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Howard and the guys were back from vacation this morning. They played a few different people singing ''The Great American Nightmare'' as the show started. Howard said Fred has to tell him when he's on. He said it's only been 30 years together. Howard said when he has his headphones on he has them off. Howard said Fred runs the beginning of the show. Howard said he's supposed to tell him when they're on. Fred said he usually does but it's his mistake. Howard said he has no one to yell at when he does that.
Howard asked what Benjy is eating. Fred said it looks like some kind of fruit. Howard said he thought he had blocked himself in so he can't see that. Fred said he kind of enjoys it. Benjy said they watch each other. Howard said Fred chews on pens and they get caved in by the end of the show. Howard said that's how Fred stopped smoking. Fred said he had to break the pen thing too.
Howard asked Fred what he sees over in Benjy's cubby hole. Fred said it's an early start for Benjy today. He said he usually lets it sit. He said today he's eating. Howard asked if he brings in grocery bags. Fred said sometimes he does. He said he has a cup of ice or two and some coffee. Howard said Fred is like the Jane Goodall of the show.
Howard asked Benjy why he has two cups of ice. Benjy said the apes before him brought in ice. He said he likes his water cold. He said he pours his water into the cup to get it cold.
JD came in and said that sometimes Benjy will stick his face in his food and take a strawberry out. Howard said the human being has a five fingered hand. He said that's why we're above the animals. Howard asked what he did. Benjy said he licked it out. Howard said maybe the red blotches on his face are strawberry stains. Fred said maybe Pomegranate stains.
Howard said the most interesting thing they learned is that he eats out of his bowl like an animal. Howard asked Fred to keep track of Benjy and give them updates. Howard talked about what Fred could report on like he's reporting on animals.
Howard said Prince was the most talented artist. Howard said forget the guitar playing. He said forget he put out the best movie album too. Howard said the guy could dance like James Brown too. Howard said the guy could play guitar and dance and he could play every instrument. Howard said the idea that he's gone is like Steve Jobs dying. He said if he wasn't such a fucking kook... Howard said he saw Prince do a concert once and he turned out the lights. Howard said he's so sad over this whole thing though.
Howard said a couple of clips went wild on the internet. Howard said Adam Levine performing ''Purple Rain'' hit like 25 million views. Howard said it was fantastic. Howard said it showed off the talents of Adam Levine and showed how beautifully Prince writes. Howard played some of that performance. Howard said that Prince was only 57 years old and High Pitch Erik is still alive. Howard said Jeff the Drunk is still going strong too.
Howard said he watched a few interviews that Prince did years ago. He said Larry King got to interview him and he was so jealous. Howard said he has tried most of his career to get him in the studio. Howard said he was unable to. Howard said maybe he was scared of him. Gary said the last time he tried to get Prince on the show was for his birthday show and his people said that he doesn't recognize birthdays because he's a Jehovah's Witness.
Howard said he watched a video where this guy lends Prince a guitar on Jimmy Fallon and at the end of his performance he smashes the guitar. Howard said the guy could be a dick. Howard said he went to see him and turned the lights off. He said the guy could be a dick. Robin said he was a dick in interviews too. Howard said he thinks that he would have been a fine interview. Howard said he didn't know he was a drug guy. Howard said his name is Prince Rogers Nelson and that's his real name. Howard said another dick move was naming himself with the symbol and calling himself the artist formerly known as prince. Howard said he did love the guy though.
Howard said Prince got kicked out of his house when he was a kid. He said his father kicked him out. Howard said Prince wrote his first song at 7 and taught himself every instrument. Howard said he signed with Warner Brothers when he was a teenager. Howard said his second album had a hit on it. Howard said his first one didn't do so well. Howard said the music got dirty and controversial. Howard said he had the song ''1999'' and ''Little Red Corvette'' on his next album. Howard said Purple Rain really blew him away. He said the movie and album really hit big with people. Howard said that did it for him too.
Howard said he loves Purple Rain so much. He played some of the song and said there's a thing on the internet when Prince performed the song for the first time in public. Howard said it's amazing. He said they've lost a great genius. Howard said he's like a Mozart of our time.
Howard played a bunch of clips of some of Prince's songs and got to ''Darling Nikki'' and explained how that got Tipper Gore to get albums marked with the parental guidance things.
Howard said that Prince was asked to do two songs for the Batman movie. Howard said he was asked to do 2 songs for it but he came to them with a whole album. Howard said he thought it was cool that he incorporated scenes from the movie into his songs and no one was doing that. Howard said some people think it's his worst work but he thinks every song on that album rocks. Howard played a little bit of Bat Dance. Howard said he thinks it's great. Howard said this was when Prince was with Warner Brothers and he ended up changing his name.
Howard said the guy was a great entertainer. Robin said he also put together an all female backing band together. Robin said he had all women on stage. Howard said he wrote songs for other people too. Howard said he wrote hit songs for The Bangles and Sinead O'Connor. Howard said he wrote stuff for Chakka Kahn. Howard said he was a Jehovah's Witness and he would go around knocking on people's doors. Robin said that fit him perfectly because that's another dick move to knock on someone's door like that.
Howard said another famous clip is when he was at the Rock & Roll Hall of fame and Tom Petty got him up on stage. Howard played some of that where you can hear Prince playing guitar on ''While My Guitar Gently Weeps.''
Howard said the guy was such a talent. He said it was news to people that he was that great of a guitarist. Robin said if you watched him on stage you were shocked. She said he was dancing at the same time. Howard said rest in peace Prince and went to break.
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Robin said that Howard said one word about Chyna and then forgot about her. Howard said that's what happened to her in the news. Howard said he read an article in the Enquirer about Prince having HIV since the 90s. Howard said he thinks that must be total horse shit. Howard said that he tends to believe TMZ the most. Howard said he died in an elevator en 5 minutes later they had every bit of information about his drug use. Howard said that Harvey Levin has everyone on his payroll. Howard said he probably has shit on them that they will reveal when they die.
Howard said on Periscope Medicated Pete did a rendition of Purple Rain for Prince. Howard said it was a horrible version. Howard played some audio of Pete doing his thing and talking about how Prince died and he's going to do a tribute. Pete played the song and then mumbled along with it. Howard said he read a study that found that a lot of people get their news from Pete's Periscope.
Howard said Pete has to get a new song at some point. Howard played more of Pete singing and said Pete said he had no words for Prince dying. Howard played Pete talking about what a big loss it was. Pete talked about how he grew up with Prince. He said he's out of words right now and doesn't know what to say. There were people yelling in the background. Howard said he's in a restaurant so that's what you hear in the background. People on Periscope were asking to see his penis so Pete said they shouldn't talk about that right now. JD told Howard he's actually in a cell phone shop talking.
Robin said they have to ask George Lopez about his connection to Prince. Robin said he spoke at his memorial service.
Howard said a lot of people were moved by his death. Howard said they have a lot of new Robin songs. Howard played some of the song parodies that people did to the tune of Prince songs. Howard played a Little Mikey song and one from Eli Braden. Howard said there's a million of them. He played another Little Mikey song. Howard said Eli had another one too. Howard said these guys have been very busy since Prince's death. Howard played the next Eli Braden song. Howard said there were many of those.
Howard said Angry Alice was also talking about Prince. Howard played a voicemail message she left about Prince. Alice felt very sad that he's gone. She said that god or whatever did that can kiss her ass. She said that Prince was a beautiful soul just like Michael Jackson. Howard said Prince touched Alice. Robin said that means he was incredible.
Howard played a clip of Elephant Boy talking about Prince dying. Elephant Boy was talking about him but I have no idea what he was saying. I can usually understand him but not this time.
Howard had a clip of High Pitch Erik talking about Prince dying. He was talking to Shuli and he asked Erik to name some of his songs. He only knew Purple Rain.
Howard said Wolf Blitzer thought the song was ''Purple Haze'' when he did a report on Prince dying. Howard played a clip of Wolf fucking that up. That led to Fred playing ''Purple Haze'' for a few seconds.
Howard said they took some audio of Medicated Pete singing ''Purple Rain'' to people on the street and told them that it was Prince's final performance. Some people thought that was really Prince.
Howard said they asked Mariann what she sounds like when she orgasms and it sounds like someone is putting a knife into her. Howard played the clip and said imagine that if you're a guy. She sounded like she was doing a monkey impression. Howard said he has to figure her husband is in his 50s and it's hard enough to get an erection. Howard asked if that's really what she sounds like. Mariann said she'll keep everyone guessing.
Howard said he wants to talk about Kelly Ripa. Howard said they were on vacation while this was going on. Howard said Kelly walked off her own show because she felt wronged by her show management. Howard said that she felt hurt when it was announced Michael Strahan was going to Good Morning America. Howard said she felt blind sided by the story and she walked away. Howard said that he is very fond of her husband who married him and Beth. Robin said that he didn't marry Howard, he performed the ceremony.
Howard said he likes Kelly and her husband very much. Howard said if they talked as much as they used to he would have given her some advice. Howard said people in show business don't have people to talk to them in a moment like this. Howard said he thinks about giving people advice but he's been through every type of management fuck you so he had a lot of feelings about this. Howard said WNBC almost broke him. He said it was 10 times worse than it was in the movie. Howard said that they fucked with him so much right from the start over there at NBC. Howard said everyone there knew how they were fucking with him. He said it was a lesson in humiliation and frustration. Howard said that was the beginning of being fucked with. Howard said it kept going with upper management over there. Howard said they all ganged up on him and he felt like he was going to be brought to his knees and cry. Howard said there were days he didn't want to get out of bed. Howard said they finally brought Robin in and fucked with her too. Howard said he felt responsible for that. Howard said then he was fired and he got to Infinity and the FCC started to fuck with him. Clear Channel fucked with him and other DJs fucked with him. He said then Les Moonves sued him. Howard said it was Les and Joel Hollander. Howard said he knows humiliation.
Howard said he worked with every Pig Vomit on the planet. He said there wasn't one day when he was being fucked with that he didn't show up for work. Howard said he was under contract and being paid. Howard said he sued Sirius over a money dispute but he showed up for work. Howard said he felt wronged. Mariann added ''Betrayed'' so Howard said goodbye to her. Howard said he couldn't take it anymore.
Howard said he did feel betrayed. Howard said if he felt comfortable calling Kelly he would have told her to take a breath and go to work. Howard said you can't walk off your own show. Howard said he knows she was upset but you have to figure out how to get back on the air. Howard said even if your boss has fucked you. Howard said she should have asked Michael about it or something. Howard said you can't play hooky on your own show. Howard said you have to go in. Howard said he knows it's hard. He said that he would have told her to go in and make something out of it or not. Howard said dress up like Minnie Mouse and go on the air and scream about it or something. Howard said by the time she did anything it was already ugly and she was embarrassed. Howard said making your boss grovel isn't a good thing. Howard said she was treated unfairly but deal with it. He said deal with it and show up for work.
Howard said Kelly is making 20 million a year and the audience is looking at her wondering why she didn't show up. Howard said he would have called her but he didn't feel comfortable doing that. Howard said Don Buchwald has dealt with a lot of these things for him. He said he understands feeling powerless. Howard said maybe she got some bad advice. Howard said there has to be someone she can go to. He said she needs to talk to someone. Howard said he has spoken to people about this kind of thing before and he'd never advise anyone to walk off their show. Howard said he has suffered way worse humiliation and he didn't walk off.
Howard said the show must go on. Howard said if Kelly had someone to talk to she wouldn't have walked off the show. Howard said Mark can't do it because he's too close to the situation. Howard said she needs someone who has a calm approach to business. Howard said he's not sure what Michael Strahan is doing with Kelly. He said she has to show up for work. Howard said it made her look bad. Howard said he would have told her to just show up. Howard said even if she had said that she can't he would have talked her into going into work. Howard said he knows her pain. Howard said she either didn't have someone to advise her or she didn't listen. Howard said he would have told her to show up for work.
Howard said it was too late for him to call anyway. Howard said management will fuck with you. He said he can tell you that. He said it will always happen. Robin said Kelly said it was her second home. Howard said that's horse shit. Howard said it's not a second home, it's work. Howard said there was a time when he had a guy in management who he thought should treat him like a father. Howard said he went to therapy and his psychiatrist told him he's just in business with him. Howard said he was right. Howard said the guy was looking at the bottom line. Howard said Kathie Lee Gifford thought the same thing about her job. Howard said they threw her right out. Howard said they could do that to Kelly Ripa too. Howard said her second home is in Telluride, not there. Howard said a career is a tough thing. He said he's been fucked with by the best of them. Howard said he knows what it's like.
Howard said he's not criticizing Kelly at all. He said it's a tough road to negotiate and it got the best of her. Robin said it's like an invasion of your home. Howard said things can be way worse than they are. Howard said Disney should have gone to her and considered her. Howard said they should have given her a day or two to get over it. Howard said they have this huge corporation to deal with and that's just a fly on their ass. Howard said they don't care. Howard said that's their attitude. Howard said it's what they have to have. He said they're not thinking about her feelings. Howard said they were wrong and Kelly was wrong. Howard said she should have taken a deep breath and taken her fucking. Howard said even if she had gone on the air and talked about what was going on it would have been better. Howard said he did think about calling Kelly but he wasn't comfortable doing that. Howard said he keeps quiet instead. Howard said he doesn't think she would have appreciated it.
Howard said he's an expert on fuckings from management. Howard said he wrote a book about it. Howard said he had little fuckings in the beginning and they got bigger as he got bigger.
Howard had a clip of Michael Rapaport giving the announcement for who was on the show today. They have Nicole Bass coming in next. Howard said that she's coming in to talk about how she's getting back into stripping. She's going to show them her vagina today. Howard said they'll find out what she thinks about the death of Chyna. Howard said they were in the WWF (WWE) together.
Howard wondered who is going to replace Michael Strahan. He said one of the people they interviewed was Arnold Schwarzenegger. Howard played a clip they created using phony Arnold. They had a fake Bill Cosby audition clip and a fake Dave Letterman audition clip too. Howard said they also have Jeff Goldblum. Howard played that fake clip too. Howard played a Tan Mom audition clip after that.
Howard said Robin showed up for work every day even when she was going through her cancer treatments. Howard said he said to the guys they had to be prepared for her not to be there. Howard said she was on the air the day after her 12 hour operation. Robin said it was like a week later. Howard said it was almost the next day.
Howard said he should play a phony phone call. He said they'll do this going into the commercials. Howard said they have Hillary Clinton calling a Soul Food restaurant telling them she's showing up there. Howard played the call and the owner was laughing along with fake Hillary and kept laughing and laughing. They had Hillary asking what kind of bling to wear and that got the woman laughing. Everything fake Hillary said would make her laugh. They had Hillary laugh at the woman and the woman would laugh more. Then they had Hillary choking and the woman laughed. They went to break after that.
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Howard came back and sang along with Joni Mitchell a little bit. Howard said JD fell asleep listening to that. Howard said you can rub him belly like a baby.
Howard said Nicole Bass is coming in to show her vagina. Howard said she asked to come in and strip for them. Howard said he wondered why she was doing it now and she said she's going back into stripping. Howard said he wants to help her out so he's going to have Ronnie in to give her some tips. Howard said he saw Ronnie on Limitless and he was completely cut out of it. Howard said they just used him after the credits. Ronnie said it was the weirdest thing. He said they told him that part of the show was going to be for the team for the next season. He said the part where they raided the pill factory was just a split second. Howard said they used him to get publicity for the show. Howard said they might be desperate when they ask him to be on the show. Howard said he's not sure why Ronnie looked like a stroke victim on the show. Ronnie said that's just the way it came out. Howard said maybe he should have spoken to someone in the FBI. Ronnie said they contacted him the day before he shot.
Shuli said Ronnie mangled the line he had. Howard asked what the line was. Howard played the clip of Ronnie reading his line and he said ''Just lets say'' instead of ''Lets just say.'' Howard said he has to be more subtle. Ronnie said he did 5 or 6 takes and they liked the yelling. Howard said he should have just read the line calmly. Howard said you don't yell about that stuff.
Howard tried to get Ronnie to do the line calmly. Howard said you have to see the clip because Ronnie's mouth is all fucked up. He said they have to celebrate Ronnie with a new dance song. Howard played the EDM song with Ronnie's ''Down on the floor!'' line.
Howard asked if Ronnie is working on the video for this song. Ronnie said not yet. Howard said they will be making one though. Howard said that's some acting.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he thought he was great in the show. He said he watched the whole season and he thought it fit right in with the show. He said the crazy part was fitting. Howard said he spoke to the producer who said they had too many viewers and they wanted to weed out some.
Howard took a call from Mark in Boston who said he thought he was hilarious but he's not sure if he was supposed to be. Mark said that Mundt means loud and obnoxious. Ronnie asked what dictionary that's in. Mark said if you look it up on the Urban Dictionary it's there.
Richard said that JD's cock is hard. He even grabbed at it to check it. Richard said he's hard. JD said he's not. He said he's being an asshole.
Howard asked if it's true that he went to the ballet with his girlfriend last week. JD said yes. Howard asked how boring it was. JD said it wasn't the most exciting thing. Howard said Beth knows not to bring him to something like that. JD said she wanted him to go and it's not something they'll do regularly. Howard said he hopes he got blown afterward. JD said he's not going to talk about that. Howard asked if he liked it. JD said it was okay. Howard asked if Ronnie would ever go. Ronnie said no.
Gary said Ronnie went to see Cinderella on Broadway. Ronnie said Stephanie wanted to see it so they went. He said they sat right up front. He said it was for her birthday. Shuli said that it must have looked like a grandfather bringing his granddaughter out to see the show. Ronnie said he has had people say that it looks like he's out with his daughter. He said they don't get it much anymore. He said she was only 24 when they started dating. He said she's 33 today. He said now she's not walking good because she had an operation. He said it's time to fucking go. He said happy birthday to his lovely girlfriend. Howard said she's his fiancee now. Ronnie said nothing has changed though. Howard asked if she will ever get too old for him. Ronnie said no at first but then said that it could happen.
Shuli said they drove to a show once and Stephanie wanted to do her makeup and Ronnie flipped out on her saying she should have done it during the drive. He said he rules with an iron fist. Howard said Ronnie might have been right in that situation. Howard did his Ronnie impression for a short time.
Howard said they have to get Nicole in there. JD said she looks like Fonzie. Ronnie said he wants to start off. He said that dress will never do. He said no fucking way. Richard said the boots are super sexy. Howard said everyone has to shut up for a minute.
Howard asked Nicole why she's wearing Herman Munster boots. Nicole said it takes a few days to get shoes in her size. She wears a size 14. She said she has a great ''footish fetish'' foot.
Howard asked Nicole about Chyna the WWE wrestler who died. Howard asked if she was friends with her. Nicole said Chyna was a cunt. Howard asked why that is. Nicole said they were pitted against each other and they were supposed to fight. She said that when she started Chyna had copied her outfit. She said that she used the whole leather dominatrix outfit that she was wearing. Fred did his Herman Munster impression of Nicole talking about that. He said she stole her beard and stubble groomer. Fred said she stole her jock strap.
Nicole said that Chyna was on top of the world in the WWF and she was on top of the world in the independent wrestling. Nicole said that she was glad she stole the whole leather thing. Howard said this is like the worst tribute ever. Richard said that he's glad she didn't know Prince.
Howard asked who had a bigger clit, her or Chyna. Nicole said Chyna did. Howard said he thought she was going to show them her vagina today. Nicole said she never said that. She said she showed it to Howard and he doesn't remember it. She said that he pointed the microphone at it like it was going to speak. Shuli told her to rein it in. He said he told her before the show that he was going to do that when she rambles.
Howard asked Nicole about Robin seeing her vagina years ago. Nicole said she was so set up. She said Robin said she didn't know what she saw and it was so set up. Howard asked if maybe her pussy lips are engorged. She said that she doesn't deny having a big clit.
Benjy said he wants to see it and describe it. He said he doesn't want her to be made fun of. Nicole said she's not showing it to anyone but Robin.
Nicole said a few more words about Chyna and said that she admires what she did. Shuli had to tell her to focus again. Howard asked if she has a job at a strip club that she wants to promote. Nicole said she does not. She is looking to remarket herself into the industry. Nicole said she's getting back into it after the death of her husband. Howard said he thinks she looks better with a little less muscle. Ronnie said that it's not going to work if she bulks up again. Howard said he thinks that it looks better with less muscle.
