MarksFriggin.com - Stern Show News

Stern Show News Archives.

For The Week Of 2/9/98 to 2/13/98

-- Friday February 13, 1998 --

Captain Janks Calls Bob and Tom As Billy West. 2/13/98. 6:25am
Captain Janks made a great phony phone call to Howard's competition in Indianapolis. He called in as Billy West. Billy used to be on Howard's show and he did the voices of Ren and Stimpy for Nickelodeon. He's also the red M&M on the tv commercials. Howard couldn't play the tape on the air this morning because it's someone else's radio show but he did explain what happened. I heard the call myself and it's pretty damn funny. If you have RealAudio you can check it out over at www.koam.com. Janks calls these guys and pretends to be Billy. He doesn't sound a thing like Billy but Bob and Tom are so dumb that they can't tell. They even ask ''Billy'' to do some of his impressions and when he does he doesn't even sound different. He does a Larry Fine impression and says ''I'm warning you..'' and the two idiots crack up laughing. He did that a couple of times and they laughed hysterically each time. Then Janks tells them that they suck and Howard rules and they're stumped. They just go into a song and don't have anything to say. They just mumble some crap about knowing what that was. It was great.
Steve Grillo's Last Day. 2/13/98. 6:35am
Today was Steve Grillo's last day working for the Stern show. Gary and Steve were in the studio talking about how they had to have a meeting on how to bring Howard his food. What was supposed to be a 10 minute meeting turned into an hour yesterday when Steve had to tell the new guy, K.C., how to keep Howard's appetite satisfied during the morning. Gary said that he didn't know how much Steve had to do just to keep Howard well fed. Steve explained how he has to have the cook clean the grill before he cooks Howard's eggs and he has to test the milk and orange juice that he gets. It's really amazing how much he had to do. Now his job may be split between K.C. and Mike Gange. Howard gave Steve a going away present of like $2000. Steve asked if he could still be included on the guest list for when they go to Scores. Howard said he'd think about it.
Marilyn Manson Comes In To Plug His Book. 2/13/98. 8:50am
Rock star Marilyn Manson came in to plug his new book ''A Long Hard Road Out of Hell''(Click to order). Marilyn has been on the show before and even appeared at Howard's movie premiere. Howard's a big fan of his music also. It must have been a pretty big deal that Marilyn was coming in because a couple of the interns that work there got dressed for the occasion. Howard had a list of some of the more interesting stuff in the book. They went over some of that. They also got a phone call from a woman who's son was arrested for wearing a Marilyn Manson t-shirt with the F-word on it. Marilyn said that he would like to send the kid a bunch of stuff. Howard also asked Marilyn if he'd banged porn star Jenna Jameson the night of the ''Private Parts'' premiere. Manson said that he didn't remember much about that night. He said that he was blocking some of it out of his mind. He said that he may have taken a bath with her and that they'd made out a little bit. He has a girlfriend now. He's going out with Rose McGowan from the movie ''Scream''. They've been going out for a couple of months now. According to Marilyn the book has changed him. He said writing the book made him grow up a little bit and it will affect his music in the future. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing. Marilyn will be traveling all over the country to do book signings. Here are a few dates:
- 2/14 - Tower Books New York City
- 2/16 - Tower Books Philadelphia
- 2/17 - Newbury Comics Boston
- 2/20 - Tower Books Chicago
- 2/21 - Virgin Megastore San Francisco
The Mike Walker Game. 2/13/98. 7:50am
Howard was supposed to have a special guest to play The Mike Walker game today but he didn't show up. Since it's black history month Howard was going to have the guy who invented Post-It Notes come in. The guy never showed up so he just had Stuttering John and Ralph come in and play. Here are this weeks 4 stories. One of them is not true, try to pick it.
1. Someone at a restaurant asked Burt Reynolds if it was his real hair on his head. Burt replied ''In 2 payments it will be''.
2. OJ Simpson met Monica Lewinsky's father on a golf course. He said he'd be willing to give them some advice on how to handle the press.
3. Fran Drescher was stopped from boarding a plane when she couldn't produce a photo ID. Someone had to bring it from home to the airport so she could go on her way.
4. The Spice Girls favorite souvenir that they've collected on their many trips is a roll of toilet paper stolen from Nelson Mandella's bathroom.
Stuttering John, Jackie, Robin and Howard all chose number 2 as the false story. Ralph chose number 1. The actual false story was number 1. Ralph actually picked the correct story.
