robin said that you don't ask, you are invited out and the rest of the group has to approve. Howard said that there have to be people out there who really want to be in the group. Robin said that anyone can have veto power in the group so it has to be unanimous. Howard and Artie were goofing around making up a vote that might happen with the girls.
Howard said that most of the women are single, but if Leslie Barbara gets in, that might change things. He was afraid that she might throw things off. Robin said that her friend Sheila has been living with a man for a long time now and she's just about married. Artie suggested that Martina Navratilova be invited to join the club.
Robin asked Robin if she'd ever let her assistant join the group. She said that she doesn't know, she just met her. Howard continued to goof on Robin and said that they could have a coat of arms that read ''Our Shit Does Not Stink.''
Howard asked if the girls can get kicked out of the group. Robin said that it would have to be a group decision but no one has been kicked out yet. She said that she'd even be okay with it if she got kicked out. Artie sarcastically asked what the chances are that Lisa Orband would get annoying and get kicked out. He said he was just kidding about that, he likes Lisa.
Jon Hein got back to his Wrap Up Show preview. He ran down a few more things that they'd be covering today. He had a bunch of subjects that he ran through.
Robin eventually moved on to her news and read a story about Paul McCartney and Heather Mills' divorce settlement. Paul didn't have to give the biggest pay out compared to a bunch of other people. Other guys like Neil Diamond had to pay out 3 times as much. She ran through a list of other people who had to pay really big money to their wives.
Robin read a story about Jim Carrey writing a book about depression and how he gets over it. He's apparently anti-drug. That led to Artie talking about how he's very pro-drug himself. Robin read another story about Madonna possibly splitting from her husband Guy Ritchie. She had another story about a woman on a plane who had a man masturbating next to her on a flight and ended up with semen in her hair.
Howard mentioned that he saw Jillian Barberie in a new Nutrisystem commercial and she looked really good. He said that if he hadn't met Beth he would be banging Jillian. He would have banged her real hard too. He said that she would have had all 3 inches of him in her.
Howard offered his sandwich to Artie but Artie turned it down. Earlier he had said he wanted to try and eat it but he wasn't hungry at that point. Robin asked him if he's still eating the chicken and rice. He said he's done with that now. Howard was too, that's why he had this new turkey sandwich.
Artie said that the turkey makes him sleepy. Howard said that he and Artie just started an eating club and to join you just have to order a turkey sandwich.
Robin brought up a story about a guy who was injured at a strip club when a high heel hit him in the eye. Howard said that he doesn't like the acrobatics that girls do at the clubs. He said that they're not sexy doing it. He suggested that the girls just be girls and stop with the tricks.
Robin read through some more stories. She had one about Elliot Spitzer. She had one about Matt Lauer being the next guy to be roasted at the Friar's Club. Artie was wondering about that and why anyone would roast that guy.
Howard played some of Sal's interviews with women about the Elliot Spitzer controversy. Robin got back to her news and read some more stories about the Elliot Spitzer scandal. She had some quotes from the new New York governor that she played. Howard made up some quotes of his own that he'd like to hear the guy saying. He said that it would be great if that guy was insane and just started saying that the only reason he was there was because of pussy. He spent a few minutes making up some more stuff like that.
Howard played the bit that Sal and Richard created for this new Governor David Patterson. He said that the real guy sounds nothing like the impression that Sal was doing in that bit.
Robin read through some more stories and played some more audio clips. She talked about John McCain's run for President. She had some Barack Obama news and played some clips of him defending himself over the preacher controversy.
Robin had a story about Ashton Kutcher's new TV show. She had some clips of him talking about the show which bored Howard so much he bailed out on them just seconds in. Robin moved on to some Dancing with the Stars audio clips. Howard said that Adam took it pretty hard from the judges. They talked about how there was no sexuality between Adam and his partner either. He's teamed up with a really hot chick but Howard said there was nothing going on between them from what he could see.
Robin had some clips of Steve Gutenberg talking about what a dream come true this was to be on the show. Howard said that's bullshit because this is actually the end of the road for some of the people on that show.
Robin brought up a story about Charlize Theron. Howard said that he still thinks that she's sexy. He said that she's still looking good these days. Robin had some clips of her talking about the new movie she's in. She also had some clips of Jaime Presley talking about the voice she did for ''Horton Hears a Who.'' Howard played through some of that but she went on and on about how she picked out the Southern dialect she did. Howard said he wishes that he could get a cartoon voice. He has a couple that he could do and demonstrated them. He went through a couple of those as Robin was wrapping up her news. They ended the show around 10:45am.
Gary talked about how Artie had heard about this thing that's made for geriatrics which prints out e-mail automatically. Artie asked Teddy why he didn't have one like that so Teddy told him that it's got a monthly charge and then there are other things like ''printer maintenance'' that he has to worry about. Gary asked Teddy why he'd be so worried about something like that.
Teddy said that he has to worry about it because he can't get over to Artie's apartment that often to make sure it has paper and ink in it to print out. He said that it's really not made for printing out a ton of stuff. He said that he'll be getting a ton of e-mail and then he'll run out of paper and something won't get printed and Artie will freak out.
Teddy said that he'd have to use that one printer and not something that you can just go out and buy in a store. He said that when his agents find out he's got it he's going to get a ton of e-mail and paper will end up on the floor and stuff.
Jon asked Teddy what he does now. Teddy said that he prints out his mail and he gives it to him at work. He only shows him what he needs to see and tells him about what else he has. Gary pointed out that Teddy is Artie's assistant but most people will send stuff to him instead so he has to forward all of that to Teddy who can then forward it to Artie. Gary said that people there will ask him to ask Artie about stuff so he has to tell them to contact Teddy.
Gary wondered why Artie can't just use his computer instead of getting this e-mail machine that they're talking about. He said that checking mail is very simple. Teddy said that Artie took his last computer and threw it across his apartment so it's broken. Its been that way since they were at K-Rock.
Teddy said that he's kind of teaching Artie how to text so maybe he'll be able to figure out how to e-mail. Jim McClure said that a friend of his just sent over a new Blackberry for Artie but he's not sure if he'll be able to figure that out.
Jon asked Gary how long he thinks Teddy would last as Robin's assistant. Gary said he'd last about 5 minutes. Teddy said that if he was her assistant, he wouldn't be working there as well. Gary said he still doesn't think that he'd last there. That led to Gary talking about how something about Robin got leaked on the air about her and now the person who leaked that has been banned from her life forever. He had to be vague about that so that person wouldn't know.
Gary talked about meeting Robin's new assistant and how she had come into his office with a box of chocolates for him from Robin but she didn't even say what she was doing there or how long she was going to be there. Gary said that a bunch of guys told him that he had to do a wrap about that girl because of the way she just showed up there without an explanation. Gary said that it is kind of weird how she just materialized there.
Jon asked Gary to talk about some of the other assistants that Robin has had. Gary said that he never met this girl Jackie that she was talking about earlier. He said she had another one that was there one day and gone the next without an explanation. IT was like she just fell through a trap door and disappeared forever.
Gary said that he doesn't know what the assistant does and Teddy said he'd love to know what she's up to that she needs an assistant for. Gary said that she kind of explained what that was about but he didn't grasp all of what she was saying. He said that he wished she was there so he could ask her about some of that.
Gary said that he doesn't know what Robin does when she leaves for the day. He said that he'd love to know what it is. Jon said that maybe she can call in and talk about it. Gary said that she waved an arm dissmissingly earlier to blow them off.
Jon took a call from a guy who asked if this is a way for Robin to set herself up for her future after Howard retires. Gary said he's not sure what she's working on. The caller said she did mention that Myspace page she's got in the works. Gary said that was strange and he thinks that Howard let it go too easy. He said he'd like to know who it is that's asking her for pictures for her Myspace page. Howard didn't ask. Gary said that Myspace is for either getting laid for doing it for business.
Gary said that he's been told he needs a Myspace page but he doesn't know why, he has the show to promote stuff that he does. He said that he thinks that Robin must have a good reason to put that page up there though. He said that maybe something is in the works for a new show or something like that. Benjy said that he was thinking that she was doing it to find a relationship or something. Gary didn't think that made much sense though. He thinks that she might need it to sell something. What she's selling they don't know yet.
Gary said that he had a Facebook page but he turned it off to the world because it was too annoying. Benjy said that he'd like to have a Myspace page. Teddy said that everyone on the show has about 30 of them. They're all fake though.
Another caller thinks that it sounds like Teddy is too worried about having to clean up after Artie and that's why he doesn't want him to have that e-mail machine. Teddy said that if he could get over to his apartment more often it wouldn't be a problem. Gary told him that he should just want to help his boss out in any way he can.
Jon asked Teddy if he likes being Artie's assistant. He said that he likes the stuff they do on the road, he's not a big fan of the stuff he has to do during the week. He said that he'd like to know about stuff in advance and not have surprises thrown on him at the last minute. He said that's what happens now. He said that lately they've just been text messaging so he lets Artie do what he wants.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that he wanted to know about the earmuffs on Robin's assistant. Gary said that they'll have to ask her about that. Benjy wears a hat all the time and he said that he think that maybe she wears them because she gets cold up there, that's why he wears his hat all the time. That and he's trying to look cool.
The caller told Gary what to expect over in the Middle East when he goes over there with Artie to perform in the USO show they're doing. He went on and on about what kind of guards they were going to have an stuff like that. Gary said that he feels that he'll be pretty safe over there based on who has gone over in the past and the fact that no one has ever been injured.
Jon took another call but the guy wasn't there. Frequent caller Syrus called in next and said that he's noticed that Howard always mentions race when he takes a call. He said that he mentioned that all of Robins' assistants have been black and said ''hmmm'' after that. He said that he really makes a big deal out of their race. Gary said that he's not sure about that. Syrus said that he should just be Syrus and Howard shouldn't ask him if he's black when he calls in. Gary said that's just Howard's way of prodding people and getting more information out of them.
Jon took another call from a guy who said he was thinking about how Robin seems to be kind of like Merryl Streep's character in The Devil Wears Prada. That got the guys talking about that a little bit and how Robin has had times in her life when she may have been a little out of her mind. Gary told one story about an intern that worked with Robin for a year and thought she was getting really close to her. ON her last day she went to say bye to Robin and Robin just said a quick goodbye and the intern ended up breaking down crying that Robin didn't seem to care that much about her.
Benjy said that he started out as an intern for Robin and he had to deal with her all the time. He said that she was nice and pleasant to him though. Gary said that she had gotten better by that time. He said that there other times when Robin would freak out and yell at the interns. He said that she once went off on Mitch the intern about not having any coffee there. There was another story where she was running around looking for an umbrella and someone gave up his personal umbrella just to make her stop.
Teddy said that Artie used to quote that movie ''The Devil Wears Prada'' when he was first starting out with him. He said that he tried to point out to Artie that her assistant ended up quitting at the end of the movie.
Jon took another call from a guy who said he's been listening to the show for about 10 years now. He was listening in some markets where they were taken off the air a few times. He said that he was glad that he had him back now on SIRIUS. Benjy pointed out that they didn't bother asking this gentleman what race he was when he called in. He thought that Syrus might be interested in that. Gary tried to figure out why Benjy was pointing that out with this guy. It turns out the guy was white but had an accent that made him sound like he might not be. The guy went on to say that people tell him he looks like that guy Paul Wall. The guys said that he sounds kind of like him too.
Gary asked the guy if he thinks that he's in the minority because he really thinks that he is. The caller said that he's not and there are a lot of people who really don't like Robin on the show. Then he said that he really doesn't dislike her. Gary said that's right, he hates her. The guy went on to compare Robin to the character Connie in the Godfather movies. She was nice in the first one but by the third one she was killing people.
The guy said that Robin used to sit back and just let Howard do his thing but now she's turning into the harder person on the show and she's taking up the whole show for herself. He said that she always has something to say.
As the caller was going off on Robin Gregg from Howard TV said that some people's opinions on the show are just crazy. Jon thanked the guy for the call and asked the guys if they think that the guy is right about that stuff. Benjy said that he thinks it's fun when Robin challenges Howard on the show. Jon asked him about the way Robin was asking Howard about why he never touches the girls on the show. Benjy said he found that to be a really interesting part of the show.
Gary said that he had some insight into the show to share. He said that the time he had that party out at his house, and Howard left early, he told Robin that she should bring that up on the air again and she went on and on and kept needling him until he talked about it. IT made it all that much better. Jon said that they had to go to break after that.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that he had something for Gary. He said that he's never been moved enough to call until today. He He said that he's been a fan of the show for a long time but he's a fan for Howard. He said that he will listen until they're off the air but he thinks that Robin has gotten much more annoying over the past 3 or 4 years. He said that she seems to be trying to be a comedienne on the show and he can see why people think that she's so annoying.
Gary asked the caller how he can listen to the show and not like the show as a whole thing and not just because of Howard. The guy said that in general he still loves the show but he thinks that she has gotten more annoying over time. He said that she used to be the voice of reason but no more. He said that she tries to tell jokes and she's just not funny. Gary asked for some examples of that so the guy told him about how she'll jump in on a conversation, like when Howard does his Kennedy impression, and she'll throw in a line that just isn't funny.
Jon said he can see that he made his point pretty well but he didn't really agree with it. He asked Gary if he thinks that she's really changed. Gary said that she kind of did get dirtier when they got there to SIRIUS but other than that, she hasn't changed all that much.
Jon took a call from a woman who said that she thinks that Robin is just showing that she's confident on the show. She said that Robin gets pounded on and she just laughs it off and she's very strong on the show and she loves it. She doesn't agree with what those two callers had said about her.
Jon took another call from a guy who said that he's been listening to the show for years and he's heard from a lot of people who think that Robin is not likeable anymore. He said that if they put a poll up on the site they'd find that Robin wasn't all that interesting anymore. She'd be rated the lowest with an approval rating if they did something like that.
Jason came in and said that he doesn't think that Robin is that bad and he will work on getting a poll put up on the web site about that. Jason said he'll talk to their web guy and see what they can do.
Jon took another call from a guy who brought up the stuff that Gary was talking about before with the way Robin treated people in the past. He said that it seems that she's not very nice. Gary said that was back when her head was kind of messed up and she wasn't even happy with herself at the time.
Jason said that Robin is great and he doesn't think that she has any problems at all other than maybe not remembering people's names. The guys were goofing on him about being in the Girls Night Out club so he said that they're all just jealous. Jon quickly said that they're not though.
Gary said that he doesn't think that Robin is a detriment to the show at all. Jason said he's heard from some fans who think that she's not all that great so he does hear from a lot of fans about the stuff that those guys were saying earlier.
Gary said that he was telling someone the other day about how there is a chemistry with Howard and Robin and the rest of the guys that just works. That can't be reproduced even though so many people have tried with morning radio shows. Jason said that she does have her quirks but that's just something that they deal with there and it becomes part of the show.
Gary said that a lot of the guys there are bummed out that he hasn't been going to strip clubs and stuff lately. He said that JD's head is about to explode because he won't throw those parties that he used to throw.
The guys talked about how Howard has changed and how he feels weird having young girls taking their clothes off. He said that they've gone down that road a few times and he feels weird about it sometimes. Jason said that he thinks that Howard is less horny than he used to be. He's not masturbating as much as he used to, he and Beth aren't having sex as often as they used to and maybe he's settling down a little bit. He's not a 30 year old guy anymore. He said that his testosterone level has probably dropped over the past 10 years or so.
A caller asked about the bachelor party that they were going to throw. Gary said that they need a set date for the wedding first and then they'll set that up. He predicted that Howard will stay for about 45 minutes and leave.
Gary talked about some of the old Scores trips that they'd make and how they'd go there right after the show and party for hours and hours.
Jon took a call from a woman who said that she thinks that Robin does interrupt Howard too much on the show. She said that Howard just caves in when she talks on the show. Benjy asked her if she thinks that her testosterone level has dropped in the past 10 years. Everyone got a laugh out of that.
The guys goofed on Jason a little more about being in the Girls Night Out group. Jason said that he's very proud to be in that group.
Jon played a clip of May and Howard talking about John Lennon and how John told her that he wished that he had a kid with her.
After the clip the guys talked about what a big influence John Lennon was in Howard's life. He still is to a certain extent. Gary said that he thinks that from what he can gather about John, he would probably have gotten Howard's show and he probably would have been into it if he was still alive.
Jon said that it seems that it could have been up his alley but Yoko kind of swings a mean bat and may have kept him from doing the show.
The guys talked about some of the other things that May Pang talked about during her interview. Gary said that he read a book about the Beatles about a year ago and they painted him as being not a nice guy. He said that the guy really did write some great songs that had social commentary in them while Paul wrote the stuff that was kind of just fun and goofy stuff.
Gary asked what kind of quality of a record John would be putting out today if he was still around. They spent a short time talking about what he might have put out. That led to Gary telling a story about something they did on Saturday Night Live early on where they offered The Beatles some money to come on the show and get back together. The story said that John and Paul were actually together that night and almost went down to collect that check that night.
The guys talked about some of the other songs that the guys in the Beatles put out and how great some of it was. They were also talking about how much of an icon Lennon really was and how no one is celebrating George Harrison the way they do with Lennon.
Jason said that he went bowling with Scott one time and he wasn't nearly as good as they expected him to be. He bowled 3 games that night and didn't break 200 in any of them. Scott blamed it on the ball he was using since it wasn't his personal ball. Gary said that sounds like a legitimate excuse to him. Jason didn't think it was a good excuse at all.