Howard asked what she weighs now. She said she's 215 or 220. Howard had some clips from some appearances she made in the past. Howard played some fake intros they had created for her.
Shuli asked if she would do a fully nude booking. Nicole said she is not going bottomless. She said what she can bring to the industry is her clientele. She said they're men who admire women bodybuilders. Howard asked how old she is now. Nicole said she's 51. Howard asked if she has a boyfriend. She said no. She said she had one but now she has an order of protection. She said that he beat the crap out of her. She said she got pretty beat up. Howard asked what led to the fight. She said his mother is a lunatic. She started to tell a story but never got through it.
Howard asked Nicole if she still gets wet. Nicole said she's miss Niagara Falls. Howard asked if her clit can get in a guy's ass. She said no. Howard asked if she likes guys going down on her. She said she likes both.
Shuli said that Nicole almost got thrown out of a hotel for having sex so loud with her boyfriend. Robin asked what that orgasm sounds like. Fred did his Herman Munster banging his feet sound.
Howard asked if men think she has a penis and then they're disappointed when she doesn't. Nicole said that the guys she dates like that she has a big clit.
Howard asked if Nicole wants to dance for them. Nicole said she's all sweaty. Shuli said he saw her strip and she was so sweaty she looked like she had just stepped out of a pool. Howard asked why she's sweating so much. Nicole said she's sweating now. Nicole said that was her first appearance and she was really nervous. Howard played a couple of announcements that could have been made for her that day.
Howard said Nicole is very muscular. He asked what she wants to dance to. Fred played some ''Dude Looks Like a Lady'' for her. Nicole wanted something else. Fred played another song. Ronnie said he thinks that she could fit in at some strip clubs.
Nicole said she has compared her clit to other's at strip clubs. Howard said that Robin had to have seen something strange down there. Nicole said it wasn't strange. Fred did his Herman Munster voice and said that she hides her clit behind her balls. Howard said he thinks Robin may need to see it again. Robin said she just got over the last time. She's not going to do it again.
Howard had Fred play some music for Nicole. Fred played ''Who Let the Dogs Out'' and everyone cracked up. Howard told Nicole to get into it. Nicole asked to her ''I'm Too Sexy'' for her. Fred did that and Nicole danced for the guys. They all laughed. Ronnie was cracking up. Ronnie said he was laughing at the music.
Richard was gagging at something. Howard said he's going to vomit. Howard told him to calm down. Nicole said now it's like alright guys. Fred was singing as Nicole. Howard told Robin to talk to her as a woman. Robin said she has to get internal and forget everyone and just do her thing. Nicole asked how she's going to get out of that dress. Ronnie said that is the worst dress.
Nicole was stripping down and Richard was close to vomiting. Fred played a clip from the Hindenberg crash. There was a lot going on in there. Everyone was talking over each other. Richard was puking. Howard told Nicole to keep dancing but then said they were done. Howard said Ronnie was giving Nicole a hand job.
Howard told Nicole to get back up there. Howard said she's in some shape. Howard said look at those boobs. Howard said Ronnie got the lap dance. Howard said Richard threw up.
Ronnie said that her stocking was wrong. He said he doesn't get that. He said she has to get some sexy shit. He said she needs some lingerie stuff.
Howard asked JD why he ran out of the room. JD said he didn't want her near him. He said she has bruises on her thigh. Richard said he's never seen anyone run so fast.
Howard said Richard had a violent reaction. Richard apologized for that. He said that there were some bruises and stuff. Nicole said she has scars from what happened to her. Howard said think about how thin JD would be if she chased him around for 15 minutes.
Shuli said he thinks there's a market out there for her. He said a lot of dudes came out to see her at that first appearance. Ronnie said she could be big. He said she has to do small towns in the mountains. He said not in New York City though. He said they won't hire her there. Ronnie said she'd fit right in out in the mountains though. Nicole said she knows she's not in good shape right now.
Howard asked how to get in touch with her. Nicole said Danny at CenterfoldStrips is taking care of her. She said that she doesn't just do strip clubs. She said she's doing other appearances too. She said she used to do bachelor parties and stuff.
Howard took a call from a guy who was playing puking sounds and saying he was sick from hearing that dance. Nicole said the market she hits is the bodybuilding market. She said it's the fetish industry. She said they want to see her in private. Howard said he just noticed her nipples are pierced. He didn't see that earlier. He said there's a lot going on there. Shuli said one tit is in New Jersey and one is in New York too.
Howard said they have Chyna on the phone. Howard took the call from the guys in the back who were playing clips of Chyna on the show.
Howard said Nicole shaved down for the appearance. Nicole said she did. Howard said call Danny over at CenterfoldStrips. Ronnie said he used to bring girls in for them back at K-Rock. He said they've known him for a long time.
Nicole said she does foot fetish stuff and other things too. Howard said he got a note saying she brought a stylist with her up there. Howard asked what she did. Nicole said she curled her hair. Howard asked if she did her make up too. Nicole said she did.
Richard said Nicole used to do phone sex too. Howard said if you want to book Nicole get in touch with Danny from CenterfoldStrips.
Howard took a call from a person calling herself Denise who was actually Sal in the back talking about what Nicole has taught her. Then Nicole started coughing over him. Nicole said she had pneumonia. Howard said she probably still has it. Howard asked why someone in the health industry has something like that.
Ronnie said that he likes her standing there with her tits out. He was cracking up. Howard said Ronnie likes her. Ronnie was laughing and saying that's hot. Howard said she has her tits out. Nicole said she was evicted from her apartment and she didn't get her stuff back. Howard said he'd rather not get into all of that.
Howard said he wants to wish her great success with her strip career. Nicole said it's not a strip career. Howard said whatever it is. Shuli told her to rein it in again. Howard said he likes the new look and said she has nice hips. He said her feet are sexy.
Howard said that Nicole is putting it all out there. Howard said she's a fighter. Fred did his Herman Munster voice again. Nicole said Fred is the only one she's ever had a crush on who is on the show. Howard asked JD if he would fuck her or Caitlyn Jenner. JD said that's a tough one but went with Caitlyn. Howard thanked Nicole for coming in and wrapped up with her. Howard went to break a short time later. They played a couple of bits before going to break.
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Howard said today is Jeff the Drunk's birthday. Howard played a clip of Jeff coughing to the tune of Happy Birthday. Robin said she thinks that he's 50. Howard asked if he's 49 or 50. Howard said the guys say 49. Howard said Jeff is 49. Howard said he'll play this song on his 50th. He played the coughing song again.
Howard said Sour Shoes called them as Artie commenting on Kelly and Michael. Howard played the clip of Sour doing that impression and talking about how hot Kelly looks. He did his Gary impression helping Artie out with a name while he was talking about Kelly Ripa. Then he breaks into his Blue Iris impression at the end. Howard said that's something else.
Robin asked if Howard watched Michael and Kelly together when she came back. Howard said he did. He said it was very uncomfortable. Howard said he couldn't broadcast like that. He said it would kill him. He said they keep it light on the show.
Howard said Richard went to Kansas City to see his parents and a baby was on the plane screaming the whole time. Howard played the clip of this kid screaming constantly. Howard said that was the whole flight. Howard asked if you can imagine. Howard asked what the trouble could be. Robin asked what the parents look like. Howard said it could be the ears clogged or a wet diaper. Howard said just stay home or use the car. Howard said no man can take that sound. He said women have a higher tolerance to it.
Howard asked Robin what she thought of this Larry Wilmore saying the N-word to the president. Robin said it seems like they could find something else to do. Robin said she hasn't heard it. She said she heard that it wasn't funny. Howard had a clip of Larry Wilmore who took over for Stephen Colbert on Comedy Central. Robin said Howard tried to warn Colbert that this was going to be tough. Howard said he does show up for work though. Howard said that's his point. He said everyone gets fucked with.
Howard played the Larry Wilmore clip and Larry told Obama ''You did it my nigga!'' Howard said he doesn't think he should do that in front of the President. He said that's some tricky stuff. Howard said he's not sure even black people should be using it. Howard said Mel Gibson loved it though.
Howard took vote on whether or not she should take a call from Bobo. They voted yes. Howard took the call and Bobo said he loves hearing the stories after vacation. He said listening to the 20 years of Sal was great. He said he's so glad he hired Sal and Richard. Howard asked the guys if they wanted a re-vote. They all voted no to the call this time. Howard played a song parody about Bobo and said that maybe he has something to say. Bobo kept talking about the Sal special. Bobo said everyone loved it. Howard asked if it's still a no from everyone. Robin, Fred and Benjy all voted no again. Howard played another Bobo song parody.
Bobo said he's got to go to his green colored question. He said it means it's a good one and Howard should pick up on it. He tried to use the word unequivocally not. Howard told him to keep using it until he gets it right. Bobo kept trying and got it wrong every time. Howard told him to go ahead. Bobo asked if there is a serious side to Robin. Howard played a song parody about his bad toupee. Bobo said ''Oh god...'' Howard asked how that can be a green question. Howard picked up on Bobo's Toupee and asked how that can be a green question. Bobo's Toupee said that was a shit brown question. He said they're all shitty questions.
Howard said of course there is a serious side to Robin. Bobo asked another question about Captain Dennis but Howard had started to play another song parody about how bad Bobo's calls are.
Howard let Bobo go after that. Bobo said he had one more thing. Bobo's Toupee kept talking over him. Bobo asked where Ralph is. Bobo's Toupee said no one gives a shit. Bobo said Robin didn't even answer. Robin said no one cares. Bobo said maybe people want to know what's going on with Captain Dennis. Howard played another song parody.
Howard said Bobo had a statement and two shitty questions. Howard said this is horrible. Howard said he's had better days. Bobo said he has. Howard said he has to play Shuli's interview with Bobo where he says he was almost hospitalized last summer when he was banned. Howard played a clip of Bobo talking about how he had a psychiatric evaluations on him and he was told he had to cut down on the show and he was too obsessed with the show. Shuli asked if it had anything to do with him moving to Florida. Bobo said it did and it had a lot to do with the ''band''. Howard said he was banned, he's not in a band. Bobo was talking to Shuli about how he has this passion for the show and he thinks of it as his second family and the psychiatrist looked at him funny. Howard let Bobo go after that.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he wants to kill himself when he hears a Bobo call. the guy said he saw a band do a Prince tribute and a Michael Jackson tribute. He asked Howard which one he thinks is better. Howard said Prince for sure. Howard said Prince was cooler and wrote better songs. Howard said Prince could play guitar and dance better than Michael Jackson. Howard said he could look femme but still be cool doing it. Howard said there's nothing to compare Michael Jackson to Prince. Robin said the Thriller album. Howard said no one was better than Prince. Robin said Michael fronted a band at 5 years old.
Howard said speaking of singers Carly Fiorina is not one. Howard said Ted Cruz named her his running mate for something he's not even running for. Howard said she stared singing to Ted's daughters at some event. Howard played the clip of her singing to the girls. Howard said he felt so bad for those girls. Howard said Carly is trying to come off as likeable but it just came off really creepy. Howard said he knew a kid who was really unpopular and the mother would try to sell her kids to them by singing about her two sons. Howard said he was so creeped out by that. Howard said the sales pitch didn't work out. Howard said she came up with a jingle for her kids. He said it was so creepy.
Howard played the Carly Fiorina clip again. Howard said if you play it backwards he guarantees it's satanic. Howard played a clip of the song being played backwards with a message in it. Howard played another clip where they used it as a creepy phone call in a horror movie.
Howard took a call from a guy who said Bobo sounds like Dice's mentally challenged brother on his TV show. Howard said he saw the premiere episode and it was very good. Howard said Dice was always a good actor. He said the show is good. Howard said that people like to know his opinion so there it is.
Howard said Scott Weiland went solo and he put out a song called Barbarella and he was listening to it. Howard said he thought it was a cool song. Howard said it's a bummer that all of these guys are dying. Howard said he liked the tribute David Byrne did for Bowie at the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame thing. Howard said he did a Bowie song and it as really good. Howard said the guy can still sing and he's no spring chicken. Howard said he has all grey hair now. Howard said he looks like Fred.
Fred played Scott Weiland singing that Barbarella song on their show. Howard asked Fred to play the studio version of it. He was annoyed by the banging on the desk sound. Fred played the song and the drum track was just as annoying as the desk banging. Howard said he loves that song.
Robin said the Goo Goo Dolls put out a new album and their single is great. Howard said he's not aware of the song. Robin said she heard it on The Pulse this weekend. Howard asked what channel that is. Robin said it's like 14 or 15. Howard said he likes that they have so many channels there.
Howard said that frank would be rolling in his grave over this. Gary came in with some more information about the story. He said that Ahmet and Diva Zappa are running the estate. Howard said he hates that they're not getting along. Gary said he thinks frank would be upset too. Howard said Frank speaks to him at night like God speaks to Jerry Fallwell and those guys.
Howard said he likes this country guy Chris Stapleton. Howard said he's good. He said he doesn't want to call himself a fan. He said that when he sees these country guys he doesn't put their music on. Howard said he might have to play this guy's stuff. Howard said his album won the best Country Grammy. Fred said Howard might like this one. He said he might not like all of it but 50 percent he might like. Howard said he did a great Prince tribute. Howard said he still thinks Adam Levine's tribute is the best. Fred played some of Chris Stapleton singing some Prince ''Nothing Compares 2 U''.
Robin asked about the Saturday Night Live tribute to Prince. Howard said he never performed any hits on Saturday Night Live. Howard said he wouldn't way it was a great tribute. Howard said Jimmy Fallon told a funny story about Prince on his show. Howard said Prince was going to come on his show and Prince got in touch with the guy from the Roots and told him to meet him at Susan Sarandon's ping pong club. Howard said Questlove told Prince that Jimmy's wife was having a baby that day so he can't go. Jimmy ended up going the next night and played ping pong with Prince. He said Jimmy tells this story about going to play and Prince is behind a curtain and Prince says ''Lets do this.'' Prince was kicking his ass because Jimmy doesn't know how to play. Howard said on the last shot the ball nicks the table and Jimmy goes and tries to pick the ball up and Prince is gone. Howard said it's such a great story. He said that guy could play his ass off. He said he was just so good. Howard said even with all of those dick moves. Howard said he had no ability to edit out the crap from the good stuff but the good stuff was so good it didn't matter.
Gary came in and said that Prince must have been really into ping pong because he read that he played against Michael Jackson once too. Howard said he played against a kid when he was younger and he jumped up to hit the ball and his head went through the basement ceiling. Howard went to break after that.
Howard took a call from a woman who said that she loves Prince but please tell people to stop with the purple balloons. Howard said he's with her on that. Howard said he hates balloons. Howard said the balloons should be outlawed. Howard said they end up getting into the wildlife and killing them. Howard and the caller talked about how Mylar doesn't degrade. It lasts forever. Howard let the Partyman song play a little bit. Howard said he should have been on their show.
The caller said she got to meet Prince years ago. She said she knew the security guard and he came walking into the room with little white booties and pajamas on. Howard asked if he was gay. Robin said she's only heard stories about him being with women. Howard asked if the caller had sex with him. She said she did not. She said she was in his fan club and he was one of the first musicians to have a web site and it cost you $300 and you'd get into private performances with like 75 people.
Howard asked if he can go now. The caller said she had one more question. She asked if he lets the cats in the room with him when he paints. Howard said sometimes but then he kicks them out because they can annoy him. Howard said they all come piling in. Howard said he needs some alone time from the cats. The caller started to talk about cats and Howard said he had enough of her and hung up on her. Howard said she needs a hobby.
Howard said she was ruining Prince for him. Howard said he really doesn't know this version of Partyman. Howard said he probably has 75 other versions of the song. Robin wondered who is going to be in charge of his music. Howard said the sister probably. Robin said they say there's a secret Prince love child so maybe not.
Robin said that Howard still hasn't done a tribute to Chyna yet. Howard said she came on their show many times. Howard said after the WWF she did reality TV and then got into porn after that. Howard said she had to change her name and battled drug abuse for years. Howard said she was on a graduate of the University of Tampa. Howard said she had many jobs over the years too. Howard read about some of those things. Howard said her real name was Joanie Laurer. Howard said she was 5'10'' and weighed 180 pounds. She could bench 350 pounds. Howard said she called herself the 9th wonder of the world and Nicole Bass claims she stole that from her.
Howard said that they met her in 1999 when she was on the show promoting her Playboy layout. Howard played a clip from the show when she was on back then. Howard said she came in very excited once and claimed the guy who was with her was her brother and they wrote a song together. Howard said she performed the song ''Holiday'' together and it became very popular on the show. Howard played some of that performance of ''Holiday'' on the show. Howard said he heard that and all he could think was the guitar was out of tune or she was out of tune. Howard said there seemed to be no preparation there. Robin said it was pretty shocking.
Howard said Chyna came in on her next appearance and she laughed about that song ''Holiday.'' Howard played some audio of her laughing at that performance. Chyna was cracking up laughing over that whole thing.
Howard said she was a great guest. Howard played another clip of Chyna talking about bursting an implant while wrestling.
Howard said she was on reality TV on The Surreal Life and on Celebrity Rehab. Howard said she did some acting in some straight to DVD stuff. Howard said she claimed that Anna Nicole Smith came on to her in one interview. Howard played some of that interview.
Howard said then Chyna got into porn. Howard said she talked about getting her asshole licked in one interview. Howard played some of that interview too. Howard said they used that interview to do the opposite of masturbation.
Howard said Chyna had a job of teaching English to Chinese people. Howard said they used some of that to make a classic phony phone call. Howard played the phony phone call. Howard said she was a great guest.
Howard said they tried to tell Gary the Conqueror that Chyna died. Howard played the call that Sal made to Gary telling him about it. Gary thought the whole country of China died. Gary was asking where his money is. Howard said he must be hanging out with Jackie Martling if he's asking for money.
Howard said they are taking Chyna's brain to study it for the effects of concussions. Howard said the family is giving her brain to science. He said he's not making a joke either. Howard said he's going to do that with Benjy. He said he has to know what's going on there. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read about a woman who gave birth to kids through two different wombs. Robin said she had two uteruses. Robin said she is 31 years old and she gave birth to two kids. Robin said when she was about 14 she was told she had two of everything down there. Howard said Benjy has 3 assholes. Robin said that the woman has two of everything and she must have gotten both pregnant. Howard asked if this has ever happened before. Robin said it must be a rare situation. Howard said he has a hard time satisfying just one vagina. He said two would be too much. Howard said he barely has one penis.
Robin read about Jared Fogle who is writing to some old girlfriends. Robin said he has a sentencing appeal coming up and he is writing to old girlfriends asking them for pictures and asking them to return to be in his life. Howard said that guy is hornier than Ronnie. Howard said you'd think being in jail would slow him down. Howard said that guy lost weight eating Subway and he made millions off of that. Howard said he's a douche bag. Howard said he had it made. Howard asked how old this guy is. Robin said he must be about 50. Howard said he's on fire with that penis of his. Robin said Jared is blaming the guy who ran his foundation for his problems. Robin said he's not really showing any remorse for what he did.
Robin read about ISIS publishing a list of New Yorkers that they're targeting. Robin said that Howard could be on that list. Robin said they're just naming New Yorkers. Robin said they have a list with over 3000 names on it. Howard said Gary and Sal aren't on that list because they look like terrorists.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked if Howard has read up on Gary Johnson at all because he's for abortion and for people having guns. The caller said he's seeking the Libertarian nomination. Howard said they're for smaller government but then they're upset when the roads don't get fixed and things like that. Howard said it seems like a waste when you vote for someone like that. He said he'd be one of his 5 votes. Howard said lets not waste time on this. He let the caller go and did a live commercial read.
Robin read a story about the present's daughter being accepted at Harvard. Robin said she's delaying it until after her father is done in the White House. Howard said he used to think ''don't waste time'' but he thinks Harvard encourages this life experience thing. Howard said he's sure her dad will have her doing something there. Robin said it's probably great to be at the White House meeting people. Howard said he should start charging her rent. Howard said he bets she's a go getter and she'll be doing something instead of sitting around listening to pieces of vinyl. Howard said she has to work. He said she can't just sit around. Gary asked Howard how he feels about kids traveling for a year. Howard said he's against that. He said it's a waste of time. Howard said when you're in your 20s you should be building to be an expert at something. He said you should use that youthful energy to learn something. Howard said don't travel. Howard said just get to work and forget the gap year. Howard said Memet traveled for a year and learned nothing. He said he should have been there learning something. Howard said Benjy did the same thing. Benjy said he had several gap years. Gary said he's dealing with this now and parents think this is a year for their kids to mature. Howard said they should go to summer camp during the high school years to do that. Howard said college is supposed to be your 4 gap years.