-- Thursday February 12, 1998 --
Steve Grillo's Final Days On The Show. 2/12/98. 6:40am
Steve Grillo is leaving the show. Tomorrow is his last day. He was telling Howard how a journalist called him to see if he's planning on writing a tell-all book about his life on the show. He also asked Steve if he knew anything about Howard dating newscaster Michelle Marsh. Neither of these two stories are true. Steve won't be writing a tell-all book. As a matter of fact Jackie said that he got the same phone call when he was out for 6 weeks during his contract negotiations. Steve is moving on to become a casting director for some independent film. Will anyone miss him?
Dr. Kent Holtorf Gives Advice On Passing Drug Tests. 2/12/98. 7:20am
This Doctor wrote a book about drug testing called ''Urine Trouble''. He talked to Howard a little bit about how these drug tests aren't really fair. He says that certain over the counter drugs like Sudafed and Xantax can cause a drug test to come up positive for amphetamines. He also had some advice for passing these drug tests if you do use drugs. He said you can spray Visine into your urine when you pee in the cup. He says you can also take aspirin or vitamin C before the test. He says that they change the outcome of the tests. The book is available through the following number: 800-247-6553.
Howard Prepares For Chevy Chase To Call In. 2/12/98. 7:30am
Yesterday Gary let everyone know that Chevy Chase would be calling in today to end the big feud that's been going on between them for about 5 years. Howard wanted to go through all the tape they had to show the history of the feud. He spent about 45 minutes talking about what happened between them and how Chevy acted so strangely when Howard would get him on the phone. For more about the history of this feud, check out www.koam.com. Howard played tape of Chevy bad mouthing him and the phone calls where they spoke to each other. Chevy never admitted to listening to Howard's show but he said that Howard was an ass and that he wasn't funny. Howard could never understand why he would do such a thing if he'd never heard the show. Howard and the rest of the gang were spending so much time on this stuff that they decided to bet on whether or not Chevy would even call in. Chevy was supposed to be plugging the fact that ''Caddyshack'' would be airing this Saturday. Howard told everyone what he was planning on asking Chevy and how he would go about it. Everyone thought that it would probably go the way it went in the past...that is, Chevy would act dumb and quickly get into an argument and hang up on Howard. Howard's theory was that Chevy's kids are probably listening to the show now since they live in New York now and the kids want Chevy to make up with Howard.
Special K Calls In With Big News. 2/12/98. 8:50am
You may remember Special K, the old woman who gives oral sex to men free of charge. Well she called in today to announce that she has hit the 2000 mark in her conquests. Special K started to do this after her husband cheated on her. She usually takes young stockbrokers from Wall Street and gives them oral favors for no charge. She surpassed the 2000 mark on January 30 and is now up to 2035. It may be higher now, who knows. She does this to guys and they don't wear condoms. Howard had to be careful with his wording but he found out that she doesn't swallow. Special K did Crackhead Bob a favor one time and gave him oral in a bathroom while the E! camera waited outside the door. Keep an eye out for that show to re-run on E!
Chevy Chase Calls In. 2/12/98. 9:17am
To everyone's surprise, Chevy actually called in. It sounded like he was going to do his ''Who is this?'' bit like he's done in the past but he quickly got away from that. He was actually pleasant with Howard and seems to have changed his attitude. Howard let Chevy plug the ''Caddyshack'' movie which will air this coming Saturday night at 8pm on ABC. Then Howard asked Chevy about why he was bad mouthing him if he hadn't even heard the show. Chevy gave an acceptable explanation about how Howard had called him while he was filming ''Fletch 2'' and asked him about Julianne Phillips' divorce from Bruce Springstein. At the time it pissed Chevy off so when he heard Howard's name mentioned one time he just went off on him. That was acceptable to Howard so now they're okay and the feud is over. Meanwhile, Richard Belzer had come in to plug some stuff. He was the one who gave Howard Chevy's home phone number at one time. Belzer and Chevy also made up since he was there. They weren't really in a fight but they hadn't seen each other in years. Howard also told Chevy that he stuck up for him when FOX had canceled his show and bad mouthed him to the press. Chevy thanked him for that. Howard asked Chevy if he'd seen ''Private Parts''. He said that he saw it and liked it! Howard also asked him if he's ever listened to the radio show. Chevy said ''I listen to it all the time...'' so maybe he has become a fan. Chevy also admitted to having some experiences with Stern fans who have said stuff to him in public places. That's probably one reason he wanted to make up with Howard. Maybe they'll stop from now on.