Jon took another call from a guy who went off on Robin and said that she's really got to stop interrupting the show. He thins that they should do a lie detector test to find out if they're all telling the truth. They spent another minute on that as they were wrapping up the show which was coming to an end quickly.
Howard started off the show talking about all the fun they were going to have this morning. He said that he pounced out of bed this morning to be there to entertain everyone. then he said he was done and ready to go home a second later. Artie asked if he was serious and Fred played a door opening and closing sound as if he walked out.
Howard said that he was reading about this new New York governor and how he's been able to get some hot chicks even though he's blind. He said that he was telling JD that he must be able to see that anyone can get chicks if that guy can.
Howard said this guy David Patterson has been talking about everything that he was up to so the press doesn't go digging into everything about him. He's been talking about how his wife cheated on him and he went out and cheated on her. He's telling everyone about how he had revenge sex with one chick and then went out with a bunch of others as well.
Howard said that he thinks that Patterson's wife is hot. He's got some pictures of some other women that he was with and they weren't as hot.
Howard said that some of the women he was with had jobs with him too. He said that one of the women actually ended up working for Elliot Spitzer. Howard said that there's nothing worse than messing around with someone at work and then it all fizzles. You still have to work with that person and it really complicates everything.
Howard read another e-mail from someone who said he was too hard on Jessica Hahn yesterday. He thought he was fine with the questions though. There was some feedback about May Pang that he read through as well. Some people wrote in about her and John Lennon's relationship.
Artie said he had a weird moment with May Pang. He said that she gave him her book and he looked through it on the air. He liked it and she didn't ask for it back so he assumed that it was a free copy for him. He was walking out of the studio during the break and she asked him to come over. She asked to sign the book for him and she was very aggressive about it. She opened it up to sign it and said that she had already signed it to someone else and she'd send him another one.
Artie thinks that May just wanted the book back and acted out that scene to get her book back. He said that he thinks that she really wanted to sign the book but it was really awkward the way she found the name in the book. Howard said he was sorry that he got turned down that way. That was after she had turned him down sexually during the interview. Artie said that he was shot down during that interview.
Howard said that Fred messed up trying to find a George Harrison song during the show yesterday. It turned out to be the wrong name that he was looking for. Howard read mail about that and about some other stuff like Artie and his bookie. One writer said that Artie shouldn't have let his bookie off the hook for all the money that he owed him. Artie said he didn't let him off the hook, he went to collect his money and the guy didn't have it.
Howard said that someone wrote in about a conversation they had about guys who fuck chicks with another guy in the room. Howard had said that guys like that might be gay. Howard said that he's done stuff in a room with other people around but he doesn't have a guy standing there watching him. Artie had a load shot on him one time when a guy was banging a chick near him so maybe he was referring to that.
Jessica Hahn called in and said that she didn't think that Howard was mean to her yesterday at all. She told Howard that he's the greatest and she always turns to them when she has bad things happen to her in her life. Howard asked her if she thinks that Artie is an ass pirate. She doesn't think that at all.
Howard said that Artie has been getting a lot of mail and women want him but he seems to be too picky. They talked about how he turned Jessica down for a hand job one time. He said he didn't turn her down and she was the one who didn't show up.
Howard let Jessica go and then read some mail about Richard getting drunk at the Iron Maiden concert he went to last week. Robin said that he claims to be just drinking one night a week and just having 2 drinks.
Howard talked about Richard getting shit faced drunk at this Iron Maiden show. Richard came in and said that he didn't drink anything on Saturday, it was just on Friday night. He said that he wasn't even that blasted that night. Howard asked how many drinks he had. He said it was about 8 beers and a few gin and Red Bulls.
Howard goofed on Richard's grammar and said he doesn't know where he went to school but he must have been bare foot when he went there.
Howard let Richard go and brought up this chick that was with Elliot Spitzer. He said that Joe Francis, who owns Girls Gone Wild, has gone out and offered her a million bucks to do a Girls Gone Wild feature. Howard said that the time to pounce is now and no one is going to care about her in 3 weeks. He said that the time to make a deal is now.
Howard said that Joe was talking to a reporter and he might already have video of this girl. It turns out she was hanging out with them when she was 18 years old and the reporter was right. Joe took back the offer for the million and said that they have her when she was way hotter, at 18. He went on to insult her in his comments. They have a week's worth of footage of her now.
Howard said that they have some pictures of Patrick Swayze smoking a cigarette while he's trying to battle cancer. Howard said he doesn't see a problem with that if he's as near death as they're saying he might be.
Howard read an article about Tiger Woods buying a house in the Hamptons yesterday but it turns out that the story wasn't true at all. Tiger isn't buying that house at all and the sellers are saying that he never even looked at the house.
Howard saw a picture of Jennifer Aniston in the paper today and she was in a bikini. He said that he doesn't know why but she just turns him off even though she's got a great body. He said that he read that she's working on the movie based on the book ''Marley and Me'' and he just doesn't see her and Owen Wilson in the parts in that book that he loved.
Howard said that Barack Obama went out and made a speech where he talked about this preacher friend of his and didn't really denounce him the way he should have. Artie said the guy is a great speaker and he almost had him convinced by the end of it that he was a great guy. Howard and the guys talked about that preacher and how he doesn't seem to be a very loving Christian.
Gary said that Danny was fighting some radio guys in Philly and Levy was there hanging out with Kidd Chris and some other people there. Howard said that he saw the video and Bob just smacked Danny in the face with an open hand. He said he knows that Bob used to wrestle so he could do that acting it out.
Howard said that Bob gives Danny a little smack and then asks Bob to smack him again and his body guards are there and take Bob down when he goes to smack him again. Gary told Howard that it looked like Bob had backed down a little bit in the video but the guards that were there were huge.
They spent a few minutes talking about that video and Gary said that it looked real to him. He rewound it a few times to see what it looked like. Artie said that Levy is a guy who will fight. Howard played the video and watched it. Artie said that was the fakest thing he had ever seen in his life. He said that the camera angle was just right and it looked fake to him. Robin thought it was a set up as well.
Artie said that he loves Bob but he's not sure what he's trying to do there. Howard said that if Danny really got smacked, he probably would have went after Bob himself.
Matt was talking about how real Howard's movie made the business seem with those lame program directors. Matt went into a Rick Dees impression and goofed on him a little bit. Howard asked him to do the WNnnnnnBC announcing thing for him. Fred found a song for him that was like something like they'd have on WNBC back in the 80s.
Matt asked what happened to Imus because he seems to have a speech impediment. Howard said he's always had that but he didn't talk that much when he was on NBC but now he does. The guy said that he used to work at Z-100 there in New York and someone would always be there yelling out Howard's name if he was out making appearances.
Howard asked Matt something about reading commercials and he went on and on talking about a bunch of nonsense. Howard said he had no clue what he was going for there. Matt said he thought that Howard had hung up on him at that point.
Howard tried to get Matt to do his talk up for a song. He was having some trouble hearing the song but he did okay with the talk up. Howard ended up talking about American Idol and Dancing with the Stars while Matt was on the phone. Matt said that the whole Ryan Seacrest thing really pisses him off. Howard figured that he wanted to be that guy but Matt said that he could never be that milk toast and do a show like that.
Matt told Howard that he's a radio mechanic and he knows how to milk a few minutes and build up the time spent listening. He said that Howard is entertaining and he's not all about poo-poo humor.
Matt said that he was kind of upset about the way he hired Bubba the Love Sponge. He said he was at a convention years ago and saw Bubba accepting an award for Howard and he took the award and wiped his ass with it. He said that he was defending Howard and wondering why Bubba would do something like that to Howard.
Howard said that he doesn't remember that incident and really didn't know about Bubba until he was on in New Haven. He said Bubba hates that he says that but it's true. Robin remembered that ass wiping thing but she didn't remember that it was Bubba.
Howard said that Bubba came clean to him when they met and he told him about the stuff he did. He didn't take offense to that and they were actually kind of funny. He said that Bubba said that he was just trying to make a name for himself and that's why he was doing that stuff. He and Bubba got along after that meeting and that's why they hired him there.
Howard said the reason that they were talking about Matt yesterday is because he owns Johnny Carson's tonight show couch. Matt said that he picked that up at an auction years ago. He said he would have gone even higher to buy it. Howard asked him if people thought he was out of his mind buying it. He said that they didn't and he actually outbid Doc Severenson. He said that he really did it just because he loved Johnny Carson.
Howard asked where the couch was stored all these years. He said he kept it in his garage. He said that he'd bring it out and use it to do interviews in his back yard. He said that he got a call from Marty Ingels who was supposed to be on Carson one year. He ended up passing out back stage when he heard his name mentioned on the air and didn't appear. He was banned from the show because of that.
Matt said that the couch is in great shape and in a crate that says Tonight Show on it. Matt asked Howard what he thought about Carson as an interviewer. Howard said that he wasn't a great interviewer, he did have some great guests though. Howard thought he was pretty mediocre as an interviewer and he'd give comedian's good set ups for their bits but he wasn't that great.
Matt said that he wasn't sure how to disagree with Howard and his lovely sidekick. Howard said that he respects Carson's career because he did last so long. He said that he was charming on the air but he really wasn't a great interviewer. He doesn't think he was talentless but he was kind of mean spirited. Howard said that some would say the same about him but he doesn't have the disdain for people that Carson did. He said he wouldn't let comedians sit on the couch if they didn't do well. He said that was an incredibly mean thing to do.
Matt said that he thought he was a great interviewer and had to disagree. Howard asked Matt, who he was calling ''Magic'' where the name came from. Matt told him about how he came up with the name and how it just stuck. Howard asked him about that voice he has and how he came up with that. Matt said that it's just his voice and he's not putting on something phony. Howard told him that he does have a good radio voice. He said his diction is perfect and he sounds like an announcer.
Howard asked Matt if he's getting laid. Matt said that in the other room is Morton Downey Jr.'s widow is in the other room. He said that she's still hot too. She was 33 years his junior so she wasn't as old as he was. Howard asked if they talk about Morton and if she loved him or not. He got her to come to the phone a minute later so Howard could talk to her.
Howard asked Laurie if she loved Morton for real. She said that she really did adore him. She said she had a daughter with him and she's now 14 and just like him. She said she really did love him. Howard asked her if Magic Matt is a great guy too. She said that he really is. Howard asked her how long she's been with him. She said they've been together for about a year but they've known each other for about 8 years. Howard let her go a short time later.
Matt got back on the phone and said that he'd love to be able to give up his good looks to have a little bit of success like Howard has. He said that he has to sell this couch of his because he needs the money.
Howard said that Matt is selling Johnny Carson's couch and he sees that there's a bid of like $99,000. Matt said that he got no bids on that thing because he started it out so high. He said they have a swivel table and you can find them on ebay.com. Matt also got in a plug for his web site MrCigar.com.
Howard let Matt go and said that maybe they should buy the couch and do nasty things on it. He said he had to go to break so they didn't get too far behind.
Howard told Arlen how screwed up the economy is getting at this point and how the dollar is worth so little that Jason, who is going over to Amsterdam for his bachelor party, is worried about it because some people aren't even accepting the dollar. Howard asked Arlen about what he feels about this President Bush.
Arlen said that right now it's hard to judge him now, in the future we may look back on him and see that he was a great President. He said that has happened with other Presidents that weren't looked at as very smart.
Howard asked Senator Specter about the kind of money senators make and how they end up millionaires when they get out of office. He didn't really have a straight answer for that.
Howard brought up this new book (Never Give In: Battling Cancer in the Senate) that Specter has out about his battle with cancer. Arlen talked about how tough the chemotherapy was. He said that he kept working through it and that's what people have to do. He said that's basically what he talks about in the book.
Howard read that Arlen was misdiagnosed with a brain tumor back in 1993 and he was given 3-6 weeks to live. Arlen said that he was in a state of shock at that time. He said that they were about to celebrate his anniversary so the guy told him to just go have a good time. They took the tumor out a week later and they found that it wasn't a deadly tumor. He said that the best thing to do is get a second opinion when you get diagnosed with something like that.
Howard asked if he ever thought about suing the doctor. Arlen said that every day that he's alive now is a day that he might not have had so he doesn't bother with trying to sue doctors who misdiagnosed him.
Howard brought up Elliot Spitzer and asked him if he ever thought about doing something like that. Arlen said that he wouldn't do something like that. He got back to the story about the doctor who misdiagnosed him and said that he didn't accept what he said and thought he was nutty for telling him to go out and have a good time.
Howard asked Arlen more about what he thinks about Spitzer and if he should have stayed in office. Arlen said that all depends on whether or not he could function as Governor. He said he was on NPR recently talking about that. He said that he was saying that he should think it over before he made that decision. His wife wanted him to stay in office so maybe he should have stayed on. If he couldn't function as Governor then he should resign. He didn't think that he looked it over enough before making that decision.
Howard said that all men are going to be attracted to younger women. Arlen agreed and said that you have to avoid the temptation. He said that he is a red blooded American so he's been tempted but he's married and has been married for 55 years. He said that you have to think about the consequences before you act on something like that.
Howard got back to the health issues with Arlen and said that he was misdiagnosed with Lou Gehrig's disease. He asked how that happens. Arlen said that he had a pain in his left arm and they gave him a test that told him he had the Lou Gehrig's disease. Then they saw that he wasn't getting any more symptoms a few weeks later and the doctor told him that it could be related to a mild case of Polio when he was a child. Arlen wondered why they don't just tell the patient what else it could be when they make the diagnosis.
Howard said that this is a recurring thing with him and he doesn't understand why doctors are making mistakes like that. Arlen said that he writes about all of that in the book and explains what he thinks about all of what was going on. He said that it just shows that you should go out and get a second opinion.
Howard said that he got a good vibe off of him about being a good father. Arlen said that he was a good father to his two sons. He said that he had a very good father who raised him and he thinks that he was a good father himself.
Howard asked Arlen about the XM/SIRIUS merger and said that he has lost faith in the government over this. Arlen told him he probably never had any faith in the government. Howard said that he thinks that some of the people in government care and he thought that people really cared about this kind of stuff. He said that it's not a tough thing to rule on and he believes that people are being paid off left and right by lobbyists. He said that the two companies are bleeding financially and the government doesn't seem to care.
Howard told Arlen that something is foul here and nobody cares. He said he's disgusted and he knows that it's B.S. Arlen asked if he wanted a response on that. Of course he did.
Arlen said that the core problem is that there is no feeling of urgency with that decision. He said that he doesn't believe that anyone is being paid off though. He said that there is a complex question there about the merger being anticompetitive. He said that there are similar quality entertainment products out there but they really don't need to spend months on this. He said that it has taken a long time but they are going to have a decision by the end of the month from what he knows. Howard said that they didn't spend this much time on oil company mergers.
Robin asked why they have such a sense of urgency on an oil company merger and not this one. Arlen said that there is no sense of urgency about anything in government. He said that cancer could be cured if there was more of a sense of urgency about that. He said that billions of dollars are being spent on research and there still isn't a cure. Arlen said that he talks about all of that stuff in his book.
Howard said that he feels like this country is going downhill and we're in big trouble. Arlen said that he doesn't feel that way at all and the country is still very strong. He told Howard about some of the people he deals with and how tough they are doing their jobs. Howard asked him about the real working man and if they can really keep working when they go through chemotherapy like he did. Arlen said that he went through a lot of battles and didn't miss a day of work.
Howard asked Arlen if he wants to work the rest of his life. He said that he will work as long as he can as long as he's at the top of his game. He said that he had a picture of him with President Bush when he had no hair. Howard said that Robin liked him with no hair. Robin said that he looked good with no hair.
Howard said that Arlen looked really different with no hair. He asked him if he addresses that in his book. He said that he does address all of that and how he thought he looked like hell when he was going through the chemo. He said that he just went to work looking like that and decided not to wear a hair piece or anything like that.
Howard said that when someone has cancer and doesn't look great, you have to think that people are going to be talking about you behind your back. Arlen said that he speculates about what Bush was thinking in that picture with him and he thinks that he was probably wanting to get away from him just in case cancer is contagious. He said that he was kind of turning away from him in the picture so that's what he was thinking Bush was thinking.
Howard asked Arlen if he ever went to a shrink. He said he hasn't. Howard said he seems to be a good dad, a good husband, he battled cancer and he still seems to be all together psychologically.
Arlen said that picture shows that he was willing to go out during that treatment and just not worry so much about what he looked like. He said that's what cancer patients have to do.
Howard asked Arlen about Iraq and what he wants to happen there. He said that they have to get out of there eventually but we have to train the Iraqis what to do to keep peace over there. He said that we really do need an exit strategy. Howard agreed with him on that.
Arlen said he was asked on the Today Show yesterday if we are in a recession now and he had to say yes. He said that we have to admit what we have and that's what he did with his cancer as well. He said that the Iraqi government isn't doing very well right now and he has to admit that. He said that we didn't handle Saddam right back in the 90s when we went in there.
Howard gave Arlen some more plugs for his book and some appearances he was making to sign his book. He's going to be in Wilkes Barre, Pennsylvania on Saturday morning and up in Burlington, Vermont on Sunday. He wrapped up a short time later and went to break.
Howard said that he's going to read Arlen's book because he was inspired by what he was saying. Another phone caller said that he gets criticized for listening to him but that interview was so intelligent and on he was very proud of him. Howard said that he likes to mix it up and do different types of interviews. The guy asked Howard about some other people that worked at WRNW when he was there but he didn't remember any of the names he threw out there.
Howard took another call and the guy asked him what he's going to do when his contract is up in 3 years. He predicts that Howard will renew for at least 5 more years, if not 10. Artie let out a sigh when he heard that. He said that's going to kill him if he has to work another 5 or 10 years. The caller thinks that Howard has to wait for Cody and Cassidy to do the show when they get older. That's just one reason he has to stay on the air after this 3 years is up.