Robin read a story about a dad who wanted to discipline his son and made a video about what he's going to do. Robin had the clip for Howard to play. In the clip the guy said that his son walked out of class and he didn't call him. He said it's time for discipline. They ended up boxing. The kid ends up crying as the dad is beating the shit out of him. Howard said that's awful. Howard asked if the authorities took the kid away. Robin said they did not. Gary said he just read the kid has been taken out of the house by social services. He's only 17. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin had Howard play the new Goo Goo Dolls song she was talking about earlier in the show. Howard played some of the song he had but it wasn't the one Robin was thinking of. Robin had Howard play another one. Robin said that's not it either. Robin had Howard play another song. Robin said that's it. It was ''So Alive.'' Robin said she loves that. Robin said he whole album drops on May 6. Howard said they know those guys so he's glad to hear they made a good song.
Robin read about Prince dying and having no known will. Howard said he probably had an idea of where he wanted his estate to go and now it's up in the air. Robin said that his sister Tika Nelson asked the court to step in. Robin said he had no known children or parents who could inherit it. Robin said she heard about a secret love child who could get it though. That led to Howard and Fred talking about what a great guitarist Prince was.
Robin read a story about a woman who is suing Starbucks for $5 million because they put so much ice in their coffee. Howard said if you're that bothered by it then just don't go there.
Howard said he heard Robin knocked over the coffee maker in the kitchen there. Robin said she knew that it was messed up. Robin said she didn't want coffee. She wanted a can of seltzer. Howard said they had police tape up. Robin said they did not. Ronnie said it was roped off. Howard said they have a surveillance camera in there. Ronnie said there's a sign saying the kitchen is closed and they blocked off the door. Robin said she just walked up and there was a coffee thing in the middle. Ronnie said he was standing there talking to Becca and then he hears this crash. He said Robin came running in asking if someone could help her. He said the coffee machine was on the floor and coffee was all over the floor. Howard said he wants to see the surveillance footage. He said it was roped off. Gary said even if it wasn't there the lights were off and the sign was up. Ronnie said the coffee machine was up against the door so Robin moved it and tried to get into where the seltzer was. Howard asked if she got that. Robin said yes. Ronnie said she wanted to pick it up. Ronnie said there was no way they were picking it up. Howard said she got an email telling her not to go in there.
Howard said he wants to see the surveillance. Howard checked it out and you can see the way they blocked it off. Robin insisted it wasn't there. Robin said she wouldn't have walked under that. She said she got the email and she knew not to be in there. Howard said there are some guys with white jackets out there to take her away.
Robin read about Kid Rock having a problem at his estate. Robin said his assistant crashed an ATV and he was killed. Robin said Kid Rock and his girlfriend found the body and made a 911 call. Howard said he would never ride an ATV. Howard played a clip of the 911 operator talking to Kid Rock and Kid Rock is telling her that his Polaris is off the side of his driveway and his assistant appears to be dead. The operator was asking if he was awake or not. Kid Rock and his girlfriend kept telling her that he looked dead.
Robin read a story about Ted Cruz talking about Donald Trump getting the support of Mike Tyson who is a convicted rapist. Robin had audio of Cruz talking about that. Robin had some audio of Bernie Sanders talking about Hillary Clinton and Clinton talking about Sanders.
Robin read a story about Senator Chuck Schumer talking about how electronic billboards can track people on their cell phones. Howard said he likes that. He said track him all you want. Robin had some audio of Schumer talking about that. Robin wrapped up and Howard ended the show around 11:20am.
Jon asked Don if metalheads respect Prince. Don said that they do. He said social media is flooded with everyone talking about how great Prince was. He said they're praising him about what a great guitarist he was.
Jon said that it's rare when someone's death affects. Howard this much. He said he's raved about Prince for a long time. Gary said when they got to K-Rock the first year they were a rock station. He said their program director brought them the new song ''Kiss'' from Prince and they played it at the end of the show and they got pissed at Howard saying he can't do that because they were a rock station. Gary said Howard didn't care and played it.
Jon asked about the archive Prince had and how he was constantly recording 24/7. Michael said he was constantly doing that. He said that one of the arguments he had with Warner Brothers was that he wanted to put out too much music. He wanted to put an album out every 6 months. He said he had more than 400 songs recorded when he left and now he's apparently got thousands.
Gary said in the 80s here were some shitty Hendrix songs coming out. He said that there might be 5 great albums left if they can put an album out a year. He said they can't all be great.
Don said he respects the fact that he was relentlessly putting albums out. Gary said he heard that every room in the house was mic'd and they could record in every room so he could just start singing and go record it.
Michael told more stories about working with Prince and George Michael back in the day. They went to break after that.
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Gary said Howard loved Prince so much that they were talked into having Diamond and Pearl on the show. Gary said that's how they generated press on that record. Michael explained how all of that worked back then. He also told the guys about Prince changing his name to a unpronounceable symbol. Michael said he was instructed to tell people about this symbol and he had to take it seriously.
Don asked how they introduced Prince with that symbol. Michael said they never really said ''Prince'' so they used he or him.
Jon took a call from a guy who said it's great to hear Howard talking about Prince. He said that skit with Ronnie and Nicole Bass today was great too.
Jon said Nicole always has a great sense of humor about herself but it's always a sad story. Gary said he asked her to smile today and it was a really sad smile. He said whenever she comes in Fred does that voice and it makes him laugh every time.
Gary said Nicole used to talk about how she was a body builder. He said one day they had Arnold Schwarzenegger on the show and Nicole was in the hall. When he walked into the hall he saw her and knew who she was. He said the whole thing is just fascinating with her. He said her tits are enormous. Jon said that Nicole was standing there topless for half of the interview.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he was in the gym this morning and he almost killed himself 3 times hearing the Nicole Bass thing today. He asked what the reaction was in the back office while it was going on. Jon said they didn't know how to react. He said he saw JD run out. Gary said it sounded just like a strip club because they were all talking over one another. Don asked if she really had nipple rings in. Gary said she did. Don asked if that's supposed to make her more feminine. The guys weren't sure about that.
The caller, John from Maryland, asked Gary about going to the White House Correspondents' Dinner and if the room was shocked when Larry Wilmore said the N-word. Gary asked if he watched the whole night. John said he did. Gary said he thinks the worst part that Larry had to deal with was that Obama comes out at 10 and he was brilliant. He said Obama did 40 minutes and he was killing. He said everyone wants to leave after that. He said it's not the kind of room that his comedy would play well in. He said he likes watching a guy bomb and not be distracted by it. Gary said everyone was halfway to the door anyway so they didn't react to it that much.
Don said he has had to deal with that at he Comedy Cellar when Chris Rock comes in to do a set for 45 minutes working on material and he kills right before you have to go up. They spent a minute on that and then went to break.
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Jon said JD revealed during that segment that he attended the ballet with his girlfriend. He said he thinks he got off easy with that. Gary said he thinks that Howard has done some of that stuff with Beth too. He said that everyone does that. Don said he loves when they goof on JD. He said that was one moment when he was glad he got off light. He said people were coming to his defense. He said he liked that.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he thinks they're letting JD off the hook too easy. He said that he wants to know what they think about JD's half chub. Gary said Richard was the one who checked. Gary said he thinks JD is just at the age where he has a constant half chub. Jon said it may have just been the environment.
Jon took a call from a woman who said she was told a story about Prince where Eric Clapton was asked what it was like to be the best guitar player in the world and he said that the interviewer should ask Prince. Jon said a lot of people are saying now that he's the greatest but that wasn't always the case. Jon asked Michael if he thinks he was looked upon as a great guitar player or a great entertainer. Michael said he thinks that over in the UK he was really revered as a great musician.
Jon asked Don when people came around on Prince. Don said that they've always said it but people are coming out of the closet more now. They spent a few more minutes talking about Prince.
Jon took a call from a guy who said the whole Sal thing was great last week. He also said he was never really a fan of Prince until about 25 years ago. He said he was kind of surprised by his music and he got a whole new respect for him. He wondered if it was a curse for him that he always had to be playing. Michael said he wouldn't say it was a curse. He said he did have to play all the time but it wasn't a curse. Gary said he seemed to love playing music and that was pretty obvious. Don said the thing he'll remember about Prince was the time he played in the dark and how mad he got over that.
Jon got in some plugs and wrapped up the show. They were done around 12:05pm.
Howard started the show with Fred playing a bunch of people singing ''The Great American Nightmare.'' Howard said everyone is grabbing the mic at once. Howard said one at a time now. Fred played Robin singing and then JD, Mariann from Brooklyn and High Pitch Erik. Howard said they're all wonderful.
Howard said their announcer is going to be porn star August Taylor. He had her announcing who will be on the show while she was giving oral. She said Rob Reiner will be on today. Howard said he's every excited about that. He said he has many things to talk to him about. He said he knows a lot of stuff about him. Howard said he's going to bring his son Nick in with him too.
Howard said he spent all night monitoring TV. He said that he doesn't watch it, he monitors it. Howard said he tells Beth he's working. Howard said he was monitoring the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame last night. He said he enjoyed it. Howard said he has to throw up. Robin asked if he's still thinking about Nicole Bass. Howard asked if Jason posted the picture of him on the couch with her. Jason said they did. Howard said Nicole said she never had a picture with him. He said that's probably not true. Howard said she's just so big and sweaty.
Howard said it's such a passive aggressive thing to do. Howard said he's trying to get the next segment together. Howard said he just did the Nicole thing and he's trying to get his act together. Howard said she comes barreling over. He said they haven't been able to work it out so they can get a guest out of there. Howard said what happens is the mic goes off and Nicole is standing there so he thanks her for coming in. Then she comes barreling in and says he never took a picture with him in all these years. Howard said he asked her to put some clothes on and she goes out of the room. He said he complained to the guys. He said he did say he'd take one so he let her come back in. She asked to touch him when they were on the couch. Howard said he told her no when she asked if she could touch him. Robin was watching and said she was trying to be dainty and feminine. Howard said he was tired and didn't want to be touched. Howard said he's said no to other women who have been on the show too. He said he just wasn't in the mood.
Howard said they put the picture of Nicole up on the web site. Howard said she was a good sport. Howard said he was thinking about her last night and they do like her... from afar. Howard said they're not very social though. Howard said don't take it personally. Robin said she was running things. Howard said some people take over. Howard said it's very libertarian in there. Howard said he's like a one man band over there and he has to deal with her. Howard said Robin knew what was going on in here. She was sitting in there laughing through the glass.
Howard said Sal told him that Nicole was coughing all over his mic and it was covered in phlegm. Howard said he was thinking the best thing they can do to get guests out is pull the fire alarm. He said they can pull a fake one since doing the real thing wouldn't be cool.
Howard said Fred got a lot of accolades about him being Nicole yesterday. Fred played an alarm sound for the fire alarm plan. Howard said he has a clip of this guy Kerry Sanders doing a report outdoors and a boat horn goes off and drowns him out. Howard played the clip and the guy is doing a report when the horn sounds for a few seconds. Howard said he needs that for when Benjy talks. Howard asked Benjy to tell him who he's voting for and then had Fred play the boat horn sound.
Howard said Benjy is actually torn between the two candidates. Benjy said he thinks he leans more toward Trump. He said he doesn't like a lot of things he's said about people. He trusts him more politically though. Howard had Fred hit the horn.
Howard said he's for Trump. Benjy said that there are things he doesn't like that he's said though. Howard said he's torn but he's for Trump. Benjy said he's going to vote libertarian. Howard said that's a waste of a vote. Benjy said it's not. Fred played the boat horn more. Howard said he should have the boat horn sound. He said he knows when to hit it.
Howard said Kerry Sanders went to a gun range to do a report and this time there were people shooting as he was doing his report.
Howard said he was in a men's room in North Carolina when the same thing happened. Howard played a bit they put together where they had someone shitting over Kerry talking. Then they had another one where he did a report from a clock shop and the clocks all went off over him. Howard said they should have him get drowned out in every report.
Benjy started talking so Fred played gun shots over him. Howard asked Benjy why he's voting libertarian. Benjy started talking and Fred played gun shots and boat horn over him.
Howard said they have a Big Foot update too. Howard said they finally figured out what was wrong with him. He had a voicemail message about how it's his pancreas. Big Foot said he has pancreatitis. He said it's a very serious thing. Robin agreed and said that pancreatitis is very serious. She said it can cause a lot of problems.
Howard asked Benjy some more questions and Fred played the boat horn over him. Howard said he likes that. He said that's the new thing.
Benjy asked Howard about his therapy and how that's going. Howard said he had a break through. He said it's not just one thing he can tell them about. Howard said it's probably nothing. Howard said he's a miserable fuck. He said he's going to hit the horn on himself. Howard said the most amazing thing happened to him. He played the horn over himself as he was explaining it. Howard said it's probably the secret to life. Howard played the horn over himself as he told us the secret of life.
Howard said he has a High Pitch Erik update. Howard said he was in the hospital and had an operation. Howard said they had to open him up to check out his heart. Howard played a clip of Erik talking about the operation they did and how he made it through. Erik said they said he had no blockage in his heart. Erik is in good health according to Erik. Shuli asked if it was a wake up call for him. Erik said it was. He said he has to eat healthy.
Howard said Robin eats kale for 10 years and gets cancer and Erik is healthy. Robin said not really. He can't walk. Howard said Prince is gone but Erik is still there.
Howard said they called Underdog Lady and asked her about Prince dying. Howard played the clip of Shuli talking to her about that. Underdog said that she didn't listen to him much other than when she saw Batman. Underdog said she found it strange that he changed his name a few times. Howard said that's her Prince tribute.
Howard said he has a phony phone call to play before the commercial break. Howard said the other day he was complaining about the Khaleesi not getting naked. Howard said they took those clips and called an internet radio show with those clips. In the call Howard was talking about her not getting naked and he found his interest in her story line completely waned. One of the guys on the show agreed that she should be naked. One host said it was no problem for her. One woman said she's not sure why it's a tragedy. One guy said that he doesn't think their audience cares so much. Then they had Howard cursing and saying ''Fuck you all!'' They went to break after that.
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Howard said that ABC is going to do a bunch of game shows on Sunday nights during the summer. Howard said it should be interesting. Howard said they never had really famous people on the Match Game. Howard said they had people like Brett Summers on the show. He said she was Jack Klugman's wife. Howard said you started to care about her though. Howard said it's a good idea to do the game show thing. Howard said Alec is a talent and he should be a good fit.
Howard did his own hosting of a Match Game with Fred and Robin. Howard introduced Robin, Fred and Benjy. Fred played the boat horn over Benjy. Howard played the game with Fred, Robin and Benjy for a few seconds.
Howard said he thinks that this game show will be Alec's greatest accomplishment. Howard said he loved Gene Rayburn on the show. He said he had that skinny microphone that he used. Howard said no one ever used it after that. Howard said it looked like a pig erection. Howard said he saw one when he was younger. Robin said she watched Silicon Valley the other night and they had two horses going at it. Howard said he remembers seeing a woman blowing a horse once and it was crazy. Robin said that they had these two horses going at it on this show and it was wild.
Howard said yesterday FOX News put up a story about Obama's daughter taking a year off before going to college. Howard said they had to shut down the comments on the story because they got so racist. Howard said our world is so fucked up that they had to shut it down. Howard said Malia is going to college and did nothing wrong. Howard read some of the comments that made it through. They were really racist. Howard said even the Ku Klux Klan was offended by them.
Howard played some fake clips of Obama's jokes from the White House Correspondents dinner. They had him saying really inappropriate things. He was saying things about people at the part and about himself.
Howard said Bobo took a beating in the email yesterday. He said he has to read some of them to him. Howard got Bobo on the phone and said people just can't stand him. Howard asked if he can take hearing it. Bobo said he can take it. Howard read some of the email and one person said people are voting for another Bobo Free Summer. Howard read a few like that.
Howard asked if Bobo really wants to try to ask a question today. Bobo said he has two golden questions so he does. Howard said people have had it with him. Bobo said he has two that are the best. Howard told him to go with the one best he has. Bobo asked Howard if he had to put in order his top 5 announcements what would they be. Bobo said maybe leaving terrestrial radio would be number 1. Howard asked what's going on there. Howard said he's going to forget that one and go to the second best. Howard said he's afraid this is it. Bobo said he thinks that's a good one. They played a song parody about Bobo's awful calls.
Howard said he's going to suggest that everyone forget about the first question. He said they'll forget that and now find out what Bobo has to ask. Bobo asked if Howard feels talking on the mic into the darkness is easier for him than being in a social situation. Howard played another song parody about Bobo's awful calls and how they should hang up on Bobo. Howard laughed. Howard said he thinks he should spend the day reflecting and come up with something good. Howard said he's said that a million times that he's more comfortable on radio than he is in social situations. Howard asked what he's talking about. Bobo was about to explain but Robin told him not to explain.
Howard asked Bobo if it would be better to call in every other day and really craft a question that's interesting. Howard said he should be free to just be a listener. Bobo said it's hard. Howard said he wants the spotlight. Bobo said this is like his heroin. He said ask any superfan and that's what it is. Howard asked Fred what the question was. Fred did his Bobo impression and asked the question about talking into the darkness. Howard played another song parody about Bobo's bad questions. Howard said take a few days off and call in next week. Howard said this was worse than yesterday's call.
Howard said Bobo has to pace himself and really work out the question. He said maybe try it out on a few people. He said get some feedback about it. Fred said that they got an email already asking for a Bobo Free Lifetime. Howard said Bobo should take 10 days off and come up with a question. Bobo said he has to call in every day. Howard played another song parody about Bobo.
Bobo said he has been trained to speak to large crowds. He said people have a fear of people. Bobo said if Howard had to speak on the mic he thinks he'd be more comfortable. Howard asked Bobo how long he's been listening to the show. Bobo said it's like 30 years. Howard said he knows he's said this many times that he's not comfortable in front of crowds. Howard said he knows the answer to his question. Howard asked why he would ask it. Bobo said he just wrote it up different. Howard said it's quality over quantity. Robin said he has a whole notebook filled with questions and that's the best he had. Bobo said he has a ton of stuff.
Howard said what he'll do with Bobo is open the book and pull out a random question. Fred suggested burning the fucking book. Howard said his idea might be better. Fred said he asks questions he knows the answers to and he never asks anything interesting or controversial.
Bobo found a question and asked if Howard has to put together the ''most scariest'' moments on the show, what would they be? Howard said he lost him when he said ''most scariest''. Howard said that's some question. Fred did his impression of Bobo again. Howard said he sees why the fans get turned off. Howard said he doesn't have good questions. They played another song parody about Bobo.
Howard asked Bobo what his top 5 stupidest questions are that he's asked on the Howard Stern Show. Howard told him to go home and they won't even count this phone call. Howard said he can go home and really craft his questions. Bobo said he might have to do current event questions. Howard said maybe he needs a coach. He said the question is if they should cut this out of the replays. Howard played Bobo off with another song parody. They went to break after that.
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Howard said he has a phony phone call to play. Howard asked what would happen if Michael Caine called a talk show and talked about the Khaleesi. Howard said they had one earlier talking about the Khaleesi and now this one. Howard played the call the guys made with fake Michael Caine audio clips. They had Caine talking about the Khaleesi and how he wants to see her titties. He said he was stroking his penis once when she was topless but then they cut to the midget right as he came. The host of the show eventually had to hang up on him.
Howard said imagine a 7 day a week show that no one hears. He said they called that show back and gave them names to announce for birthdays. Howard said they wrote in names like Rusty Trombone, Shave Her Beave, Clitoris, Diddle My Crack and Jack Off and she said all of them. Howard said they gave her one that was like Harry Penis but it was spelled ''Harry P. Nits.'' Howard played the audio of the same woman giving the shout outs to all of those names. Howard replayed the clip and went through each one as she read them. Howard said it's so stupid. He said they spelled Finger Bang ''Finn Gerbang.'' Howard said that's a grand slam of stupid. He said he's the President of the United States of Stupid right now. Howard said they have dedicated a lifetime of work to doing that stuff.
