MarksFriggin.com - Stern Show News

Howard Stern Show News Archives.

For The Week Of 8/16/99 to 8/20/99

-- Monday August 16, 1999 --

Howard Still Sick But Back To Work. 8/16/99. 6:05am
Howard returned to work after being out sick for 3 days last week. He said that he got sicker after going home early on Wednesday. He had a cough and body aches and he's still suffering from something today. He and Robin spent a little while talking about some of the news stories they missed last week. Howard also took a bunch of phone calls from angry listeners. There were quite a few people upset with Howard for taking off 3 days. Howard kept one guy on for quite a while. That guy was calling Howard names and screaming about how his movie failed and his TV show failed. Howard thought he was pretty funny so he let him rant for 10 minutes. Some people called in to defend Howard but the guy was relentless.
Captain Janks Strikes Again. 8/16/99. 6:50am
Phony phone caller Captain Janks struck again last week while Howard was out sick. He called Howard with the tape this morning. Janks called a TV station out in Salt Lake City, Utah after they had a major tornado rip through the city. Janks said CNN was airing the show so he was seen all over the country. He called in and told the news anchors that his gay friend KC went out and yelled something about Howard and something blew up. The anchors got really mad that Janks got through and yelled at the producers to do a better job of screening the calls. Click over to www.captainjanks.com to hear the call for yourself.
Mo's Wife And Mother Show Their Breasts For A Movie Plug. 8/16/99. 7:10am
This guy Mo came in with his wife and mother. He wanted to plug his movie ''Discovering Daisy'', which hasn't even been made yet, by having them show Howard their breasts. He said it's pre-advance promotion for the unmade movie. Mo, a former plumber, claims that he used to work in Hollywood and did a lot of plumbing for the stars out there. He said that's what his movie will be about. He said he has a $1.5 million budget. Howard had Mo's mother whip off her top first. Howard said her breasts were pretty nice for a woman over 50. It turns out that she's been married 6 times and Howard figured it was her breasts that got her in trouble. Mo's wife Kim also showed Howard her breasts. Howard wanted to see their asses also but Mo said that the deal was ''breasts for a plug'' so no asses. After they showed off their stuff Howard let Mo plug his movie. Mo claims that his movie will gross more than Howard's movie. He says the movie should be out sometime in mid-2000. You can find out more at www.hollywoodactor.com.
Porn Actress & Dwarf Bridget Powers Comes In. 8/16/99. 7:50am
3'10'' tall, 78 pound porn actress Bridget Powers came in to talk to Howard this morning. She came in to promote her movies, which include ''Mighty Midget'' and ''Midget P.I.'' among others. She's only 19 years old and has only been in the business since April. She told Howard that she just started having sex when she was 18 years old so she hasn't had many guys. She said she got into the business after some woman saw her dancing at a Gothic dance club somewhere. The woman gave her a number to call if she wanted to do some gothic porn. She figured she didn't have anything to lose so she went for it. She didn't tell her mother about if for a couple of months but now she knows and is okay with it. Howard saw one of her movies and there were 5 guys banging her. She said that none of them used condoms but she knows the risks and all of the guys were tested before filming. She showed Howard some of her body but didn't get naked for him. She also said she's not easy when it comes to sex with guys. She said she has to get to know a guy before she'll sleep with him. Howard took a couple of calls while she was there and one guy wanted someone to measure her next to the Gary puppet in the studio. Jackie went ahead and did it. Bridget was just about a head over the puppet. After Howard saw how odd Jackie looked standing next to Bridget he decided to try it himself. He went over to her and said all he could see was the top of her head. Howard and Jackie both said that she was really hot looking for a dwarf. To order Bridget's movies you can call (323) 461-0611 and her fan club address is at P.O. Box 29182, Los Angeles, CA 90029.
