Howard had a few clips of tape that he played from the awards. He played some tape of Angelina Jolie talking about how much she loves her brother and Howard was fascinated by that. He says he wants to get her on the show immediately to talk to her about it.
Robin asked Howard who he thought was dressed the best. Howard was in such a drunken haze that night that he didn't really have an answer. Stuttering John came in and said that Faith Hill looked great as well as Charlize Theron.
Howard was noticing how most of the Wall Street Journal predictions were coming true during the awards and when Ralph decided to bet against Denzel Washington with Howard, he took the bet. He figured that the predictions were all coming true so he thought he had a sure thing. Howard upped the bet from $10 to $100 and lost when Kevin Spacey won the award. Howard said he was glad Denzel lost the award though because he's such a prick for going around saying that he should get the award just because he's black.
Howard also took the chance to bash Sweden while the girls were there. He told them how Sweden wasn't ''neutral'' during World War II like they said they were. They supplied iron ore to the Nazi's during the war so Howard went off on what pussies all of the men over there are.
The team has a callender available and that can be found at their web site SwedishBikiniTeam.net. He also learned that the girls get paid about $30 a day for the work they do. Just before they left KC came in and asked if they wanted to get naked for money but they don't do that. Howard didn't even attempt to try and get them out of their bikinis.
As soon as Andy came in Howard told him that Angelina Jolie has made Andy look normal after her odd speech last night at the Academy Awards. He said that Andy looks normal next to her. Andy spent a couple of minutes talking about what he does on this tour. He talks about his drug abuse and does some strange things. He has one guy fake vomit on him at one point. Howard heard that he shaves his ass on stage also but that turns out to be a different show. Andy told Howard that he doesn't shave his own ass, he shaves a volunteer's ass during his own show.
Howard also brought up Andy's sexual history and how he was molested as a child. Andy told Howard that he wasn't molested but his childhood was very hazy. Howard thought he remembered a story about Andy being molested by a childhood friend. Andy had to straighten out the story by telling Howard that he wasn't molested. He and a friend were ''experimenting'' sexually and it was the first orgasm he'd ever experienced.
Howard also mentioned that Chris Farley was Andy's sponsor when he was fighting his drug addiction. Andy said that Farley had been sober for 3 years but fell off the wagon and died 3 months after that. Andy said that he's now 10 months sober himself. He said he has to be sober because he's on probation for 3 years for some accident he had. He didn't get into detail about the accident though.
The subject of Saturday Night Live's Chris Kattan came up also. Kattan does an impression of Andy that Andy doesn't like. He wrote a song about him and performed what was supposed to be a ''clean'' version of it for Howard. It wasn't clean and Howard had to hit the delay a bunch of times. Andy also made some comments about Kattan that could be libelous so Howard had to straighten Andy out about that stuff. Andy said it was all a joke.
Howard took a bunch of phone calls for Andy and a few of them were angry people who called him a ''fag'' among other names. Andy got upset and by the end of the interview he was saying that he doesn't feel safe on the show anymore and this might be his last appearance. There were some positive phone calls thrown in with the bad ones but Andy didn't pay much attention to them. He obsessed over the bad calls and it upset him.. like a little girl.
Howard let Andy perform one last song before he left but he ended up cutting him off before he was done. Andy sang about all of the TV shows that goof on him. Howard cut him off and Andy said he wasn't finished.. Howard said ''Yes you are..'' and took a few more phone calls. He took a bunch of positive calls and Andy was still depressed about the appearance. Someone said that Andy will probably commit suicide in the next few days. He'd probably blame it on this appearance.
Later in the show Howard played tape of Andy trying to cut an ID for the show. Andy started to read it but he didn't like what he was reading. He said that he was really depressed after the interview and that Howard brought him down. So he really wasn't kidding about all of the phone calls Howard took. Maybe this was really his last appearance.