Howard had Memet come in to talk about the cuddle party. Howard said it costs like 25 bucks to attend and they have mats on the floor for people to lay on. Memet said the people there are even stranger than they are at a sex party. Howard said there are some really sad guys who can't even cuddle. Howard said that the guys must think they're gong to get sex there. Memet said the girls don't care about the sex part but all of the guys are thinking about the sex part.
Howard said that these people are looking for any kind of physical contact and the girls are just nuts. Howard asked if there are good looking women there. Memet said there are some. He said they're not heinous. Memet said he thinks that they're ''damaged'' but some are pretty.
Howard said Benjy has all kinds of crust on his face. Benjy said he has dry skin. Howard asked to look at his face. He said that he has something going on there. Benjy said it's just dry skin. Benjy said he'll start moisturizing. Howard said he did that once and he broke out. Robin said she uses it every day so it's fine to do that. Howard said Benjy is looking better lately. He said he sees him posting pictures on Facebook all the time.
Howard got back to Memet and asked him about this cuddle party. Memet said it was there in the city. Howard thanked a guy named Adam for letting them interview people.
Howard played a clip of Memet talking to a strange sounding guy talking about why he was there. Memet asked if he had been told no at all that night. The guy said he had one lady say no to him. Memet said you show up and here are mats on the floor. He said they say you're just there for the emotional part. Howard said that they ask if they would cuddle with a man and they say no. He said they say it's not about sex but it obviously is. That guy said it's not a sexual thing but he won't go to an all male cuddle party. Howard said he would never go to a cuddle party. Howard said even in his worst day he wouldn't do that.
Memet said that this thing goes on for hours. He said they spoon like they're been in a relationship for years. Howard played another interview that Memet did with a woman who carries around a blanket with her. She said it's something that's always stuck with her so she carries it around with her.
Howard played another clip of a guy talking about why he was there and saying that he's a good cuddle. Memet said you have to wear sweat pants there so if you get a boner it's obvious. Memet said they say that there is no shame in getting one if you do. Howard played more of the audio of Memet talking to the guy and asking if he would cuddle with a man. That guy said not on his first day.
Howard played a clip of a woman saying she had a connection there and she felt like it was something she had with a person for 5 years. Howard said he can't think of anything worse than laying there with a hard on and not being able to do anything. Howard said he did that when he was young and it was torture. Howard said he'd rather get some sleep.
Robin asked if Memet had to try it out. Memet said he did. He said that he hadn't been laid in a while and he was worried that something would happen. He said there were some good looking girls there. The one with the blankie was cute. He said he thinks he could bang her but not date her. Memet said he thinks a girl who has a blankie is wild in bed.
Howard played another interview Memet did with a woman about the cuddling. Memet said some of these people were paid by the hour to cuddle. Howard said they had that on America's Got Talent. Howard said they're professional cuddlers. Howard said someone told him that Memet was talking about how great it was that the girl with the blankie was damaged. Memet said he doesn't remember saying that.
Howard asked if anyone hooked up there. Memet said he's sure there were some connections made. He said there were girls letting guys cuddle them pretty good. Robin asked if you have just one or several. Memet said it's like a cuddle orgy. He said you have to get verbal consent from the person though. Howard asked if anyone smelled bad. Memet said he doesn't remember any. Howard said you know there must have been some.
Howard asked why Memet isn't getting laid. He also asked about the tattoo he had removed from his chest. Memet said it's so stupid so he won't say what it was. He said it's really expensive to get it removed. He said it's 10 sessions and it costs about as much as the tattoo each time he goes. Howard asked what it was. Will came in and showed Howard what it was. It was some kind of military tattoo. Memet said he just wants it gone. He said it's so stupid. He said it's like an American Eagle. Memet said he just wants it gone. Howard asked if he's depressed. Memet said probably a little bit.
Howard asked if he's not leaving his apartment. Memet said he is staying in. He said he tried getting back on dating apps but he's not having luck. He said he had a match on one site and he was matched with a 400 pound woman and a dude. He said he got involved with some crazy chicks too. He said things just aren't working.
Howard asked about Memet walking around with a stress grip. Memet said he has a lot of stress. Howard said he's a good looking guy and he should be out there getting laid. Howard asked why he's getting rid of that tattoo. Memet said it's a long story and it's embarrassing. Howard said he'll hook him up with Robin if he wants. Robin said she won't even cuddle with him. She was just kidding. Robin said that it won't work out well because they have to see each other every day.
Will brought in the pictures of the matches Memet had on that dating app. Howard said one is a guy dressed as a woman. Howard said the other is an obese woman. Memet said the other one was just a picture of an ass and they say that it's a 90 percent match. Howard let him go after that.
Howard brought up the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame after hearing Fred pay Steve Miller's ''Space Cowboy.'' Howard talked about some of the performances on the induction show. Howard said Sheryl Crow did a tribute to Glenn Frey with another girl and it was great. Howard said it was a pretty good show. Gary said the other woman was Grace Potter. Howard said she's good. Howard asked if Sheryl used to go out with Kid Rock. Robin said they did a song together.
Howard mentioned the band Chicago and their song ''25 or 6 to 4'' so Fred played some of that. Howard said Rob Reiner is coming in next. Howard said they have a time line of incredible projects that his family did. Howard said they'll take a break and then get to Rob. They went to break after playing a couple of song parodies and bits.
Howard came back and said that Rob Reiner is there. Howard said he's one of the greatest talents ever. Howard said he has to soak it in as he's coming in. Robin said he lost some weight. Rob said he did. He said you just eat a little less. He said it's hard. rob said the problem at his age is needing to stand a certain way when you pee. He said now he's using both hands. He said it's really tragic.
Howard asked if he feels like he's getting old. Rob said he's happy if there's no pain during his day. Howard asked if he thinks about how he's going to die. Rob said his wife takes care of that. He said she's afraid of people dropping dead immediately. Howard said the nice part about looking back on your life is seeing that you've proven yourself. Howard said he doesn't think he'd want to go back in time. Rob said when you get older you don't give a shit anymore. He said it allows you to do whatever you want to do.
Howard said it would be much harder to get into the business now. Rob said it would. He said he's made like 125 movies with Castle Rock. He said that none of them would be made today with the other studios. Rob said the studios make movies that have man and a number in the title. He said it's Iron Man and Spider-Man and all of that. Rob said he's been very lucky with the movies he's made. He said he has people who step up and give him money. He said that everyone is scrounging around.
Howard said Rob has put out a string of movies that are amazing. He said he's done every genre. Howard said he still has to figure out how to get money. Rob said that humbles you. Rob said he respects Howard because he's carved out a niche for himself and it's the biggest niche ever. Howard said it is crazy.
Howard said he projects the father son thing into his career. He said Rob's dad is Carl Reiner and he picked this career to be in the business and people treat him like ''don't do that'' because his father is so great. Howard said they think it's going to be nepotism. Rob said he didn't take any money from him. He said he knew he was going to get that stuff. He said they still talk about it to this day. Rob said he knew what he had done and he knew the truth.
Howard said the person who recognized his talent was Norman Lear. He said Norman told his dad that he was funny at 9. Howard said he saw him on All in the Family and thought about his dad. He said he didn't get that because of his dad though. Rob said he had two auditions before that. He said it was crazy that the show got on the air at all. Rob said they had an incredible disclaimer at the start of the show that basically said don't watch the show.
Howard said Rob's father created The Dick Van Dyke Show. Howard said that stuff alone is genius. Howard said Rob grabbed Mary's ass on the set. Rob said he was 14 years old and she was like 25 walking around in those Capri pants. He said he just went and grabbed. Howard asked if his father told him it was inappropriate. Rob said his dad called him into the office and asked if he did it. He said he did and his dad with a big smile said don't do that anymore. Rob said Mary used to go ''Oh Rob'' on the show. He said years later he had done a lot of movies and shows and they were doing a reunion for Mary's show. He said he told the cameraman to keep rolling. He walked up to her and apologized to her for what he did. He said that she was so beautiful and he would still do it. He said she bent over and stuck her tush out and he grabbed her and she did the ''Oh Rob'' thing for him.
Howard said Mary was so beautiful back then. Rob said it was confusing to him. He said they had people like Anne Bancroft come to the house. He said these beautiful women would be around. Howard said he didn't have anyone like that around his house. He said they had some women who were okay. Howard said if he grabbed a woman's ass at 14 these days he'd be put right in jail.
Howard said it's such a crazy world that he grew up in. He said it can be intimidating for someone at that age. Rob said he used to watch his dad work with the actors and all of that. He studied all of that. Rob said he felt like he wanted to be competitive with his dad. He said his dad wrote 20-25 scripts ad year on his own. He said he looked at it and wondered how he was going to do that. Howard said his dad would just bang it out. Rob said he knew his dad was having struggles with ideas because he'd come into his room and ask if anything interesting happened that day in school.
Howard said he would be filled with angst if he was him. Rob said he was. He said his dad and Mel Brooks were going to do the Ed Sullivan show and he came up with an idea for a joke. He said he was terrified to pitch it to his dad and Mel. He said they actually used it on the show and that was the greatest thrill. Howard said if you get smacked down it must be horrible.
Howard said Rob was a writer before ''All in the Family.'' Howard said in high school Rob took an acting class in his senior year. Howard said Richard Dreyfus and Albert Brooks were in the class with him. Howard asked if he saw signs of brilliance with them. Rob said he did. He said that Albert was like a comedy prodigy. He said he could make seasoned professionals laugh. He said that he did a routine that put his father away. He said this was at their house. He said that Albert said he was the greatest escape artist of all time. He said he took a napkin and told them to drape it over his hands. He said he went behind a curtain and tried to get out. He said he was saying ''I can't breathe'' from behind a curtain and his dad was gone.
Rob said that Joey Bishop had a shelf full of awards and Albert came in as they were showing them off. Albert said something about them wanting all of them back by noon.
Howard asked if there's room for a normal childhood. He said that he senses that he had to be on all the time. Rob said there was that. He said he couldn't compete with Albert Brooks. He said that he would start and they'd just let him go. He said people would scream after he'd do his thing. Rob said one day he did his thing and left the party. He said Albert called about 20 minutes later and said he left his keys in the apartment and asked him to bring them to him. Howard said he feels like he knows Rob because he had so many people like that around him.
Howard said there has to be jealousy around when his father is working with Steve Martin. Rob said there was. He said he had a different relationship with his father but he would have loved to have had that. Howard asked if he went to therapy for that. Rob said of course he did. He said this moment right now is the only time he's not in therapy. Howard said there has to be pressure there. He said it's a constant thing. Howard said anyone who has worked on a TV show has that. Howard said it's like you can't breathe. Rob said it wasn't until he was doing Stand by Me that he started feeling himself. He said that it was a long time before he carved out his own identity.
Howard asked Rob about being the third host of Saturday Night Live. Rob said the pressure was off of him for that show. He said he had to fight for Albert on the show. He said he did short films and one was 13 minutes long about him wanting to be a doctor. Rob said it was a 13 minute film and he didn't want to break it up. He said Lorne didn't want to do it because it was a live show. He said they broke it up with a commercial and they actually did it. He said this was the early days of Saturday Night Live. He said they had everything going on. He said they cut sketches while the show was going on. He said in those days they had to do that. They don't do that today though.
Howard said that first cast was brilliant. Howard said Aykroyd and Belushi were amazing. Howard said Rob had all of those guys in his life. Rob said it was a fun time. He said he had a house that was like an open house. He said whoever wanted to come over would come over.
Howard said Rob was with Penny Marshall and that must have been a fun time. Rob said they had a lot of laughs. He said you kind of grow out of that youth thing.
Howard asked Rob about joining a summer theater group after high school. Howard said then he forms a comedy duo with Larry Bishop. Rob said they had an improv group first but then they broke away. Howard said Larry said to him that he didn't want to do it anymore. Rob said they got booked into the Hungry Eye and they were opening for a great jazz singer. He said they were young guys but they were good. He said they got great reviews. He said after that night Larry said he didn't want to do it anymore. He was Joey Bishop's son and he didn't want do to that kind of thing. Rob said he was ready to go.
Howard said Rob worked on the Smothers Brothers show. Rob said Tommy came to him and he hired him to write. He said they stayed on to write with the Smothers Brothers. He said he was writing with Steve Martin. Howard said he and Steve are the young guys on the show. Rob said they couldn't get anything on the air. He said they did get the first fart joke on the air though. He said Pat Paulson was the president of a novelty company and at one point he sits down and you hear a fart. He said he thinks there's a Whoopi cushion there and he gets up and there isn't one there.
Howard asked Rob about working with Steve Martin and if he was shocked at how big he got. Rob said he was amazing and he was huge. Rob said the guy is brilliant. He said he's funny and a great musician and a great writer. Rob said that he really is a renaissance man. Howard said he's gotten to know him a little bit. He said he's just funny all the time. He said it's great that Rob didn't crack when his dad was working with him. Rob said he could never do what Steve did. Howard said that movie ''The Jerk'' was something big. He said it was different for his father to do. Rob said he had a small part in the movie actually. He said he picks Steve up as a hitchhiker and only drives him 10 feet.
Howard asked Rob if he had to audition for All in the Family. Rob said he did. He said there were two sets of Mike and Glorias before they got hired. rob said the first two were done for ABC and then switched to CBS. Howard asked if he was floored when it took off. Rob said he was. He said they felt like they were playing for the band. He said they knew it was a good show but they didn't think anyone would accept the show. They figured it would be 13 weeks and they'd be off the air. He said things were so crazy he couldn't go out in public. He said that it was great at first but then it gets old.
Howard said what's funny is that he did Spinal Tap after that and it was like he had to reinvent himself. Rob said you see crossover to movie and TV all the time these days but back then you couldn't make that transition. He said that there were people who did it but it was very hard for him to do it.
Howard asked Rob if it's fatiguing to have to say no to people who ask for jobs. Rob said he didn't have to in the beginning. He said he found people he knew and worked with them. Howard said Billy Crystal is a great comic. Howard said Robin Williams and Billy kind of took away from each other when they worked together. Rob said that's what it was like with Albert Brooks. He said that Robin was the force and Billy knew what to do.
Howard said that Rob did Spinal Tap and it was so brilliant. He said it wasn't a big hit at first but it became a cult hit. Rob said people didn't get it at first. He said they had no idea what it was. He said that they previewed it in Dallas and people asked why they would make a documentary about a band no one knew of. Rob said he had to tell them it was satire. Rob said that he had a guy who shot documentaries and he didn't get it. He though it was real.
Rob said Albert Brooks did something that taught him a big lesson. He said he did routines on TV that he didn't even try out in clubs. He said he did a routine where he plays a mime and he walks out on stage and never stops talking. He said no laughs for that. Howard said a lot of people don't get him. Rob said two weeks later he gets called back to do Carson again. He said he was going to do the mime piece on the show even though no one laughed. He said he did the exact same bit but this time Carson saw it and he started laughing. He said Carson fell off his chair laughing and the audience got it after that. Rob said that taught him a lesson that you have to stick with what you think is funny.
Howard said that Billy Crystal played a mime in Spinal Tap. He said he talked in that part. Howard said then the next movie is ''The Sure Thing.'' Howard said that was a great one too. Howard said it's one of his favorites. Howard said he didn't want John Cusack for that role. Rob said it came down to 4 people. He said it was Robert Downey Jr., Nicholas Cage and Andrew McCarthy who were up for the role. He said that Cusack had a sweetness to him that he wanted for the movie.
Howard said then comes Stand By Me. Howard said that's when Rob comes into his own. Howard said this is the most incredible role in a career. Howard said he must have had every studio wanting to work with him. Rob said that this is what he liked to do marrying humor and drama. He said now he's thinking that he wants to do Princess Bride. He said that has everything he wants to do. He said the studio said they would do whatever he wants. He didn't think they actually would. He said anything but that.
Howard said they had a lot of people who tried to make that movie and they all failed at it. Rob said it is a very oddball mixture of things. Howard said the next movie is ''When Harry Met Sally.'' Howard said Rob is on a roll. He said that he gets no Academy Awards. He asked if he cared about that. Rob said he learned an odd thing. He said when All in the family was on he was nominated a bunch of times. He said he'd always lose to Ed Asner. He said he lost and people would come up to him saying they're so sorry. He said he was one of the 5. He said he's not going to accept what they're saying to him.
Howard asked if he ever prepared a speech for that. Rob said he never has. He said that he likes to see what comes out of his mouth. He gets nervous before but he learned from his dad that you just take what you're given and take it from there. He said you can choke but you just do it. Rob said Howard is listening to him right now and what he says will trigger what Howard is going to ask next.
Howard said When Harry Met Sally was nominated but Rob wasn't. Howard asked if that bothers him. Rob said no it doesn't. Rob said that when Castle Rock started that was the first movie they did. He said if that movie had tanked they would have been done. Howard said Castle Rock produced ''Seinfeld.'' Rob said they did another show called Past and Perfect. He said Jerry auditioned for that and they hired Howie Mandel. He said George Shapiro said Jerry had an idea for a show and they heard that idea and went with it. Howard asked if they act out scenes or just talk about the tone of the show. Rob said they talked about what they wanted to do with the show. He said they knew Jerry and Larry David and they told them about the show and went with it. Howard said they did 4 shows initially and it didn't do well. Rob said they knew they had a great show. He said they had one show where they're waiting for a table at a Chinese restaurant. He said that it was a show about nothing. He said that they were going to take it off. Rob said he went in and begged Brandon Tartikoff. He said that he said it will be one of the great shows they've ever had. Howard said today they would never let that happen.
Howard said ''When Harry Met Sally'' was big but it was risky putting Billy Crystal in the lead for a love interest. Rob said he had gone to other guys before Billy. He said Billy was his good friend and he knew he could do it. He said Billy nailed it. He said he contributed a lot too. He said he contributed that line ''I'll have what she's having.''
Howard said Rob did ''Misery'' too. Howard said that's another fascinating story. Howard said James Caan was born for that role. Rob said they went through a bunch of others before James. He said people were worried about him but he was fine. He said that was interesting because he loves thrillers. He said the pressure of doing something and trying to move away from it is what that movie is all about. He said that was a Steven King thing. Howard said that's what Rob is doing too. Rob talked about how Kathy Bates was so into her character that she would take it home with her. He said he had to talk to her about not doing that.
Howard said that ''A Few Good Men'' was another movie that was nominated but Rob got no recognition for that. Robin asked if that is from having so much success. She said there were so many huge stars in that movie. Rob said it was a great cast. He said Jack Nicholson read the script the way he did it on screen the first time he read it. Howard said that you know the movie is going to be good with Jack. Howard asked if he's open to suggestions. Rob said every actor is different but Jack was open to things.
Howard asked if he had a falling out with Robert Redford. Rob said that Redford wanted to do a romantic movie and he didn't want to do it that way. He said that he worked with Warren Beatty on Misery and he told him that this was a prison movie not a horror movie. He said Warren thought about playing the part but he said no in the end. Howard asked if he thinks Warren went to see it and was upset he didn't do it. Rob said he doesn't think so. He said he turned down Superman and Warren was thinking that he'd be Superman and put the suit on and said he can't do this. Howard said it's so great.
Howard said the movie North came out and he took a beating on that. Rob said that it had some review from someone big who said it stinks and it just said ''stinks'' a bunch of time. Howard asked if that takes you right back down to being miserable. Rob said it doesn't help. Rob said he learned when All in the Family was on that you can't take it seriously. He said that he had a guy tell him that All in the Family and Beverly Hillbillies were the best two shows on TV.
Howard asked if Rob gets depressed for a while when a movie is like that. Rob said you do think about it for a few weeks but then you get back into it. Robin asked if he was working on another project at the time. Rob said he does try to do that. He said that way his mind is on other things.
Rob said he has a movie coming out on Friday called ''Being Charlie.'' Howard said his son Nick is there and he's going to have him come in. Howard said it was good to see him. Howard said he's a strapping young man. Nick said he's extremely nervous. Rob said he's Howard's biggest fan. He said that he's listened to everything Howard has ever done. Howard said how dare he let his son listen to such things. Rob said he can't control him.
Howard asked nick why he's putting himself in movies with his father and grandfather being who they are. Nick said he's got a GED and why not. Howard said the story in the movie is about how Nick doesn't know what to do with his father being in show business. Nick goes for drugs instead. Howard said he wrote a script about his actual life. He said it's not exactly his life. He said he was more fucked up and a lot fatter back then. He said they put some light on it. Howard asked if it was tough being Rob's son. Nick said it is but he's sure it's harder being in Syria or somewhere.