The caller said that he knows that Howard doesn't want to touch titties again until he's like 75 so he has to stay on for that. He said that he thinks that Howard will be back to getting sex just once a month and he'll be back to touching titties by that time. Howard thanked him for the call and went to Bobo.
Robin asked Howard what he would do if he couldn't get sex from Beth for 6 months because of some kind of illness. She gave her a theoretical disease and asked Howard what he'd do. Howard said that he'd cheat if she couldn't move and was on a respirator. He said that he'd have to tell her that he didn't think that she would recover and had to cheat. Howard said that he really would wait for 6 months but he'd wait under protest.
Bobo called in and brought up Heather Mills and how she wants to share some photos and video of her with Paul McCartney now that she's gotten her settlement. That led to Howard talking about how she was saying that he was stingy with her when he gave her ''only'' 51 million dollars. He said that her kid can fly anywhere in first class with that kind of money and she had no right complaining about it.
Howard said that she's now selling private messages that she taped. He said that if he was the judge and saw that, he'd take the money away from her. She was recording everything she did with him and it's obvious that she knew what she was doing.
Robin said that she might have to pat down Jim Florentine to make sure he's not taping her. Howard said she should. He doesn't know what's going on out there with all of this taping. He said he's never taped anyone he's had sex with.
Bobo asked if Howard is going to let his news team cover his wedding and the stuff around that. Howard said he's not sure about that. He let Bobo go after that and had Lisa G come in with her news preview.
Howard had Lisa run down her news preview. She said that they have a story about Richard Roeper writing an article about how high up Mark the Bagger and May Pang made it on google trends this week. Howard said that happens every day when they have a guest on the show like that. He said that's the power of satellite radio.
Howard said that Benjy mentioned that he wanted to be on the new Paris Hilton show and he's the number one candidate on the web site for the show. Benjy got in another mention for that site which is ParisBFF.com
Lisa said that they tried to get an interview with Robin's new assistant Stacy but she turned them down. Howard said he'd love to get an interview with her and just ask her about the ear muffs she wears there.
Lisa said that George Takei is going to be on a new show that's coming up soon. Richard came in after that and said that Robin's assistant was there until about 5 yesterday. Robin said that she had a meeting with Jeff Schick about some computer stuff. Richard said that she was asking everyone for their birthdays and stuff too.
Howard asked Lisa if she wants to be in Robin's Girl's Night Out club. She said she doesn't think about that group that way. She said she would like to go to Howard's wedding as a reporter though. Artie said that she could go with him to the wedding but she'd have to agree to a blowy at least. She said that was disgusting and she's not even going to answer that. She said that she'd kiss him but that was it. Artie said that was 7th grade stuff and that's not what he's looking for.
Howard said that they don't let him get in any plugs for the movie but Adam said that he goes out and does press about that show and gets to plug his movie.
Howard talked about the chick that Adam is dancing with, Julianne Hough, and how hot she is. He said that she's so hot that it's sickening. He was about to ask him about getting a boner but his phone died. Howard thought he had offended him but Will said it sounded like the phone just went dead.
Adam was back on the phone a short time later. He told Howard about some of the guys that are on the show with him and how strange it is. He said that there are a lot of good dancers who have been kicked off the show and it's all a popularity contest. Howard figures that he could get on there and stay on because his listeners would keep him on.
Adam said that they want them to be able to go from can't dance to can dance on the show. He said that he's pretty sure that he was better than Penn Jillette but Howard told him that Penn was actually a little better than him. Adam told him to go back and watch the tape again.
Robin said that Adam's partner was wearing more clothes than she's ever seen on that show. He said that he thinks that they have a lot of chemistry, they just can't see it. Howard asked him if he was fantasizing about her when he found out who his partner was. He said that he looks at her like a kid sister. He said she really is a kid. He said that she's really a hayseed and talks with that twang so he's really not that into her. He said that she is like a kid sister, a kid sister that he'd like to bang, but still a kid sister.
Adam said he told her that he was the Vince Lombardi of what he does and she had no idea who Vince Lombardi was. He said that he needs a translator to go between them because they're so out of sync on that stuff.
Howard said that Adam told him in his off-air conversation that he swears that he knows that Julianne is a virgin. He said he gets that from having his knee in her crotch all the time and he can feel what's going on down there. He was just kidding around about that though.
Adam wanted to get in some plugs for his movie. Howard gave him a plug for ''The Hammer'' which you can find out more about at TheHammerMovie.com.
Howard got back to the discussion about the chicks on Dancing with the Stars. Adam said that he thinks that he has a chance of winning the show. Howard said that Steve Gutenberg was talking about how the show was a great thing for him. Adam said that when they say they're practicing for 6 hours a day, they're really doing it. Adam said he's only doing it 2 hours a day because his partner is flying back and forth between Nashville and L.A. so he can't get in that kind of practice that the other guys are getting. Adam said that he doesn't want to win that badly that he'd ask her not to fly out.
Howard said that most of these people don't have other jobs so they have the time to do this stuff. Adam said that they should put a cap on the amount of practice, maybe 3 hours, so they can make it more competitive. Adam said that he just doesn't have the time to practice like some of these other people do. Steve Gutenberg can dance all day long if he wants.
Adam said that the further you get in the show, the more practice you have to do and he just doesn't have the time to do it. He said that he wants to stay on for a few weeks and then get voted off. He doesn't think he'll get voted off tonight because it is a popularity contest and he has a great partner. He thinks that a lot of other people will be voted off first.
Howard said that Julianne is feeling so non-sexual with Adam that she's wearing more clothes than she did last season. Robin thinks that she must feel like she's dancing with her father or something. Adam asked if everyone buys into their retarded theories on the show. Adam said that he's going to bang the bejusus out of Robin when he comes to see her again. Adam said that next week she's going to be wearing something really hot. Robin said that's only if he makes it.
Gary said that they have a clip of Adam calling Carrie Ann a bitch after she gave her score to him. Adam said that he was going for more of a ''ain't that a bitch'' comment rather than calling her that name. Howard played the clip and you do hear Adam say ''Ahhhh.... Bitch!''
Howard gave Adam another plug for his movie. He also talked about Adam walking off his own show to boycott working with Danny Bonaduce. Howard told him he can't do that. Adam said it was very easy to do that.
Howard asked Adam about how some of the other people are doing on the Dancing show. Adam said that he thinks that there are a few people on there who have less personality than he does so he thinks that they're going to get voted off first. Robin thought that Adam was trying to ask for them to vote for him but Adam said he really wasn't.
Adam said that he's not sure why they have some of those chicks on the show this season. Howard said that the chicks this season really don't look good. Adam said that next to his partner, no one looks good. Howard asked who the biggest asshole was on the show. Adam thought about it a little bit and didn't really have any assholes on his list. He said that even Priscilla was very nice to him. He said that they're all being nice to each other and they may just be burnt out.
Howard said that Adam went on Oprah's show with the rest of the crew but she kind of blew him off. Adam said that she was supposed to say hello to everyone but she didn't say hello to ''everyone.'' Howard asked Adam more about Julianne and if he got to see any titty or maybe some camel toe. He said that he's actually felt a lot but not seen anything.
Howard was wrapping up with Adam but he ended up talking about Gene Simmons and how he screwed him over. He said that he wanted him to admit that he's been cheating on his wife. Gene said that he'd do it but then went and did it on Adam's show instead so he could film it for his TV show. Adam said that he's not even sure what the test came up with. He said that when other people talk he tunes out. He said that it all seemed like a farcical set up that the reality show does. Howard said that's why he avoided it on his show. Adam said he just tuned out since he knew that it was just a bunch of bullshit.
Howard asked Adam if he's lost any weight doing the dancing thing. He said that he has lost about 10 or 12 pounds. He said it's really boring practicing though. He said that it's doing the same thing over and over again for 2 hours.
Howard asked Adam what his wife thinks of Julianne. Adam laughed and said she's fine with it. He said that once she met her she knew that it was okay. Howard wrapped up with Adam after giving him another plug for his movie.
Howard and Robin spent a little more time talking about Adam and his dancing. Robin said it looked like he had a stick up his ass when he was dancing.
Howard said that he has some audio clips to play after they go to break. Robin also brought up the Celebrity Rehab show reunion that aired recently. Howard said that show was great and he loves that Daniel Baldwin left the show because he thought he was too good for them. He said that the other people on the show were great.
Howard said that Jeff Conaway was good on the show but he left early. He said that most of the people are people that they've never heard of. He said that the one guy is in a band he's never even heard of. The guy is looney. He said that one girl on the show is addicted to pot but she's really hot. She was on some show that he didn't know. He said that they're all losers on that show and Mary Carey thinks that she's a celebrity on that show.
Gary gave Howard some of the names of the people on the show. Howard didn't know what song this Seth Binzer guy had performed. Fred found the song, by Crazy Town, and Howard recognized it after hearing it. The song Butterfly was a hit but that was about their only hit. Howard said he must have been kind of happening if he had a hit with that song. Artie said that song was a huge hit a few years ago and he heard it all the time over at Scores when he'd go there.
Howard talked about going to strip clubs and how he doesn't care about the music that they play. He said that they could have no music playing and he'd be fine with it. Howard wanted to play more of that Butterfly song but Fred had turned it off. Fred was a little thrown off when Howard mentioned some of the lyrics in the song instead of the name of the song. Fred and Howard went off on each other about that. Howard said that he only knows that guy Seth from his cocaine use and not from that hit song he had.
Irish John asked Howard if he would do a guest appearance on Mary McCormack's new show ''In Plain Sight.'' Howard said he doesn't do appearances like that and he wouldn't do it. He said that the only way he'd appear is in a movie or a major mini-series or something like that. Howard said that he doesn't want to play himself in a TV show or anything like that.
Howard said that he doesn't want to do appearances in any TV shows. He said that when he does his next film he will play a villain or something that makes him look different. He won't give that to a crappy TV show. He said that if he did a show like that, it would be a huge thing and he doesn't want to give that to some TV show when he could do that with a movie instead.
Howard said that he's proven that he can act and he wants to play a role of a villain now to prove that he can play something other than himself.
Howard said that if they had an episode of that show that Mary does where she gave birth to a retarded child, he might play that part. He said that Mary should be coming in soon to promote the new TV show. He spent a minute talking her before going to another break.
Eric asked Howard what tomorrow's show is going to be about and went off on him about the Magic Matt Alan interview. Howard told Eric that he's not the only one on the planet and he's the only one who puts him on the air. Eric said that he wanted to get on sooner because he has things to do. Howard told him to call in another day if he's upset that he doesn't get to him.
Eric said that he had a couple of things he wanted to talk about. He said that he wanted to talk to him about the photos of the strip club he went to. Howard said he saw them. He explained that Eric was at a strip club and there were a lot of naked women around. He wondered what the big deal was but Eric said he just wanted to know what he thought about them.
Howard said that anyone who goes to the strip club is going to see naked chicks. He said that some of the chicks had better faces than others. Eric wanted to make sure that he didn't have anything bad to say about them.
Eric had a big announcement to make so they were calling him Eric the Announcement Maker. Artie called him Eric the Insane Bore.
Eric said that he was going to be going out on tour looking for the hottest stripper. Artie said ''Okay, bye!'' Howard told him to bring her in there when he finds her. Eric said ''Yeah, whatever...'' Howard said he's not sure what he wanted him to say there.
Eric said that his tour is going to start in Sacramento and it will run indefinitely. He's looking for girls between 18 and 30 and the winner will get a modeling contract with his modeling agency (!?) EMA (Eric's Modeling Agency).
robin asked when he got a modeling agency. Howard said it was about 3 seconds ago. Eric said that he will try his best to find the stripper TV and print ads and things like that. Howard said he has no experience in this though. He told him he's excited about that and he'd like to meet the girl when he finds her.
Ralph called in and as soon as Eric heard that he said ''Oh damn it...'' Ralph asked him why he's back on the show now. Eric said that it's not in his best interest to be on the show like Howard said. He said that the fans have been begging him to come back to save the show so that's why he's on. Howard thanked him for that.
Eric said that he called in last week just to show that he can be grateful to people. He thanked the Pure Gold Showgirls club last week. Ralph said that he's back to getting pissed off at Howard when he doesn't pick up on him.
Ralph asked if Eric has picked a new name yet. Howard asked him and played some new clips like 'Eric the Lame Ass Midget, Eric the loud Mouth Midget, Eric the Stupid Bitch, Eric the Gay Actor, Eric the Shit Cock and more.
Eric told Ralph to shut up because he had to make some more points about this contest he has going on. He said that the winner has to live with him or nearby. Howard asked why she has to do that. He said that he's going to make sure that she follows the contract and doesn't go off doing stuff she's not supposed to. The guys sounded kind of creeped out by all of that. Eric said that the contract is going to be 7 years long. Ralph started laughing when he heard that.
Eric said that the winner has to give 50 percent of her earnings to the modeling agency too. He said that he'll be doing a photo shoot for the winner and he will submit the photos to Playboy himself. He said he has a contact over there but it turns out that Johnny Fratto is the one who has the contacts.
Eric was about to throw out a challenge to Howard but Howard cut him off and told him he was killing the show. Howard took a call from High Pitch Eric who was pretending to be Kendra, Eric's ex-girlfriend, who said that she's how dating High Pitch Eric. He went off on Eric the Midget for a few seconds until Howard cut him off.
Another caller told Howard that he's going to have an Eric the Midget look alike contest and he's going to make them live on Conney Island in the freak show over there.
Ralph said that he wanted to hear Eric's last point. Eric said that his programming can get better interviews than Howard can in the next month. Eric said he doesn't have anyone lined up yet. Howard said he has Chris Rock coming in tomorrow. Artie said that they had a senator on today and Eric ''almost booked Dat Phan'' for his show.
Eric said that he hasn't been listening to Howard very much lately on Howard 100. Howard told him that he is on the phone almost every day though. Eric told Howard that he hasn't been calling in that much. He said that he's only called in 3 times since the 25th of last month.
Howard told Eric he had to go and tried to wrap up with him but Eric had a lot more to say. Howard asked if Eric is going to pay for the stripper to live in an apartment nearby. He said that he would be willing to do that. He said that he'll be taking 50 percent of her earnings though. Howard let Eric go a short time later.
Ralph was laughing and said that he came back better than ever. Howard took another call from a guy who said that he finds himself caring about Eric even though he seems like such an ungrateful prick.
Howard told her that she was very naive after he heard that she didn't even have the dog chipped. The woman said that her name is Clara and she really wants to get her back. Howard said that they'd let her know if they hear anything from anyone about the dog. He put her on hold so they could get her information.
Howard said you have to be a little street smart and not leave a dog out there like that. He said that there has to be a little bit of not caring if your dog get stolen when you do something like that. He said that people who steal a dog are sick too. Artie said that he hopes that the dog isn't being tortured or something. He hopes that it's dead and not being tortured.
Howard played some clips of Riley talking about the food poisoning and what he was going to be doing on the show. Then Howard played some clips from last week's Riley Martin show where he had his ''food poisoning'' and was rambling on and on about some nonsense. Artie mentioned that he got arrested for driving under the influence of food poisoning once.
Howard played some clips from last night's show where Riley was talking to come callers about Barack Obama and things like that. Riley was going off on the news coverage of Barack and his preacher. Howard said that the guy is out of his mind but Robin said that's pretty obvious from what he does on that radio show of his.
Howard had a clip where Riley goes into a story that he had started to tell last week. It was 13 minutes long so Howard said he wasn't going to make it through the whole thing. Robin told him to see how far he could make it. Howard gave up about a minute into it. IT was too coherent according to Artie. Robin asked if he could get some more food poisoning for next week's show.
Howard played some more of last week's show where Riley was slurring his speech and it was a little more entertaining.
Howard had some Celebrity Fit Club clips to play too. He said he had a clip of a woman, Tokara, from that show blowing up at someone about something and he wasn't sure why she did it. JD said that he wasn't exactly sure why she went off on them like that even though he was the one who pulled the clip.
Howard played the clip where she went off on everyone about how she likes who she is and no one respects that. She ended up screaming and crying for a couple of minutes. One of the guys there was telling her to calm down and ''have some class'' but that seemed to make things even worse.
Howard and the guys had some fun with that clip and goofed on the way the woman was going nuts. Howard said he had to hear the clip again and replayed it. When the guy was telling her to have some class she got even more angry and started screaming at him. Robin said that it sounded like she was getting tazered or something while that was going on. Fred threw in some dog barking clips during the replay.
JD said he had a clip of Dustin Diamond going off on someone on the show too. He said he thought it was just as good. Howard played that clip, which was from last season, and the instructor was going off on Dustin and yelling at him but Dustin just took it and shot back at him. The instructor was cursing at him and Dustin just gave him a ''whatever...'' Robin said it sounds like a show full of lunatics.
Howard said that he tries to watch that show but he gets bored. He said they should get right to clips like that instead of dragging it out. Robin said that Ant, the host, is looking kind of odd on the show too. They had to go to break after that.
Howard said that the fifth anniversary of being in Iraq is coming up this week. He said that he can't believe that it's been that long. He read that they predicted it was going to cost $50-60 billion but now it's up over 600 million and it's still going. Now they're predicting that it could cost $1-2 trillion before it's all over. Howard said that's why the dollar is shit right now.
Howard said that the economy is really fucked up right now. He brought up the Bear Stearns thing and said that all of the people who had their retirements based with that company are screwed now. Robin said that their stock was up over $100 at one point, now it's down to $2.