Goofing On A Dumbass From Memphis. 8/16/99. 8:45am
A female listener from Memphis, TN called in with a dopey question about the movie ''The Blair Witch Project.'' Howard noticed that she was kind of gullible and decided to goof on her. He proceeded to tell the 20 year old that he knows that ''The Blair Witch Project'' is not really a fake documentary. He told her that he knows the guy who actually found the footage and that they even have footage of the Blair Witch but the government wouldn't allow them to include it in the movie because it might cause mass hysteria. The woman believed every word Howard said. Howard then decided to sell her a bridge. Howard told the woman that he's in a program where he receives money by owning a piece of the Brooklyn Bridge. He said that he pays a certain amount each month and gets back about 3 times as much as he puts in from the toll money collected. He then told her that she could get in on it by sending in $300 a month. Then, after sending the $300, she'd get $1500 in return. He asked her if she'd be interested and she went for it. Howard told her that he'd put her on hold and give her the information. Then Howard remembered that he just needed to give her a phone number... Jackie's 922-WINE joke line. The woman got a piece of paper and pen and took down the 516-922-9463 phone number. Howard then told her that a bridge is going to be built between New York and Virginia and she could get in on that deal also. At one point she did ask Howard if he was pulling her leg. Howard told her he wasn't and she believed him. She's probably kicking herself now. Howard said it's so easy to make money in this country and he just proved that point.
How To Beat Your Wife. 8/16/99. 9:15am
This guy Brian from Michigan called in to talk about a skit he did on his cable access show ''Something To Laugh At.'' At first Brian started to explain how to beat your wife without being caught but Howard revealed that the guy was just goofing around. He did what was supposed to be a funny sketch where he demonstrated how to beat your wife. The town wasn't happy with what he'd done and he got yelled at by churches and the town council in Waterford, Michigan. He said he still has the show which airs at 12:30am Friday nights in Waterford. He was only on for a couple of minutes since Howard and Robin were starting to do the news.
Sarah The Intern's Wheel Of Fortune Appearance. 8/16/99. 9:20am
Sarah the intern, who won the Intern Beauty Pageant last week, came in to talk about her appearance on Wheel of Fortune. She flew out to California and shot the appearance recently. She said she ended up winning $6000 but wasn't the overall winner on that show. She figured out a couple of puzzles herself but said it's harder than it looks when you're actually there. She said she also won some parting gifts like denture cream. Howard also brought up some 2 Truths and a Lie game stories that they never got to. She told Howard what some of them were like..
- She had breast reduction surgery because her back bothered her.
- She fell off a cliff while in Israel.
- Someone offered to trade her for some camels and donkeys in Israel.
- She once threw up in a glass at a party and someone accidentally drank it.
The one she made up was the breast reduction surgery story. The rest of them were true. Sarah said that her Wheel of Fortune appearance will air October 26. She said she'd call in to remind everyone about it.
-- Tuesday August 17, 1999 --
Porno Of The Month Club Possibilities. 8/17/99. 6:20am
Howard will be starting a Porno of the Month Club in the near future. He was inspired by Oprah Winfrey's Book of the Month Club to do this. Each month he'll do a special segment where he announces a porno for everyone to watch. This morning he mentioned a few of the possible pornos that we'll be watching. Some of them include:
- Body Language
- Seven Sins
- Talent Scout
Howard said don't buy any of these yet, wait until he announces which one it'll be. If you have suggestions feel free to send them to the show. Just check my Phone Book page for the address.
Jackie And Fred Fighting. 8/17/99. 7:05am
After a commercial break this morning Howard came back and said that Fred and Jackie got into a fight. Apparently Fred is suffering from a migraine and he's on edge. Fred read a commercial for Howard since his voice is still shot and half way through it he had to switch headphones for some odd reason. That struck Jackie's funny bone and he goofed on Fred one too many times. They must have gone off on each other when only Howard could hear them. When they came back from commercial they were still goofing on each other. Fred tried to explain why he'd made that headphone swap but Jackie kept interrupting and that pissed Fred off even more. Eventually he gave an explanation but it didn't make much sense to anyone but Fred. Eventually Howard told them to put an end to it so they could move on with the rest of the show.
Howard Receives A So Called Award. 8/17/99. 7:10am
Howard thought he was going to get a real Billboard award this morning. What he got was an award from a guy who makes up awards. The guy told Howard that his company works with Billboard Magazine to make awards ''available'' to artists who have gotten into the top 10 charts in the magazine. In other words they sell awards to artists for about $100 a pop. Howard said the award was really nice looking and he was happy to take it though. The guy told Howard he didn't have to pay for the award he just wanted to give out his company's phone number.. 888-545-0088. Howard asked himself why he's constantly embarrassed on his own show every day.