Howard said that it's a difficult thing to have this big famous father who has success after success. Howard said the movie focuses on that. Howard said it's an interesting topic. Robin asked when you realize your father is treated differently. Nick said it took him so many years to figure it out. He said when he did he started to get high.
Howard asked Nick about writing the script and how he portrays his father as an asshole. Howard asked Rob if that was difficult for him. Rob said it was easy to hear that. Rob said he helped develop this and in the beginning the father was a complete asshole. He said that Nick told him it wasn't all him and it was his writing partner who was throwing some of that in. Rob said it's not interesting to have a one dimensional character. He said as Nick and Matt worked on it Nick said the father was too much of an asshole. Nick said they kept him an asshole though. Nick said he did think his father was an asshole but then they started working on this. Howard asked what his problem was. Nick said he was just a little bitch.
Howard asked Nick about moving out to live on the streets at 15. Nick said it wasn't his idea. Rob said he didn't have any experience as a father with what to do with that. Nick said he was doing everything too. Howard asked Rob what he did. Rob said he listened to experts and did the tough love thing. He said that's not his nature though. He said he did this with Nick. Howard asked what he said to him. Nick said he had fucked up so many times in a row that it was getting serious. He said he was going to go live on the streets or go to a place where he wouldn't be allowed to leave for 6 months. Nick said he was angry and he moved to the streets. Howard said this was around 15. nick said it was at 18, not 15. Howard asked if Rob was worried this would get out to the papers. Rob said he didn't worry about that. He said he was worried about his son. He said he didn't think about that other stuff.
Howard asked Rob how painful this was for him to work on this film. rob said it was very fulfilling to do this film with his son. He said that it was very personal. He said it forced him to see what his son was going through. He said his son saw what he was going through too. He said they didn't do it to be therapeutic. He said that's how it turned out though.
Howard asked Nick what he did at night when he was on the street. Nick said he was hanging out with a group of people on the street in Maine. He said that he met a lot of interesting people. Howard said this has to be sad for Rob. He said this is his baby and for some reason he was unhappy. Howard said it must kill him as a father. Nick said he can't imagine going through something like that. Rob said he learned from making the film that you know your child better than experts know your child. He said if he had done what he wanted to do it would have been better for him. He said he let him be what he is and now he's doing better.
Howard asked Nick if he still has the temptation. Nick said he doesn't have it licked by any means. He said that he's still very young and who knows what will happen in 5 years. He said it got really old for him going to rehab and he just said he can't live like this anymore.
Howard asked Rob if he has to do this film because he knows his son has been through this. Rob said he didn't even know he was working on it. He said he gave it to him to just look at and he saw it and thought it could be much deeper than it was. He said he went back and wrote an hour comedy/drama. Nick said he didn't go to his dad asking him to direct it. Rob said they got into fights over things during the making of it. He said they learned to work together. He said that the movie is out on May 6th. He said even if the movie had never been released they've already won. He said that's because what they went through making it.
Howard asked Nick about being in rehab and how that works. Nick said they actually make things tough because they tell you that people are going to tell you things that aren't true and it hurts the relationship. Rob said you have to get to the root of the problem and they were holding it back.
Howard said this sounds like an interesting movie. Howard said Rob has given them so many great ones. Howard asked Nick if he's prepared for this to be a financial failure. Nick said he is. Howard said Nick has a full head of hair. Rob and his dad don't. Rob said they say that your hair comes from your mother's side of the family. He said he was prepared himself.
Howard asked Rob if people call him Carl. Rob said they do. He said it happens to his dad too. He said his dad gets called Rob. Rob said that he told his mom he wanted to change his name. He said his dad asked him what he wanted to change it to. Rob said he told him ''Carl.''
Howard asked what Nick's favorite movie is that his dad made. He said he thinks that it's ''Stand By Me.'' Howard said they had Jerry O'Connell in that movie. Rob said he's married to Rebecca Romijn now. Howard said that he is. they talked about River Phoenix dying too. Rob said whenever he sees Stand By Me he thinks about him because of the way he walks off and disappears. He said it was just a few years later that he really died.
Howard said that he hopes this movie does well. He said that families like to keep this stuff quiet but they're putting it out there for people. Howard said they made a movie together called ''Being Charlie.'' Howard said it opens in select theaters on Friday.
rob said they said it and it's true, Howard is the best interviewer. Howard said it's a real honor to meet Rob and it's great what he did with his son. Howard said he and his father didn't even make a sandwich together. He said father and son movies are important to see. Howard said he looks forward to seeing it. Howard thanked them for coming in and went to break. They played Steven Tyler and Slash performing ''Walk This Way'' at the Howard Stern Birthday Bash as they went to break.
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Howard said he hates when people watch him eat. He said he's disgusting when he eats. He said he hates eating in front of people. He said he will go to a restaurant and he likes a lot of tastes at once. He said he puts them in his mouth and he doesn't get them all in so he looks like fly. Howard said Beth must be grossed out. He said he needs a feed bag. Howard said animals walk around without clothes and don't give a shit. Robin said they crap right in front of you. Howard said he should shit in front of her instead of hiding in a corner. Howard said he'll see how pleased she is with that.
Robin said she heard about a fire where they found four kittens. She was thinking about Beth. Howard said he and Beth took a walk one evening while they were on vacation. He said he thinks the animals know they're coming by. Howard said he has one cat who some fucking weirdo put out on the street instead of going to a shelter. Howard said this cat is friendly and someone chopped its leg off. Howard said they're so sweet and you have to be so dark to do something like that. Howard said this lovely woman is taking the cat.
Howard said every room of his house has cats in it. He said it's like a hospital instead of a house. Howard said they try to take care of these situations. Howard said they were out to dinner and they went for a walk because he felt like a bloated asshole. Howard said he was farting and Beth didn't catch him. Howard said she caught him the other night when he was on the phone with Jimmy Kimmel and his wife. Howard said he was in the closet and he farted. He had texted Beth to come talk to Jimmy and Molly. Howard said he's farting in the closet and forgot he texted Beth. Howard said he's on the phone and Beth walks in and goes ''Ohh! What did you shit in here?'' Howard said there was no animal to blame it on. Howard said he didn't think. He said Beth left the room and didn't speak to Jimmy and Molly. Howard said it was really a sexual turn off he's sure. Howard said it was like he shit on the floor.
Howard said he has so much tremendous gas. He said he eats like a wolf. Howard said some days he makes two doodies and some none.
Howard said they're on this walk after dinner on vacation and Beth looks and sees a cat standing in the middle of the road. Howard said they can't walk by. He said Beth has to get the cat and start knocking on doors. Howard said they're knocking on doors looking for the owner. Howard said this cat was walking around on the street and they can't leave it out. Howard said they knock on doors and find nothing. Howard said there was one house they went to and no one answered. Howard said they went to the neighbor's house and asked him. Howard said he can't even go for a walk without rescuing a cat.
Robin asked if they found the owner. Howard said the cat is laying in the street and they went to all of the houses. Howard said Beth wants to take the cat home so they did that. Howard said the cat was so friendly. He said Beth picks it up and he asks if she's crazy. Howard said they feed the cat and they play with it. Howard said Beth takes it to the vet and the cat is micro chipped but it's not registered. They figured it out and found out the cat was out accidentally for 2 days. Howard said they saved the cat. Howard said they returned it and it's fine. Howard said he can't even go for a walk without drama.
Howard said if you microchip a cat then register it. Howard said that this woman didn't register it. Howard said you have to put a collar on it too. Howard said they have to microchip Beetlejuice. He said he gets out all the time. Robin said you can't do that. Robin said it would have been crazy if Howard had been killed saving the cat.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he rescued the same dog in the neighborhood 3 times. He said that it keeps going back to the same owner. Robin asked what's up with the people who keep letting it go. Howard said it's better off with the owner than going to a shelter. Howard said people are so mean and abusive. Howard said you have to be an angry fuck to chop a cat's leg off. Howard said they left the cat out and it had maggots in the leg and all of that. Howard said he wants to chop this guy's leg off and let maggots get in there. Howard said he's not sure what to tell this guy to do. He said he has 99 problems and they're all animal rescues.
Howard took a call from a woman who said he did another stellar interview with Rob Reiner. Howard said that guy has made so many great movies. Howard said he doesn't think Steven Spielberg has made as many in a row. Robin said that Rob acts too though. The caller asked to play a game but Howard had to get to the news.
Robin stared her news with a story about a Scientology book that's coming out and there are stories about David Miscavige who runs the church of Scientology. Robin said Ron Miscavige walked away in 2012 but his son is still in it.
Robin read a story about how walking through first class on an airplane can cause rage in some passengers.
Howard took a call from a guy who was so muffled that it was impossible to hear him. The caller had to start over. He asked if he's for transgender rights in a grade school. Howard said he is very liberal when it comes to that. Howard said he is. The caller said he's not sure where he stands on it. Howard said they have to talk to the kids about that stuff. Howard said if they do maybe they'll have some hope for the next generation. The caller said maybe it should be left up to the parents. Howard said that if it comes up then you address it head on. Howard said it's so simple. Howard said Caitlyn Jenner struck a big blow by using a bathroom in North Carolina. Howard said he has a clip. Howard played the fake clip of Caitlyn going into a women's bathroom and taking a huge dump.
Robin said transgender people say that this isn't about what genitals they have down there. Howard said he doesn't ask. He said there's no big issue there. Howard said there is no issue and it was never a big issue. Howard said that some conservative men are standing guard at bathrooms. Howard said the least hot thing to do is watch a woman take a dump or pee. Robin said someone floated the idea of letting people who can't have babies take maternal leave. Howard said it's absurd. Howard said when a company hires someone they need people to work. Howard said they can't give people weeks off. He said they need to work. Robin said there's a woman who wrote an article about how pet owners should have time off for their pets. Howard said no. He said we have a lot of damaged people in this country.
Howard said Shuli took 2 months of paternity leave and all he did was play Xbox. Howard said he has to admit now that he did that. Shuli came in and said it was just one month. He said he did play some Xbox. Howard said he had a lot of fun. Shuli said they mailed him a purple heart for Call of Duty because he played so much. Howard asked how old he is. Shuli said he's 41. Howard said he has some nice color in that beard. He asked if he's coloring it. Shuli said he's not. Howard asked Benjy if he's still dying his. Benjy said he is. Howard said they found that Shuli watched Netflix for 7 days straight and he watched a ton of movies. Shuli said Jason the Rat was the one who did that. Shuli said he spent time with the kid too. Shuli said he's all for paternity leave. Howard said Shuli played a soccer video game 27 times in the month he was off. Howard said that's what he was doing on paternity leave. He said he's against all of this nonsense. Howard let Shuli go and did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about a guy named Hunter Osbourne who is a high school football player who exposed himself in a school photo and it ended up in a program for the football team and in the year book. Robin said he's not in jail. Robin said he was 18 at the time so he's charged with providing this stuff to minors.
Robin read about how 4 of Prince's siblings were in court over who should handle his stuff. Robin said there are new people coming out of the woodwork claiming to be related to Prince. Howard said Benjy is claiming to be Prince's quarter brother.
Robin read a story about Sinead O'Connor blaming Arsenio Hall for giving Prince drugs for years. She said Arsenio's people are saying her claims are false of course.
Robin read a story about the father who beat up his son in a clip in yesterday's news. Robin said the son has been taken out of the house. Robin said she was thinking about how they play this stuff to point out that it's wrong. Robin said it's something the guy should get help for. Robin had some audio of the guy boxing his son after he did something wrong. Robin said the father is about 7 inches taller and about 100 pounds more than his son.
Robin read about the Zika virus and how the birth defects we heard about may just be the tip of the iceberg. Robin said there may be hidden birth defects. Fred played Beetlejuice clips where he's trying to say Maria Menounos. They also played some audio of Beet talking about the Zika virus. Robin said they say the baby may look okay when born but the Zika could cause other problems. Robin read about some other issues that can come from that.
Robin read a story about the Tony nominations being announced. Howard said no one cares. He said it must be Hamilton that got nominated. Howard said he's sick of hearing about it. He said he guesses he has to see it though. Robin had some audio from the play Hamilton. Howard said people are freaking out over it.
Robin read a story about a football player who is accused of raping a developmentally disabled woman who was interviewing for a babysitting job at his house. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about the Indiana primary that's taking place today. Robin said this is Ted Cruz's last chance to keep going. Howard said Carly Fiorina fell off the stage at an event she was introducing Ted Cruz at. Howard played a clip but they had embellished it with some audio of a woman screaming after falling out of a grape press and breaking some ribs.
Robin read about a poll that was taken and Trump had 41 percent to Clinton's 39 percent. Robin said it might be a close race. Howard said it's going to be a battle royale.
Robin read about how Hillary Clinton had to apologize for saying coal country is over. Robin had some audio of her talking about what she said. Howard asked what's up with her health. Robin said it's from doing all of the speeches and talking so loud. Howard said she needs an ear piece so she can hear herself talking.
Robin read a story about a self driving ship that will be tested for the next two weeks in the Pacific.
Robin read a story about people being addicted to their smartphones. Robin said a study was done that found 50 percent of kids 12-18 are addicted. Robin said they find that 2/3 of parents think their teens spend too much time on them.
Robin read how Hulk Hogan is suing Gawker again. Robin said he says that they released a tape that got him banned from wrestling. Robin said that he was fired when the tape was released. Howard said that it's an honor to some to be removed from the WWE.
Robin read about how Sumner Redstone could be deposed for a case about his mental competence. Howard said that guy refuses to die. Robin said an ex girlfriend is suing him and saying he was mentally incompetent as his health care agent. Howard said that everyone is afraid of that guy. He said it leaves Viacom in a weird position.
Robin read a story about a woman who is suing Johnson and Johnson over a product she used that may have given her cancer. She said it's talcum powder that she's suing over. Howard said they should have said Robin used it. Robin said she's sure she used it at some point. Robin said it's in baby powder. Robin said that everyone used it as a baby. Robin wrapped up and Howard ended the show around 11:15am.
Jon said their guest today is Lenny Jacobson. Lenny said he's impressed with the new studio. Gary said it's not actually their studio. It's just the one they use. Jon said they also have jazz musician Anthony Wilson sitting in. Jon said Nick Reiner is also sitting in. Nick said he's sorry to disappoint that it's him and not his father sitting in. Jon said he thought the interview was great and nick being in with his dad was special for that last 20 minutes of the interview. They spent a short time talking about that interview.
Jon said Lenny knows Howard gets into it and he'll bring his upbringing into it. Lenny said he loves those kind of interviews. Anthony said that's what makes the interviews so great. He said you learn something essential about the person.
Jon asked about Bobo's calls and what they think. Nick said he's all for it because it's great when they goof on him. Lenny said it was nice not having him on last summer. He said it was also nice having him come back and having a complete letdown when he did return. He said they do need him on the show though. Anthony said you can count on Bobo to be Bobo so he thinks it's great. Gary said Bobo is Bobo and if he changed all of a sudden it wouldn't be funny anymore.
Jon said Bobo can always tell himself that it's a success every time no matter what happens. He said he's a catalyst for all of this stuff that happens. Gary said he knows Bobo is genuinely trying. He said those are the best questions he has. Jon played a clip of Bobo asking a question today.
Jon said the other thing that was introduced today was the boat horn. He said Benjy has to get used to that. He said he thinks it's going to happen more.
Jon said you never know what's going to happen the next morning on the show. Nick said he thought Howard was going to shit all over him this morning. He said Howard was real nice though. He said if you do really bad it's a good appearance. Gary said he was really nervous before going in. He said he knows that Nick is a really big fan of the show. He said his mom was a fan too. Nick said that he was really nervous before he went in but it's such an easy interview so you don't have to do anything. He said Howard does it all.
Jon asked Nick if he had to prepare for the interview. Nick said his dad didn't have to prepare. He said he knows the rhythm of the show so he tried to do the best he could himself. They went to break after that.
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Lenny said when he first came on and met Sal and Richard they prank called Nicole Bass. He said they're both so damn nice. He said then you hear the crazy stuff they played over the weekend and you remember how fucked up they are.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that Bobo's question was something he asked a couple of months ago. He said it was the exact same question. Gary said he believes him but that's the beauty of Bobo. He said he isn't Albert Brooks and he can't try the same bit out twice.
Jon took a call from a guy who asked if they think Howard would have wanted a son or is he okay not having one. Gary said he thinks he's okay without a son. He said that kids don't grow up the way you want all the time. He said Howard isn't going to go to a Met or Jet game every weekend if the kid is into that. Gary said Howard's perfect son would be a kid who wants to see Batman with him. Jon said that's Ralph. He said he thinks JD is more of a son. They spent a title time talking about JD and Howard's relationship which can be like a father and son.
Jon said nothing is ever forgotten on the show. He said that happened to Shuli today. He said that Howard brought up his paternity leave. Jon said Howard doesn't seem to think that it's a thing that should be taken. Gary said he thinks Howard might think that if you do take it you're a bit of a pussy. Lenny said Howard's work ethic is what everyone should have. He said if you take time off to have a baby like Shuli did then Howard thinks you're a pussy. Gary said that they came in on a day that Howard was supposed to be fired from NBC. He said no one was there other than him. He said that none of management came in because of a hurricane. He said Howard showed up and they fired him the following Monday. Lenny said Howard is there when he's supposed to be. He said it would be weird if he wasn't.
Jon said Howard talked about Kelly Ripa not showing up for work. He said you can't take that stuff personally and you just go to work. He said that's his attitude. They went to break a short time later.
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Jon said Howard talked about Alec Baldwin's new gig as the host of Match Game. Jon said he was shocked that Benjy didn't know how to play along to Match Game. Gary said a lot of weird people used to show up on those game shows. He talked about a couple of those people who were best known for being on the game shows. Jon said he thinks Howard would love to be a host of a game show.
Jon said Howard tends to forget about the rules of the game and Robin is there to rein him in. Lenny said he can't believe Benjy didn't know that pussy Willow thing. Gary said Benjy has never seen the Brady Bunch or The Godfather. He said that his pop culture references aren't that great.
Jon said he wants to cover the Wack Pack and the updates they got on them today. Jon asked if Nick worries about the Wack Pack sticking around. Nick said he does. He said Big Foot is hilarious and that stuff can only come out of his brain. He said you know no one is feeding him that stuff. Jon said they got to hear the Beetlejuice stuff too. Jon said that would be a huge loss. Anthony said you can't replace that one. Lenny said that it's a rare unicorn kind of thing. He said he doesn't think you can force it either. He said you have to wait for the next crop of diamonds in the rough.
Gary said they have had people show up on their radar but they just disappear. Gary said he thought Monotone Matt was going to be big but he's not around. He said he wonders where Marfan Matt is at too. They talked about how they find the Wack Pack. Some of them just show up and some of them are referred to them.
Jon asked Rahsaan about the poll and what the results were. The guys gave their guesses. Rahsaan said that 28 percent said they would attend. They spent a little time talking about that and got in some plugs before ending the show. They were done around Noon.
Howard started the show talking up the Rob Zombie opening song ''The Great American Nightmare.'' Howard said when they were in Washington DC they had a slogan of ''Crank it up.'' He said they thought that radio guys were such idiots that they wrote it out on a card so he'd remember to say it twice an hour. Howard said he's in the right business. He said his IQ must be like Albert Einstein in the radio business because he has no problem remembering that. Howard said they had kick ass rock and roll there but then some moms complained about the slogan and they had to take it down. Howard said they didn't like kick ass. Howard said they were trying to be bad but hold on to their McDonald's sponsorship. He said you can do that or throw all caution to the wind and see what happens.
Howard said when he first got to the station there they had McDonald's and Burger King. All of the traditional sponsors who are family image. Howard said he'd be on the air for a couple of days and no one would cancel. Then about a week later they'd start to cancel. He said they'd cancel their station and everyone looks at you sideways thinking they made a big mistake hiring you. He said he had to do the impossible and shoot up to number 1. He said he had to do that immediately or be fired. Howard said his career is so stressful. He said he thinks he doesn't get paid enough for that stress.
Howard said after a few weeks he has sponsors like Squatty Potty. Howard said they might even take offense. Howard said the people who have a thing you put your feet on to take a dump might not want to tarnish their image. Howard said the sales guys at NBC had it so easy. Howard said they'd pick up the phone and get ads for their station no problem. He said then he comes to NBC. He said week 1 was fine. By week 3 the only sponsor left was a shaving cream for a woman's vagina (Peau de Soie - Thanks Van). He said all of the other jocks had like 16 ivy league commercials. Howard said it's so stressful.
