Howard said he started his vacation last Monday night when he went to Scores. Ronnie the Limo Driver decided to watch the Giants football game there so everyone went to do that. Howard said he also ate dinner there. Artie Lange was there and he spent tons of money on the dancers. He also bet on the Giants and lost some money. He said he spent about $2000 of his own money at Scores and he lost another $2000 on the football game.
Howard said he didn't see Artie much that night even though he kept telling Lonnie from Scores to bring him into the Champagne room. As Howard was talking to the guys he pointed out how gray Ronnie's hair was. He also said that Fred's hair was really gray and very long. Artie said Fred looks like a ''friendly lion'' with the long gray hair and the beard.
Howard took a break and continued his vacation discussion. He said that Nikki Ziering was at Scores with the guys. Howard said she was really cool to hang out with but he didn't give many details. He changed subjects when he brought up Ralph and how he gets chicks all the time. He said Ralph ended up inviting him to a Kid Rock party at a club called Slate. Howard said there were strippers dancing on pool tables and stuff like that. Howard said he saw Kid Rock and Pamela Anderson real quick but he didn't hang out with them.
Howard quickly played the answering machine message that Robin left on Gary's machine. She really sounded awful and she could barely speak.
Howard spent a few minutes talking about his Thanksgiving dinner. His kids made him do a regular meal instead of getting a catered meal. Howard and his mother organized their dinner and Howard stood his ground when she told him to have it buffet style and he wanted to serve it like a normal dinner.
Howard brought up the fact that Gary was the phone-a-friend lifeline for Veronica Webb on supermodel ''Who Wants to be a Millionaire'' last week. Howard said the models on the show were really stupid and gave some examples of the questions they had and the dumb answers they gave. Then he played an audio clip of the question that Gary had to help out on. It was an art question that was something like ''In 1919 what artist created L.H.O.O.Q. by adding a moustache to the Mona Lisa?'' Veronica didn't know the answer so she used Gary as her lifeline. Gary didn't have a clue either. He gave her the wrong answer but told her he wasn't very sure so she walked away with the $250,000 that she'd gotten up to.
One of the strippers that Howard met at the Kid Rock party last week called in. Howard said he was talking to her and she told him that she's a sophomore in college. She's only 19 years old and her name is Emily, the same as his daughter. He said he was nice to her but he could never do anything with a 19 year old because his daughter is almost that old. He said he later found out that his buddy Ralph didn't care about her age and he made out with her. Emily said she didn't kiss him but she did use her hand on him when Ralph went home with her and her friend. She claims that her friend was making out with him but she wasn't. Howard said he heard otherwise and that both of them were making out with him. Either way Ralph had some fun with the girls. Howard spent a couple of minutes talking to Emily but then got tired of it and got back to other stuff.
Last week Howard had a quick discussion about Britney Spears and her new song ''I'm a Slave 4 U.'' He likes the video and wondered if the song would stand up without the visual. He played about 5 notes from the song and Artie blurted out ''No!'' Howard then moved on and spent a short time talking about some of the cool videos he's seen on MTV's TRL. He mentioned P.O.D. and Blink 182 videos that he enjoys. He later played some clips of the songs that he likes. He also admitted that he's a fan of the female singer Pink. He was embarrassed to admit that but Gary didn't think it was so bad to like her. He told Howard that she's a big fan of the show and she wanted to come on sometime.
Howard said ''Survivor'' did it all wrong this season because they had good looking guys but no hot chicks. Clarence said he thought some of the women were pretty tight though.
Howard asked Clarence what he's doing for a living right now. He said he's bartending in Detroit right now. Howard figures he must be getting laid quite a bit because he's a good looking guy. Clarence said he does get to talk to quite a few women in his line of work but he has to be careful who he goes with.
Howard asked Clarence about the time he ate his tribe's can of beans when no one was around. Clarence claims that he was trying to help this one woman who was sick. He said that after not eating for 36 hours those beans started looking really good to him so he finished off the can. Howard seems to think that's what got him kicked off the show.
Howard spent a short time talking to Clarence about some of the other people who were on the show with him. Clarence said that Tom called him ''boy'' on a couple of occasions and he had to hold back from popping him in the mouth. He said he got along with him pretty well but that ''boy'' comment could have gotten him in big trouble. Howard took a few phone calls after that and a couple of people took advantage of the ''boy'' comment and made some racist comments of their own to Clarence. He seemed to take them pretty well and just let them go by. Howard took a few more phone calls and spent a couple of minutes talking to Clarence before he wrapped up the interview.
