-- Monday September 6, 1999 --
- The Best Of Stern. 9/6/99.
Howard was off today for Labor Day. He will return tomorrow live. Here's some of what we heard today:
- ''The Psycho Friends Network'' commercial parody
- ''The Homeless Brady Bunch'' TV show parody
- Gary explains his job and the tape he made to his ex-girlfriend
- Howard talks about how Christy Brinkley was called a hero after crashing on a mountain on her way to ''heli-ski''
- Robin talks about getting robbed at a restaurant
- A woman on valium calls in and rambles while Howard goofs on her
- Howard talks to David Koresh's mother and brother about their book
- Howard reprimands Stuttering John for asking him to appear in his music video
- Howard reads an article about Jackie's many homes
- Howard yelled at Mike Gange for dubbing a tape incorrectly
- Howard yells at Gary for letting Stuttering John open his personal mail
- The Goo Goo Dolls perform live at the Gay Dance Party
- Stuttering John interviews Danny Glover, Bill Cosby, Garth Brooks
- Stuttering John tells Howard about kissing Robin
- ''Mayberry KKK'' TV show parody
-- Tuesday September 7, 1999 --
- Jackie's Death Pool Win Discussed. 9/7/99. 6:05am
Someone finally won the year old Death Pool that Howard and the gang started. Yesterday it was announced that Alan Funt died at the age of 84. Jackie was lucky enough to have Funt in his list of names so he won $2500 this morning. No one was happy to give up their $500 to Jackie but they'll do it. Howard was wondering how they'll keep the death pool running and finally decided that they'll just keep the same names and throw in another $500. Gary was thinking that they should pick all new names but Howard said he didn't want to bore the audience with a 20 minute discussion about it so they're sticking with the same names.
- Marco The Roberto Begnini Impersonator. 9/7/99. 6:45am
This guy showed up at Howard's radio station this morning. Howard has heard about the guy and that he goes around impersonating Italian actor Roberto Begnini. Howard said he'd give the guy 5 minutes but once the guy was in he wouldn't leave. Howard tried to interview him but he was so annoying that he gave up on it. The guy said that he doesn't go around impersonating Begnini but Howard heard that's not the truth. Howard heard that he recently got in trouble for doing it. The guy had a body guard and an interpreter but they didn't help things out. When they tried to kick the guy out the body guard tried to keep Gary away from him. Howard said the guy was scary and started coming toward him at one point. After about 15 minutes they got him out of the studio. Howard wasn't sure what the guy was even doing there. Apparently Doug Goodstein from E! had met Marco somewhere and the guy wouldn't deny impersonating Begnini.
- Howard Discusses The Jerry Lewis Telethon. 9/7/99. 6:50am
Howard spent some time this morning talking about the Jerry Lewis telethon that went on this weekend. Howard had some clips that he played from the awful thing including Jerry singing Al Jolson's ''Mammy'' song. Jackie said he heard that Jerry was in a wheelchair by the end of the telethon but no one could confirm that.
- Howard Gives Away Tickets To The MTV Video Music Awards. 9/7/99. 7:50am
Earlier in the morning Howard said that he had a pair of tickets to the MTV Video Music Awards show that he could give away. An African guy called in and just about begged Howard for the tickets. Howard said that he wasn't going to do it at that time but after spending a few minutes quizzing the guy about living in Africa he decided to play a game with him. KC came in with a few true/false questions about Presidents in the United States taken from the book ''Sex Lives of the Presidents.'' The guy only got one question correct but Howard let him have the tickets anyway. The questions were:
- George Washington died in a unheated shack, in the middle of winter, with a 16 year old black girl - True
- President James Buchannan was rumored to be a homo - True
- Abe Lincoln used the money from the winnings of a log splitting contest to buy a prostitute - False
The guy called himself Charles but Howard found out his ''African name'' was Kinki.