Howard said your first kid comes and then the second. He said he really had no game plan for feeding them. He said he's talking about shaving pussy for ad dollars. He said it's emasculating and humiliating. Robin said then he'd have to play Barry Manilow. Howard said at least at DC101 he could play rock. Howard said even that wasn't too crazy.
Howard said it's no wonder his ratings went up so fast. He said he had no commercials. Howard said they had a consultant come in and have them go commercial free for 2 months. Howard said they'd shoot right up to number 1 of course. Then they'd realize they had to make money and they'd put on commercials. Howard said the listeners feel so betrayed by that. Howard said people want crazy change but they don't know why. Howard said things were over after the commercials came back to the station.
Howard asked Sal what's up with that story. Sal said his buddy had a Vanity air freshener in his car. He said his friend told him that Prince used to like watching Vanity lick a German Sheppard's cock. Howard asked Sal if he really thinks that everyone knows that. He said his friend just told him that because he knows Sal is an idiot. Howard said that's why he told him that. Howard said that's what he assumes is going on. Sal said it might be true.
Howard said Raspberry Beret is about a gaping asshole. Howard asked if he knows what it really is. Sal said it's when you bang a girl in the ass and you pull your cock out and it looks like a raspberry beret. Howard said he's an imbecile. Howard told him to leave. Howard said that guy is on the payroll.
Howard said they could do 4 hours a day of Sal material. Howard said Sal is in love with this Long Island Psychic and her husband. Howard said that Sal brags that Theresa can connect to the afterlife and understand any language, even animals. Howard said if your dog dies she can speak dog. Howard said people are imbeciles and that's why religion flourishes. Howard said just doing something on Sal's religion would be great. Howard said all of a sudden it all becomes universal to Theresa. Howard said everyone speaks English when they're dead, even animals.
Howard said Sal thinks that you can connect to dead people on Ayahuasca. Howard said he doesn't know that people are just hallucinating.
Howard said all of that doesn't stop Sal from doing great work. Howard said they did a great Jack and Rod Show bit. Howard said Sal introduces Bernie Sanders as ''Mr. Bernie Sanders'' instead of Senator. Howard said he can't even go into all of the Sal stuff. Howard said they have to play some of his brilliant stuff to show why he works there.
Howard said Sal was talking about why he thinks Donald Trump will make a great president. He thinks he'll be great because he gets a lot of pussy. Sal came in and said that the guy gets a lot of vagina and he does well. He said guys like George Clooney are very happy and successful. Howard asked if John Stamos would be the greatest ever. Sal said no but he has a lot of confidence. He said he'll be good at it because it helps the mind and clears the mind. Howard said Sal is so befuddled because he gets no pussy. Sal said no but look at Bill Clinton. He said Bill couldn't think straight. He said he shoved a cigar up an intern's cunt. Howard told him to get out. Sal said he's making too much sense.
Howard said they're all clear that Sal would make a bad president. Howard played the Jack and Rod Show bit that Sal and Richard did with an author of a book. They started to talk to him and then said Bernie Sanders just came in. They had fake Bernie talking to the guy but then he has to take a bathroom break. They kept Bernie's microphone on as he was shitting. Sal and Richard had the author keep talking about his book as Bernie was shitting. The doctor could still hear the shitting sounds so he kept telling them he could hear it. They went to break after that.
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Howard said Sour is crazy. He said he leaves voicemails all night. He said he calls Jon Hein as Gary and sings him love songs. Howard said that impression is so close to Gary and Gary doesn't hear it. Howard said it's exactly like Gary to him though. Howard played a clip of Sour doing his Gary impression and singing a song to Jon Hein about pieces of vinyl.
Howard said Sour does an impression of George Takei too. Howard said when Memet was getting a lot of pussy Sour was using his George Takei impression to come on to Memet. Howard said it's just so good. Howard played some of the stuff he left for Memet. Sour was telling Memet to stay away from Patricia (Tan Mom) because she can't get his name right.
Howard said Sour Shoes has done specials and he stays in character all day. He said he's in some character at all times. Howard said the baby voice is his real voice and that's the one he hates. Howard said his other impressions are spot on.
Howard said they got their science department to build a Ronnie the Robot because Ronnie can't come in all the time. Howard said they have an actual robot in there now. Howard asked Robin if she wanted to talk to him. Robin said of course. Howard got the robot up and running and spoke to the robot that was being voiced by Ronnie who was doing a robot type voice from the 60s. Ronnie said he sees all and fucks all. Howard asked Ronnie the Robot if he would ever have sex with Caitlyn Jenner. Ronnie tripped over a line and screwed it up. Howard said even a robot can make mistakes.
Howard asked Ronnie the Robot another question and said they may never do this again. Ronnie asked what the fuck his problem is. Robin said he has a worse personality than the real Ronnie. Howard asked Ronnie the Robot if a woman can be a 10 if she has small boobs. Ronnie said only if she has a huge clit. Howard said he likes it.
Howard took a call from a guy and asked if he had a question for Ronnie the Robot. The caller said not really. Ronnie said ''Fuck you is gold.'' Howard said that means they wrote him a line and he fucked it up. Ronnie repeated it and said ''Fuck you this is gold.'' Howard asked the caller if he had anything else for Ronnie the Robot. The caller said Ronnie sucks.
Howard asked Ronnie the Robot some more questions and said this is so bad but he's fascinated. Robin said for a moment it had some life. Howard asked Ronnie the Robot a question and he fucked up the answer and started laughing. Howard asked if he eats food. Ronnie said he has to turn the page. He said he eats pussy sandwiches and cunt burgers. Howard thanked Ronnie the Robot. He was about to let him go but a caller had a question. The caller said he's tired of Ronnie. He said there's nothing redeeming about what he has to say. Howard thanked him for the call. Ronnie the Robot said ''You go fuck yourself.''
Howard asked Ronnie how to solve the deficit. Ronnie kept saying ''What?'' He said he's downloading pictures of Taylor Swift's pussy. He's friends with her toilet. He said they came out of the same factory. Howard said he's going to turn him off now. He said he sucks. Ronnie said he needs time to replenish his robot cum. He said he shoots ropes.
Howard said that was bad. He said he's trying to figure out why they did it in the first place. Robin said it wasn't as bad as the first JDini. Howard said he thought it would be funny if they had a robot for Ronnie. He said he thought it would be funny to hear him as a robot. Howard said it just tanked. He said it was horrible. Howard said he used to take LSD and get a lot of good ideas. He said this is like one of them.
Howard took a call from a guy who said they should crush that robot. Howard said they tried. He said they don't have a place to try this stuff out beforehand.
Howard asked the caller if he wants to win some money. the caller said he did but Howard said his phone connection sucks. Howard said his daughter was on the phone yesterday and her connection sucked too. Howard said he had to repeat what she was saying. Howard said his middle daughter is having her 30th birthday. He said he's freaked out by that. Howard said they'll forget about the robot now and move on to a game. Howard said the robot was a funny idea but it didn't work. Howard said they had Flat Ronnie in tinfoil as the robot but it just tanked. Howard said they have to let Ronnie be Ronnie.
Howard said they have a video of Ronnie the Robot up on the web site now. Jason said it's just the robot working with his lights flashing. Howard said maybe it's better to just see him.
Howard said they're bringing back the Beetlejuice Face Game. Howard had Fred play some music for the game. Howard said the game is very simple. He said they asked Beetlejuice who this is and show him a picture of someone. He said they showed him Pac Man and asked who it was. Beet knew it was Pac Man. Howard said the caller has to guess if Beetle will know who these people are.
Howard said they have $500 from Casper beds. Howard asked the caller if Beet will know a picture of The Joker from Batman. The caller said he thinks he does. Beet's answer was ''Bad guy.''
They showed Beetlejuice a picture of Robin Quivers. Howard said Beet has met her a million times. Howard asked the caller if he thinks Beet will know who this is. The caller said Beet will know her. Howard locked him in on a yes. Beet's answer was ''Oprah, yep.''
They showed Beetlejuice a picture of Beetlejuice. Howard asked the caller, Craig, if he will know himself. Craig said yes. Beet's answer was ''Me, Beetle.'' Craig got that one right.
Howard said once they had a black intern working there and she brought Beet some coffee and Beet said ''Thanks Robin.'' He said that's a true story.
They showed Beetlejuice a picture of Ronald McDonald. Howard asked if Craig thinks Beet will know that one. Craig said he thinks Beet will know him. Howard played Beet's answer and Beet said ''McDonald's man'' which was close enough for Howard.
They showed Beetlejuice a picture of Ronnie Mund. Howard asked Craig if he'll know Ronnie. Craig said he will know Ronnie. Howard played Beet's answer which was ''Ronnie that fucking bastard...'' Howard said Craig just won $500 courtesy of Casper Mattress.
Howard asked Craig what he's going to do with the money. Craig said he's going to go blow it. Howard said he is a dynamic contestant. Howard put him on hold and thanked him for helping erase the stank of the Ronnie the Robot bit. Howard went to break a short time later.
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Howard took a call from a guy who thought Ronnie the Robot was funny. Howard said he'd bring him back for a second try.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked if he saw Woody Harrelson trying to get a weed shop. Howard said he did see that. He said he failed to get it. Howard said he didn't read deeper into it though. The caller said he thinks there were 60 entities that applied and they only gave it to 8 of them. He said they went to corporations. He said Woody has a corporation for medical marijuana though. Howard said he'd have to look into it deeper. Robin asked where this was. The caller said it was in Hawaii. The caller said there was a really good Wrap Up Show on Monday. He said they had Prince's former publicist on and he was very interesting. Howard asked if he had any insight on why Prince was never on the show. The caller said no but he talked a lot about how tough it was to interview Prince.
Gary came in and said that Prince did almost no interviews. Howard said he did Larry King though. Gary said that was a rare one. Gary said Prince would be in a room with people but not do a regular interview. Howard said that's why Prince was a dick. Howard said he didn't leave a will and he broke that guitar at Jimmy Fallon's show and he didn't let reporters have recorders. Howard said that's the dick part of Prince. He said it's the music genius part that they loved.
Gary told Howard some of the other things the publicist told them. He said he was there when Prince did the name change thing and how there was no way to explain that to people. Howard did an impression of Larry King doing the interview with Prince and talking about how vague Prince's answers were. Robin said Oprah interviewed him too and she had to pull answers out of him.
Howard said Gary got complimented on the ''great'' Wrap Up Show. Howard said he doesn't believe it was great so he'll have to go listen.
Howard took a call from a woman who said she knows Howard is an expert on animals. Howard said he's not. He said his wife is. The caller said she has a baby bird in the back yard and she's not sure if she should pick it up or not. Howard said birds have a limited sense of smell. Howard said they don't abandon birds that have been touched by humans. Howard said they can't smell a human on them. He said what they will do is if their nest is disturbed they will abandon the nest. Howard said they won't abandon it after the baby is born. Howard said she can touch it. He said she shouldn't move it but she can touch it.
Howard said he was dumbfounded when he found out he was writing a book about fast food. Howard said he writes about who has the best ice. Howard said he's an expert on fast food. Howard said Jon claims it sold well too.
Howard said one of the fans took the audio book and remixed the song Tom Sawyer from Rush with clips from the book. Howard played that and said it takes hours to do that. Howard said whoever does that has a lot of free time. Howard replayed the clip.
Howard said people want a Bobo Free Summer again. Howard said that it's almost overwhelming how many people want to ban Bobo. Howard said he's on the line even though they told him to take a day off. Howard picked up on Bobo and said that he did have to ban him last summer but he won't do that again just to do it. Bobo said he was worried. Howard said he doesn't think it's legal to ban him without an offense. Howard said he doesn't have one positive email about Bobo though. Howard read through a bunch and people were bashing the shit out of Bobo. Howard read some really negative stuff. People were calling him retarded and stupid. Someone asked them to cut him out of the replays. One person said that he shows what not to say on the show when you call in.
Howard kept going and some people said they want a Bobo Free Summer again. Howard said one guy said he loves to hate Bobo. Howard said Bobo thinks he's doing well though. Bobo said when he's talking to Howard it's painful when Fred is playing the Bobo songs. Howard said he has a new one from Little Mikey. Howard played that which was telling Bobo to get off the phone to the tune of ''Hey Mickey.''
Howard said that one goes on and on and on. Bobo said they're being pumped out at an alarming rate. Howard read more email about Bobo. Howard said Sal hates Bobo. Bobo said he doesn't believe that. Sal came in and said that Bobo is so calculated and manipulative. He said that he calls in asking if there's good email. He wants Howard to read it. He said that he talks about Fred playing the songs. He said if he really hates it then don't call. Sal said the truth is that he hates the negative attention. Bobo said he's not right. Howard said Sal really hates Bobo. Sal said no. Howard said maybe he's jealous of that because his thing is acting like an idiot. Sal said he would take a step back if he really didn't like it.
Howard said Sal is really angry. Sal said he's sick of the broken record of Bobo and his stupid toupee. Bobo said he thought he had his back. Howard said maybe Bobo is just a superfan. Sal said he just keeps doing the same thing day after day. Sal said if he cares about the fans then stop calling in. Bobo said that Sal was him at one time. He said he did anything he had to do to get on the show. Sal said it worked for him. He said Bobo just annoys people and he's nothing. Bobo thanked him for the nice praise.
Howard played another new song parody for Bobo. Howard said there you go. Bobo said he's loving all of this. He said he just got ripped by Sal and he still loves it. Howard took a call from Bobo's Toupee who said he said he hopes he gets a German red dog dick in his ass. Howard said maybe he needs a rebranding. Bobo said this is his style when he calls in. Bobo's Toupee said he should try branding himself with a hot iron.
Howard thanked Bobo for the call and let him go. Howard said he has a couple of days to come up with some new questions and he's looking forward to hearing them. Bobo said he has one now but he'll hold on to it until Monday. Howard played another song parody about Bobo to play him off. They went right to break after that.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he wants more Bobo. Howard said this must be a friend of Bobo or Bobo himself. The caller said he looks forward to him every day. He said he really does enjoy his phone calls. He said maybe an embedded segment with him or something like that would be good. Howard thanked him for the call.
Howard said he has a couple of fun things to get to before Robert Downey Jr. comes in. Howard said he watched Captain America the other night and it was really good. He said he isn't as good an actor as Robert is though.
Howard got the audio of Wayne Siegel doing his commercial read for the Legend Auto Group. Howard played it and goofed on the way Wayne was reading. Howard said it sounds like he lowered his voice. Howard said he sounds like he has a cold too. Howard said there's a reason they pay guys to do this. Howard said he might be suffering from carbon monoxide poisoning.
Howard stared the clip over and said that Long Island accent drives people nuts. Howard said he said dealer as ''deelah.'' Howard said that show ''Limitless'' that had Ronnie on wants Wayne on now. Howard played more of the commercial and said he defies anyone to stay tuned during that. Howard said now they have to try to recover the audience after that. Howard said it's like a kid getting up in front of a class in school and reading something. Howard said Wayne must want to be famous. Howard said it's awful when you have that feeling and there's no reason to be famous.
Howard played more of the audio and goofed on Wayne. Howard said that he's passing the savings from not paying for a commercial on to his customers. Howard said his dad had a thick accent like that. Howard said that he had a deep voice and he wanted timbre in his voice. Howard said he wanted to sound like an announcer but he was never able to get it right. Howard had Fred play a clip of his dad talking about ''proper modulation.'' Then Howard played Wayne reading his commercial. Howard said what a nightmare. Howard said you know there's some ad guy who said that was great. He said they told Wayne that was the best one. Howard said what a disaster that is. He said that he's got something good to sell and that's the commercial.
Howard said it's like when you see these guys who force prisoners to read a statement. He said that's how it comes out. Howard said they have a knife to their neck and they do a better read. Robin asked if someone is holding gun to Wayne's head. Howard said he has no inflection at all. Howard said he knows what he's doing. He said he didn't want anyone to goof on him so he kept it very straight. Howard said Wayne's business is so good that he's trying to slow it down with this commercial. Howard went to break a short time later. As they went to break they played a phony phone call the guys made to an internet radio show using clips of Howard talking about the Khaleesi from Game of Thrones.
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Howard came back and said Robert Downey Jr. is there. Howard said Robert is the highest paid actor in Hollywood for 3 years in a row. Howard said all hail Iron Man. Howard said he got that franchise going single handed. Howard said he should take a victory lap. Fred was playing ''Iron Man.'' Howard asked if he's filming another one because he has the Tony Stark facial hair. Robert said he did it just for Howard.
Howard asked if he's going to do the pull back on his face some day. Robert said no because he doesn't want to hear it from Howard when he does. He said that there is a guy who is dying to get his scalpel on him. He said he won't give his name though. Howard said that must be insulting when someone says they can make you into a 10 from a 9. Robert said he wanted to do something to his cheeks. Howard said he sees him aging gracefully.
Howard asked Robert about putting out an album and if he ever considered singing as a career. Howard said he saw this video of him singing with Sting and he's singing ''Driven to Tears.'' Howard said he's really good. Howard asked how that came about and where was it? Robert said it was a birthday for Sting and he asked him to rehearse with him. Howard asked how he knew he could sing. Robert said they're pretty close and they've known each other for some time now. Howard asked if that's a great part of being famous. He asked if it's as exciting as they imagine. Robert said anyone he looks at would agree. He said that they might be schmucks and you might not get along. He said if they are thoughtful and fun to be around then it's great. He said Sting is one of those guys. Howard asked if he ever sang with him privately.
Robert said when he was in his mid 20s he decided he was one of the great song writers of all time. He said he went to one of Sting's shows and he tries pushing his cassette tape in his hand. He said that he did what he does now and put it in someone else's hand. Robert said he had someone handle him and kept walking. He said he had a little scarab on it and it was really a psychotic move. He said he wanted Sting to hear the music because he'd understand and he'd be opening for him in 2 weeks. He said about 25 years later Trudy told him they found the tape and asked if he wanted it back. Robert said that he did take it back so they would never hear it.
Howard said he would think that Robert is comfortable on stage performing. Howard said he's seen him do things on stage and he's loose as a goose. Robert said it seems that way. Howard asked if he was nervous singing the song with Sting. Robert said he's nervous coming in there. He said he listens to the show all the time. Robin said he doesn't look nervous. Robert said if he looked the way he feels all the time he'd be in the loony bin. Robert said every day is a new day and he wonders how he feels every day. Howard asked if he thinks about being the highest paid actor in Hollywood and he's on track to make the most money with a movie of all time.
Howard said he's going to play Robert singing ''Driven to Tears.'' He said he has a rehearsal for it. Robert said he didn't have just one. He said Sting ran him ragged rehearsing. He said he treated him like he didn't know him and he was auditioning to be a back up singer. Howard asked if he was mimicking Sting or trying to sound like himself. Robert said he was trying to sound like himself. He said to sing it correctly you want to have Sting's phrasing though. Howard said Sting kind of ruined it when he sang with him. Howard played the clip and Robert was singing the song just fine when Sting came in and did the duet thing. Howard said he really did shock the audience with his singing. Howard said that was the chilling moment. Robert said it chilled him. Howard asked if that's just another day in the life of Robert Downey Jr.. Robert said it thrilled him too.
Howard asked what Sting said to him after that. Robert said he was doing a show so he didn't stop to tell him anything. He said Sting was the reason it went well. Howard asked if he wanted to do a tribute to Prince today. He said he has the music and lyrics. Robert said that's all that's going on now. He said it's amazing how many things are backing up against each other this year. Howard said they lost Garry Shandling who was in Iron Man with him. Robert said that he got to know him a little bit on the set of the movie. He said that he was friendly with Jon Favreau. Howard said that he was relatively young and so was Prince and Bowie. Glenn Frey too. Howard said Chyna died too. Robert said he wasn't entirely aware of Chyna.
Howard said Robert put out the album the Futurist and he wasn't working that much back then. Howard said he put it out to see what happens. Howard said he'll start a band with him. Robert said they can light the world afire with that.
Howard asked if it's hard for Robert to sit in an audience and watch other people work and not want to jump up on stage and show he can do it too. Robert said it's a phase for some people. He said sometimes it lasts indefinitely. He said he's happy to just be there.