Howard has said in the past that he thinks that Joanie might be a man. That came up soon after she came in this morning. She fired back by making fun of Howard's flabby ass. Howard said it's not that bad and ended up showing it to her. She also showed Howard her ass and Artie Lange said it looked like Arnold Schwarzenegger's. Howard also thinks that she might have used steroids to get her body built up the way it is. She swears that she never used steroids though. Howard said he knows women who have used steroids and they have a similar voice to Joanie's. She said she knows it's an unusual voice but it's not from using steroids. Howard continued to talk about this but Joanie said she was getting insulted by his comments. She told Howard she thinks that he might be gay or he has a crush on her so he's picking on her like a high school kid would. Howard said that's absolutely untrue. He told her he'd take her into the bathroom and bang her to prove that he's not gay though.
Howard spent some time talking to Joanie about her relationship with Triple H from the WWF. She dated him for 5 years and then found out that he was cheating on her with Stephanie McMahon in real life. It wasn't part of the whole WWF act. Joanie said she was disappointed in Stephanie for being unprofessional in her job by dating one of her employees but she wasn't mad at her. It was Triple H's choice to go with her so Joanie blames him for what happened.
Joanie also spoke a little bit about being dropped from the WWF when Vince McMahon didn't renew her contract. She said she was offered a contract but she turned it down because she didn't feel it was enough. She also said that it might have had something to do with Stephanie dating Triple H. She said there were three of them and one of them had to go.
Howard spoke to Joanie about her latest ''Playboy'' shoot. He checked out some of the pictures and saw her ass which he called a ''butter ass'' when The Rock was on the show a few months ago. Joanie said that she didn't appreciate that and after seeing the Playboy shots there's no way he could call it a butter-ass. Howard asked her if he could bounce a quarter off of it to see just how tight it was. She refused to do it though. Artie Lange asked her if he would bounce off her ass if he jumped on it too.
Howard spoke to Joanie about her dating habits and how long it takes to get in her pants. She told Howard that it takes weeks to get to second base and a ''long time'' to get in her pants. Artie asked if there were any ''surprises'' when a guy finally gets to third base. She told Artie he'd never find out. She said it might take months to actually go to bed with her.
Howard wrapped up the interview with a couple of phone calls and plugs for Joanie. She's in ''Playboy'' this month and she'll be on ''Celebrity Fear Factor. Joanie will be signing copies of ''Playboy'' at the Virgin Megastore in Union Square today at 6pm. She'll be appearing at the Exotic Erotic Ball on Wednesday night and you can find out more about that at ExoticEroticBall.com or at BodyByJoanie.com
Howard quickly mentioned that he'll be back on the air in Phoenix, Arizona in the near future. He didn't give any other info though.
Howard had a whole breakdown of the mail they get at the station. It gave percentages of how many pieces of mail were about different subjects on the show. The breakdown included what percentage of people don't like Artie Lange and want Jackie back and vice versa. It was pretty interesting stuff.
Howard read an article about Scott Weiland of Stone Temple Pilots getting arrested in Las Vegas last week. Scott allegedly grabbed his wife and pushed her out of the way when she wouldn't let him leave his room. Howard said he has to get him on the show now because he was just talking about how much he loves his wife the last time he was on.
Howard took a couple of phone calls and Extreme Fan Bobo was one of them. He asked Howard who he thinks is the most pussy-whipped on the show. Howard said Gary is the most pussy-whipped and Stuttering John is the least. That led to a discussion about how great Gary used to have it before he got married. He used to date tons of chicks and Howard used to admire him for that. Now the roles are reversed and Gary admires Howard because he's back to dating. Bobo wondered if Howard has gotten any happier in his life since he started dating. Howard said he'll never be happy and he's still in therapy. He also told a story about having a dream one night in which he was hugging his 8 year old in a field. He said he was crying in the dream and when he woke up he was still crying and wasn't able to stop for an hour. That probably surprised a few people because Howard says he hardly ever cries over anything.
Bobo had a ''Dead or Alive'' game to play with Howard. He started off with Fred ''Rerun'' Berry and said that he's dead but everyone else on the show said that he's still alive. He gave a few other names for everyone to guess at but Howard and the crew were able to guess them all correct. Howard gave up on the call after a few minutes.
