| Monday | Tuesday |
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| Wednesday | Thursday |
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| Friday | This Week On E! |
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Howard started off the show talking about John Lennon and how he's gotten some e-mail lately about not carrying on so much about John Lennon because no one is listening to him but old hippies anymore. Howard doesn't feel that's the case and he thinks that Lennon is just as important as he is. He asked Fred to give him some other John Lennon songs to play to show how great the guy was and what a cultural influence he was on this country. Robin said that she remembers growing up and listening to Beatles music when she was a young woman. She said they were so huge back then that everyone was listening.
Howard played a clip of another Beatles song, ''In My Life,'' and remembered having his first slow dance to that song. He doesn't understand the letter writing about the Beatles not being that important. He said Ralph told him that they kind of suck when he was over one day. Howard figures that maybe you had to grow up with them to get it.
Howard played a couple of songs that he likes. He said that one of his favorites was ''Mother'' so he explained where Lennon came up with the lyrics and played the song. He also played some ''Imagine'' and talked about what a talented guy he was. He said that the guy was a huge influence on the culture and changed the way people dress and stuff like that.
Howard also brought up the death of Richard Pryor since he passed away over the weekend. He talked about what a shame it was to see Pryor destroying his life with alcohol and drugs years ago and then seeing him slowly dying from his M.S. There were articles in the paper this morning talking about how he was known for his ''profane'' act. Howard said that's not what the guy should be known for, he was a great comedian. He and Artie talked about some of his great material and the early movies that he did that showed how great he was.
Howard said that both Lennon and Pryor were big influences on his life and when people say that they mean nothing, he takes offense to that.
Howard said there was also a hot Asian chick in the movie. Richard told Howard that the hot blonde must have been Tawny Roberts. Howard said that must be her. Richard told Howard that Tawny was trying to get up to the studio one day and they didn't let her up. Gary came in and told the guys that she was all bruised the day she showed up and they thought she was kind of messed up or something so they didn't let her up.
Howard and Richard spent some time talking about the way they pleasure themselves. Howard finished himself off and figured he'd keep the DVD ready to go again sometime after that. Richard said when he pleasures himself he tries to finish when the guy in the movie finishes. Howard thought that was kind of odd and Robin told him that the idea is to finish at the same time the girl is finishing, not when the guy finishes.
Howard brought up the season finale of ''Survivor'' and how the girls were looking really good toward the end. Then they showed them all made up on the finale show and they looked horrible. The makeup they put on the girls made them look really bad. He said that chicks look better sometimes without any makeup on and those girls shouldn't get all made up. He said that Stephanie was a good looking chick until she got all made up for that final show last night.
The guys talked about some of the football games that were played over the weekend. They also talked about the other shows that were on before Survivor. Howard then said that after watching all of that stuff he thought about pleasuring himself again before going to bed. He popped in the Sopornos movie once again and went at it again. He said that the porno stars makeup looked better than the girls on Survivor last night.
Richard Christy said he watched a porn movie over the weekend called ''Tex Ass Hole Em'' featuring Tori Lane. He said she's his new favorite now. Howard said he's got a new favorite every week. Gary loaned him a portable DVD player over the weekend and Richard said he may have accidentally soiled the player while he was doing himself. Gary told him to take care of it.
Gary admitted that he pleasured himself about 5 times over the weekend since he was away from his wife. He said he brings his laptop and a bunch of porn DVDs with him so he can pleasure himself. He said he buries the DVDs inside his DVD case so no one can really see what he's got in there. Gary doesn't use the same DVDs over and over again but Richard said he has favorite scenes that he can watch over and over again.
Sal came in and told Howard about some of the DVDs he just pulled out of his bag. He said he had movies like
Richard told Howard about how Sal went into an airplane bathroom with a magazine and spent a really long time in there. He said he was talking to the people waiting in line to get in the bathroom and had all of them cheering for him when he came out. Richard also said he pissed one guy off by farting while they were waiting in line. Gary came in and told Howard about how they took Gary the Retard out Christmas shopping and had him in a motorized cart. They tied the cart to a clothes rack and Gary ended up pulling it over. All of this is on tape too so that should end up on Howard Stern On Demand. Sal said that they took a whole Christmas tree and shoved it in the cart with Gary the Retard too. Howard had to cut the guys off because he had to get to some commercials. Richard wanted to tell more stories but they went into break.
Howard mentioned that KC Armstrong would be coming in today. He also talked about his final show that's coming up on Friday. He said he's kind of excited to have some vacation time coming up and he feels that way every year around this time. The reality of the end of the show hasn't really hit him though.
Howard talked about how he's been doing the show from the same place for 20 years now and it's going to be weird to broadcast from a new place. He said he knows that it will be better for them because they'll be able to speak the way they want to. He was also reading about how much bigger terrestrial radio is and how satellite will never really be able to catch up to them. Howard said it'll be nice if just his core audience follows him over to the new place.
Some people think that Howard is already off the air on terrestrial radio. Gary said that he had a nice dinner with the people from WYSP and they all hugged goodbye after that because they may never see each other again. Gary said that it was kind of sad to do that because they really may not see them again after working with them for years.
Howard said that maybe they should ask Tom if that's true or not. Gary said that if Tom doesn't walk in within 30 seconds, it's probably a true rumor. Tom came in a few seconds later and said that's not true. He said that they've already talked about how they're switching formats on January 3rd so everyone knows that already. Tom said that Mark Chernof is having a meeting with the jocks today at 2 o'clock today to talk to the staff about what they'll be doing over the next two weeks. Tom said that everyone pretty much knows about what's going to be going on and who will stay. Julie Slater has been asked to stay on with them to do some part time shifts.
Howard said he heard another rumor that they won't make it until the last show and that they'll be off the air after Thursday. Tom told Howard that he cold look him in the eye and say if that's the case, he hasn't heard anything about it. Gary said that doesn't mean it won't happen because the higher-ups might just yank them off the air without telling Tom. Tom said that there is an unwritten rule about how radio guys never do get a last show so who knows? Howard said he would like to know now if that's the case so he can get some sleep on Friday morning instead of getting up early.
Howard said that they have this guy Morrie coming in this morning. He made two great prank calls over the years and retired because he figured he could never top them. He's the ''I See OJ'' and ''Colin Ferguson'' calls that are still played today. Howard had to take another break after that quick discussion.
Howard had an audio clip of a guy doing a great impression of Don Imus but someone took it out of his CD player. He was able to find it on his console a few seconds later. He played the clip and the guy had the guy's voice down pretty good and sounded just like the mumbling old man.
Another caller asked Howard if he's ever been up to Vermont on vacation. Howard said that he's been up there a bunch of times. The caller said that he's pretty sure that he saw Howard jogging up there one time and Howard told him it could have been him.
Robin said that Gary Garver has been talking about coming out for the final show on Friday and he doesn't have any place to stay. Howard said that maybe he could stay with her since she has all kinds of houses all over the place. Robin said that's not true and Gary won't be staying at her place.
Howard spent a short time talking about this week's Saturday Night Live since Howard is scheduled to do it. Howard said he'll see a script this week and will decide if he's going to do it or not. He said if the script isn't all that good, he won't do the show this week but may do it in the future. That led to Howard talking about his upcoming vacation and how he will probably be doing some testing over at the new place in the next couple of weeks. He wants to get the equipment down and figure out how he's going to do things over there. They've got the new studio almost ready to go.
Howard also asked Marianne about how she thought that he was a bit flirtatious with her. He said that he really wasn't flirtatious and doesn't understand how she got that out of the interview. Marianne couldn't believe that this was turning into a nightmare. Howard said he thought the article was fine but there was no reason for her to interview him for it. Everything he said was left out of the article. Marianne told him that they took that stuff out even though she did include it. Howard said that doesn't matter because it was taken out even if she did put it in at some point.
Robin said that she thought the article was ridiculous. Howard told Marianne once again that the interview wasn't necessary. Howard let her go and talked to Benjy about it because he's good friends with Marianne. Benjy said that she's really in love with him. Howard said that's fine but the interview wasn't needed if they were going to leave all of that out. He said he enjoyed the interview with her though.
Howard mentioned that he'll be doing The Daily Show this week. He took some phone calls and one guy asked Howard if he knows how big the show is going to be on Friday. Howard doesn't think it's going to be all that big. He said he's going to symbolically walk some of his stuff a couple of blocks from the old studio toward the new one. He'll also be making a speech to the crowd and having some fun with the crowd. The caller thinks that it'll be over the top if it's anything like the Philly book signing was.
Howard had the audio of the OJ Simpson call that was made. Morrie told Howard about how it all came about when ABC News broke into a basketball game to report on the OJ Simpson chase. He scammed the producers of the show to put him on the air as if he were a reporter watching OJ from across the street from where OJ was at. Peter Jennings interviewed Morrie about what he saw as Morrie was putting on a strange accent and eventually says ''And Baba Booey To Y'all.'' Al Michaels breaks in and tells Peter Jennings that it was a ''totally farcical call'' since Jennings didn't have a clue. Jennings said that it wasn't the first time or the last time that they would have been had.
Morrie did his impression again for Howard before they played another one of his classic calls. In this classic call he called after the Colin Ferguson Long Island Railroad shootings took place. Morrie did a Jamaican accent in this call and talked about what he saw on the train that day. He said that Ferguson was yelling out ''Baba Booey, Baba Booey'' over and over again as he was shooting people. They thought he was for real and wouldn't hang up on him even though he was doing the phony accent and saying ''Baba Booey'' over and over.
Howard had Morrie do his Jamaican accent for them. He was also saying that he remembers the day that call happened and how someone on the street told him that Gary had something to do with the shooting because they had heard that prank call to WABC. Morrie said that he remembers the story getting picked up after that and how they thought the call was for real.
Howard thanked Morrie for those calls and Morrie told Howard how great it's been to be a fan of the show for the past 20 years. He said that he's now married and has two kids. He said that he would encourage his kids to do prank calls for the show in the future. Howard said he hopes to have Morrie come out of retirement some day so he can make more calls. Morrie said that he has a web site set up where you can download that great call and that's at ISeeOJ.com
Howard said that Jackie the Joke Man will be returning to the show on Thursday. Hopefully he'll show up. Howard got back to the discussion he had about his weekend and how Beth was out in Las Vegas shooting her SpikeTV show out there. He used that opportunity to pleasure himself to ''The Sopornos 4.'' He said he even had sex with Beth twice before she left but he still ran right over and pulled the porn out. He said he doesn't know why he has to do it so much, he figures he's just a horny guy.
Howard said he wanted to check out Faith Hill during a recent awards show but she came out looking like your mother. He said the next day he put in the Victoria's Secret show that aired recently and looked for some skin on that show as well. There was nothing going on with that show though and he didn't get off on that. He talked about the drama that goes on behind the scenes at the Victoria's Secret show and how he only lasted about 10 minutes before turning it off.
Robin said she watched a special about Adolf Hitler's medical history and heard that his mother would have him sleep in the bed with her until he was about 10 or 12. She also found out that the doctor who was treating Hitler's mother for breast cancer was a Jew and that may be where he got his hate for the Jews. Hitler also didn't have much of a sex life until he hooked up with his 15 year old cousin. The special also reported that he may have had some homosexual experiences while he was in the military. Robin was trying to talk about more of that show but the delay was hit because of something she brought up.
Howard got back to the story that Sal and Richard were telling about taking Gary the Retard to a Target store to go shopping. He got in a motorized cart and drove around the store. Sal and Richard were throwing stuff in the cart like a giant Christmas tree. Gary was driving all over the place and running into stuff. Howard said he saw the tape and he'll have it put on Howard Stern On Demand so people can see it. Howard said that the store security guards let them get away with a lot of stuff there. Sal and Richard said that those guys were big fans, that's why they let them get away with that stuff.
Richard said that they took Gary golfing and replaced the ball with an egg so the egg exploded when he hit it. Richard said that he popped a balloon behind Gary at one point as he was swinging the club and he threw the club. The guys have been bringing Gary on a lot of gigs these days. Sal said that he offers Gary ''one one hundred dollar bill'' or ''twenty one dollar bills'' and Gary always takes the twenty bills. Sal said that Craig Gass is actually the one who is taking care of paying Gary so he's not even sure what he's making.
Fred said that he's feeling a little bit of sadness but also some anger. Fred, who hardly ever speaks, had a lot to say about how other radio guys are claiming the be the renegades of terrestrial radio but Howard is the one who was the real one and he doesn't like how they're almost being chased out of the industry. No one is backing Howard in his fight against the FCC and now they have to move to a new medium to speak freely. Fred talked about all of the years of great things that have gone on and how big things got. Now they have to start over again.
Fred was also saying that it's weird how someone is coming in to take over for Howard like they're going to be as big as he was. Howard said they do have to have someone take over for him and that's just the way things go. Robin said that she was interested that Fred actually had feelings on that stuff.
Gary had come in as well and said that he feels the same way as Fred. He also has sadness and anger in him. He said that it all started when Mel (Karmazin) left the company. He said a lot of people didn't understand how much the show meant to the company and didn't treat them all that well. He is excited about their move to the new place because he believes that Howard will make the medium what it should be and will go down in history as a great entertainer.
Howard said his bitterness is gone and he's really excited about creating something new over at the new place and with his new Howard Stern On Demand show. He has limitless possibilities right now and he'll be able to speak the way he wants to speak and get back to doing things the way he used to. He said that ''the line'' has gotten worse and worse over the years and he's gotten to the point where he has to censor himself to speak on the air.
Robin made an analogy about Howard losing his life essence as E.T. did in ''E.T. The Extraterrestrial'' when he was withering away. Now that Howard has this new job lined up and he's looking forward to it, he's gotten his life essence back.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that his wife bought him a SIRIUS radio but had a hard time finding one because all of the stores were sold out. He thinks that they will have plenty of audience when they move to the new place.
Sal said that he has studied some of Howard's doodles and stuff but he doesn't take them home. Sal said he does look at some of the stuff that Howard leaves in the studio when he cleans it up. He said he would never risk getting fired by taking that stuff home. The biggest thing he has is a Private Parts poster with Howard's autograph hanging next to his kids photos in his basement.