Howard read an article about the war in Iraq and the amount of money we've thrown at that mess. Howard read that 1,785 is the number of days since President Bush announced ''Mission Accomplished.'' Artie said that a lot of people are dying over there but there are also a ton of people who are getting injured. He met one guy who lost a leg over there who comes to a lot of his shows. He said that there must be a lot of guys out there like that.
Howard said he had some e-mail about Brianna Frost's breasts and they have that show up on Howard TV now. He said that's a show you have to see. Artie may have been right about her being the hottest piece of ass that was up there. Howard read some of the e-mail about her and one guy said that they are definitely fake boobs because he had seen her pre-implants. The guy said that she was flat chested as an infant but now she's got huge boobs so they're definitely fake.
Steve said that they have another Lowdown with High Pitch Mike segment. He goes off on Robin about her Girls Night Out club. Howard said that he must see it as being left out of the cool girl's club and that's why he's going of on them.
Howard and Robin talked about the club for a short time and wondered how people get into that club. Robin said that anyone can't just join the club, they have to be friends. Howard said that when you name your friends like that, it's kind of strange. Robin said that they're just girls hanging out. Howard said that's not the case. He said that it's an exclusive club that makes her seem kind of elitist. Robin said that it's really not.
Robin said that she can't get into Howard's posse of friends. Howard said he doesn't have a group of friends that he names.
High Pitch Mike came in and asked Robin if she knows the name of the country that she's doing this charity for. She said the name of it and knew where it was located so Mike was surprised by that.
Mike was saying that he thinks that anyone who wants to donate money should be allowed to. Robin said that they can. Howard kept digging at Robin and irritating her and told her that he loves doing that. Robin said that people are going to call and say that she's elitist and she's really not. Howard brought up Leslie Barbara and asked why she can't just be in the club. Robin said that she is friends with her but she may not want to be in the club. She has to go out with the group before they'll make her part of the GNO.
Howard said that he'd argue that she's married to Dominic Barbara so she has a lot of money to give to the charity. Artie argued that the reason not to let her in is because she's married to Dominic Barbara. He said that some of the other broads are going to get jealous of her for having a rich husband and they'll have to kick her out.
Howard said that Leslie probably won't show up for meetings after the novelty wears off. Robin said that they don't have meetings, they just go out to dinner.
Mike was talking to Robin about the charity and what she'll be doing for it. Robin said she has been asked to go over to the country that they're sending the money to but she's not sure if she'll be going. Mike said that he'd go with her and he'd use all of his frequent flier miles to get himself over there. Robin sounded surprised that he wanted to go over there with her.
Dominic Barbara called in and said that Leslie will make all of the meetings and he will donate $10,000 in honor of Howard and Beth's engagement instead if giving it to the North Shore Animal League. Howard said that he was out of the wedding now because of that. Dominic then said that he'd give 10 to both charities then. Leslie was on the phone too so she said that she thinks that the charity is a good thing and she'd love to be part of it.
Howard told Leslie to forget about the charity and think about going out to dinner and dancing and stuff. Leslie said that if she can get along with Dominic, she can get along with anyone.
Ralph called in and said that he had people calling him and talking about this group and how it just gives them some direction. Robin said that he's been out with them before so he shouldn't be talking like that. Robin said that he acts like a guy when he goes out and takes pictures of the girls' thongs.
Robin mentioned this woman Zabiba who is the head of the charity they're raising money for. She mentioned the name a few times and the guys sounded like they were thrown off a little bit by the name.
Steve got back to his news preview and said that there was a sign up at a store where they claimed that one of Jackie the Joke Man's products might expose people to lead. Howard said he believes that the Jokemaster is safe and doesn't believe that story at all.
Jon Hein came in and ran down the stuff they were going to be covering today on the Wrap Up Show. He mentioned the major stuff that was going on today during the show.
Howard asked Artie if he was okay because he looked out of it. Artie said that he wasn't in a good way today and he wasn't feeling so good. He said he was thinking about how he had to fly out tomorrow to do a gig and he wasn't feeling so good about that. Howard told Artie that they have Benjy there to be Artie's future liver. He said they're just farming him.
Artie said that he thinks that he might have over eaten today and that's why he's not feeling so good. He had two cupcakes and a sandwich earlier. Howard said he had stains on his shirt too and he did look like a mess. Artie said that he's been told to get a colonic and he'd feel better. Howard said that he can't imagine what would come out of him.
Artie said that he woke up at 4 this morning and wasn't able to sleep. He said that he watched some of the John Adams thing on demand. He ate some pizza with some Coke while that was going on. Then he got there and ate some cupcakes since it was Cupcake Wednesday today. He had a bagel and some Hawaiian Punch as well.
Artie said that he has to rethink his cupcake because it's too rich for him. IT turns out he ate 3 cupcakes, not just 2. Howard said that he saw him eating while Arlen Specter was there and he was just eating and reading the paper.
Artie said he had the sandwich too. Howard ran down the list of food that he had eaten and it was a lot of stuff. He had 4 sodas on top of all of that other stuff and that was in a matter of 5 hours. Artie said that his body is rejecting something and he just wasn't feeling good. Howard told him to go lay down or something. Artie didn't want to do that.
Howard tried to get Artie to lay on the couch and take a nap but he really didn't want to do that. He said he just wanted to lay his head down on his desk.
Ralph called in again and said that he loved that Artie said he ''might'' have eaten too much today. Artie said that yesterday he had to go meet a friend of his and he told the guy to be there on time and he wasn't. He went to Wendy's since it was right there while he waited. He had a Wendy's triple and that's the worst thing to eat. He had that and a Frosty.
Howard interrupted and said that Artie is laying back in his chair and he was talking to his bald spot. Gary said that he was looking on SeriousEats.com and they say that one of those Crumbs cupcakes is about as much as 3 slices of pizza. That was about 1600 calories. They added up some of the other calories and came up with thousands of calories.
Artie said he had Chicken Parm and pizza for dinner last night too. The food just kept adding up. It was all carbs too. Fred told him that's what's getting him, all of the carbs. Artie said that he doesn't have the greatest eating habits and he was sorry for that.
Ralph told Howard he's got a big problem on his hands. Howard was going to let him go but he stayed on the line and talked about the food for a little longer. Artie said he had 4 slices brought over to him last night and he only ate 2 for dinner. He saved the other 2 for this morning's breakfast. He said that he actually dips the pizza into the chicken parm sauce. Robin started laughing her ass off when she heard that.
Artie said that he's basically living in his kitchen now. That's where his office has been moved to so he can watch TV while he's eating and working. He said he knows he has to do something before this summer because he's such a mess. Artie said that he has pizza boxes all over his apartment and the Mexican comes over to clean it up like twice a day.
The guys brought in a recliner for Artie so they had to come over to him and pull him out of his chair so he could move over there. They brought him to the recliner but Artie didn't think it looked that comfortable. He said he'd never get out of it if he got into it. Fred said it looked like an oversized child seat. Artie sat in it and tried to relax. They gave him a microphone and a headset and even gave him a pillow. He was instructing the guys what to do for him as he was getting comfy.
Howard told Artie to just relax while they did the news. Artie said that radio is great. Fred played a lullaby song for him so he could take a little nap.
Robin read a story about the chicks in Sex and The City and how Kristin Davis is claiming that the pictures out on the web of her in a sex scene are fake. There was some news about the other girls as well.
Robin read a story about Charlie Rose getting a black eye when he fell in a pot hole. After that Howard pointed out that Artie was asleep. Howard and Robin talked about him for a few seconds before Artie woke up and apologized. He said that he was just so tired. He said that he had to go home and pack today so he can fly out tomorrow to Miami. Howard told him to just go back to sleep.
Robin read a story about Ryan Seacrest but the guys were still distracted by Artie laying in that recliner. Artie was laughing his ass off at that. He said he caught Howard looking at him when he was trying to fall asleep.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked if Artie had enough calories this morning to feed that whole country that Robin's charity is sending the money to. He said that they may have to call Richard Simmons and rename Artie to Artie Hebranco.
Howard took another call from a woman who said that Artie has to do something about this. She said that he's making her think that he's retarded. He said he has a problem with his glands. Another guy called in and asked about the special chair that Artie got and why he's getting special treatment like that after only doing this for 7 years. Artie said that he could have called in sick or left early today.
Ralph called in and said that he timed how long it was from the time Artie last spoke to the time he fell asleep and it was 19 seconds! He said that no one can fall asleep that quickly. A guy called in as ''Death'' and said that he wanted to meet Artie in the bathroom because he has a rectal aneurysm scheduled for him later.
Another guy called in and told Artie that he should stay off the beach down in Miami or they'll keep pushing him back into the water.
Robin got back to her news and read some stuff about Barack Obama's latest press conference. She had some audio clips that she had Howard play. She and Howard ended up arguing about the stuff he was saying. Robin said that. Howard said he didn't care what he was saying. He said that Barack Obama claims that he's a brilliant decision maker but being friends with that reverend shows he can't make the right decisions. Robin argued with him on that.
Robin said that she's seen people who say inappropriate things in their little groups and no one says anything. Howard and Artie said that this is different because he's in politics. Howard said that Barack supports a racist and that's it. Robin said that Howard supports Daniel Carver who is in the KKK. Howard said he doesn't support the guy, he doesn't go to temple where he's the rabbi. Robin said he was splitting hairs with that argument. Howard said that he's not running for office so this argument makes no sense to him.
robin said that Barack's speech was great and incredible. Howard disagreed. Artie said that this reminded him of being at home hearing his parents arguing.
Gary told Howard that Artie was just about falling asleep while they were doing this and his eyes were fluttering. Howard said he just wanted to end the news so he could get out of there. It was close to 11 o'clock.
Robin read through some more stories about a few various things before she wrapped up. She had some stories about American Idol, Hillary and Bill Clinton and a few other things. they were going to end the show but Gary said the Howard TV guys wanted to see Artie get up out of the chair. Artie did that and Howard said his whole asshole was sticking out. He said that he really has to lose weight, he was barely able to get out of that chair. Artie blamed the chair and said it was hard to get out of. Howard told him he knows what he has to do. Howard ended the show around 11:05am.
Gary said that the entire bullpen in the office erupted into laughter. Gary said that he pictures that Artie running on the beach down in Miami. He was claiming that he wanted to start running down there when he goes down this weekend.
Gary said that he's not sure what they can do, Artie knows that he has to lose weight. Jon said he's really worried about him and his weight as a friend and that's why he wanted to test his blood sugar. Gary said that he's glad that Artie isn't there right now. He said that people come in his office and talk about how bad Artie is looking these days.
Teddy said that Artie tries not to eat too much. they actually walked on the beach the last time they were down there. He said that he was contemplating getting a place down there. He said that Artie is lots of talk but he doesn't do anything. He said that it's hard to change like that.
Teddy said that Artie lost a lot of weight when he started on the show back in 2001. He was also on drugs back when he lost the weight. He said that Artie says that he really has to want to lose weight but he doesn't have that catalyst to make him do it.
Teddy said that he gets a lot of offers from investors who are willing to pay whatever it takes to help Artie lose the weight. He's not even sure if Artie is putting a gym in his new place because he has no idea what Artie is up to sometimes.
The guys described what Artie looked like when he got into that chair and pulled up the blanket. They said that it really did look like a car seat for a kid. Jon wondered if this is where Artie is going to spend every day during the news. Gary said that he passed out in the green room one time so there's no telling where he might go next.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that it seems like Artie is still being effected by the opiates that he was taking. He said he knows what it's like and how he must be reacting to that stuff. He said that he's not sure if he ever stopped using. The guys said that Artie is on that Subutex stuff so he claims to not be on the heroin anymore.
The caller said that he gained a lot of weight when he was on heroin and he was a real mess. Gary cut him off and said that he doesn't think that Artie is on drugs, he's just eating too much. He sees the food he eats and he sees that as the problem.
The guys talked about Artie's weight and how they're not sure what it's going to take to get him into better shape. Jason came in and said that Artie has a weight problem and he's out of control. Teddy said that was coming from a guy with a Godiva box with him.
Jason said that there are a lot of people who don't eat right there. They talked about how JD has that belly on him even though he's not really fat. Gary said that he admits that he has an eating disorder as well. Jon said that he does too.
Jason said that Howard has to struggle with what he eats too all the time even though he's skinny. Teddy said that Artie always passes out on a Wednesday and that's because it's cupcake Wednesday. They talked about all of the food that comes up every week and how they all change their plans based on the cupcakes.
A caller said that Artie has problems with being alone and that might be why he eats so much. He also said that he probably has other problems like sleep apnea and things like that. Jon said that Artie knows all of that but the question is ''what is he going to do about it?''
Gary said that a lot of people have told Artie that he has to lose weight and no one has anything new to add to that. Jason said that he might need some Lexipro or something.
Another caller said that his doctor put him in the hospital after he went up to 300 pounds and had sleep apnea. He said that he was tired because he wasn't getting the right kind of sleep. Gary said that he doesn't think that's Artie's problem. Jason was pretty sure that he had a sleep study done on him. Teddy confirmed it and said that they found there wasn't a problem with that.
Jon said that he hopes that it doesn't take something tragic to wake Artie up because that's the path he's heading down. Gary said that he knew a guy who lost his toes because of something like that.
Another caller said that he thinks that Artie has a hole to fill and the booze that he's drinking isn't going to fill that hole. He said that Artie has to take that first step and do something about it. He said that Artie seems to be refusing to take that first step to take care of his problem. Jon said that they all agree on that and they know that but they don't know what it's going to take to make it right.
Jon took another call from a guy who said that everyone is calling in with theories but Artie is probably going to wait for the shit to hit the fan before he makes a change. Jason thinks that the shit has hit the fan but it still isn't hitting him that he has to do something. He had change fall out from the folds of his belly, he slept through his friend's wedding and he's fallen asleep on the toilet a few times. The caller thinks that it might take a heart attack or something to wake Artie up.
The guys talked about some things that Artie could do to start with a diet. Jon said that he just has to eat one cupcake instead of two and things like that.
Gary said that Artie should probably keep a log of what he eats for a week. He knows that Artie isn't going to want to do that though. Teddy wondered what Artie should do to fix his sleeping habits. They said that he has a gym at his apartment building and he could work out there. Teddy said that he has people there who ask for tickets to his shows and stuff there. He can't just go and work out without people bothering him according to Teddy. Gary said he could go out for walk or something when he gets home.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that maybe they should get rid of Cupcake Wednesday. That would be punishing everyone else though. Gary said that Tom used to bring in Dunkin Donuts every day and one person said something to him about a diet and he stopped. That really pissed everyone else off. Gary also said that it's just one day a week and that's not what is killing Artie.
Ralph called in and said that there is a ton of good food out there that Artie could be eating. He said that he could also eat some of that other crap in moderation and it would help him out. He said there's nothing that anyone can do and he really has to do it for himself. Ralph said he's offered Artie his help but he doesn't want it.
Ralph said that he went down to visit his mother in Tampa and she has a string of fast food joints down there and he hit every single one of them. He said he loved it. He was eating KFC and stuff like that and really enjoyed it. He eats it in moderation though so he doesn't get fat. He said that today he's just drinking coffee.
Ralph said that he doesn't think that Artie is going to be able to run down in Miami either. He said that maybe his family should get involved at this point and do something. He's not sure what they could do.
Benjy thinks that if Artie had a girl that might help. Gary said that's not going to happen. Ralph said that he has the world at his feet and he's still not doing anything. Ralph said that he seems to be becoming a buffoon on the show and this is going beyond just eating poorly. The guys told him how funny it was watching him trying to get out of that chair earlier. They spent a couple more minutes on that and then went to commercial break.
The guys ended up goofing on Sal about a comment he made using the word proponent. Benjy was trying to convince him that if you're a proponent, then you're a pro in the opponent field.
Sal said that he lost weight a few years ago and went to meetings and stuff when he gained a few pounds. He said that it was king of depressing sitting in a room with a bunch of fat chicks who were applauded for losing 1/8th of a pound. Sal said that he ended up quitting the meetings and just stuck with the program that he started with.
Jon played a clip of Specter talking about the merger and what he thought about what was going on with that. Jon said that Howard was saying that he thought something funny was going on with the merger and someone was being paid off. Specter didn't think that at all.
A phone caller said he felt that the Senator was kind of beating about the bush with his answer on that merger thing. He said they should have asked him if he thinks that this would have been held up for this long if Howard wasn't on satellite. The caller said that he knows that there is a lot of competition out there and he doesn't have to pay for radio if he doesn't want to. He doesn't get why it's being held up and not just being approved.
The caller thinks that Howard being there is part of the reason that it hasn't been announced. Gary said that he thinks that it's not because people are out to get Howard, it's just that it makes it a different medium than it used to be. He said that if Howard wasn't there the merger probably would have gone through in seconds because no one would think that they'd go anywhere.
Jason said that he thinks that Specter could have been trying to protect his fellow Senators by saying no one is being paid off. He said that it's obvious that's what's going on with lobbyists paying off these people.
The guys spent a minute talking to Jason about being part of Robin's Girls Night Out club. Jason said he's proud to be a founding member and no one can ever take that away from him.
That led to Gary asking Sal if he would want to be a part of a group like that. Sal said he has no interest in Robin's group, he would be more interested if Howard had a group like that. Sal said that he doesn't think that this charity thing is sincere. If if was she'd keep it quiet and just donate without telling everyone about it. They spent another minute on that before they had to end the show.