- Fred Daniels From The Fred Society Calls In. 9/7/99. 9:00am
The founder of ''The Fred Society'' called in this morning to promote his club. Howard said that Fred was puzzled as to why Fred Norris changed his name to Eric a few years back. Eric wasn't happy with his name and had it legally changed to Eric Fred Norris back in 1994 or so. Fred Daniels said that his ''Fred Society'' has 4000 members and it's done to keep the name Fred alive. He said it's all done tongue-in-cheek. In other words, it's not all that serious. Daniels said that the name Fred roughly translates from it's German roots to ''Peaceful Ruler.'' He said he was disappointed when he found out Fred Norris changed his name but he's a little too late to do anything about it. He wished that he could have intervened before he changed his name. Daniels said that it costs $24.95 a year to join the society. Even women with names like Winifred or Frederique can join. You can check them out at www.fredsociety.com.
- Howard Gives Away More Tickets. 9/7/99. 9:15am
Howard had a trip to Planet Hollywood to give away today. A listener called in and said he was pissed that the guy won the VMA tickets earlier in the morning. He called the guy some names and said that he should have won the tickets instead. Howard said that he'd let him try for the trip to Planet Hollywood. The tickets were tied in with the release of ''The Arnold Schwarzenegger Collection'' including four films: "Commando", "Predator", "The Running Man" and "Total Recall". KC came in with some true/false questions about Sean Connery which were taken from the book ''Hollywood Confidential.'' Here's what he asked:
- Sean Connery is known as a terrible tipper - True
- Sean has a tattoo on his arm that reads ''Mum & Dad'' - True
- Sean Connery's hobbies include whittling - False
The guy didn't get 2 out of 3 correct but Howard decided to give him one more chance. KC gave the guy a Presidential true/false question from the book ''Sex Lives of the Presidents.'' The question was:
- ''Warren Harding had sex with a 16 year old - True''
The caller got it correct so he won the trip to Planet Hollywood. KC had one other question that he told Howard. It was:
- ''John Kennedy lost his virginity to a prostitute - True''
Howard couldn't believe that was true and he kicked KC out of the studio.
-- Wednesday September 8, 1999 (Replayed on Master Tape Theatre on Sunday, November 17, 2013) --
- Gary's Cop Story. 9/8/99. 6:35am
Gary got pulled over by a cop this morning so Howard had him tell the story because it sounded kind of odd to him. Gary was on his way into work when he noticed a cop on the road up ahead. He was doing about 65 in a 55 zone so he slowed down as he approached the cop. He stayed behind the cop going slower and slower until the cop slowed down and got behind him. Then the cop pulled him over. Gary didn't know why he was being pulled over so the cop told him he was in a construction zone and the speed limit is actually 45. The whole time other cars were whipping by him doing 55-65 mph. The cop gave him a lecture but didn't give him a ticket. Both Gary and his neighbor, who was also in the car, were clueless as to why they'd been pulled over. Howard thought it was unusual and doesn't know why the cop pulled them over. One listener called in and said that the cop may have thought he was acting suspicious by slowing down so much.
- Dr. Alter The Labia Doctor. 9/8/99. 7:05am
Dr. Alter called in to talk about how he does cosmetic surgery on women's labia minora. He told Howard that some women are self conscious about how they look down there so he does plastic surgery to minimize the size of the inner lips of women's private parts. He said that it's unlike most operations where the doctors amputate the labia minora. He just makes them smaller. Although Dr. Alter has never performed this operation on his girlfriend he has done other plastic surgery on them. Dr. Calabro called in at one point and said he's seen this done and it's part of a 3 part surgery where a woman's clitoris is de-hooded. Dr. Alter said he doesn't do that and his operation is a one step process. He promoted his web site AlterMD.com before ending the segment. You can also reach him at (310) 275-5566.