Gary Garver Celebrity Interviews. 8/17/99. 7:25am
Howard had tape of Gary Garver out at some Rhino Records Retrofest where has-been celebrities gather to sign autographs. Gary interviewed Billy Grey (Bud from ''Father Knows Best''), the guy who played Eddie Haskel on ''Leave it to Beaver'' Ken Osmond, Leif Garrett (ahhh what did he do?) and June Lockhart from ''Lost in Space.'' The best interview was Billy Grey. He answered every question too honestly. He admitted to smoking pot and that he'd do a homosexual act for a million dollars. He also said he's had a gay sex fantasy and that he masturbates often. He even said he's cheated on his wife. After the homosexual questions Howard and the gang started talking about whether or not they'd do it themselves. Howard thinks Jackie would do it in a heartbeat and Gary said when he was stuck at home with his mother he would have done anything for a million bucks. Howard said if he was poor he'd probably do it but it would have to be with a good looking guy. The interview with Eddie Haskel didn't last long. When Ken found out Gary was from Howard's show he ended the interview. He said he's not a fan of Howard's and walked away. Leif Garrett stuck around for most of Gary's questions but he didn't have any good revelations. Gary finally asked him what he thought of Howard. Leif said he's ''..a pompous know-it-all but that's okay..''. June Lockhart barely made it through 4 questions before she walked away in disgust. Gary asked her if there are too many Jews in Hollywood and if she's smoked marijuana. She said ''Excuse me'' and walked away.
Chuck Zito Calls In From Hospital. 8/17/99. 8:05am
Tough guy Chuck Zito called in to update Howard on his condition after a motorcycle crash. Chuck is still in the hospital 17 days after his crash. Chuck said that he broke his ankle in 5 places and it's a mess. One bone was broken in 8 places. He said that he was riding Mickey Rourke's Harley in a curve at around 45 MPH when he hit some kind of slippery fluid in the road and crashed the bike. He said he was in some real pain and had to be taken away in an ambulance. He's hoping to be out of the hospital by the end of the week. Howard and Robin asked him if the shooting of his HBO show ''Oz'' would be interrupted because of his accident. Chuck said he's already shot a bunch of episodes so there's no problem.
Scratch & Sniff Panties. 8/17/99. 8:10am
This guy Jim who invented scratch and sniff panties came in to demonstrate them for Howard. Jim brought in 3 models, who were wearing the panties, for Howard. There was Joey, Misty Sky and Sasha. 2 of them are from Matrix Models and the other is a stripper. Howard spoke to Joey first. She turned out to be pretty interesting. She told Howard how she models for Penthouse magazine and does those ''pee'' shots. Robin noticed a tattoo on her that was pretty bad so she pointed it out. It was a Betty Boop with a machine gun. It turns out that she was in the Marines! She went in at age 16. Everyone was surprised by that. Misty Sky told Howard that she's posed for Hustler and will be in that magazine in January. She claims that her name is her birth name, not a made up stripper name. Sasha is a stripper and she was pretty quiet. She didn't have much to say. Eventually Howard got around to scratching and sniffing the panties. Howard covered his eyes so he couldn't see the panties and scratched the little pictures. He'd then sniff his finger and the panties. Each time he said the smell of tobacco overwhelmed the smell of the panties. Each of the women smoked and drowned out the smell. Howard guessed at a couple of them but got them wrong. There was blueberry muffin, rose and cherry smells. Jim wasn't much of a speaker and Howard thought he was kind of odd. He said he was inspired to do this after visiting a strip club and getting a whiff of something nasty when a stripper got too close to him. You can get the panties from cautionunderwear.com or by visiting your local Hot Topics or Spencer Gift store.
Yankee Game Seats Filled With Freaks. 8/17/99. 9:05am
Howard has tickets to the August 28 Yankees game which are behind home plate. He's planning on filling three seats with some freaks. Since the seats are seen during just about every pitch they're going to stick Nicole Bass, Beetlejuice the dwarf and one other freak who's been on the show. Howard said he wanted to put Bigfoot Matt there but he's demanding a first class ticket to fly out to New York. KC came in with a list of people who were possibilities. The best one was Gary the retard. Most of the other people mentioned are not visually freaky like Beetlejuice and Gary the retard. Mark your calendar for Saturday, August 28 when the game is scheduled to air nationally on Fox.