A listener brought up the SIRIUS thing again so Howard talked about how great it is that there is a place for him to go now.
Robin was telling Howard that she had no idea that Howard was into doodling noses like Sal said he was. Gary said that he's seen some doodles of him when he's gone to clean up Howard's console. Sal told him that it's actually doodles of King Kong which led to Gary goofing on Sal as well because he's not far off from the way he looks.
Howard said that all of those bleeps make him realize that it's time for him to move on. That stuff was actually on the air a short time ago and now they can't play it. He said he was watching Survivor recently and heard one of the guys calling some people ''scumbags.'' That got him thinking about his history with the word and how he's had trouble with it in the past. He argued with the general manager of a station he was on years ago. They stopped him for a few weeks until finally letting him use it. Then he went to WNBC and to WXRK. At WXRK they didn't want him using the word on the air but he didn't want to agree to that. They also didn't want him to say ''douche bag'' and limited him to saying it a certain number of times per show. Howard said that when he saw the word on network TV, in prime time, it shows him that it really means nothing and the battles he had to go through to get it on the air were nonsense.
Howard said that shows like Oprah and ''The View'' can use all kinds of words that he can't even use on the air. He said that he can't sit and watch as ''The View'' and ''Survivor'' are edgier than his show is. He thanked JD for sharing his favorite moment and then went to break.
Comedian Colin Quinn dropped by to talk to Howard about how great the show is and how he's been a fan because of the way Howard has done interviews over the years. Colin told Howard that he's broke so Artie asked him if that's because of his divorce. That got the guys talking about Colin's divorce.
Colin got married and ended up getting separated about a week later. Howard said it's a great story and talked about how Colin got caught chatting with a chick who he had been hooking up with. His wife saw the chats and ended up leaving him. Colin said he was going to kill himself because he was just coming in to talk about how great the show was. He said that he wasn't just married for a week either, it was a few weeks... or a month.
Ralph was in so he asked Colin why he got married if he was still getting laid. Colin yelled at him and asked him if he was the moral majority or something all of a sudden. Colin said that he was blaming Artie for all of this because he's the one who brought it up. Howard spent a few minutes talking to Colin about the divorce because it shows just how out of control some people can be.
Colin claims that the divorce did tear him up and it's not like he didn't care about it. Howard told Colin about the revelation show that they wanted to do for the last show. He told Colin that they'll be saving that stuff for the new show over at Eh, Ehh, Ehh.
Howard played a clip from the show where Ralph took a lie detector test to find out if he was gay. Ed Torian the lie detector guy asked Ralph a bunch of questions about being gay while Ralph laughed his ass off. Howard couldn't believe it when Ed told him that Ralph was deceptive about his answers. Ralph said that he's not good at taking tests. That was Ralph's shining moment on the show according to Howard.
In another great Ralph moment, he had to go down to the Lincoln tunnel dressed as a transvestite after losing a bet on the show. Howard played the clip where you hear Ralph talking about how hot he thought he looked compared to the other women out there. He also had someone pull up next to him and then take off by peeling out. The cops stopped by and told him to get out of there as well. Ralph said that he thought that the cops were in on the joke so he was kind of joking around but they were serious. They told him to get out of there or else he'd get arrested.
Ralph talked about how he's been listening to the show for many years, from the beginning, and it is kind of sad that it's ending. He said it's kind of weird that he won't be able to just turn on any radio and pick up his show. Howard said that hopefully that will change when people get their satellite radios.
Howard took a call from a woman who claims to have dated Colin back in the 1980s. Colin didn't think that was true because he didn't know a black woman by the name of Stephanie. She knew where he worked and claims that he did go out with her. The delay was hit a couple of times during her call so we missed out on some of the conversation. She eventually hung up and Colin was still denying that he ever went out with a black hooker who met him at the comedy club he was working at.
Another woman called in and told Howard that she was able to come out of the closet as a lesbian because of Howard's show. She dragged out the story so Howard had to hang up on her.
Irish John called in and asked Howard to play another classic bit where Ralph and Stuttering John almost got into a fight. Howard said that they have played that one quite a bit before so they won't be playing it again today. Howard was ready to take another break because it was ten past nine. The guys couldn't believe that their last Monday at K-Rock was almost over already.
The guys spent a short time talking about the final show and the rumors that they may not even be there for that if Infinity decides to fire Howard on Thursday. While they were talking about that possibility, the delay was hit a few times... Hmmmm... makes you wonder, doesn't it?
Howard said that he's going to buy another apartment just so he can get away from Ralph. He said that Ralph tends to get way too comfortable when he goes someplace and that's what happened at his apartment. Ralph has all day to do whatever he wants so he doesn't want him staying there at his apartment to eat, read or do anything else. At one point Ralph was even taking showers there at his apartment. He asked him to sit there and not annoy him while Robin did her news.
Fred played a couple of clips off of Jeff's new album where he covers a bunch of songs like ''Rhinestone Cowboy,'' ''Margaritaville'' and ''New York, New York.'' Howard told Jeff he'd see him on Friday for that final show.
Robin finished up her news report and Howard ended the show around 10:15am.
Howard started off the show talking about how he and Gary were talking about the merit of Scott the Engineer's Christmas gift to him. He said that he got a DVD set from him but doesn't think that he'll ever watch it. He and Gary were talking about DVD sets and how they don't know who watches them. Scott gave Howard a Dick Cavet set that features rarities like a John Lennon interview and some rock performances. Artie said he once gave Howard a Honeymooners set and it was given right to Scott DePace. He said the one year he tried to give him something else like a gift certificate to Barney's, Howard tells him it wasn't thoughtful enough.
Howard said that he gave something very nice to Robin and Gary. Artie hasn't gotten his gift yet so he can't comment but both Robin and Gary liked theirs very much. They didn't say exactly what they were though. Howard told Scott that he never watches DVDs so that box set wasn't all that great of a gift.
Howard mentioned that he has a box set of Alias the TV show and he hasn't watched any of it. Gary said he has one season of the show ''24'' and he hasn't watched any of that either. He said that Vinnie Favale was trying to talk him into buying a media server so he can put all of his DVDs and music on one system so he can watch it all around his house. That led to Howard talking about how Vinnie has the best job in the world and once burned him a CD filled with every version of ''Goodnight Irene'' on once CD but he never bothered to listen to it, it ended up in the garbage.
Gary told Howard about Vinnie's media server idea and how much time it must take to put something like that together. He said that Vinnie has also bragged about how he has gotten rid of all of his jewel cases because he's ripped everything to his media server. He said that Vinnie has a ton of spare time over at CBS where he's the Vice President of Late Night Programming, East Coast. Gary said he thinks that Vinnie has a lot of time from about noon until 5:30 in the evening. He works with David Letterman and is probably the guy who is the buffer between Letterman and the suits at CBS.
Artie said he knows a lot of people who have one night where they watch a ton of shows. Howard said his father likes to watch Seinfeld on TV but he would never put in a DVD to watch the episodes. The guys talked about the box set of ''Sex and the City'' and how they can't imagine anyone sitting down to watch it. Howard said the show was good but he would never sit down, pop in a DVD and watch it.
The caller asked Howard what date he started there at K-Rock. Artie thought it was the 17th or 18th of November, 1985. Tom came in and told the guy that it was actually the 18th. JD came in and told Howard that the guys over at The Daily Show canceled the show yesterday because one of their staff members committed suicide over the weekend. Howard wondered if they would cancel today's show too so he doesn't have to go tape that. Howard figures that if someone on their staff did that, they would keep the show going.
Howard brought up how the station has been playing a David Lee Roth song right before the show every morning there in New York. He said that's very ''gay'' and wondered who made that dopey decision. Roth is taking over for Howard in a few markets starting in January. Artie was saying that the station was probably just trying to show people what David Lee Roth does really well before he starts his radio show in January.
Someone was breathing into one of the microphones and whistling with their nose so Howard asked Artie if it was him. Artie didn't think it was and thought it was Gary. Gary said it wasn't him because he looked over and heard it coming from someone else. Howard had some fun with Artie for a minute and then got back to the teenage sluts movie he watched. He said the first chick wasn't hot but the second chick was ''super frickin' hot.'' He said she didn't have boobs but she had a great ass. The guy in that part of the movie was another disturbing looking guy who was supposed to look 18 but he wasn't anywhere close to that age.
Howard said he was able to go to sleep after watching the porno but he ended up waking up at 9:30 at night, unable to sleep. He took an Ambien to try and get back to sleep so he was watching TV to pass the time. He switched from channel to channel watching various shows. Artie told Howard there's a new Ambien out that's supposed to put you to sleep immediately and then there's a time release part of the pill that keeps you sleeping.
Howard talked about how he wanted to call off the show today because of his illness. Artie told him he should have done it because this is the time he should be calling in sick. Gary told him to call in sick the rest of the week and call off the final show so they can just move on.
The guys talked about how the fat suit experiments they've been doing on TV shows lately and how ridiculous people look when they dress them up like that. The guys said that they make them up to look like a Macy's day parade float and it's no wonder that people stare at them.
Yucko the Clown called in and told Howard he saw Beth out in Vegas while he's been there. He plans on coming back to the New York area on Friday so he can be part of the final show. Howard spent a minute talking to Yucko before letting him go. He spent a couple of minutes talking about how Beth called him yesterday after his computer had crashed and took it out on her a little bit. He was also complaining about being sick as if it was her fault.
Sal came in and asked Howard if he had the runs yesterday because he spent about 15 minutes in the bathroom. Howard said that Sal is such a fag and he should really stop timing him when he's in the bathroom. Howard claims that he just went in and peed, that was it. He told Sal to get out of there because he's a sick man. He said that was really creepy that Sal timed him in the bathroom.
Howard and Gary talked about some gifts that the guys were thinking about getting for Howard. Gary said that Richard was thinking about getting him a DVD set of ''Family Guy'' but Howard isn't a fan. Then there were a couple of other things like gift certificates to restaurants or bottles of wine. Howard doesn't want either. He said that he gives those bottles of wine away to his assistant whenever someone sends him some. Artie said that he went over to Howard's apartment one time and saw that Howard has tons of bottles in his apartment.
Howard said he's stopped drinking Vodka now too and he'll only drink a little wine if he goes out to a restaurant. He said the last time he drank Vodka, he got really wasted and ended up having a headache so he's given up on it. Richard asked Howard if he wanted some Munsters paraphernalia. That wasn't a good idea so Howard told him to just get him a nice picture frame. Then he thought about it and said he doesn't wan that because it's a taste thing and Richard's taste might not be what he wants. Richard was thinking about giving him an 8x10 photo of his graduation photo so he can hang it in his apartment.
Howard told Robin to tell everyone what they got her. She said that it was an evening purse from Judith Lieber and it's great. She said she loves it. Howard and Beth went out and found it together. Gary asked Robin to compare that gift to what Mr. X gave to her. Howard wondered why Gary would compare something like that because Mr. X doesn't make the same kind of money he does. He told Gary that he's a weird dude. Mr. X does help out with the shopping because he will give a list of things that Robin would like. Gary said he got Robin a gift certificate for a massage place that she likes to go to. He went to pick up the gift one day and the place wasn't what he expected, it was much smaller and not as fancy as he thought it would be. Artie said he thought about getting Robin a basketball and Howard a money counting machine.
Robin said that there were reports that said that Howard was influenced by Richard Pryor but Howard said that he really wasn't. He said that Pryor was a great comedian but that's not who he was influenced by.
Howard invited AJ down to the final show but AJ is out shooting a movie so he can't make it. He's going to be in the next Rocky movie and thinks that this one will be as good as the first one. He said he's not fighting Rocky in the movie but he will be appearing in it. Howard let AJ go after that.
Howard took a call from The Sim who said that he's all over Yahoo this week. Howard said that Yahoo is going to be following him around on Friday and they'll have that stuff for people to check out over there. They wanted to put a GPS tracking device on him to track his progress to the new place. There will be a lot happening that day and there will be a lot of press coverage. Howard had to go to another break after that.
He then took a call from this guy Chachi from up at WBCN in Boston. Chachi has been with WBCN for 24 years now and works as their Marketing Promotion Director. Chachi spent a minute talking about how great Howard has been with WBCN and how much people up there love him. Howard said that it was very nice of Chachi telling him that the best years at WBCN were while he was working there. Howard let him go a short time later. Gary said that Chachi is the most devoted fan of the show and he's a great guy. Artie said that they've been really supportive of him when he's gone up there.
Howard explained how Mel came to him after he was fired from WNBC and hired him. He had 2 and a half years left on his NBC contract at the time so he was afraid that no one was going to touch him. His agent called and said that Mel Karmazin wanted to hire him. He knew who Mel was and told his agent he wanted to sign on with him. His agent told him to calm down and not rush into it but Howard wanted to get back on the air.
At the time Mel told Howard that they would have no problem selling the show and knew that they'd be able to sell it more than he could imagine. NBC was making Howard think that he'd never be hired again in the business but Mel proved them wrong.
Mel told Howard that the easiest decision he's ever made was hiring Howard Stern. He talked about the amazing ratings that Howard was getting on an AM station in the afternoons on WNBC. He said as soon as he heard that NBC had fired Howard, he called his agent and said that it was a done deal, he wanted Howard that bad.
Howard said that he made the right decision going with Mel too. Now WNBC is out of the radio business completely. Howard and Mel talked about those days and how great it was that they got together. Without Mel, it's possible that no one in New York would have ever touched him. Howard said that there were some bad times over the past 20 years when the FCC was on his ass. He said that Mel offered to back him 100 percent. You don't get that from every radio station owner.
Mel talked about how the FCC kind of forced them into making a voluntary payment to them to get out of the fines that they had up against them. Mel said that he would have gone to court to fight the fines but the FCC held up a license so he could buy other radio stations and he had to cave into them.
Mel told Howard that one of the things that was very controversial at the time was when Howard had a fan come in and play a piano with his genitals. He said they got fined over that but there was no indecency there as far as he was concerned. He said that it actually cost them millions of dollars to defend that one $6,000 fine. Mel and Howard think that they could have won in court if they had been able to take it there. The FCC held them for ransom and wouldn't allow them to take the case to court.