Howard started the show asking Artie if he got some sleep last night. Artie just said ''what's up man'' to that question. Howard went on to talk about the woman who called in yesterday about her missing dog. Beth got involved somehow and she managed to get the word out. She was all distraught about it because the dog needs medication. Someone came by and stole the dog and now she's offering a $3,000 reward for its return.
Howard said that the dog's picture is in the paper this morning and on his web site too. He said that there's someone who called in and said that they know that there's a guy in that neighborhood who may have stolen it but the cops wouldn't come and check it out.
Howard said that Beth was getting so upset about it that it was making him ill hearing about it. He read the article about the kidnapped dog that was in the NY Post today. Beth wanted to make sure this woman got her dog back so she went out and contacted the paper. She said that they won't ask any questions if the dog is returned.
Howard said that if anyone can help, just call them. He said that maybe Robin's group, GNO, can help out with this too. Fred played some Mission Impossible music while Howard was having some fun talking about how they were like super heroes in that group.
Howard said it was hard to eat dinner while Beth was painting the picture of what was going on with that dog. He said she has a way of putting it that makes it really upsetting. Howard said they have to find that dog after hearing all of that from her. He said that now he has to get the dog found.
Robin said that if she saw someone walking down the street with that dog she wouldn't be able to recognize it. Howard said he would. He said he noticed the coloring and the size of the dog. He said that it's not a full breed dog either so the thief can't make any money trying to sell it or anything. He said that the guy who took it is probably just going to throw it out on the street if he finds out about what's going on.
Howard said he got something in the mail about a dog adoption book for kids. He said that it's really hard core because the stories are about where dogs came from before the kids adopted them. He talked about the book and how it makes money for the humane society.
Howard told Robin that she hasn't been correctly pronouncing the name of the country that she's sending her charity money to. He thought he had some mail about that so he tried to find it but it wasn't printed out. It was in his notes but not printed according to Gary. He eventually found it and told Robin how it was supposed to be pronounced. Robin said ''You know what, F-him!'' She said she'd try it his way and told Howard to move on to the next story.
Howard said that he was reading a story about a woman who went in for a leg operation and ended up with a new anus instead. Fred played some clips of Henry Hill laughing while he was reading that. Howard said the story was from Germany and they had mixed up a couple of patients.
Howard said that his assistant Laura had her dog operated on and she put a big x on the dog's leg so they'd operate on the right one. She had heard about so many people having the wrong thing operated on that she wanted to make sure it was done right.
Howard had a picture of Artie that someone had sent in. The guy said that's what he pictured Artie looking like when he was sleeping on the air yesterday. Artie said that he went home yesterday and slept from about 1:30 until 3 this morning. He said that he feels refreshed today.
Howard read some mail about Artie's eating that they discussed on the show yesterday. Someone wrote in and told Artie that he's basically committing slow suicide the way he's eating. They told Howard to get him some help immediately, like he has any control over what Artie does.
Howard said he got some mail about Gary talking about May Pang and how she wasn't interested in him at all when he went to her apartment. One writer said that Gary seemed to think that she wasn't into him because he was too young. He pointed out that maybe it was his looks that she wasn't interested in. Gary said that he was better looking back then, when he was 28, than he is now.
Howard read some mail about Magic Matt Alan and how boring he was. The guys talked about that interview a little bit. Howard read another e-mail about Artie and how he had offered to bring Lisa G with him to Howard's wedding if she gave him an open mouth kiss. Artie said that he's going back on his word with that.
Howard said that people are upset that Eric the Midget is calling back into the show. He said he got thousands of e-mails about that. Artie said that he must be interesting in some way because it takes him weeks to get sick of him. He said that he is interesting to him.
Howard had some pictures of Benicio and what he'll look like in the movie. The guys were all impressed at how he looked in the make up.
Artie asked Howard about the Chris Rock article that he mentioned earlier. Howard got to that and said that they were saying Chris has a new act now and they quoted some of it in the article. He said that some of the stuff was about Hillary Clinton and pretty funny. He said that Chris is talking about how he would love to see a woman in office but maybe not ''THAT woman.'' He also talks about Barack Obama and how that name is like two major African names. Howard read some of the quotes that they had in the article about Chris. He said he didn't want to go into the whole thing though.
Artie said that it would be fun to check him out on tour now that he has an all new act. Howard said that they have a woman in a picture with Chris who is completely naked and licking his face. Chris has his shirt off in the picture too. Artie liked that picture so Howard figured he'd love to do a photo shoot like that.
Howard said that last night he was making notes for the show and telling Jason what to print out. He was telling him about the dog stuff and had about 17 notes about that one subject alone. He said that someone has to find that dog. Howard said that he thinks the cops are going to go after that guy they heard may have kidnapped the dog.
Howard mentioned all of the stuff they were going to be doing on the show today. They had a lot of guests calling in and coming in. They had Ryan Phillippe coming in and Kid Rock and Reverend Run as well.
Howard noticed that Artie had taken a Subutex so he asked why he took that. Artie said that he woke up with the shakes this morning and he's got to fly today and he hates flying so much. He was also saying that he thinks he might have OCD now. He said he lays out his shit for the next day the night before. He said that he can't go to sleep unless he knows they're all straight. He said that he's talking about a millimeter.
Howard asked Artie what his fear is. He said that he doesn't have a fear, he just has to make it all straight. Howard tried digging into that more but Artie said that he's not sure what his fear is. He said that if he does go to sleep and he sees that it's like 7:13, he can't go to sleep until it's 7:14 because he's afraid that it's bad luck. Howard told him it does sound like OCD to him. He said that when his father was still around he would have to be the last one to check him if he went out. He had to fix the sheets a certain way too.
Artie said that he gets obsessed with some movies sometimes and he'll watch a movie like 50 times in a weekend. He said that he also has to stop it at the same time in the movie every time. He said that he's been watching that movie Crumb like 3 times a day too.
Howard said he's had OCD for a long time and he suffers with that quite a bit. He said that he's had a touch of that coming back lately and it's got him very dismayed. He said that he has to read the paper in a certain way and showed Artie what that looks like. He said that he and his shrink talk about it and it doesn't seem to have helped him out very much. He said that he had it very bad in the past and he knows what he has to do to fix it.
Howard said that he just went cold turkey doing that stuff and was able to make it stop. He said that he vowed that he was going to control the world he lives in and got over it. He said that he had the best time of his life when he stopped doing all of that stuff. He said that the Dr. Sarno book is what helped him out with that and his back pain.
Howard said he had issues with the clock being on odd numbers and stuff kind of like what Artie does. Artie said that he thinks that some of his stuff is based on germs and stuff like that. Artie said he doesn't get why he has to have his cards straight with each other when he's got so many other things going on. Robin said that it's a way to get attention away from the other stuff he's doing or not doing.
The guys talked about Chris and how he still wants to be a movie star even though he's had so many flops. Artie doesn't get that because he's such a great comic.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that the guy who stole that bulldog should be hanged. Howard agreed and said that anyone that would do that is horrible. They spent a minute on that subject before getting back to Chris Rock.
Artie asked Howard if he would feel incomplete as a performer if his movie had sucked or didn't make any money. Howard said that he has a lot of stuff in his life that has gone to number one and that wouldn't have bothered him that much. He said that he wrote the two books and they were very successful but that's because of radio. He said that radio was his major focus and that's what he does best. He said that's what Chris should be thinking about his stand-up career.
Howard said that a lot of stand-up comics have very difficult jobs. He said that some of them only have 3 full acts in them and they have to make that last. He said that it's tough to come up with new stuff over time. He said a lot of bands out there are like that. They can only come up with a few hit songs.
Howard had Dee Snider on the ISDN line so he asked him about how tough it is to come up with hit songs. Dee said that it really is tough but there are other things that can effect your career too. He said that he did have a couple of hits but he couldn't keep it going.
Robin asked Dee if he would want to get into a bunch of other stuff if he could have kept the hits coming. Dee said that was a good question but he didn't have an answer. He said he wasn't sure. He said that it can be tough to be stuck in something that you want to branch out of. He said that people change and they lose that connection to that thing they do.
Dee said that he ended up changing when he had all of his cars, boats, the house and a great wife and he lost that drive to write another teen angst song. Howard talked about how he and Leslie West talked one time about ''Fight For Your Right To Party'' and Leslie was saying that should have been Dee's next song. Howard said that he told Leslie that wasn't his song to write though, it was the Beastie Boys.
Howard asked Dee if they're still airing ''Gone Country.'' He said it's in reruns now. Howard said he never saw the end of the season but he did watch some of it and it was pretty good. He said that there wasn't enough singing in it but Dee was funny on the show. He said that Bobby Brown almost peed on him and Dee was funny in that.
The guys talked about how messed up Bobby Brown was and they didn't understand why Whitney Houston would marry him. Dee said the guy really has a good heart but he had a child star upbringing and he's like a man child. He said that he did have a problem with his bladder though. He said he really liked the guy and now his son is on a show with Bobby's son.
Howard said that they took a bunch of kids and stuck them in a house together to perform songs live. They're competing for a recording contract. Dee said that his son Jesse is a singer and he thinks that he's really good. He said that he's a rock singer and they have a lot of people on there who are the kids of famous people. Howard said that Joe Walsh's daughter is in the show and she actually had a singing career going on before this.
They have Eddie Money's daughter, Olivia Newton John's daughter, MC Hammer's daughter, Al B Sure's son and more. Dee was saying that they found people who can actually sing or have something to bring to the table. That show starts on April 3rd.
Howard asked Dee if he won the Gone Country thing. He said that he didn't win but Julio Iglacias Jr. did and people are outraged. He said that people online are sending thousands of angry e-mails about that outcome.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that Dee was ripped off and he thinks that his song could be a hit song as either a rock song or a country song. Dee said that John Rich asked him to come out and record his song with him even though he didn't win.
Dee said that during the finale he kept saying something in his song that kind of freaked out some of the people in the crowd. He threw in the line ''I can fuck all night'' and gave the finger so that kind of bothered some people.
Howard asked how Carnie Wilson did in the show. Dee said that she did well and so did Maureen McCormick. He said that John Rich was the one guy who picked the winner out of the group. Dee said that he had them doing all of this country star stuff with him. He said that Julio slept through a lot of what they did and he didn't do all of the stuff that they did. John picked Julio because the girls were screaming for him. Howard said that you really have to be beautiful in this world.
Howard said that Dee has been busy lately raising money for the families of the people who were killed and injured in the Great White show at a club a few years ago. Dee taped a show for VH-1 called Aftermath and that will air this Sunday night at 10pm on VH-1. You can find out more about the charity at StationFamilyFund.org.
Dee thanked Howard for the support and told him to watch ''Rock the Cradle'' on April 3rd. Sal came in and asked Dee if he makes any money off the Guitar Hero games that are out there. Dee said that they do make some licensing money on that. Sal said that they have a bunch of bands that are washed up and put them in the game. Dee said that it's bands from the 80s and he is making money off the licensing on the songs.
Dee talked about how great these Guitar Hero and Rock Band games are for the older songs. He said that his 11 year old kid is playing the game and singing Mississippi Queen. He said that he called Leslie West and had him talking to his daughter and she was blown away. Howard said that the kids should be playing real instruments instead of playing fake ones.
Gary said that his kids have been playing Rock Band and they play for hours and hours. He said that he knows that they should be playing the real thing but this only takes seconds to get into it. Howard said that the money is at real guitar, not in fake instruments in Guitar Hero.
Gary said that he has a YouTube video of a guy doing a version of Freebird and it's really the gayest thing he's seen. Howard wrapped up with Dee and let him go a short time later.
Howard let Scott off the hook and said that he had to take a break. Artie brought up Ryan Phillippe before they went to break so they spent a minute talking about him and how he's been on the show before. Fred actually did a scene with him in ''Cruel Intentions'' for about five seconds. Fred said that he still goes out on auditions for movies but his career really went down hill after that movie.
Fred said that he was looking into some actor who almost had the Han Solo role in Star Wars but George Lucas changed his mind and cast Harrison Ford in the part. He said that the guy's name was Glen Turmon and he was a black guy. Howard said that would have made the movie a lot different if he had gotten the part. Fred thinks that he's kind of like that guy because he's a good actor that no one knows about. Howard went to break a short time after that discussion.
Howard said that he doesn't think that anything on her is being taken care of. He said that he knows that women have a lot to do down there when they have their period. He remembered the big sanitary belt that his mother used to wear. He said that he remembers seeing those things when he was a kid and he felt like Beavis and Butt-Head wanting to get one just to see what it was. Fred played some of the Beavis and Butt-Head laughing clips for Howard when he brought them up. Howard said he still doesn't know what a sanitary belt looks like. Every time he'd bring that up Fred would play the laughing clips.
Howard played Wendy's vomiting voice mails and got a few laughs out of that. She was really heaving pretty hard. Howard said it sounds like she's possessed. She eventually flushes the toilet and hangs up. Then she called back to explain why she was puking. She said that she's been sick for a couple of days and blamed it on her ''You know what'' (period). She said she'd call back when she feels better.
Howard said that they may have done an ''Ask the Retards'' where she talked about her period. He played that bit that the guys had put up on his screen. In the clip they have a woman bring up how she gets diarrhea whenever she's on her period and both Gary and Wendy the Retards talked about that subject. The two of them were arguing about the right thing to do when a woman has that problem. Howard said that bit is so good. He said that he knows that there's a lot of confusion with a woman's period.
Howard said that he heard that Jon Hein is a big Guitar Hero fan and he brought his guitar over to JD's house to play. Gary said that they could set it up in the studio and play it so he can see what goes on. Howard wondered what they do so Jon came in and explained it.
Jon said that he brought his guitar with him so he could hang out and play with the guys. He said that it does require a little skill. He said that the songs they pick on it are great songs and that's why people seem to like it so much. He said that kids never listened to that stuff and they get to hear it in this game.
Howard saw a picture of Jon with his guitar at his daughter's bat mitzvah. Jon said that they do look like dorks in the picture but it's a lot of fun.
Gary said that the game is for kids who are never going to learn instruments to feel like a rock star. That's what the creator of the game says it's for. Howard thinks that it's a waste of time to play it. Artie said that they really should be learning real guitar instead of playing a fake one.
The caller said that he wanted to talk up a song like Magic Matt was doing yesterday because he thinks that he can do it better. Gary said that Magic Matt sent in a demo tape of what he does when he introduces songs and they were all pretty weird. Howard played some of those and wondered how those DJs can do that. He said that delivery is just fascinating to him. He tried to do an impression of what those guys sound like and talked up a song.
Howard played more of the Magic Matt stuff and said that he has no idea what the guy just said. He said a lot of words but he's not sure what the hell he was talking about.
The guy on the phone tried to talk up the Blondie song that they played yesterday. He did okay but missed the post by about 8 seconds according to Fred. The guy said that he didn't practice it so he wasn't that well prepared for it.
Howard replayed the Magic Matt stuff and tried to figure out what he was saying. He had to replay a couple of the clips to try and figure it all out. Robin was helping him interpret but it was still kind of confusing. Howard said that he thinks that these DJs don't have to create any content, they just say a bunch of gibberish and that's all that matters.
Howard said he wants to go in and audition for a job at a radio station and do this DJ talk up stuff. He demonstrated what his act would be like if he went in and did that. He did one talk up and Robin said that they'd throw him right out if he did that. Howard said he was really drained by it too. He was wiped out after just a couple of songs.
Robin said that Howard looked funny talking up the songs because he was flailing his arms around. Howard said that those guys must be insane talking up those songs that way. He did more of his wacky DJ impression and talked up another song. He played more of the Magic Matt stuff too. Matt was telling a joke in one of the clips. Howard said he probably got that off of a joke service.
Howard said that guy is awesome. In one clip he just about did a whole news report about something as he was talking up the song. Howard talked about Rick Dees and how he used to brag about using a joke service for his show. He said that he remembered seeing ads in a radio magazine where they advertised some joke service and Rick was quoted as saying he loved it.
Howard and Fred talked about how they got Jackie the Joke Man's box of stuff and found out about him and eventually booked him to do the show. They didn't originally book him to write jokes for them though. they wanted him to do bits and stuff with them.
Howard talked up another song but screwed it up when Fred played some other stuff over the beginning of the song. He had played some audio of a wacky preacher over it. Artie said that would be great if the DJs just told a bunch of racist jokes and stuff as they were talking up the songs.
Howard played one of Magic Matt's talk ups where he was all serious and suggested that you never throw a snowball at a biker gang or something wacky like that. Howard asked Fred for a slow song so he could talk it up like Matt had just done. Fred did that and Howard talked it up just right. Artie said that he likes the talk up better than the song.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that guy gets him so pumped up that he wants to pull over and run the rest of the way to work.
The caller asked Howard about an Elvis Presley tape that they used to play on the show. Howard asked Fred if they still have that. Fred said he still plays it and he'd play it today.
Howard did some more talk ups telling some racist jokes at the start of the song. He then played the Elvis audio that the caller had requested a couple of minutes earlier. Howard was going to play that going to break because Kid Rock and Reverend Run were on their way up. In the Elvis clip he's laughing as he's singing ''Are You Lonesome Tonight'' because of the way the backup singer was singing. They went to break after that.
Kid came in with reverend Run from Run DMC. He said that he heard that Reverend Run had gotten all serious over the years. Howard played a clip for Kid where this German porn guy is going ''AwwwwwWWWWWW.'' They took his song ''Bawitdaba'' and threw that clip in.
Howard moved on to talk to Run and how he got hooked up with Kid. He said that it was probably his TV show that made him seem like he was worthy of going out on the road with him. He said that Kid had asked to hang out with him in the Hampton's so they did that. they were talking about flying around in their private planes and stuff and that led to Howard talking about how crazy Kid is. Kid said that he got into a fight in a Waffle House not too long ago.