Howard read a few more articles from the news before ending the show today. He read an article about Nikki Ziering who was on the show last week. He also read an article about Martha Stewart who apparently weighs over 200 pounds now.
Howard got word that Carrie the intern was giving advice to a caller about anal sex. She came in and ended up talking to Howard about dildos and stuff like that. Stuttering John said that Carrie had a big black dildo in her bag today. That led to Howard talking about how he had to get some dildos for a friend of his. Someone sent some over for him and he was embarrassed to carry them to the woman who wanted them so he ended up giving them to his girlfriend who ended up dropping them on the street when the bag broke. Then she refused to get rid of them so Howard had to take them back to the station. Howard thought that's how Carrie ended up with it but she had another explanation for it. She said she got it accidentally in a promotional package they got at the station. After that conversation Howard wrapped up the show.
Howard said he heard that John Stamos' TV show ''Thieves'' has been canceled. He thinks that all he had to do was film the time John and his wife were up at his apartment half naked and it would have been a ratings grabber.
Howard went out to dinner with his daughter last night so he spent a short time talking about that too. He ended up talking about how sad he gets when he hangs out with his kids because he starts thinking of his failed marriage.
Howard said Will Smith was on Oprah yesterday and it was one big ass kissing show. He didn't have tape of the interview to play today so he and Artie just made fun of Muhammad Ali for a few minutes.
A listener called in with a theory about why Howard's marriage ''jumped the shark.'' The guy thinks that the scene in ''Private Parts'' where Howard's real wife appeared as a secretary might have had something to do with it because she was so out of focus that you couldn't recognize her. Howard said that might have had something to do with it.
Howard got back to his Oprah discussion. This time he talked about how Will Smith and his wife Jada were trying to talk ''black'' to Oprah. He said they'd break out of their normal way of talking into a ''black'' thing that didn't sound quite right. Melrose Larry Green called in with tape from the show so Howard let him play it while he gave the play by play. Melrose also had tape of Carson Daly mentioning Howard's name on ''Access Hollywood'' but Howard had that tape too. Howard played that and Carson talks about how he found out Jennifer Love Hewitt had broken up with him when Howard mentioned it on his show.
KC came in to tell a story about his grandmother's funeral. He said that the priest at the wake forgot his grandmother's name and said Gigi instead of Virginia. Then the priest introduced his uncle Dennis as Bill. The funniest part of the story was that KC wasn't sure if it was called a wake or not and he wasn't sure if it was a priest or a deacon. He's just as dopey as the priest that screwed up the names.
Melrose Larry Green called back to play more tape from yesterday's Oprah show. This time he had better examples of Jada Pinkett Smith switching from ''white'' to ''black'' talk
Howard talked about a few of the stunts they have the celebrities doing on the show. He also said that the reviews of the show are mostly good but there are some reviewers who don't think that Joe Rogan is a good host. They seem to think that he sucks the life out of the show. Howard disagrees and thinks that he's good on the show.
Joe told Howard there are more celebrity editions in the works including a WWF and a Playboy version. Tonight's episode airs at 8pm on NBC.
Howard also tried asking Greg about his sexual habits but Greg was trying to keep some of that quiet. At one point Howard asked him when he had anal sex last but he wouldn't give him an answer. You can find out more about the gay cologne at 10Percent.com
After the break Howard came back to play a new game. Gary told him he had a Microsoft Xbox video game unit to give away so he had a listener on the phone to play. Howard said that after the September 11th tragedy a lot of listeners sent in songs and they sounded pretty bad. Record companies have also released a bunch of bad songs that don't sound all that different than the ones Howard gets. The game was to try and guess which type of song Howard was playing. This guy Tiny was on the phone to play. Howard played him three songs and Tiny guessed them all right. After the game Howard told Gary it was too easy. Howard then continued to play some of the songs that Gary had for him to listen to.
After that Howard had a couple of people play Gay Chicken, another new game that KC mentioned. KC played Gay Chicken with his drinking buddies one time. What they do is sit next to another guy, put their hands on each other's thighs and take turns moving their hands farther and farther up the thigh toward the genital area. Whoever chickens out first loses. Gary and KC played first. KC freaked out within 15 seconds. Howard then had KC play against Scott DePace from E!. Howard thinks that Scott might be gay so he had him come in to play for an Xbox. DePace and KC played the game for about 5 minutes. They slowly took turns moving their hands up each others thighs until KC finally freaked out and gave up.