Howard said that he now realizes that shows like Oprah Winfrey are edgier shows than his is these days. She can talk about sex stuff that he's not allowed to talk about now. That's one reason he's glad to be moving to satellite. Bong Hit Eric called in and said that it was refreshing to hear Mel talking about Howard the way he is. That's the way Infinity should be talking to him. Mel left Infinity a year and a half ago and is now the CEO of SIRIUS Satellite Radio.
Mel talked about how amazing it was when Howard syndicated into Los Angeles and beat the number one show, Mark and Brian, shortly after he started there. He wasn't even live, he was on tape delay and still beat them. Mel talked about some of the other stations that Howard went on around the country and turned to number one stations. That had never been done in radio before Howard came along.
Howard thanked Mel for all of those great years and thanked him for coming in this morning. He said that it's been a lot of fun and he was going to take a break so he could give Mel a hug... and put his tongue in his mouth. Mel said that this was a great pre-game show for the real game that starts in January. They went to break a short time later.
Howard moved on and said he found something weird in light of what Mel was saying earlier about the FCC not allowing him to buy radio stations while they had outstanding fines. He read an article about the FCC holding back Time Warner cable from buying another company until they agree to cut back on indecent broadcasts on PAY TV services. Howard believes that this is a form of racketeering on the FCC's part.
A caller asked Howard about the possibility of the transit strike he mentioned a few minutes before. Howard said he believes that the transit strike will be worked out by Thursday night. Artie said that if they do call off the big gathering, he'll just go bar hopping with some people who show up. Howard said that his family is showing up to make speeches on Friday so he's looking forward to that.
Another caller tried to talk about SIRIUS but Tom hit the button on him so we missed out on almost everything he said about it. The caller said he was looking forward to hearing Howard cursing once he moves to the new place. Artie said that he'll probably curse as soon as they get on the air but Howard was thinking about holding off for a few days, just to tease the audience.
Artie said that he will be making a speech on Friday and will be talking about what the show means to him. Fred said he's been working on a speech as well but he's thrown away three of them already. Robin said she will have something to say but won't have a script written up for it. She also said she won't be flashing everyone as Howard wanted.
Gary told Howard that the show is only a half hour show and he may only have to do 15 minutes at the most. Artie said it will probably be even less than that. Howard said he did Jon Stewart's first talk show on MTV years ago and he likes the guy. He's not looking forward to the interview though because he's sick today.
The guys talked about some other classic interviews that Howard has done over the years. That led to Howard talking about one show where Howard dressed up in black face. He said he recently thought about doing a sequel to Private Parts where they have him getting ready to do that show. He said the opening scene would have to open up with that because it was so scary for him as he was preparing to do it. Gary said that getting in black face 20-some years ago was crazy. Even today that kind of thing wouldn't happen. Howard thought that opening that up in a sequel to Private Parts would be great.
He'd also like to get into some of the other things he's done for his TV show career. He said there was one season of the WWOR (Channel 9) show where they were beating Saturday Night Live in the ratings. They talked about some of the guests they had on the WWOR show and the goofy stuff they would do back then. Howard talked about an interview he did with Sabrina LaBouf from the Cosby Show where he was dressed as a black man who looked white. Gary said that there was a great show they did with Cheech and Chong but WWOR wouldn't allow them to air it around Christmas because it was wrong on so many levels. Howard said it took him forever to get it on the air but they eventually put it on after editing it down a lot.
Gary remembered another moment on the show where they had to black out the whole screen so no one could see what was going on with the dominatrix they had on.
Captain Janks called in and told Howard he wrote a couple of speeches for the final show and ended up crying as he was writing them. He also told Howard that he loved the WWOR show where Kenneth Keith Kallenbach threw up on Howard. That reminded Gary about the show Ken did where he lit fireworks off in his pants and ended up getting kicked out of the bowling alley they were shooting in.
Howard moved on to play some of the show members favorite moments. This was one of Benjy's best moments on the show. Anna Nicole Smith was in for a visit and she was at her fattest. Benjy was able to come on to her in a way that she agreed to go into the bathroom with him to make out with him. Howard played the clip where you could hear Benjy and Anna Nicole in the bathroom whispering to one another. Anna told Benjy that she was on her period because the whole idea was for Benjy to give her oral. Benjy was telling Anna that he was a fan of hers from way back in 1990. You can hear the toilet running and KC banging on the door trying to get a microphone in there. Luckily there was a microphone that caught all of their discussions.
Howard said that Benjy must have been pretty gross because Anna would only lightly kiss him instead of really make out and let him perform oral on her. When they came out of the bathroom Anna told Howard that nothing happened.
Benjy told Howard that when he started on the show, in 1998, he was homeless, and now he's come a long way. Howard cut him off and said he had a lot to get to. Benjy thinks that his story is a big success story and that's what he wanted to talk about. Benjy said he was living at the studio and with a friend way back then and now he's been able to move on and get his own place. Howard cut him off again and told him to sit down. Robin told him to save that story for Friday's show instead.
Fred said that Benjy has gained about 40 pounds in the past few weeks and he's taking up more space than usual. Artie has to sit right next to him but wouldn't say anything bad since he's no picnic to sit next to either. When they move to the new place, they'll all have room to spread out so Benjy can gain even more weight if he wants.
Howard took a call from a woman who wanted to know why Benjy was saying that he's willing to take a risk on performing oral on a woman if she's hot and it's ''worth it.'' Benjy said its not worth getting AIDS over but he would be more willing to take the risk if the reward is worth it.
Another caller brought up Howard's Howard Stern On Demand show that's available now on digital cable. The caller said he liked the Gary apology tape that they're running on there now and some of the other stuff that they've got available this month.
Howard took a call from a woman who said that her husband is upset that she wants to see Howard on Friday and doesn't want her to give up the Dave Matthtews concert tickets she has. Howard told her to just do what she wants and get a separate life from her husband.
There was a lot going on during that show because a fan had called in to let Howard know that Fred had gotten into the fight. Fred got upset with Howard for exploiting the whole thing. Then Fred's wife Alison called in and got upset, then Fred quit the show and went off on everyone. He told Howard that he had gone over the line and quit the show because of what was going on. Robin had tried to convince Fred to stay on because they had been so loyal to him. Fred said that he was the loyal one and he might be better off leaving.
The whole fight was pretty bad and Howard apologized to Fred after listening to the tape. Fred said that things are all better now and he and his wife have a beautiful daughter together. He also pointed out that the person he went to dinner with that night (Jackie) is no longer married. Fred said that he had actually thrown a glass at the wall at The Rainbow Room and that's not like him. He said he was a little bit lit that night.
Gary said that Fred had quit another time when they were working on the movie but Fred told him that it was the same day.
Howard took a call from a woman who said that she was an intern back in 1998 and she's moved on to be a news producer for a TV station in South Carolina. She told Howard that she was the one who asked Jamie Lee Curtis if she was born with both male and female genitals. She thanked Howard for what he did for her and got off the line a short time later.
Senator Al was talking about SIRIUS a little bit so the delay button was hit at least once since Infinity is so afraid of a little promotion. Howard let Senator Al go a short time later. He said that Al has always been a supporter of his show and he really appreciates that.
Howard said that he did get a little emotional earlier in the morning when Mel stopped by. He's thinking that he could get very emotional on Friday since it's his last show there at WXRK. He said that on Friday he will be begging Tom to do some revelations since Tom didn't want them to do it. Howard said he's hoping that Tom will cave in and let him do it. If not, he will save it for the new place which is in outer space somewhere. He wanted to reveal just one of them at the least but Tom apparently doesn't want to allow that. Howard had to go to break a short time after that.
Howard said that Artie looked odd when he came back from the break and it was because he had just revealed this to Will. Artie said he couldn't even look Will in the eye as he was revealing the story to him. Will said he doesn't like to look anyone in the eye when he hears the stories.
Howard said that he wanted to reveal all of the stuff on the final show on Friday but Tom thinks that it's too much of cliffhanger and they don't want him doing it on the last show... So Howard has to save it for the first day at the new place.
Artie's old revelation was up for grabs so Howard had Artie tell the story. Artie said that when he was 18, he and a friend stole a car. Howard stopped him right there and told him it wasn't a good enough story so he's glad it didn't make it to the revelation show. Artie said they stole the car to make some money to pay off a bookie. He said they actually ended up bringing the car back to the guy who they stole it from because they thought he might be ''connected.'' Artie said they took it from outside of an all night poker game.
Artie said they knew this place and knew that this security guard would fall asleep and the keys would be inside of it. The car was something like a 1978 Impala that was done up all nice. He said they took the car, drove it around the block and picked up a friend. The friend told them that the guy was probably connected so they decided to bring it back. As they were bringing it back, they drove past the guy who was guarding the cars and he was filling out a police report. They pulled the car over a short way away and ran off. Artie said that he couldn't find his wallet later on and thought that he had left it in the car. He didn't leave it in the car though.
Howard and the guys thought it was pretty weird that Artie had 7 Gs in gambling debts at the age of 18. Artie said he had to do roofing for a whole summer to make up for that. He said he had to stop gambling for a while but that was only because no one would take his bets.
Will told Howard that Artie's new revelation for the big revelation show is good. Gary told Howard that he once stole a car as well. He took it for a joy ride when he was about 16 but didn't keep the car, he returned it. Howard said that he's going to ask Tom on Friday if they can do at least one revelation. Artie said that he hasn't even told his therapist about this revelation that Will now knows about.
Artie said that his revelation may be a bad idea and he may lose sleep over the whole thing. He said that it's the kind of story that will make people look at him differently. Robin said hers is the same type of story so she's in it with him.
Mariann from Brooklyn called in and rambled on and on for a short time about how she can't believe that Tom won't let them do the revelation show. Howard had to cut her off and let her go since her voice was going right through him.
Howard played more of Artie's clip from that day and then took a call from Dan the Farter. Dan said that he's been practicing for the final show. Howard wanted to have him perform on stage with The Losers but Gary said they have some time restrictions and they may not be able to make that happen. Gary was also saying that they may not have time for any songs to be played that morning. He was being kind of cryptic about what he was saying. It sounds like they may not have the ability to let Staind perform The Beetlejuice Song like they wanted to. Howard had to go to break a short time later.
A few people called in during the news. Ralph called in and complained about the way he was treated yesterday when he was on because Howard was just complaining about him. Howard took a call from Wendy the Retard who was working on a speech for the final show on Friday. Howard let her read some of it but he cut her off telling her that she was using his speech and she'd have to write something new. Wendy and her mother will be driving up to New York starting tomorrow around six in the morning.
Robin wrapped up her news and Howard ended the show at around 10:15am.
Howard said that he almost called in sick this morning. He called and let Gary know that he was going to let him take over for the morning but he panicked and said he couldn't do it... So he came in. Gary came in and said that he told Howard that he could do it but Howard didn't hear it that way. He said that he was going to do it by playing some tapes from ''the wall'' of carts they have but he didn't pre-listen to them. That might cause some problems so when Howard heard that he said he'd come in. Howard heard something in Gary's voice that made him think he couldn't do it, so now he's there.
Gary admitted that he did tell Howard that if it wasn't the last three days, he would have told him to stay home in bed. Howard really wanted to have him sit in for him but it sure sounded like he couldn't handle it. Gary tried to convince Howard that the stuff on the wall had to be listened to before they can play it on the air. Howard said he had an idea for what Gary could do and he just didn't come through for him. The two of them were arguing but Howard said he didn't have the strength to fight with him. He told Gary that he won and asked him to leave the studio.
Robin tried to get Gary to stop fighting and ended up getting into a battle with him herself. While all of that was going on Fred was playing a new Baba Booey song parody. Howard said that Gary was almost asking him to come in this morning when he said he wasn't sure how things would work.
Artie said that they could have done a type of Super Fan Round Table show themselves. He would have had stuff to talk about with the guys and things would have gone fine. Howard said he might last an hour and then go home. Robin told Howard to let Gary take over now but Howard said he'll wait until 7 and then leave.
Fred tried to help Howard out by playing a musical moment from the show that someone requested recently. He got about 10 seconds into the song, Grand Funk Railroad's ''I'm Your Captain,'' and Howard said ''Oh, who cares'' and moved on.
Gary came in and said that Will left Jessica Hahn two messages last week asking her to come down so he doesn't know why she's so upset. He also talked about the way the news team was laughing at Jessica's crying after listening to the interview that Shuli did with her. Howard said that he's very glad that he never slept with Jessica. Gary said he was afraid that's what the big revelation was going to be on the news program last night.
Howard said that they were going to kill the story over there so he had to let Liz know that it was okay to run that story. Scott Greenstein was trying to protect him but that's not what the news team is there for. Howard has told the news team that they can run with any story they want to.
Artie said that if Howard doesn't announce something soon, it might turn into a nightmare because he has a feeling that a lot of people are coming out for it. Robin told Howard that people will stand outside in anything on New Year's Eve so maybe they'll be fine on Friday.
A listener called in and told Howard that he's coming out from Kansas City for the big show on Friday. Double A called in and told Howard that he's got a speech ready for that day. Howard didn't know he was doing one so Gary came in and said that Double A won't be making a speech. He said they're very limited on time. Double A got a little upset and asked Gary to make room for him. Gary had a list of people who will be ahead of him on the list and there's just not enough time to let him go.
Howard wanted to hear Double A's speech so Double A went ahead and read it. Fred played some snoring sounds as it was going on and that seemed to piss Double A off. He said he put 22 years of listening in for this and he really wants to make a 30 second speech. Double A said the speech was ''heart filled'' and he really wanted that time up on stage. Gary asked Artie to give up his time on stage for Double A so Artie said he had no problem with that. He'll be sitting on the side drinking anyway. Howard had hung up on Double A by that point.
A listener called in and thanked Howard for the years of shows they've given him and that he can't wait for the new place. That led to Robin talking about hearing a news report about how big satellite radio might become now that there's something worth listening to. The guys spent a minute on that before Howard went to break.
Howard said that their Engineer Steve was going to come in and say goodbye to them. Steve is the guy who sounds kind of like Woody Allen and has played the part of Wood Yi for many years. Steve hates being on the air but did come in to talk about working with them for years. He told Howard that Billy West was the one who actually picked up on his voice and had him play the part of Wood Yi. Howard wanted to take credit for that but Steve was giving that to Billy West.