The best story Kim had to tell was about her junior high school track coach who wrote her a love letter. She was only 14 at the time when this coach came on to her. She still has the letter to this day. Howard read a few bits of it. The coach wrote things like ''You are beautiful..'', ''..your body drives me crazy..'', ''..if I could marry you today I would..'' and ''I love you.'' Kim said that she was kind of showing off the letter to people and her father ended up finding the letter. Kim said that soon after that the principal was called and the coach was fired. The coach wanted her to avoid getting serious with anyone else so that she could be with him when she graduated. Kim got married at the age of 19 but not to the coach. She told Howard that she was a virgin when she got married and she's still with the same guy.
Howard eventually got around to talking to Roland also. Roland is a huge body builder from Austria. He said that he has trained with Arnold Schwarzenegger and was his body double in some movie he did. Roland said he used to be a 145 pound weakling but after 17 years of working out he now weighs 250 pounds. He said he was up around 300 pounds but dropped 50 for the show.
Howard said that even Roland has been offered acting jobs if he would have sex with people from movie productions. Roland said that's only happened on non-union movies and it hasn't happened a lot. Roland plugged a fitness tape that he has out called ''Ultimate Results'' that's available at Kickinger.com.
Howard took a few phone calls for Kim and Roland and one guy pointed out how prominent Kim's nipples are in her scenes. Kim complained that her bathing suit doesn't have any padding in it while the other's do. She said that she's going to start putting band-aid's on them from now on. Howard jokingly warned her not to or else she'd get fired. Robin said she thought that those nipples were a prop that was put in her bathing suit but it turns out they're hers.
After the interview Howard took a call from someone who runs SonOfTheBeachETV.com which is a fan site that does reviews of each week's shows. They also have a chat room and other stuff about the show. Howard said he checked it out himself.
Howard also told Robin that he was at some art show yesterday looking at Japanese art that he was very impressed by. He said some of it dates back to 200 A.D. He said that he may have to sign another radio contract next year just to pay for the stuff he wants to buy.
Howard ran into Jerry Seinfeld somewhere in New York City yesterday. Howard said that Jerry was pretty funny when he was talking to him about his new house. Seinfeld just bought Billy Joel's old house out on Long Island for something like $30 Million. Howard congratulated him on the purchase and Seinfeld jokingly said that he got a good deal on it. That led to a discussion about the Hamptons and all of the people who vacation there. Howard and the crew all talked about what it would be like to be stuck in the 3 hour traffic getting out to the Hamptons and if it's worth it or not. Howard said he'd like to go to some of the parties out there. Gary told him he's got a friend who has a house out there that Howard could stay at this summer. Howard said he might check that out.
Howard got a letter from this 32 year old woman Joy who said she wants to meet the Backstreet Boys when they come on the show in the near future. She doesn't know what to do to get on so Howard made some suggestions. She told Howard in the e-mail that she's not very attractive and he probably wouldn't want to see her naked. Howard suggested that she get in a diaper and bra in front of the guys but she refused to do it. After talking to her for a few minutes Howard gave up and told her she lost out on her chance. He told her that she could think about it and get back to him but she sounded pretty set in her ways.
It didn't take long for Howard and Robin to bring up what Ozzy is worth. They read an article the other day that said he's only worth about $48 million. He's obviously made a lot more than that so Howard and Robin wondered where it all went. Ozzy says his family spends it all as it comes in. Sharon said something about that $48 Million being just what they claimed on their income tax. She denied hiding money though.
Howard also spoke to Jack about being Ozzy's son. Jack was on the show a few years ago but now he's 14 and his voice is changing. He told Howard that he doesn't get many chicks at this point in his life because he only has 52 kids in his class and they all find him to be ''weird''. Ozzy's proud that Jack is ''a chip off the old block'' being weird and all.
Ozzy told Howard a story about how there are always kids coming around his house to visit his kids. One day Ozzy was watching TV and the doorbell rang. He got up and answered it thinking it was just a few of the kids friends. He opened the door and told the kids where his kids were. It turned out to be a tour bus group that showed up on his doorstep. The next thing he knew there were 18 people walking all over his house while he was in his Jockey shorts scratching his ass.