Howard was talking about some of the news about Afghanistan and said that he read in the paper that the Polish Marines had invaded Bloomingdales department store when they saw that Bed Linens were on the fourth floor... Bed Linens, Bin Laden, it's a joke.
Howard had tape from the Craig Kilborn show where a guest talks about some penis stuff. Howard said he knew that it wouldn't make it through his censor, Andre, if he played it on the air but it made it on CBS network TV. Howard played the clip but it was cut off by Andre who hit the delay button. Howard was right. He said he had to get off the subject because he knew he'd get pissed off if he kept talking about how he ''changed the landscape'' of TV and Radio by paving the way for people to talk about subjects like that and he's the one who takes the fall for it.
Howard played a clip of Barbara Walters interviewing George Clooney and some of the other cast members from ''Ocean's Eleven.'' After playing the clip Gary told Howard how he tried to get George on the show again by calling his publicist. The publicist apparently told Gary that George is only doing a few shows and he's only doing TV. Gary had to remind the publicist that they're on TV almost every night of the week. Clooney has been on the show before but for some reason he's not doing it this time even though he's in town this week.
Howard is really into this new Pink song ''Get the Party Started.'' He said that he's been seeing the video on MTV's TRL lately and he really likes it. He said he thinks Pink is pretty cute but she's ugly enough that she's probably ''getable.'' He played a clip of the song and talked about it for a couple of minutes.
Howard filled Robin in on the discussion they had about the Oprah Winfrey show with Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith during yesterday's show.
Gary came into the studio when Howard was talking about how he tells stories during the breaks. Howard said his stories are okay but he doesn't want to hear them a second time when he tells them to the audience. Then Howard noticed that Gary had some kind of lip gloss on. Stuttering John told Howard he has to see Gary put the lip balm on because it's a funny sight. Gary put some on just to satisfy them. Howard then played a new song that Sal the Stockbroker created about Gary. It's a spoof of a Johnny Rebel song called ''Baba Nigga Booey.'' Check that out over at HorseToothJackass.com
Gary had a story to tell about MTV's ''Real World.'' The cast was working for a record company earlier in the year and they came up to Howard's station to push a record. A couple of the DJs at the station were busting balls by asking a bunch of questions that the ''Real World'' kids couldn't answer. They ended up coming back a week later with more information. Howard played a clip from the ''Real World'' to let us hear how the DJs goofed on them.
Howard told Robin about the game of ''Gay Chicken'' that they played during yesterday's show. Scott DePace and KC played against each other. DePace ended up winning an Xbox video game system when KC freaked out and ran off. DePace was thrilled that he won but he also said he was feeling kind of gay because of the way he won. If that game wasn't gay enough, KC said that he and his drinking buddies used to play a card game called ''Asshole.'' The loser had to go outside and let the other guys throw snowballs at his ass. He said there was another game where guys had to go out, pull down their pants and leave a naked ass print in the snow. There sure is a lot of ass stuff going on with KC and his buddies.
Howard said that the whole crew got VIP Hooters cards which entitles them to cut to the front of the line at a Hooters restaurant. It also gets you 50% off your bill. Howard said he didn't think he'd ever use the card so when a caller asked if he could have it Howard gave it to him. Artie said that he got the ''Jackie Martling'' Hooters VIP card since he took over for Jackie.
A listener in the Baltimore area called in to complain about how WJFK runs traffic reports over Howard's show. He said they don't even wait for a commercial break, they just run the report right over the show. Howard had Gary get in touch with the board operator to find out what the problem is. Gary got the wrong guy the first time because they have two WJFK stations, one on FM and one on AM.
Howard read an article about Paul Reubens (Pee Wee Herman) whose house was raided for kiddie porn. The article said the police had a search warrant but they were let in voluntarily. They apparently took out his giant porn collection. Howard spent a few minutes talking about it and making fun of Pee Wee's porn collection.
Melrose Larry Green called in and played a clip of George Clooney calling Bill O'Reilly a ''black Irishman'' on David Letterman's show last night. Howard spent a couple of minutes defending Bill O'Reilly.
Howard was going to put this guy on the phone who duct tapes women and then farts in their faces. The guy turned out to be so annoying that Howard didn't get one question out for him. The guy just shouted out nonsense so Howard hung up on him.