Run said that Kid is pretty wild and he will punch people in the face if they piss him off. Howard said that Kid was going to buy everyone in the Waffle House their meals. Kid said that he was in a good mood because his record was number one. Some kid was there eating with his fingers and he was acting like a jerk. He said that he was telling him he was going to sue him as he was eating with his fingers. Kid said that he had offered to buy him his meal but he was being a jerk about everything.
Kid said that he went off on the guy calling him a pig and the guy told him to go ahead and hit him. He walked over to the guy and someone else kind of jumped in. He said the guy had a knife in his hand and one of his guys saw that so he jumped in. He said that the guy got kicked out and he was outside showing everyone his dick and telling everyone he was going to come back and kill them all.
Kid said that the guy dropped a big window on him too so he got scared and started throwing stuff at him. He said that this stuff seems to come in waves because this was shortly after his Tommy Lee incident at the MTV awards.
Howard said that it seems like Kid has an anger problem. Kid said that people just aren't nice and they try to provoke him so he gets pissed. Run was saying that he's tried to tell him to just stay calm in those situations but he can't seem to do that.
Howard asked Run how long he's been married. He said that he's been married since 1992. This is his second marriage but this one he's rockin'. Howard asked him about Kid's 2 month marriage to Pam Anderson. Run said that they don't talk that much about that. He said he has told Kid that he might want to think about settling down because he is with a lot of chicks.
Howard asked Kid if he's dating a 21 year old stripper. Kid said that he went out with this woman that he was talking about but she's not a stripper. Howard said he saw that he was making out with another actress, Gabrielle Union, but Kid said that wasn't true either. It was rumored that he was with Paris Hilton too but Run said that wasn't true either.
Howard asked who the chick was that he brought to the Grammy Awards. He said that was a friend of his and he thinks of her as his sister. He said that she does bathing suits and the suit that Spitzer's girl was wearing was one of her suits. Howard asked Kid if he's ever made love to a high priced prostitute. Kid said he hadn't.
Howard asked Run who is richer, him or his brother. Run said that Russell Simmons is richer than he is. He said that they share the wealth though.
Howard told Run that this guy High Pitch Mike, who works for them, loves his show so much that he let a transsexual sit on his face to win a big screen TV just so he could watch his show on a big screen. Run said that's pretty wild. Gary said that Mike wanted to watch the show in HD but it turns out the show isn't filmed in HD so Mike did all of that for no reason.
Howard asked Kid about how great his life is going and what he's worth now. He wondered if it was over $150 million. Kid said he's not worth that much. He said he wishes he was. Run said that Kid has some nice homes around the country. He has one apartment that has 3 floors and an elevator to go between the floors. He has a lot of acres out in Michigan too.
Howard asked Kid who he's dating now. He said he's just going out with some people. Howard asked about this one chick that he dated who was really hot. He didn't have an answer for that. Howard said that he was getting married again and Kid said that he'd love to see the pre-nup that he has with that chick.
Howard asked Kid about this hot chick and why he broke up with her. Kid said that he just wanted to stay in Michigan and she wanted to move to Hollywood so he said goodbye to her. He said that getting married was a great time but being married is what really sucked. Howard said he doesn't get why he'd break up with a hot chick like that though. Kid said that he should know, he's the one getting married again.
Run said that a few people have asked him why they should be married. He said that it's good to be with one person. He said that some people want to chill out and it can bring some stability to your life.
Howard said that he does look at other women when they come in there. He said that he's got a good thing going with Beth and he's not going to give that up.
Howard asked Run about this reverend thing and if he has a church. Run said that he doesn't have an actual church but people see him on TV and can follow him through his web site RevRun.com.
Run talked about how out of control he was in the past and how he was smoking weed and stuff for years. He said that he almost committed suicide at one point. He said that he had a lot of beer and weed and maybe a couple of sniffs of coke back then. He said that he got to a place where he figured there had to be more out there.
Run told Howard that he has a couple of books that he has coming out. He's got one out already called ''Words of Wisdom'' and another one coming out in august called ''Take Your Family Back.'' Kid said that it has to be better than that Britney Spears book that her mother put out. Howard thought that Kid had Britney but he said that wasn't him.
Run said that he finds it funny that he's on a channel that you wouldn't think he'd be on but the people keep coming back season after season.
Howard asked Run about the miscarriage that his wife had and why he'd want to put that on TV. Run said that he wanted to show something that showed what he has to go through and how he reacted to it. He said that they had a child, it wasn't a miscarriage. The child passed away. Run said that the people saw him mourn and regroup after that loss. He said they went out and adopted a child after that. Run said that he was showing how he talked to his kids about what happened.
Howard asked Run what happened to the child. He said that the organs were grown outside of the child. He said that he didn't get too deep into it and doesn't know what it's called. He said that they learned about other people who were going through the same thing.
Howard asked Run where he adopted this child. He said he didn't want to get into that. He said that it was here in America though. Howard asked run why his wife didn't get an abortion with this child that had the organs outside the body. He said that he just wanted to leg God handle it all. He thought that he'd be able to find out what to do through prayer and that led to him keeping it on TV.
Howard asked Run about the stuff he must see when he's hanging around Kid Rock. He said he must see him getting blow jobs and stuff but Run said that he doesn't do that.
Howard gave Kid Rock and Run some plugs for their shows that they have coming up. They start their Rock'n'Roll Revival Tour on April 4th. You can find out more at KidRock.com. Kid mentioned that J. Giles is going to be in the show. That led to Howard talking about him a little bit and how he should have stayed in his band instead of going out on his own.
Howard asked Run if he would let Kid Rock date his daughter. Run said ''Hell no!'' He asked Howard why he'd do something like that.
Gary said that High Pitch Mike was out there walking around looking nervous and wanting to meet Run. Howard told Gary to let him come in since Run didn't want to see him take a penis in his ear or anything like that.
Mike came in and told Run that he loves his show and the positive example it shows to families out there. mike said that he gets most of his spiritual advice from run's web site. He said that he's very down to earth and tells it like it is. He gets his daily word of wisdom but didn't have today's. He said that he had one that he used after his fight with Artie.
Mike said that it was something like ''Never give away your power to other people's opinions. What god thinks about you is what matters.'' Artie told Mike that it appears that God hates him. Howard said that he's not cool, he's got the high pitched voice and all of that. The guys showed Run and Kid the picture of Mike with Siobhan the Transsexual sitting on his face.
Mike asked Run what he thinks about this pastor that Barack Obama is friends with. Run said that he liked the speech that Barack made about the guy. He said that he thinks that pastor may have been speaking out in anger.
Kid said that he can't vote for Hillary so he's either going to go for Barackor John McCain. Howard told the guys that Barack can't win because he's made a bad decision about being friends with that racist preacher. He said that he's going to vote for Hillary Clinton and he has to support her.
Howard wrapped up with Run and Kid and gave them some more plugs for the upcoming tour. He asked Run about the death of his friend Jay. Run said that he's going to let a higher power deal with that and didn't have a lot to say about it. He said that the show they're doing at Madison Square Garden in April is going to be great.
Irish John called in and asked Run if OJ is innocent or guilty. Run didn't have an answer, he said they were about to end the show. He told him to go to his web site and get the daily word of wisdom thing. Kid told Howard about some of the stuff they're doing at the shows and Howard seemed to like what he was hearing.
Howard asked Kid if he's going to be picking out girls to have sex with after the show. Run said that they're going to have communion after the show and they won't be doing anything like that. He jokingly told Howard to end the interview there. Howard didn't do that and asked Run what the worst thing was he ever did with a woman. Run said that he's a married man and can't talk about that stuff.
Howard asked Run how he was going to kill himself. He thought about jumping out of a window but didn't want to get hurt. He thought about some other stuff but didn't get into too many details.
Howard mentioned that Ryan Phillippe was coming in next. He said that he just got a 4 star rating in the paper for this new movie ''Stop Loss'' that he's in. Kid said that he knows that there is terrible shit going on in this war but there are also a lot of great things going on over there too. He said that the soldiers don't talk about that because they're too proud of what they're doing. that led to Howard talking about his (fake) time in Vietnam. He said that he killed a lot of people over there. Robin let out a big laugh when he started to talk about that stuff. They went to break a short time later.
Howard asked Ryan when he started listening to the show. He said he was about 13 and Howard's voice is the one voice in his life that he's heard more than any other. Howard thought that he kind of blew him off at an event one time. Ryan said that Reese (Witherspoon) was probably the one who wasn't so warm to him.
Ryan said that he was on a class trip the day that Howard was doing his DeBella funeral and snuck over to see it. He said that he's been listening to the show every day and that's what's made him who he is now. Howard said that he likes that he's raised some kids like that who go on to be famous. Artie said that for every Ryan there are 10 guys working in gas stations.
Howard brought up this movie ''Stop Loss'' that Ryan is in. They spent a minute talking about what that movie is about before Howard changed subjects. Howard asked him about his marriage to Reese and how it seems like he's coming into his own now that he's not married to Reese anymore. Ryan said that he does just fine on his own.
Ryan brought up the scene that he did with Fred and how he heard that Fred was going to beat him up after he had to give him the finger in that scene. Howard said that Fred sometimes can't tell the difference between acting and reality.
Howard asked Ryan if he had a charmed life and did the acting thing in school. He said that he went to a Christian school so he didn't have any acting classes. Howard said it looked like Ryan's microphone was bothering him so he had him move it. He said he's never had any luck with microphones in the 30 years he's been doing radio.
Howard asked Ryan how he got into the acting thing. He said that his mother had a friend who suggested that he get into modeling or something. He said he wanted to be an actor though and that's what he ended up doing. He said that he didn't get laid when he was young. He said he was 17 before he got laid for the first time. He said that he didn't even get oral before then.
Howard asked Ryan about his first sexual experience. Ryan said that she was a bit older than him. He didn't get into too many details about that.
Howard was telling Robin how to pronounce Ryan's last name but he got it wrong. Ryan corrected him but Howard told him that he was wrong and insisted that was saying it the right way.
Howard said that he knew that he and Reese weren't going to last. Ryan said that they were both pretty young when they got married and they didn't know what to expect. Howard said that Reese is hot and he'd love to bang her. Ryan told him to go for it.
Howard said that it must be tough for him to do love scenes and not pop a rod. Ryan said that he has popped a rod, he is red blooded after all. He said he did a love scene with Salma Hayak so Howard figured he popped one there. He asked him if he does them nude. He said that he does do the scenes nude sometimes. He thinks that he did that with Salma. He said that it is kind of strange to do it and it's not very erotic. Howard said that he wouldn't be able to do a nude scene like that because he wouldn't want anyone seeing his ''button'' down there.
Howard asked Ryan about getting a full boner when he does the scenes and if he ever penetrates the women. Ryan said he's heard of that happening but he's never done that. Howard asked him if he feels her wetness against him. Ryan gave him a big ''Whoa, whoa...'' when he heard that.
Ryan told Howard about some of the other chicks he's had scenes with and mentioned Angelina Jolie. Howard asked him about her. Robin said that she seems to be the type who would be willing to go all the way in a sex scene to make it seem real. Ryan said that they were a bit younger back then. Howard asked him if she tugged on his junk in the scene. Ryan said that he didn't remember.
Howard told Ryan he's had too good of a life. Ryan said that it has been up and down. He said that he feels like he's Artie when he hears some of his stories. Howard mentioned that Artie hasn't stopped eating through this whole interview.
Howard asked Ryan more about the Angelina Jolie scene and if the passion ever carries over after the shoot. He said that it might for some people. Howard asked Ryan about a story he read about him making out with Britney Spears in a club last year. He denied that story and said that it's just not true. He said that if you are just in the vicinity with someone like that they'll link you to them.
Howard asked Ryan about Ashelee Simpson. Ryan said that he stood next to her in a club for a while but he wasn't there with her. Howard said that maybe she wanted him and asked why he'd turn her down. Ryan said that maybe some people just want to be linked to him and that's why the stories get out. He said that he doesn't want to be with people like that though.
Howard asked Ryan if he was friends with Heath Ledger. He said he knew him but wasn't that close. He said that he was a good guy and doesn't think that he was trying to hurt himself when he overdosed.
Ryan was telling Howard about how he was with Reese for 10 years and he's not used to being single. Howard said that Ryan is rumored to be with his co-star in ''Stop Loss.'' Ryan said that's what they're saying but that doesn't mean it's true.
Ryan mentioned that he had a movie out called ''Breach'' that came out last March and people seemed to forget all about it. Robin said that was a great movie too. Howard said he must have missed it somehow.
Howard asked Ryan how he remembers all of he is lines. Ryan said that he does it out of fear. Howard said that he couldn't even remember the lines in Private Parts and that movie was all about him.
Howard said that if he were Ryan he'd be picking people like this chick on the cover of Maxim magazine to date. He told Ryan that he should date this Sofia Vergara chick. Ryan joked that he'll do that when he gets out of there.
Ryan said he was talking to Clint Eastwood about the stuff he used to get away with in the past before the tabloids all came out. They didn't follow him around back in the day when he was getting chicks.
Howard said that he thinks that Ryan just got married too young and maybe if he had met Reese when he was in his 30s, they'd last longer. Ryan said that they have great kids together. He said that his parents were married but he didn't say ''happily'' when he mentioned that. He said that they did struggle with the family because they had 4 kids and not a lot of money. Howard said that his conversation with his parents about dropping Reese must have been tough.
Howard talked about how his conversation went with his parents about his divorce. He said that his father told him that if he got horny he should go to a hooker. He thought that was kind of odd. Ryan said that he and Reese both agreed that they should break up. He said that it was a mutual thing and they had been spending a lot of time apart before they made that decision.
Ryan talked about some of the great directors that he's worked with so far. His first film was with Ridley Scott and he's worked with Clint Eastwood and others.
Howard said that Beth is going to the premiere of this movie tonight. He told Ryan not to steal her from him. He went on to give him some more plugs for the movie. Artie said that he's seen a lot of his movies and really liked a lot of the stuff he's been in.
Howard asked Ryan what kind of money he's making these days. He figured it was about 5 million and Ryan said that he does get offers like that. Howard asked Ryan what movies he's turned down that have been really big. He said he was close to getting Anakin Skywalker in the newer Star Wars movies but he's kind of glad he didn't get that part now that he's seen them.
Howard asked Ryan who he's hanging out with. He said that he has a couple of friends who are really big fans of Howard's. Howard said that he had a pussy posse of his own when he was single. They'd go out and pick up chicks just about every night. Howard told Ryan to hang out with Leonardo DiCaprio and maybe this comedian Gallagher. Ryan said that the only actor in his posse is Breckin Meyer. Howard didn't know who that was but Robin did.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that he was in the service and ended up getting called back into Iraq. Ryan talked about how authentic they tried to keep the movie and said that they had a few soldiers that they were working with.
Another caller said he liked hearing that this guy was a big fan of the show and a true fan. He said that he's not forgetting about the show either. Howard said that Ryan is proud to be a fan too. Ryan said that if he ever wins an Oscar, he would be willing to bring it in and let them use it in any way they wanted. He said that the statue is kind of sharp though.
Howard asked Ryan a few Stern questions to find out just how much of a fan he is. He knew all of the answers. He said that he tried to order one of those Beetlejuice busts that Howard has but he never got it after plunking down the $250 that they were asking for. Howard said that was probably just a mistake and he'd see if they could take care of that.
Howard asked Ryan a few more questions and stumped him on some stuff. He knew JD's name but didn't know where his mother ran off to. Howard had JD come in so Ryan could meet him. He told Ryan that JD has had the opposite life as he has.
Howard told Ryan about how JD got screwed over the other night when he went out to see a chick that he was talking to on the web. He got turned away from the club because he was too nerdy. Ryan said that he should have dropped Howard's name. JD said he doesn't like doing that.
Howard talked about going to Studio 54 one time but he wasn't cool enough to get into the VIP area. He was just in the regular area.
Howard took another call from a woman who asked Ryan to take his shirt off so they can take some pictures and put them up on the web. She said that she would love that. She said that she's 43 years old though so Artie gave her a buzzer sound for having the wrong answer. Ryan said he probably wouldn't date anyone over 30 at this point.
Howard asked Ryan when he realized that Robin was not a white woman. He said he knew pretty early on. He said that he wasn't shocked by that. He said that black people don't shock him. He said that he's a Barack Obama supporter too. He and Robin talked about that a little bit. Howard said that some people think he's against Obama because he's black but that's a bunch of horse shit. He said if he was that screwed up he wouldn't be able to vote for a woman either. Howard said that his daughters are really for Obama but that's not going to change his mind.
A woman called in and asked Ryan if he's ever been with any black women. Howard and the guys guessed before he answered and figured he had. They were right. Ryan said that he's been with at least one. Howard asked him if he'd make love to an amputee. He said that he might. He was laughing when he said it so Howard figured he was lying but he said he was just wondering if it would ever come up in his life.
A caller asked Ryan if he ever got in Sarah Michelle Gellar's back door. Ryan said he never got in her back door, no.
Howard asked Ryan about some of the movies he's done and Ryan mentioned that he really liked doing ''The Way of The Gun.'' Artie told a story about seeing that movie and how there were 4 people in the theater. He said that Ice T and his wife and kid were in there with him. He said that Ice T would laugh and say ''Haha mutha fuckahhhh'' whenever anyone would get shot.