Howard also heard that Ozzy has Pat Boone as a neighbor and that they throw dog crap on his lawn. Ozzy says he doesn't do it himself but once got a Pat Boone album with a thank you note saying ''thanks for the fertilizer''. Sharon said that her daughter once pulled Pat's phone number out of the phone book and called up his house. Pat answered the phone ''Hello, Pat Boone's office'' and the daughter said to him ''Liar, this is your house'' and hung up on him. What a fun family!
Ozzy and Howard discussed how his family uses up his money and how he's stuck with them all the time now. He said that they even go on tour with him now. Ozzy and his wife take one tour bus while the kids get their own. Ozzy said that he doesn't like having the family with him but he's got no choice.
We also learned that Ozzy is still the kid in the family. Jack actually turns into a father figure and has to lecture Ozzy on some of the stuff he does. Sharon also has to control Ozzy because he's so irresponsible. Ozzy says he sometimes feels like a slave because he's the one going out and making all of the money while his family spends it all.
When Howard asked Ozzy about the tour it was Jack who knew the lineup for the bands. He rattled off a bunch of bands that will be playing in the Ozzfest tour including Ozzy, Pantera, Godsmack, Static X, Incubus and a bunch of others.
Before Ozzy left Howard brought in Alexis who wrote a letter to Howard saying that she wanted to meet Ozzy because he's her god. She came in and started crying because she was so thrilled to meet her god. Howard noticed her huge breast implants right away. Alexis told Ozzy that she has learned a lot of valuable lessons from his music. She said she lost her mother as a child and his song ''Goodbye to Romance'' taught her to keep going even when she's down. She even said that she has imaginary conversations with Ozzy. When she has a crisis she'll question Ozzy, in her mind, as to what she should do. She'll go with what she thinks Ozzy would tell her to do. Both Ozzy and Jack gave Alexis a hug before she left. Howard asked her if she'd have sex with 14 year old Jack but she said that would be wrong.
The Goo Goo Dolls album ''Dizzy Up The Girl'' has done pretty well for the band selling 3 million copies since it came out in 1998. They've had a bunch of hits off the album including ''Slide'', ''Iris'', and ''Black Balloon''. Howard said that their music seems to fit in a lot of different formats so it get's played on a lot of different stations. The guys said that fact has led to some bizarre concert double bills. They said that they opened up for KoRn one time and had shoes thrown at them and shortly after that they opened up for '''N Sync'' and had smaller shoes thrown at them. They also opened up for Lenny Kravitz down in South Africa and had a bottle of urine thrown at them. They said that whole South Africa thing was a strange experience. They said that everyone down there is on the drug Ecstasy.
Lead singer John said that he's in the process of getting a divorce from his wife of 6 years. He told Howard that she's still his best friend and he's not just saying that. He said that their relationship just became like a brother/sister thing.
Howard played a couple of clips of their hit songs and said that not all of their music is ballads. They said that a lot of their songs are much harder rock songs but no one knows that. John said that sometimes the people who come to see their concerts are a little confused when they hear their harder songs. They don't mind that their ballads become hits though. As long as their music is being heard, they don't mind.
Howard had the guys perform ''Slide'' which sounded pretty good. After the song he spoke to them about the plane crash they survived. The guys told Howard how the DC-9 Navy jet they were being flown around in went through a nasty thunderstorm and they had to make an emergency landing. John said that the pilot tried to land 3 times unsuccessfully and the plane ran out of fuel. The plane ended up slamming into the ground. The landing gear broke off and the wings were ripped open. No one was killed and the guys have become more religious since the crash.
The guys were promoting their new single ''Broadway'' which was just released. Howard played a bit of it before the guys left.