For those Richard Belzer fans out there, he's on a show called ''When Cars Attack'' tonight at 8:00 on ABC. He also mentioned his comedy CD ''Another Lone Nut'' and ''Homocide'' which airs Friday nights at 10 on NBC. Belzer stuck around and commented on the news like he usually does when he comes in.
Howard's Intern Leaves Knicks City Dancer Job. 2/12/98. 10:05am
Heather the intern, who was a Knicks City Dancer, has left her dancing job. She wouldn't come on the air today to talk about it but it was the cover story for the New York Post today. I don't have all of the details but it sounds like she was either let go from the team or she quit because of some things that were said about her and Patrick Ewing. She's said in the past that she never dated anyone on the team but someone called in one time and said that she was going out with Ewing. If Heather ever comes on to discuss the situation I'll be sure to mention it here. You may be able to read more about it on the New York Post web site.
-- Wednesday February 11, 1998 --
Siobhan The Transvestite Calls In. 2/11/98. 6:30am
This guy used to be on the show years ago. At the time he was a transvestite and a very strange one at that. He hasn't checked in for years so this morning was kind of a reunion on the phone. Siobhan isn't really a transvestite anymore but he still has his hormone induced breasts from back then. Everyone talked about the old times when Siobhan was doing some really strange things. He used to be attracted to Gary of all people. He was also attracted to Howard because he was so nice to him. He even wrote some letters to Howard's wife saying that he wished she were dead so he could be with him. So now Siobhan is a squatter in some apartment in New York City. He takes in stray cats. I don't know how he supports them but he has 7 litter boxes for all of them. I can only imagine the stench of that apartment. Siobhan says that he's not really gay anymore. He's a-sexual. Well that's enough about that story.
Spice Channel Girls Come In. 2/11/98. 7:30am
The Spice Channel is holding some kind of contest to find a ''Spice Girl'' (not to be confused with the singing Spice Girls of course). The Spice Channel is a porno cable channel. This woman Kylie Ireland came in with her friend Nicole to promote the contest. Howard had them put on some of the vibrating panties to see if they could get off on them. The panties seemed to work on Kylie but not on Nicole. 20 year old Nicole said that she's never had an orgasm so it wasn't surprising that the panties didn't work on her. Nicole was wearing the Tickle Panties and Kylie was wearing the remote control vibrating panties. Howard was controlling the remote. Kylie had the right idea, she was pressing the vibrating part on to herself so she'd feel it better. It must have worked because she was getting excited. Howard had her try and recite the Pledge of Allegiance and the alphabet. She could barely do the pledge because of the panties. Before she left she had to plug her web site: www.kylieireland.com and the Spice Channel web site at www.cyberspice.com
The Return Of Jessica Hahn! 2/11/98. 8:15am
Howard has finally forgiven Jessica Hahn for not doing the 1994 New Years Rotten Eve Pay-Per-View event. Back then Howard told Jessica that he wouldn't let her come back on unless she put one of his boogers on the end of her nose for the show. Well, Jessica wasn't wearing any booger today but she was on the show. Jessica is in town to do Geraldo's show so Howard let her visit. Howard had an interesting story to tell about the two of them. About a year ago when he was out in L.A. doing movie stuff he went somewhere with Jessica. She had some pot to share with Howard and he was into experimenting with drugs again so he took 3 hits from this big fat joint. Howard said that he was literally knocked out by this stuff. He had to be helped out of the building because he was so out of it. Some people were telling Howard that it may have been laced with something. Jessica says that she wouldn't do anything like that to Howard. After that incident Howard said he swore off drugs once and for all. He also said that there was another woman at this place who did the same thing because it affected her the same way. Howard wasn't giving any names so there's no telling who it may have been.
The main reason Jessica is in town is because everyone wants her view on the whole Monica Lewinsky/President Clinton thing. Jessica said that she thinks Monica should just go ahead and pose for Playboy when the trial is over with. She doesn't think that Monica should hide after everything is over with, she should take advantage of the situation and make some money off of it.