A caller told Howard that he really is a great interviewer because he thought Ryan was a douche bag until he heard this interview. That led to Artie saying that he and Ryan have similar issues too. Howard asked Ryan if he's into the drug thing like Artie was. He said it's not about that, it's about other personal issues like depression and stuff. Howard asked him if he ever did coke while dressed in a pig outfit. Ryan said he never has but the first time he heard that story he almost ran off the road laughing.
Ryan said that he's had some dark thoughts in the past but he's doing fine now. Artie told him that the darkest place he ever went was the black chick's ass. Howard asked him what turned it around for him. He didn't get a chance to answer. Howard said that it must have been when he got to bang Jennifer Love Hewitt. Ryan said he never did that. He said that he did think about it but her mother was always around and he never got a chance. Artie said that he had a chance to get a shot on her sitcom years ago but they told him he'd have to interview with her mother so he turned it down.
Howard took another call from a guy who said that his buddy just went on his 7th tour of Iraq. He said that his girlfriend is pregnant and he had other buddies who have killed themselves after getting back from over there.
Howard took one last call for Ryan. It was Beetlejuice's manager Bobby and he was going to look into it and find out what happened with the bust that he ordered. He said that they keep files of all of that stuff. Howard said that he's pretty sure that he paid for the head and he should just send him one. He said that if he can't get him the head he will give him a refund. Ryan said that he'd rather not travel with the head. Bobby said that they have a cast of his penis available now too so he could get him that. Ryan wasn't interested in that either.
Howard Bobby go and wrapped up with Ryan after giving him some plugs for his new movie. Ryan said that he really wants to come in again. Howard told him he used to think he was a douche bag but this interview changed his mind. He went to break a short time later.
Artie asked if Howard thinks that he could have won if they didn't know him and he came in with Dana. Howard said that he's not that ugly. He said that he's seen a lot uglier dudes out there who have hot wives. He said he knew a guy when he was 16 who was a troll but he had a big cock and a lot of coke so he was able to get chicks. He said that he got an incredibly hot chick and they could never figure that out.
Howard said that Mike Walker was on the line so he said that today is the second anniversary of the day they caught Mike farting off the air on the microphone. He played the audio of that fart but Mike was denying that he did it. He said that he thinks that Richard could have made that up on his own. Howard said that it's no big deal.
Richard came in and said that he'd swear on anything that the tape of Mike farting was real. They also caught him playing bongo off the air. He played that and then the Run DMC remix with those clips thrown into that. Mike said that he never heard the prank call they made using those clips of him calling a phone sex line. Howard played another call where they had this woman on the line really confused about what was going on. That wasn't the one that Mike was looking for so Howard played the one he was talking about. In that one they have clips of Mike call a phone sex line and he keeps doing this sheep ''Baaa'' sound and the woman plays along with it and pretends to be getting off to it.
Mike was trying to remember what those clips came from. Richard remembered where they came from and told Mike what they were. Howard said he was just happy that it was the second anniversary of that infamous fart.
Howard had Mike get to his game so here's how it goes. Each week Mike Walker calls in with four gossip stories. Three of the stories are from his National Enquirer gossip column. One of the stories is false. Everyone tries to pick out the false story. The stories will appear in Mike's gossip column each week after he plays with Howard. Here are this week's stories:
Howard took a phone call from a woman who said that she loves his show. She hadn't heard the show in years and loved the interview that he did with Ryan. Howard thanked her for the nice comments and cut her off.
Jon Hein came in with his Wrap Up Show preview. He ran down the subjects they were going to be covering today. I'll have more on that later.
Mutt called in and said that he has an update on the Ryan problem with the Beetlejuice head. He said that he was told that they don't have anymore heads but they're going to try and scrounge one up for him. They didn't ship out the last 9 of them because the company they were dealing with kind of screwed them over.
Mutt ran down the stuff they were going to be going over on this week's Superfan Roundtable show. He said they're going to talk about Robin and how people are attacking her lately and about her new GNO thing. The guys spent a few minutes talking about that before Howard had them move on.
Howard took a call from Bong Hit Eric who said that today was a great show. He said he really enjoyed it thoroughly. He wondered if Ryan had ever stuck a wooden spoon up Reese's ass. Artie said that Howard must have forgotten to ask that question.
Robin had a story about Maxim Magazine naming Sarah Jessica Parker the most unsexy woman in America. Howard said he doesn't agree with that at all. He said that she might not be the sexiest but she isn't the most unsexy. He said that this was an unfair statement. He thinks that she should cut off that mole on her face though. Robin read through some of the other names on the list as well. Artie said that he could really find the unsexiest down at the port authority building there in New York City.
Howard gave his thoughts on the names that Robin was mentioning on that list. He felt that most of the women on that list were pretty sexy and not the most unsexy.
Robin mentioned that Donald Trump is hiring Heather Mills to be a judge on one of his pageants. Howard said he can't imagine why he would do that. No one likes that woman.
Artie asked Howard if he would ever host the MTV awards show if they gave him some really cool way to do it. Howard said there's a very slim chance but he really doesn't think he would. He said that the hosts usually look like douche bags on those shows. He said that he wouldn't host the Oscars either. He said he would accept an Oscar but not host. He said years ago he would have done it but now he won't because he doesn't want to be embarrassed.
Robin read a story about Shia Labeouf getting a ticket for smoking in an illegal spot. Howard said he's glad that happened because smoking is the dumbest thing in the world and he doesn't want to have to suck in that second hand smoke. Artie said that kids are going to look less and less cool as the years go by if that's the way things are going to go. Howard said he supports it and the police who are issuing those tickets.
Robin read a story about Ellen Degeneres who is going to be hosting Idol Gives Back. Howard said that she is the worst host ever. He said she's got this shtick where she acts confused. He did an impression of her doing her thing and talking about how annoying it was. He said that she should just get up and say what's on her mind. She's not befuddled, she's acting befuddled and not even acting well. He said he's tired of that act.
Howard asked why Ryan Seacrest isn't hosting the show. Howard said that the Idol Gives Back show is horrible too. He said that they're not giving anything back, they take money from the fans so that they look good. He said that he doesn't want all of these telethon shows on the air. She read about the bands that were going to be on that Idol Gives Back special.
Robin brought up the story about the woman who had a guy whack off into her hair on a flight recently. Howard said that he'd kill a guy if someone did something like that to him. He said he'd go to jail for something like that, he doesn't care.
Artie said that one time he was in a car with a few people and tried to throw his cigarette out the window of the car and it ended up in a chick's hair. He said that he was afraid to pull it out so it ended up burning her head.
Howard said that your load can end up in strange places. He said that one time Beth took care of him in a non traditional way and the load ended up going all over the place. He said that they couldn't even believe where it ended up going. He said that it's very powerful when it comes out but it's not that much.
Artie was telling some shit stories and how he finds shit all over the place in his toilet and that kind of freaks him out. Howard cut him off so he didn't get into too much detail. Fred was still playing the Beavis and Butt-Head laughs that he started playing earlier in the morning.
Robin said she had another load story. This one was about a guy who was masturbating in a Target store. The guy hit a woman who was shopping with her 3 year old child.
Robin brought up the pictures that have been floating around the web of a woman who could be Kristin Davis. She denies it but some people believe that they really are her. Robin said there are some new nude photos of another celebrity that are out there now too. Howard asked Robin if she ever did any nude photo shoots. She claims she hasn't. Fred did his Jim Florentine impression and said that she just doesn't know about it.
Artie said that he found a ball of shit in his bathroom and he figured it had to have come flying out of his ass to get where it was. Howard told him he was disgusting. Artie asked where he was on that unsexy list and laughed at himself.
Robin read a story about the guy who let his wife sit on the toilet for 2 years and get stuck to the seat. She had a story about Osama bin Laden speaking out about some Prophet Mohammed cartoons that have been out. Howard said that he likes that John McCain is saying that he will find bin Laden if he's elected President.
Robin read some news about Hillary Clinton possibly being in the White House when her husband was getting other chicks. They spent a short time goofing on that story. Robin read through some other stories about the President's latest speech about the Iraq war. She had some other stuff about Barack Obama and his latest comments about the war.
Robin had a few other news stories and one of them was about Naomi Watts' latest movie where she gets tied up naked. Howard said he didn't know what movie that was but he has to see it based on that story. Robin talked about a remake of the movie ''The Birds.'' Howard said that's a waste of time because the original was so great.
Robin read a story about a cop who was charged with rape. Howard said that he knows people who know that guy's wife and he feels bad for her. Robin had a clip of her saying that she believes that he's 100 percent innocent. Robin wrapped up a short time later.
Robin said that she got a message from Brent from Bubba's show who was telling her that the friend of Brooke Hogan's who her father was messing around with wasn't her age, she was 33 years old. It wasn't one of her school friends or anything like that. Howard said that 33 sounds a little old for Hulk and maybe he was just throwing her a bone. Robin said that Brent was telling her how good she looks too so she thinks that he's a little hot for her. Howard wrapped up the show around 11:10am.
Jon said that Ryan actually knew who he was and that surprised him. He said that he was obviously a big fan of the show.
Mike said that run talks about how those words of wisdom that he sends out go to people at big business and stuff. Gary came in and said that he has no proof of that. He said that he doesn't think that there was a clamoring for that thought of the day thing.
Mike said that Gayle King was getting it and sharing it with Oprah. He said they showed that on an episode of Run's TV show.
Jon played a clip of Mike talking to Run about the words of wisdom and what they mean to him. That led to Artie talking about how it seems like God hates Mike.
Mike said that Run has gone through a lot of stuff in his life and he's still on top of the world. He's inspired by him. Artie was in by that point and the two of them said that they're done fighting with each other. that led to Artie saying that he won't joke about him being a fag anymore even when he brings up a story about watching Oprah Winfrey.
Mike said that on Monday morning he saw the mother of a kid who was killed for being gay and he thinks that Artie would find that story funny. Artie said that just because he calls Mike gay doesn't mean that he's happy about a gay kid getting killed. the guys backed Artie up on that and said that Artie never said he would approve of something like that.
Mike asked Gary about losing his brother, who was gay, and if he feels awkward hearing Artie using that word. Gary said that he thinks that Artie is just joking around and not gay bashing when he does that. Jon said that it comes down to intent and it's Artie breaking balls and he knows that it gets under his skin. Artie said that it gets under his blotchy skin, that's why he does it.
Artie said that he got that 44 percent approval from the fans and now the offers are flying in for him. Mike wasn't looking at Artie so Jon asked him if it was hard to look at him. Artie said that it's hard for him to look at anyone, look at him.
Artie and Mike went at each other for a short time. Mike said that he'd really open it up if he wanted to. Mike said that he'd push if he wanted him to. He brought up the check thing where Artie got to see Gary's paycheck. Artie said he was trying to protect someone else with that story.
Mike said that when Artie does this stuff it upsets a lot of other people out there. Artie said that those 44 percent of people who like him on the show probably like him because he goofs on Mike. Mike brought up the gay kid thing again. Artie told him to keep bringing those stories up because he has compassion for those kids. When he goofs on Mike for being a fag, he's just goofing on Mike, not on anyone else.
Artie said that the people who killed Matthew Sheppard should burn in hell in his opinion. He doesn't think that's right to kill someone just because they're gay. He said that just because he says ''fag'' doesn't mean he thinks that gay people should be killed.
Jon said that Artie and Mike have a thing that's kind of like Jason and Scott DePace's hatred but 10 times worse.
Artie said that he's not sure how this started but he thinks that Mike was the one who came out with more lethal stuff about him than he ever did. Jason said he thinks that he did it by doing those Mike Minute things on Howard 100 News. Jason said that Mike takes it to a place that it shouldn't go. He took Artie calling him a fag to going off on his sister and his dead father.
Mike had walked out by that time so they were just talking about him without him being able to defend himself. Jon told him he was welcome to come back in though.
A caller told Artie that he was like a lion bouncing a kitten around between his paws with this thing. Artie said that he knows but that stuff he's said about his sister just isn't cool. He said that stuff really gets to him and he will attack if he's attacked.
Jon said that Mike seemed to hold his own the last time he fought with him but today Artie kind of crushed him.
Another caller said that he thinks that Artie is joking when he says the fag stuff. Gary said that it's easy to say that when you're not gay. He said that it gets kind of weird when Artie says that he wants Mike to die of AIDS. The caller pointed out that Artie doesn't call George Takei a fag either so it's not like he does that to all gay people.
Artie said that he doesn't have any hatred toward anyone just because of their being gay. He said that he hates people for their individual traits and Mike has a few that annoy him. Jason said that Artie has called him a fruit a few times and that's almost like calling him a fag. He just takes it though.
Artie said that his sister heard the show that day when Mike brought her up and she called him crying. He said that really pissed him off and he's not going to take that shit from Mike. He said he can't have compassion for that guy.
Jon took another call from a guy who said that he has to take Artie's side in this. He said that it seems like Mike spends too much time thinking about this. He told Artie to call him a fag so he did. The guy shot back with ''Fuck you! You fat bastard...'' Artie told him to go easy on the fat jokes but he got his point about how that's the way Mike should deal with it.
Artie was glad that he chased Mike out of there and ruined his Reverend Run discussion. Jason said he was glad about that too.
The guys talked about the Reverend Run stuff and that led to Artie talking about how that rap stuff was just starting to hit big back when he was graduating high school. The guys spent a few minutes on that subject talking about some of the great songs Run DMC had.
They spent a few minutes talking about the difference between Hip Hop and Rap too. They were kind of confused about the meanings of the two so they pulled it up on the web and found some info. The rap is the music and Hip Hop is the culture.
Jon took a call from a guy who was complaining about Artie not knowing the names of some of the team players out there now. Artie said that's because he used to know the teams back when he was growing up when he had all the time in the world to learn them. Now he's not that familiar with them.
Jon took some more phone calls and had the fans talking to Artie about the hip hop and rap things. Jon had to go to break a short time later.
Gary said that it was great that he had ordered that Beetlejuice bust and never got it. Gary said that he even knew who Lisa Lampanelli was because of the show and saw her on a flight out from L.A.
Gary said that one of the sales guys went down with him in the elevator and he was all excited about all of the people that he met when he was up there. He said that he was acting like a fan who had won a tour of the studio or something.
Jon asked if he thinks that Ryan is an underrated actor. Gary said that he didn't think so until he saw the list of movies that he's done. He said that he's been in a lot of great ones. Benjy said he didn't know that he spoke in that ''wiggerish'' way that he was this morning. He wondered if that was because of that upbringing in Philly. Gary said he was raised in Delaware, not Philly.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he had a new respect for Ryan after that interview. He said he didn't know that he was such a Stern fan. He said that he's going to go see that movie of his now that he has this new found respect for him.
Benjy said that Ryan said that of all of the voices he's heard in his life he's heard Howard's the most. He thought that was interesting. Gary said that they had Ben Affleck call in one time and he turned out to be a good interview. He was a fan of the show and when people like that call in it shows another side of them that you wouldn't normally see.
Jon played a clip of Ryan talking to Howard about what he'd be willing to do with an Oscar if he ever wins one. Benjy asked Gary if he can think of anyone who they thought wouldn't be a douche on the show but they turned out to be a big douche. Gary didn't have any names.
Jon asked Gary who has surprised him most as being a fan of the show. He said it was Tom Hanks who recognized Stuttering John one time when he did an interview with him.
Jon was going to talk about Dee Snider but the end of the show music came up. He quickly talked about Dee with Gary but he had to end the show. Gary said that his favorite part of the show today was when Artie talked about the shit pellet he found in his bathroom. They ended the show a short time later.
Howard started off the show trying to say the word venerable. He said hello to everyone in the studio and wondered where to begin with the show. Robin told him to begin where he left off last. She asked him to talk about what happened since then. Howard said that he was on The Late Show with Arsenio Hall, someone he really doesn't like. He said that you shouldn't go on a TV interview show with someone who is trying to be funny. He said he had a lot to talk about today.
Robin said that she flew into Los Angeles and woke up in the middle of the night and wondered why he was doing that show. Howard said that he's not sure either. He said they have a lot of stuff to go over today. He asked why Dominic Barbara, Jessica Hahn's lawyer, was in the other room. Gary said he was showing Scott some videotape.
Howard said that Jessica Hahn was watching him on a TV show and now she wants to speak with them today. He said that Arsenio was asking him about her and he was defending her again like he has before. He said that just because she takes her top off doesn't mean that she wasn't raped.
Howard told Gary to have Dominic stop in before he leaves. He and Robin spent a minute talking about getting kicked off of the FOX building while he was out there in L.A. over the weekend. He said that he not only got thrown out of the building but he was supposed to be back on the show that night but the other half wanted him thrown out.
Howard said that he got the key to the city but then they took it back. He said that there's a lot of stuff going on and he's supposed to do the Maurey Povich show with Jessica Hahn but that's on FOX and he's not sure if he'll be able to do it.
Howard said he called Robin and asked her if she thought it was bad that he got thrown off the FOX channel. She thought it was great because they continued to talk about him even after he was thrown off. Howard said that FOX has no sense of humor at all.
Howard said he wanted to tell Robin all of this off the air but he wanted to keep it fresh for this morning. Robin said that Arsenio is the first black man that she's ever seen who looks bad in leather pants. Howard said that had something to do with him getting kicked off but he'd get to that later.
Howard went through a commercial (with the sponsor censored out with fart sounds) as Dominic was coming in. He told him he looks kind of like Andy Devine with a diploma. Dominic was asking him how much it would cost to get him in Hustler magazine. He said he'd negotiate the deal for him.
Howard talked to Dominic about this interview he's doing with Jessica today. Dominic told him he was going to get more time with her than most people would. He said that he thinks that she wants Howard to talk to her family because he seems to know how to handle family matters like that.