- Jen's Non-C-Cup Breasts. 9/8/99. 7:20am
Last Friday this 33 year old woman Jennifer called in and told Howard she wanted to come in to have her breast cup size measured. She said that her friends disagreed with her when she said she has a c-cup. She came in and Howard sized her up. She was 5'2'' tall, 105 pounds and 33 years old. She was wearing a sweater and pants. Howard's incompetent crew had some bras for Jennifer to try on but they only had B,C and D cup sizes. They didn't get any A-cups. As soon as Howard saw Jennifer's breasts he knew she wasn't a C-cup. He immediately said that she's no more than an A-cup. Howard had her try on a C-cup, then a B and she was ''swimming'' in each one. Howard said she was cute and her breasts looked fine but they're not anywhere near a C-cup. Dr. R. Scott Smith called Howard and told him how he could do a quick measurement to see what cup size she actually is. He had Howard measure Jennifer under her arms and above her breasts. He came up with 31 inches. Dr. Smith then told Howard to measure her where her breasts protrude the most. He came up with 31½ inches. Dr. Smith said ''She has an A-cup Howard..'' Jennifer is still saying she doesn't believe it. Jennifer's friend was also there and she said that she knows Jennifer doesn't have a C-cup. Howard eventually got her to take her top off also. She had a ''full B-cup'' but Howard didn't comment on how good or bad she looked. After Jennifer left Gary said she was pissed.
- The Jennifer Capriatti Crying Tapes. 9/8/99. 8:05am
Yesterday Howard was trying to get a hold of tape where tennis player Jennifer Capriatti cries at a press conference. Today he finally had the tape so he played it for everyone to enjoy. During the press conference Jennifer was telling the press that she was no longer going to talk about her past. She didn't say exactly what it was about her past she didn't want to talk about so the reporters started asking her what they could talk to her about. After a few questions poor Jennifer broke down and cried for about 30 seconds before someone pulled her out of the room. Howard said he thinks both Jennifer and the reporters should be locked up.
- KC Gets Reamed For Screwing Up Howard's Breakfast. 9/8/99. 8:35am
KC screwed up Howard's breakfast for the last time.. maybe. Howard has been dealing with KC screwing up getting his breakfast since the day he started. Today Howard finally went nuts and had to yell at him for it. Howard said he never brings in the food on time. He brings it in near the end of a commercial break and he forgets stuff. Today he forgot Howard's raisins and it drove him over the edge. KC said he's overwhelmed sometimes and today was one of those days. Howard said that he's going to have to relieve him of his food duties. Howard took a call from ex-intern Melissa who said she'd be willing to do it. Howard said that he just lost his assistant Jodi to Calista Flockhart so he may hire Melissa to do that job. Howard said that Melissa comes to their Wednesday meetings each week, without pay, and gives them some good ideas. Howard said she's really smart and funny. Howard said he'd have to talk to her seriously about hiring her. A listener called in and suggested that Howard bring in his own food every day instead of sending someone out for it. Howard doesn't have time to do that. Howard told KC that he was disappointed in him but he has a hard time firing people so he's going to stay. He said he'd like to hire Melissa to replace KC but that won't happen. While Howard was still yelling about his raisins John Popper walked, or waddled, in to the studio.
- John Popper Comes In. 9/8/99. 8:45am
John Popper of the band Blues Traveler came in to promote his new solo album ''Zygote'' this morning. He walked in while Howard was yelling at Assistant Producer KC. John joined in on the fun and KC ended up yelling at him. John even volunteered to get Howard's food for him. Howard said that would be pretty cool. Eventually Howard kicked KC out telling him that he was disgusted by him. After that was over Howard spent time talking to John Popper about his new solo album and whether or not Blues Traveler is still a band. John said that even though he's done a solo album and the bass player, Bob Sheehan, recently died, the band will probably go on. He said that he's meeting with the rest of the guys on Friday about whether or not they'll continue. Howard said he heard that John now weighs over 400 pounds. John confirmed it saying that he's addicted to food. He apparently drowns his problems in food. He said the first place he went after Bob died was McDonalds. Howard told John he hates to see him in such poor condition because he's so talented. Howard went on to tell him how he used to be fat and decided to get thin. John said he's trying to lose weight again but it's hard to do it when he's on the road touring. He's scared now because he had a heart attack that wasn't really a heart attack. He told Howard how he was in a hot tub having sex with his 25 year old girlfriend in Hawaii when he had chest pains. He had to stop the sex thing because of the pain. Eventually a doctor told him he was about to have a heart attack and that he should rest immediately. John's heart attack didn't do damage to his heart though so that's why it wasn't really a heart attack. Howard asked him what he had for breakfast today. John had a bagel with cream cheese and a roast beef sandwich.. all before 8:30 this morning. John said all he wants to do is eat and watch TV. John said that he broke up with his girlfriend because he wanted to go out with other women. He said he learned a lot from her and wanted to try the same things with other women. Howard played some of John's new single ''Miserable Bastard'' and a couple of other cuts from the album before ending the segment.