Leonardo DiCaprio's Cousin Shows Up Again. 8/17/99. 9:10am
This guy who claims to be Leonardo DiCaprio's cousin showed up at the station today. He was on a couple of weeks ago and was wasted on Ecstasy. Today he was sober and admitted that he lied about being Leo's cousin. He didn't really have anything new to add today but did do a little rap for Howard. Howard said it wasn't any worse than what he hears in today's music. By the end of the interview Robin had given this guy a new name.. Crazy Larry.
-- Wednesday August 18, 1999 --
Howard Just As Sick As He Was Last Week. 8/18/99. 6:05am
Howard sounded just as bad this morning as he did last Wednesday when he went home sick. He said that he's now unable to sleep at night and that's making things even worse. His voice was shot and he said he skipped out on a meeting with an advertiser yesterday afternoon. That pissed General Manager Tom Chiusano off but Howard didn't care. Howard said Tom just doesn't understand that he's sick. He's tried different herbal remedies to try and get some sleep but nothing is working. AJ Benza called in at one point and gave Howard an ''old Italian'' recipe for a sleeping pill. He said you take a glass of red wine and 2 teaspoons of sugar, heat it in the microwave for a short time and drink it. AJ also told Howard about being out at the Playboy Mansion a couple weeks back when Ralph was there. Ralph told Howard that he stole a woman away from AJ at the mansion but AJ said that wasn't true. He also said the woman Ralph was with wasn't that great. Ralph has been telling Howard that she was really hot but AJ doesn't agree. After AJ Howard listened to some voice mail from listeners calling in about Howard's illness. Each call was someone making fun of Howard for going home sick last week and calling him a pussy.
The UsedPad.com Creators Call In. 8/18/99. 7:05am
The creators of a web site that sells used tampons and pads called in this morning. Natalie, the first one on the phone, had a very heavy accent and was hard to understand. Howard was having a hard time communicating with her. Then a guy got on the phone and he was just as hard to understand. The two of them told Howard how they sell tampons and pads from celebrities as well as normal people. They claim to have tampons and pads from Pamela Anderson, Renee Russo and Julia Roberts. You can check out their site at www.usedpad.com and bid on them yourself. The guy told Howard that he also has a new product that he's bringing out called ''Hot Chick'' and from what I understand it's some kind of female scent that you can put on yourself. Howard and Robin wondered how they can prove that these pads and tampons are actually from the celebrities they claim they're from. They wouldn't tell exactly how they do that but they guarantee it somehow. Howard asked them which of the celebrities had the heaviest flow out of the three celebrities. Howard guessed that it was Pamela Anderson and was correct. They also said Renee Russo has quite a heavy flow.
Playboy Triplets Dating Game. 8/18/99. 7:35am
The Dahm triplets, who posed in Playboy magazine recently, came in to play a dating game with three of Howard's listeners today. The three 21 year olds, Nicole, Erica and Jacklyn, were brought in by this guy David Krieff who has brought other guests to the show in the past. Every time he comes he demands that he sit in the studio and today was no different. He said if he wasn't allowed in the studio he would take the girls away. Howard brought him in and tried to talk some sense to him but it didn't work and he sat in for the whole segment. Howard told him this is the last time they do business with him and he didn't seem to have a problem with it.
Howard eventually brought the triplets in and spent some time talking to them. The girls were all dressed alike and said they do that often. They all have breast implants that they got on the same day at the same doctor. They said they had always been an A-cup so they got the implants for self esteem. Now they're all C-cups. None of them are married and they all live in the same 3 bedroom apartment. Howard asked them if they'd ever slept with the same guy at the same time. They said they've never done that and that until recently they didn't even get undressed in front of each other.
After talking to the girls for quite a while he started the dating game. He brought each guy in one at a time and found out a little bit about each one. Here's what the girls had to choose from:
1. Blind Bob - Went blind 11 years ago, was raped in the woods as a child and by a gym teacher, wife died from muscular dystrophy. He hasn't had sex in about 5 years.
2. Stuttering John Jr. (John the Stutterer) - 31 year old virgin. Has a major stuttering problem. He's on 5 psychiatric drugs for stuttering and other problems. He has no job but Howard said he may be the next star of the show. He's never even kissed a woman other than a cousin.
3. Blind Duvitt - Blinded by diabetes 10 years ago. Has had sex but not for a while. Lost his seeing-eye dog when it was hit by a car.