Howard asked if Robert has had to turn down movies that he really wanted to do because he's doing Iron Man. Robert said not really. He said he'd find time to do them if he really wanted to. Howard asked if the Iron Man thing is his whole life. Robert said it's really not. He said he has other things he's working on. He said the biggest the casts get the easier it gets for him because he's not carrying them.
Howard said he loves all of the super hero movies. Howard said the new movie is on track to be the biggest one yet. Howard said that it's supposedly going to be the biggest box office gross of all time. Howard said it's Robert, Chris Evans as Captain America and Spider-Man is in the movie. Howard said it's a whole fucking thing. Robert said it's ridiculous. Howard said they have to heap a whole ton of dough on him for this. Howard said he read that it was 40 million. Robert said he wants to say he's fairly accurate on that. Howard asked if that tickles him. Robert said he's never been motivated by money. Howard said of course but it's great to be able to say fuck you to anything. Robin said it brings artistic freedom. Robert said it's an odd thing to consider. He said he's not embarrassed by the money. He said that if you can negotiate that money then you deserve it.
Howard said that he thinks he's single handedly made the Iron Man movies and put Marvel on the map. Howard asked if he would get upset if he was replaced as Tony Stark. Robert said no. He said if he had asked him in 2008-2010 he would say that he was holding it up. He said he got to be the front man in a band that was going to be in the hall of fame no matter what. Howard said he could have fucked it up. Robert said sure.
Howard said when he walks on the set the world is his oyster. Robert said maybe he's not seizing the day enough. Howard asked if he has to walk on the set and say thank you and please to everyone on the set so no one thinks he's a diva. Robert said if he's behaving a certain way he might just be playing the game. Howard said Superman and Batman got panned. He said it made a lot of money but it doesn't set it up for the next one if people don't respond. Robert said you can tank anytime.
Howard asked if Robert's biggest fear is to get Alzheimers and he screams to get the Iron Man suit and he ends up walking around in it. Robert said he hopes Howard is still around to see that happen some day.
Howard said in the first Iron Man they wanted Tom Cruise. Robert said he never heard that. He said he knows they wanted him to play Chaplain. He said he's not sure about Iron Man. Howard said even in Pretty in Pink they wanted him to play Ducky. Howard said they went with Jon Cryer. Howard said he was talking about how every movie he ever went up for Matthew Broderick got. Howard asked if Robert was frustrated when he heard that Molly Ringwald wanted him. Robert said he thinks that most people get the part they're supposed to get. He said it's sour grapes if you complain. He said before Iron Man there was part of him saying that he had to change his world view. He said there is a bit of destiny involved in this stuff. He said he changed his attitude.
Robert told Howard how he played the part of Tony Stark. He said he thought about what it would be like to be that person. Howard said it's him imagining himself as a super success. Robert said he doesn't have a process he uses but when it hits him he uses it.
Howard said Jon Cryer talked about going to the same acting camp that Robert did. Howard said Jon talked about how most of the guys were gay so it was a field day there for straight guys. Robert said he had a great time at summer camp. He said he wants to thank Rhonda. He said that she made out with him after giving him a hit off her cigarette. Howard said Natalie Portman went to the same camp. Howard said Zach Braff, Jennifer Jason Leigh and others went there too. Howard asked if they have teachers there who teach you how to act. Robert said that they do.
Howard said Rob Reiner was there yesterday and they were talking about The Sure Thing. Howard said Rob said that Robert was one of the four finalists for the lead role. Robert didn't know that. Howard asked how he didn't know that. Robert said maybe it was something he blocked out. Howard asked if he goes to the movie and sees John Cusack in it and thinks he could have done better. Robert said he doesn't think so. He said he may not have been paying that much attention to what was happening at that time of his life. Howard said that can be brutal to a guy being rejected like that. Robert said he came to enjoy the rejection. He said all he got was ''no'' for two years so he was like ''so what.''
Howard said here must be some fuck you in all of this. Robert said it comes on strong for a minute but he isn't that person.
Howard asked if Robert was roommates with Keifer Sutherland for a time. Robert said he was living with them for a while but not roommates. Howard said that they seem like two fucking crazy actors. Howard said he imagines it was a crazy time. Robert said they were almost always in a long term committed relationship. He said Keifer is a very disciplined guy. He said when they did the movie together he was the one who would wake him up to go to set. The movie they were doing was ''1969.'' Howard said Robert was dating Sarah Jessica Parker at the time. Robert said they were all good friends and he doesn't think Keifer was trying to get her. Howard said if he was dating a girl and the guy was talking to her about how crazy he is he'd be pissed. Robert said he is stirring up a lot of stuff so he might have to go back. He said that Keifer was just a shoulder to cry on. He said it's better him than some stranger.
Howard said when you grow up with the mug he has he had friends who fucked his girlfriends. Howard said he had sex with a girl and then his friend is with her. He said he was livid. Howard said he thinks with Robert girls come easy to him. He said that he has a certain confidence and a look. Robert said he wishes he had taken advantage of it more. He said he thinks he should have been standing on the street looking for nooki. Howard said anything must have gone with him and Sarah. Robert said she was normal and he was out of his mind. He said he did the best he could. Things fell apart though. Howard said he has worked things out with her though. He talked about that on the show.
Howard said Robert said he was going to come in and talk about any movie he has out. Howard said he's in Captain America: Civil War. Howard said he learned that Robert's cousin was a writer at Saturday Night Live. Robert said he has an uncle named Jim Downey but it's not that Jim Downey. Howard asked why people think it's his uncle or cousin. Robert said it's just Howard.
Howard asked if he hated working at Saturday Night Live. Robert said that everyone would agree that 1985 was the worst season of Saturday Night Live. He said that he was on that show with Anthony Michael Hall and they had Aykroyd and Belushi's old office. He said he was shooting Back to School so he remembers it fondly. Howard said it was a job but not a highlight. Robert said it was great training. He said he adores Lorne Michaels. He said that you can't underestimate what Lorne has contributed. He said it's still going on and still relevant and that's amazing.
Howard asked if he would have gone to the 40th anniversary show. Robert said he would have if he wasn't busy. Robert said that hosting is the most exciting week you can have on earth. Howard said he's never done it. Robert said he thinks Howard would be a great host. He told Howard how the week goes and how you do the show twice on Saturday. Howard said he was afraid that they would put him in some shitty skit. Howard said he told Lorne that when he was offered the chance to do it and he wanted Jackie and Fred to write everything. Robert said that he knows hosts who can do stuff like that and be part of it.
Howard said he read that Robert said that some of the independent movies suck and he doesn't want to do another one. Howard asked if he's afraid of doing something for a year and it comes out a piece of shit. Robert said he thinks he and Howard are similar in that way. He said he thinks he's figured out why something is going to suck ass. Howard said he has enough money that he can do that. Howard said the bigger he gets the more scared he gets. Robert said you can get brittle and rigid. He said he wants to do things with his wife and kids. He said his son is in a band that's opening for Bush. He said he wants to go out and see that. Howard said his son is doing his dream. Robert said he's right. He said his son's band is called The Dose.
Howard asked Robert if he can do a movie and let someone else wear the uniform if he's not needed. Robert said it depends on how he's feeling. He said sometimes he has to put a lot of time and energy into the part. He said sometimes he'll just do what's needed and leave them all alone. Robert said on the third Iron Man he didn't want to rehearse before doing wire stunts. He said he ended up busting himself up because of that.
Howard asked if the process getting in the Iron Man suit takes hours. Robert said on the first one it was like an Iron Maiden. He said that these days they can snap on parts of it and it's much easier. He said they have it down to a science. Robert said they have completely mastered it. Howard asked when he shows up at work. Robert said he shows up at 8am and they rehearse.
Howard said Tony Stark is supposed to be the playboy but they don't show him with a woman much. Howard said that Gwyneth was there but that wasn't that much. Robert said she's coming back but not in Captain America.
Howard asked about the new Captain America movie and what's going on in that. Robert said that he's for these super heroes registering so they know who they are but Captain America is against it. That's why this fight breaks out. Howard asked what his weakness is in the movie. Robert said if you deactivate the suit then maybe you can take him down. Howard asked how that would happen. He asked if it would be the heart. Robert said maybe. Howard asked how he would do it if he had to do it. Robert said it would have to be some kind of tech he wasn't expecting.
Howard asked if he's a comic book expert now. Robert said he's not. He said there was a minute that he thought that he was that guy but it takes a village. He said that he had people who had his back from the beginning. Howard asked if they have a coach who teaches the history if Iron Man. Robert said it's implicit being around it so long.
Howard said he'd just shoot the rockets out of his shoulders and blow Captain America up. Howard said he might figure it out listening to this right now though. Robert said when The Avengers came out Captain America became the team leader. Howard said he just has that shield. Robert said he has a lot. He said he's a super soldier.
Howard said that Spider-Man is in this. Howard asked who is on Iron Man's team. Robert said he recruits Spider-Man. He said that he is on his team. He said he has War Machine on his team. He said there's also Black Panther who is on his side in the poster. He said Tom Holland is playing Spider-Man. He said he's the real deal. Howard asked if anyone didn't hold their own in the movie. Robert said this is the right forum to do that in. Howard said he knows he can't name anyone. He asked what you do when someone isn't right for the role. Robert said you have to character assassinate the person. Howard asked if he's ever had to say anything to anyone. Robert said no.
Howard said they have the new Spider-Man. Robert said they have Chadwick Boseman playing Black Panther too. Howard said he doesn't know him. Robert said as soon as you see him you think ''that's a movie star.'' Robin said he was in ''42'' and he was great in that.
Howard asked if actors count lines and think they don't have enough lines. Robert said that none of these things are said. He said the Russo Brothers directed this and they had to figure out how everyone gets their number and their spotlight in the movie. He said the movie doesn't work unless they do.
Howard asked if Robert would bow out if he sees a shitty script. Robert said he freaks out if he sees one. He said they will make amendments. He said you can get worked up. Howard said that he's going to get a nice bonus if this movie makes $714 million. Howard said he gets 40 million and then he gets a bonus if it gets to 714 million. Howard said he wants to be there when the bonus money comes in. Howard asked what the bonus money is. Robert said Howard should tell him. Robert said he made that deal a year ago. He doesn't focus on it. Howard asked him to come in with his accountant so they can go over it.
Howard asked if Robert is in the stock market or what. Robert said he's doing what his Mrs. and their folks suggest. He said he trusts her with everything. Robert said that they brought in some people who know what they're doing. He said he likes real estate and he likes to be able to walk around the places. Howard asked how many homes he owns now. Robert said not many. He said some are for family members. Howard said that's a great move. Howard said when he's ready to sell it they get kicked out. Howard said that's a great plan.
Howard asked if he would ever write a book. Robert said he started to but he gave the advance back to the company. He said that he knew it would be something he'd be questioned about for the rest of his life.
Howard said he likes the character Ant-Man. Robert said he's got a great arc in the movie. Howard said they have Elizabeth Olsen in the movie too. Howard said she's hot. Robert said that she's the older sister of the Olsen Twins. He said she's great. Robert said he likes her a bunch. Howard asked if his wife cares when he hangs with these people. Robert said she knows it's fine. He said she knows what would happen if he did something.
Howard said Robert is still working on getting the Geppetto movie going. Robert said it's actually going to be a play so it's going to be delayed a bit.
Howard asked Robert about this charity foundation he started. Robert said he was thinking about the Royal Air Force and he called it RAF or Random Act Funding. Robert said he caught his wife in a good mood and suggested that name and she liked it. Howard said they're going to take a person to a private screening of the movie. Howard said he takes the to Jimmy Fallon and then out to pizza. Robert said that they're going to do a photo shoot too. Howard asked if it's a nightmare for him. Robert said it was all his idea. He said they collected a million and a half dollars from this thing. He said that the company is called Omaze. Howard asked if they vet the guy who will be with him all day. Robert said he's sure and he trusts god. Howard said that's awesome.
Howard asked if he's staying out of politics right now. Howard said as Iron Man he should come out and tell people what to do. Howard asked him to make an announcement as Iron Man. Robert said as Robert he's going to go vote. He said he believes Tony would say it's time to have some feminine in the White House. Howard said he's saying he'd vote for Hillary as Tony Stark.
Howard asked how many takes he does when he's acting. Robert said he likes to do two. Robert said that you have a data card in the camera these days so you can do it over and over. He said you do it a few times and you're done.
Howard said he has the feeling Tony would endorse Cruz. Robert said if you go along with his views in the movie he would back up whoever is for accountability. Robert said it's a great year. Howard said this election is really crazy. Robert said he thinks it's symbolic.
Howard said Robert wants to be there for his wife and kids. He asked if he really has time for that. Robert said he does. He said he has time that he can spend doing those things. Howard asked if he goes out to dinner with other couples do they expect him to pick up the tab. Robert said no. He said he does pick it up a lot though. Robert said he doesn't want to be the one staring at the card when the bill comes. Howard said he went to dinner with Robert and he thinks he picked up the bill. Howard said he went home thinking about how that son of a bitch didn't pick up the bill.
Howard asked Robert what he gets for someone as a gift when he goes to a wedding. Robert said he is really fortunate about people in his family not coming after him for money. Howard said Prince's family is going nuts over his stuff now. Howard said someone came in and opened up his vault where he keeps his music. Robert said that you might panic when a death comes along like that.
Howard asked Robert about the wedding thing again and if he gives money based on the kind of money he has or does he just want to be normal. Robert said you have to normalize whatever circumstance you're in. Howard asked Robert if he has someone ask him to show up in the Iron Man outfit would he do it. Robert said he hasn't been asked to do that.
Robert said they did a screening in Los Angeles for some kids and the guy who was co-hosting the event was raising funds for a place called House of Ruth. He said they did it up really nice and this guy was dressed up in a complete Iron Man suit in an 80 degree lobby taking pictures with everyone. He said it was wild.
Howard said he appreciates Robert coming in even though he doesn't need him to help with this. Robert said he has fun in there. He said he likes listening to the show best of all but he thinks it's fun coming in. Howard said a lot of people don't want Bobo calling in. Howard asked if he's a Bobo fan. Robert said the more controversial a subject is the more he wants it to continue. He said he likes it all. He said he likes the whole thing. He said more than all he likes the inter staff friction. Howard said Sal said today that Trump would make a good president because he gets tons of pussy. Robert said he has to back his play. He said no one knows who will do what well until they can show it. Robin said Sal thinks anyone who gets a lot of pussy is good at what they do. Robert said that is a truism.
Howard asked what Robert is doing today. Robert said he's going to go hang with the kids. He said he has a 4 year old and it's exhausting but he loves it. Howard asked if it's true that his dad sent him pot at summer camp. Robert said he thinks that every kid was getting it at that camp. Howard said his dad never would have done that for him.
Howard asked Robert if he can be the disciplinarian. Robert said he thinks he can. He said he defers to the more capable individuals in his life though.
Howard asked if Robert was shocked when JD announced he hadn't washed his sheets in a year. Robert said it kind of irks him when it's just a couple of days or weeks. He said that he can imagine it being forgotten for a long time if you're busy at work. Howard said JD is work centric.
Howard gave Robert a plug for Captain America: Civil War. Robert said this is one of the best Marvel movies ever. Howard said that Jon Favreau walked away from all of that. Robert said he did but he's doing great stuff like Jungle Book.
Howard gave Robert another plug and said that he'll be raking in the money once this opens. Howard said he should get into the Iron Man Suit and go down to Times Square and do the picture taking thing. He said then he lifts up the fucking thing and it's him. Robert said he thinks that's a great idea. He said it's a great goof. Robert said they should do it together. He said if Howard goes as Fartman he'll do it. Howard said he would do that with him. Howard said you walk up to Iron Man and tell the other fake ones to get the fuck off the street.
Howard asked if Robert is going to see Sarah Jessica Parker again. Gary came in and said that she might still be in the building. He said she was up there and Robert missed her by a second.
Howard said Robert has a good woman there with his wife. Howard asked if he has a Facebook account. Robert said he toes but it's a public thing. Howard said he can't be friends with him then. He said he'd do a private one but he didn't want to do that if Robert was just going to start it for that.
Howard said his wife called and said Robert did pay for dinner the night they went out. Howard said he didn't remember. Gary said Beth said the bill never came because Robert prepaid the bill. Howard said now he looks like an asshole. Howard said he'd go to dinner with him any time if he does that. Robert said that his wife shows him the pictures that Beth posts on her Instagram. He asked if it smells in the house at all. Howard said Beth takes such good care that it never smells. He said he gets pleasure from it. He said he's not bullshitting. He said it makes him feel like a human being doing good like that. Howard said he gets a lot of credit for what Beth does. Howard said just putting up with it gets him notice.
Howard asked if he's doing Fallon today. Robert said he's going to see his folks and do some screenings. He said he likes getting his dad and the boys together.
Howard said Robert has said it all. He thanked him for coming in and mentioned some of the things he talked about today. Howard wrapped up and went to break a short time later. As they went to break they played Lenny Kravitz performing ''Are You Gonna Go My Way'' on the Howard Stern Show.
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Howard came back and said he was watching Neil Young playing ''A Day in the Life'' and the Paul McCartney comes out. He said he loves the internet for that kind of stuff. Howard said when Paul came out it kind of threw off the whole thing but it was still good. Howard said Pearl Jam and Cheap Trick were doing stuff together too. Howard said it was really good. Howard had Fred look it up and play it. Howard said he was almost in tears listening to it. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Howard said it's time for some news. They played Robin into it with a song parody. Robin read about a biotech company that wants to bring people back from the dead. Howard said he loves that. He wants to come back. Robin said they are looking to get people to come back from traumatic brain injury. Howard said he would bring back Hank the Dwarf of Eric the Actor. Howard said if he had to choose he'd pick Hank. He said he loves Eric though. Howard said hank was cooperative. Howard said he knows it's controversial but he'd bring Hank back. Robin said that they'll bring them back but they'll still die. Howard said Hank would just drink himself to death again. Howard said they'd have to bring back Kinison too. Howard said they don't need Prince since he has a whole vault full of music.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that he is on Captain America's side because he's for individual rights like Bernie Sanders. They spent a minute on that.
Howard said they're saying that Trump has the republican nomination but Hillary still hasn't gotten the democratic nomination yet. Howard said he thinks he hasn't gotten enough praise for coming out and saying that Trump would get the nomination. Howard said it doesn't seem like a big deal now but he predicted it.
Howard said Ted Cruz doesn't know how to handle things. He was being heckled by a kid and he just doesn't know how to handle it. Howard played a clip and Ted said that if a child behaved like that in his house he'd be spanked. Howard said that's because you don't know how to talk to your kid. Howard said that there are a lot of idiots out there who don't know how to treat their kids. Gary said that Ted pulled over to the side of the road so he invited all of this. Howard had more audio of people yelling at Ted Cruz on the side of the road. Howard said he's like the Bobo of politics. Robin said Ted elbowed his wife in the face at his big announcement when he stepped down last night. Howard said he hit her like three times.
Howard took a call from a guy who said Ronnie the Robot was good on the show. He asked if he has a Flat Ronnie available. Howard said he's suspicious of his praise. Howard said he's not sure if he does. Howard said he doesn't think they do. The caller, Shandor, said that's fine. Howard said he has to go do a commercial anyway. He let Shandor go and did the live commercial read.
Howard took a call from Joey Boots who said the Robert Downey Jr. interview was great. Howard said he is awesome. Joey said he looks up to him. Joey said he's going through some shit himself right now. He said he's trying to work through it. He said it's embarrassing to have it played on the show. Howard asked about his cough. Joey said it's the worst and it's from smoking. Howard said Joey sounds worse than Jeff the Drunk. Joey said he really has to quit. Howard asked if he and High Pitch Erik aren't friends. Joey said since Pittsburgh they haven't spoken other than when Erik said he was going to commit suicide. Joey said it all comes down to this girl he's friends with. Joey said he kept calling Erik to take him to the hospital and he was ignoring him. He said it was all over this Jolie thing. Joey said Erik has him blocked on Twitter now. Joey said he's ignoring Erik now. He said he can't do it.
Howard said Joey is graduating from acting school next month. Joey said he's going on auditions and stuff. Robin said he can't do it all messed up though. Joey said she's right. Howard said the two of them being broken up is really strange. Joey said it's like a great comedy team being broken up. Howard said it's like dean Martin and Jerry Lewis with no comedic timing at all. Howard asked Joey to keep them up to date. Joey said he loves Erik but doesn't like him right now. Howard let him go after that.