-- Thursday September 9, 1999 --
- The ''Cave Of Magic'' Card Trick. 9/9/99. 6:45am
Yesterday Howard's buddy Ralph told him about a card trick on a web site that was pretty cool. Howard was amazed by the trick so he tried it out on Robin. The site has you pick a door and then click on an eye then pick a card. It tells you to whisper it out loud and when you click through to the next screen, your card is gone. Howard tried it a bunch of times and kept wondering how it worked. Stuttering John came in and said that someone called in and told him how it's done. It turns out that all of the cards you can choose from are replaced by totally different cards so there's no way you can pick the wrong card. Howard said he felt really dumb after hearing that. He tried it again and John's info was correct.. all of the cards were different. Howard started to give out a web address but it was so long that he gave up. I was able to find it so here's the link: ''Cave Of Magic''
- Pamela Anderson Lee & Natalie Raitano Visit. 9/9/99. 7:35am
Pamela Anderson and her ''V.I.P.'' co-stars Natalie Raitano and Dustin Nguyen came in to talk with Howard this morning. Howard wanted to talk to Pam about 2 things; breasts and Tommy Lee. He said that both Pam and Nat were wearing great outfits when they came in. Nat was wearing a shirt that showed off her tight belly. He didn't describe Pam's outfit. Howard also told Pam she looks great on the cover of Maxim magazine this month. Pam said she doesn't like the picture and said she actually rejected it but they used it anyway. So Howard got around to asking Pam about her breast implant removal. Howard had thought that she had just gotten smaller implants but it turns out she actually had breast reconstruction after getting her huge saline implants removed. She said one of them had ruptured and she didn't know about it until they were removed. They were removed through her nipples so Howard wondered if she'd lost sensation there. Pam said they're now more sensitive than before. Pam said she doesn't know how it got out that she had the reduction because she didn't tell that many people. She's now down to a B or C cup. She thought the implants looked ridiculous on her small frame so she got rid of them. Pam said that Nat has seen them and thinks they're great. Pam said that she's seen Nat's and her's are great also. Everyone on her TV show ''V.I.P.'' were fine with her removing the implants. Pam managed to get a plug in for her toll free order line for some kind of makeup and her special thong panties. That's at 1-877-6-PAMELA. Howard also asked her if she had any labia work since he had the labia doctor on yesterday. Neither Pam or Nat had any labia surgery. They ended up talking about ''moose knuckle'' and ''camel toe'' for a couple of minutes. Howard also jokingly asked Dustin if he'd had any labia surgery. That's a negative. The next subject Howard was interested in was the fact that Pam went back to drummer Tommy Lee after they'd been broken up for a year. They'd broken up after Tommy had allegedly pushed Pam around. Howard asked Pam if she was ''home sick for Tommy's billy club.'' Pam said that Tommy has changed and has stopped drinking. She just wanted to make things work with her family. She said they're very happy now and Tommy makes a great father. Howard spent a short time talking with Dustin. It turns out he was the Asian guy on ''21 Jump Street'' years back. He plays Nat's boyfriend on ''V.I.P.'' Howard had some info on him like the fact that he escaped Vietnam with his family. His friend was killed trying to escape. Howard didn't spend much time with Dustin, he quickly got back to Pam and Nat. He also took some phone calls from listeners. At one point Pam brought up the fact that Nat once slept with Scott Baio. Nat said it was a horrible experience and that Scott was really rude. Pam also dated Scott and was engaged to him at one point. Pam claims that she doesn't remember what sex with Scott was like. Probably because Tommy was listening to the show this morning. Before the end of the segment Howard brought in a couple of women who claimed to be Pamela look-alikes. The first one was a blonde named Kim. Howard said that she had to be kidding about looking like Pam. He said she might pass for Suzanne Somers but not Pam. Kim said a lot of people stop and tell her she looks like Pam. The next look-alike was Raquel. According to Howard she really didn't look like Pam. She was a brunette with a round face and Howard told her she must be nuts. Howard also noticed that she had a huge ''caboose.'' He actually said ''You have enough caboose for 6 trains!'' Howard said she needs to lose 30 pounds. She said she just had a kid 3 months ago so that's why she's out of shape. Howard asked to see her breasts and she whipped them out for him. He said they were really nice. Dustin was impressed that Howard can make that happen. The new season of ''V.I.P.'' starts the weekend of September 25. Check your local listings for time and channel.