Howard thanked Steve for the many great bits that he's done for them. He played a clip of the song ''Sushi Smell'' to the tune of Jingle Bells which Steve performed as Wood Yi. Howard also remembered a prank call that Steve made to a transmission shop so he played that for everyone. In the call Steve was asking the transmission shop guy a bunch of gay questions which pissed off the shop owner. Howard said that was a classic bit from Steve and there were many others.
Howard said he once had an Asian woman sing Happy Birthday to Steve as Wood Yi. He played that and talked about the way Steve would play the part of Wood Yi whenever they'd have an Asian guest on the show and he would ask them many inappropriate questions. He didn't have any examples of that to play though.
Howard thanked Steve for working with them and Steve told Howard it's been a great 20 years working with him. He also said that he would like to work with Howard again at the new place but Howard doesn't think Infinity will let that happen. Robin said they should let Steve do some voice work over there because it would be on his own time.
Steve wished Howard a lot of success, health and happiness. Howard said that Steve is one of the stars of the upcoming ''Supertwink'' movie and plays the part of Lord Rectum. Steve said that it was a surprising role for him and he didn't expect it to be the type of film it turned out to be. The guys spent a few minutes talking about the part he plays and how he does have a couple of lines in the movie. Steve said that this was his first time acting on camera so he was a little nervous.
Howard asked Artie where his scene was in the Supertwink movie. Artie told Howard he comes in about halfway in and he plays the part of a plumber who has to remove a gerbil from Elephant Boy's ass. Howard said that maybe Steve couple appear at Lord Rectum again in future movies. He shouldn't have any trouble with the company letting him do that.
Howard said that he was watching his Howard Stern On Demand show last night and actually pleasured himself to the Fantastic Four Penthouse Pets show that they have up there. He said it was kind of tough to do because he kept seeing himself on screen in between the hot, naked chicks. The Supertwink movie will be airing on Howard Stern On Demand starting January 1st.
Howard spent a little more time talking to Steve about the work he's done on the show. Artie also said that Steve is one of his favorite characters on the show when he does his Wood Yi character. Steve said he never thought he would be that much a part of the show. He also said that when people ask him what Howard is like, he tells them that he likes Howard, he's very nice to him and that he's a mench. Howard said that he would say the same thing about Steve and thanked him again for working with them. He let Steve go and said that he really loves that guy.
Howard doesn't know why the guys didn't give him some audio of Wood Yi talking to some Asian women. Richard said they did have a clip on the CD Howard had in the player. It was a produced clip where they say goodbye to Wood Yi by playing some of his classic lines that he said to the Asian women. Robin said that makes her sad. Howard had to go to break after that.
Howard mentioned that High Pitch Eric managed to get in the audience of The Daily Show. No one is sure how Eric gets into all of these events. Eric was on the phone and said that Irish John had tickets to the show, so that's how he got in. Eric thought that Howard dancing with Jon at the start of his interview was really funny. He also thought the interview was very good after the dancing.
Eric said that he's preparing his speech for Friday but no one wanted to hear it ahead of time. Robin said that she heard that Eric's family was very upset with him over the Craptacular show he did on Howard 100 a few weeks back. Eric said that his family confronted him on Thanksgiving about that show. His sister hates that he's on the show at all and all of her friends tell her about it when he's on. Then he has to hear about it from them.
The delay was hit around this time when Howard and the guys were talking about Eric's Craptacular. Robin also said she heard that Eric is supposed to stop doing the show or he's going to get cut off from his family. Eric says that he doesn't care but Howard reminded him that if he gets cut off, he won't be getting money from his family. Eric said he doesn't care again but he seems to forget that he has no way of making money without his family helping him out.
Eric was kind of hard to understand this morning, it may have been his phone. Eric kept saying that he gets ''the third degree burn'' from his family whenever he's on the show. Howard had to correct him and told him it's just ''the third degree'' without the burn when his family confronts him. Howard let him go and went to another commercial break.
Howard took a call from The Sim who was making sure that the final show wasn't going to be canceled because there area lot of people coming out. Howard said that it's not canceled, it's still on.
Howard said that Jackie the Joke Man will be coming in tomorrow to say goodbye. KC will be in later today and Howard said that even Billy West sent them a tape that he'll play later in the show.
Howard heard that Gary's handler has caught Gary pleasuring himself in his hotel room on a couple of occasions. Gary said that wasn't true but that's what Howard heard. Howard asked the guys to bring in this guy Jason who handles Gary. Jason came in and said that it's his responsibility to keep track of Gary and get him to his gigs. He told Howard about what he's seen with Gary and how he always cranks up everything he listens to at full blast. Jason said he walked into Gary's apartment and Gary had Skinimax on at full blast so it made him kind of self conscious.
Howard gave Gary a couple of plugs for the appearances he has coming up with the Killers of Comedy over the next few weeks. You can get more information on those gigs at revboblevy.net.
Howard moved on to play some of Gary the Retard's classic bits. He said that the best phony phone call they've made is the one where they had the ''retarded flu'' call Gary. Gary thought that he could get the flu over the phone so Richard Christy played the part of ''the flu'' and tried to infect Gary. Sal was also on the phone and told Gary to disguise his voice and maybe the flu wouldn't know who he was. Sal later told Gary to say ''Shoo Shoo, Retarded Flu'' to get rid of him. Gary did that and killed off the flu.
Howard told Gary that he was very brave in that call but Gary said that the Flu still follows him around to the comedy shows he does. Howard told him he thinks he has the flu on the phone and picked up Sal and Richard. Richard tried to infect him again so Gary was doing his ''Shoo Shoo Retarded Flu'' but it wasn't working. Howard asked The Flu to leave Gary alone at the comedy shows but The Flu said that Craig Gass pays him to follow Gary around. Gary coughed a couple of times so The Flu told him that he got him. Gary told The Flu that he hates him and that he has to stop calling him.
Howard played another classic Gary the Retard clip where they called him using clips of Heidi Cortez trying to get him off. Gary asked her to call him back so he could move to his bedroom. Howard said he'll never understand that call because Gary wanted to move to his bedroom. Gary said he has too many people who knock on his door so he wanted to move into his bedroom.
Howard played another prank call that Gary made to an operator asking her for the phone number for the company 1-800-FLOWERS. Gary didn't know that the name of the company is also the phone number. The operator tried to explain it to him but Gary hung up on her.
There was another call where Gary called a chicken restaurant and tried to explain that he got some bad chicken. The employees kept putting him on hold with some awful music playing while he was on hold. Gary would yell at them to turn the music off even though they couldn't hear him. Howard told Gary that he does great with those calls.
The guys brought in another call that Gary was part of with Daniel Carver and Wendy the Retard. The three of them discussed the death of Rosa Parks. Daniel spewed his usual racist stuff and Gary ended up agreeing with what he was saying. Wendy the Retard was getting into some racist stuff with Daniel as well but not as much as Gary was. Howard doesn't believe that Gary is really a racist. Gary said that he doesn't like it when people call Robin the N-word but Robin told him that he was using the word himself. Gary said he only uses it while on the phone and only for ''other people out there'' and not her. Howard wrapped up with Gary and brought in his next guests.
Les told Howard that he is a fan of the show and even bought his own SIRIUS radio. He actually said SIRIUS
and it made it out on the air. Joel said that he also got an ''Eh, ehh, ehh'' radio himself!
Howard told the guys that it's very strange that this is all coming to an end and they have been very nice to him toward the end. He said that this move has nothing to do with he company, it's all about the FCC. Les said that if they offered him that kind of money, he would have left as well. Howard talked to Les about his wife, Julie Chen, and found out from Gary that they're about to celebrate their first year of marriage. Howard asked Joel when his divorce is coming up so Joel told him to ''calm down big fella!''
Joel and Les had a few more nice words for Howard before he had to take another break. They were joking around about not letting him do his final show but they were just joking.
Howard said that KC finally made it in today. He heard from Gary that he thinks KC is even bigger, muscle wise, than he was before. Fred played the KC Armstrong theme song as KC was coming in. Howard said that one of the things about KC was that he was a good sport when everyone would call him gay. KC said that there were strippers who would come on and he would say he wouldn't bang them and people thought he was gay for saying stuff like that. Robin brought up the time that KC put the Superman costume on and looked amazing in that.
Howard asked KC if he's on the juice now because he's gotten so big. KC said that he is taking testosterone that was prescribed for him. He said that they took blood samples a while back and found out he was low on testosterone so they put him on a prescription. He's gotten even bigger and more muscular. Now he's really good in the sack because of that. Gary said KC told him that he banged this girl 8 times in one day recently.
Artie said that now that he sees KC, he realizes that he genuinely misses him. KC said that he misses them too. He had some mental problems a while back and had to leave the show. KC said that he was able to fool everyone for about 7 years and it eventually fell apart. He said he was always a mess and unhappy but now he's happy. He claims to be 100 percent happy.
KC has gone through some rehab and even brought the guy who runs the rehab center he goes to with him. The guy, Richard, came in and said hello to Howard. He said that KC has made a lot of progress but he still has a way to go. He also said that he had to convince KC that it was okay for him to go on the show because he was very nervous about it.
KC asked for the guys to bring Tom in so he could say something to him. Tom came in a short time later and KC ended up apologizing to him for what he said to him on the phone the last time he called in. He said that he hoped that he would accept his apology and he would like to shake his hand. The two of them shook hands and hugged. It was really special according to Howard. Tom said he wasn't going to cry but this meant a lot to him. He said he was very upset when KC went off on him a few months ago. He said that those days were very hurtful to him but he's willing to forget them. KC told Tom that if he hadn't let him go, he may not have gotten the help he needs so he appreciates that. The two of them sounded like they were on the verge of tears as they were talking to each other.
Howard heard that and said that he might have to go see Brokeback Mountain after hearing those two talking like that. KC said that he felt like drinking after hearing that. It turns out KC has never stopped drinking, he's still doing it. He said that he might be drunk but he's happy. He went on to tell Howard about the great gig that he's got going on out in California now. He's on a show where he gets to pick girls for the Beverly Hills Choppers guy. He said the girl he nailed 8 times was one of the girls he had casted for the Beverly Hills Choppers thing.
KC said that he was with his ex-girlfriend for a while but when that fell through, he started to sample some nectar out there. Gary said that he and Artie used to sit around wondering how a guy as good looking as KC could have the problems that he's got. Artie was talking about how they had an intervention one time with KC about the stuff that was going on with him. Artie said that it was the first intervention he ever went to where the guy who they were intervening with was in better shape than the other guys there.
Howard played some of the classic KC songs like ''Gay Photograph'' and some of the other great songs that Richard Christy created for the show before he was even hired there. KC said that it was a great honor to have so many songs written about him. Richard even wrote a brand new song just for today. It was to the tune of ''To All the Girls I've Loved Before'' but it was about guys.
Artie said that KC actually brought to their attention many of the guys who are regulars on the show now. He turned them on to Richard Chrsity, Bob Levy and others. Now he's picking talent out in California. Richard came in and said that he owes a lot to KC for playing his songs on the air.
Dominic Barbara called in and congratulated him on how far he's come. KC said he has a lot to thank Dominic for. KC said that he's still an angry guy but he's learned to move on instead of dwelling on stuff. Howard had some more classic KC stuff to play. On one show he talked about ''serenading''(instead of marinating) meat for cooking on his George Foreman grill. Howard played that audio clip and KC said he still gets goofed on about that to this day.
KC said that the other day his friend asked him how he made it through college when he says stuff like Serenade instead of marinate. Howard played another clip where KC pronounced Filet Mignon the wrong way which was another classic screw up from KC. The guys got a few more laughs out of that clip. Howard said that he was a little rough on KC over the years but KC didn't seem to think that was the case.
Robin asked KC if he would still have to stay at home after 9/11 if it happened today. KC said he's got a lot of issues. He explained how upset he got that day because he wasn't able to gamble. He also took the next day off to drink because he was so selfish back then. That's the kind of stuff he hates himself for. They used to talk about how KC was the most muscular guy on the show but he was the most afraid of what might happen after 9/11.
The guys ended up talking to Artie about his problems because this morning he asked an intern to go out and get him some toothpaste and mouthwash. Artie said that he overslept the past couple of days and this morning he didn't get up until 5:42 so he had to rush in.
Howard thanked KC for coming in and started to wrap up. KC also told Howard that he wishes him luck with the new place and knows that they'll do great. KC also apologized to everyone out there who hasn't gotten his DVD yet. He said he just sent it to the distributor and they'll be getting it out to everyone soon. Howard gave KC a bunch of plugs and said that he'll be in a new show called ''Son of a Gun.'' You can get more information on that at BeverlyHillsChoppers.com. His DVD, which should be out soon, can be had at DieLaughingDVD.com. His rehab guy, Richard, said that the name of his center is Newport Beach Recovery. KC is also appearing regularly at Ha Has in Hollywood.
Eric the Midget called in to say goodbye to Howard's current radio show. Howard asked him if he was coming down on Friday. Gary came in and interrupted to tell Howard that Les was not censored when he said SIRIUS earlier... but Tom wasn't on the button and Tom told him that if he was on it, he may have hit the button. Howard thought that was kind of odd but quickly got back to Eric the Midget.
Eric told Howard that he will be calling the show even when Howard moves. He thanked Howard for letting him be on the show and for giving him the chance to get on American Dreams. Howard said that this seems to be a different Eric the Midget today. Howard asked Eric what bit he wanted him to play. Eric said he didn't care until Howard mentioned one of the bits that he didn't want played. Howard thanked Eric and called him ''Eric the Actor'' since that's what Eric wants to be known as.
Gary had a list of what was going to happen on Friday during the first hour of the big get together. He quickly went through what will happen but said he was going to save the list of guests for Friday so it'll be a bit of a surprise.
Howard saw that Anastasia the Whore was going to be coming down on Friday. She was on the phone so Howard spent a short time talking to her. She's still whoring and making about $400 an hour doing it. Gary said that she looks kind of like Angelina Jolie in his opinion. She said she'd see them on Friday and got off the phone.