Robin got back to her news and had some audio of people talking about how Trump has been doing taking the republican nomination. Robin said that the GOP is saying they have to unify the party.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he's a DJ out in Michigan. He said he's a transgender person. He said he wants to get back into radio. Howard asked if he still has a cock. The guy said he does. Howard said he's technically a woman though. The caller said his voice is very deep. Howard said he should work on getting a feminine voice. Howard said he can do it. The caller said he knows a guy named the Doc of Rock that Howard used to work with. Howard said if he wants to change his voice he should work on it. Howard did his woman's voice and told the caller to try. The guy tried it but it wasn't any different. Howard asked how much he weighs. The caller said he's 220. Howard said he's like a fat chick. Howard asked if she has big tits. She said she does. Howard said she must at 220. Howard asked her to slap her cock on the phone. She said she can't do that. She was in her car. Howard told her to pull over. Howard asked her to do it again. She slapped it on the phone. Howard said it doesn't sound that big. She said the hormones killed it.
Howard told the caller, Jamie, to just get on the air and do something. She asked if she can call back if things get better. Howard said things won't get better. Howard said they should hire her because transgender is in. Howard said she has to go for it and play it up. She asked Howard to talk to Mel for her. Howard said Mel isn't in the business. He let Jamie go after that. Howard said her name should be Barbara the Love Sponge or something like that. Not Jamie. He said maybe Donna Imus would be a good name. Howard said that's catchy. Howard said that guy has to market himself. Howard said maybe Cousin Lucy. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin had Howard play a clip of the Star Wars theme. Robin said today is May the 4th Be With You day. Robin said today is the say that all things Star Wars are celebrated. Robin said it's the unofficial holiday for Star Wars. Howard said it's very loserish. Robin said Daisy Ridley put a video out about a contest they have going on to win a trip to Ireland where they filmed the last scene of Episode VII
Robin read a story about a woman who lost her vision in 1995 and got it back after falling in her home. Robin said she hurt her neck and her vision had returned. Robin said she was also color blind originally and now she can see color.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he thinks Howard believes in the afterlife even though he doesn't think he does. He gave an explanation and said he thinks that Howard doesn't want Beth dating another man because he'd see it. Howard said he doesn't believe that's the case. Howard said if he dies and gets to heaven he's going to be so amazed that he won't worry about Beth. Howard said the guy says you'll be looking down like there's really a looking down. Howard said listen to this guy.
Robin read a story about the President honoring teachers yesterday. Robin had some audio of him talking about finding the magic in kids and nurturing it. Robin had audio of some teachers who were being honored.
Robin read a story about how the number 3 killer in the United States is medical error. Robin said that Heart disease and Cancer are the first and second. Robin read the details of the study that was done.
Robin read a story about a pregnant Connecticut woman who is testing positive for the Zika virus. Robin said she's going to have to be monitored closely. Howard asked if Gary is in touch with her yet for a future guest. Robin read about how the woman was in Central America and she's since gone back. Robin said the virus can cause some severe birth defects.
Robin had Howard play a clip of the Mr. Softee music sound track. Robin said the man who came up with that tune, Les Waas, is dead at 94. Robin said he also wrote the Chock Full O' Nuts theme. Robin said there are words to the Mr. Softee theme. Howard sang about Bobo not calling the show to that tune. Howard said that's the music you hear in a horror movie when someone is coming to get the children.
Robin read about Whoopi Goldberg possibly leaving The View. Robin said it's apparently contract time. Robin said she has told friends she won't be going back after her contract is up at the end of the season.
Robin read a story about Leslie Van Hoten who may get out on parole. Robin said that she was part of the Manson family. Robin said she has said she would have killed kids if they were in the houses they were going through. Howard asked why they have to release her. Howard said she killed people. Robin said Governor Jerry Brown will have the final say in that.
Robin read about the most popular search engine being Google Chrome. Howard said he uses that. Robin said it just became the most popular internet browser. It beat out Internet Explorer last month.
Robin read about how President Obama may put up a monument for the gay rights movement. Robin had some details about where that would be.
Robin read a story about Tom Brady being expected to sit out the first four games of the next season because of the suspension that was put on him last season.
Robin read a story about The Biggest Loser and how many of the contestants gain their weight back. Howard said if your motivation is a game show then of course you'll gain it back. Howard said you have to get to the bottom of why you eat so much. He said you have to do it for yourself. Howard said everyone loses the weight but they all gain it back if they have a contest on the show. Howard said they do it for the money and not for their health. Howard said Jason lost weight in a contest on the show and he gained it all back plus some. Howard said he likes to see a fat chick lose weight and turn hot. He said he hated it when a fat chick would lose weight and not turn hot when she lost weight. He said that's why he stopped watching the show.
Robin said she and Howard don't get why people are so into sports and freak out over things but a doctor says it's a good thing. Robin had a clip of a doctor talking about how positive it can be for some people.
Robin read a story about how they're putting together a festival for older rock bands. Robin said that it will be called Oldchella. Howard said they have a lot of big names. He wondered how they pay for them all. Robin said they must get sponsorships. They spent a few minutes talking about the bands that are supposed to be involved. Howard said he could never do that festival thing. He said he can't take a whole day to do that. He said it'll probably be old chicks running around topless instead of young chicks at Coachella.
Robin wrapped up and Howard ended the show around 11:15am.
Gary said they have meetings there and they were talking about Prince and Sal piped up about that song being about a German Sheppard's cock. Gary said Sal explained it and a couple of people were arguing with him. He said he wanted Sal to think it was the truth so they could get him on the air to talk about it.
Jon asked Scott about these songs facts that turn out to not be true. Jon said people state it as fact and it's not. He said they just assume that people believe it.
Jon said that Sal also had a theory about why Trump will be good because he gets a lot of pussy. Jon said this logic makes sense to Sal but no one else.
Jon asked Rahsaan what the poll is about today. Rahsaan said they're asking if you could bring one person back from the dead would it be Hank the Dwarf or Eric the Actor. Jon said he thinks that he agrees with Gary that it would be Hank. Gary said Hank was great with his knowledge of rock songs. Jon said he thinks Scott would be good at competing against Gary in Stump the Booey.
Jon took a call from a guy who brought up Sal and wondered if he's all about shtick or is he just that stupid. Jon said Howard talked about this and you want to think Sal is shticky and playing it up but nothing could be further from the truth. Gary said Sal isn't capable of coming up with this stuff. He said he won't call him stupid though.
Jon brought up the clips of his audio book that Howard played today. He said even he had to laugh at that stuff today. He said that it takes a lot of effort to do stuff like that.
Gary said they were talking about Prince tributes today and today all of the stations around the world are going to play ''Nothing Compares 2 U'' today. He said it's been the same amount of time that Prince wrote in the lyrics since he died. The guys spent a few more minutes talking about Prince before going to break.
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Jon took a call from a guy who hung up but was going to talk about the Wayne Siegel ad read. Jon said he has a strong New York accent. Gary said he thinks that's fair to say. Jon said when you do the live reads it's not heavy lifting but it's not easy to do. Gary said sometimes you're Frank Perdue and sometimes you're not. He said that Tom Carvel was the worst but he did it. Jon said Scott does them all the time and he knows it's tough. Scott said he tries not to think about it before hand. He said it is very tough to do to sound authentic. They spent a little more time talking about that.
Jon brought up Robert Downey Jr. and some of the things they talked about today. They brought up the dinner that Howard thought he paid for but Beth cleared up later saying that Robert paid for it. Jon said they talked about Iron Man and how he set the table for everyone else. Scott said that he really did set the table. He said without Iron Man they wouldn't have what they have now. They talked about what Robert was saying about the audition and how he knew he had to pull it off. Scott said it was the combination of Robert and Jon Favreau that made it so great.
Gary said he thought it was funny how Howard kept asking how someone would kill Iron Man and Robert seemed to be wondering if he wanted him to give away the whole plot. Jon said they also had the audio of Robert singing the Sting song. Gary said they're always surprised when someone can do two things very well. He said that most of the time they can only do one so they're shocked when they can do two.
Jon said they also had a discussion about Tony Stark and who he would back in the election. They spent a little time on that. They went to break a short time later.
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Jon took a call from a guy who said he thinks Sal doesn't like Bobo because Sal used to be Bobo. He said they're both obsessed with Howard and they're both from Long Island and they're both gimmicky. He said you either loved or hated Sal. Gary said he had him at ''Sal used to be Bobo.'' He said he's absolutely right. Jon played a clip of Sal going off on Bobo today.
Jon said Sal might think that this is a way to endear himself to the crowd because he knows the audience doesn't like Bobo. Gary said that he thinks it's a jumping on the bandwagon thing too. Gary said it blows him away what irritates Sal. He said he's not sure why Bobo bothers him so much. Jon said he thinks Bobo handled himself well. Gary said he's struggling these days. He said he thinks he has to be who he is and just deal with it. He said that he'll never figure out what Howard wants him to be.
Jon said when they got into the Hank and Eric the Actor thing that's when people get passionate. He said it's hard to choose one. Gary said Hank and Eric never crossed over. He said Hank is a lot older. He said you have to be a long time listener to know Hank. He said he was a one of a kind. He said he was funny and smart under that drunkenness.
Rahsaan said the results are a lot closer than he expected them to be. Gary said he thinks Eric won but he wanted Hank to win. He said Hank died in 2001 2 days before 9/11. He said he got dropped like Chyna did with Prince dying.
Jon said he thinks Eric won too but Hank would have gotten his vote. Rahsaan said that Eric got 51 percent over Hank's 49. He said he's not surprised though. He said you don't know what you've got until it's gone.
Jon got in some plugs for today's Sternthology and wrapped up the show. They were done around 11:55am.
Jon said he wants to talk about the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame since Howard watched it and seemed to enjoy it. Gary said he watched it too. He said he thinks the whole event was over 5 hours. He said Howard was invited but wasn't able to go. Jon said no way Howard would make it through all of that. Ahmet said he has very little respect for the hall of fame because of the way they treated his father. Gary said he's not familiar with that. Ahmet said it's a feud for him. He said he doesn't like anyone bashing his dad. He said he was pushed off the stage by a fan once and he broke his neck and arm and Lou Reed went on a tirade about how much he disliked his father. He said that started a blood vendetta against the guy. He said they asked Lou to induct his father into the hall of fame so he was wondering what they were thinking.
Gary said Howard has been a fan of his dad's his whole life. Ahmet said they were talking about musical geniuses once and he has a bone to pick with Howard. He said Howard said Frank is not a genius. Gary said different day different answer. Gary said he remembers when they were at WNBC and Frank Zappa was on the show. Gary said they were playing Frank's music on this station and they ended up singing ''Louie, Louie'' together. Lee said they had a great interaction together. Ahmet said his dad was a fan of Howard's. He said he loves hearing those old interviews. He said they would talk about things that were so great.
Jon said Howard still thinks Frank was a great guest because he would do things that made the host uncomfortable. Jon said that was before people were doing that. Ahmet said he's a bonehead himself. He said Howard and his dad had this superpower where they don't stutter and they don't ramble on like he's doing right now. He said they get directly to the point and it's incredible. Ahmet said he's got a delay in his headset and it's driving him crazy. Jon told him they'll take a break and fix it. They went to break after that. They played Frank Zappa's ''Catholic Girls'' as they were going to break.
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Jon asked Ahmet what he thinks about that. Ahmet said that it's called Rock & Roll and he thinks that maybe it should be just the Music Hall of Fame. Gary said that he thought Ice Cube talking about how they feel like they're rock and roll. Ahmet said that he agrees they should be honored but they're not Rock & Roll. He said maybe there should be a name change to the hall of fame. Then maybe they'd do a better job. Lee agreed with Ahmet on that.
Gary asked if Johnny Cash is in the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. Gary said he thinks he is. He said if they call it the music hall of fame then it opens it up to any type of music. Jon said he doesn't think of Madonna when he thinks of the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he's a big fan of Ahmet's dad. He said he saw an article last week in Rolling Stone and he wants to know if they think Little Feat should be in it like Rolling Stone said. Gary said they are a great band but he doesn't love them. He said he's not sure they should be in. He said they don't come to mind when they come up.
Lee asked about the voting in the hall of fame and Gary told him how it works for him and Jon. They spent a little more time talking about some of the bands they'd like to see in the hall of fame.
Jon took a call from a guy who said Gary is a moron for questioning Johnny Cash being in the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. He said he was a rock and roll singer when he started out. Gary said he didn't question if he should be in, he questioned if he is in it. Rahsaan said Gary was just getting clarification. He wasn't questioning him on being in it. The caller kept calling him ''John Cash'' so Gary wondered if he's a close friend. Gary said he doesn't know why he calls him John Cash. Gary said in the 50s Johnny was part of rock and roll but he became a country artist. He said he was thinking more of Merle Haggard. He said some rock people might say he should be in. They went to break after that.
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Jon took a call from a woman who said she's a fan of celebrity deaths and she wonders why Frank doesn't have a headstone and he's got an unmarked grave. Ahmet asked if she's really a fan of people dying. She said she finds it interesting to pay respect to celebrities and their graves. Jon asked if there's a best cemetery to go visit. The caller said she's been to some in California and there are a few celebrities in the one that Frank is in. She said they give out maps there. Gary said that's not creepy at all. Ahmet said his father is in an unmarked grave and the reason for that is because his dad talked to his mother about it and this was her best friend. He said his mother recently passed and he thinks part of the sadness there was that Frank didn't want one. He didn't care about the notoriety. He said he thinks it was a little morbid in the conversation but his father said if there was one it should say ''Too little, too late.'' He said it was his father's wishes not to have one so that's why there isn't one.
Gary asked if he thinks there would be a lot of people visiting it if there was one. Ahmet said he does recall his mother trying to speak to other artists about getting a headstone that wouldn't be defaced and maybe play music. Ahmet said he thinks there should be one but it would be the family's call on that.
Jon said he knows how big a fan Ahmet is and he wonders how he feels when Howard is talking about his dad. He said Howard is a big fan of all of the family. Jon said it affects people in different ways. Jon asked how he reacts when his name comes up. Ahmet said he's such a fan of Howard so when he was talking about the videos on Facebook he put up that was thrilling. He said it made his day. He said he misses the connection to his dad so now he's a collector of the good and the bad. He said it's all interesting to him. He said there are photos and videos of him but it's not like having him there to answer his questions or give him a hug. He said when he hears Howard talking about his dad it's like a double combo platter of awesome.
Gary said earlier in the week Howard was talking about Ahmet and the letter he posted about his brother. He said he thinks that Frank would be bummed out so much over that. Ahmet said he agrees. He said he's not trying to get in the way of Dweezil playing the music. He said he can play the music.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that Prince was found in an elevator and one of the lyrics in one of his songs he had a lyric about an elevator. He asked what they think about that. Gary said he loves conspiracy guys like that. He said he bets every artist has the word Elevator in it. He said he doesn't think that he planned it out or anything like that. Ahmet said he just wants to agree with crazy so he thinks he has something there.
Jon took a call from a woman who asked if Ralph is a virgin or has he had sex before. Gary said Ralph is Howard's best friend and stylist. He said that he's been Howard's friend for 30 years. He said Ralph is the opposite of a virgin. He said he's been with women and they have met them so they know they're real.
Jon had Rahsaan get in the plugs for today's Sternthology. Ahmet also talked a bit about the movie they're making about his father and how that all got started. They got in some more plugs and wrapped up the show. They were done around Noon.
Jon said he wants to start off with Robert Downey Jr. He said he did say he would be on the show whenever he had something to promote. He has lived up to that. He is a regular on the show.
Jon brought up how Robert did the song with Sting and how he had an album out in 2004 when things weren't going so good. Gary said everyone wants to try a little of everything but he thinks he can dabble in anything and he'll be fine.
Jon said Rob Reiner crossed over very well going from TV to movies. He said he had to overcome being Carl Reiner's son and being Meathead on All in the Family. Gary said that it is a bad nickname to overcome. Gary said it's like Baba Booey or Kramer. Jon asked if Gary has that with people trying to get past that Baba Booey thing. Gary said if someone wants to have a meeting with him they know the name and if they listen to the show they might get it.
Jon took a call from a guy who asked if Robert Downey Jr. gets treated like anyone else when he comes in. Gary said everyone gets class A treatment there so he's treated like everyone else. Jon said he thinks it's cool when big stars come in by themselves. He said sometimes they have a huge entourage. Gary said when Robert Downey Jr. comes up the excitement level is up but they do treat everyone the same. He said he's not looking to have his ass kissed. Gary said they had Adam Sandler up before Christmas and he spent the entire time talking to everyone out in the hallway. Jon said he was impressed by that. He said he was a very personable guy. He said they had heard that but people don't always live up to things like that. Gary said sometimes people need that time to be left alone to get your head in the game. Jon said Howard is like that when he goes to do a late night show appearance. He said he wants to be nice to everyone but he has to focus on the task at hand.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he thought that Rob Reiner interview was one of Howard's best in a while. He said that he talked about his son going through the drug problem and that got him thinking about how he has to think about being a better father himself. Gary said he thinks it was interesting to have Rob's son there telling the story. He said it was very emotional Jon said Nick was pretty shaken up when he came on the Wrap Up Show later that day.
Jon took a call from a woman who said she bought the Robert Downey Jr. album when it was out. She said he was in a bad place at the time. She said that he had a bit part on Ally McBeal and he did a cover of The River that's really good. Jon said he knows what she's talking about. They went to break after that.
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Jon talked to Justin and Alanna about Tiny and his life. Gary talked about what was interesting about him for the show. Stewart told some stories about Tiny Tim too. Jon said Tiny was up for anything and he recorded that Santa Claus song about him having ''the AIDS.'' Gary said the song is insanely insulting and crazy. He said Tiny sat across from Howard asking him to promote it on the show.
Gary said they have to talk about Tiny's love life too. They spent a little time talking about what they knew about Tiny's love life. Jon and Gary talked to Stewart about working with Tiny. This went on for about 10 minutes.
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Gary said Howard would have been flying all over the country already and getting ready for the live shows. He said he thinks he's already in a better place.
Jon asked what happened with Robin in the kitchen. Gary said they got emails the week before saying the kitchen was closed to be renovated or cleaned. Gary said the kitchen is right on the side when you leave their compound. He said signs were up saying it was closed. They had crime scene tape and the lights were off so there were hurdles. He said Robin needed club soda and you can see it in there. Gary said you could see the room was in disarray. He said Robin tried to move a big coffee machine and it toppled over. He said it was like knocking over a vending machine.
Jon took a call from a John from Maryland who said Robin is the newswoman and he wonders if she doesn't see herself ding something wrong and not admitting to it or is she just on the dingy side. Gary said he thinks the truth is that she was embarrassed and she hoped it would go away. Gary said they won't let it go away on the show though. Jon said he thinks a lot of people would do the same thing.
Gary said they once accused Sal of wearing makeup and he claimed he didn't wear it. He said they caught him. Jon said it was great the way they caught him. He said Ronnie was able to spot his bag that he threw out.
Jon asked Gary and Rahsaan what the most shocking thing is that Sal didn't know. Gary said there are two for him. He said he was unsure of who was on which side in World War II. He said the second one was when he was unsure who was on which side in the Civil War. Rahsaan said he also thought that World War I was the first on in the history of man. Jon said Sal never says ''I don't know'' and he has to give him credit for that. He asked if he has learned anything. Rahsaan said he thinks he does. He said 2 months from now he may not remember it. Gary wondered how far Sal could get if you asked him the order of presidents. Rahsaan said when you teach him in the moment he knows it but he doesn't retain it. Gary said people think they pick on Sal because they're arrogant but they really do it because it's stuff you should know when you go from 6th to 7th grade.
Jon took a call from a guy who asked Jon about Sour Shoes calling him all the time and how he feels about that. Jon said he's not annoyed at all. He said he's honored. He said the only issue he has is that his voicemail is full when he comes in on Monday. He said that he leaves messages that are 5 minutes long. He said that he's so amazingly talented that you can't help but be entertained by it. Gary said Sour calls everyone at Sirius too. He said that it's not just them. Gary said he was in the hall and he head Sour doing another show and he does it for 15 minutes at a time. Jon said Sour is tremendously entertaining. Rahsaan said he even gets calls in his office. Gary said he might just call every number in sequence. Gary said he used to call him in his office at K-Rock and they'd play Stump the Booey.
Jon had Rahsaan give them a rundown of what they had coming up on Sternthology today. They wrapped up and ended the show around 11:50am.