- The First Porno Of The Month Club Discussion. 9/9/99. 8:55am
Howard's new ''Porno of the Month Club'' had it's first discussion this morning. Porn star Janine and the director of ''Seven Deadly Sins'' came in to discuss the movie with Gary, Stuttering John, Robin, Jackie, Fred and Howard. A couple of weeks ago Howard announced the name of the movie so that the audience could rent it and play along with the discussion. Everyone on the show saw the movie so they discussed it with Janine and director Ren Savant. The movie has gotten many good reviews in from the porn industry and Howard seemed to enjoy it also. The budget was around $80,000 which is pretty high for a porno. It was mostly shot on 16mm film although the first 10 minutes are on video. The movie also stars Michael J. Cox and James Bonn. Howard thought the name Michael J. Cox was pretty cool. Janine's part in the movie calls for her to make love to herself and Gary found that to be really great. He said that she's his favorite porn star and this is his new favorite movie. Howard questioned Ren about how he goes about finding the men in the movie and whether or not they all wear condoms during filming. Howard said at one point it looked like one guy wasn't wearing one but Ren said it's the camera angle that makes it look that way. Halfway through the segment Howard noticed that Janine had her tongue pierced. She was talking with a lisp the whole time and that's why. She just had it done about a month ago so she's not used to it yet. Howard told her to get rid of it but she said it's something different and she likes it. You can watch the movie over at VividVideo.com and you can find out more about Janine at her web site: TeamJanine.com.
- Kevin Bacon Calls In. 9/9/99. 9:35am
Actor Kevin Bacon called in this morning to promote his new movie ''Stir of Echos.'' Howard told Kevin that he saw the movie with his wife and kids and they all really enjoyed it. He said it's kind of like ''The Sixth Sense'' type of movie. Kevin gets hypnotized in the movie and has the power to channel dead people. Kevin told Howard that he was making his day saying that he enjoyed the movie. Howard also said he enjoyed watching a movie called ''White Water Summers'' that Kevin was in. He saw it on HBO and liked it so much he watched it 3 times. Kevin said that was a really bad film and couldn't believe Howard liked it. Kevin said it was reshot a bunch of times and they actually ran out of time shooting it during the summer. They moved from Canada to the U.S. To New Zealand just to make it look like it was taking place in summer. Howard also asked Kevin how his wife Kyra Sedgwick is doing. Kevin said she's going to be playing a morning drive shock-jock on a new TV series. Howard said he'd like to give her private lessons since most actors go overboard when they play parts like that. Kevin also said he has a new Bacon Brothers album out called ''Getting There.''
-- Friday September 10, 1999 (Replayed on Master Tape Theatre on Sunday, December 22, 2013) --
- Backstage At The MTV Video Music Awards. 9/10/99. 6-7am
Howard and the gang taped today's show last night from backstage at the MTV Video Music Awards last night. They started taping before the awards show started so there weren't many guests to start off with. Howard decided that they'd have Gary, Stuttering John and Jackie all get drunk during the show so they were all drinking Heinekin's. Howard started off talking to Mark McEwen from ''CBS This Morning.'' Not the best guest but it was all they had at the time. Howard spoke to Mark to use up some show time while they waited for real guests. Mark and Howard have known each other for quite some time so they goofed around with each other for a few minutes. Howard talked to Mark about his show and how they're going through some changes that will begin on November 1. He gave Mark some suggestions on what they could do to make the show interesting.After blowing off Mark McEwen Howard took a break. After the break he was talking about how Gary and John were getting drunk but the biggest drinker, Jackie, wasn't drinking. Jackie says it's too early to be drinking but Howard thinks that he's just not doing what he asked him to do and he's just being stubborn. Gary's speech was already slurred by this time. Howard also spent a couple of minutes talking to Promotions Manager Joe from MTV who hooked Howard up at the awards. Joe was wearing some type of dress or something. Howard told him he had to have balls to wear something like that.