During Duvitt's interview Gary came in and said that he didn't think the guy was really blind. He said the guy was looking at one of the interns when he was talking to her. Duvitt immediately yanked out one of his fake eyes to prove that he was blind. Gary quickly backed off of his accusations. Howard called Gary ''Sherlock Moron'' and told him to get out of the studio. After all was said and done the triplets had to pick one of the guys. They wanted to pick Howard but he wasn't available. Stuttering John Jr. was praying that he'd win and the girls found that cute so they ended up picking him. The girls met the two losers and shook their hands and gave them kisses. Then they met Stuttering John Jr. He was trying to be as sweet as possible to them and said that he doesn't stutter in the presence of beauty but that only lasted about 1 second. He was soon stuttering up a storm. The Dahm triplets have a TV show that will be airing on UPN in the fall called ''Battledome'' and some other stuff is in the works. You can find out about them and see at www.dahmgirls.com. They were also promoting this little finger vibrator called Fuku Oku that's available at www.fingerthing.com.
Jan Michael Vincent A No-Show. 8/18/99. 8:45am
Actor Jan Michael Vincent was scheduled to be on the show today but he didn't show up. A woman who called in earlier in the show asking to meet Jan Michael did show up though. She told Howard that she's always been a fan of his and really wanted to meet him. Howard told her to head on down and she did. Howard had her come in the studio. She was upset that Jan didn't show up and was almost in tears. Robin asked her if she's seen the guy lately because he's had a rough time in the past few years. She said she has seen him but still wants to meet him. Howard told her she could stick around to wait and see if Jan shows up but he never did.
Talking Stock Tips. 8/18/99. 8:50am
Howard was thinking about doing something for the audience. He wanted to pick a stock then announce the stock to the audience. A lot of the audience would buy the stock and drive the price up. The problem was that no one was sure if it's a legal thing to do because it's artificially inflating the price of a stock. Howard had stockbrokers, lawyers and even his father calling in to talk about it. Not one of them was sure if it was legal to do or not. Everyone's advice was different. Tom Chiusano didn't want Howard to do it without some legal advice because he doesn't want anyone getting sued over it. Howard didn't see it as artificially inflating a stock price. He said he'd just recommend the stock like the so-called experts do on CNBC. Eventually Howard said that he wouldn't buy the stock himself, he'd just let the audience do it. Then he just gave up on the whole idea. Since nobody had a good answer he chose not to do it at all.
-- Thursday August 19, 1999 --
Howard Gets Some Sleep.. With The Help Of Drugs. 8/19/99. 6:05am
Howard was having trouble getting sleep lately so he finally broke down and went to a doctor for some advice. This morning Howard said he finally got some sleep after taking a prescription drug called Ambien. He said it didn't knock him out immediately but once he fell asleep he was out for the whole night. He thought it would hit him hard and fast so he was waiting for it to take effect when he took it last night. He said he was walking around his house waiting for it to take effect but it came on slowly. His voice was still in bad shape this morning though so the sleep didn't help that much. A couple of listeners called in and told Howard to be careful not to get addicted to the stuff. Howard said his doctor only gave him 10 pills and he's only planning on taking it one more time.
Stuttering John 2 Calls In With Playboy Date Update. 8/19/99. 6:40am
John, the stuttering 30 year old virgin who won the date with the Dahm Triplets yesterday, called in with an update this morning. Howard heard that the Dahm girls were very reluctant to go on the date with John but once they got some alcohol in their systems they changed their attitudes. Doug from E! said that after they drank a shot of tequila it was like they were on a date with Brad Pitt. After a while they were showing off their very tiny thong underwear in the bar. John was very nervous so he was stuttering up a storm at the bar they went to. Howard asked John a few questions about the date but by the time John spit out the answer Howard forgot what the question was. Howard explained John's stutters best as sounding like a ghost going ''WooooWooooooOOOOO.'' Howard asked John if he'd like to go out and do some interviews like Stuttering John does. John said he doesn't have the ''B..b...bbb..b..b....bbaaa..b...Balls..'' for something like that. Howard said they'll could also bring him in to play the Mike Walker gossip game or something like that. Doug told Howard that at the end of the date John got kisses on his cheek from the Dahm girls... He's still a virgin.