Howard finally got around to playing the tape of the Larry King show that he has been talking about for the past couple of days. King interviewed Imus and brought up the stuff that Howard said about his ''cancer ranch.'' Imus joked that all of the stuff Howard said was true and he's finally been found out. Howard went on to goof on the way Imus talks and the fact that his small child was there calling him ''daddy'' over and over again during the interview.
Howard found out that Megan has a boyfriend and she told him that he's a dirt bike mechanic. She also told Howard that she has brought home women for him to mess around with.
After talking to her for a few minutes Howard offered her the chance to play the wheel of sex. Howard told her he'd give her 5 plugs for whatever she's plugging. He had a bunch of things on a wheel that she had to spin and whatever it landed on she had to do. Those things included stuff like:
Howard had Megan's (almost) sister-in-law Amanda come in to spin the wheel of sex too. Megan said she was thinking of seducing her so Howard wanted to check her out. He spoke to her for a couple of minutes and then had her spin the wheel of sex. She didn't hesitate a second to spin the wheel. It ended up on the same thing as Megan got. Howard had her spin it a few more times and it kept coming up on the same thing. It finally ended up on the bagels and cream cheese section. Howard sent Amanda off to the bathroom to get changed. She came back out and they smeared the cream cheese on her ass. Howard said she had a nice ass as he was putting the cheese on. When he was done Howard threw the first bagel. He got a perfect shot according to everyone in the studio. The bagels were all sticking to her ass as they threw them. After the fun Howard had Megan and Amanda kissing each other. There was some tongue involved according to Artie who yelled out ''Tongue!'' as they kissed. Howard questioned the two of them for a while and tried to find out what they really do together. Megan didn't want her boyfriend Keith to leave her so she wasn't talking much. They admitted that they sleep in the same bed together naked but they wouldn't say what else they do. Howard then had them make out with each other again before ending the interview.
Howard wrapped up the interview and said that you can find out more about Megan at Megan-Mason.com or at Penthouse.com. She's featured in the January 2002 issue of Penthouse.
Later in the show Howard announced that this segment will air on E! tonight and tomorrow night at 11pm.
Howard said that he thinks he's still friends with Jackie and if another project comes up in the future, he wouldn't hesitate to include him. Meanwhile, Jackie is still telling people he thinks there's something wrong between them and he doesn't understand why Howard won't take him back. Artie Lange has replaced Jackie now and he says he's ecstatic to be on the show. He doesn't demand any plugs for his stuff and he's having fun on the show. Howard told him it's a pleasure to work with him and he's happy he's on board. The discussion went on for about 25 minutes or so and there was a lot of stuff said. Stuttering John was laughing hysterically for some reason whenever they'd talk about what a mistake it was. Robin said that John really does enjoy other people's misery. John said that Jackie has stopped drinking so they don't have that much in common anymore.
A listener called in to goof on Artie Lange's bald spot that was prominently featured on Howard's E! show last night. Artie said he used to have a makeup person who would cover it up. Howard offered to have his hair dresser Toni do something for him but Artie wasn't sure he wanted to come in any earlier than he already does. This led to everyone discussing hair loss and what Artie can do about it. Everyone had suggestions for him but he's not sure what he's going to do.
Gary said he had a great time on the show yesterday during Megan Mason's appearance where she spun the Wheel of Sex. Howard thought it was a great show too. The guys thought that Howard could have had both of those chicks who were on yesterday. They were all over him after the interview. The Wheel of Sex really got things going during that interview.
Stuttering John was talking to Howard and he tried to say something about not being inhibited but he couldn't think of the word he wanted. Howard tried to help him figure it out but John's brain wasn't working. To draw attention away from him he said he couldn't think of the word while he was looking at Gary's lips that were covered in lip balm. He said it was really disturbing. Howard said he gave Gary some Kiehl's for his lips and he was overdosing on the stuff. Gary couldn't believe that John actually changed the subject that way. John never did figure out the right word.
This woman Jennifer called in and said that she's hotter than Megan Mason and she'd be willing to spin the Wheel of Sex a couple of times. Howard didn't think she could be that hot but he invited her down for tomorrow's show.
A listener called in and said he got on Larry King last night and asked Senator John McCain if he listens to Howard. McCain said he goes on Imus' show and enjoys it because he has ''smart people'' on his show, unlike Howard's show. Howard said he likes McCain but now that he knows he doesn't like him he might have to hate him. The caller had one other phony phone call that he played for Howard.