Dominic said he saw Howard get kicked off the show the other night and felt bad for him. He spent a minute on that before Howard got back to his live commercial to finish that up.
Howard finished up his live commercial and talked to Dominic about what's going on with Jessica Hahn. Dominic said he brought by a bunch of tape of some interviews he did with a few people regarding that case. Howard let him go a short time after that.
Howard said that one of the guests was a black guy from South Africa and a black actress that he had never heard of before. She was on Night Court and he really had no idea who she was. It was an all black show except for him.
Howard also said that the audience wasn't full either. He said there was a whole section that was empty because who is going to go see Arsenio Hall? He said that his opening jokes weren't funny but the audience was still wooing and hooting at him. He said it reminded him of going to a black theater to see a movie.
Howard said he felt like he was set up for that show. He said it felt like being on a ship and going down with it as it sunk. He didn't plan on being that outrageous. He just wanted to be interviewed. He said he tried to walk off at one point but they took him and threw him back into his seat.
Howard talked about how Arsenio seems to be trying to be just like his pal Eddie Murphy and it's just not working. He said that Arsenio kept saying that he was making more money than he was and it was like he was obsessed with that. Howard said that he's a radio guy so of course he's not going to be making that kind of money.
Howard said that Arsenio was doing that black accent that was so lame and he wanted to tell him he was offending him with that. Robin said that it's as bad as her black accent. Howard said he was sitting there thinking that the show was so lame that he wanted to get out of there. Meanwhile the audience was yelling stuff out at him. Gary said that he was getting heckled through the whole show.
Howard said that you never see white people heckling black people like that on a show. He said that he did mention Oprah at one point and got some applause. He said that she's doing a new thing on her show where she sits around eating her lunch with some friends. Robin said that's what Ronna Barrett used to do on her show.
Howard talked about the red eye flight he had home from Los Angeles and how Gary slept through the whole thing. He said he wanted someone to talk to but Gary slept right through it. He told Gary that he hates him for that and called him a Bad Breath Bastard. He said that Gary woke up at one point and smacked his choppers and asked for some water. Howard did his impression of him doing that and said that he knocked himself back out with his own breath. He ended up passing right out again after that.
Howard said that he slept through the whole movie that they were watching. That was the movie ''Malone'' and Howard said he kind of liked it. He said it wasn't so bad for an airline movie.
Howard said that he had tape from the interview and he wanted to go through that. Robin asked him if he saw Arsenio before he went on to do the interview. Howard said he didn't. He said that they ended up backing him up against a wall during that show and he did what he had to do.
Howard played the intro that Arsenio did for him on his show that night. Arsenio was reading off his cue cards and telling the audience he should see what they actually say. The audience was cracking up at everything he said even though it wasn't funny.
Howard said that the audience was yelling stuff out through the whole interview and telling him to get out of there and things like that. He felt like he was being yelled at by Paul Simon's band or something. It's really distracting too because he's trying to concentrate and they're screaming at him.
Howard said that he heard he was edited on that show when they aired it in Los Angeles. He said that anything that they found offensive was taken right out. Gary said that he thinks they took out the Edgar Rosenberg reference. Howard said he wasn't sure why they'd do that.
Howard played more of the audio from the interview and said that the only reason he got applause was because Arsenio called him his ''main man'' in his opening introduction.
Howard said he had to go to break but they had a new traffic reporter that he ended up talking about instead. Gary said that her name was Candy. They spent a few seconds on that. Howard also said that he was trying to find out from Gary if he felt something bad had happened right after that show and he didn't think anything bad had happened. Gary said that he hadn't had a lot of sleep out there so he may have been kind of out of it. They went to break a short time later.
Howard got back to the Arsenio tape and played through more of it. He kept interrupting the clips to talk about what was going on with FOX at the time. He said that he asked his agent what he thought of the interview and his agent shot back with ''Well, what did you think?'' He said his father was also saying that it wasn't his best appearance. He agreed with that but it may have been the most interesting one.
Howard said he told his Dad he thought it went okay because he did get some stuff out there that he wanted to get out there. He said that his agent told him that he should have a contingency plan for situations like that. Howard said that he didn't know he was supposed to be like General Patton there. He didn't know he was going into battle. He said he was just supposed to be interviewed but the guy had no good questions and kept doing that weird black impression.
Howard played more of the tape where he tells Arsenio that it's great to be part of a failing show. Arsenio kind of laughed and then the audience laughs. He said that Arsenio has to throw in his black comments to get the audience riled up. He said that the guy just isn't funny and even Joe Piscopo would get more laughs.
Howard said that he had no way of winning on that show with the audience acting the way they were. He said the show was like Amos and Andy with a band.
Howard played more of the audience hooting over him whenever he'd try to talk. In one clip Howard was talking to Arsenio about his name and he mentioned something about his mother and Arsenio freaks out and says ''Don't talk about my mother'' and the audience goes crazy. Howard said he wanted to get out of there around that point because the guy wasn't being funny but the audience was going crazy.
Howard didn't know what that hooting was about either. The audience was still going crazy 30 seconds after he told him not to mention his mother. Howard was trying to get to a list of something and Arsenio was still doing this weird thing about his mama.
Howard said that he was just sitting there thinking about how unfunny that stuff was that he was doing. He was getting annoyed by it all. He played more audio of the interview and said that it's like one of those morning zoo shows where people cackle and laugh over stuff that's just not funny.
Howard said that he wanted to get up and leave at that point but he ended up shoving him back into his chair so he couldn't leave. Then Howard started to go off on FOX about how he'd never do a show for them and he thought that they'd be off the air in about 6 months or so.
Howard and Arsenio talked about why Howard didn't like the network. Howard said that they decided against his TV show even after they told him they wanted one. He then said that he wouldn't be surprised if FOX drove Edgar Rosenberg to his death. Howard said that he was trying to push Arsenio as far as he could to see if he could make him lose his mind.
Howard said that Arsenio was looking around like he didn't know what to do at that point. He said that he had his own questions written and gave them to Arsenio to ask him. He had a question about Rupert Murdoch coming to this country just so he could own a TV network. The audience laughed so Howard figured that they only laughed because they didn't know that he was the one who wrote the question. He said that the audience was real thick and had no idea what was going on.
Howard asked Arsenio why he didn't own a network and then the audience goes crazy cheering for him as if they thought that he would own one some day.
Howard recapped what they had gone over so far and then got back to the tape. He played more of Arsenio asking him questions that he had written for him. The audience booed at one of the questions. Arsenio blamed that on Howard since he had written the question.
Howard said that Arsenio told him during the break that it was good stuff. He said that they went to a break and Arsenio was going nuts trying to find out what he was supposed to do with him. They came back from break Arsenio mentioned they had Marsha Warfield coming on the show. Howard said he didn't know who she was and the audience seemed offended by that. So did Arsenio. He asked Howard if he even had a TV. Howard said that he does. then he said that he was going to joke that he doesn't steal TVs like him but he didn't want to get into racial stereotypes. He said that Arsenio was doing that himself so he didn't want to go there.
Howard mentioned Oprah's name at one point and got some applause. Then he went off on Phil Donahue and got some applause when he bad mouthed him. He said that the reactions were all kind of weird.
Howard said the crowd was really weird and he wasn't able to work anything. He played another clip where Arsenio asked him about Jessica Hahn and Howard defended her. Arsenio was throwing out a few other subjects for him to talk about but the interview was going nowhere.
Howard said that Peter Callabrese was telling him that he'd love Arsenio. He thought he was out of his mind. Howard played more of the interview and talked about how lame it was being interviewed by that guy. He kept saying that he seemed to be trying to be just like his buddy Eddie Murphy but he's really nothing like him. Howard stopped the tape and said he'd talk more about getting thrown out after the break.
Howard asked her how she was doing and said he didn't believe that it was her. She said that this has been 2 years in the making and she finally came in. She said that she had just gotten back from going all across the country in a bus.
Howard asked Whoopi how he was looking. She said that she expected a short, balding guy and didn't expect to see this tall white guy. She thought that he was oriental or something too.
Whoopi was in to promote the Cops and Robbers movie ''Fatal Beauty.'' Robin said that she saw the movie. She didn't say what she thought about it though. Whoopi said that it's good though.
Howard talked to Whoopi about the movie and how they cut out some of her stuff. She said that they cut out her love scene with Sam Elliot. She said that they show her waking up in bed with him but not the love scene. She told Howard what they had done and what was cut. Howard said that he'd do a love scene with her if he had the chance.
Whoopi said that she didn't know what Robin looked like and no one warned her that she was black. She said that was a huge surprise to her. She said that she hasn't seen a lot of black women in radio.
Howard talked to Whoopi about her family and mentioned that she's married to a white guy. She asked him about what went on over there at FOX so Howard got into that a little more. He said that he think that Rupert Murdoch gave up on his TV deal after the FCC fines came out against him. He said that he probably didn't want to deal with him after that so they dropped the show that they were going to do.
Howard said that he went on that Arsenio's show and brought up Joan Rivers' husband's name and that ended up getting edited out of the West Coast airing of the show. They spent a minute talking about that.
Howard and Whoopi were also talking about the photographers out there who chase them down to get pictures in the strangest places. Whoopi talked about having a woman follow her into a bathroom one time. Howard said that he and Fred followed Arnold Schwarzenegger into a bathroom one time and talked to him while he was taking a dump.
Howard talked about the shows they did out in Los Angeles and Whoopi was kind of upset they didn't call her while they were out there. Howard said that she could only stick around for a little while so he was going to take a break and get to some phone calls. He asked Whoopi where she's going after this show, Regis? She said that she doesn't do that one. Howard got upset when he mentioned that Regis' show is going national in syndication. He said he can't win and wonders when his show is going national.
After an edited out break Howard came back and talked to Whoopi about her cars since he was in the middle of a live commercial. Whoopi was talking about her old Porsches and why she doesn't like the newer cars. Howard finished up his commercial a short time later.
Howard got back to Whoopi and told Arsenio to eat his heart out. Whoopi had said that she didn't even know who that was earlier. Howard went to the phones a short time later and let some fans ask her some questions. One guy said that he saw her movies and liked what he had seen. He said that he wanted to know where she was from and how she came on the scene so fast. Howard ended up cutting the guy off after Whoopi said that she was from New York.
Howard let a few more people ask Whoopi some questions. They talked about her breasts a little bit and she was saying that she's losing the battle with her breasts to gravity.
Howard told Whoopi about how he and his wife aren't having all that much sex now. He said it's like once a month now even though they were having it almost every day in the beginning. He told Whoopi that she'll probably end up the same way eventually.
Howard said he saw that Dominic Barbara was there and figured that Jessica was there. Gary said that Dominic wanted to give a copy of Jessica's Playboy to Whoopi. Whoopi said that this doesn't make things easy for her case.
Howard talked to Whoopi about her fear of flying and how she had come out to New York on a bus. She and Howard both have a fear of flying but Howard said that he will fly if he has to. He said that he always thinks that he's going to die flying somewhere but things worked out going out to L.A.
Howard told Whoopi that he's looking to get a nose job but she told him not to do it or she'll come and smack his face down. Howard started to wrap up with Whoopi but she asked about the FCC problems he's had. He said he really doesn't care about anything anymore and he just wants to be taken off the air. He ended the interview a short time later and went to break.
Gary said that Dominic Barbara asked Whoopi if she wanted to be in Playboy when she was leaving. He said that Whoopi responded with an ''F-no'' and said that she didn't want to do that.
Dominic Barbara came in a short time later. Howard had Jessica Hahn on the phone after that. He said that this was a special thing that Dominic had arranged. He told Dominic how great her pictures were in Playboy and asked if she has talked about being into him. Dominic said that she actually has. Robin said that's pretty good for Howard.
Howard picked up on Jessica and said that they hadn't spoken in a long time. She said that she really misses him. Howard said that he was reading what her mother said and told Jessica not to be hurt by that. He said that what she did was perfectly legitimate. He said that it doesn't lessen her credibility at all. He said that taking her top off is her choice and that's fine to do. He said that most parents are the biggest pain in the ass. He said that if they all listened to their parents they'd all be in trouble and never make it big. Jessica said that she loves her parents though and she has no problem with that.
Howard told her she looks gorgeous in this layout. She said that they mention Howard in the second part of that layout that's coming out. She talked about what she said about him and how that all came about.
Howard told Jessica to go out and try to make all the money she can now. He doesn't see a problem with it at all. Jessica said that she's tired of what people think about her and she's just not going to pay attention to it. Howard told Jessica that he thinks of her as one of his friends and Jessica agreed and said that he's one of her best friends.
Howard said that he heard that Jessica was going on all of these talk shows like Phil Donahue's. He said that he doesn't want her breaking down and crying on that show and giving him that kind of thing. She said that she wished that she could have seen him when he was out in L.A. Howard said that he had no way to get in touch with her when he was out there.
Howard asked Jessica what she's doing for a home now. She said that she's trying to make a decision about that. He told her to make sure she keeps some of this money that she's making now. He told her to try and live off of the interest she earns instead of spending the principal. He gave her some advice on what to invest in. She said that she can't wait to meet him. Howard said that Tuesday is going to be a great day when he finally does get to meet her.
Howard and Robin talked to Jessica about how much they like her and how down to earth she seems to be. Robin said that she sees a girl next door type of look when she sees those pictures of her. Howard said that he saw stains on those pictures when he was looking at them.
Howard said that Jessica sounds like she's gotten a little more happy over the time he's known her. He said that she doesn't sound as sad as she used to. She said that she is happier now that she's done with testifying in the case. She said that it's such a relief to get the story out there and let them know what really happened.
Dominic said that they have a lot of offers to do advertising and stuff like that around the world. He said they have offers from Japan and other countries as well. Howard said that he's glad that they met and that he got a hold of her when he did.
Jessica is now out in Los Angeles and said that she met Hugh Hefner and he's a very nice man. Howard talked to her about that stuff a little bit.
Howard said he heard that he was going to be on A Current Affair with Jessica. Dominic said that they want Howard and Jessica to do an interview. Howard said that he'll do it if she wants him to. He's worried about her and he wants to do what he can to make her feel safe. She said that this whole thing has helped her feel better about herself.
Howard said that Dominic had some notes about Jessica so he asked about something that he had written down. They ended up talking about her going down to South Carolina and how well she was treated even though she expected the worst.
Dominic said that they're going around to a bunch of shows doing a promotional tour for Playboy. Jessica said she's not sure what she's going to do after that. She said she's still trying to figure all of that out.
Howard talked a little bit about his Arsenio Hall show appearance and how he was thrown out of the place toward the end of the show. He said that they asked him to leave the building when he was about to go finish the show with the guy.
Howard said that he likes this new Jessica Hahn who sounds happy now. She said that she really missed Howard awhile she was in hiding and she really wanted to talk to him. She said that she'll be in town on Tuesday and they'll get together then. Howard wrapped up with her a short time later and said that he'll meet the two of them (breasts) on Tuesday. Howard let her go a short time later.
Howard and Robin talked about how the Cosby Show isn't all that funny anymore. Howard said that Cosby hasn't been that funny ever. He said that he's got one act and he just keeps doing it.
Robin read some other various news stories. She had one story about a guy who broke into the Mayor's mansion there in New York City. She read through that and said that Bob Fosse had died. She said that Lorne Green had passed away when they went away last week too.
Robin read through a few more various stories while Howard and the guys had some fun goofing around and joking about the stories.
Howard did a live commercial during the news and ended up talking about Jessica Hahn a little more during that. Howard did a recap of what had gone on during the show today after the commercial. They talked a little bit about Whoopi's appearance. Howard asked Robin what she thought of her movie for real. She said that it's going to get the same kind of reception that all of her movies get. She said that the critics are going to pick it apart but the movie was fun to watch. She said that it's a fantasy movie. Howard said that the hug Robin got from Whoopi really worked wonders.
Robin went through some more news and then Howard said that he had to go to break. He went to commercial and heard a promo for some tickets to an Eddie Murphy show the station was giving away. He asked Gary if they had any to give away. Gary said that he wasn't sure if they were going to get any or not. The guys spent a few minutes talking about Eddie's comedy act and how he had been up at Rascal's comedy club working on some new material recently.
Howard said that he had a lot of clips to play but he might have to wait until Monday to get to that stuff. Howard said that he had a clip of Marsha Warfield talking about him on The Late Show. He said that it was like doing a little war over there when he was on.
Howard had Jimmy Fink come in while he was playing the clips of Marsha Warfield. Howard said that he had asked who she was when he was on Arsenio's show. She then came out and asked who Howard Stern was. Howard played the audio and goofed on the two of them.
Howard said he heard that one of the guys there thought that Arsenio was funny on that show. He called Al in and asked him what he was thinking. Al said that he didn't think he was all that funny. Howard asked him about some of the stuff that was going on with the show like the hooting that the crowd was doing.
Howard spent a few minutes with Al and then got in some plugs for the band Pig Vomit. He said that they really deserve a record contract. Gary said that they did have some interest from Atlantic Records.
Howard asked Jimmy what he had coming up on his Cafe show. Jimmy talked about some of the stuff they had coming up for this weekend but Robin had some other stuff to talk about. She said that she was reading a memo about that Cafe show and how they wanted them to mention it so it sounded spontaneous on the air.
Howard went through some of the songs that they wanted Jimmy to play today. He was going to help him start off his show by playing one of the songs. He had to have the guys help him dig out the album so he could play the song. He played some Joe Walsh as they were ending the show. They were done around 9:35am (Master Tape Theatre time).