Last night they did run the Jessica story so Howard played a little bit of that interview. Shuli, who is now a reporter for Howard 100 News, got the interview with Jessica. Jessica got upset that Howard didn't invite her down to the final show. She went on and on about how much she supported him over the years and he seems to have forgotten that. Howard and Robin tried to figure out what was really going on because Gary claims that Will left her a couple of messages, last week, to call them back so they could invite her down for the final show.
Jessica complained that she was never invited to one of Howard's birthday shows even though she was the one who introduced Howard and Gary to Hugh Hefner and did so much for them. Howard said that if he had sex with Jessica, there would be no end to what she needs from him. Gary asked him if that ever came up where Jessica offered to have sex with him. Howard said that Jessica used to make it clear to him that she would have sex with him if he wanted. He never caved into that though.
Fred pointed out that they did throw out Jessica's name to be invited to the show a couple of weeks ago. They didn't forget about her. Howard got back to the audio of Jessica where she was saying that Howard wouldn't have the balls to play her interview on the air. Howard didn't know that she said that and he guesses that he still has balls. Robin said that Jessica does make some great radio. Jessica has been mad at the show in the past but she usually gets over it.
Howard listened to more of the news report and said that he really loves those guys, they're doing a great job over there. Gary said that they're really good over there because one of the reporters showed up to a meeting they had about the final show and they're like pit bulls when it comes to getting a story.
Howard played the second part of the interview that Shuli got where Jessica talks about where she thinks the show has gone over the years. She eventually breaks down and cries. Then Shuli, George Flowers and Ralph Howard all start laughing. Jessica was saying that Howard isn't funny anymore and she really misses that Howard. Jessica said that Howard blaming the FCC for his show sucking is B.S. She doesn't think that the other shows he's got on Howard 100 aren't funny but that's where the show is going.
Benjy said he wasn't disagreeing with Howard, he was just voicing his opinion. He said he was humiliated but he agrees that he may not have to be up on stage making a speech. Howard told Benjy to sit down and stop already. Benjy claims that Howard told him he was going to be able to speak on stage on the final day but Howard said he must have made a mistake. He told Benjy to get over himself and calm down already.
Gary swore that it was an honest mistake and he didn't leave him off the list on purpose. Benjy was still complaining and said that it really hurt his feelings. Howard told him never to get up and speak like that again. The guys wondered if Benjy said anything to anyone else about it. He apparently said something to Artie and Artie believes that he should be allowed on stage to say something because he's been with the show for 8 years and has contributed a lot.
Howard was going to make a deal with Benjy but Benjy didn't want a deal. Artie once again broke in and let them know his feelings about the whole thing. Robin and Howard said they had already heard him so he should stop as well. Howard wanted an apology from Benjy for interrupting the show but Benjy wouldn't do it so his mic got turned off. Benjy asked Howard if he would have put his name on the list if he had to come up with one himself. Howard said he would have left him off. Benjy didn't believe it. Gary had also let them know that Benjy was actually left off the list on purpose, he heard from Jason that they took Benjy off because of time constraints.
Benjy read through the list of other people who will be on stage. He was trying to point out that Howard doesn't even acknowledge his sister on the air but she's going to be allowed on stage on Friday. Howard said that he now wants Benjy on the list because he wants to hear what he has to say. Then Gary saw that Beth wasn't on the list. Howard told Gary to take Benjy off the list and put Beth on... and then asked Benjy to write her script.
Robin thought that it was sounding like a jealousy thing between Jessica and Beth. All Howard could say was ''Thank God I never F'd her...'' after hearing what she had to say about him. Jessica continued to go on and on while Shuli dug down and tried to get her to cry more. She knew that Howard was going to listen to the tape and make fun of her. After that the news crew, Shuli, Ralph Howard and George Flowers, all kind of got a chuckle out of the interview. Ralph Howard suggested that they get Jessica on ''Meet the Shrink'' on Howard 100. Howard thought that was a good idea as well.
Gary said that he was praising the news department for being so professional and then they laugh at their interview. Howard took a call from a woman, Dee, who was crying uncontrollably. She was upset that Howard was leaving the air and that she's really going to miss it. Robin told her that they're not dying, they're just moving to satellite. She hung up when Robin brought that up.
Howard said that he's glad that the Jessica thing made it to the air and can't believe that the story was almost killed. He said he's got to straighten some things out over there because there are ''too many cooks'' involved in his stuff over there.
Dee called back in and told Howard that she really is going to miss them when they leave. She was still crying uncontrollably. She said that she's the woman who called in back when Howard's wife had her miscarriage and cried back then to. Howard asked her if there was any chance that she would follow them to the new place. She said she would love to and didn't explain why she wouldn't be able to. Howard asked Dee if she would like to take Benjy's space on the final show and make a speech because she was much more emotional than Benjy. She said that means a lot to her. She said that she used to be a top model back in the 1970s.
Irish John called in and told Dee that he would bring her a satellite radio tuner and give it to her so she can hear the show. As they were talking about the tuners, the delay was hit a couple of times. Howard said that he would let John give her the tuner on the final broadcast so she'll be able to follow them to the new place. Dee thought that was very sweet. Dee will be taking Benjy's spot on the show so he's out again... Howard went to break after giving Benjy the bad news.
Bill said that they're looking to do a movie and an animated series about Sam so things are going well for him. Howard thanked Bill for calling in a short time later and then had Robin start her news.
Scott the Engineer came in to help out with hooking it up. There was a lot of bouncing and noise going on. Things weren't working out the way he thought they would. Scott eventually got it hooked up and it actually worked. Robin thought Howard sounded like he was broadcasting from Mars. He was actually still on his regular microphone. They eventually got him on the classic mic and it sounded like it had a lot more bass in it. It was a bit more muffled than the newer mic. Artie was happy that Howard was happy with the gift because all of the other gifts he's gotten for him haven't gone over very well.
While Howard was messing with the microphone he took a call from a guy who works with Beetlejuice. The guy siad that they're printing up 2000 Beetlejuice masks to hand out on the final show so they can have 2000 Beetlejuices walking from the old studio to the new one.
Ralph called in and sadi that the guys splitting up the cost of that $2,000 gift four ways. Robin said that she had to come in at the last minute because Gary told her that it was actually costing him a lot more than he expected it to. Robin said as long as Howard likes it, she was in. Gary went off on Ralph and asked him what he was going to buy for Howard. Ralph said he didn't get him anything yet but he usually spends $200-300 on him. He thought that the rest of the guys should have picked something out on their own instead of going in on one gift. Robin was the most upset out of the guys and said that she really resents Ralph for saying that to her.
Howard had Robin finish up her news and ended the show around 10:15am. Artie seemed to be amazed that they were down to the final 2 shows and said that it might effect him... He may not eat today because of it. Howard gave him a ''C'mon'' as if he didn't believe a word of that and went to break.
Howard started off the show taking a call from Crazy Cabbie (FreeCabbie.com) who has been in jail since this past summer. Cabbie had to be brief but he wanted to thank Howard and the others who tried to come down to visit him a couple of weeks ago. Artie and Howard told him they were along with Robin and Ronnie when they went down even though they weren't there.
Cabbie told Howard that the place he's in is pretty violent and he's seen some really nasty stuff going on down there. He told Howard that he hasn't had any sex down there and he's actually fended off some attacks and spent some time in ''the hole'' because of it. Howard told Cabbie he wouldn't last a day in there if that's what goes on. Cabbie told him that if he was in there, he'd be locked up somewhere separate from the rest of the people. Around that time his phone time was cut off so the phone cut off very abruptly.
Howard said that tomorrow is the final day for them and the weather forecast is for rain but warmer weather out there. He said he's not looking forward to standing out in the rain though. As he was talking about that Cabbie called back in but his phone got cut off again. Howard said he had no idea that Cabbie was going to be in a place where he was going to be threatened with rape. Artie said that prison is prison and that's the kind of stuff that goes on there.
The guys spent some time remembering all of the crazy things that have gone on over the years with Cabbie and how he was a pretty big part of the show. Artie said that he actually voted for Cabbie in the ''Win John's Job'' contest they had because he figured every week would be an adventure.
Cabbie called back once again so Howard tried to bring up the funny stuff that they've done with him... Then his phone cut off once again. Howard had Fred playing Cabbie's girlfriend singing ''KC's Gay'' song parody which was one of the funny moments on the show.
Cabbie called back and quickly told Howard that he really appreciates what Howard's fans have written in for him. He was also saying that he still needs some soft core porn where there are no nips or bush showing and self-addressed, stamped envelopes from anyone who wants to hear back from him. Cabbie said that the place is really sad and he really hates it. Cabbie said he really had to go after that.
Howard played a prank call that Cabbie did on his show when a guy called the wrong number trying to cancel his AOL service. He also played the Cabbie song parody that they used to play quite a bit back in the days when Cabbie was a regular on the show. Robin wondered if there will be a difference with Cabbie when he finally does get out of prison. Howard said there will definitely be a difference.
Howard took a call from a guy who remembered the first time he saw Cabbie running in a foot race against High Pitch Eric. They spent a few seconds on that and then Howard mentioned that Jackie 'The Joke Man'' Martling would be returning to the show today to say goodbye. Fred played some of Jackie's classic one liner jokes that he was famous for. The caller also mentioned Cabbie's FreeCabbie.com where you can send him donations and stuff like that.
Howard said that they've invited everyone to come down tomorrow and it's going to be huge... but the weather may suck. He said that there is no rain date for the show so they can't reschedule it. Howard figures he'll go out and do what he can and probably get pneumonia. He's canceled his Saturday Night Live appearance because he's really got too much going on right now. He said he will reschedule for some other time, probably in January or February.
Howard mentioned that the sponsor of the final show will be TomatoVine.com. He'll have $10,000 to give away tomorrow as well.
King of All Blacks called in and said that the weather won't be as bad as some people are saying it will be. He heard that the snow is going to taper off around 2 in the morning and it'll warm up later in the morning. Howard said he's going to go out there no matter what.
Howard said that after the show is over, he's going to take some fans over to the Hard Rock Cafe for a special performance from Sheryl Crowe. He said he's got a special way of picking the people from the crowd and he'll reveal that tomorrow.
King told Howard that he saw his Entertainment Tonight segment last night and thought it was pretty good. Howard said he didn't think it was all that great and went on to talk about what he thought about it. He said he liked the woman who interviewed him. He said that he did the interview and gave Vanessa Minillo a tour of the new place but she barely used any of it. He said that Us Magazine did the same thing. He was also on The Best Damn Sport Show last night but hasn't seen that. Then there's Esquire Magazine which comes out today. He said that article is good and he liked being with Jon Stewart on The Daily Show the other night.
Howard read some mail he got about his Daily Show appearance. A bunch of people liked that appearance. King told Howard that he thought his Entertainment Tonight interview was the best of them all. He and his wife watched it and thought he looked good and looked happy. King told Howard that he'll be down tomorrow for the final show.
Howard said a few thank-yous to people like Mike the Door Man and Nancy the Receptionist who has been there ever since they started there at WXRK. They've known her for 20 years now. Howard said a few nice words about her and then went to break.
Howard said that Tom gave him a really nice gift of a watch with all of his years counted up on the back. Gary said that Tom gave that to all four of the original cast, Fred, Howard, Robin and Gary. Howard said the only problem with the watch is that it doesn't have numbers on it. He said he hates watches where you can't tell the time. Gary said that Doug over at In Demand gave him a watch the other day that was kind of confusing to look at because of the way it's laid out with analog and digital.
Howard said they have a sign in the studio that says ''Howard Stern'' on it and someone stole the He from it. He also said that some of the DJs there ripped down the K-Rock signs and put up some tombstones that read R.I.P. because they're getting rid of the rock format.
Yesterday Gary saw that some guys were pulling some new cable into the studio for David Lee Roth because he wants to be able to watch all of the news channels while he's doing his broadcast. Tom Chiusano came in and said a few words to the guys. He said he started to cry when he gave Robin her watch and had to leave the room. He said that he's gotten much more emotional since his battle with cancer. Now he breaks down and cries when he goes to weddings and stuff like that.
Howard asked Tom if he's able to read the time on the watch that doesn't have any numbers on it. Howard asked Tom what the watch cost him but Tom told him it was none of his business. Gary said that Stuttering John used to get gifts and then he'd hand them off to Jason to look up it's cost on the web.
Tom told Howard that they're going to have to do some work in the studio before everything is moved out. They have to have everything out of there by Sunday night at midnight. He said that they have about double the work they though they were going to have and they don't have a lot of time to get it done. Gary said that they'll probably have to come in on Saturday to clear out some of their stuff. Howard said that it seems like they can't wait to get rid of them there.
Gary said he saw David Lee yesterday and he was walking around like he was the president there. Howard said he wishes David Lee luck taking over for him and he's thinking that it will be a very successful show.
Howard was going to play one of Tom's favorite moments from the show. He said that he didn't think it was a good moment at first but now he's thinking that it was a good moment. Tom picked the Cabbie and Stuttering John fight that went down back in 2002. They've edited it down to a short version and Howard thinks that it was very interesting. Tom told Howard that he had to get licensed to be a fight promoter in New Jersey to make the fight happen so it was quite an experience for him.
Howard played some audio from the fight where John and Cabbie beat the crap out of each other. Stuttering John ended up winning the fight and bragged about the win after finding out he had won. Gary said he thought John sounded kind of like Scott the Engineer when he was yelling about his win. The guys spent a short time talking about how Cabbie didn't really train for the fight and that may have been the reason he lost. Howard wrapped up and went to break after that.
Someone said that WNCX out in Cleveland was running a nice promo where they thank Howard for the years he worked there. Howard had a caller on the phone who had some speech problems because he took some shrapnel over in Afghanistan when he was serving. Howard spent a minute talking to the guy about that and then had him play the WNCX promo. They thanked him for the 13 years that he's been on their station and thanked the fans for listening. They said they'll be playing Best of Stern through December 30th and then David Lee Roth will be taking over in January. Howard thought that was a very classy move on their part.