Al also questioned Howard about whether or not he's going to leave radio when his contract is up. Howard said that he has a few months (9) left on his current contract and he's not sure he wants to sign up for 5 more. He said he still enjoys doing the show but there are some things that he doesn't like about it. Getting up at 4am and Tom Chiusano were two of the things he doesn't like about the job. He's been talking to his psychiatrist about the subject but he doesn't have an answer yet. He said that he has to make up his mind in the next couple of weeks. He said he wouldn't mind signing up for another year or so but the company will probably want him to commit to 5.
Howard brought up this letter he got from a 29 year old woman who wants to meet the Backstreet Boys when they come in. Howard can't believe that a 29 year old would write a letter to him asking him to meet those guys. She pretty much begged him to let her come down to the studio. He got her on the phone to find out a little more about her. She's really into them and wants to meet them really bad. Howard ended up talking to her husband and he said that he's even sickened by the whole thing. Howard eventually broke down and said that she can come in when they come down. He just wants to meet the type of person who would want to meet those guys.
Last week Howard played some of Jeff Bridges awful album ''Be Here Soon''. Today he brought it up again because there's a review in People magazine that says the album is good. He couldn't believe that this guy wrote that Jeff's singing is like Van Morrison. He compared the two and they sound nothing alike. Jeff's singing just plain sucks.
A listener called in and told Howard about how he was molested as a young boy. He said that he heard Howard say something about how kids who are molested usually grow up to be pretty messed up. That motivated him to get his life together and get a job. Howard had the guy tell his molestation story after he guessed that it might have something to do with the Catholic church. The guy said that it was a Catholic Big Brother who molested him when he was about 11. He told Howard that the guy met him at some event where the kids were getting toys and he got a battleship model from this guy. The guy would have the kid over to his house to sleep over and would molest them as they were going to bed. The guy said that this went on for about 2 and a half months until the guy was arrested.
Stuttering John kept telling Bobo that the thing looks like a hat and you can see him coming from 40 feet away. Even Gary said that when he met him at an appearance he couldn't concentrate on the conversation because the wig had him mesmerized.
Howard asked the other two guys who they were also. They both had bad hair but it was their own. Both of them were named Anthony. One guy is a film maker and the other guy owns a restaurant by the name of ''Three Of Cups''.
Bobo told Howard that he's a defensive driving instructor for the US Postal service. Howard asked him if he makes his students keep their windows up so his wig won't fly off. He also asked if people ever accidentally call him ''Baldo'' instead of Bobo. Bobo says that a lot of people don't know it's a wig on his head. He said he fooled Sam the chick who was on before him. She guessed that it was one of the other guys who had the fake hair.
Bobo also discussed his recent divorce and how he was cleaned out. His wife didn't like Howard so they didn't get along too well. He now has to pay over $1300 a month in child support. He was telling Howard that his wife cleaned him out but it turns out she hardly got anything out of the divorce. Bobo said she settled for a lump sum payment of $3000 instead of taking $400 a month. Howard couldn't believe what he was hearing and said that he should have spoken to Bobo's lawyer when he was getting separated from his wife. Bobo's wife is still living in their home though so he has to live in an apartment. The home will be sold in 2 years and they'll split the money they get out of that.
The White Rapper, another Extreme Fan, called in saying that he's a bigger fan than Bobo is. He wanted to challenge Bobo to a trivia contest. He asked ''Who gave Howard the nick name Moldred back in the 80's?'' What he meant to ask was who gave Howard the name Moldred to use for his daughter that was yet to be born. Bobo wasn't sure of the answer but while he was thinking about it the White Rapper was being yelled at by his wife. Howard eventually gave the correct answer of Frank Zappa. The White Rapper eventually asked another question but his wife ended up hanging up the phone before he could give the correct answer. So much for the trivia contest. Howard gave Bobo some tickets to the Rain Forest concert as a prize for coming in.
Howard took a call from a cop down in the Philadelphia area who said that Kenneth Keith Kallenbach is in jail for moving his bowels out on a street somewhere. He was also drunk when he did it.