Marty Ingels Calls In To Complain About George Carlin. 8/19/99. 7:50am
Old comedian Marty Ingels is up to his weird stuff again. Back in April(Friday April 3) he and his wife Shirley Jones were trying to get Howard kicked off the air through this group that Steve Allen started. They called in and argued with Howard and eventually got kicked out of the group they were in. Now Marty is going after George Carlin for some things he said in his recent HBO special. Howard spoke to Marty about his marriage before getting to the George Carlin stuff. It turns out that his wife left him to be with her kids. Marty says that his step kids are making his wife choose between them and him and he doesn't like that. Marty doesn't understand why they accepted his help when they were struggling through their careers and now they're against him. Howard said that maybe they just don't like him as a person. Marty doesn't want to accept that. Eventually Howard let Marty get to his complaints about Carlin. Marty has taken out ads in newspapers trying to get Carlin's Emmy nomination taken away from him because of the subject matter in his stand-up routine. Howard had a few clips of the Carlin routine and even though Howard might not agree with everything Carlin says he understands that it's comedy. Some of the things Marty is against are how Carlin talks about how everyone wants to protect children and Carlin says ''F--- the children..'' and explains how the ''soccer dads'' exploit their children and stuff like that. Carlin also talks about how this country is based on bullshit. He goes on to say how the guys who wrote the declaration of independence were slave owners but they said all men are created equal. Marty also pointed out another clip where Carlin talks about bullshit stories and says the biggest bullshit stories come from religions. Howard played the clips and they were funny. Howard thinks that Marty is jealous of Carlin or he just has too much spare time. Marty says Carlin has the right to say what he says but he also has the right to take out ads in the paper. Howard finally ended the segment and told Marty he hopes he gets back together with his wife.
Jm J Bullock Comes In. 8/19/99. 8:30am
Actor/comedian Jm J Bullock came in to promote a play he's in called ''When Pigs Fly.'' The play is at the Coronet theater in Los Angeles and tickets can be purchased by calling 310-657-7377. Jm J used to be on the TV show ''Too Close For Comfort'' and he was a regular on the old ''Hollywood Squares'' show back in the 80's. Howard has read some interesting things about Jm J lately. He read that Jm is HIV positive but he hasn't gotten sick from it. Jm J said that about 5% of the people who get it are immune and he just lucked out. He said the doctors have studied him a little bit because of that. He's had the virus since the early 1980's and is in fine health. Howard called him ''Super Gay Man'' because he's been able to avoid getting sick. Jm J was also in the paper for getting arrested on drug charges. Jm J said he was using Crystal Meth and was sent to rehab for it. Howard and Jm also spoke about how he grew up dating girls but eventually turned totally gay. He said his first gay experience was at a church camp when he was 14 or 15. Another camper who was about 18 had him give oral sex. He said he was always flamboyant as a child but thought it was just a phase he was going through. Howard told Jm that he was very nice to him when he did the ''Hollywood Squares'' show back in 1989 or so. Howard filled in for Shadoe Stevens when he was hosting the show and Jm was a nice guy. They spent a few minutes talking about that then Howard took some phone calls for Jm. Most of the calls were gay bashers telling Howard that Jm sounded so gay that they thought they were going to get AIDS from their car speakers. One caller said he went to Jm's play when it was in New York and didn't know it was a ''gay play'' until he saw all of the guys in the theater. He said he and his girlfriend were laughed out of the theater because they were straight.