The caller wanted to play one last game before the show ends but Howard wasn't sure if he had anything to give away. Artie offered to send him a DVD since Gary had nothing. Gary said that maybe Steven Singer Jewelers could send him something too. Benjy said that he was willing to send the guy the remains of the Real Doll too. Howard also said that he would send the guy any Christmas gifts that he gets that he doesn't like. Even the caller didn't want the Scott the Engineer DVDs that Howard got. Robin wondered what this guy does. He said that he's gone through a couple of surgeries so far and has some more coming up to fix his injured face. Howard let him go and said he'd send him all of that stuff they were talking about.
Howard also talked about a party he went to where Joan had a young girl with AIDS that she was trying to help. Howard said that was pretty tough. Joan also answered the door one time dressed in a negligee. Then there was the time that Howard tried to come on to her back stage during their WWOR TV show days. She turned him down immediately and it was captured on a hidden camera. Joan told Howard that she went out and bought a car just so she can listen to him when he moves to the new place.
Howard got back to the email he was reading earlier. Some people thought that KC's appearance was very touching yesterday. KC is scheduled to be in the Super Fan Round Table on Howard 100 tonight. Howard said he's also trying to get KC to do the Meet the Shrink show over there.
There were other emailers who liked hearing Gary the Retard saying goodbye. Some people wrote in about Benjy's outburst yesterday and how they don't know why he sticks around there taking all of the abuse from Howard. Robin reminded everyone that Benjy will have his own show on Monday morning in place of The Best of Stern. Howard read some mail about Jackie's upcoming appearance and how they think that Artie sucks.
Howard read a blog post from Tom Green's web site where he talked about Howard's appearance on Bill O'Reilly's show. He was really nice about it and encouraged people to go out and get SIRIUS radios to support him.
Melrose Larry Green called in and asked if they could come in and warm up a bit. Howard told the guys to let Melrose and Stoner Dude in the station so they could warm up a bit.
Another caller told Howard that the picture of him in Us Magazine was pretty good. Howard talked about that and the Esquire Magazine article that's out today.
Howard spent some time thanking his Howard 100 News team that's been doing an amazing job over at Howard 100 reporting on everything Howard. He took a couple more phone calls and let some people say some nice words about the show. He had to get Jackie The Joke Man in there since he was waiting out in the green room.
Wayne Segal from Legend Auto Group called in to thank Howard for what he's done to help him grow his company. He also thanked him for his friendship over the years. He started to ramble a bit so Howard cut him off and got in some promotion for the final show. He had to take a break after that.
As Jackie was coming in they played some classic bits. Jackie went to shake Howard's hand even though Howard was sick. Howard told him he was sick but Jackie didn't care. Howard told him that Artie was willing to give up the old Jackie chair but Jackie didn't want to sit there.
Jackie and Howard both said that it was great to see each other. They talked about the old days. Howard said that Jackie wrote a lot of great stuff for the show including the name ''King of All Media.'' Jackie said that he actually came up with ''King of Media'' and Howard added the ''all.'' Jackie said it was kind of strange coming in this morning and seeing that the studio was very open, unlike he remembered. Howard told him that they've been ripping it apart since their last day is tomorrow.
Howard talked to Jackie about his divorce from Nancy Sirianni that went down after he left the show. Jackie said they were pretty much separated for a few years before they actually got divorced. Jackie also told Howard that he misses the money and fame he got from the show. He is kind of sad that he left the show.
Howard talked to Jackie about the money he turned down to sty on the show. Jackie told Howard that he was never able to go to sleep at an early hour all that time he was working on the show. He said he was miserable all the time because of the lack of sleep. He knew that he never would have been able to stop drinking or get away from Nancy if he didn't leave the show. He would have continued in the same lifestyle that he was living. Jackie said he had to leave the show or get a ton of money.
Jackie thinks that the deal he wanted to make wasn't all that unreasonable, even 5 years later. Howard said he kind of had a feeling that Jackie and Nancy were in trouble years before he left. Jackie said that's the way a lot of marriages are. He said he's been dating since getting his divorce so Howard wondered if he can get women at the age of 60. Jackie didn't seem to have any trouble.
Fred was talking about having lunch with Jackie but he never brought it up on the air. Fred said he was mad at Jackie for a while because of the way he walked off the show. He claims to be past the anger but he was still arguing with Jackie about the way he left them hanging high and dry. Jackie said that he doesn't believe that's the case. Fred and Howard think that the deal they were going to give to Jackie was more than reasonable but Jackie didn't take it. Jackie said that it was his decision to make though, not Fred or Howard's.
Jackie said that he wasn't even sure if Howard was going to be sticking around back then because it was in contract negotiation time. Jackie thinks that everyone knew that he wasn't coming back in that one Monday because Tom knew about it. That led to Tom Chiusano coming in to talk about the offer they made for Jackie. They were going to give him a 5 year contract to work at the station and it was a great deal.
Gary came in and started to say something but Jackie interrupted and said that he'd forgotten about ''those lips'' and had to stare at them. He said he remembers the days when Gary would come in and try to talk to Howard while trying to get those lips over his teeth. Gary said that it was Jackie and Stuttering John who would eat away at him by making fun of his lips and teeth. Howard remembered the days when he and Jackie would paint pictures of Gary's lips and teeth to get rid of their stress. Howard said he still has those paintings to this day.
Jackie and the guys were laughing and having some fun talking about the old days. Jackie also said he always hears how great Artie is as a replacement. Jackie said some words about Benjy who he thinks he owes about $4000 to. Benjy used to buy everyone breakfast and never asked for any money from them.
Gary talked about the way Jackie would always goof on him when he was in the studio. He said he used to goof on him through e-mail as well. One time Gary misspelled ''Make'' as ''Amke'' and Jackie still goofs on him about that to this day. He said he still gets e-mail from Jackie where he goofs on him about that misspelled word.
Jackie told a couple more great stories about Gary and his ''Mighty Joe Young'' head. He also told Howard that he had to congratulate him about his move to SIRIUS. He said it's going to be a great thing. Howard gave Jackie a plug for his Jokemaster Jr. joke telling machine. Jackie said that those things are making him a lot of money.
Howard gave Jackie another plug for a comedy gig he's doing at Ferraras in Point Pleasant, New Jersey on Tuesday. Jackie said that the place seats 90 people so he's doing some big gigs these days.
Gary asked Jackie how many homes he has today. Jackie used to own about 5 but now he's down to two. He said he's been cut in half money wise a few times over the past 5 years.
Dominic Barbara called in and said that Jackie was the one who coined the phrase ''Bloated Attorney'' for him. He brought up the time that Jackie's basement got flooded and how they goofed on him about that for a long time. Another caller said that she's loved Jackie for the past 15 years and she's thrilled that he's on the show today. She said that Jackie actually bit her chest as he was taking a picture with her. That led to Howard talking about how Jackie is unable to control himself sometimes and once stuck his finger in someone's ass when they mooned a camera.
Gary brought up a meeting they had one time for a sexual harassment lecture and Jackie brought in a huge, fake penis. Tom was kind of upset about that because they had just had a sexual harassment suit.
Howard said that Jackie's appearance today was being sponsored by the movie ''Havoc'' which is available on DVD. Gary said that the sponsor was supposed to sponsor Mike Tyson who was supposed to be on yesterday. That fell through so they decided to sponsor Jackie instead.
Howard wanted to play some classic Jackie moments from the show. In the first clip Jackie had to apologize to his wife Nancy on the air after an incident with Jessica Hahn on a trip to Philly. Jackie told the story because Howard had it a little wrong. Jackie and Howard had gotten into a tub with Jessica Hahn but Jackie kept his pants on. After Nancy heard about it she left the house. He had to do something to save the relationship so he made the classic speech where he apologized to her. Robin said that Howard had started the show as he usually does and Jackie took the mic from him so he could make that apology. Jackie said he only did that one other time and that was when his Jetty had floated away and he wanted people to keep their eyes out for it.
Howard took some phone calls and people were thinking that it was like having the Beatles reunited. Howard played some of Jackie's songs that they've goofed on in the past. Howard played some audio of Jackie reading from Robin's book ''Quivers: A Life'' while doing his impression of her. It was getting a bunch of laughs from the guys in the studio then and now. Robin said that Jackie and Ralph are two people who do impressions of her like that.
Howard took a call from the King of All Jackie Haters who wanted to be the final guy to say ''F-Jackie.'' Jackie then went on to say that he's got a new production company called Jokeland Films and they'll be making a movie called ''Lucky.'' He's looking forward to getting that made so he can say ''I told you so.'' Howard said that's what he loved about Jackie, he was always caught up in some cockamamie scheme.
A caller played one last game of ''Stump the Joke Man'' and asked Jackie if he knew the punch line for ''What would you call The Flintstones if they were black?'' Jackie knew the answer but didn't say what it was... It was the N-word.
Tom had Howard get in some mentions for tomorrow's show and some of the sponsors who have helped out. They also got in some mentions for where people are supposed to gather and at what time they're supposed to get there. Read more here.
Tom said that he remembers that Jackie used to laugh the hardest at his own jokes when Howard would read them on the air. Jackie said that wasn't the case, he would laugh at the funniest jokes. Sometimes they were Fred's jokes, sometimes they were his own. Gary said that's not true because Jackie would laugh at his own jokes even if they weren't funny.
A caller asked Howard would ever bring Jackie back to the show when they move. Jackie told the guy that they have a full house and they don't need another guy. Artie has taken over Jackie's chair and done a great job according to Howard. It was a tough seat to fill and Artie has done a great job.
Howard and the guys had a lot of stories to tell about Jackie so they tried to get in as many as possible. Howard remembered one time when they were out in Vegas and Jackie had all kinds of food on his bed with him even though he was on a diet at the time. Jackie didn't care at the time because they were in Vegas.
Howard told Jackie it was great to have him back. Artie told Jackie how he and his friends used to go see him years ago and laughed their asses off each time. He said it's an honor to have filled the seat that Jackie made famous. Howard said there were too many memories and he didn't have enough time to get to more. He gave Jackie a few more plugs and wrapped up. You can find out more about all of Jackie's plugs and appearances at JokeLand.com
Howard told Don that he doesn't know what to say to him but after meeting him it changed his life. He said that he is his rock and the guy he can turn to in his personal and professional life to get advice. Don has been there for him through everything from his WNBC days right up until today. He said he went through a few agents back in the NBC days and finally met Don.
Howard said that Don believed in him more than he even believed in himself back then. He had an instant connection with him and Don is the guy who came to him after he was fired from WNBC and opened up a bottle of champagne and told him it was going to be the best thing that ever happened to him. Robin remembers those days as well and how happy Don was when they got fired from NBC. They were actually drinking champagne after getting fired instead of getting upset. Don then guided Howard along the way and got him to where he is today.
Howard said that Don is the reason that his show has gone to where it has. He wanted to thank Don for everything he's done and told him how special and dear he is to him. Don said that the feeling is mutual and it's been a tremendous experience. He feels that they've pioneered their way into the radio industry and will continue to do that at the new place. Don and Howard both said that they've had a lot of fun together over the years. Don wasn't going to cry or anything but he was a bit emotional about this.
Artie said he can tell that Howard has a lot of trust in Don and it shows. Don actually has all of their backs and helps them all make their deals so they can keep growing. Howard said it is kind of sad that they're leaving terrestrial radio but they're not able to grow there. Don said that Infinity will continue on without them and do just fine without them.
Howard said that they've made history working there at WXRK and Infinity Broadcasting. Don said he wanted to come in and say goodbye to Howard's current show and to invite the fans to come along with them when they move to the new place.
Howard said that Don has taught him to have some fun over the years because he used to be all business. Don said that Howard has to enjoy the success sometimes and just let loose. Howard asked Don if he loves him more than he loves his own wife. Don said it was a toss up but he can't really say because his wife might be listening this morning. Howard wrapped up with Don and took a break a short time later.
Howard took a call from The Sim who said that this was one of the best shows yet and he and other fans were very happy that Jackie was back. The Sim asked if he could get into the VIP section tomorrow but Gary told him they were all full and wouldn't be able to let him in.
Howard took a call from an old friend by the name of Donny Simpson who was one of the first radio guys that Howard met in Washington when he started working there. Donny said that he met Howard and the guys about 25 years ago and wanted to say goodbye to them. He said that Howard has set the bar very high and he'll always be a fan. Howard let him quickly say goodbye and Gary said he's got a great voice for radio. Howard let Donny go but continued to talk about how he helped Donny out with a contract negotiation back in those days.
Howard said that Carol was supposed to cry but she didn't break down. Nancy the Receptionist came in next and had already been crying. Howard told Nancy that she represented the station to him because she's the first person he sees in the morning and the last person he sees as he's walking out. He asked her for her thoughts about the show but she wasn't able to speak. Howard told her that he was going to miss her and she told him the same as she was crying.
Bucky the Salesman, Jodi in Promotions and Denise all came in to say goodbye to Howard next. Bucky told a story about how he once sold a commercial spot for a record $30,000 so he was very well known for that. Howard said that without the advertisers, they'd have nothing so Bucky means a lot to the show. Howard said that Bucky is great at selling stuff so they once prank called him and asked him if he could sell all kinds of crazy stuff. Howard played the audio from that call where Gary asked Bucky if they could sponsor Howard's bodily noises. Bucky loved the idea of some of that stuff and said he could sell it. He didn't think he could sell Howard's movements though.
Howard said that he wanted to say goodbye to Jodi who is their promotions manager there at the station. Gary said that Jodi is very protective of the Howard Stern name. Jodi thanked Howard for everything he's done for them and for making her laugh every morning. Howard said that Jodi is a great worker and thanked her for her contribution to the show.
Next up was Denise who is Tom Chiusano's office manager. Howard said that she's always helped them out when they've asked her and she's a doll. He said he'll always have a warm spot in his heart for her and the other people who have helped out the show over the years. Howard thanked all of the crew who were in there and let them go. He had a lot of people on the phone who wanted to say goodbye but he didn't have time to get to everything. Gary said he couldn't believe that they only have one show left.
Artie said he doesn't have any pressure on him as far as tomorrow's show goes. He's still looking at himself as a fan and the pressure is actually on Howard and the guys.