Howard mentioned that in an article Sandra Bullock said that if she were to go on ''Who Wants to be a Millionaire'' she'd like to have Howard as one of her lifelines.
Another article Howard read said that Jackie was at some Les Paul concert and Les had him come up on stage to tell a joke. When he stayed up too long Keith Richards from the Rolling Stones heckled Jackie to get him off the stage.
Howard played tape of CBS news dude Tony Pagnatti talking about how great ''Son of the Beach'' is and how proud he is of his college ''buddy''. Howard said they weren't exactly buddies in college but they were there at the same time.
Howard took a phone call from a guy who asked about the recent articles about Howard being in love with Robin Givens. Howard said that the article was written because he's been seen with her. He admitted that he has hung out with Robin as a friend but he's not dating her.
|Product||Howard's Guess||Robin's Guess||Actual Price|
|Iceberg Lettuce||$1.39||No guess||$1.69|
|One dozen eggs||$2.69||$1.00||$1.99|
|One gallon of milk||$2.69||$2.50||$3.45|
|3 Pack of condoms||$1.59||$3.00||$2.19|
|Loaf of white bread||$2.17||No guess||$1.59|
|1 Can of tuna||$3.99||$1.69||$1.29|
After learning about her Howard decided to do the baloney toss. He had her get topless and said her boobies were nice. They're an average B-cup and Gary said she shouldn't ruin them with implants. She said that if Howard wanted to give them to her she's like to have them. That didn't happen though. Howard proceeded to smear tons of mayo on her nude chest. He said that she was getting excited as he was smearing it on. After plastering her with the mayo he and Jackie tossed baloney on her as she attempted to sing her own version of ''My Funny Valentine''. She couldn't read her lyrics very well so she only got out a few lines of the song. KC was laughing hysterically the whole time as they filled her chest up with baloney. After it was all tossed Carolyn turned around and showed Robin. Robin said her whole chest was covered with baloney. Howard told Carolyn they'd give her some kind of prize for coming down and doing this.
Howard got to Mike Walker at one point and spoke to him for a minute. Mike has been fishing around for info on some of the stories that have been printed lately about Howard. Gary said that Mike was asking him if any of them were true. Gary said he gave a ''no comment'' to him. Mike says Howard has become a magnet for stories since his legal separation. We also learned that Audrey is 22 years old at this point. A short time later Wood Yi says ''Twenty two? I have ball cheese older than twenty two!'' Howard had Mike get to the game so they could get it out of the way. Each week Mike Walker calls in with four gossip stories. Three of the stories are from his National Enquirer gossip column. One of the stories is false. Everyone tries to pick out the false story. Here are this week's stories:
After the game Howard spent more time talking to Audrey and her boyfriend. Audrey told Howard that she started modeling at 18 but could have started earlier. Her father wouldn't let her do it any earlier though. She said that her father is very strict and she wasn't even allowed to speak english in her house.
Audrey told Howard a story about how Jack Nicholson hit on her and her friend a few years ago. She said she and a friend were at the Monkey Bar and Jack asked the two of them back to his home. Being a naive girl Audrey went there not expecting Jack to ask for sex. Jack went on to drink a bunch of alcohol and her friend asked him why he was drinking so much. He said something about drinking a lot when he thinks he's going to get two women in bed. The girls then left. Audrey said he was a nice guy and didn't try to keep them there or anything.
Howard then learned that Audrey has a boyfriend now and she's been dating him for 4 years. Howard brought the guy in the studio and interviewed the two of them for a while. The boyfriend is the manager of a band. He told Howard that the two of them met at some party and became friends for a few years before hooking up. Before Audrey left Wood Yi threw in a ''Can I smell your Pu Pu Platter?''. Audrey will be the upcoming movie ''Autumn in New York'' with Richard Gere.
Ed says he has accepted the fact that he's gay and still performs oral on guys. There were a lot of delay hits during the conversation so we missed a lot of what he was saying. You can find out more about the book at 1stBooks.com