Jessica is still with her Producer boyfriend out in California. She said that they don't spend much time together but he supports her. She even had an assistant with her today. The assistant was really cute according to Howard. Howard was trying to find out if there was any lesbian stuff going on between them and found out something interesting. The two of them have been in the same bathtub together although they say they've never done any lesbian stuff. Before Jessica left Benjy the nutty intern came in to meet Jessica. He said that he was a big fan of Sam Kinison's so he wanted to meet his ex-wife.. Well that shows how much he knows about Sam. Jessica was never his wife. They just dated for a while. He also had some other facts wrong but he got a hug from her anyway.
Robert Duvall Calls In. 2/11/98. 8:25am
While Jessica Hahn was still in the studio Howard got a call from Robert Duvall. Stuttering John came in and told Howard that he hated to interrupt but Michael Keaton was on the phone. When Howard picked up the call he could tell it wasn't Keaton. Duvall was goofing around and was pretending to be Keaton. Duvall was just calling in to say hi after getting his Academy Award nomination yesterday. He was only on the phone for a couple of minutes. Howard thinks that Mr. Duvall is his buddy now since he did the show.
Indianapolis/Wilkes Barre Press Conference. 2/11/98. 9:20am
What a nightmare of a press conference this was. It was supposed to start at 9:00. Indianapolis had some problem with their feed so they had to call in on a phone. They started the press conference 20 minutes late and they still didn't have a good connection with Indy. Meanwhile, Wilkes Barre Pennsylvania was also in on the press conference so Howard took questions from them. It was the usual crappy questions from the half-assed reporters. Eventually Indianapolis got their act together and got in on the thing. Once again, it was the same crappy questions that Howard gets from every city he enters. They all think that Howard's brand of humor won't work in a ''conservative'' market. There were a few instances where Howard was sweet talking some of the women reporters. That was probably the most interesting part of the whole thing.
-- Tuesday February 10, 1998 --
Stuttering John Interviews. 2/10/98. 7:00am
Stuttering John and K.C. The intern were out at a couple of events last night. They got quite a few celebrity interviews. Here's a list of some of the celebs they interviewed: Francis Ford Coppola, Robert Duvall, Matt Damon, Curtis Hanson, Anne Hache & Ellen Degeneres, John Lovitz, Tyra Banks, Craig T. Nelson, George Wendt, Roma Downey and Kathy Ireland. Most of the interviews were real quick ones. The John Lovitz interview was the longest one. John hung in for all of the questions and even complimented Howard on his movie.
Dr. David Jacobs - Teacher Of UFO's. 2/10/98. 7:35am
This guy is a teacher at Temple University. He teaches a class called ''UFO's In American Society''. It't about how aliens are abducting people, impregnating them and taking their babies when they're still fetus'. He says that he believes that the aliens are going through an ''integration process'' where they'll eventually make their way into our population. Howard doesn't believe in any of this crap. The guy has been teaching this class since 1978 and it doesn't sound like he'll be stopping it anytime soon. It's not an easy class like some people would think. He says it's pretty tough. He also has a book called ''The Threat''. You can order it off of my Book Store page if you're interested.
Chuck Zito Comes In. 2/10/98. 8:10am
Chuck Zito is the guy who beat Jean Claude Van Damme's ass the other night at Scores. Chuck came in today to set the record straight as to what happened that night. He said that he didn't ''bitch slap'' him as a lot of people have said. He went through the whole story of how Jean Claude was at Scores with Mickey Rourke. Mickey invited Chuck over to the table to talk to him. While he was there Jean Claude went to the bathroom. When he came back one of the bouncers came over to Chuck and told him that Jean Claude had bad mouthed him in the bathroom. Chuck moved over to talk to Jean Claude and asked him if it was true. Jean Claude admitted to saying that Chuck didn't have a heart or something like that. Chuck asked him a couple more times just to be sure. Van Damme got up to prepare for a fight and before he could kick Chuck's ass Chuck gave him a right and then a left hook, knocking Van Damme over his chair to the ground. When Van Damme tried to get back up Chuck pounded him back to the ground a couple of times. Before all of this the two of them had worked together and it sounded like they were friends. Chuck didn't explain why Van Damme had it in for him. Van Damme only did one interview over in Europe after the incident and he claims that he was trying to do a defensive Karate move but he slipped. Chuck hung around for a short while and talked about being in the Hells Angels. He's also appearing in a series on HBO called ''Oz''. He said that this is the only interview he's done because he thinks Howard is pretty cool.