Howard took a call from Eddie the Produce Guy who said that the cops are setting up barriers down on the street and he's going to be there tomorrow. Howard said that it's going to get kind of crazy out there. Someone sent him an e-mail saying that there's a college that's apparently closing down tomorrow for the final show. He was trying to find it but spilled some water on his console. Artie gave him some napkins to clean up and Robin asked him if he was going to shave for tomorrow because he's looking kind of ''grizzly'' this week. Artie said he wasn't going to shave unless Robin wants him to.
Richard Christy came in and gave Howard a framed picture of his ''DNA.'' Howard said that was gross and wanted them to throw it away. Sal and Richard both said that those were goofy gifts and they had normal gifts for him. Richard said he got Howard a Herman Munster doll, a scarf and some gloves and a few other things. Sal said that he got Howard some books about John Lennon, a wine list, super heroes and other stuff. Howard wanted to give all of that stuff away to the fans tomorrow because he's not really into reading that stuff. Howard wasn't interested in any of that stuff even though it was everything that Howard is interested in.
Double A called in during the news and Howard told him he's starting to become a pain in the ass. He was complaining yesterday that he wasn't getting on the final broadcast, he was downstairs this morning and now he's calling in today. Ronnie came in and said that Double A is starting to scare him because of the way he's been getting up there and the way he's talking about doing the show. Gary said that Angelo is a great guy but he's jonesing for some air time right now.
Howard told Double A that he's going to be around and he's got to calm down a bit. He hung up on him because he kept going on and on. Gary said that there's not a lot of time to let people get up on stage tomorrow so they have to drop a lot of people. They have very limited time. Double A will be part of the festivities tomorrow and he doesn't know why he's making such a big deal out of everything.
Later on in the news Howard said that there are a lot of people getting involved in the final show he's doing tomorrow. He said that the Brookstone store near them is going to be giving away some pillows that say something about him. There are a bunch of strip clubs that are bringing girls down for the fans and Sheryl Crowe is going to be performing for them at the Hard Rock Cafe after the show.
Doug Goodstein from In Demand came in and said that he's seen the movie and it's really awful but he's able to watch it over and over again because it's so funny. The movie is set to debut on Howard Stern On Demand on January 1st. Doug told Howard he's the best and he'll see them on the other side.
High Pitch Eric, who got a horrible review from Richard Roeper, called in and asked what Howard is doing with all of the furniture in the green room. Howard said they're taking the pictures with them but they may be able to give away pieces of the studio to the fans out on the street.
Howard had Robin finish up her final newscast. Artie got in a final plug for an appearance he's making on Saturday at Coconuts in Totowa, New Jersey where he'll be signing copies of his DVD. Howard said that he can't believe that the last show is coming up tomorrow. He ended this second to last show at about 10:20am.
Howard started off his final terrestrial radio show by welcoming everyone after listening to ''Imagine.'' He went on to talk about the rain out in New York City. It was fairly warm out though and he told everyone to come down there to see the final show.
Gary was down on the street so Howard was talking to him via walkie talkie. When Gary came through you could hear a lot of people behind him cheering and making noise. Gary told Howard it was really warm out down there but it was kind of wet out. Robin said she came in and saw a lot of TV trucks out there this morning and she didn't see any people out there. Now they're out there and it's warm out so it should be great. Howard said they'll go out at about 8:30 or 8:45 and they'll make their speeches.
The band Staind will be out there to play the Beetlejuice Song for the crowd sometime later this morning. Howard said he'll be making a speech of his own and it might be a little bit long. Robin mentioned a speech that Dead Air Dave made before the show this morning and he was really good. Howard said that Dave has been his guy lately and they see eye to eye on a lot of stuff.
Howard went back to Gary and had him talking to the crowd out there. Gary said that the crowd was pushing on the barriers that were set up. He said there was a woman down there in a trench coat who was naked underneath. She had all kinds of stuff written about Howard's move to the new place. Gary said there were people with signs that Gary talked about. He went over to the naked chick so Howard could talk to her. He had some trouble getting over to her but he read what she had written on her. The woman said that she was out there since 11:30 last night.
Artie was making his way in so Gary stopped him and let him say a few words. Gary said that NBC was down there to interview him so he did that live on the air. Vivian Lee from NBC asked Gary how he felt to have all of the fans out there today. Gary relayed a message from Howard to Vivian about how he was feeling about the morning.
After Gary's quick interview he got back to the naked chick who said she wanted to come up and get naked for him. Gary told Howard that she's cute but wouldn't say that she was hot. Howard thought that he had to do this one on one with the crowd so he bailed out on talking to him.
Artie was finally up to the studio and told Howard how nuts things were getting down on the street. He was ready to start drinking too so he showed Howard some of the stuff he had in there. He had Single Barrel Jack Daniels which is supposed to be great.
Howard said that there are a lot of special guests coming in today. He heard that Chris Rock was coming down. He went on to talk about what would be going on today and how Yahoo! will be covering the festivities today.
Howard took a call from Doug Goodstein who was also out on the street helping out with the video shoot for Howard Stern On Demand. Doug told Howard about some of the guests who were out there and it was completely insane. All of the popular guests from the show were all gathering there. Doug said he was really touched that they were all there.
Howard cut away from Doug and tried to see what was up at Yahoo!. Artie said the rain out there really wasn't that bad and the fans should all be out there. Howard wasn't able to find the video feed from Yahoo!. Robin tried to find it as well but it wasn't happening for her either.
Richard Christy asked Howard what he wanted to drink. Howard told him to just start pouring the champagne. Artie wanted a cup with ice for his Jack and water.
A caller told Howard that the show has been amazing the past few days and he loved that Jackie was back on yesterday. Howard said he had a lot to talk about this morning but he didn't want to blow his load first thing. A woman called in and asked where she was supposed to go this morning. Robin let her know that it was on 56th between 5th and 6th Ave. Vinnie Favale called in and told Howard he was on his way in to the big gathering. He was going to be getting on the bus and listening to the show like he's been doing for the past 20 years.
Howard tried to get Gary back on the walkie talkie. When he got him he asked about Yahoo! because it appeared they weren't going to start showing anything until 9 o'clock. Howard said that they should have started first thing in the morning showing everyone what was going on. Gary said that they were capturing stuff to edit to make it more interesting. They probably won't start showing stuff until 9 and then they may mix it between pre-taped and live coverage.
Gary was talking to Howard on mic as well as the walkie talkie but when he got on mic around 6:20 there was a guy testing out another mic for the band Staind. It was kind of distracting so Howard ended up taking his first break. As he was getting ready to go to break Ronnie let him know that they had a lot of chicks up there from the Bunny Ranch and Scores. Howard said that they've been asked to take breaks often this morning so they can fit everything in by 10 o'clock or so. Today's show was being sponsored mostly by TomatoVine.com
After the break Fred played a clip where they remembered the conversation that AJ and Donald Trump had about a girlfriend that they shared and AJ threatened to kill Trump one day. They also played a news clip where they talked about Howard's upcoming final show that was going to be covered by Yahoo! today. Howard then talked about all of the people that were gathering out on the street already. It was drizzling outside but the rain should be dissipating within an hour or so.
Sal came in and showed Howard some pictures of the chicks who were showing their boobs out on the street. Howard had the guys bring in some of the hot chicks they had out in the green room. Sal said that some of them were Bunny Ranch chicks, some were Scores chicks. There was a party going on up there already with all of those people.
Jason took Gary's place out on the street while Gary came up to the studio. Jason told Howard that it was nice and warm down there and he was going to take his jacket off son. He went over to the crowd and let some of the fans talk to Howard. Hook Nose Mike said a couple of words but it sounded like he was a mile away from them. Howard told Gary to go down there and take over the microphone duties because it wasn't working out with Jason.
King of All Blacks called in from the green room and talked about what Angry Black was wearing today and how wrong it all was. He was goofing on the clothes the guy was wearing and bragging that he was wearing nicer stuff than Angry Black was. King said that Angry was wearing a hockey shirt and that's really whack according to King. Howard invited King and Angry into the studio to talk about that.
Gary told Howard that Amy Lynn was there and she has been avoiding the aging process somehow. He said that she looks really good after all of these years.
Artie told Howard that he wrote a speech yesterday after thinking that he wasn't going to be able to do it. He hadn't started drinking this morning yet so he was going to be brushing his teeth before he started that. Howard talked about the way Artie has been coming in late the past week and brushing his teeth when he gets to work. It's kind of strange.
Howard said he went to bed at about 8:30 last night but he was up by 1 in the morning. He really needed some sleep before this show today so he had some food and tried to get back to sleep. By 2 in the morning he was still wide awake so he took an Ambien at about 2:30. That's the worst thing he could do but he was up by 4:30. Gary said that he gets a headache when he doesn't get enough sleep after taking one of those things.
Sal came in and told Howard that it was getting so crazy down on the street that they were threatening to pull the permit for the gathering. He was asked to make an announcement to the crowd to stop rushing the barriers. Howard told him to go tell Gary that and he'd take care of things. Howard let Amy Lynn go after that.
Jason spoke to some other fans who were out there. One guy thanked Howard for all of the years that he's helped get him by. Gary came in and told Howard that they have to start giving some money away. They have $10,000 to give to the people out there. Ralph came in and told Howard that it was nice and warm out there and the rain wasn't all that bad. Gary said that he saw Ralph on the Super Fan Round Table last night over at SIRIUS and it was probably the greatest one yet.
He and Ralph talked about Steve Grillo and how he was like a cartoon of himself on the show. Gary said that Steve had like 3 mental breakdowns on that show last night. He was going nuts on Jackie and other things. Ralph said that KC showed up to the show about 2 hours late and he looked kind of odd to him.
Steve Grillo, a former intern on the show, said that he didn't think that Jackie sounded like Jackie when he was on yesterday. He thought that Howard treated him too nice when he came in. Howard said that's the way he wanted things to go though. He didn't want to get into a fight with him.
There were a lot of great discussions on the Round Table show last night about Jackie and Artie. Everyone seemed to think that Artie handled things really well with Jackie. Howard wanted to start ripping apart the couch in the studio to hand out to the crowd. Howard said everything else was pretty much gone from the studio except for the carts. Howard was wondering if he should play anything that they haven't played since he won't be able to play most of it at the new place.
Robin said that things are going to get wild out there on the street but Steve and Ralph said that it was already getting nuts. Howard had to take another break a short time later.
Sal was on the mic down on the street getting the crowd all wound up. Howard asked Sal what the weather was like. Sal said it sucked but the fans didn't care. He asked Sal to say hello to some people out there. Sal went over to a guy who he thought looked Mexican but the guy said he was actually Italian. Howard gave up on Sal a few seconds later.
Announcer Paul Tuner was there in the studio. He used to do a lot of Howard's announcing and was there to introduce everyone out on the street. Howard introduced some of the girls they had there to Paul since Paul is no longer married. The girls were all drinking and making a lot of noise. There were girls from Scores and girls from The Bunny Ranch who were going back and forth about who could drink the most. Howard thanked all of the girls from the Bunny Ranch for coming out but he heard that they weren't getting any action there.
Howard said hello to Al Rosenberg who used to work with them. Al said that he envies everyone in the studio and said some nice words about him. Dr. Sal Calabro was there as well so Howard said a quick hello to him. Sal thanked Howard for everything he's done for him. Sam Simon was there so Howard said hello to him. Sam said he had to beg for an invitation out there but he really appreciates what Howard does. He thanked Howard for that before Howard moved on to King of All Blacks and Angry Black.
King of all Blacks immediately started to goof on Angry Black about the hockey shirt he was wearing. The two of them were wearing similar shoes but King claims his are better. He said that Angry was wearing soft bottom ''Tim's'' while he had the hard bottoms. He said that Angry's shoes are about half the cost of his. King is very materialistic. He was picking apart Angry about everything he was wearing but Howard had to cut them off to move on to some other people.
Howard said that Stan Dwarken was there and he was his running mate back when he was going to run for governor. Stan said a few nice words about where Howard is moving to.
Gary said that last night on Super Fan Round Table they talked Jessica Hahn and even Jessica admits that she sounded kind of crazy in her interviews earlier in the week. They were sad that Jessica wasn't there this morning.
Howard went back down to Sal on the street and the crowd sounded huge. They were cheering for Howard and Sal sounded like he was about to pass out from the excitement.
The guys played a tribute song that they created after Hank passed away called ''Hanks Way'' to the tune of ''My Way.'' Howard said he loves Hank and wishes that he could be there today, his last day on terrestrial radio.
Robin had popped open a bottle of champagne and toasted Hank along with Artie who had some Jack Daniels. Howard said that they would be starting the speeches in about a half hour and they had a few more things to get to before that. Artie told Howard that what's going on outside is really special and it's going to be great when they go out there later on. Artie said that he's sure that if he hadn't gotten into show business, he would be one of the fans out on the street celebrating. He figures he would have gotten a day off from the manure shoveling plant to come down.
When Howard moves to SIRIUS he thinks that he'll be forming his own little community of people who will be paying to hear his show. He said it is sad to say goodbye though. Gary came in and said that Staind is handing out lyric sheets so everyone in the crowd can sing along with them when the perform The Beetlejuice Song. Gary was heading down to the street to get ready for the rest of the show. It was his last time in the studio on the air.
Howard said that Beetlejuice would be giving away one of his huge front teeth that he lost a couple of years back. They saved the tooth and they'll be giving it away to one lucky(?) fan.
Richard Christy came in and told Howard how crazy things are upstairs where people are waiting to come on. Howard told Richard that if he doesn't get laid today then there's really something wrong with him. Richard was about to take a shot of Thor's Hammer vodka while Artie took another shot of Jack. They both took the shots and made some funny faces according to Robin. Richard said that was the biggest shot that he's ever taken. He felt like he was about to vomit because of that. Howard had to take another break a short time later.
Howard's family joined him in the studio after the song played. He said that his father Ben was there so he tried to introduce his grandchildren Emily, Debra and Ashley but he couldn't remember Ashley's middle name. Howard thanked everyone for coming down and asked his mother to say a few words. She had a speech prepared for when they go outside. Ben said that he's got one as well. Howard's sister Ellen tried to get her headphones to work but they weren't. Ellen told Howard that this was her first time up to the studio so Howard told her that it was time to take her top off. He was just kidding of course. He also said hello to his brother in law Peter and his niece Pamela.