- Backstage At The MTV Video Music Awards. 9/10/99. 7-8am
Howard started off the hour listening to Chris Rock's hilarious opening monolog. He was ready to take a break but Ricky Martin won the first award of the night so Howard listened to his acceptance speech then took another break. When they came back Kid Rock was hanging around so they brought him on. Kid was looking for some beer but Gary may have stockpiled it for himself. He was on his 6th beer! John was on his 5th but it didn't show. Gary was getting belligerent and was staring at Robin's breasts. He told her how hot she was looking. Kid Rock was telling Howard how he spent the previous night hanging out with Lars Ulrich, Sean Penn and Tim Robins and how cool that was. Aerosmith's Steven Tyler and Joe Perry showed up backstage so Howard had them hang out for a few minutes. They'd just performed on stage with Kid Rock and Run DMC a little earlier. Howard kissed some ass for a couple of minutes then heard that more possible guests were waiting in the wings so he cut short the segment and took yet another break. Wyclef Jean was the next guest to sit down and talk to Howard. Howard's been a fan of Wyclef's since the Fugees. Wyclef said that the Fugees are still there but since Lauryn Hill is out touring with her solo stuff she hasn't returned his phone calls. Howard asked Wyclef about how he managed to get to JFK Jr's funeral but he said he doesn't talk about stuff like that. He said he was invited to sing a song but didn't get into many details. After Wyclef left Howard found out that David Bowie's people told Gary that he wouldn't be doing the show. A hot looking black woman standing in the wings caught Howard's eye so he had Gary go over to find out who she was. She turned out to be Miss Draya from some Top 40 station in Phoenix, Arizona. Howard spoke to her for a couple of minutes but she was kind of annoying so he gave up on that. He said she had a nice belly but she was a little too annoying. Howard took another break to see if they could find some guests.
- Backstage At The MTV Video Music Awards. 9/10/99. 8-9am
Pamela Anderson Lee, Natalie Raitano and Dustin Nguyen all showed up to do the show again. They were on yesterday but Howard didn't mind having them on again. After Pam did the show yesterday she went over and did Rosie O'Donnell's show. She mentioned Howard and Rosie almost had a stroke. Pam said she didn't know she wasn't supposed to mention his name. After her segment she told Rosie that she should do the show but Rosie said she's too scared to do it. Rosie also doesn't like the way Howard calls her names and stuff. The MTV people were rushing all of the guests off the show so Pam was only there for about 5 minutes. She told Howard she was going out to party that night and told him that he should go. Howard said he's just going home to sleep.After another break Howard had Gavin and Robin from the band Bush. Gavin was sporting a new red hairdo. Howard spent some time talking to Gavin about his girlfriend Gwen Stefani from No Doubt. It sounded like they may be having problems in their relationship but Gavin wasn't talking. Up next was Wu Tang Clan's Method Man. Method Man is a fan of Howard's and spent quite a while talking to Howard.
Howard took another break and came back with Mark McGrath from the band Sugar Ray. Howard tried to get some kind of story out of Mark about him dating Carmen Electra but he wasn't talking. He said he went out with her but didn't sleep with her. He told Howard the story of how he met her but the story didn't go anywhere. Fred Durst from Limp Bizkit was wandering around so Howard had him come on. Fred also went out with Carmen Electra so Howard figured he must have gone all the way with her. Fred soon broke the news that he didn't go all the way with her! He said they got very close but didn't sleep with each other. The whole time Ricky Martin was on the side of the room but he refused to do the show. Howard pulled out his megaphone and started yelling out his name trying to get him on the show. Ricky ignored Howard for quite a while but eventually broke down and came on the show. Ricky stuck around for about 2 minutes but Fred Durst was getting upset that Howard was ignoring him. When Ricky was leaving he gave Howard his ''Moon Man'' award. Soon after the MTV people came over begging for the award back. Baba Booey was so drunk by now that he just blurted out ''Take your top off!'' to the woman from MTV. Howard said someone had to fellate him to get the award back. He eventually caved in and gave it to her without getting fellatio. Fred Durst was just happy to get Ricky Martin out of there. Fred had an interesting story about Benjy. He was hanging out at K-Rock on Wednesday night and he claimed he saw Benjy watching the Porno of the Month Club movie ''Seven Deadly Sins'' pleasuring himself. He saw Benjy from behind and thinks he was wacking off to it. Benjy came over and denied everything of course. He said he was tempted to do it but didn't.