Insane Clown Posse Comes In. 8/19/99. 9:10am
White rappers Insane Clown Posse came in to make a big announcement and to plug a show they're doing tonight at Hammerstein Ballroom in New York City. They showed up an hour and a half late so Howard said he was only going to give them a few minutes to talk but they stayed for over a half hour. Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope have been on the show many times in the past and they always cause some controversy. Today there were two bands waiting to confront them but first ICP wanted to make their big announcement. On of the guys announced that they were chosen to appear in the Family Values tour with Limp Bizkit, Filter, DMX and another band. The tour is sponsored by MTV. Howard thought that ICP had finally been accepted... Then ICP made part 2 of their announcement. 3 weeks after they were picked to appear on the tour, MTV said that if ICP is part of the tour they would pull out of sponsoring it. Then Rolling Stone magazine and Spin magazine both said that they wouldn't cover the tour if ICP was in the tour. Therefore, the band was kicked off the tour. Now ICP is pissed and they're going to go after MTV. They said their fans are soldiers and will do whatever they tell them to do. They said they'd send the fans in with flamethrowers. Howard said that's not right for MTV to pull a stunt like that. After that discussion Howard brought in the first band, Coal Chamber, who wanted to confront ICP. Coal Chamber was on a tour with ICP but they were kicked off and they wanted to know why. ICP told them it was because they weren't selling any tickets with them on the tour so they got rid of them after just a couple of shows. ICP said that they don't have a problem with Coal Chamber, they just didn't work out. Eventually the guy from Coal Chamber accepted the explanation. Then there was another scary band that showed up called Slipknot. Howard thought Slipknot wanted to yell at ICP but they just came in and said they like ICP and have respect for them. The guys in Slipknot were wearing masks and it kind of scared Howard. The two bands spoke for a couple of minutes but nothing happened. ICP said that's the kind of band they'd like to tour with because their look is fresh. A short time later the Publicist for Coal Chamber came in and argued about the reason for them being kicked off the tour. He heard different stories and spent a couple of minutes arguing about the whole thing. ICP stuck by their story. ICP's album ''The Amazing Jeckel Brothers'' debut at number 4 on the charts but quickly dropped off quite a bit. They explained that their fans just ran out and bought it in the first week instead of waiting like people usually do with other bands. They're also wrestling in the WCW. You can catch them Monday nights on the TNT cable channel.
-- Friday August 20, 1999 --
Howard's Sleep Update. 8/20/99. 6:05am
Howard gave us an update on his sleep once again this morning. He said he had to take his Ambien sleeping pills to get some sleep last night. He said he took the pills last night, watched some TV and went to sleep. He didn't sleep all night though, he was up by 2 am. He's still got problems with his voice also. Robin suggested that he go to the doctor to make sure he doesn't have strep throat. Howard doesn't like taking antibiotics to cure himself and his doctor even told him to see if he can wait it out. Howard said he doesn't plan on taking his sleeping pills after last night. He doesn't want to get addicted to them.
Saying Goodbye To The Interns. 8/20/99. 6:35am
Howard said goodbye to the latest batch of interns today. Seven interns came in to the studio to give their thanks for working on the show. Jan the 41 year old mother of 4 came in first to talk to Howard for a few minutes. She's heading back to Nashville to finish up her schooling. Next up was Scott the high school graduate who's heading to college. Howard warned him about what college will be like and he didn't paint a pretty picture. Scott said he's already heard from his roommate and he told him he was fired from his job at a deli for stealing.. and Scott has to live with the guy. Leia and Alberto quickly said their goodbye's and then Chris the intern spoke to Howard for a few minutes. He made the mistake of telling Howard which college he's going to... Something like Salve Regina. He also made the mistake of telling Howard his SAT score of 730. Howard goofed on him a little bit about both of those things. Up next was Giordana who is going to Brown University. She proudly told Howard her SAT score of 1470. Last but not least was Sarah the intern. She told Howard she was very happy that Howard found her cute enough to invite her in to the studio so many times during her internship.
The Gossip Game With Guest Wood Yi. 8/20/99. 7:15am
Howard had Wood Yi (Steve the engineer) come in to play the Mike Walker gossip game this morning. Wood Yi made a bunch of goofy one-liners before playing the game. Mike calls in each week with 4 gossip stories. 3 of the stories are from his National Enquirer gossip column and one of them is false. Everyone tries to pick the false story. Here are this week's stories:
1. Judge Judy started crying when her favorite pair of reading glasses disappeared. They were her father's glasses and meant a lot to her. It turned out they were accidentally picked up in a pile of papers and were soon returned to a very happy Judge Judy.
2. Actor/Director Ben Stiller was angered by an interviewer who suggested that he should stay in front of the camera instead of directing after his ''Cable Guy'' flop.
3. Melanie Griffith's husband Antonio Banderes has been keeping an eye on her weight during the filming of a new movie. He's directing the movie and was watching her weight every day. He'd weigh her and if she gained a pound or 2 he'd ban donuts from the set.
4. Louie Anderson, chubby new host of the Family Feud TV show, demanded a golf cart to get around the studio lot. He has it brought to the parking lot so he can drive himself to the studio so he doesn't have to schlep through the lot.