Howard's ex-wife Alison has remarried. A listener brought that up when he called in. Howard knew about it but he hadn't mentioned it on the air. The guy she married is apparently a ''gazillionaire'' according to the article the guy read. Howard said he's happy for Alison.
Howard let a bunch of phone callers yell at him. Everyone that called in agreed that the guy was crazy. Mariann from Brooklyn called in and went nuts on the guy. She brought up the World Trade Center attacks because she lost someone she knew. The Professor said that he believes that we brought the ''wrath of God'' on ourselves here because of our sins of lust. To Mariann it sounded like he condoned the attacks. He said he didn't but we did bring them on because of our women. Mariann went nuts again yelling at the guy about the women she knew who died in the attacks. It didn't faze the Professor though. He's got some group called R.E.S.P.E.C.T. going but he doesn't have a web site or phone number to call at this point. He also refused to tell Howard where he works as an Anthropology Professor.
Howard moved on to play a bunch of voice mail messages he's gotten lately. A couple of people complained about how lame the show has gotten lately. Another caller just cursed up a storm talking about Howard, Robin and the lighting of the Christmas tree in Rockefeller Center.
Howard played tape of Ron Jeremy's appearance on ''The View.'' Barbara Walters made a speech before he came on saying that she was against him coming on the show but her producers convinced her to let it happen. Howard said it's lame to badmouth and embarrass a guest before he comes on. If the guest is coming on you should let it happen and be nice to them while they're on. Howard and the crew ended up talking about Ron Jeremy for a few minutes after the clip.
A listener called in and played a couple of phony phone calls he made. He made one to some TV show and asked the host if she'd ''...have sex with How...'' and he got cut off. He did a similar call to another show. He mentioned having played a ''Baba Booey Guitar'' for a long time and then asked the host if he'd ''...let How...'' and he got cut off again.
The guy who called in with the phony phone calls wanted to win an Xbox so Howard let him play a game. Gary brought in a song to play and the caller had to guess who the singer was. The caller didn't have a clue so Howard wanted to hang up on the guy... which he did. The really lame song had Nicole Kidman singing with some guy by the name of Robbie Williams.
Howard took a phone call from a woman who told him about how she just found out her husband is gay. She said they were married for 12 years and she didn't know he was gay. She doesn't hold it against him though. She kept talking about how great a guy he was. She was also telling Howard how great he was during his divorce. Then she was kissing Gary's ass saying that he has grown over the years that she's been listening to the show. Then she was kissing Artie Lange's ass and it seemed that she doesn't dislike anyone. Howard asked her what she thinks of Osama bin Laden. She said that her daughter hates him so she doesn't like him. Then she said ''It would be nice if he died.'' She even sounded nice when she said that.
Howard had John perform bits of some of his hit songs while he was sitting in. He played a little bit of ''Jack and Diane'', ''Pink Houses'', ''Small Town'' and a little bit of his new song ''Peaceful World.''
As Howard was getting ready to wrap up the interview he was told about this guy who used to play with John's band who was featured on America's Most Wanted. He was wanted for child molestation and they kept bringing up the fact that the guy was in John's band. John said he doesn't know why they did that because he hasn't worked with the guy since the early 1980's. John went on to tell some funny stories about how strange the guy was. One story involved a hooker. He said this guy never really looked at chicks so they sent a hooker up to his room to see what he'd do. They had a tape recorder going in his room to see what he said to her. John said that the guy ended up giving the hooker a back rub and sent her off. John said the guy was a great musician but he was really strange.
Howard had John perform one last song before he left. He played a little bit of ''Paper and Fire'' and then Howard wrapped up the interview. Earlier in the show Howard thought about having John play some ''Gay Chicken'' with KC but that didn't come up for some reason.
Gary came in late this morning because he had to take the train in. Howard asked Gary if his wife needed the car or something. Gary said he's going up to Boston today and he's taking the train. Howard asked him why his wife didn't just drop him off and take the car home. Gary didn't understand why Howard was picking on him and ended up using the F-word on the air. He thinks that Howard was just twisting things around trying to make him miserable or something. Howard told him to get out of the studio but he wanted to stay. Stuttering John was laughing with his evil laugh at Gary's situation. Gary has to work tonight and then he has to watch the kids on Saturday because his wife is doing something. She's selling some jewelry or something so she's ''working'' according to Gary. At one point Howard said Gary was actually crying about the situation. Gary said he wasn't crying but he couldn't talk about this stuff anymore. Howard eventually apologized for goofing on him because he realized Gary wasn't mad at him, he was mad at his own life. Gary said he can't sleep late on Sunday because his wife won't be able to sleep in late Saturday morning. They have to do things equally with the kids.