No Academy Award Nominations For ''Private Parts'' 2/10/98. 8:50am
Howard and Robin listened to the live feed of the Academy Awards this morning to see if ''Private Parts'' would get nominated for anything. Well there were none of course. Melrose Larry Green did make it inside somehow and yelled out Howard's name while the Best Actor nominations were being read. That was the only excitement going on. Howard was pissed that his movie was ignored. He later got in an argument with a listener over the amount of money ''Private Parts'' made. At the box office it made $41 Million which is a lot more than some so called hits made last year.
Howard And Robin Test The Vibrating Panties. 2/10/98. 9:45am
Howard finally convinced Robin to try out these vibrating panties that they've used on a couple of women lately. It took about 5 minutes of arguing but Robin finally caved in. Howard agreed to try them out on himself even though they're made for women. They had to take a break to put the panties on. When they came back to do the news they were both hooked up to the ''Remote Control Vibrating Panties''. They actually have a remote control that works from quite a distance. Robin said that she was in the ladies room and all of a sudden her panties turned on. Howard had hit the remote from the studio and they turned on. Each one of them had a controller so they could control the other's panties. They played with them for the rest of the show. Robin said that it didn't really turn her on. Howard said he got a woody at one point but it didn't last long. So I guess they didn't work out quite like Howard wanted them to. I think they ordered 3 dozen pair so I'm sure we'll be hearing more women trying them out in the future.
-- Monday February 9, 1998 --
Gary Garber Interviews Evel Knieval. 2/9/98. 7:05am
Gary Garber from KLSX out in Los Angeles did a quick interview with ex-stuntman Evel Knieval. He only asked him a couple of questions. One was like ''What's more dangerous, jumping the Snake River Canyon or divorce?'' Evel didn't understand the comparison so he didn't have much of an answer. The final question was about whether or not he's ever broken his penis while doing any of his stunts. Evel thought that question was really stupid and didn't give an answer. That was it for him.
Eileen's Intern Interview. 2/9/98. 7:20am
Last week Howard had a woman in who said she wanted to be Howard's intern. He put her in a pair of vibrating underwear while he gave her an interview. Well another woman came down today to do the same thing. The only problem is that this woman turned out to be a cold fish. She wasn't nearly as into the panties as Aza was last week. Howard also said that there are two types of these panties. There's the Tickling Panties and there's Remote Control Vibrating Panties. One pair that Eileen wore didn't fit her quite right so the vibrating part wouldn't stay where it was supposed to unless she crossed her legs. Howard had her try on both pair but neither one of them really got her off. Eileen's not a college student so there's no way she can be an intern. Howard told her that they'd keep her in mind just in case something came up though.
Stuttering John At Morton Downey Jr. Press Conference. 2/9/98. 8:00am
Howard played tape of Stuttering John's interview with Morton Downey Jr. Downey has become Mr. Nice Guy now that he's gotten over his lung cancer. He has a kid and he's being really nice to everyone for some reason. Downey is getting a new TV show so that was the reason for the press conference. John asked a bunch of questions without interruption because there was hardly anyone at the press conference. He even got a one on one interview after the press conference. Morton basically said that he doesn't hate Howard and he thinks that he's a very talented person. Howard took the compliment but Robin reminded Howard where it was coming from and it kind of took the fun out of it.
Celebrity Jeopardy Practice For Robin. 2/9/98. 8:25am
This April Robin will be making another appearance on Celebrity Jeopardy. Howard decided to have a practice round today. Playing against Robin were David Brenner and two women from ''Baywatch''. Tracy Bingham and Marliece Andrada were the ''Baywatch'' babes. Howard spent quite a bit of time with them before playing the game. Marliece has a layout in Playboy and Tracy has one coming in the near future. After Howard spent all his time interviewing the girls he had to take a break. When they came back they got into the game. There was a Hooters Restaurant girl flipping the cards for the game. The ''Baywatch'' girls were playing as one person. They needed to do that since on their own they would have been down by about $5000 each. They played through the game and obviously Robin did well as did David Brenner. The one brain shared between the two ''Baywatch'' girls could only muster up a score of $200 by the time Final Jeopardy rolled around. David Brenner had $1200 and Robin was at $1900. David Brenner ended up winning after only betting $750 of that $1200 and missing the answer. Robin bet all of her money and missed the answer. The ''Baywatch'' brains blew their $200 when they missed the final question also. Howard got hugs and kisses from the girls after the game.