Howard said hello to his daughter Emily who was there to see him off. Emily was on the cover of the NY Post back when Howard got fired from NBC. Howard said that he remembers the days when he played with his young niece and used to change her diapers. He remembers trying to get a job out in Pennsylvania at some rock station out there. They hated him. Robin said that was funny because she had her first job out in Camp Hill, Pennsylvania. Howard thanked his family for putting up with him. He asked Ben if he was feeling emotional about this whole thing. Ben said he did get kind of emotional as he listened to the start of the show today. Emily said she didn't want to say anything to the crowd today but did say that she loves her daddy.
Artie told Howard that he was starting to feel emotional about all of this stuff. He said he used to be a fan and now he's on the show so that means a lot to him. Howard took a call from a guy who said he was on the street and saw a woman giving a guy oral right there on the street. Artie predicted that in 18 years there will be a lot of ugly college students who were produced on this day. Howard had to take another break before getting to the speeches out on the street.
Howard went to Sal who was down on 56th Street. Sal told him that the barricades have come down about three times so the cops had to rebuild them each time. He cut away from Sal again after just a few short minutes.
Howard said that he teared up earlier when he was listening to Desperado and looked around the room seeing his family there. He went on to play some of the speeches that they missed during the break. They were on such a tight schedule that they had to record stuff during the break. Cliff Pallete and Fred the Elephant Boy were the first two to make speeches. Fred gave a ''Free at Last'' speech that was just about unintelligible. He was screaming something about Jack Daniels and a post office. Cliff Pallete got up and tried to make a speech but the crowd wasn't really responding to them.
Howard said he asked Scott the Engineer to mic the crowd and set up a PA system so they could hear the speeches but he's not sure they can. Robin and Howard tried to figure out what Cliff said but it wasn't possible. He cut away to the live speeches and heard Beetlejuice making his rambling speech. Beet was talking to the crowd instead of making a speech. He was blurting out nonsense so Howard cut away from him.
Miss Howard Stern, Andrea Brooke, made a short speech about Howard. She said it had been a privilege and an honor to have been Miss Howard Stern and Sal kept asking where Jason was so he was cutting her off. It was a nightmare. Will came in and told Howard that the crowd was taking up a whole city block from what he could see. It was people from 5th Ave to 6th Ave.
Tom came in and told Howard that the crowd is unbelievable. He's never seen anything like this before because there were people as far as they could see. Staind was about to perform ''The Beetlejuice Song'' so Howard cut away to that and listened in as they did their thing. The crowd were handed lyric sheets so they could sing along as well. Howard ended up cutting away to a pre-recorded speech from Jeff the Drunk since Staind wasn't starting right away.
Jeff said hello to the crowd and made a nice speech about Howard. He said Howard was the only man he's ever loved other than his own father. He said that Howard rules and told him to enjoy his new job. Howard cut back to Staind but they still hadn't started their song.
Howard said that they had Courtney Cums there so Howard spoke to her. He said that she was willing to have sex with someone from the crowd so Howard tried to figure out a way to pick someone. She's been in the porn business for about a year now and she's definitely willing to have sex with a fan. Howard told Will to tell Gary to pick out ten $1000 winners to give away the money and to pick one guy to have sex with Courtney. He had to go to another break but he heard that Staind was performing their version of The Beetlejuice song so he cut to that instead. They were in the middle of the song when he cut to them. They finished up that song and performed another song for the crowd.
Howard's girlfriend Beth was there and told Howard that the weather was actually very warm out there. She said she might even have something to say to the crowd if she's in the mood later on. Howard said that he couldn't even sleep in the same room with Beth last night because she had to take care of their dog who has been waking them up lately. Beth told the guys that she heard Tabitha Stevens on the Meet the Shrink show last night. Tabitha was there so Howard brought her in quickly to talk about the show. Tabitha said that she came very close to crying last night on the show. She was talking about her family hating her and how she's had too much plastic surgery. Howard had to cut the interview with Tabitha short so he could take a break.
After the break Fred played Green Day's ''Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)'' performance that they did on the show years ago. Howard said that they did have the time of their lives doing that show after listening to that song. He quickly moved on to play some more of the goodbye speeches. Riley Martin, friend to the aliens, went up and made a nice speech about Howard moving to extra-terrestrial radio. Riley said that the mother ship was out there listening to what Howard had to say on the air. He ended his speech by calling the crowd ''stupid mother f'ers.''
Howard said that he was out yelling at Scott the Engineer about getting a mic on the crowd because they couldn't hear them. Sour Shoes was on the phone a short time later so Howard let him sing a couple of songs and talk about how crazy things were out there on 6th Ave. He couldn't even get in close to the stage they had set up.
Howard played High Pitch Eric's goodbye speech which wasn't a speech at all. He reenacted a moment from his ''craptacular'' show on Howard 100. Eric then went on to thank some of the people on the show for helping him out. Artie said ''What a bore!'' after hearing the speech.
Howard had Will come in to let them know what was going on with the $10,000 they were giving away. Will said they gave that away and they had the guy they picked to have sex with Courtney Cums. Howard said the guy looked like he could get dates. He tried to speak to the guy but the microphone wasn't working. The guy eventually got on mic and said that he's from California. He said hello to Courtney and said he would be interested in going on the ''date'' with Courtney. Artie told the guy to ''give it to her'' in honor of the show. Courtney said the guy wasn't bad looking at all and she was looking forward to the date. Howard let the guy go and played some more goodbye speeches.
Daniel Carver made a speech about Howard but the crowd was yelling at him. He laughed after saying that there were too many ''Nig***s'' out there in the crowd. Then he started to go off on one of his racist rants instead of saying goodbye to Howard. He was cut off and then King of All Blacks went up and said a few words. He was pretty lit so he was goofing around with Daniel Carver and laughing his ass off. Next up was Wendy the Retard and Gary the Retard. Gary the Retard was yelling at the crowd off mic while Wendy tried to read her poem. He told the crowd to shut up so she could read the poem. Wendy read the speech she had prepared and thanked everyone on the show while the crowd was yelling at Gary.
Howard played a clip of John the Stutterer's goodbye speech. When he was introduced the crowd were all saying ''I, I, I'' trying to get him to stutter. John was barely able to get a word out because of the way they were yelling at him. Someone was yelling ''Homo'' over and over again at him. Howard wondered why John would write a long speech but Robin told him it wasn't long, John just couldn't get it out.
Tom Chiusano was out on stage live so Howard cut away to him. He heard that Tom was getting booed but when he cut away, Tom was making a nice speech. You could hear the crowd yelling at Tom to ''Give Howard His Tapes!'' over and over again. Tom thanked Howard and the crew, the advertisers and many other people. He said he's really going to miss this as a woman was flashing him. He ended the speech with ''Nice breasts!''
Howard said it figures that on their last day they can't hear the crowd chanting. Ralph came in and said that he can't believe that they can't hear the crowd because it's crazy out there. He also said that the day is turning out to be great because the sun was starting to come out.
Scott the Engineer was on stage making his quick speech. He said he was looking forward to another 20 years but Howard said he's not sure why he hired him because he can't even mic the crowd right. Benjy went up after that and made a strange speech about how Howard will live on and people must follow them to the new place. He got the crowd going a little bit but there really wasn't a good reason to have him up there.
Howard asked Victoria to get naked for them before she left. She quickly stripped down for them but wanted to play a game before letting them play Butt Bongo on her ass. Artie was the lucky guy to go over there to play the bongos on Victoria's ass as Fred played the Baker Street Baba Booey song. Artie was just smacking her ass and not playing along with the song. Howard had to go to break after a few seconds of that.
After the break we heard some more classic moments from the show as some of the guys were going down to the street to make their speeches. High Pitch Eric being chased by a fish and Dave Grohl performing ''Everlong'' live in the studio were played before Howard cut in and let everyone hear Artie making his speech. Artie was talking about how drunk he was and how great The Howard Stern Show is. He was talking about all of the people that they're celebrating. He even offered $50 to the first person who hands him a Vikodin this morning. He said he was going to bring the crowd to a special screening of ''Brokeback Mountain.'' He then got serious and said that his father turned him onto Howard's show and wished that he was still alive to hear him on the show. The crowd then cheered Artie's name as he walked off stage.
Next up on stage was Gary ''Baba Booey'' Dell'Abate. He thanked everyone on the show and all of the audience for supporting them. He talked about the names he's been called over the years and how he's taken all of them as compliments. He said that he may be older, grayer and fatter, but his teeth have stayed the same. He then broke into a song parody about his teeth. The crowd then started to sing the Star Wars Baba Booey song parody as he was leaving the stage.
Fred left the studio next to go make his speech. Howard said a few nice words to Robin about having his back over the years. He told her to spread her legs so they could get going but she wasn't going there. Fred was finally down at the stage so Howard listened in as he made his speech. Fred said that it pains him to know that the audience knows some of his deepest, darkest secrets. He talked about his name change, the Cookie Puss story and a few other classic moments. He then said that he really does feel that he's the luckiest man on earth because of the people he works with... like Howard Stern. He said that Howard saw something in him that no one else could see and he's been a friend ever since. He also said some nice words about the other people he works with like Gary and Artie. He didn't have much of anything to say about Benjy though. Fred also said that he wasn't there to say goodbye, he was there to say thank you to everyone who has been a fan of the show.
Howard broke in and said that he had to head down to the stage to make his speech. He thanked everyone who wasn't able to make it down there today for listening to the show over the years. He said he didn't know what people expected from the show but this is the way it's ending. He said he wanted to go have some fun with the fans who did show up out there. Ralph said that even Tom was getting into the whole thing because he put on one of the arm bands that they were handing out down there on the street... with the new Howard Stern on SIRIUS fist logo on it.
As Howard left the air, Robin started to make her speech. Robin said that the show wouldn't have lasted for 20 years without each and every one of the people in that crowd out there today. She said that she was very appreciative of the fans and they couldn't ask for anyone better. She said that everyone was waiting to hear what Howard had to say. She said something a couple of times that got the delay hit. She may have mentioned the SIRIUS name. Robin said that there's nothing wrong with what they do on the show and the fun will continue when they move to the new place. She said she loved everyone there and thanked them as she left the stage.
At around 9:35 in the morning Howard was brought up on stage to make his final terrestrial radio speech. They brought him up to his movie soundtrack song ''American Nightmare.'' He got a few ''Hey Now''s from the crowd and started to make his speech. He said that he loves the crowd and asked them if any of them work anymore. The crowd all said ''No!''
Howard made his speech but the delay was hit a few times. People in the crowd may have been cursing. He went on to talk about the past 20 years and how they've done it all. He talked about an article he read where they said he was the last of a dying breed because the religious right is taking over the airwaves. Howard said he's not going to bow down to that though, he's leaving FM radio so he can once again be free to do the broadcast he wants to do.
Howard said that the fans out there today were the real last of a dying breed because he doesn't think there will ever be another radio show like this or another audience like that. He said congratulations to them and told them that they're all a part of history today. He thanked everyone for being in his corner for all of these years and talked about how the support of the fans have allowed him to make his show what it's become today. He said that they've stood their ground over the years even after all of the things that have happened with fines and stuff like that.
Howard reminded the crowd about some of the things that have gone on with the show over the years where they battled other radio guys and beat them down. He brought up the ''dying breed'' thing a few times and thanked the crowd multiple times for being there for him. He brought up a few more things that happened on the show over the years and how there's no way that this radio show will ever be duplicated.
Howard went through many of the great moments from the show but there were still multiple delay button hits. It may have been the cursing coming from the crowd though. He thanked the crowd one more time for the past 20 years of shows and talked about how the ride isn't over yet, it's just beginning. Five more years of Howard Stern... uncensored. He said they'll never bow to the government, the FCC or the religious right.
Howard told the crowd that he's beat the government at their own game and that's what they'll show when they move to satellite. He pointed out that many of the crowd were wearing his new fist logo and he wanted to take that fist and shove it up Clear Channel. As he was talking about that the delay was hit a few more times.
Howard thanked his fans for coming out to his book signings over the years. He thanked them for the support they gave him over the years for his channel 9 show, his movie, his books, his CDs and video tapes too. He thanked his family for putting up with his career. He talked about his three children and how they had to put up with a lot. He thanked his parents and his girlfriend too. Howard said that he's very lucky to have the fans that he does and then asked Infinity Broadcasting to let him have his tapes.
Howard thanked Gary, Fred, Artie and Robin for being there for him as well. Scott the Engineer also got a thank you even though he screws up things for him. He thanked Sal, Richard, JD, Ronnie, Tom Chiusano and others. The delay was hit a couple more times during that speech. He thanked Cabbie for his revelations over the years and thanked Hank the Dwarf for what he did on the show.
Howard thanked the cast of ''Private Parts,'' the many comedians who have been on the show like Jim Florentine, Rev. Bob Levy and others. He thanked the board ops who worked on his show for years, the E! crew, all of the strippers, Zolar, Joey Boots, High Pitch Eric, Al Rosenberg, Hook Nose Mike, Debbie the Queefer, Rocky the Crack Whore, Bobo, Kenneth Keith Kallenbach, Clif Pallete, Jeff the Drunk, Double A, Mariann from Brooklyn, George Takei, Shuli and others. He tried to thank as many people as he could remember. There were many people standing in the crowd that he thanked. He also thanked the New York City cops who were there this morning keeping the crowd under control.
Howard said he was dedicating this last show to Sgt. Keith Manning who is in the military over in Iraq. He said that he's another one of the Dying Breed. Howard said a few more thanks to the fans who have kept him going every day. He's going to keep entertaining people every day when he makes his move. He gave a final F-Jackie and thanked the crowd one last time as they ended the show at about 10:00am. The crowd chanted Howard's name as they played him out with ''Tortured Man'' from the ''Private Parts'' soundtrack.
Check out Yahoo! for more coverage from New York City. UPDATED 1:50PM - Yahoo! did a great job covering the after party. Their video feed was just about flawless the whole time I was watching it. The footage should be archived and available to watch throughout the day.
Howard 100 on SIRIUS is also doing all day coverage so you might want to check that out if you have your SIRIUS tuner.
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