Howard thinks Gary has given up a lot since he got married. He used to get tons of women and now he's stuck taking care of his kids. Howard was feeling bad for him and said he missed the old Gary. Howard had to take a break so Gary got a plug in real quick for his appearance up in Boston. He said he'll be at The Harp across from the Fleet Center tonight.
After Yucko left Howard replayed the songs that John Mellencamp performed on the show yesterday. He also did his George Harrison retrospective and played clips of his best songs. After that he played some clips of Jamie-Lynn Sigler's (Meadow Soprano on ''The Sopranos'') new CD. Howard said she's no worse than any of the other pop singers out there today. He said they were offered her as a guest but Howard's not sure what he'd do with her.
Howard also quickly mentioned a bunch of news stories that he found interesting before he moved on to the Wheel of Sex game. He spent a little time talking about Regis Philbin and ''Who Wants to be a Millionaire'' which is on the verge of being canceled.
Howard also talked about Paul Reubens (Pee Wee Herman) and his recent run-in with the law when his house was raided for kiddie porn. He read an article in the National Enquirer and the story was very disturbing. There was allegedly a 15 year old kid who claimed he was sexually abused by Paul and an actor friend.
When Jennifer came in (dressed in a bathing suit) Howard broke the news to her that she's not nearly as hot as Megan Mason. He said Jennifer is good looking but not on the level with Megan. He wouldn't give her number on a scale of 1 to 10 though. Howard spent a few minutes talking to the 23 year old and found out her breasts are two different sizes, that's why she wants the implants. Howard told her he'd give them to her and had Dr. Sal Calabro (SalCalabro.com) on the phone to ask him if he'd be willing to do the work. Of course Dr. Calabro is always happy to give away free implants so she's all set.
Howard told Jennifer about the Wheel of Sex and everything that was on it...
Howard said he saw the Pink ''Diary'' on MTV and thought that her childhood was pretty messed up. Howard spent some time on that subject and found out her father was a Vietnam Vet. Her parents broke up when she was 7 or 8. She lived with her mother for a while but she was always in trouble.
Howard said Gary thought Pink was a lesbian but she said she's not. She told Howard she once played a game of spin the bottle and she kissed Christina Aguilera but that was it. She has a boyfriend now who's a Freestyle Motocross dude by the name of Carey Hart. She didn't want to give out his whole name but once she gave a couple of details Stuttering John did some research and found out his full name. All of the guys made fun of her dating motocross rider for a while.
Howard got Mike Walker on the phone to play the game but something else came up that was more interesting to him. He'd asked Pink how long it takes for a guy to get in her pants. She told him it takes a long time and it could be 6 or 7 months before the guy gets sex. Howard ended up talking to her about that for a while and found out that Carey hasn't gotten any yet. Howard asked her if she at least gives the guy oral but she wouldn't give an answer to that question. She said that she doesn't like to get really emotional, like she does when she's having sex, until she really gets to know a guy. Howard told her that's like torture for a guy. She said she'll even sleep with the guy and not have sex with him. She said some guys can do that without wanting sex. Howard told her no guy can do that, it's just no possible.
After a really long interview Howard moved on to play the game so here's how it goes... Each week Mike Walker calls in with four gossip stories. Three of the stories are from his National Enquirer gossip column. One of the stories is false. Everyone tries to pick out the false story. The stories will appear in Mike's gossip column each week after he plays with Howard. Here are this week's stories:
After the game Howard spent a couple more minutes talking to Pink before wrapping up the very long interview. Pink's new album ''Missundaztood'' is available now.
He didn't get far before Scott Einziger from E! came in. Today is his last day working for E! so Howard said goodbye to him. Howard thinks he's nuts for leaving E! to move out to Los Angeles to work on the CBS TV show ''Amazing Race.'' Howard thinks it's a really bad idea and he's let Scott know that on more than one occasion. Today he did the same thing. He also said that he hates to lose Scott and he liked working with him. He said he wishes him the best but he still thinks it's a bad decision to leave. Howard ended up having a long discussion about the whole thing without any luck changing Scott's view. Scott couldn't change Howard's either so they were at a deadlock.