- Backstage At The MTV Video Music Awards. 9/10/99. 9-10am
While Mark McGrath and Fred Durst were still with Howard, Freddie Prinze Jr. Showed up wanting to say hello to Howard. Howard was thrilled to meet him because he'd just watched Freddie's movie ''She's All That'' last weekend. He said that movie was great and Freddie was very surprised by that. He must not have thought much of the movie himself. After just a few minutes with Freddie Howard took another break. When he came back Ralph was there without much to say. Luckily Stone Cold Steve Austin showed up so Howard kicked Ralph out for a minute. Steve is working a lot now and will be appearing on ''Nash Bridges'' 5 time this season. Howard also noticed that he's dating a woman now. He just got divorced in the past year and he's already dating. Steve said the divorce was well worth it. Now he's having a good time just doing his thing. He's not going to be wrestling for a while because he blew out his knee recently.After another break Howard came back with Lil' Kim who was wearing a really revealing dress that exposed most of her left breast. All she had on the exposed breast was a ''pastie'' sticker. Howard told her she was stealing the show. Lil' Kim had her brother Little Caesar with her. He didn't have any body parts exposed. Kim told Howard she's a fan of his and she saw Snoop Dogg when he appeared on E! with Howard. Howard found out that she dated rapper Biggie Smalls when he was still around. Howard said he thinks she'd sleep with him also. He told her that she'd stolen his heart sitting there half naked. Howard told her she could come back anytime. Kim said next time she'll have both breasts hanging out. After Kim left Gary came over. He was on his 8th beer by now and Howard said he was running the show better than ever. Shortly after that models Rebecca Romijn Stamos and Heidi Kluum showed up. Rebecca said she was scared to do the show so she dragged Heidi over to do the show with her. Rebecca wanted to have Howard talk about the outfits people were wearing at the awards for her show ''House of Style'' but he said he's too important. They spoke about a dinner they had a few weeks back where they got stoned. They were talking about it in code so most people probably had no clue as to what being ''tired'' meant. Heidi was kind of uptight about just about everything Howard wanted to talk about so she kept quiet. While Howard was talking to the models Gilbert Gottfried showed up and begged for a date from Heidi. Howard told Gilbert that when he shows up all sexuality leaves the room. Gilbert did his best Dracula impression for Heidi but she wasn't impressed. He also did his old Groucho Marx impression. Howard told him to do it as if Groucho was begging a German not to be sent to the oven. It was hilarious but Heidi didn't seem to find it funny. There was still a lot more to come so Howard had to end all the fun with Gilbert and the girls.
- Backstage At The MTV Video Music Awards. 9/10/99. 10-10:30am
The first guest in the 10 o'clock hour was Janine the porn star. She was there with the lead singer of Smashmouth, Steve Harwell. There was something strange going on between them so Howard tried to find out what it was. Steve went into a long drawn out explanation that made no sense. To make a long story short he called Penthouse Magazine to try and get a date with a Penthouse Pet runner-up and she wasn't available so he was hooked up with Janine. Janine said it wasn't really a date, they were just at the awards together. Steve kept saying that he didn't really want to sleep with Janine but after some coaxing he finally admitted that he'd like to sleep with her. Rapper Snoop Dogg showed up a couple of minutes in and said that he's enjoyed many of Janine's pornos. He sat down for a few minutes and spoke to Howard. He said that he'd been smoking some weed that night but he wasn't that high yet. Howard asked Snoop how his pimping business was going. Snoop said he's got 15 women in the 'States and 25 overseas. The business is going well. Howard spent a while with everyone then had to take another break. After the break Howard wrapped things up and ended the show.