Wood Yi picked number 4 as the false story. Howard, Robin and Jackie all chose number 2. Fred picked number 3. The actual false story was number two. Three winners this week! After the game Mike told Howard that he was also told to lose weight for his upcoming National Enquirer TV show. He has to lose 10 pounds. Howard and Mike discussed the William Shatner 911 call before getting off the phone. Howard wondered why Shatner didn't pull his wife out of the pool before calling 911. Mike suggested that maybe because he's an actor he's used to people doing things for him and he didn't know what to do. Howard let Wood Yi say a few more one-liners before ending the segment.
Insane Clown Posse Meets Adina The Deaf Girl. 8/20/99. 8:00am
Insane Clown Posse returned today to have it out with Sharon Osbourne. Sharon called Gary after ICP's appearance yesterday and challenged them to a fight. She was a little late so Howard brought ICP in to meet this deaf girl that was waiting to come on the show. Adina the deaf girl came in to talk about her meeting with Marilyn Manson 7 years ago. She was dressed in a dominatrix outfit and according to Howard she was pretty good looking. She came in and she was able to read lips to communicate with everyone. Howard did his best deaf person voice and spoke with Adina about her experience. She claimed that she met Marilyn Manson when she was 17 years old and the band made her wear a ''meat helmet'' made out of a steak and hot dogs strung together with string. She didn't have sex with them though. ICP said if she was their fan they would have banged her. Adina had a couple of web sites to promote before she left. She has her own site at www.tarasexxx.com and there's another site with a video of Marilyn Manson giving oral sex to a guy at www.mansonvideo.com. When Shaggy 2 Dope heard that part he almost puked. He'd heard about that but wasn't sure if it was true or not. Howard had to take a break in preparation for Sharon Osbourne's appearance so he ended the segment with Adina.
Insane Clown Posse VS Sharon Osbourne. 8/20/99. 8:35am
Yesterday Insane Clown Posse was on the show and a band called Coal Chamber was there to confront them. Coal Chamber was kicked off ICP's tour and they wanted to know why. ICP explained it and during that discussion ICP called Coal Chamber's manager, Sharon Osbourne, some names. Sharon heard about it and called Gary's voice mail late in the show. She basically said she would beat the crap out of them and she's not afraid of them because she weighs 225 pounds. Howard invited her down and called ICP back to invite them in to confront her. The both agreed and showed up this morning. Earlier in the show ICP said that if Sharon made any move toward them to touch them they'd beat the crap out of her. Unfortunately that didn't happen. What did happen was pretty funny. Sharon, who is Ozzy Osbourne's wife, came in and yelled at ICP and called them washed up losers. Sharon said that ICP has only sold 400,000 albums and that it's stopped selling already. ICP didn't stand for her crap and fought right back calling her a fat bitch and calling Ozzy a ''half retarded junkie'' among other things. The three of them went at it for over a half hour constantly calling each other names and arguing about the number of albums ICP has sold. Howard kept them separated so that they wouldn't get into a fist fight. At one point Sharon threw her glasses at the guys but that was as far as that went. Sharon told ICP that ''Ozzy's farts have more musical credibility..'' than they do. They pointed out that she once pushed Korn's manager down the stairs. She admitted to that and even added that she punched him before pushing him down the stairs. She didn't get into the details but it sure sounded like it would have made a good story. Sharon even offered to bet the boys $50,000 that their next album wouldn't sell more than 200,000 units. That album doesn't come out for another year and a half but ICP said they'd up the number to 500,000 units. Sharon also said that Coal Chamber would be suing ICP for breaking their contract with them. Needless to say, they didn't settle anything with their arguments. Howard eventually had to wrap everything up and let each of them get in their last words.
Woman Evaluation Canceled. 8/20/99. 9:30am
Howard planned on having an evaluation of some women today but they didn't show up for some reason. Howard had the three judges in to let them get a couple of words in since they showed up today. The first judge was Al Goldstein of Screw magazine. Al plugged his web site and bad mouthed Jackie a little bit while he struggled to breathe. He was gasping for air after each sentence he said and it was hard to listen to. Al says that he's really overweight and can barely take a breath. The little midget Beetlejuice was also there but he didn't have much to say. He will be appearing at a some marina in Bayonne, New Jersey on Sunday. You can find out more at www.jollydwarf.com. Beetlejuice will also be at Yankee game with Nicole Bass and Gary the retard sitting behind home plate on August 28. Be sure to tune in to Fox that day for the game. Howard's buddy Ralph was the third judge and he didn't have anything to plug today.